Loss of My Brother and Son

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rockin started catch everyone welcome back to Quran 30 for 1300 la blah mean we are on TJ's 12 Now Al Hamdulillah. And we're joined by one of the most beloved human beings on the face of the earth to me even though he lives very very far away and have the lover I mean check without aside from the dinner.

I can't tell you how much I love. Chef beloved for the sake of Allah is a dear brother Subhanallah, someone who felt like a long lost brother until we actually got to spend some time together in the UK this past December with him to dinner. And before we get started to have the law also said he was his favorite speaker and the English Darrow. So I was like, oh, man, that's, that's a high testimonial. But I think many people have hamdulillah have been touched by your words over the years and your classes shift the dial and some of those lectures and those recitations and I think what, you know, what distinguishes them is that they're always heartfelt. And you know, subhanAllah a few

a few years ago, obviously, you know, we came to know of the tragedy in your life and I think people got to see even another level of the that heartfelt connection and I witnessed it myself and him did and the way that you try to help people

you know, through their through their grief and you know, are willing to be vulnerable through you know, some of the own hardships that you had.

And we just we love you Schiff but we are so pleased and so grateful that you're joining us at a hard time in Australia, because Australia is like 46 hours ahead of us apparently.

Hello, how are you?

Alhamdulillah Allah those words a Masha Allah they just touched me Allah He very quick share Omar, Sheikh Abdullah, it's the honor is mine Well, like I I'm privileged and I ask Allah Subhana Allah to accept our actions and our deeds. And Allah accept your great efforts. You too are no less inspirational to me then then the new beautiful words that you've just said to me, masha Allah.

Well, I've always loved both of you from afar.

In our trip to the UK, we became even more closer than ever, I truly did feel the Brotherhood from you. And

I don't want to now say too much because I don't want you to feel uncomfortable however. Allah knows how much I love you every moment

whilst I gather us under under his love on the Day of Judgment

shuffling have you, we're gonna actually just ask you so this is a special session, typically we all will reflect on the judges Chicagoland I will take a section or guest we'll take a section. But we wanted to do something a little bit different.

Today.

You know, for those for those who are not familiar obviously with with, you know your story, obviously Surah Yusuf is a difficult story. But it's also comforting story it's a she felt secure. And

I think you know, just for the sake of the audience that may not have been aware of shift but lost his son or him online, his brother or him online a tragic accident

very recently, and was was so gracious enough to actually be willing to sort of talk through sort of Youssef and the Quran and what it has meant to him through that and I think Inshallah, this session will be very helpful, especially to people that are suffering in whatever ways that they are shift, but we're just going to ask you to talk as long as you want to have the little and I will, will simply reflect after you speak and challenge out to publish my pleasure. svetla Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam ala Rasulillah. My brothers and sisters, truly a chef Ahmad said, I chose to speak about sort of use of in a realistic way, or in a practical way and just bring it

to our lives. Through my own personal experience of my interaction with the Surah, Escher hamara began by saying yes, I did go through a tragedy like many of my brothers and sisters around the world also went through it. And for the first time, I was able to really feel what they feel and as if I am connected with all my brothers sisters around the world and that's that's what triggered me even more to meet with people, my brothers and sisters who have gone through grief around the world and connect with them. But hamdulillah last pan dialer has

brought this about and I truly have connected a lot of brothers sisters around the world. So when you share your your your pain and your grief and your experience with other people share it and you bounce off each other. The

This is Rafa, this is mercy that Allah spent Allah has given. And that's why we should be a community and we should communicate with each other and not just isolate ourselves as Allah says that the brothers, the we are brothers and sisters, and we are like a building, each rock supports the other rock. Each stone each brick supports the other brick. And we are like one body. If one part of us is in pain, the rest of it is also in fever and can't sleep. So we have to give back and and take and given 100 Eleuthera experiences, I've found that a lot of people have found relief, and I found relief myself. So the first thing I want to begin with is, it was a tragedy that was

unexpected. And it happened right before my eyes and my father's eyes.

And we had a couple of cousins with us who witnessed everything. It happened within a split moment. One minute, you're somewhere. And you've got this image in your head of the future with your son and your brother and your family. And you've got all these ambitions and these things you're looking forward to and suddenly Allah subhanaw taala says no, there's something that needs to change.

