Friday Night Etiquettes Class – January 1, 2021
Channel: Daood Butt
File Size: 33.45MB
Episode Transcript ©
Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate and at times crude. We are considering building a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system. No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.
Li conocida to attend the taslim rubbish rally suddenly way acidity Emily. Emily Sonia Gabor Kohli. My brothers and my sisters said Mr. aleikum wa rahmatullah wa he will work out.
We will Oh, my ringer is still on. My mistake. Just give me one second.
So we continue
learning about the etiquettes of cinema
and live streaming during a lot of snow and freezing rain outside, so hopefully,
hopefully, there's no delays or anything of that sort.
also getting this notice so I guess while while we wait for people to login, let me just quickly take a look at what's going on here. Think seems like everything is fine for some reason.
We'll just leave it at that Shama?
is enabled channels here.
Okay, not too sure why that's happening. But on us, we'll just leave it as is. Because not really sure why I'm getting this notice and we can't get any
chat going on on YouTube and Facebook for some reason. You usually do have it enabled, that usually works perfectly fine. But for some reason today, it seems like it's not going to be working. So if anyone has any questions, then I guess you'll probably have to head over to Instagram to type in your questions there. Okay. So we typically go through the chapter or book of etiquette and today we are continuing along with our chapter on the importance of giving senem and different aspects of seeing a cinematic camera how to live or work cattle and so on.
And so today we continue with point number 20 which is under Selim, men hamdulillah alayhis. Salaam
really Memorial era so responding to the Selim of someone who comes and gives you the set m of another person so for example, someone you know you meet someone or you're going somewhere let's say you're traveling somewhere and a person asks you to convey your send them to so and so person, right like I'm going to Montreal to visit my family and one of the brothers in the community or sisters in the community says convey my Salaam to your parents. So what what do we need to know about that? So the person who's conveying the sentiment as well as the sentiment that's being conveyed itself?
So a man came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Jeonju an eland? nimbyism Allahu alayhi wa sallam Africa. So a man came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and said
My father is sending Salaam upon you as in he's conveying his salutations. He's conveying his setup. I said, Mr. Lee come to you. And he's saying this to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam responded and said, I like why Allah Vika set up upon you, and upon your father, be a sinner, right those salutations and greetings and so on.
Also, in the Hadeeth of I show the love of
the mother of the believers, of course, right the wife of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, she said,
verily the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to her in the gibreel gibreel, Allah has sent me the angel sends his Salaam upon you, you're going to la casa. So gibreel is sending salutation Salam upon you. Or Alisha.
So she said in response, call it where la he SLM was wahama to La,
La La, his center was to LA.
And so in this hadith we see that it sort of the lover and her response to the center of Djibouti by saying
and upon him be a Salim and Rahmatullah and the mercy of Allah subhana wa whatever.
We also see another Hadith now mentioning these three intentionally, okay, we see in another Hadith
and this one is about Khadija rhodiola and her were GB
sorry honey God Aloha, llama Bella nebby Soto Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to her, that God
is sending Salim upon you right is conveying his sentiments to you. So
in the law who was sent a woman who sent him where I like, where Alhaji briella Salah, so she says in the law wasallam Verily, Allah is a center woman who Assam and SLM comes from him. And if anyone's wondering what a centon is go back a few weeks and look at my German cookbook from a couple of weeks ago, where we were talking about the name of a lot of setup.
So she says very the who was sent up, right, a lot is a center. And from him comes a center where I lead care, were allegedly a center and upon you and upon jabril be a sellout. Right those salutations and greetings that we say a set and where are they come? What are you about accountable? So what do we learn from these three Hadees that we just finished hearing about? We learn that
out of these headings that are mentioned, the response to the sentiment of the person who's conveying the setup is needed to be said. So for example, you have
let me let me use let me use some props. Okay. So you have this person,
and you have this person, okay? The person in red is the one who's being visited.
And the person in yellow is the one who is going to visit the person in red.
