Tap into your potential – 11.04.2013
Channel: Edris Khamissa
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Salam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuhu
Welcome to Al mushrif on radio Islam international it is Thursday morning and being a Thursday inshallah Aziz, we're going to be joined by our guest, brother Idris camisa. inshallah, as he is just after the break, what we're going to be discussing today is tips on how to live a happy life, how to live a happy life, how to live a life in which we feel that we are fulfilled, we feel happy, we feel
good about ourselves good about our environment, part of our situation about the circumstances, how to live that happy life, is it achievable? Is it something that we can endeavor for? Is it something that we can ever get? And this is what we'll be discussing in our program with some essential hazards that will come up just after the break any feedback? And any question that you may have to ask is this for me, so please, SMS 0731738461 and you can join in the discussion and 118541548 coming up just after the break, we'll be joined by James Comey Sana Stay tuned. In keeping with its proud heritage of reliability and durability Mota deal now offers you the best of small baggies that
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He knows he will have
to hate and the super of this will come into this is what you have been avoiding. And most of this is true and it will arrive. Even though you try to avoid it. It will happen and it will happen to everyone. It happened to us. It was
a pot filled with water. He would dip his hands in the water and then he would wipe his face and he was c'est la ilaha illAllah in an mot de cerca de la ilaha illAllah there is agony of death. There's super even Rasul Allah Azza wa sallam was feeling
17 minutes after 11 Welcome back to my stick on radio Islam international and a very very warm welcome on this cold iced tea. I wonder how it is in Durban to Brother Idris camisa salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.
But the libre capto Durbin is cool, not cold is beautiful. Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah How are you keeping it under law I'm doing good. You know, it just you know, in life.
All of us have to take stock of ourselves in terms of our spiritual well being, of physical well being our mental well being. And, you know, we have an opportunity every day to think about it, but sometimes we get caught up in a rat race. Caught up working 24 hours a day for material things.
But then you realize that none of that really joy. Not not even give joy to people around you. Yeah. Yes, definitely it is by looking at the school weather looking at the winter season coming in, we need some reason to be happy, we need some reason, in some purpose to live our lives for. And this is what we're gonna be discussing today inshallah, how to inshallah
II know, manana, the whole thing is, is
that many people that have come and gone
and the only Allah knows what the condition is,
but many of them perhaps would have had some very serious regrets in their life.
And it's important for us to take stock for life and, and there are things that we can do practically, you know, to make sure that we are a, we have a positive attitude, we have a degree of tranquility, but what we need to know, and just the bottom line, the bottom line is nothing, nothing will happen except the will of Allah.
And that Allah will test us. And as we are told, it'll be hard to make these ease. Sadly, because of the weakness of our human, we only see Allah's mercy when things are going well for us.
But when things are not going too well, we forget that we need to also be strong in conviction and faith, knowing full well, like the wintry season, it's a season it will go away, when the darkness in the sun would rise in the morning, and so on and so forth. So I think it's about essentially about our attitude, and more than anything else, you know, you know, I inshallah, share with you about 15 things that we can do. And the first fundamental thing that is very, very critical, is that we
need to surrender to Allah. And many of us speak about surrendering in a very different way. What do we really understand by surrendering to Allah? What do we understand by who is Allah, Allah is the control of everything, every limb, of your body, every cell of your body, every need, everything you see around you, you know, it's all under the control of Allah, our
and that's important that we need to do that surrender ourselves to Allah, surrendering ourselves to Allah subhanho wa Taala. And that is obviously the first step in finding happiness. Because absolutely 100 because you know what I mean? If we just pause for a moment, like, even my conversation with you, your involvement radius, now my conversation with you today,
none of it can happen except for the realm of under nothing, nothing. And I remember, you know, my friend, shake, I'm abubaker. One day he was telling me, he says, He believes he will, when I whenever when you put the key to the door, and you open the door and say this main line of maneuver here, because even the act that might appear trivial to you, is, again cannot be done without Alice will.