And Allah subhanaw taala direction into a total different world altogether, the other world becomes non existent. And you think, where is it? Was it a dream? Was it?

Was it real?

And sometimes even question, Are you real?

Now I'm starting off like this just to be raw and real to everyone else. Because we're all humans, I'm human. And every chef and Imams scholar, whoever it is, every prophet is real, and there's pain, there's crying, there's sadness, there's grief, we all go through it. But there's only one difference between a believer or a person who has How can I say a certainty in Allah subhanaw taala and the hereafter, and patients that is coupled with it, so you're clean, and sober.

And I'd like to start off with that by saying that sort of use of gave me these first foundations, your clean and sober patients and certainty and Alas, pantalla, which kept me afloat. But before I say that,

you know, when a person goes through grief and tragedy, the first thing that the human wants to do is connect emotionally connect to someone

that they can confide in and share their experience. And it can't be just anybody has to be somebody who can relate. And better yet, someone who has shared your experience, and what better than the prophets, and even people around you, you've got family and friends and people you meet. But ultimately, the prophets, for me, was the greatest foundation and greatest

boat which I and Ark which I boarded and helped me sail, and my family. You know, when I was a child, my father used to connect me to the Companions into the prophets, he always told me the Prophet stories, and the companions, and from a very young age I had, I could feel my connection to the past great men and great women. And I even got bullied at school, believe it or not, when I was really young, and you seven because I wanted to pray at school. You know, in Australia, people were still new to Islam, Muslims were migrating and I wanted to pray, I didn't wanna have a girlfriend, I wouldn't shake hands with another woman or another girl or touch her because, you know, Islam tells

us all these things. But when I was a child, I got bullied because of it. And I started to connect with the companions and the prophets. And I said, Well, if they went through hardships, then I feel privileged to go through this type of hardship. And so this was, you know, the foundation.

Until the moment the tragedy happened. As soon as I saw my son passed away, and my brother Moments later,

I needed that emotional connection with someone. My father was there, but he also needed an emotional connection. My mother came along, she needed support, what am I supposed to do? How do I keep myself up on my feet?

And I was very vulnerable, extremely vulnerable, in every sense of the word. The first thing I started to ask about is color, where to from now what happens now? You know, all those plans are now shattered. Where do I go? What's going to happen to me now, where where is my journey?

Do I give up everything that I have done before? And you know, there are questions of of why, but not in a sense of going against the laws decree but more like what the angels asked when when they said to a lawyer of Our Lord will you create on Earth beings will shed blood and corrupt

And he said, I know that what you did not know. And that's what I held on to. So Subhanallah as soon as this tragedy happened, I needed to connect with a higher power. Because the soul has gone to Allah subhanho wa taala. And I want to, I want to be there, I want to see what's happened, you still have that connection with that loved one.

And it's just been ripped away.

So

I spent the next two weeks at least while I was in Lebanon, unable to eat or drink even unable to sleep.

Just you become a little bit lost. And you need support and guidance. And among the most impactful sources in the Quran was sort of the use of Wallahi I do not say this lightly. When you have a connection to the Quran or your life. The Quran is the first place that you go to.

You know, back in my days, I used to, I have to admit, I listen to a bit of music and it intrigued me and moved me and everything. But there wasn't a time where I listened to music, say pop music or r&b And then I thought I feel like going to the masjid now. But when you listen to the Quran, it connects you to Allah subhanaw taala in a way that cannot be described.

So I resorted to sort of the use of

and believe it or not brothers and sisters, this is what happened.

So that the use of

you know, Allah subhanaw taala tells us what sort of usif that he gives us two types of supports. One is objective, and the other one is subjective. The subjective one is really about yourself what you go through personally. And it's difficult to tell people about it. Because it's really yours. It's something between you and Allah. The objective is reading the Quran reading this and reciting the story of use of Ali Salam and other prophets. But that's objective, that's for everybody. But Allah has found that it does give you something personal that you and only you can share between you and Allah. But the condition is, you need to connect with Allah's pantile. So here's the first one

that I went to.

The first thing that came to my mind were dreams

that I started to reflect on very heavily until today.

They were dreams that I saw before the tragedy, and I'll share them with you now, for the first time. When the first streams I started seeing for about a year, on and off was an ocean rising on Earth. And I'm climbing the mountains and my son, brother, and family are with me.