The person in yellow is asked by one of their friends or someone else, please convey my son m to Mrs. Red.
Right? And so that person is traveling to Mrs. Red and says so and so person says a send them where are they come to you?
What we learn is the person in red who's receiving the senem
must respond to the sentiment that was delivered by person yellow.
But it is not necessary for Mrs. Red to say what an acre and upon you and upon that person be a center. So what's important is that they respond to the sentiment that was conveyed or sent through Mrs. Yellow.
But not specifically responding to Mrs. Yellow unless and of course, in the case that Mrs. Yellow says a Salam or aleikum.
And so Mrs. Red has to say we're aleikum wa salam. And then Mrs. Yellow says Khadija send send em to you. So Mrs. Red says,
Why they care or why leaky?
Well, I lay herself.
You could say, send them to this person. Or you could bypass this person because they're not the one who's sending the setup. It's another person, it's Khadija. And so the missus read says,
what Allah has set up, right, and upon her be a center. I hope that's understood. It's a little bit tricky. I had a whiteboard, I would have drawn it out but humbler it is what it is right? So even hijos Allah says,
when he finishes shoot him in book Hadeeth, Alisha and Elena v some Allahu alayhi wa sallam for Delilah and now available our job. So he says that I don't see it to be something that is worded that's compulsory to do, in the sense that Khadija have the logo and heard sorry, shut up, the owner did not respond to a sedum upon the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and to gibreel for she simply replied to do you believe what he has said Omar? Okay, so therefore it is not legit because the prophets are long, I think most of them did not correct her. And had she been saying something wrong? The profits on the longer end of usnm would have corrected I shall do so therefore what's
important is that we respond to the sentiment of the person who's conveying the setup
as in the person who said send myself them to so and so person not the messenger, okay.
The source itself caught up so we move on in sha Allah. Diem to here to the masjid Allah says, Allah, men Bilal Masjid so now we look at a different rooming or a different scenario.
When we enter into the masjid should we give send them to the people that are there or should we pray to here to mustard before giving
Send them to the people that are in the mustard.
So it is preferred
when we enter into the mustard that we begin by
praying to Him to the mustard, right? And that day it and mustard is basically our greetings to the masjid. Okay, our submission to Allah subhana wa tada in the mustard the house of a lot where he is worshipped.
So it is better to give greetings to you right to the house of a loss accountable to Allah before giving them to the people because Allah has more right over the people. Right? So Allah Subhana Allah has more right for us to be, you know, submitting to him and you know, giving back to him or giving to a loss of hanaway data before getting to the people. And we see this in a hadith of Laredo about the love and where he says verily the profits on a large variety Us and Them entered into the mustard for de la Rajaraman for Salah. So when the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam entered into the mustard
a men entered the masjid after him and went and prayed to Raka and you all know this hadith very well, from majah for solo marylander then that person after after praying to God came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and conveyed Sanam to him.
For dinner, bsm Allahu alayhi wa sallam so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam responded to his setup with an ecommerce synonym
for call Elijah for Sunday for iNec, lm to Sunday.
So we all know this Hadeeth now right, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told him go back and pray for verily you haven't prayed? Right? So in this Hadith, right? We all know this hadith and this hadith is very famous about the importance of the importance of praying properly and having too much Nina having, you know that tranquility in our prayer. And so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in this hadith he tells the men go back and pray for your prayer was not a prayer. It was a complete prayer when you didn't do it properly. There's something that was missing in it.
Now the scholars use this hadith to show that the prophets on a longer alley, he said alum
did not tell him first you shouldn't have come and give us Salaam and then you should have gone to pray your to Raka the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was correcting this man. So this is an example of the profits on the long run. I need to send them in a mode where he's correcting people, right? However, this men he prayed first, then he came and gave them and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he did not correct him in his setup. So he did what was right he came into the mustard and before saying send them to anyone or praying or saying how are you how's things, he went straight to the masala and he prayed. And as soon as he finished praying, then he went and gave sent
them to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.
