Pregnancy And Welcoming The Ba
Date:
Channel: Ibrahim Nuhu
File Size: 95.50MB
Related
- Abdul Rahman Chao – Jumuah khutbah 4-06-21
- Nadim Bashir – Khatira – The LAST Expedition of the Prophet Muhammad
- Waleed Basyouni – al-Wasiyyah as-Sughraa [The Concise Legacy Advice] Book #01
- Karim Abuzaid – Thanksgiving – Stand Up For Islam
- Mirza Yawar Baig – Ramadan Reminder #29
- Mohamad Baajour – 55 Aauthu #11 This Duaa is for protection from ANY EVIL
- Muhammad ibn Adam al-Kawthari – Hakim Al-Umma Thanawi on Mawlana Ahmad Rida Khan Barelwi
AI Generated Summary ©
The importance of finding one's own happiness during the pregnancy is emphasized, along with the need to be mindful and work with the mother. The speakers advise parents to try to convince their own mother to live in a natural way, practice praying and not overburden themselves, and to learn to handle the situation alone and not let anyone else mess with their behavior. The importance of sunroials in Islam, including the use of the "other" in the future, is emphasized, along with the importance of slaughtering animals for various purposes and avoiding harmsome behavior. The session concludes with a recommendation for parents to review previous sessions and book recommendations.AI Generated Transcript ©
I do expect to find happiness in the
heart if you don't have a relationship with
the one who created the heart.
I'd like to welcome everyone
once again for our a to z of
turbia
series ongoing with our beloved Sheikh Sheikh Doctor
Ibrahim Nuhu.
Sheikh,
for joining us once again, taking the time
out to be here with us. We really,
really appreciate it.
So till now, we have discussed with regards
to, the marriage process, how one approaches the
family. We discussed about,
what happens during the marriage. We spoke about
the nikka contract. We spoke about the Waleema.
We spoke about the beginning of the family
life.
In today's discussion, we are going to be
looking at, the pregnancy
as well as what to do
after the childbirth.
So without further ado, inshallah, shaykh, we jump
into it. Insha'Allah.
Our first question for today would be
how does a family
navigate,
when they hear about the pregnancy,
the news about the pregnancy,
how does one break it to the family?
How do we navigate it from there?
Pregnancy
after the marriage is the first success
in in the marriage,
and therefore,
the husband
should take it with a great, joy and
happiness.
And also thank Allah
first and foremost,
because
millions of people are looking for this opportunity
but they don't get it. They marry maybe
many times
looking for
the opportunity to have
the blessings of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala in
getting children, but Allah did not give them
because having a child is a gift from
Allah
that he gives whomsoever he wishes.
Allah
says To Allah
belongs to the kingdom of the heavens and
the earth, and he creates
whatsoever he wishes
Allah
gives whomsoever
he wishes
enough female
contrary to
the the belief in the past among some
of the Arabs that having a daughter
is deficiency.
So it's a gift from Allah Subhanahu Wa
Ta'ala and his blessing to have a daughter.
Wa yaha buli maisha'ud zakur and some Allah
Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala will give them only males,
some of them only females,
and some of them only males. And I
know people who every time he has a
child,
and
he,
is a male. And some of them whenever
they have a child, he's a female. Mhmm.
That's a gift from Allah.
And some people Allah will combine both for
them.
And it's our knowledge, Ibrahim Alaihi Salam
only
had had
males. And this is what came to us
according to the history. We might find something
else, but we cannot verify.
Yeah. But what we know is Ismail and,
Ismail. Ismail.
These are only children that
gave him. After that, did he,
you know,
get something else apart from them? Wallahu 'ala.
So he has only males, and, you have
Lut, alayhis salaam,
as only females daughters
and Rasool Allah Sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam, Allah
combine both as male and he has,
females as,
his children. So Allah says he is the
one who is doing this.
And some people, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will
will make them akim. Akim means parents, somebody
who is not
able to produce children.
So this ability
to have a child
is also a gift from Allah Subhanahu Wa
Ta'ala.
So that's
why a Muslim is supposed to look at
it as a gift and a blessing from
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala that his wife is
pregnant now. Therefore he has to take care
of it properly,
the pregnancy itself and also the one who
is taking
responsibility of carrying the pregnancy
because honestly speaking,
right after the pregnancy for those who are
married, you know what,
what usually happens.
Allah says,
You know, I always call it,
the process of being,
I mean, having the pregnancy, you know, the
procedures.
I don't see it as a sickness.
This is how it is. This is just
pregnancy.
She's going to remain like this for almost
1 month. Her emotional feelings will change,
will be very very very low.
Things which she used to accept, but now
she might not accept it. She's gonna be
very sensitive in most instances
although it is also a good advice to
the mothers they should try to be moderate.
There are things which cannot be control.
Yeah. But in most instances, she can controls
the feeling
Not to turn into a very sensitive,
you
know, person in the family in the way
if she has children, they will not enjoy
living with her. The husband also will not
enjoy living with her. She should understand that
this is a test from Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala for her to make sure that she
passed this test, and she always ask Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala to give her ease and
try her best to live a normal life
with everyone.
Things which are beyond her control, then the
husband should understand that. The family should understand
that. That's why as a husband,
he should always try to avoid things which
can provoke her sensitivity,
and also his kindness should increase
150
or 60 degrees, you know, he has to
go to the highest, you know, level of
his, leniency and gentleness and patience also.
Yeah. Definitely. He has to increase his patience.
Yeah. Because of that time, as I said,
it is not a sickness, but these are
the feeling that we keep coming to have
for the period of,
Subhanallah 9 months. You have,
Zahid, some of them,
they can't eat anything, which they used to
eat.
They don't like any smell, and,
some of them, they keep vomiting. Whenever they
eat, they vomit.
And
some of these sisters they eat clay.
Clay? Yeah. Clay.
Literally,
clay. That's why I think they have a
specific one that the doctors provide which,
is healthy for them. It's not good to
go for it, but that one can serve
a little bit of purpose with less
harm. Yeah. They have, they say a woman
just go to cliche. This is the only
thing she smells, and she finds it interesting
to eat.
So
if, as a husband, you're gonna take it
as a serious matter, then now she she's
changing wider changes,
you will be fighting, you know, clashing, and
that's
really will affect,
what do you call the pregnancy,
what do you call, process.
So patience is needed. Tolerance is needed. But
as I said, the sister also should understand
the fact that she's living with others.
This person is
is doing everything he does, you know, to
show his concern and he cares about her.
She should also pity him.
Don't over burden him with more than what
he can bear. So the emotion should remain
no problem, but she should be moderate as
much as she she could. But as I
said, the most important thing is the husband
reaction towards these,
emotional,
feelings. It should be a very tolerant person,
a very patient person. And, also, whatever she
need, as long as it is within his
affordability, just give it to her. We need
her mood
to be calm. Mhmm. She really need that
at that at that time. Yeah. The mood
should be calm and also
he will see things which in Ishmaelah,
Ashbaq closer to being
a child, you know.
Yeah. I don't take them, you know,
something which is not,
I don't know how to put it, you
know, necessary, but I take it as
the nature of the pregnancy, and the husband
should understand that. You know? She acts like,
the way her children are doing, you know,
the demand Mhmm. That that thinking, you know,
he just, close his eyes and just go
with that. Yeah. Whatever she wants, just do
it.
This is who she is at that time.
If the pregnancy is not there, she will
not be like that. So it's just a
temporary period of time that a husband can
gain her side or lose her completely because
whatever clash happened during that time of the
pregnancy, trust me, Zahid, the wife will never
forget it.
If it is mercy, she will not forget
that one. If it is harshness, she will
not forget that one. And in the future,
she might refer to this and tell him,
yeah, this man was very harsh. Even when
I was,
pregnant also, he doesn't show that much of
leniency that he was supposed to be doing.
Yeah. So that's what I
will, advise the family to do. They should
always cooperate and be with her.
Let her feel that she's not alone in
this. That is somebody who's always siding with
her.
Sheikh, so here we are touching upon the
the husband's role. Right? Let's extend it a
bit more towards the family.
So in this situation, would you suggest that
she goes live with her family where her
mother is there, or should that family come
and, you know, stay with her, take care
of her? No.
It is not necessary at all. Mhmm. And
if people go with the culture, I'm not
going to touch the culture. Mhmm. Let them
do whatever is the
cultural practice among them. As long as it
is not violating any part of the Sharia,
it's fine.
But I don't see it as something that
is necessary.
Mhmm.
Why am I saying this? Because, Zaheed, this
is something that is going to be repeated.
Mhmm. We don't expect her mother to always
be be with her, especially those people who
are staying overseas.
So hey. You know, that's why there there
is a lot of complaint, you know, a
lot of complaints.
My mother is not there. Nobody to support
is to support me. Yeah. Because we already
believe that somebody has to be there to
support.
So we should train ourselves to accommodate the
situation
alone without the support and help of anyone.
This is better.
If we get the mother or the sister
to be with them, that's fine.
But we should just train ourselves
to believe that this is our job.
Yeah. Whether we have the support of the
parent or we they are not here to
support us, we should keep on moving.
Utilize the available. Now she's the only one,
she and,
what do you call the husband? They should
utilize the available and keep moving like that.
If later on, the the family
managed to reach her and support her,
but if they don't manage to reach her,
life will not change. Mhmm. Yeah. Otherwise, she
will keep on hanging around there being disturbed
mentally,
and she will not be able to to
be productive.
And there's a very good message also that
I always give, the sisters.
I always tell that a sister should be
very careful. Otherwise,
8 month, 9 month of her life is
wasted.
Although she's doing the jihad of carrying the
child, but at that period of time, we
could achieve a lot.
If she submit submit completely to the weaknesses,
you know, many of them stop studying, stop
doing anything in the house, you know.
For the period of 9 months. This is
too much.
Yeah. She should try her best not to
overburden herself and pressure herself. No. But there
is always something she can do.
Yeah. Yeah. There's always something she can do.
So life should be continuous. Right? So if
she get a mother or
a sister, you know, the mother or the
sister to come and help her, alhamdulillah,
that she should design her her life in
a way whether they are here or they're
not here, we will keep, moving. Yeah. This
is my advice. And if the family are
there, they should show support.
Yeah. This is better, for them to show
support because she is watching and she's waiting
for this. Mhmm. And it will make her
happier to see people who are around
her also showing concern.