And I'm guiding everybody in saying this is the end of the world. The ocean is going to get us if anyone wants to survive, keep climbing the hill keep climbing the hill. And as we reached a certain distance,

people are going upwards. My brother and my son who were with me, for some reason Subhanallah It was as if I was in Lebanon in my dream, near the village, our village, my pit, my father's village where I spent some childhood there. My brother and son left me and said we're going there to get protection and safety.

And you know, our brothers and sisters, that's exactly what they got buried.

I mean, my son was born here in Australia, my brother's born here in Australia, they had never been to Lebanon in their life.

And in that's literally nine days that we spent in Lebanon

Subhanallah they passed away, and I swear by a lot they got buried exactly in that village. And

the hill looked exactly the same as my dreams.

And you know, you know we read Surah Yusuf and you say Yusuf Ali salaam, seeing a dream as a child and telling his father Dad, this is what I've seen. And you know, I went through that. So as my father I told him about the dream and we could never make sense of it really. But that was one thing that was subjective for me through dreams and Allah's method of preparing you for something. Now, the second dream I saw was about one month before they passed away. And again reflecting on sort of the use of and true dreams of Yusuf Ali salaam, seeing the 11 stars and sun and the moon prostrating to him and his father, giving him hope, but at the same time, ending his conversation with Yusuf Ali

salaam with a statement that's a bit abstract. And that is in narrow Bekaa Valley Mon. Hakeem, your load is all knowing he knows what you're going through. He knows what is going to happen to you. He knows exactly where it's going to end up, which gives you a sense of trust and connection with Allah that he's never going to leave you and he knows exactly what you're going through and what you're going to be facing.

And how key means wise, you know your core values to them use as Father

Couldn't tell him what exactly this was, what was going to happen. I mean, you can see later on day by day, Sam is planning and, and guiding his children but everything keeps going. It looks like it's going the other way. It's not going according to God's plan and, and his advice. Because Allah subhana, Allah is hacking his wise. And until we can have that certainty, we're going to struggle even more with hardships. See, you have to let your heart go really to Allah subhanaw taala have to really give it to him. If they really give your heart to Allah subhanaw taala and put that trust in His servant in certainty of his knowingness and his wisdom. So the other dream that I saw, I don't

know if you're familiar with an organization here in Australia, which will show the organization which was set up by a young man who had cancer and passed away a light hung his name is Ollie Burnett. He, he became very, very popular

on social media, and many people visited him and he passed away I met him.

And he established an amazing charity organization, and lots of mustards and orphanages were built in his name, and well as a result of what he left behind as a legacy. Because Michelle Allah, I've given him wealth, and he donated all into that course, which keeps going today. It's called ma TW and

Ali Burnett, I had seen him a month before the passing of my brother and son. And I was in the car with him. And as if I was taking him around to all these different places in Africa and other parts of the world where he had established orphanages and mustards and I'm sort of hosting him and giving him news that this is what your legacy has left behind. And he's just looking at me smiling and nodding, and in a peaceful, peaceful way, as if he wants to tell me something. But he, he doesn't want to hurt my feelings and says, If he knows what I'm saying, is just going along with it. That's another subjective thing for me to have a dream that happened just before. And

a month after that they passed away.

And I reflect on that dream. So then what happened to me was that I asked a lot and made it night and day, night and day. And I have to admit,

I said, Dr. Rob, are not going to be able to eat, I'm not going to be able to be myself. I can't, until I get some help from you, my Lord. I need your support. I need your assistance. I need to see my son, I need to see my brother.

And we're into our Hummer Rahim and I use this, the name of him the Most Merciful. I said, as you showed Yusuf Ali Salam dreams and as you gave you up or valleys Salam comfort, and everybody gives me comfort, I need your comfort. yado

And subhanAllah, the moment when Allah He the moment, I really gave my heart to Allah subhanaw taala I still remember that night, everybody was asleep. And I'm just alone with no distractions up in Lebanon. And I, I felt that I'm no longer in this world. It's really gave my heart to Allah and had absolute certainty that Allah span dialer will make things better for me, and He will guide me and something amazing is going to come out of this there has to be a great wisdom. This is from Surah Yusuf, I'm reflecting on that as I'm reading it.