So the half of Allah, the rate of Allah Subhana Allah to Allah is that we prayed to here to the mustard when we enter it, we know the ruling of it. We've studied that already. Now when we look back at it, we think to ourselves, okay, I'm now comparing the right of Allah and the rights of another human being which one takes precedence. Of course, it's the right of Allah subhanho wa Taala. And therefore, we pray the two of our character here to the masjid first, and as soon as we're done, then we say set them or they come to the people, okay to whoever else is there. So, very simply,
you know, to recap, with regards to this, you know, the scenario, a person enters into the masjid and they see that there's two or three people there. What's most important is that you pray to God first and then you give them to whoever else is there.
Now what about entering into the mustard when the Juma football is ongoing? Okay entering into the mustard on the Jumeirah hotma is ongoing. Here we see in a hadith of Abu right out of the lava and
the prophets on a long way I think you are sending them or the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said
if you say to your friend or to your companion
on the day of Juma as in during the Juma clip when the hook was ongoing and your friend comes in and might say something to you or start speaking to you and you say to him unslaked right you told him be quiet
when email, we have to
And the email is can is is you know conveying the or conducting the hookah
faqad level the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says For verily you have aired you've you've made a mistake or you've done something that is senseless right that is that shouldn't be done okay. So we learn from this Hadeeth now when we talk about you know the importance of giving senem when you enter into the masjid and the Habib is is on the member delivering the hookah should you give Salaam to someone or not know we learned from this that you do not give send them to your friends you do not talk to your friends or anyone that's around you, you don't have conversations with them. Now of course this is when you enter into the main prayer hall. The reason why I say when you enter
into the main prayer hall is because
every Masjid is designed differently. And sometimes you will enter into the masjid area as in the building of the mustard, but you need to interact with people especially nowadays right when you know we have temperature checks, we have registration, you know you have shoes that need to go into bags, you have to make sure that you have this agenda. So you may need to interact with people. So from the time that you're entering into the building, that's not really what we're looking at. We're looking at the time that you get into the actual masala the prayer area, okay.
Once you get into the prayer area, saying send them to someone else is not needed. Right. You do that after the prayer after the prayer. So you would listen to the hookman you come in you pray your to Dhaka to hate you to the masjid right remember we learned this already in our essential fit class. If you come into the masjid during the hookah, you have to still prefer to Canada here to the masjid. Why the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was on the mend, but he was delivering his hookah and someone came in and sat down and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam pointed directly at him and said, you know, fool and so until a person stand up and pray, you're
here to the masjid. Right, stand up and pray. You're here to master your craft.
So we can pray but we should not speak. And that speak or speech includes not giving setup.
Okay, not giving senem to the person that is next to us or our friends that we see sometimes we will come in like, What's up, man? Sorry, I'm late. And we'll catch some food later on. It's no No, no need for that. Not even set up. Just sit down. Oh, sorry. Just prayer to Annika and sit down. And if you haven't, you know if you're already there or something of that sort. Just sit down and pray
your to record if you didn't, and if you already did then sit down and don't speak okay.
So it is not compulsory to convey this enum at that point in time. Why? Because again, the rate of a loss of hand without it is more important than the rights of the person. Right? A person says to my heart You came in you didn't give me set up. No, it's the heck of a lot right now. You listen to the cookbook. You're supposed to be listening and paying attention. Now's not a time for talk. Now's not a time for set up. Now. It's not a time for that if you wanted to get set up and talk and ask how things are you should have come early, come early to Joomla. But if you come late to dramatic, don't expect to still have your cake and eat it too. Right? So you listen to the hotbar. So it is disliked
to convey send them to someone else during the whole time. All right. Now.
Here's another scenario.
If someone came into the mustard, and that he mom is conveying the hookah and they give you Sanam. What should you do?
Right, what should you do?