As they said,
and if Musiva,
a calamity and a test when it is
with everyone, and you see people also cooperating
with you,
the
the pressure of the the the calamity will
be very, very low. Yeah. Yeah. Lagrange is
good. Yeah. I mean, Sheikh Zawe mentioned that,
the woman should train herself to, you know,
anticipate this the, the pregnancy part individually.
So So if we look at the story
of, Mariam Alaihi Salam,
there also she was alone when she gave
birth. So any lessons that we can derive
from this story well, I think that this
is the only story of the pregnancy that
we have from the Quran.
So any lessons that we can derive from
this?
A lot of,
lessons, you know, that tells people to
try their best to live natural.
Mhmm. Because in villages, I believe, up to
date,
sisters are giving birth with little amount of
help. And we told some of them in
the it should be in the farm. Even
at that time, you know, in the last
minute of her pregnancy, she's still going to
the farm. She's still contributing to the house,
activities. She's still benefiting others. You know, laziness
is not part of their life. They do
what they can,
afford doing.
Yeah. So she'll give birth in the farm
and wash the baby, fix the baby,
do everything necessary, and then bring the baby
home. We just see her carrying the baby.
Mhmm. So nobody will have doubt in this
because they already know she's pregnant.
Yeah. That's it. Which
and to imagine that in a
life we're having nowadays in the cities,
and I don't say it is impossible, but
almost impossible. Mhmm. And I relate this to
the kind of life we're dealing with.
Our life is based on artificial,
and you can say the life is artificial.
So the body is not, having that strength
to resist
the pressure of the pregnancy and the and
the delivery.
So Mariam did
it alone. Mhmm. You know, she did it
alone with the support and the help of
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. And everyone she was
looking for support. Allah did not just,
bring it down for her. It says,
shake the the tree,
and then
the fruit will come.
In the last month, I'll ask her to
use the,
then he will take the the responsibility of
give giving her the the result.
So that's the reason why I said previously
that a person, a woman should train herself
to handle these things
alone as much as she could. Where she
need help, then somebody should come and help
her
and,
the community or the family should help without
waiting for her to look for for that.
Yeah. Because Mariam,
when the makad comes, she just go, to
the place, you know,
looking for the place which is appropriate for
her to give, the birth and deliver the
child and then brought it back home. So
if a woman trained herself, you know, to
believe that this is my job and I'm
supposed to do it alone even if nobody's
shown support,
then she will be able to be
with this kind of courage
If it happens that she's going to leave
alone, also to do that which is which
is necessary.
And, also, it's good for women to be
aware of how to receive a child
in case the delivery might come when she
is not next to somebody who can show
support. Because usually, these type of things don't
wait. Same. There is a circumstance where the
child is already,
near to come out. She can't do anything.
Otherwise, the child the child might lose his
life. She's had to let it come out.
And when they come out, sometimes they might
come with this, what
what do you call? The the machine with
the glove. You know, the child when he's
inside is covered by some skin. Sometimes that
one comes. Somebody has to cut for the
child to be able to breathe because now
in the system which is there
in the in the stomach is not in
the womb is not there outside so they
need to open for the child and some
other things also,
that they have to do. So it's good
for her to be aware of this because
Maria fixed the child alone and brought him
back, to the,
to the people.
And,
and, that's it. I think these are the
main thing that I can, see in the
see story of, Mariam Alaihi Salam.
So just to summarize that, so we are
saying she should prepare herself
and learn about how to
deliver in the first place? Deliver in the
that's really good. Mhmm. And I guess we
have a lot of, midwives that can teach
a person,
the first aid in this in this regard.
Yeah. Say say say. Because I believe if
a man can do it or his wife,
for sure, the wife can learn how to
do things Mhmm. Alone.
Now it is unfortunate that we are living
a life whereby even to shave the hair,
hair of Al Hassan or Hussein and,
give charity with the the wasn't
that's been they they do. You know? Mhmm.
Yeah. So these type of things, there's they
seems to be simple, but, unfortunately, the kind
of life we are living,
nowadays in the city,
doesn't give chance to the sisters to learn
these things. Mhmm. Mhmm. Yeah. Even the liver
itself, also sisters don't like to go with
the normal one, which is natural,
healthier. They want to be cut. The cesarean.
Yeah. The cesarean. Because they think, this is
easy. You know, just go and go into
that state of, unconsciousness and then
this is very dangerous because, this has its
own limitation. You know? 3 to 4 kids,
and then you cannot have anymore. Mhmm. Mhmm.
Yeah. But that's not good for her. Not
good for her health because there are certain
sickness which are,
generated when a woman is not giving
is not having children.
Having
child itself and being in the womb is
a protection from some other diseases.
Usually, the sisters that stay for so long
without having this, they
develop another kind of problem, which sometimes they
need to go for surgery to remove it.
Mhmm. Yeah.
Yeah.
Sheikh So we also mentioned about, there are
different periods of time, like long periods of
time in the in pregnancy where,
the mother could be feeling weaknesses and whatnot.
And because of this, they leave off everything.
They cut off from classes, studying,
housework, etcetera etcetera.
So what would you advise or suggest,
the mothers to do during this time to
make it beneficial or productive for themselves? Well,
I not not to stop anything
Mhmm. Except what cannot be done.
Yeah.
She's vomiting.
She's suffering from pain.
You can't ask her to to go and
you cannot ask her to go and, memorize
her Quran. Mhmm. Cannot ask her to go
and cook at that time.
Cannot ask her to go and sweep the
house. You know? You cannot ask her to
go and do all of those heavy things.
You know? At that time the husband should
take over or should bring somebody who can
replace her in that regard,
but this comes occasionally
You know,
and usually in the first
month, few months of the pregnancy.
After 4 months, usually the stability take place.
Yeah. In this case, the awareness comes from
time to time. Yeah. But it's not that
much. It's not as bad as the first
period, you know. And even during the 1st
few months, I will really advise
her sister to
not stop anything.
Keep moving. This is 8 to 9 month
of your life
and
being gone just like that. Although
you're doing something, you know, which is also
good for the Ummah, but we can combine
between this and many other things which you
don't need to delay them. Yeah. You can
keep memorizing the Quran,
keep giving the tarbiyah,
keep having the activities in the house, and
this is also good for her also to
be
part of the home activities.
Yeah. I remember,
a sister
delivered a child in a very simple way
in the hospital.
So the doctor was asking
what really happened? What was she doing before?
They told her she just came back from
Hajj. He said, yeah. That's why.
Yeah. Because they recommend
exercise, especially in the last Being active? Yeah.
Being active. Mhmm. Especially in the last,
months of the,
what do you call the pregnancy, it's not
good for her to be lazy.
It's good for her to be active.
To exercise. Of course, not heavy exercise, those
simple ones, but doing them continuously.
That sister came back from Hajj, so when
she delivered
Very easily, the doctor related to that one.
He says, yeah. That's that's that's
it. So what I'm saying is rather than
waiting until the last minute when the pregnancy
happens,
keep moving.
Whatever could be done, just do.
Don't let somebody to come and help just
because a woman is pregnant. You know?
Just because she's pregnant, and then she just
entertain everyone to come and handle her responsibilities.
Oh, this is not good for her. But
things which she cannot do, then the husband,
she'll understand
that. That's why husband's focus on her should
be more than his focus before the the
pregnancy.
Yeah. To make sure that he monitor her
feelings.
Yeah. Because these things cannot be hidden.
Once he sees her that, yes, she's in
a situation, her husband should
force her to stay away from it because
sometimes,
especially when you are dealing with a good
husband,
she might be shy of letting him go
for these
things. Mhmm. You know, and in this time
around, the husband should force her actually to
sit down and rest.
He go and do it or invite anyone
amongst his sisters to come and do it
or bring somebody to handle the case who
is out of the the family, but not
her. And that's his responsibility. That's his responsibility.
And it's good actually for
the good relationship also. Mhmm. Yeah. Because she
cannot forget this.
Sisters are not like the brothers. You know,
you or somebody might do all of these
kindness, you know, you wanna you will not
remember the way he's doing them. But, subhallah,
sister is not like that. That's why the
prophet
called
them
means glasses, you know, those cup of Messles.
Yeah. Call them.
Yeah. Something that will make a sister happy,
and she will become very emotional, and she
will be attached to a person.
Maybe with the brother, you have to do
millions of them and still think, you know,
whether he is okay or not. You know?
Mhmm. Yeah. But it's who they are. This
is who the brothers are. So everyone a
lot and this is good actually for them
to be like that. So those kind of,
you know, words
and those kind of support the husband is
going to be having,
I mean given to the wife during the
pregnancy, trust me, it would do a lot
in bringing the wife closer to him and
attached to him and she will never forget
this. And that will be the reason why
she will try to stay away from anything
that will hurt his feeling in the future
because she knows who he is. Mhmm. Yeah.
Yeah. LaGrange is, good. So as I said,
I really advise sisters
to
revisit
their behavior and their attitude during the pregnancy.
They have to keep on being productive. Mhmm.
Do whatever is possible.
What is impossible, then they stay away from
it, and the husband should take over from
that time. Mhmm. Jake, a lot of time,
it's also said that it's good to play
the Quran in the background while you're working
because it affects the baby as well. What
would you say about that? Inside the womb.
Inside the womb. I don't have any,
evidence to support,
this.
But if it is true that the baby
is picking up what is I mean, he
hears what we're talking about. If this has
come from and true,
then it's good for the house to be
with the Quran.
So he's familiar with the Quran before he
even comes.
If it is true, if it it could
be proven scientifically that the baby he is,
what we are doing around us. Yeah. But
if it is not proven, it doesn't make
sense. Just leave your normal life, but don't
think that the child is
listening to what you are doing.
So, also, in this specific period of pregnancy,
we mentioned that there are weaknesses, and there's
so many things that the person cannot do.
So from a fic perspective,
what would be the rugsas
that would be there for the mother?
She has to do every she's just like
every any other woman,
except when it comes to fasting.
Mhmm. As for the other rituals,
she is less like anybody else. Mhmm. Yeah.
She has to pray to Allah
and if she can afford fasting, she fast
also.
Even in the prayer, she's praying like sitting
or I know. That it depends on ability.
Mhmm. Let's say
it is too much upon her and especially
when the pregnancy is about
In the later stages. Yeah.
So in this case, sometimes making ruku will
be very tough.
So what I will advise the sister is
if she can make the without,
pressure on herself without getting in trouble
to make a ruku, but make it short.
No lengthy,
ruku.
Yeah. Make it short.