And that is very important. It's about how we, as Omar can be aligned to our lives, so that we begin to see the world in a different perspective. We do not look at the world from a very selfish, narrow perspective. We understand who we are, and what our purpose
Yes, it is, by firstly recognizing Allah subhanho wa Taala and remaining obedient to Allah subhanaw taala This is the basis of happiness, and the owner of happiness is Allah subhanaw taala the creator of happiness is the controller of happiness is Allah subhanho wa Taala gives it to whomsoever He wants, in whatever measure, he wants, also,
the absolute mowlana
that come to mind, I heard of a very pious scholar while she was giving a lecture and someone
tweets here and they said that you're we've got news your wife passed away
June and the country does talk and you finish. So they will surprise you know, he said how can I fight to the Allah the Creator, your belong to me? How can I fight you
Of course, I'll miss my wife, you know,
grace for her. And this is an attitude of people that reach a higher place. And it's very, very important for us to move to a higher spiritual plane in order to improve ourselves due to our spirituality, because I know there may be some cynic at home sitting at home. And he might be saying, you know what, maybe it's easy for you breezed by and Milena to speak, you know, they don't go through a problem they go through, you know, that's the point. You know, I find some of the most positive people are people that go through many, many challenges. Yet some of the biggest moans and groans are people that go through, you know, some, like kids or some change in the circumstances,
and they for the rest of the life, they become despondent and depressing.
No, no, no, or what we don't want to go on to the causes of despondency the causes of depression because our our program today is all about happiness is all about feeling good. It's all about finding means and finding the things in our life that are going to make us happy things that we have already. And things that we we seem are very it is by receive a very, very beautiful message just the other day. And I think I'm gonna share that message with you if, if we can.
This message was posted actually on our family group by my uncle Milena Nazir as much as her and he says, Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, Our deepest fear that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that make that most frightens us. We ask ourselves who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous. Actually, who are you not to be? We You are a servant of Allah, you're playing small, does not serve the world, there is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of Allah that is within us. It's not just in some of us,
it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
very, very, very, very powerful statement is very, very powerful about the capacity we have. It's about a lot of glory and a grandkid. You know, it also reminds me of something I came across the other day, if I can understand if a child is afraid of the dark, but I can never forgive a man. If he's afraid of the light.
It is that it is a you know, the other day molana I mean, this happens to all of us. Sometimes, you know, even when you're driving your grades and place a to place B, whether it's a long journey or a short journey, we become so uptight, we are so concerned about the destination. I mean, reaching your destination, we forget to enjoy what's around you the other day, I was driving, I mean, just yesterday, I said to myself,
relax, look around you look at the last car. And really, you know, it was such a beautiful experience. You observe things you never observed before. And this is the whole point, you know, that we have every day an opportunity to take the granddaddy of Allah every day, we have an opportunity to see real beauty every day. Everybody misses opportunities. Therefore, our lives are up by mentionable. And we really know, for example, that the West often speaks about telling you not to smell the roses. It's
so true, you know, in fact, you find the people that live in cities, sometimes,
you know, the, the such frenetic life.
And then suddenly, the year of a bird, you know, wow, you know,
yeah, it's magic to them. Right. So So I think it's important for us, I mean, very, very critical. Of course, we spoke about turning to Allah. Right, the next point and besides this is about really, you know, in making the most beautiful example, in obese and allowed insulin. We need to do that if we are able to do these two things, right. I get to come across a person with strong in faith, who fully surrenders to Allah, who embraces
In the mobile web seminars, I've never seen such a person depressed, I've never seen such a person depressed.
The peace of mind, even in an adverse condition is the peace of mind even when today they tell him that you know, we cannot employ you anymore. He's got no complaints, you've got nothing, no complaints, right? Not that he is less than human, but he reaches a particular inner spiritual plane, in which is able to see things with different eyes knowing that nothing Nothing can happen except for the will of Allah. So I think that that is fundamental, make it very, very critical. And inshallah if we can do this total besides other practical things I'll share with the infant exam that Mr. Salim is of course the most practical thing you can do because every aspect your thoughts,
your feelings, the way you do things, the way you sleep, the way you eat, the way you admit to your family, the way you make to society there is need to not miss them everything is there. Now Surely, your success will come in following that example.
