Save Your Family

Ali Albarghouthi


Channel: Ali Albarghouthi

File Size: 25.02MB

Share Page


WARNING!!! AI generated text may display inaccurate or offensive information that doesn’t represent Muslim Central's views. Therefore, no part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.

AI Generated Summary ©

The importance of protecting oneself from hellfire and the need for a holla at graduation is emphasized, as it is crucial for a healthy life. The speakers emphasize the importance of protecting one's religious and moral values, particularly when children are lacking in schooling. The importance of learning one's religion and practicing it to avoid immorality, and being models of Islam and engaging in one's own religion is emphasized. The structure of a family structure is discussed, where a woman may say "-levels of joy" to her husband, as long as the husband is good and she'll act. The speakers emphasize the importance of not listening to anyone and not trying to convince them to change their behavior.

AI Generated Transcript ©

00:00:03--> 00:00:16

Who wants to fuel win over the winner Himanshu rhodian fusina or Crtl Medina miyetti Hilda who Furlong will Linda? Warmer usually further her D.

00:00:17--> 00:00:28

Wash has wonder EDA Illallah who had the hula Cherie kala one number Hamedan who are soo sallallahu alayhi wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa salam,

00:00:29--> 00:00:46

a MOBA Adelphia in the halal Hadith the Kitab Allah heeta Anna well here on Hedy had you Mohammed in sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, we shall remove or remove data to her or coulomb data team be the Aquila be the atom bada aku love Allah Allah team fina

00:00:48--> 00:00:51

about Allah azza wa jal

00:00:52--> 00:00:57

said in the Quran, to and full circle mwah Alikum now

00:00:59--> 00:01:02

protect yourselves and your families from hellfire.

00:01:04--> 00:01:08

That is Allah had made it a primary objective.

00:01:09--> 00:01:12

That as you are thinking about your future,

00:01:13--> 00:01:18

you you'd ask yourself, How can I protect myself from hellfire.

00:01:19--> 00:01:25

But it doesn't stop there because your responsibility extends to the family that you have.

00:01:26--> 00:01:44

That you decided to have and form your spouse, your children. Also they needed to be protected from hellfire. And both parents will be asked about this, not only about yourself, but about them as well.

00:01:45--> 00:02:01

How do I protect my spouse from hellfire? What am I doing? How do I protect my children from hellfire? What am I doing to those to that effect? And the prophets Allah Allah Azza wa sallam said in the Hadith Kulu, Qumran

00:02:02--> 00:02:41

Masuda, Namrata, Yeti, each one of you is a shepherd, and you won't be responsible for your flock for people who are under you You're responsible for so the man the husband will be asked about the family not only about himself, but the family, the wife and the children. What did you teach? What did you guide? What did you bring your money from? Where are you equitable, just or not? You'll be asked about this. And the wife the mother will be asked about how she was with her husband and how she was with her children. Was she equitable, just kind merciful, pleasing to Allah or not.

00:02:43--> 00:03:01

Now there are financial responsibilities. And these are important. And the only thing I want to say about that is that as you are struggling to provide for your family, remember that this is with the right intentions you had for the sake of Allah azza wa jal

00:03:03--> 00:03:08

once the Sahaba next to the prophets of Allah, he was in them they saw a young man

00:03:09--> 00:03:13

and he was strong and he was working hard.

00:03:14--> 00:03:17

And they said if only this was he sebelah

00:03:19--> 00:03:24

this have only this effort that strength were used. FISA, Belinda?

00:03:25--> 00:03:36

And typically FISA Barilla means jihad. So the prophets, Allah Salam said, and this is an authentic hadith, he said, Do you only consider FISA vilella If there is fighting,

00:03:38--> 00:03:44

he said, if he's working, to suffice his parents and spend on them. This is visa vie Leila.

00:03:46--> 00:04:03

And if he is working to suffice, his family and his children to keep them chaste. So then they don't have to beg and ask other people or go to the haram. That is visa vie, Linda, and if he's working to keep himself chaste, and sufficient, that is visa vie, Linda.

00:04:04--> 00:04:09

So especially today, if you're going out and trying to find work or working,

00:04:11--> 00:04:13

do your best turn only from Hala.

00:04:14--> 00:04:29

And if you do this, this is your jihad. And if this is your jihad, it will take you to gender by the will of Allah azza wa jal But consider a jihad because it's not easy today to learn only holla at the temptations are plenty.