Is it Why did upon you to respond to their setup because they gave you set up? So we just learned that they're not supposed to but what if they did? What if they did convey the center? Then are we supposed to reply to it? Because it is the right of a believer that when they give send them to you that you respond to their setup. The answer to that is that it is not permissible to respond to their sentiment based on the headlines that we just learned. Right? It's not permissible to respond to the center, because it's not the time to respond to the setup. You can respond to their sentiment after the prayer, even if they get upset tonight. Remember when we were students in Medina and we
asked our teachers and say, you know,
people will get upset if you don't give them if you don't respond to their setup. They'll be like, What's your problem? And then you'll create a fitna, you create a fitna, right, a problem between two believers will be like, why aren't you responding to my setup? What is the problem is or you have an issue with me like Why aren't you responding to me? What did I do wrong?
And this is where our teachers reminded us sometimes. This is the way you teach people.
Sometimes this is the way you teach people because people will come and they'll say Salaam and you'll replace
to their senem, even though you're not supposed to, and they will never learn that they're not supposed to give center. But the day that you catch them off guard and you don't give, or you don't reply to their setup, and you listen to the football.
And then afterwards, they may come to you and say, Why didn't you reply to my Salaam and you say, you know what, I wanted to reply to your son, um, but the clip was ongoing and the profits on a longer and that you SLM teaches us that even if you tell someone Be quiet,
right, they're making noise and you tell them Be quiet, or they start to say something and you say Be quiet,
then that's a mistake on behalf of the person. And so
it is not permissible to respond to the person center. And this is a way of teaching our friends and colleagues and so on how to properly
behave during the drama. Okay.
Another scenario with regards to Jamal and getting sent him
What if someone comes in
and comes next to you to pray or whatever to sit next to you, and sticks their hand out, they say Salaam and they stick their hand out to shake your hand, right? They stick their hand out to shake your hand, what do you do?
Do you say Salaam No, we just learned to you don't say the center, right? Just remain quiet and focus on the football, pay attention to the country, even what's being said. So this is where the scholars say.
without speaking, you simply stick your hand out, shake their hand and continue to listen to the hook.
Okay, so where the scholars say that you would basically shake their hand. But that's it, don't respond to their send them Don't say anything.
I actually remember learning from our teachers, Medina, that you don't even stick your hand out. Don't even stick your hand out. Because in a narration, if a person even just goes like this to tell someone to be quiet, then they have also, you know, lost focus of the hookah, and therefore they've lost out on that, right, they, they were distracted. And they intentionally, you know, left off the hook, but to do something else.
And so this is where, you know, our teachers taught us to be a little bit more strict, you know, you don't even stick your hand out and give it out. However, you know, the the legend a dame so the the
legend at the the group of main scholars, right, especially within, you know, the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, where they're, you know, they say that it's okay to stick your hand out and to shake the hand of the person, as long as you're not going to say anything or respond to the setup. Personally, I try not to even shake the person's hand, I keep my head down, or I keep myself focused on the coffee. And so even if someone comes in, and they want to give me set up, I'm focusing on the coffee, and they may stick their hand out to me, I look at them and just, you know, look back at the coffee, or the won't even look at them. And that's a way of showing people training people and
usually, you know, brothers will come up to me and say, you know, sorry, David, I didn't mean to, you know, disturb you in the clip. And that's when I'll explain it to them. You know, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did not want us to do this, it's not the time for them. It's the time to focus on the time to learn from the hotbar and time to understand something about our Deen so that we can, you know, better ourselves and increase ourselves and I
know, some of you are thinking, what are you doing sitting there? Usually, you're the one delivering the hookah? Well, when it was not, you know, this pandemic and COVID I would lead to germanos a month in our Masjid and the other two I would either attend or, or go somewhere else and attend or lead somewhere else, right? So at times, I would take a Juma off in the year one or two or three here and there in order to learn from someone else in order to refresh my ideas in order to you know, understand my faults, my mistakes, and to see if I can, you know, learn something from another Habib or someone else was delivering a drama. Okay, sometimes by sitting and listening. And this is