It is what it just got to be nine months after 11 we have to take a short break now there's going to be a janaza announcements every half an hour as well just to keep the people updated and a few airs will be coming back just after that inshallah and as is our discussion is tips and methods on how to live a happy life. Our guest this money it is camisa and we hope you're enjoying the program any feedback, any questions, SMS 0731738461 call us and joining the conversation on 18541548 Stay tuned to American radio calm International.
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27 minutes before 12 Welcome back to America radio
Internationally, welcome back to our guest, Idris camisa. It is very continuing in this discussion how to be happy.
We all are looking for happiness. And one of the things that I read a few years back was that we are all in this journey of looking for happiness looking for happiness, but we never realized that this journey itself has to be a means of happiness.
To try and get it is by taking it back with us.
I say this journey of trying to find happiness in itself should be happy for us.
Absolutely, you see this the whole point? The point is, you know, we must not in essence, look for happiness. If you do the right things, then one of the outcomes is going to be that you're going to be happy. And that's important right? Now, for example, the way we spoke about two or three things already, right, we spoke about, you know, soaking your environment, right? And admiring unless creation. So what it does, it relaxes you, when you relax and chill, you have more peace of mind. The other thing that is also critical, is about you know, showing gratitude to Allah, you know, you know, that, you know, it's very, very important that, you know, we need two things that are very
critical for the Muslim, the one is, you know, in a shocker and suffer, right? It's easy to show gratitude, it's easy, but we've not show enough of it. You cannot count the bounties Allah has given you and but it's not difficult, you know, to show someone that it's really, really important because if you know that the the tests coming from Allah, and it's meant inshallah to elevate your status, because when you go through a test what you what you normally do, you have to turn to Allah, Allah speaking to two ladies early on, before the program.
I said to them, you know, you ask any person will suddenly get sharp pains on his chest, like
sharp pains, suddenly from good, healthy, you know, he thinks the worse he sweats. And then he thinks in his mind, suddenly, his life is in front of him. And then he says, My gosh, you know, what was I stressing about you make a commitment to change, a commitment to relax the commitment to live a far more balanced life? Why should you get a wake up call to do these things, because we need to learn that death is an inevitable thing. As the you know, it's for everyone on lala land, all the profits were everyone. It's inevitable thing. So what is really, really critical for us to take an account of our life before that is taken account, you know, so that's very important. They show
gratitude, making sure
for whatever we have, and making sugar and being grateful for everything else that people do for us as well. It is a one of the of this diamond age, one of the main causes of depression is financial difficulties, financial problems, and particularly debt. And I would say that if we want to live a happy life, if you want to be happy, the first objective or the first step that we need to take, is to try and become debt free.
That's such an excellent point. Because you know what I know, I remember a friend of mine, you know, I should tell him that you must live within your means. He said, No, you must live below your means. If all of us, change our lifestyle, need a simpler life,
lives of humanity. Right, you find that you many more of us would be far happier, right? among the worst things ever. One of the most difficult challenges for us, most human beings, is to go into bed knowing full well, that you ain't getting too many people and knocking does it really impacts on your relationship with those individuals. And most importantly, the people who get the brunt of your anger is your family. And therefore it is very important for family members themselves, you know, to really, you know, you got to teach your children from a very tender age about budgeting, living within your means, and that we begin to value things you begin to value money. It's also an Amana.