But no lengthy one.
But if that is not possible also,
it really put her into
into trouble then in this case,
she should just sit down and pre seat
it.
Yeah. This of Imran,
even Hussein is,
what do you call, really applicable,
on this matter. She just remain
seated, sit according to what that pregnancy can
afford, and then, pray with just bending her
head a bit for the and for the
sujood a bit more. If she can make
sujood, the sujood should be like this, and
the sujood should make the lomo sujood if
that is possible. Whatever she can do, she
does it. Mhmm. Yeah. If she can stand,
then she stand.
The places where she cannot,
do it, then she sit down and do
what she can do. Let's say she can
stand. So she stand up and pray. But
when it comes to the ruku, if ruku
cannot be done, then what does she do?
She sit down and do the ruku seated.
If she can go for for the sujood,
she make the correct sujood. If not, then
she do the sujood. In the same way,
she's making the
a bit lower than than the sujood.
Yeah. So these are the, the thing. Other
than that, she's just like any other, like
any other We were mentioning about fasting. Yeah.
Fasting also, she can break her fast. Mhmm.
You know, if she's afraid of, getting into
trouble or the child also would get into
trouble, she can break the fast, and there
is nothing wrong with that. Then later
after Ramadan, then she she fast
she make up those, days she missed. Yeah.
That's the best opinion of this call, inshallah.
And any, thing needs to be given in
charity or so she wasn't missing out on
these fasts? She doesn't need to pay anything.
She just have to replace,
she has to replace the day she missed,
and that's it. Mhmm.
Sheikh, it also happens a lot of the
time, especially when you're looking at it from,
the subcontinent and many of these different regions
where people take oaths
that if such and such child happened, let's
say, a specific gender that they're looking for,
be it a boy or a girl, then
I'll go for Hajj, or I'll,
spend $1,000
in charity, or I'll do something.
So it's like another or an ode that
they have taken.
What would you say about this? Well, I
advise a person at the first place to
always ask Allah to grant him good
because you don't know
which one is better for you amongst your
kids, how many people
are they want they don't want girls, they
want boys, And so, they have the boys,
but they wish they don't have.
And how many people wants girls? Although it's
a few
apart from the sisters.
Mhmm. Usually, people want boys up to date.
Although we don't go and exaggerate like the
people of the past who killed the girl
just because she's a girl.
But still, this mentality, the balance of it
is still there,
which is wrong
for a person to have this. Yeah. It's
good to have a interest to have one
gender of a children. It's okay, but a
person shouldn't exaggerate.
And my advice to
parent is to look for good
because you don't know which one is good.
Boy or girl, you don't know.
Just ask Allah's mother to grant you good,
and whatever he granted you make him good,
boy or girl.
If this comes,
then if a person wants to give some
charity, he does it without making any oath.
Mhmm. But to have a swearing or to
take a oath that if Allah
granted me a boy,
I will go for Hajj.
It's not good.
Yeah, and sometimes what happens is, that Allah
Subhan might test the person by giving him
that.
And then the issue of now going to
Hajj comes in. Then he will start looking
for the scholars.
Is there any concession? Is there any raksha?
You know, how can I do with this?
You know, he was supposed to be thinking
about this before he
said the the oath.
So my advice is
not to go for this at all the
prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam will dislike another,
a person should just ask Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala to grant him good
even not to specify.
Although it's okay for a person to say,
Allah grant me a daughter, Allah grant me
a boy, so it's fine. Mhmm. But I
will ask
and I will advise the person to ask
Allah's wanted to grant him good. For the
boy or girl, Allah's want to grant him
a righteous child.
Yeah.
That's better for him. Yeah. And then when
the child that he's looking for comes, if
he wants to do charity, just do it.
Mhmm. Yeah. Without being obliged to make that
charity. Mhmm. But it's just up to him
to,
appreciate
what I last want to give him in
that way or to stay away from that
kind of appreciation.
But let's say in this case, if they
have taken such a oath or they have
made such an oath,
what are they gonna do after that if
it doesn't happen or if they have to
break the oath? How do you They have
to do the kafar.
Mhmm. Yeah.
And, just to fix my words when I
said, if he wants to stay from that
kind
of appreciation I mean, the appreciation whereby you
go for how'd you do this and that.
A person should appreciate what a lost mortal
does,
and he's doing that for him all the
time,
but I'm just referring to the another itself.
Yeah. And if a person is not, willing
to keep it,
which is wrong, the first place,
or a person finds himself in a situation
whereby he cannot keep that another. Yeah. In
this case, he has to go for the
kafar.
Yeah. He has to go for the kafara
to free a sleep
if you can find 1
or to fast
I'm I'm sorry, or to feed 10 needy
people.
Give them a meal, provide them, bring them
all, and then provide them with a complete
meal.
Each and every one of them eat, and
that's
it. Or to give them cloth
the dress to wear,
Each and every one of them. If a
person cannot do one of these 3,
then he goes for the fasting for 3
days continuously.
If one of those,
options is not easy to be attained, then
he has to go for,
fasting for 3 days 3 days continuously also
according to the of Abdulai Musud,
for.
He
He's he's fasting for 3 days continuously.
Yeah. So that's why I said it's not
good for him to do it at the
first place, but if he does, he has
to keep that promise. If he doesn't wanna
keep
it or he cannot keep it, then in
this case, he has to go for
the
the kafar. Mhmm.
Shaguar, I think here, especially when we're talking
about the nether and the oath and all
of that stuff Mhmm. This, what we said,
is something which is disliked, but if a
person does it, it's
there. But you also see situations where people
would be visiting the graves and the shrines,
and they're tying ribbons in these places
and asking
these aulias, so called aulias that, you know,
bless us through your
and so on and so forth. What advice
would you have for such parents? Well, these
are all shirk
and shaitan. Shaitan is playing with the with
the brain of others in their hearts.
These people that we take Auliya, first of
all, we take them as Auliya, first of
all. How do we know they're Auliya at
the first place?
That's number 1. And even if they're confirmed
to be auliya,
you know, what evidence do we have to
go and ask them even if they are
alive? If they are alive, we're not supposed
to ask them. We're supposed to ask Allah
Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. There was no case to
my knowledge where they used to go to
the prophet, salallahu alayhi wa sallam, and ask
him to do
for them that which only Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala does. Mhmm. So this Walid that I'm
thinking of him to be the Walid,
he dies now.
If he could benefit himself for sure, he
wants to live more.
Why couldn't he stay? You know?
He died maybe out of sickness. He couldn't
remove that sickness from himself. And now I'm
asking him to grant me health
from my sickness. He himself, he couldn't benefit
himself, you know. It doesn't even make sense,
you know. Mhmm. But unfortunately,
people are attaching themselves to other than Allah
Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. And as such, you know,
they get into trouble all the time.
That's why
says
the root of are
3.
Number 1 is
having the heart being connected with other Allah
attaching your heart to other Allah.
All forms of shirk and riya, wisdom and
the grave in that regard and hanging yourself
with awliya, these are all part of this
caused by this,
what do
you
call it? The second one is,
alcohol,
the power of the anger
and the power of the desire.
You know, every sin that you see somebody
is committing
in this life
is because of one of these three things
either the heart is I mean hang and
connected to other than Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
or
he couldn't defeat this power and the strength
of the of the anger. And that's why
you have the murder and all of these
clashes and the battles and the fightings, you
know, and also curses and bad words and
all of these things that people are saying
to each other. And you have the last
one is, of course, Shawani.
He couldn't battle that,
desire.
That's why Zina
and Lewaat, you know, and taking riba, bribes,
stealing. These are all based on following the
desire. Mhmm. So that's why says
these are the three roots of the the.
And the first one is the one that
is related to what these guys are doing
when they go to the grave
asking
other than Allah because the heart is already
attached to those ones rather than connecting it
with
Allah.
Allah guide guide them. They should know that
this person doesn't hold
benefit or harm. If he does, he will
benefit himself. In his life with us, he
has been sick from time to time Mhmm.
Many times.
And we are helping him to go to
the hospital with him,
But still somebody is hanging around him thinking
that this person can solve all of my
problems.
Mhmm.
Ameen. Ameen. Mashiq, so moving forward now, we
come to the next, phase, which which would
be the actual birth of the child. Is
there any specific
Dua that should be recited,
during the birth of the child or to
welcome the child?
Well, I can't remember something specifically from the
prophet
for the mothers to be reciting,
except
that some says it's good for her to
remember Allah
by saying
I can't confirm this to be the sunnah
of the prophet
where he asked somebody to do this.
But remembering Allah
is always good. It brings comfort
and ease the affairs of the one who
is saying it. Mhmm. Any dhikr that is
authentically,
you
know, you know, I will advise the mothers
to intensify this when they are in the
process of delivery. Inshallah,
make it easy,
for them. And, also ask Allah
to during that,
moment for Allah to make things easy for
for them because she is.
Mhmm. Because this at that time, Zionist,
the issue of life or death.
You know, that's why I can see even
Sharia says if she dies at that time,
be enlightened, Allah, the hope for her to
go to paradise is very great. She's a
shahida.
If she died at that moment, she is
considered as one of the shawada in Islam.
So you can see that it really is
a very tough moment. It's not a joke,
you know.
So she should remember Allah
She should do the normal things for Allah
to make it easy for for her, Insha'Allah.
And a wicked
that comes to her mind.
Any other vehicle, you know, and ask Allah
to ease her affairs.
Right? That's it until the time she delivers,
the child. Yeah.
Mhmm.
When it comes to pregnancy, not all pregnancies
are, of course, successful.
And,
just one thing before you go. Sorry. As
I hit. And also the husband and the
wife, you know,
they should try their best
to do the necessary, not to expose the
the woman
to a male doctor.
Mhmm. Yeah. Because sometimes the one who is
acting as a midwife is a male.
It's haram for them to do that as
long as there is a female to do
that
because it is haram for every Muslim to
look at the aura of another sister
whether he's a doctor or anybody else because
unfortunately nowadays the doctors they think they have
a permission from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to
look at any part of the woman. No.
This is not they don't have this permission
any
from Allah subawata'ala
to add to be acting as an exemption
that I am a doctor, then I can
do whatever I want to know. They can
only do it when there is a necessity.
Yeah. If there is a male doctor,
I'm sorry, female doctor, she has to go
to the female doctor.
If there is no female doctor, then the
male doctor, if they cannot have any alternative,
which is halal,
then the male doctor can do the job
restricting himself to that need, and that's it.