really what what makes us so good at what we do. You know, in whatever field you're in, try to always put yourself in the shoes of the person receiving the work that you're doing. So if you're doing work, and you're like, that's okay, they're only paying me this amount. So I'm going to cut corners, well put yourself in their shoes, they're going to notice that you cut corners, and they may not come back and give you their business once again. Right. And the same thing with like an email or hopefully you put yourself in the shoes of the of the listener. If there are any events or any other machines that are attending here. I always tell them all this stuff
Put yourself in the shoes of the listener. So if you don't like to sit there for, you know, 45 minutes listening to a football, why are you delivering a football 45 minutes, right. And that's why, you know, last week with our class, or two weeks ago, you know, I was going through a chapter in the essential thick class on Sunday. And it went really long, it was an hour and 45 minutes, and I didn't want to do that. But I also did not want to break up the chapter. So I wanted to complete the entire chapter. And then when I finished it, having thought about it, I was like, You know what, I probably shouldn't have done that. Because an hour and 45 minutes is a really long time for some
people in an assignment class. I'm used to it, I'm okay, I can go for an hour and 45 minutes, I can go for eight hours, I can go for 12 hours in his standard class, even though it's not healthy. Of course, if there's breaks in between, that's good.
But not everyone can take that. Right. So
this is where some kind of a lot we need to put ourselves in the shoes of the listener, or put ourselves in the shoes of the person who's receiving from us. Okay, now, let's look at something else. And Shall we just grab something here.
So we just went out as a family for a walk in the snow is really snowy and snowing a lot panela. And what happens when you go out is your skin dries My hands are like hurting me.
A lot. So this, this will help me to focus a little more on the class. Alright. So something that we learn from this as well, with regards to the hookah
by extension of the Sanam and not responding to someone sent up should we be playing with our phones during the Juma football? Should we be on Facebook? Should we be you know, doing anything other than listening to the hookah? And obviously the answer to that is now, what's really interesting though, I don't know, maybe my clip was are really, really boring. You know, people might not be paying attention, maybe there's a mistake on my end. But I do see and sometimes people sitting in the front row. I remember a couple of weeks ago, I'm thinking to myself, you know, so how about, you're doing a Juma football during a pandemic, so everything is shorter, right, our clip was like seven minutes
long maximum. And, you know, there's so many time constraints, so many little things, people have to register in advance, people have to, you know, come with the bag of shoes and the prayer mat and their masks and they have to show their registration and they also have to have their temperature checked. And then they come in and they listen to the volunteers and they sit spaced out.
And I'm delivering the Juma hookah. And I look to my right and someone, you know, sitting to my right
in the front row, in the very, very front row of the masjid, is on Facebook,
scrolling through Facebook, while I'm delivering the clip on among the member, and I'm just looking right down at the at the brother's phone. And I'm thinking to myself, you know, people struggle to register to come to Juma and here this brother is sitting there. And I was thinking, so how is my clicker that boring? I know, it's definitely not long, because our hook buzz for the last seven months have only been, what, seven minutes long, five to seven minutes long. I was thinking to myself, you know, someone else could have taken that spot, someone who really wanted to go for a job or someone who really wanted to listen to the clip, but someone who really wanted to pay attention.
And I know some of you will say don't don't judge the person. Maybe they were taking notes, but I could see what they were doing. And he was not taking notes he was scrolling on on Facebook. And so I think to myself, is there a problem with me? Or is there a problem with you know, our community, our Ummah, that we just don't value?
And kind of when you think of it, ask Allah Subhana Allah in our, into our hearts to strengthen our email and bring us closer to him because without the help of a loss of handling data, we're lost, right, we're lost. And so that's just something that I threw in there as you know, something a little extra, and a loss of handling data guide me to what is true and what is right. And make it easy for every single one of us. I mean, so I see Sharon avita has logged in. Are you very quick. If you want we can share screens and you can teach the class for us.
I feel like embarrassed or whatever, you know, my my peers someone senior to me is
you know is on the class or on the live stream. And so Pamela he's younger than me and age but senior to me and knowledge. Right, a little mini amen lesson.