And that was that night that Allah Subhana Allah showed me my son in the most realistic way that I have never I can't describe it.

And he assured me that he's fine. And that he had a bit of sadness that

that he had to leave me. But he comforted me.

And he assured me that he's with good people and so on.

So these are some things that Allah spent Allah gives you confidence, the true dreams from sort of yourself.

The other thing is

the need for emotional connection, which is called an audience that I mentioned before, and I found once emotional connection with my prophet and messenger Yusuf Ali Salam and Jakob from both angles. Me as a son, while my father was there witnessing the tragedy, and me as a father, like jacobellis, now

I'm living Jacobian use of both.

And there's a brother, him and his brothers him and his brother Binyamin and we missed him and it just hit home so much,

that he helped me tremendously.

And

these are the these are the foundations that he laid down for me Subhan Allah.

One of the other things in sort of the use of

is that when Qatar becomes a question you know, you have

To know, eternal past and eternal presence and eternal future and everything that is happening at every millisecond to be able to make,

you know, to interpret or make makes make meaning out of something, but you can't, you don't know everything, you can only know some things. And the rest is just left on trusting and relying on Allah subhanaw taala. And really, really just submitting to him. That's what really helped me just, but when you follow the truth, and you know that you're following a divine revelation, or Quran that hasn't been changed, even by a letter, 1400 years, you can put your trust in, in a in a deeper way. I mean, there are other people who put their trust in certain beliefs that they have certain revelations that they connect to, and it works. But when you're connecting something that you truly

know is true, in every sense of the word.

And the evidence is all supported. And you don't need to fabricate or lie to yourself or make up something that sort of convinces you. It just, I mean, when I recited the Quran, I found the Quran reading me, I wasn't reading the Quran, the Quran was reading the Quran reads you. And when you feel that you really find that connection, that's what helped me SubhanAllah. And I advise my brother and sisters to do that resort to the Quran, and really prepare ourselves and sort of sit down and try to understand it and live with it.

So the Kadota means that ALLAH SubhanA, Allah knows, knows, and there has to be something amazing, it's going to come out of it.

Maybe I lost my dad, I took my son because had he grown up, it'd be Western, maybe my brother had grown up, it'd be worse for him or for me or for someone else, there is certainly a change that is going to be much better for us in this world. And in the next. See, this is not easy. And it takes time. But that's where I reached the boundary now. Because in sort of Joseph, in the end, there is victory, triumph, happiness, family comes together, the enemies become friends, his brothers who tried to kill him, they asked him for forgiveness. And that's another thing actually in my life. And I'm not going to talk too much about that. But I also could relate to that. You know, there are

times when people conspired against me, even when certain times when people said things, but if you are patient and stick to the truth and keep going, I lost my third eye turns everything around. I swear by a lot of these people come back to you. And they humble themselves before you and say I apologize from my heart in a very awkward about it without you doing anything. Subhanallah

there was the guilt of sadness for me. You know, because in Islam, we're taught that you shouldn't be sad for long and if you're too sad, then you're going against the loss Kadar, this is what people say, or if you cry too much. They say it's a sign that you're not accepting Allah's Will and people try to tell you Don't cry, this is all wrong.

Wrong, and going through it myself. I could feel how wrong it is. Because even the prophets cried. So I looked at Jacobo at a salon. And I thought surely, surely him being so sad that his eyes went white,

because he missed his sons so much.

I'm not better than Jacobo a sinner. I can be sad. I can miss my son and my brother. I can miss them a lot. But there's one difference. jacobellis salam held his tongue he held himself together.

And as the prophet Mohamed Salah Salem followed, you know, we say the eyes tear

the hearts are filled with grief.

You know, we miss you. But we won't allow our tongues to say anything except that which pleases a loss paradigm where the companion said the Rasul Allah even you are crying because even they had that idea that you're not supposed to cry. And he said, No.

You have now if it was under management, if you said you had no you have no health in now rathna These tears are tears of mercy. You know, when you love someone when you miss them, it's the Mercy that's reacting.

So that's what happened. And I felt better about crying a lot of crying more than being said. jacobellis Salem State said Allahu Alem how long we don't know exactly from the verses of the Quran, but it looks like it could have been two decades at least.