Other than that, the woman should be covered.
That's why all of her body should be
covered.
Only that place, and he has to lower
his guess, his gaze and, also just focus
on the child.
Yeah. Not the the the private part of,
for women. It's very, very dangerous.
So my advice to any parent is to
hear Allah
and the husband should be very, very, very
serious on this.
This is his privacy. Same. And this is
his honor and dignity. He shouldn't
just go and submit his family to any
any person. So as long as there is
a woman, they have to look for that
sister to help her in the delivery.
And male doctors are not allowed to go
to that place. Mhmm. Yeah. They are not
allowed. Islamically, it's haram for him to go.
Unless if there is a need for him
to be there and there is no any
other sister who can do it except him,
then we just close our eyes and let
him go.
And and even,
in that situation, he has to restrict himself
to that need. Mhmm. Only right after that,
the woman has to be covered completely.
They have this,
Jewish, you know I don't know if if
I'm doing justice to the Jew, you know,
if I say that they do that because,
in terms of,
what do you call, decency and following,
what do you call the hijab,
the Jews, you know, the old one, you
know, north or the Orthodox. Yeah.
Those ones, they don't
you know, I've I've heard in some countries,
they they do everything possible to know that
their wives are having privacy.
Mhmm. Man is not going to the place
where they go. You know? And,
yeah. So this system that we take in
our hospitals,
this is corporate system. Mhmm. But we still
hold upon it just like the martial art.
You know, our children in our school,
they mix
for the for the trainer.
Mhmm. That's
whatever you call it. Intention doesn't work here
because that's bending as a for somebody. It's
only for Allah's out of respect
out of respect. Yeah. It's only for Allah.
Why can't we take the the teachings?
And at the same time, when it comes
to that, what do you call taheya,
greetings,
we make we change it with salaam.
Assalamu
alaikum. Rather than making those because I
I was attending an event, you know, yesterday
when they are demonstrating
their skills.
Before they say the salaam, they say some
word,
which I believe this word is not local
word. It's not a Malay. It's not a
Chinese, but that,
whatever,
what do you call, language the language of
the inventor of this, what do you call,
self defense thing is they are speaking that
language. Mhmm. Why do I need to speak
his language? You know?
I take the training. I take everything.
But then when it comes to
other matters, I have to also consider my
religion. Mhmm. It was someone saying assalamualaik
rather than speaking their language as a greeting
to this Muslim and he's Muslim. Right? Rather
than speaking those things, which whether he understand
or he doesn't understand why does he take
this one as a respect rather than taking
the one that he will be rewarded when
he replies,
I will be rewarded. No. I'm doing my,
defense things. I'll get the reward when I
say assalamu alaikum. Why can't we take it
and modify it and make it in the
Islamic
Islamic way? So I see
most of our practices, we just take the
whole thing
rather than taking that which is halal,
yeah, and use it. No. We just take
the whole thing and do it and tell
people, no. These are necessities.
This is how the thing is. The Aurora.
The Aurora, unfortunately.
So in hospitals,
up to date, the system remain in the
way it is.
May the free mixing unnecessarily.
Doctor and a and a nurse, they sit
in a place, you know, very close to
each other, and they're not husband and wife.
Mhmm. And we don't care because this is
how the hospitals are. And the person who
is going to for the operation, her sister,
unfortunately, you will see there is a room
for her to change.
From that room, she took off a hijab
and wear that simple clothes to go to
the to the place, and they were going
to take and pass,
her through
Nanmahalim and everyone has to see her in
that in that situation. And sometimes even the
hijab she takes off,
she takes it off and she wear that
small cuff.
This is haram for the Muslim to do
that.
A sister shouldn't agree with this. She has
to fight,
and the doctors should agree, should accept. Mhmm.
Because this is what medicine says.
A patient has to tell you what he
wants, and you have to treat him according
to the way he wants.
And honestly speaking,
what
the what is the necessity of her taking
off hijab from the room before the the
operation room?
Why?
Until now, I try to understand this. I
found nothing. No justification for it. Mhmm. What
we are doing as a we are the
Muslim. We are still doing these these things.
Why can't she go there? Why can't we
can't we provide a room where she can
go and take off a hijab and get
ready, you know, and just open the place
where they need,
you know, and then come like that. Why
can't we do that?
You know? And also to make what I'm
saying there, correct, you know, when the sister
fight,
at the end of the day, they give
her what she wants, and they do the
surgery effectively
by that means we can do it effectively
without having all of those things which we
have taken from others.
Yeah. Lagrange is good. So these are matters
that we'd really have to
pay attention to them and, do what is
needed Islamically to teach people lessons
so that they will not do it with
others, you know. If I resist, you resist,
trust me.
They will readjust the system because they know
that not everyone in the community is accepted.
Yeah. We talk about freedom of speech,
freedom of, you know, actions, you know, and
all of these things as long as you
are not harming others. Why can't we apply
this in our hospitals also? Mhmm. Mhmm. Yeah.
I choose the way I want you to
treat me.
If he cannot just apologize,
let a person go and look for others.
But he cannot impose your religion and your
virtues and your values, you know, cultural practice
on me just because you want to give
me a medicine which is which might not
be necessary.
Mhmm. Yeah. Especially when, this happens, a place
where you're paying money for that.
Even in public hospitals, you know, public hospital,
they have all of these banners that are
saying
you shouldn't be forced to accept treatment other
than what you look for, but the doctors
are not doing.
And nobody's there to question them, you know.
May Allah guide them. Amen. Amen. That's why
we need
Muslim and practicing doctors
who are aware of the Sharia, and also
they have,
what do you call the skills in the
medicine. They have the expertise. These are the
people we need. The person who will not
come and clash with the Sharia. The person
who will tell the woman who came to
him that there is a female doctor should
go and see that when she's available. Don't
come to me. Person who will not tolerate,
you
know,
any, you know,
that is not appropriate, you know, in his
presence. The person who will restrict himself to
the need.
And a doctor,
he wanted to check about a woman, but
he insisted that she has to open a
place which she refused. She said, you are
not. I don't have sickness in that place.
My sickness in the in the leg. What
happened to my face? What do you want
to do with it? And she was insisted
that she has to open. I was like,
okay. I don't know what is the connection,
you know.
He's a Muslim, and she's a Muslim. He
knows in Islam if he studied that that
as a doctor, you have to restrict yourself
to that place you need
if he goes beyond that he's committing sin
whether he likes it or he doesn't like
he's committing sin.
Why does he want to commit this sin?
That's why I said this is just blind
following
of the western,
what do you call, ideologies in Mhmm. Doing
things.
Sheikh, so we also mentioned right now the
the concept of the.
And since many people use this term
to justify certain actions,
could you give us quick guidelines on what
the term actually means,
and when should this concept take place? Yeah.
The is one of the misunderstood
most misunderstood
words, ex especially in this time of ours.
Zahid bought a car,
and, this car, you know, Zahid, another person
bought a car based on
a. When I ask him, he tells me
that. Mhmm. Lot of transportations are there.
And he has sometimes he even has some
car, but he looks at them as old
cars. Mhmm. You know? But then he calls
it.
Everyone has his own.
So that's why there has to be a
criteria and the definition given to us by
the sharia so that we will know what
to do in this regard.
The rura,
Islamically is a life threatening situation.
A situation whereby you need this to be
permissible for you, otherwise, you might lose your
life.
If it is not legal you might lose
your life
so we're talking about life and death
to save life Sharia says you can do
that which is haram to save your life
Yeah. That's the only the rule we know.
You have a a,
situation,
a step
lesser than the we call it. This
is a situation whereby if the thing is
not legal for you,
you will live a very terrible and difficult
life. You will not die most likely.
But life is going to be very tough
and sometimes it might be elevated to the
level of the rural. Mhmm. It started with
Hajab, but he moves the the world. For
instance, you are a surgeon.
You know, you want to do operation on
somebody.
Zaid, when you come to him and cut
that part of his stomach,
would he die?
Not necessarily.
Mhmm. Yeah. He can do cut
and then sway it back again.
But you can imagine how much this guy
is suffering. You need, like, 10, 20 people
to hold him in the way he will
not he cannot move at all. Mhmm. Yeah.
You can imagine how much he has gone
through. As I said, I witnessed a person
who went through this, you know,
It was a very terrible moment, and we
also don't think they will survive when we
see them.
They went through this surgery without giving them
the the Anesthesia. They they did, but it
doesn't it failed at the Mhmm. At one
point of the time.
So
the feeling and the suffering is is really,
really something that is not possible for them
to bear, but they can't do anything.
So so according based on this,
the
the scoreless set using those type of, drugs
to make the place numb you know, desensitize
the place so that doctors can finish their
things. And to avoid this possibility of death
is, necessary.
They said it's legal. It's halal.
Otherwise, the first place, those drugs are prohibited
Islamic. Mhmm. But the one that is used
by the doctors to avoid this big problem,
they say it's okay. This is the Hajar.
So these are there is a there is
it's just a tahsiniyat.
Things whether you have them or you don't
have them, you will live. But unfortunately, nowadays,
we take them as the daroora. Mhmm. Right.
Kamali yat. Things whether you have them, you
don't have them, you still survive only. So
the rura,
before
you use it
and legalize that which is haram, you must
fulfill 2 conditions.
Number 1 is
the fact that there is no halal alternative.
Number 2, you are sure that if you
use that
thing that is haram
that the ruler will be gone
If these conditions are not fulfilled, then the
the right can, you cannot legalize haram thing.
And there can be no room for doubting.
There is there can be no room for
any
any utilization of raksha here.
And if you go through these two conditions,
Having a situation of the ruler in our
time,
I don't say it's impossible, but almost impossible.
Almost impossible
Because
life has changed a lot in a way
alternatives are there. Mhmm. Everything they told you,
there is no alternative. When you just move
a bit and you push a bit, they
provide you another one, which is okay, but
they just don't want it because it's not
fancy.
Mhmm. Yeah. It's not good enough.
Yeah. They want that one because because because
of so many things.
So you must make sure that there is
no halal alternative, whether you like that halal
alternative or not, but it shouldn't exist
and secondly,
you must make sure that by taking that
thing which is Haram,
the situation of the ruler will be will
be gone completely.
Yeah. If
these two conditions are fulfilled, then a person
can use a haram thing.
Yeah. So if you sit down
and think of a situation where somebody can
take care of it, trust me, you might
not have this situation
at all.