So we're not supposed to be on the two extremes of being extravagant or the others. On the other extreme, of being miserly. So debt is something that we need to look at. And I think people in the same you know, for the believer who makes it
Through commitment in a restaurant, he wants to pay even the agent say amen to for that door in such a noble thing, and very, very critical point. And we are not here to impress the Joneses. Neither we hear sometimes, because we are very weak, men are pressurized by the wives, in order to go for expensive holidays to buy expensive things. And
you need to really, we need to set yourself up to assert yourself, of course, they are men themselves, some of them nothing. extravagant, you know,
and it just made this financial issue in
staying out of debt is something that
we have to do in order to live a contented, a happy and a prosperous life. Basically, it's just being able to budget and knowing that this is the amount of money I have in my hand I have available to spend, and you spend accordingly and just not spending more than what is available or what is available to you on credit. That is the basic thing of staying away from that. It is like, besides the financial aspects,
we have debt when it comes to
the rights of people. And when it comes to interpersonal relationships as well. There is depth in that, in that way we say we were going to visit or we have to visit and we have to meet up with so and so have to go and visit so and so's baby or sit by this house afterwards and as a bereavement in the family. And we have the accumulating Perhaps that is also a great means of being happy to to fulfill all of that what we could call social debt. No, no, that's not true. is one of the very critical
issues. You know, when you find time for less creation, Allah will find time for you.
You know, you ask any human being and the thought struck me yesterday. You know, I do London in LA
when I'm preparing my talk, so manuals, it takes a lot of my time. And the thought stuffing I can be sitting my computer 24 hours a day. I would love to lose my work. It is my sorry. Sorry to interrupt you there. We have a caller who's waiting on the line. Okay, let's take the caller Santa Monica Monica de la.
De La Habra. Mallanna
happiness is very easy to find. If we can only stay away from gossip, give us Zilla as of Colima says
don't become too far. The trouble is with us, we have an argument today we leave it for more than three days a week, a year, whatever. Whenever it suits us to make math.
You become too far after three days after an argument. Another thing is engage yourself in
commands of Allah, it's very simple, half an hour a day. for females who is at home.
Just what's good on study, study the Quran made me seek the truth. seek knowledge, that is what Allah says, and I promise you happiness, contentment will definitely, definitely reach you.
you find me in some era below.
He is quite good.
He says the point I can respond to your point that will come there will will come to this place. I think the very critical thing is, is once you do those things, for example, in terms of who your neighbors are, you know, you make sure that you fulfill their rights as it were right? That you and you owe rather your duty towards them, visiting the sick, going to the janazah and all of these things that he does closer to people, you'll find that once you become selfish and narrow in whatever you are doing, you can be no matter how wealthy you are, you become increasingly isolated. And this year he won the awards of people and when you go to the mosque for your Salah, just to a
smiling face meeting a person is a breeze How are you how are things man, you know, and just checking for those few minutes meeting them. Being part of this Omar Nagisa loudly was seldom this so much of our time.
With a burqa insurer, in consultations and all that, right? So these are three fundamental things and I just said this to the other day to a person. I said in your life, you cannot stop for the people in your life, then what the use of this life, if you cannot stop your life and bro for the janazah if you cannot stop for your life and attendant Nika, if you cannot stop for your life, stop and commiserate with some of the sympathize, that why are you living? Are you living for yourself, and what the sister says it's so important to develop some rituals, the term, the Quran is being read, you make your ticker, and the end all of these things need to be done, because the home is a
very critical place for people to be happy. You cannot be happy in society if you aren't happy at home. So the happiness at home is very, very critical. It comes from nurturing, loving, caring, and the most fundamental thing, lots of people are unhappy because they their pride and arrogance, does not allow them to forgive people for the mistakes they make. Are we not hypocritical mowlana that we would we want Allah to forgive us? Do not want Are we not critical or hypocritical, that we want Allah to forgive us yet we are not prepared to forgive Allah creation. And these are important things and what the sister mentioned about gossiping with men, it's about self purification, and
daily execution of the Mona Nathan attitude. And inshallah, you know, we need to understand that. And we mustn't put value, you know, disproportionate value on material things. I mean, that all of us know this in one way, or someone mentioned, Nabi sallallahu, wasallam, he said to me, I want to be the wealthiest person in the world.