So it's okay to miss someone I still miss them till now it's okay for everybody to miss them. Sometimes you just cry. Sometimes you get sick and your distractions go away you try to distract yourself in life but then when you're alone and you become vulnerable, you remember the loved ones and you cry. And when you cry you call upon Allah. Because they are call ballets Salah and when he cried and he was said what did he do? He said in a school with the what was needed Allah

what Allah moving of law he may Allah Tala moon and he used to say to his children who kept on saying harsh words to him

Man, they kept saying to him Father, you're still in your old ways. You keep missing him, isn't it over you got to take it easy on yourself that people taught me that when I was up in Lebanon, even here in Australia when I came back, people told me that they say, you know, you're a chef here and Imam you should you should be the role model. Let us see. I thought What do you mean that you see? I'm not being tested here by people to let you see. This is what you see you're seeing a human before your eyes, like our core values seven but you won't hear me saying anything that's wrong, inshallah.

So you turn to Allah subhanaw Dionysus, I merely complain, my sadness and my grief to Allah and I know about a lot of that which you did not know. I know that Allah is wise, I know that Allah subhanaw taala has a plan. You guys don't really see it. He said to his children.

And so the nights were the best for me, connecting with Allah praying to Allah subhanaw taala

you know, talking to him and complaining to him about my sorrow and my feelings, complaining in a respectful way.

These things really, really work. Subhan Allah, and I love it. You know, when when I'm counseling and helping someone they

they cry? And it's okay. It's good to cry. It relieves you Michelle, this is Rama from Allah.

So extreme connection someone said to me, the reason you're going through this is because you had a strong love and connection to your son and it's true. I had a there was no best friend more to me than my son. And my brother we live together in the same house we woke up together we went and came together, you know, from places and

and then to see them leave me Subhanallah I can't describe the pain. So

the pain is intense. And someone said to me, it's because you were too attached to your son. I don't know how they said that whether it was a good thing or a bad thing, but it made me feel guilty a little bit that what am I not supposed to be that attached is like dunya is like your children are supposed to be attached to them. But then I read in sort of use of how Jacobo SLM had extreme attachment to you to use of Jacoba some to use a company I mean, and you know, subhanAllah you're allowed to

and when you see that, that pain turns into strength, that missing in that extreme connection turns into strength brothers and sisters. But you have to you have to have that divine support.

And lastly,

one of the most important things out of all of this is you get to feel Allah's presence may apply

that your call buddies, Sam says facade button Jimmy will live in Staten Island Joseph one. Obviously his sons were saying a lot of hurtful things. And he said I will exercise beautiful patience

and beautiful patience means that when a person truly

and only directs his or her pain and inner real feelings to Allah subhanho wa Taala as for in front of people, they put on a face and that's okay you can put on your face you can keep smiling you can keep going. But you know that when you come back home that night, it's you and Allah and that's called Beautiful patients that your complaint and you're in a respectful way when I say complaints, I meant Oh Allah I complained to you my sorrow I complained to you my service I complained to you my pain, my grief, you know what I'm going through. Sometimes I just make a search there for about 45 minutes saying nothing, just crying. Because I know that Allah knows what I'm trying to say and I

don't know how to say. So the Southern Gentleman insha Allah and I think this is something I connected with Prophet jacobellis.

Somebody Dear brothers and sisters. Finally, the verse of the Quran, which really hit me was when he said to his children when they came back and Binyomin had been taken

and made diakonia Salam go blind finally. He said to them, whether they assume or Rohin in

in hola

como que

si that really hit me tremendously what he said

Oh, my son's don't lose hope. Don't despair. Don't give up

on the mercy

and,

you know, on the mercy and kindness and closeness of Allah subhanho wa taala.

He's always the he knows what you're going through. The only people who have despair and lose hope from the Mercy of Allah, other people who don't believe in His mercy, the ones who are denying

I lost my dad his mercy and his love and his closeness to you and that he's always there for you.

And that's the certainty that's the opinion.