Unless in a case whereby somebody is looking
for a loan and this loan is for
something that he is using to save a
life. Mhmm. Literally saving a life. If he
doesn't do, he will that person will die
or he will die. And he tried to
seek for the halal loan, but nobody's willing
to give except the haram 1. Yeah. These
are the situation that you can say, yes.
A person can go. But honestly speaking, Zahi,
when does a person get into this,
situation?
Mhmm.
Very difficult to find this, situation.
May Allah grant us good. So this is
the rurah Islamically, and these are conditions for
the rurah to take place. Other than that,
a person should just fear Allah
and be patient and do the right thing.
Mhmm.
For elaborating on that concept.
Moving forward to the next phase of our
discussion,
there are scenarios where the pregnancy is not
successful, and it leads to,
miscarriage or it leads to stillbirth.
How should
the family or the couple or even the
mother herself, how do you navigate the situation?
What do we look for?
They should be patient
and understand that Allah
knows exactly what he does, and they should
accept the decree and the color of Allah,
and do whatever is necessary Islamic leave. The
child started to have,
features,
you know,
features of human being. Then after he is
delivered,
I mean, the child is delivered, then they
have to go through the process. They pray
for him and bury him also. Also. They're
naming the child also. Some scholars said even
naming the child also is okay. It's fine
for them to give him a name,
but they go through the process.
Before this, they said it could be just
a flesh of meat. We just buy it
buy it anyhow. No need to pray for
it. No need to do anything else.
Yeah. As for
the the sister, if the nature of the
child human being, the nature of the human
being is,
what do you call, clear in that fetus
who which,
which died because of the miscarriage, then she
go through the process of the NFS issue
and all of these things. I don't know
whether you have you are planning to ask
this question. Inshallah, we will. We will. She
goes through the the process. Sheikh, but for
this features part that we mentioned over here,
is there, like, specific 80 days, 1 20
days? I'm not sure if we can do
that. They just say we just see if
the the features of human being are very
clear. Mhmm. They can understand that this is
human being. Mhmm. Yeah. In this case, we
have to go through the process.
Is there any specific,
guidance in terms of the burial of this
child,
or is it just a normal No. It
depends.
Either he is,
what do you call he's just in the
in the early stage, just a flesh of
meat or blood.
We just
dig a normal hole and just put him.
That's it. No prayer. No anything. Mhmm. But
if,
the features are there, then we have to
go with the process.
Yeah. Put him cover him, pray for him,
and then go and bury him. Mhmm. And
the will also everything happens.
Might not be if they can do the,
let's say their skin is there. They can
do the go
through the process and then bury. Mhmm.
Sure.
Sheikh, then we also mentioned right now the
concept of nifas, and that was our upcoming
question.
So how would we define nifas,
and then what would be the rulings associated
with it
in this scenario?
Nifas is
the blood that comes after delivery.
Yeah. That that period of time where the
woman will be bleeding,
this is what is called nifas.
Mhmm. It's usually
caused by the exit of the child. Yeah.
Sometimes it comes it begins 2, 3 days
before
the the delivery itself as long as it
is connected to the labor pain. Yeah. If
it is connected with the labor labor pain,
then, it is.
So a woman is supposed to treat it
just like the way she is treating the
height in terms of staying away from prayers
and fastings, you know,
and also husband cannot approach her during that
period of time.
And,
and,
she stays until the time she is PO.
According to the best opinion of the scholars,
it might it might it can go up
to 60 days and more than that, actually.
As long as it stopped and the blood
is still the same as the first one
she saw, then she has to stay.
Many scholars said,
after 40 days, then she has to
start praying.
But, Even if she's seeing the blood? Even
if she's seeing the blood. But the best
opinion according to the statement of Sheikh Hassan
Samiyeh and also this opinion of Imam Malik
and, I guess, Shafi'iyeh also, this is what
they are going with.
Nifas can go beyond that. There is no
place where the prophet
said, do not go beyond 40 days. Mhmm.
The the companion said, we used to stay
until 40 days.
Yeah. So
but I can't remember why they said even
if the blood is coming, we just, start
praying. So even Tamia says there is no
limit for it unless,
if it is continuous, it doesn't want to
stop, then we take it as is the
harbor. But as long as it stopped,
50, 40, 60. Says,
I know a woman who in Hanifas is
always 60 days. Souhanallah.
Yeah. 60 days. After 60 days, it stopped.
So on that basis, you're going to say
that after,
40 days, then the rest of the blood
is something else. Mhmm. While the same color,
the same nature, the same thing is coming,
you know. So that's why,
the best opinion is as long as the
blood stopped, we still take it as if
asked. But do we have, like, a minimum
period for it or no? Because we said
maximum would be anything. Period of it. Just
like height. Mhmm. Yeah. And height also, according
to the best of period, no no minimum
amount. Mhmm. Yeah. It can come very little
uncut,
and it can come,
can come just for a day and go
or a few minutes and then go.
It's okay. Once it's it goes,
then the woman is pure and clean. She
goes back to them. Mhmm. So this period
of postpartum bleeding on Yifas, we treat it
just like,
Haydah menstruation in terms of rulings of prayer
and fasting and everything? That's exactly that's it.
That's why if you study the fiqh, they
will tell you the hokumun Nifas, hokumul hide.
Mhmm. Hokumul of nifas is the same as
the height.
Mhmm.
Alright.
So moving forward now that we've covered this
period of,
delivery and childbirth and everything,
now coming to the child itself, the baby
itself,
what would be the best way of now
welcoming this child into the world with regards
to,
the azan and the ekama in the year?
I there's a bit of difference of opinion
there. So how do you, advise us to
tackle this?
Okay. First of all, as I said, they
should appreciate and celebrate
that happiness. You know? Celebration doesn't mean
inviting people and all of these things, but
just
show their happiness. You know? Because this is
really a big gift from Allah
for them. Mhmm.
And, also, the father should choose the best
place for the delivery of his child, especially
in our time. Mhmm. Do not choose a
place where your musical instruments are there and
all of these things, you know. Mhmm. Your
child will begin his life with music. That's
really not appropriate.
So he should choose a place where
if,
it is not Quran being played
and,
not nasheed,
but people are silent or just normal talking,
but not physical is true. So should we
play Quran while the delivery is happening? No.
We don't say we should play it.
But if you have the Quran being played
in the place, it's it's very fine. Mhmm.
It's very fine. But we don't say it
is a must or recommended that it should
that's why we have to have a sunnah
for this, and I can't remember any place
in the sunnah of Rasool Allah, sunnah where
this is recommended.
Yeah. But if we have the place and
I have a hospital, but they use Quran
all the time, that will be.
Mhmm. Yeah. In some hospital,
they have it in their computer. Right after
the child is delivered,
The computer
will play the adhan
like that.
I found it interesting because if, the the
father and the mother couldn't do the adhan,
you know, on time, but
at least the environment is not,
wrong environment. You know? They do not hear
bad things.
So the first thing after the child comes
is
to recite the other hand,
the other hand on the right ears,
and they are calmer. So they said, as
you mentioned, the majority of the scholars believe
that this adhan adhan is really important.
Abu al Qayim has justification for that. Although
there are some who are saying that they're
both hadis for the adhan and the akama
are not authentic, but I believe inshallah, at
least the adhan
is quite okay rather than the karma. So
they make a ban
on the ears of the child
and The left ear.
Right. Right. Yeah.
And it should be the first thing the
child hears.
Ibrahim says it's really important that the first
the child will be listening to
is the
the what do you call the other?
The name of Allah
He said because naturally the first thing that
goes into the brain of a child
remains.
So it's good for him to begin his
life with Allah in his brain
rather than those, instrument
and and things and,
issues of that nature. So they make the
other Sheikh, just pushing a bit more on
this part of azaan.
Right? Like many,
at times, doctors, they would say that the
ears of the child are very sensitive.
Don't give the azaan. Do it later.
So how would you advise giving the azaan
in the first place? No. We don't listen
to the doctors in this case because the
azaan I'm not giving azaan
You're not shouting.
Of inviting people. Mhmm. The doctor is talking
Mhmm. Next to the child. Mhmm. He should
also be silent because the ears are very
sensitive.
He is not. Mhmm. He talks and the
nurses also come sometimes they shout.
All of these things have been done, but
when it comes to applying
what is said to be the sunnah of
the prophet then they will start giving you
excuses and all of these things. Yeah. We
don't listen to them
at all. A person should just go and
give the other silence because he's just in
his next to his ears and talking very
soft and gently.
That's it doesn't affect the ears at all.
Very softly and gently.
Yeah. That's it. How does it affect the
ease? If it is affecting the ease, then
the room should be completely quiet,
and they shouldn't talk. The mother shouldn't talk.
Doctors shouldn't talk, you know, because it affects
the ease. But they are all talking. But
when it comes to making it, no. It
has this. It has that. You know? It's
misconception. Misconception.
I don't want to go with misconception. Oh,
they just don't wanna do it? Yeah. They
just
just
related to Islam.
You sticking with this thing they call tiny
tiny things is extremism.
Mhmm. Mhmm. Because I
Zaid, this is my belief in this, kind
of situation. It just
people think that all of these things, they
call them tiny and simple things, and you
are insistent to have them. Why? They're being
backward at times. Yeah. They've seen you like
that. Yeah. And that's it's not about misconception.
They understand what exactly it's all about, and
they know that, yes, this is what the
scholars have mentioned, but they don't want these
type of things
too. Yeah. Our medical system is liberal.
Mhmm. That's how I see it. It has
to be
in it fixed to go back to it
all
and original, you know, shape,
which is Islamic
kind of oriented thing, you know. Everything has
to be Islamic, and there will be no
harm.
I don't see connection between kufr
or sins and medicine.
Mhmm.
Yeah. Those things which they say,
they are not even in itifak.
You know many times you go to doctor,
this doctor will tell you this, and Allah
will tell you no, this is not good
for their life. They themselves also they have
khiraf, you know, amongst them.
Yeah. But they have a unity when it
comes to Islam, say, telling you something.
They get an idea. So why can't we
have our
virtues
incorporated in our medical system rather than taking
from from others?
So that's number 1, Adan. And you have
also the technique.
Sheikh for the Ikama? Are we going ahead
with Ikama?
I don't do the Ikama. Although, I know
majority of the scholars says both are okay.
Because,
they see that hadith to be authentic. So
Azan in the right and the kama in
the left. In the left. This is what
they they are mentioning.
But,
the the other,
it is a bit more stronger than the.