00:04:31--> 00:04:38

And also think about that whatever you spend on yourself, on your wife, on the children,

00:04:39--> 00:04:40

it is sadaqa

00:04:42--> 00:04:52

and by sadaqa, we don't mean something that devotes them or you know, rewardable that's what it means. So he said Sal, Allahu Allah was in them whatever you spent

00:04:53--> 00:04:59

just seeking Allah's pleasure with it, Allah reward you for it, even what you put in your wife's mouth.

00:05:00--> 00:05:11

So if you earn something and you eat it yourself with the right intention, Allah rewards you for it, you earn and you bring back to your wife is a cook.

00:05:12--> 00:05:22

Allah rewards you for that when the wife cooks and gives it to the family with the right intention, Allah rewards you for it. And because it's not easy, all of this is jihad.

00:05:23--> 00:05:29

And when you spend on your family, on your children, this is jihad. And this child that you are going to have

00:05:31--> 00:05:33

is a pathway to Jannah

00:05:35--> 00:05:38

it's not just simply another mouth to feed.

00:05:39--> 00:05:54

But a path to Jannah. You know very well the Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa alayhi wa sallam that he said about the continuous charity, wonderful side, the four year doula, a righteous child that makes the ad for you.

00:05:56--> 00:06:02

And this is in many ways equivalent to the other two, because the other two is what you leave behind.

00:06:04--> 00:06:09

A beneficial religious knowledge, seeking knowledge is jihad difficult, it's not easy,

00:06:10--> 00:06:19

or a righteous charity that is continuous that stays after your death. Spending money is not easy.

00:06:20--> 00:06:30

Right? You have to struggle to spend money. And the third one is that you take care of a child and you make sure that they are righteous,

00:06:31--> 00:06:35

and they stay behind and they make dua for you, that takes you

00:06:37--> 00:07:03

or that is a continuous sadaqa that stays behind. And in particular, the prophets Allah Allah Azza wa sallam said about girls, female children. He said some a lot he was telling me if you have three girls, daughters, and you provide for them, terms of clothing, food, and you're patient with them, they will be your protection from hellfire hijab.

00:07:05--> 00:07:09

woman asked and two daughters are prophet of Allah and he's then two daughters.

00:07:10--> 00:07:41

And he said In another Hadith sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he said, if two daughters of yours reached puberty, and they're right next to you, and you're taking care of them, providing for them, what? Better Hoonah that is, you're a good companion to them. You treat them kindly. You teach them you're patient and kind in Tahoe Jana, except that they will admit him to Jana, as long as he does that, and they were right next to him until they one of them dies or they get married.

00:07:42--> 00:07:55

And the scholars that said that the virtue of having daughters is greater in Islam than having sons. Well, if you call in higher, there's good in both. But the virtue that is mentioned about having daughters is greater.

00:07:57--> 00:08:08

So Subhanallah it's not just a family, this is your Jihad and a way for you to enter Janna. But that's the financial side of it, aspect of it.

00:08:09--> 00:08:12

What is even more important than that is the religious side.

00:08:14--> 00:08:34

We usually think about taking care of our families in terms of providing for them, I go out I owe money I bring back and I feed and I close. That's my responsibility. But a greater and a more important responsibility is protecting them from hellfire. Not only feeding their bodies, but feeding their souls.

00:08:35--> 00:08:48

And especially at these times, where the whole world is trying to teach your children something that contradicts the Quran and the Sunnah, you cannot sit back and let the world teach them whatever it wants.

00:08:49--> 00:09:08

You can't let the phone be your child's companion. You can love them learn from whatever they see on social media or online. You can let the world send messages constant messages about this is okay, this is fine. And you're sitting back thinking that you're not responsible to teach.

00:09:10--> 00:09:14

If you find your child failing or lacking in worldly studies, what do you do?

00:09:16--> 00:09:58

You rush, you teach, you hire tutors, you meet with their teachers. But if your child is lacking in religious understanding, and religious practice, what is it that you do? Because Allah will ask you, you sat back and they taught her and him all of these things. And he didn't teach them about salah. I didn't teach them about Hijab you didn't teach them about the Allah as though it didn't. It didn't teach them how to love Allah and His prophets of Allah Allah was it? No, it didn't teach him what the Sunnah is. So if they grew up and you thought you were fulfilling your responsibility by simply bringing in money, they go up, and they don't know Islam, and they're not interested in religion.

00:09:58--> 00:09:59

They're not interested in the Quran.

00:10:00--> 00:10:01

Not interested in the Sunnah.