So till today and forever Insha Allah, this is my situation. And I hope that the listeners have benefited in some way. I ask Allah Subhana Allah to relieve everyone's, all my brothers, sisters and people around the world, their pain, their grief, whatever they're going through, to assist them and support them as a last man that has supported me, turned to him, I deepened, the sisters turned to him, and give your heart to Him, connect with the Quran. And if you do that, I hope you're up that the Quran will be reading you and you will also find this amazing paradise, which Allah has made on this earth, which is not money, it's not fame, it's not status. It's this. And if you can find it,

then you'll feel a taste as if you can smell the paradise in the hereafter in shell. So the law had been hammered lighter, earlier or sloppy. He

was like, Oh my gosh, I'm gonna man last pants and bless you

and increase you and

reward you for

being willing to share in the midst of I'm sure it's not easy for you to tell the story over and over again. So I'm gonna reward you and

have mercy on your son and your brother in law. Who in Philadelphia

and allow other people to find comfort through this that have gone through this devastation? Yeah, heavy.

Okay, my dear father, actually we're talking about

lost pounds, I protect them and preserve them ship

me from the love you have anything you want to share?

Ask him.

There's a lot I mean, Subhan, Allah

Subhan Allah. I mean, just

one thing that you mentioned about the soldier

and I think it's

befitting to mention that for all of us as Muslims that you know, sometimes you're, you know, these to us that you that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that the Prophet alayhi wa sallam said, but sometimes you don't remember them, because of this, the intensity of the emotion that you're going through while you're making the DUA. It's like flashbacks of things that are happening in your life, to where you don't know what to say, you know, and just that advice that you gave us. And just to remind all of you that, you know, in those times of vulnerability, and those times of your heart just being pierced, and broken and open, don't worry about when am I when I'm when I'm

supposed to say just go? Just go in your in your search, they're just saying, you call him his name's called on Allah subhanaw taala. Don't think too much about what I'm supposed to say yes, with the proper salatu, Salam said, was most eloquent. And it's a German man, it's comprehensive. And it's very eloquent. And it's the best, you know, actualization of understanding the names and attributes of Allah. But sometimes it's so intense, he'll know what to say. And I love the fact that you said that, because it brings comfort to a lot of the muscles that may not have known these to ask a lot of youth that may not know what to say. So, you know, I've talked to some youth, they say,

Well, I don't know what to say, and do I, so I don't make and they hold those emotions inside. But it's important to just go, go and such, and stay there and have flashbacks, and try your best to remember those moments to where you didn't want to remember them. And to be as vulnerable as you can for the sake of Allah subhanho wa taala. Because vulnerability is the key to its unlocking the doors to getting closer to him And subhanAllah you know, as you mentioned, and this was a means that Allah subhanaw taala used to bring you closer to him via the dreams, and then the actions of worship, that you you acted on or responded, based on those dreams, may Allah subhanaw taala preserve and preserve

them in raising the Lena in saying that when you talked about the soldier and not knowing what to say, I'm going to share this as well. I think it will help a lot of people

you know how they say the best or art is seeking, you know, copying the data of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam, from the Sunnah. And that is true, that is true. But ironically, for me that time, I just said whatever came up from my heart,

and the daughters of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam I use them. But I had to understand what they mean first, because how was the diet? How was the diet accepted? And how is the diet really meaningful? It's when it comes from within you need to feel it and know what you're actually saying. So I want to say to my brothers sisters that you don't have to memorize all those dogs you learned at school or your parents taught you or the Imam taught you or you know, some people grab Muslim Muslim for example fortress, the Muslim which is an amazing book of the Quran. And they go through those diets. Some people say to me, what should I say?

Under times of sadness and fear and everything and you give them the Sunnah, doors, it's amazing. But also add to that your own like talk talk to a lot genuinely from your heart. And you don't have to talk it in Arabic, you can say it in any language. Sometimes you can just as I said, Just cry with feelings, and they mean a lot. Because Allah Eileen, he really knows exactly what you know what's traveling through you. And one more thing, you know, that time when I came back to Australia, Sheikh Abdullah, it happened to be COVID. Right after that, the world went into isolation,

I still can't put up, I still can't understand that part was it.