Mhmm. Yeah. The Haris of the Adan are
more stronger than the Haris of the.
Yeah. So after that, then, is,
the technique issue.
The boy before he takes everything,
it's good if there is a tamar
to chew it properly.
Father or the mother chew it properly and
then put it in the the mouth of
the child. Chew it properly really properly. Mhmm.
Mhmm. Yeah. Because the system is not stable
yet for him to have a dry tamar
to eat to eat them, you know. Treat
properly and take from the saliva and put
in the mouth of the child.
I prefer the parent to do it themselves,
not taking
the child to anybody.
And it's mixing of saliva and all of
the other stuff as well. This is the
reason why I'm saying I don't prefer somebody
to do it. Yeah. I prefer
because I don't
remember when they used to take their children
to Rasulullah,
I'm sorry, to other than
to Rasulullah. Yes. But to Abu Bakr, I
can't remember a single narration Mhmm. That says
they used to take them to the companions
to make the tannik for them.
Interesting.
So, we mentioned dates. Does it have to
be dates necessarily, or can we,
do something like honey or anything sweet? Tamur
is better. Mhmm.
Ilkaim says if we couldn't find tamur, then
any natural sweet.
Mhmm. So natural sweet, honey then? Honey. Although
honey, doctors nowadays would tell you it's too
strong for the stomach of the child. Mhmm.
I don't know what is their base, but
this is what they are saying. Interesting. Even
in Zamzam, they don't agree with that.
My friend, Brooke, this is he says all
of my children in Saudi, I gave them
zamzam and nothing happened to any one of
them. When they were born immediately? And and
no, not immediately, but he give because doctors
will say the first 6 months, the child
doesn't need water. Mhmm. Yeah. This is true.
The mother can keep giving the child milk,
no water, no any other food except milk
because everything is in that milk. Mhmm. Everything.
It's a complete meal. Mhmm. Yeah. And it's
better for the child also for the 1st
6 months also to be on that. So
they would tell you that, giving him water
might not be good for
the body.
So he says no. Except Samsung,
And he was right because Ismail was a
baby,
very fresh baby.
Yeah. And,
he he was fed dzamzam
throughout his life Mhmm. And nothing happened
to him. Now you're saying that he was
fed dzamzam directly, or did the, the mother
drink the zamzam and then it got transferred
via the milk? Yeah. It could be, but,
she she drank and then,
give it to to him. Unless if we
have
a confirmation that she doesn't share the water
with Mhmm. With him until after the 6th
month, then we can claim that, no. She
waited until after the 6th month. So Then
I will raise my rest my case.
Just say to the doctors, yes, sir. And
we vote that. I personally, with my kids,
I don't give them water.
At Zamzama, I'm not
exposed to it. I don't have it here
in Malaysia. And also even if I have
it, I have doubt whether it's correct or
wrong because a lot of cheatings are there.
So my children, all of them, I just
stick to the milk of the mothers. That's
it. Until after this,
6 months, and then they will start drinking
water slowly slowly and taking some other food.
Mhmm. So is there any other stuff, and
during this period of time, like, we have
said to do the taneek?
So
next would, of course, be the naming of
the child itself. Should we do it on
the same day as Name of the child
is born? Naming of the child can happen
even
before the delivery date. Any agreeing upon name?
Yeah. And he can name the child. Name
the child. Okay. Give him a a name.
My child that will come, his name is
Ibrahim.
Mhmm. Zahid Abu Bakr Osman Mhmm. Before he
comes. Right after he comes, you should give
him a name. Mhmm. And it's also another
dimension because naming a child is really important
in a person to choose the best
name.
He should it's a part of the right
of a child that the name that will
be given to him is the best name.
Mhmm. Best name means good name.
And the best name to be given to
a child is Abdullah or Abdulrahman,
as the prophet
said.
So and a person should try his best
to choose a name that has good meaning.
Yeah. That has good meaning
in every place.
Yeah. Because name has impact on the person.
Yeah. So it's a jalima. It's a crime
being committed against the children when we name
them
Mhmm. With names which are wrong. Mhmm. Wrong
names. It might affect their life in the
future.
Prophetess Allah also may use to change names
if they are not appropriate.
Yeah so since this is the case then
at the first place we shouldn't give the
name in the wrong way.
We should give the correct name.
Alright. So this is a right of a
child to be given a good good name
by the by the parent.
So and then,
after the day number 7, also, we
we do the
the help. We shave the help. We will
read that point, Shashi. We have a few
questions here already. What happens after the Yeah.
So when we are naming the child, right,
so
who has the right to name the child?
Because usually, you would hear of many fights
happening. It's the grandfather's coming in, the father's
family is coming in, the mother herself is
saying, I wanna name something else.
How do we navigate this? The parent
is is their right. Mhmm. This is their
child. Definitely. They do have a right to
name the child Mhmm. Without consulting anyone.
Although if,
if the father or the mother have interest
in this, then I will advise them to
Mhmm.
To go with the interest of the parent.
But if the parent did not show any
interest, this is their absolute right to name
the child, the name they want. Mhmm. The
father and the mother.
When it comes to naming the children as
well, like we mentioned, the best of names
for the males would be Abdullah and Abdul
Rahman. Mhmm. What would you suggest for the
females?
Names of
the the great sisters.
Some scholars said Amatullah,
Amatul Rahman,
but I don't have any evidence for for
this.
But they are saying this because any name
that is,
what do you call you attach it
to being a slave of Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala should be the the best name. And
this is good. But to say that it's
a sunnah to call her,
or this and that, And because we don't
see the daughters of the companions doing this
and that. And if this is what to
be done, I believe they will be rushing
to this.
Yeah. But they have a lot of Abdulrah
Abdullah Abdulrahman.
Mhmm. So,
if you ask me what is the best
name to be chosen, I will say the
name of the household of the Prophet sallallahu
alaihi wa sallam.
The family members of Rasool Allah sallallahu either
from his wives or from the
the daughters.
Yeah. Or the names of the companions. Mhmm.
But these are very straightforward Islamic and Muslim
names. Mhmm. Yeah. You come and hear Aish,
Fatima,
Khadija.
You get it. You already know that these
are Muslims' names.
You hear,
what are their name?
Rokayya. Zaynab. Zaynab. You know? These are all
straightforward, you know, that these are Muslim names.
Yeah. But,
other than that, it's okay. Any name that
has good meaning is okay. But it's good
as a Muslim to have this, you know,
I like swimming in the house of the
prophet out
of the hope that inshallah, these people they
might pick up from the attitude of those
those great, sisters, Asiya, Mariam, Khadija, Faldima.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it is natural. I will prefer a
person to swim in that one. Not to
skip them until they finish first and then
start to go into
That's a lot of skipping to do. Yeah.
That's we will call him an animal. Yeah.
That's what they said. If you have a
lot of children, it's like animal. What is
that?
Alright. So I think now we've reached the
point that, Sheikha, cut you off before,
the point of of
the child.
What would you advise with regards to it?
Yeah. This is,
according to the best opinion of the the
scholars, it's to be
slaughtered, a person to slaughter the akaika as
long as he's able to do that. The
prophet
said a child will be detained,
you know, because of his Akega. It's like
Raan. You know, you give your house to
get the money
as a collector.
So that house will be kept by the
by the creditor.
So
he is going to keep that house until
the time you pay him the money. Mhmm.
So your child also is like that.
So you are restricting him from getting a
lot, you know, from Allah
and so many things. Allah knows what exactly
are they until the time the Akeka has
been done.
So the has to be done for the
child. If it,
is for a male, then, we need 2
sheep, the prophet
said, and the female, one sheep.
Yeah. While it is justification,
Allah
through the prophet
told us this is what we should do.
Not because the boy is better than the
girl. No. Not at all. This is just
the system how Allah
made it for the boy,
2 sheep or the girl.
One one sheep is is enough.
So this is the and it should be
slaughtered, and a person slaughtered
the in the name of
Allah. And his intention is this is so
and so on. That's it. Intention is so
and so.
Whether he mentioned that this is a for
this and that or he doesn't, but the
intention should be, this is the of so
and so.
Slaughter, and then they eat the meat and
distribute the meat also to
the, the need needy people. Sheikh, but wasn't
one sheep slaughtered for the birth of either
Hassan or Hussain
instead of 2?
No. Even if this is authentic that the
prophet
did and that one, we follow his command.
Mhmm. They say when you have a command
from the prophet
and also action, we go with the command
cause action
might be a has
specifically given to the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam
which the ummah is not included in it.
Mhmm. So the command says shatani.
We go with the
2 shat. Say again. That if it is
authentic that the prophet to
only one for each and every one of
them. Otherwise, we just go with the command.
In both sit situations, we just go with
the command, which is to slaughter 2 sheep
for a boy and one sheep for for
a girl. But what if the parents don't
have enough money to slaughter 2?
They just want they can't if they can't
even slaughter 1. I don't know. That's it.
They do it whenever they can do. Some
scholars said they do it after 1 week.
No. No. I'm sorry. After the next week,
that's after 14 days.
K? And others call us, I'm sorry. They
said if they couldn't do it, after 2
weeks, they do it after 3 weeks. Mhmm.
So 14th
or 20 21st.
So multiples of 7. Yeah. And then after
that, they just do it any other day
without
thinking of, what do you call,
the the
taking that kind kind of consideration of 7
days. Mhmm. But it has to be done.
It has to be done. Whenever they can
afford doing it, they just do. Mhmm. Yeah.
And also, that's one thing also that, we
need to address here, when to do the
Akeca. Mhmm. Yeah. The Akeca was supposed to
be done on 7th.
Usually, many countries,
we do the Akeca on 8th.
Mhmm. For instance, the child is born on,
Sunday. Today is Sunday. Right? When do you
do the clicker?
Sunday. Saturday. Saturday. Okay. Yeah. If you do
it on Sunday, that's day number 8. So
you're counting, like, Badmogarib Yeah. As the day?
Let's say he was born
on Sunday. That means before Maghrib. Mhmm.
If Maghrib comes It's already. Already already Monday.
Then you say he's born on Monday. Mhmm.
So he was born on Sunday.
You get it? So that's day number 1.
Monday,
Tuesday,
Wednesday,
Thursday,
Friday,
Saturday. That's number 7. Mhmm. But, usually, many
places, we do it on the 8th
because we start counting start counting from the
next day. Mhmm. But what happened to the
day he was born? That was his first
day. Even in his birth, you calculate that
day. You don't skip it.