Now, listen, 20 times, be contented, be contented, be contented.
Maybe sometimes our standards for happiness are very high. And I think that's the basic problem that every person has was not finding happiness, that his standard he is,
what he thinks happiness is, is something so high, that he feels that no, it's unachievable for me, and so I won't be happy until I achieve that until I reach that standard. And so he remains unhappy for the rest of his life. And maybe we can just define happiness, and just explained to people what happiness actually is, so that it becomes easily or more easier, achievable. For normal person, if that's the point. You see, the point people think that happiness is a,
an end in mind. But happiness is as you write this, and it's a journey.
And we find that many people think the grass is greener, on the other side, maybe envied the lives of other people. The point is this, if you do some basic things in life, if you on a daily basis, fulfill your own obligations on a daily basis, if you read your Salah was focused, if you for example, you know, pure thoughts, if you forgive, if you become a pro, activist, very, very important. You know, like many people, you know, who seem to they really want happiness, but they don't, we don't do anything about it. Like, if you look at the number of people on a daily basis, for example, who go and pay the bills, because they know they have to pay the bills or the lights go
off, or the lab issues with the authorities, every day to invest in yourself and people around you. So happiness is a state of mind. Happiness is an attitude. It is an attitude. And we are two people, two people, one person in other parts of the world, in the same circumstances as another citizen in other parts of the world. But if you meet both of them, why is it both of them have different attitudes, one of them
seems really peaceful, is positive, and he's happy. But the other person is known. A grown up with despondent and depressed is because on the one hand,
one person, the person, despondent and depressed, and whatever the mourn and the groaner has become a spectator in his own life. He is not taking responsibility for who he is.
responsibility for the fact that Allah is the Creator. He hasn't taken responsibility for the fact that if you walk towards Allah, Allah will run towards you. So the whole
alignment from the equation didn't have a problem. So you got to really, really adored the engineer spoke about money also the money in its proper perspective right?
Before we go on to that, we've got a caller who's waiting on the line, let's take the corner sulamani como de la, Polycom, slanza, baccala for such an enlightening program, I'd like to make a few points. You know, as as, as people as human beings, we always have some certain emotions, you know, whether we feel sad or angry. And, you know, sometimes what we do is suppress those feelings, because we looking at the way of just being happy. And I think it's very important that when you're going through something, your first deal with emotions, assume if you've had a loss in the family, deal with it, and then you can move on. And in such a way that, you know, it shouldn't be bringing
you down, it's just dealing with that emotion, or perhaps, you know, if you've been faced with the difficulty, because I feel that if you are not faced with the difficulty, you will not be able to show gratitude, you will not be able to show, you know, pleading with Allah for asking him to help you out through that difficulty. And another thing is, I've been diagnosed with cancer, and I'm undergoing chemo. And I must say that, you know, every time I go to the, to the hospital for my treatment, you meet the most amazing people that, you know, sometimes we feel Oh, if we go to places, we, you know, this pressure as such, but when we go there, it is so amazing, the wonderful
people that you meet. And I think through my journey, I've met so many people, that it's amazing to think the difficulties that they are going through, how are they dealing with it? How are they coping with it. And what is amazing is that you always find them having a smile on their face. So I think when we look at life, we must deal with our emotions. But at the same time, we mustn't take it to such an extent where it's going to bring us completely down. And you got to stay all the time ahead. And I think faith is very important across every line, that, you know, people that I've met, the only thing that got them through was faith, whether it was from a different region at different
backgrounds, but faith was what was got them through the difficulties. So zachman law seven.
It is very interesting words, do you have an SMS? That is?
Can I read it out?
To a sister, right? Okay, I think what you said is, is so true. And that's important. Because when you're going through any kind of challenge, of course, you speak to Allah about it. But also psychologists say disease healing, it's really, really sad sometimes in our family circles or with our friends, we were not given the opportunity, we keep those inside us and we begin to implode and suffer. And it's very, very important that you know, if you have a good network of family and friends, make a huge difference to your life. Because we are able to put that into perspective. You know, you've got support and everything that goes with it.