I don't understand Subhan Allah because that's exactly what I needed. I needed to go into isolation a bit away from the distractions of the world. I need to go through grief, I just needed family. And that moment gave me time, where I didn't have to go to Torah within a masjid. And always be leaning Imam here and meeting with people, which is amazing. But sometimes you need you really need that time to yourself. And I get I got to pray my time away. As long as I wanted to do my sushi dinner night prayer as long as I wanted, say whatever I wanted without someone telling me Hurry up, or we've got work tomorrow or people are tired. You just so I advise mum and sisters actually, as you

go to the masjid. It's it connects you with your community and your identity. And it motivates you. But also leave some time for yourself, even a couple of cards that you can pray at home just by yourselves. And stay as long as you want. Say whatever you want. Cry as much as you want talk as much as you want with a last minute data, it has a profound effect. So I just want to say about that.

So

it just want to mention one thing, there was one thing that surprised like, you know, just mentioning this what you said against upon. I remember the night that I came home before I became a Muslim. And I got into a big argument with my mother because I came home like around three in the morning. And I shut my door. And then I just dropped on my knees. And all I was saying was please God, please God, please. I didn't know what to say. All I knew was please God just guide me. I know what I'm not doing. It's not right. Please play out. You know, I had my hands class, you know, because I was Christian. Please, please, please tears running down my face. And then, you know about

a week or two weeks later, I became a Muslim. You convert you reverted or converted to Islam. Yes, yes. Sheikh Abdullah didn't know that Subhan Allah. Yes.

Yes, Allah accepted from

now Subhanallah and truth belonging, you're talking about the

you know, those signs that you look for.

So it's probably the most painful loss I've ever encountered was the loss of my mother or him online. That's nothing like losing a child and losing a brother, especially the way that you encountered it. And

in your vision, love. Each one has its own

issues shuffle, not I mean, we all go through the same grief in the same process, whether it's your mother or your child or your father. They're just different groups.

And it's not that most union let me know, you're talking about the looking for a sign. So I actually just share something recently Subhanallah that that happened that was just, I mean, it was it was incredible. It might be something small people might say this isn't.

But you know, you're grieving, you look for things.

So I wrote this book.

Actually here for those left behind. This was a series that I did

guidance on death and breathing. There's actually a series that I did, or for European 2021 COVID happened and it's like the journey of the soul and how you how you grieve and how you stay connected to a person after they pass away. And that was inspired by your your experience.

And subhanAllah I actually mentioned in the beginning, I wrote I wrote the introduction. And I dedicated to my mother allied hammer. And I talked about why where this book came from. And so I went on Amazon.

So cube publishing published it. And I wrote it. I finished it last year.

And I noticed the date

of sale February 21.

And I thought to myself Subhanallah so this is back in like September. I'm like why is it February 21.

And February 21 is my mother's birthday letter.

So actually it was a

I actually message the brothers. I keep those like Did you know that? Like where did the date February 21. Come from subpanel. That's

that's what we're talking about that subjective

personal guidance that was planted

It comes to you with Yeah, and you understand it Subhanallah we all get some of it. Absolutely

beautiful chef Omar it's it's beautiful that

not only

not only other, you know, just Quran and Hadith and things, but there's also this things are happening still now. You know as wrestlers as I'm told us that the dreams are a portion of

prophecy of what the prophets left behind

and of a portion of what he that our last panel dialogue continues to connect with you on a personal level.

This continues to funnel now it doesn't leave his creation, you know, feeds us so leave him silly.

Why not relying on that

and return us back to them in a beautiful way Shepard I could we could talk to you for hours. And we appreciate you more than you know. And I pray that everyone who watches this if you can take a moment to make your app for sure to offer his family inshallah Tada see my family and every Muslim around the world brothers and sisters, every Muslim around the world is you know, those who are suffering as well not just me, I lost the honor

of forgiveness and mercy and ease the suffering and pain of all our brothers and sisters around the world. There are people who have lost their entire families Yachty

every person that ever knew so ALS is simple compared to when we hear about the tragedies of other people.

So may Allah subhanaw taala reward everyone for their struggles and their efforts and their patients and nothing goes

nothing nothing just goes away almost pantalla counts everything and everything is in a record. Everyone is compensated and share a lot of data just have that faith and that belief.

Somewhere like my friends like Lakeisha candelas

is like a local area Sheikh Abdullah It was a pleasure. Honors all my chicken was all my Redcliff those those are giving you get a chance to watch his video. Just type his name watch the video the stories online was very impactful. shed many tears every time that I'm watching Subhanallah

remember synyo da salaam Malik