Okay, the last last point that we're going to take for today, inshallah tada that is
a terrible evil Selim cobble canal. So, to be eager to give senem before
Kind of before speech before talking to each other, right? So when you meet someone basically very simple. When you meet someone, what's important for us to do is to give send them first, right? Greet the person or send them or any combining kind of setup. Even if it's something that's important, like a question or you know, a clarification to something, we begin with a synonym or Alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatu. Now, that's important for us to understand because a lot of the time we belittle the center, right? We look at the cinemas as just just something we say when we greet each other and that's it. No, it's a door ha as I've mentioned before in the previous weeks,
and therefore when we give sent them to one another, we're saying door up upon that person, you know, and asking from Allah subhana wa Tada. And therefore, before we get into anything, before we start asking a question or before you know anything of that sort, with someone, you simply walk into an office or come into someone's office or mustard or something of that sort, give them sit down, you come into your home, say sit down, right, we learnt this last week. And so in sha Allah, Allah, that's all that we're going to cover for today. And then next Friday, we will conclude our chapter on the etiquettes of giving senem and we might begin either next week or the week later. The
etiquettes. of seeking pardon as in entering upon someone else, right. Or pardoning ourselves from others or together.
So that's basically it for today in sha Allah, Allah does not come to local haven without a local fee come for attending. If anyone has any questions, feel free to type them in now. I know that on YouTube and Facebook I can't really see them for some reason this is something new that came up maybe I just needed to refresh my
but I see here that I'm live and I'll wait for anyone to type in any questions or while I just fiddle around with this a little bit
Do you have any questions feel free to type it in in Sharla?
All right, no questions good hamdulillah so I'll see you all on Sunday in sha Allah h pm for our essential thick class
just come on level headed and once again for attending the last panel data pullback and haven all of your lives and I look forward to something just came in I look forward to seeing all of you soon inshallah. Okay, so Sunday morning come after your workout. It comes Sonoma come to LA you're gonna get a very good that's putting the knowledge into action. Okay, putting knowledge into action. When we learn about something we we do it right away.
Do we prioritize to hate the mustard or the hookah? Okay, so as I mentioned, maybe you came a little bit late for that. you prioritize the to hire to mustard. Okay, so you come in, you pray to hate the mustard if the hook was already ongoing, and then you sit down, right as soon as you're done and you pray a short prayer as in, you're not going to recite Long's who was and take long and so on. Why the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was delivering his hotbar and one of the companions came in and sat down and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam noticed that he did not pray. And so he pointed at him directly and asked him to stand up and to pray. And so therefore, we would pray the
two of our character here to the masjid, when we enter the masjid, before sitting down and listening to the whole
Are we allowed to nudge the person beside us if they are dozing off during the drama football? No, leave them alone. Okay, leave him alone. If someone is falling asleep during the football, you pay attention to the football, they are supposed to focus on themselves. You're supposed to focus on what you have to do. If that person is falling asleep, let them fall asleep. Why?
Because the pen is lifted upon three people if they fall asleep in the hippo, then we ask Allah Subhana Allah to have mercy on them. However, don't take this as Okay, now I can go to gym and fall asleep before the football and sleep through it right find a nice spot against the wall and go to sleep like I don't know how some brothers do it but they literally just knock out during the drama hookah
Loss of Hannibal Lecter Allah have mercy upon us All
right, any other questions?
No one has any questions you're free to go
okay Someone is asking
in general are we allowed to respond from the restroom so we learned last week that we do not say Selim when we are in the bathroom, but in general a response if it is a needed response, then respond like if it's an emergency or something coming up, but generally No, we should not speak while we are in the bathroom. Okay, generally we do not speak while we are in the bathroom. Do what you need to do and get out. Okay, close. That's all the time that we have for today. Just like a little Hayden, or someone law who I send them all about our kind of you know how to do it. You can use a limb or syllable