The SMS that has come in a Solomonic from happiness is each day to something good for others, spending equals brief gratification, even equals longer life, happiness, spend time with people over 70 and under six, do the right thing always live the three E's, that is energy, enthusiasm, and empathy should confer a positive program.
to the, to the all the people are phone and SMS, to the positive comments, you know, and we basically if you look at all of these things, you know, if you, you if you go out there some people really really and Allah make it easy for them. You will never see them smiling, you know, the
louder you are seven said it's mine.
You know, and that's important. If you begin to smile. When you smile, you exercise more muscles, right? Then when you found me smile, you bring joy to other people. And when you meet with people, you realize there are people who go through so much more than you do. You know, we are people that would add arms and legs, but they are smiling. Many of them are motivational speakers. The appeal is incredible. It's incredible. You know, the capacity we have is about us understanding why we on this earth. We are not here to make this world into agenda. You're going to have your moments, but how you deal with those moments and that's very important in
how you deal with those moments and how you deal with them.
He's also in the point of happiness with defining happiness in itself. For some people happiness will mean material things happiness will mean lots of people around them. Some people happiness would mean absolute seclusion, absolute quiet, that you can be rid of everybody else around them. So happiness also translate to two different things for different people can be all they can use, you can can you classify all different things is happiness? Or is happiness just one specific thing?
disappoint, right. They say ignorance is bliss, right? Now, if a person who likes to surf and he says I'm happy, like, but that's not you are you are a gregarious being. You belong to the Abyss and allowed you ascend and you are you are, you're obliged to interact with people, or lobbyists and allow your sense of worth this effect is no good, none of whom would be friends
or is befriended. Right. And you find that this is a very important thing. The important thing is that we have people that are genuinely happy are those people who have really a complete conviction that Allah is the control of things. Now, you cannot for example, you know, flout Islam or break common sense every day with impunity. You don't ask Allah for forgiveness, you hurt people every day. And you say to yourself, you know what, I met the man you know, I get two words about people that suck, no happiness, basically a true happiness Sakina for example, if you read your Salah would be with due diligence and devotion, you feel that kind of tranquility, no amount of money can buy.
It's about the only those people who really help others. In other words, you have become as a vice chair and you become as a humble servant of Allah. Now, if we do those things, he could be very, very happy. I mean, for example, manana, you know, this, right? You know, and sometimes
people would follow your, you know, your, your phone is ringing, the one help, but the joy you get when those people feel
when they feel a contentment, when you're given them hope they were desperate. And that to me, that to me, is real happiness, you know, you know, and important that we need to understand that. So it's not about being selfish. It's about being selfless. It's all about me, it's about us. It's about community, it's about the
value of these important thing
is my last few words of advice, how to be happy, be kind be good.
I think, you know, if you do that you need to do I think the most important thing is we need to discover who we are. Sometimes, you know, we're not we lack self awareness, we forget that we sometimes are hurting people, and we may not we may do it unintentionally, is important to discover who we are. And ask yourself this question. When are you heavy on the hearts of people? When people feel they feel a sense of relaxation? Do you bring a smile to people's face? Or do you bring a frown to people's faces? And I think you know, if we must stop this blame syndrome and expect entitlement, expect other people to make us happy. You go out there and make others happy and my gosh, you will
be very, very happy. And of course it starts from the home looking after your shisha Ballina
for your time Allah subhanaw taala reward you in
Montana Until next week, you take care look up yourself, as salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa Alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh lettuce, Idris camisa speaking to us out of Durban and sugerencias and to all of you for listening to our program this morning and the positive feedback SMS and calls that came in here last Hamilton a reward you tremendously any feedback you can still send through throughs and he [email protected] chickens is he letters to the operator or some of us uni and in some has he's looking forward to being with you on Saturday morning for marriage is on the air with one another such as female keep well