You count it also. So,
we do it,
on 7th.
So if it is if he was born
on Tuesday, that's mean the is on Monday.
If he was born on Monday, that's mean
the is on Sunday.
Like that. Yeah. So So this, there's a
correction that because I know
many countries, the is being done on the
8th of,
8th day of the delivery. Mhmm.
Sheikh Zain, now the Akika, the the animal
that has been slaughtered Mhmm. We mentioned about
dividing or distributing the meat. Yeah. How do
we dis divide or distribute this, and can
the family of the child also take from
the meat? Yeah. They should eat actually from
it at this celebration and share with others.
Mhmm. Yeah. They can eat it all Mhmm.
Without giving anyone. It's fine. Mhmm. It's good
for them to give it to other people.
Let them share, and they will make dua
for them, possibly. Mhmm. Yeah.
The reason I'm asking is because, like, you
know, during for kurban, you usually get the
breakdown of 1 third, 1 third, 1 third.
Yeah. We don't apply that over here. It
it does because they said is just like
over here. Mhmm. That's why they talk about
over here. And then when they come to
the, they would tell you it takes, like,
the over here. Mhmm. Yeah. It's good to
share with
anyway, you can give it in charity, all
of it, and you can eat all of
it, and you divide. The best is to
divide. Mhmm. Yeah.
So
what we do also is correct.
You cook the meat and invite people to
come for
small.
Mhmm. That's okay.
Sheikh, so we mentioned right now that the
7th day is for the.
Mhmm. What about shaving the hair? Shaving the
hair also is 7th days.
Before after.
It's good to no. Not necessarily when. It's
a person to do it whenever he can.
It's good to wait until day number 7
where the head is a bit stronger. Because,
you know, when the child comes, it's a
bit soft and fragile. Fragile. It's not good
for you to bring the the blade and
started. It will be a bit difficult.
So it's good to wait for the child
to reach 7
days after becoming strong, and he sees things.
He knows what he's doing, you know Mhmm.
Somehow.
And then, you come and shave there.
Yeah.
The father should do what the mother should
do. Yeah. It's simple. You know, they have
those,
shavers,
you know,
it's very simple.
Yeah. They just have to be a bit,
careful. But those ones, since they are designed
in a way that they shouldn't cut a
person,
you shouldn't get injured.
We used to do with the blade. For
that one, you have to be extra careful
to make sure you don't catch the baby.
But now since you have the other thing,
you just make sure that you put enough
water and, the soap, and it will be
so soft and gentle.
And the baby will not usually will not
cry because we just like you are,
scratching his head gently.
Mhmm. Yeah.
So now, what do we do with the
hair? Do we bury it? Do we throw
it? No need to you just throw it
away. But you weigh it and, give the
weight,
the value of the weight,
silver, you know. Not gold. And not gold.
But you can do with the gold. It's
okay. It's fine. Mhmm. That's,
of course, a better since you're giving it
in charity. Mhmm. The more you give, the
better
the reward is. So,
the prophet
asked,
Fatima
to give silver Mhmm. Dirham.
Get it?
1 dirham or part of the dirham because,
you know, the the hair, if you wait,
is very
very light. Mhmm. Yeah.
So it just give the estimate.
You know? You can just have the estimate
of the the weight.
If you can weigh it and then give
the estimate in the currency and in the
money and then give it to somebody else.
Mhmm.
And does this ruling of, the shaving of
the hair, does it apply only to the
males or other females included in this as
well? This is also a controversial matter. Mhmm.
Many scholars said only the male. Mhmm. Many
other scholars said no. Both, you should do
it because it does benefit.
When you remove the first hair that comes,
the next one is fresher, stronger Mhmm. Healthier
also.
That's why they said it's applicable to both
of them. Mhmm. And especially knowing that the
prophet
says almulud. Almulud is a a child Mhmm.
Who's delivered regardless of the gender. Mhmm. So
they said both are okay, female and a
male.
You get it? She might need it more
than him. If this theory is fact because
many of them says yes. It's true. The
hair that the baby comes with is not
healthy hair. Mhmm. That's why across the time,
it might be going out by itself. So
shave it and the good one. The fresh,
the best one will come. So she might
need it because it's part of the beauty.
The girls, they have long hair than the
than the boys, and she might need it
more than the boy. So that's why the
opinion that I take is one that says
both of them could be shaved. Mhmm. Yeah.
But the controversy remains. If you see somebody
who is not shaving the hair of his
daughter Mhmm. That's fine.
Yeah. If he follows that opinion, that's also
fine. Great scholars have said that. Hypnotamin
and many others, you know, they said that
we don't shave the the hair of the
the girl.
Well, you're sticking towards the original ruling regards
to females. Okay? Both of them both of
them could be shaved.
Yeah. Mhmm. If
yeah. Go ahead, please. As long as the
person is I mean,
convinced that benefits,
is better for him to shave the hair.
Mhmm.
Inshallah.
I was reading this, narration where they were
mentioning in the days of the Jahiliyah,
after
the slaughtering the aqika or the the animal,
they used to take, some blood and put
it on the head of the child. Yeah.
So after Islam, some of the sahaba, instead
of the blood, they applied saffron on the
head of the child. Mhmm. Would we consider
doing the same thing even today? If it
is authentically
attributed to them
We don't need to do it. We don't
need to replace what is wrong by doing
something else.
So do we say that that was a
cultural thing? My my ad advice
is to stick to that which was done
by the prophet
to Al Hassan al Hussein. Mhmm. If he
did that with them, we just go with
that. If not, then a person should stay
away from it because if it is good,
Rasulullah
will be the first to apply it on
his grandchildren. Mhmm. Yeah.
I really want a Muslim to always try
to see what exactly was done by Rasulullah
and just do that. Mhmm. Yeah.
But if you're saying, even from a cultural
perspective, like, that was something culturally that they
did, or maybe today people might do something
different. They might apply coho or they might
apply some turmeric on the baby.
That would be fine. Right? Because it's a
cultural thing. Into the belief Mhmm. If it
is attached to certain beliefs. Mhmm. Yeah. That's
why we have to be very careful. Why
do we need to do it at the
1st place? What is the benefit of doing
it? Mhmm. Yeah. If there is a benefit
in doing it and it is not related
to any belief, then it's fine.
Mhmm. But if it is related to their
beliefs,
then it's wrong for a person to do
it.
Yeah. That's why I'm saying whether that is
a culture or there is no culture,
trust me. I love always to follow what
Risulullah Soma did with his family and his
soul. Mhmm. Yeah. Because those one,
they became the leaders of the whole. You
know? Mhmm. And, what
suit them
should be enough for us. Definitely.
Definitely.
So just to summarize what we've discussed till
now. So we are saying that the very,
naming of the child can happen even before
birth. Yeah. And after birth, we can do
it on the same day as well. Yeah.
Akika and the shaving of the head, we
leave it till day 7. Yeah.
So now the next question would be regarding
circum circumcision. Mhmm. When do we go for
circumcision?
This one,
Annie, there is no time for it. Mhmm.
Also after the day number 7.
A person shouldn't do it before.
Mhmm. And
I believe it is better
for the child
to be,
what do you call it, giving respite until
he reaches,
1 year,
2 years, you know, is good
rather than in the very early days. You
know? Mhmm. I come and cut him. You
know?
I don't call it injustice, but
I think it's waiting for the
child is,
is better at least to grow a bit.
1 year is okay. Mhmm. And then half
years is okay. 2 years after 2 years
is really fine.
Because
the reason why we need to do it
early,
it is to avoid psychological pain. Mhmm. Because
when a person is injured, there are 2
things,
psychological,
what do you call sickness and pain, and
the physical one. Mhmm.
So if you,
do the khetan, the circumcision for the boy
when he is, let's say, 5 years old.
Mhmm. Psychologically, he's disturbed. How does he he
goes to his friends and now Mhmm.
This can affect the the process of healing,
the healing process. Mhmm.
Then if it is supposed to heal in
10 days, it might go to 1 month.
Mhmm.
I get it. So they said to avoid
this, it's better to do it at a
time when he doesn't know what is that.
To him, it's just normal,
You know? So that's,
1 year is good. 1 and a half
years because,
still the children you know, after 2 years,
he's still still even taking the the milk.
That means very young. He doesn't know what
the hour is all about Mhmm. And things
and that. So if you do the khitan,
he doesn't suffer psychologically.
Mhmm. He just a physical
suffering which insha'Allah,
would not hinder the process of the healing.
So that's why I always pray for
since there is nothing specific mentioned by the
prophet about the time,
and, in the past they used to delay.
They don't do it very early. Mhmm. They
used to delay. I can't remember the text,
but it is mentioned that they used to
delay. They don't just do it quickly. Yeah.
So it's better for a person to wait
for the child Mhmm. Until 1 year, 2
years, and then do it.
I think, Shaykh But they have to be
very also careful these days Mhmm. Yeah, to
take him to the person who knows how
to do it so that he will not
need to fix it in the future. Mhmm.
Because sometimes some people, they had to go
and fix it in the future because it
was done in the wrong way. Mhmm.
So I think we were a bit specific
when we said circumcision for the the males.
So, what about the females? Do we don't
go for circumcision?
It's,
first of all, this issue is a very
sensitive matter nowadays, you know. People,
there are some people who think that this
is an offense
and a crime against a woman to circumcise
her. Mhmm. You know,
and tell her that she should take and
cut a little bit. Mhmm.
What happens according to what they have mentioned
is that,
Zahid's sisters are created in a way
that thing if it is not been cut,
it might grow
in a way it touches the,
what do you call the clothes or whatever
she's wearing.
It can provoke a lot of desire, which
might not be good for her
in the future and good for the husband
who is going to be remaining with her
because he has he has limit. If she
doesn't have,
he has limit.
Not everyone can have relationship with a with
a woman twice at a time. Mhmm. Mhmm.
I have to wait for a day and
he has to wait for a longer time
for for him to come back.
Sisters are different.
Different from the from the husband.
So
if he is going to marry with those
kind of sisters,
that marriage can face a problem. You know,
I personally I receive a complaint.
The husband, his complaint is he can't,
fulfill the need of his wife because almost
every time she needs him.
Him. So it was difficult for him because
it's not normal.
It's just not normal at all.
So they said if it is kept, it
might lead to this.
You get it? At the same time, if
you cut it a lot,
it might lead to woman not having a
desire completely.
2 extremes. Yeah. 2 extremes.
Whoever married her is gonna suffer. Mhmm. This
one, the second one, I have no doubt
that this is injustice
and a crime if somebody does it come,
I mean, intentionally. Mhmm. It's an injustice
and a crime against a woman.
The first one is okay because it doesn't
affect her life. Come abs I mean, completely,
it doesn't affect her.
And in fact, actually, it moderate
her desire and bring it in the proper
way, which she will appreciate, and the husband
also will appreciate it. Mhmm. Yeah. I get
it. So being in the middle,
what this is what the prophet,
sallallahu alaihi salamat, proposed, and he told the
one who does it, This is how she
is supposed to do it. He said,
do not go deep. You know? Why? Because
it is going to affect
the the woman throughout her life.
You get it. So it is there in
the sunnah of the prophet
approved. And according to the best opinion of
the scholars,
it is must have
for the boys is wajib, but for the
sisters, it must have that's the majority's view.
There are some scholars who see it as
wajib also as as the way it is
with the with the brothers.
So I believe it is a must hap
insha Allah.
However,
in this time of hours, I really believe
that a purse a father has to be
very careful.
If he decide to go for it for
it, he really need to be very careful.
Otherwise, we have heard in some nations in
the subhanallah,
they are really committing crime
against their daughters. Mhmm. Because she will become
somebody who doesn't have desire in life.
And this is, taking her out of her
own nature,
depriving her from what Allah
gave her unnecessarily.
So
a person should be very careful to make
sure that he takes his daughter if he
decide to go for it, take his daughter
to somebody who is an expert,
to assist her who is an expert in
doing it and also insist that it should
be done according to the way the prophet
prescribed.
Yeah. If this is not to be found
or a person is in doubt, I really
advise him not to go for it.
Just leave it. Yeah.
Be the life as well. Yeah. I think
the issue here arises is because of,
the some of the cultural practices that people
do where they go for the complete,
circumcision,
and that's what people would call the FGM
FGM or the female genital mutilation. Mhmm. And
they associate cultural practices
with Islam just because a Muslim might have
done it. Yeah. So they say all Muslims
do this. Yeah. But that's not true. That's
not true. Islam never advised a person to
go for this. And in fact, Rasool Allah
found the Arabs doing it actually for long.
He just told them not to do it
in the wrong way.
Yeah. Because it benefits. Circumcision actually benefit. We're
doing it because of the benefit.
So it benefits her also.
But it not doing it is not as
bad as it is in the case of
a boy. Mhmm. That's why for the boy
is watching. But for them, it just must
have happened.
If a person doesn't do it, he doesn't
get sin. Mhmm. According to the opinion of
the vast majority of the scholars.
So Muslims should be,
what do you call I mean,
fair to everyone. Mhmm. And the way you
want us to be fair to you, you
know, you should also be fair to Islam.
Many practices that people are doing, Islam never
ask people to do that, but they just
do. But unfortunately when we come, we attach
those practices to Islam.
Islam came with respect in a woman and
no place where a woman can get respect
other than Islam. That's the only solution she
has.
History confirmed that only Islam liberated women. And
up to date, this is what Islam does,
the western community.
They actually
humiliated women
more than,
more than the way the Arabs used to
do.
Humiliation that woman is receiving nowadays is worse
than the one that are In the name
of liberation. In the name of liberation. Right?
Because those one, they were killing
their daughters
out of the fear of,
what do you call,
our humiliation
Mhmm. And disrespect in the future,
which is absolutely
wrong.
But nowadays,
we are killing that honor.
In the past, they killed to protect the
honor, but nowadays we are killing the honor
that the sisters are having
and reducing them to toys.
That's just a woman doesn't have value nowadays.
Although they call upon, yeah, woman had this
and that, but these are all lies.
They don't have values up to date. You
know?
The value they have is when they remain
in Islam, and this is when Islam respect
them and see them as human beings, not
toys.
Yeah.
So
no injustice is celebrated Islamically. All of these,
practices that people are doing against women, Islam
is not part of it at all. Yeah.
So circumcision
is part of the sunnah of the prophet
if it is to be done in a
correct way. There are millions of sisters who
went through a circumcision, and there is no
problem in their life, and their desire never
get affected because of this. Mhmm. Why? Because
it was done correctly
and the way it benefited them rather than
harming them.
Those who are committing crime against their daughters
should be responsible, not Islam. Mhmm. Because Islam
advised them not to do it in the
wrong way.
They do it when they know how to
do it and they do it in the
correct way.
Moving to the last stage of our discussion
for today,
how would we navigate
breastfeeding?
What would be the timeline of this? And
do we have any specific guidelines associated with
it?
Breastfeeding is natural.
So a mother is supposed to breastfeed her
child and not to take the child to
any other person to breastfeed him. Although it
is halal to do that, but it is
not
recommended for a person to do it,
because sometimes the baby, many times, actually
inherited values and manners from the breast. Mhmm.
So it's very dangerous if it is not,
I mean, if it is not necessary for
a child to be breastfed fed by any
other anyone other than the mother. So the
mother should be patient
and breastfeed her child, and the best,
duration is, 2 years to the patient up
to 2 years. After 2 years and the
work being in process should take place because
at that time, the child doesn't benefit from
the from the milk. Mhmm. It doesn't benefit
him that much, so she should win him.
Not Wajid. She can go beyond that, but
it doesn't make sense, you know.
She she can go up to, 2 years,
and this is the best,
breastfeeding.
And, after that, then the child should be
should be winning. Yeah. And,
this is really important because I think even
scientifically, it is proven that the most important,
food is the milk of the mother. Mhmm.
Doctors always advise milk milk milk. And subhanAllah,
I found it interesting,
you know, because
it's just like jointis.
The jointis, one of the,
medicines for this sickness, which usually children have
it,
is
the milk of the mother.
Doctors would say she should give a lot
of milk. Give him a lot of milk.
It helps a lot also to remove
whatever he has insha'Allah.
That's why also
during the period of breastfeeding, she should always
remember that there is somebody. It's easy. The
mother will be having flu.
Just wait for the child. The next day,
you will see the child also most likely
having flu. Mhmm.
Whatever sheikh sickness she has,
you might see if this sickness could be
transferred, you might see the baby also getting
the same thing. Mhmm. So that's why she
has to be patient not to eat everything.
There are things which she can tolerate, but
the baby cannot tolerate.
So she stays away from them because he
might she can get affected and get into
trouble, but the baby's,
trouble is going to be tough.
So that's why she should understand what to
eat, focus on healthy food, not junk food,
and Mhmm. Yeah.
Not fast food. Eat natural
good food for the sake of the baby.
Mhmm. Once she graduates, you know, and win
the child, then now she comes back to
her herself not to take, like, the
the liberalist when they say the child doesn't
have a right to, you know, instruct the
mother on how to live, what to eat.
These are all
any I call them stupidities, honestly honestly speaking.
The first place, if she thinks that she's
going to have this authority, why does she
bring the child first?
She shouldn't do the thing which will bring
the child because she knows naturally since she's
she won't be if she has a relationship
with the husband, she's gonna have a child.
So if she knows that this is who
she is, the child has to follow
whatever she wants, not what he needs, then
she shouldn't bring the child at the first
place. You know? Mhmm. And, unfortunately, may Allah
grant us good and toffee. Amen. So this
is what I will say concerning this, matter
as I hit that. A woman should be
very careful
on what to eat and, what to drink
for the sake of the the child and
the period of the breast feeding should, be
up to 2 years, if possible. If not,
she can do it up to 1 year
or less than that if there is a
need for that.
Mhmm. She we mentioned that it's not preferred
for another woman to breastfeed the child. Mhmm.
But when we're looking at the the seerah
of the prophet, we
see that it was an an established practice
for the whole city
to give out the children,
let's say, to the tribe of Banus Ad
and the others
to get breastfed by the women who are
living on the outskirts because they were better.
How would we reconcile here?
Yeah. That's it remains like this. You know,
these are the practices of the jahiliyah which
are correct and okay. Mhmm. Okay. That's why
Islam,
conform and accept it.
But the question is, after that, which one
among the children of the the prophet that
was sent to somebody?
Mhmm. Nobody.
We did not hear that the companions used
to send their children to others after Islam
came. But the system remains as a legal
thing to be done and having to be
done It has principles and rules what happens
after that has been done. You You know,
we have all of these, but is it
preferable?
If it is a pre,
something that is preferred, then we must have
the prophet,
the companions also sending their kids to others.
But I can't trace this in the history
of the prophet
after he was given the prophecy and
and there is Allah. You get it? So
that's why I said it's not preferable to
a house to take him to others, especially
when you have the inheritance.
Yeah. But there are circumstances,
the baby lost his parent. Mhmm. What do
we do now? We look for somebody to
breastfeed him.
It doesn't matter who this person is, but,
the best is to look for somebody who
is decent,
good man well mannered. You know?
And then we give her the child. Mhmm.
So even if he's going to get values,
there will be good values being transferred to
him. Mhmm.
I think, Sheikh, with that, it brings us
to a wrap for today's discussion.
Any parting words or advices that you would
like to give?
Well, I,
there's nothing other than, being patient
and also following all the advice, that, we
have mentioned in,
in this,
what do you call,
sitting of hours,
husband and wife to a patient, and to
try to do right the right thing.
Yeah. Especially during the pregnancy and also when
the child comes, try to make sure that
things have been placed in the proper order.
Yeah. So that,
they will not regret in the in the
future. But these are moments which cannot be
repeated. You cannot bring them back and fix
them. Yeah. So my advice is to study,
you know, how to take care of
a child and how to live as spouses
during the pregnancy and also when a child
comes, how to deal with the situation
until the tie the time the child can
start taking care of himself by himself.
Yeah. Yeah. Lots more to the ground is
good. You know? Amin Amin.
Alright. Everyone for tuning in. With this, we
wrap up,
today's session that we discussed with regards to
pregnancy as well as childbirth.
We've done a few other sessions before this.
They would be linked in the description. I
would like to invite everyone to please go
ahead and look at all of those sessions
as well.
And we ask Allah to accept this gathering
of benefit and vigor, and will allow us
to continue this,
series that we are ongoing.
We've titled it the a to z of
Turbiyyah.
We've reached,
maybe b or c for now, but we
have quite a lot to go. The actual
journey of Tarbia just begins. So make dua
that Allah facilitates and accepts this work from
the team. There are so many people behind
the scenes,
facilitating this.
So please remember the whole team in your
see you in the next session.
see you in the next session.