00:10:03--> 00:10:12

Have you performed your responsibility? Well, when you have forsaken your children like that, when you care more about the dunya than the Earth Hera,

00:10:13--> 00:10:15

Allah azza wa jal is going to ask.

00:10:17--> 00:10:20

So hear alarm bells are supposed to sound.

00:10:22--> 00:10:48

You see a tsunami of morality in the world today, what was now okay reprehensible 510 years ago is not so today and not only among non Muslims among Muslims as well as being pushed on you. And if you think that you are safe, you have to think twice about your children who grew up with these immorality normalized.

00:10:49--> 00:10:52

And you have to mount a counter effort.

00:10:53--> 00:10:57

And for that, you need to do what you need to learn your religion yourself.

00:10:59--> 00:11:08

You need to understand it, you need to practice it, you need to come to the masjid, you need to invest in Islamic institutions, you need to talk to your child.

00:11:09--> 00:11:18

You need to engage them at an early age and teach them why do they believe in all of this? Why do they pray? Why do they fast?

00:11:20--> 00:11:25

And model Islam and moral good manners?

00:11:26--> 00:11:37

Because only in this way, will you be able to at least have a fighting chance among all of this immorality around us, and maybe save a child.

00:11:38--> 00:11:51

And if you can say the child who believes in Allah and His Prophet Sall, Allahu Allah you are you are selling them and they are pleasing to Him, then all what they do, will be in your book of records.

00:11:53--> 00:11:56

And that is a way for you to enter Jannah.

00:11:57--> 00:11:58

So today,

00:12:00--> 00:12:02

maybe a lot of us feel helpless,

00:12:03--> 00:12:15

in the face of all the corruption in the world. And you think that you too small and insignificant, what can I do? To fight all of this? I'm simple, a simple man. I'm a simple woman.

00:12:16--> 00:12:18

I have a limited reach.

00:12:19--> 00:12:36

The answer to that is if you can take care of yourself and be pleasing to Allah and simply take care of a family and make it pleasing to Allah, meaning fix yourself and fix your family. You've done your job. Just take care of yourself and your family.

00:12:38--> 00:12:57

And if each person does that, we will be better, better community and better. But it starts with the family and it starts with you noticing how and what your children are doing. A whole holy had was the hula Do you want to go for stuff?

00:13:01--> 00:13:01


00:13:15--> 00:13:58

hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen handeln cathedral to even Mubarak and fee who also Lee Watson the model Rasulullah Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa sallam. Of course, you can raise good children until you yourself are good. Until the relationship that you have with your spouse is a good relationship. And only then will he be able to model whatever you model. But if you are all constantly fighting, if you're exhibiting the worst of manners and character, it is very difficult for you to instruct somebody else and tell them to act or behave in a better way. So for the man, for the woman, for the husband and for the wife, you have to observe Allah's commands in this

00:13:58--> 00:14:23

marriage and know that this is a union that Allah azza wa jal can bless. If you act according to the pleasure of Allah azza wa jal, and that blessing can go away if you displease Allah azza wa jal, think about it. Allah azza wa jal had made this family a second tranquility. And Allah Otto did had put in it my word Ditton, Rama, meaning that there is love and mercy in it. So when you are about to choose,

00:14:24--> 00:14:43

or you have chosen already, and you're looking at your spouse, consider that Allah azza wa jal had created Eve from Adam. And he could have created Eve separately, but so that there is great harmony between them. Eve is a piece of Adam, right?

00:14:44--> 00:14:49

You think of your wife as a piece of you and she thinks of you as a piece of her.

00:14:51--> 00:14:55

It's not a conflict based relationship.

00:14:57--> 00:14:59

It's not one based on I only want my

00:15:00--> 00:15:08

rites, but none of the duties I demand but I don't give. I want to be forgiven by the Rwanda forgive

00:15:09--> 00:15:22

about the death of all the Allah who I know when he spoke to his wife, he said either other food for the whale to fold the queue in the longest drive he says, If I'm angry, placate me.

00:15:23--> 00:15:25

And if you get angry, I'll placate you.

00:15:27--> 00:15:29

Otherwise we can stay together.

00:15:30--> 00:15:50

Well, the whole name is Larry Allah hinda Bill roofer was the Phil says about woman. It says they have responsibilities, like the duties that they have, or rights and duties. So yes, you have rights, but you have responsibilities as well. And before you say I want my rights you have to be willing to give

00:15:51--> 00:15:56

to the other. Before you say Where is mine, you have to be willing to give

00:15:59--> 00:16:01

and not simply demand over

00:16:03--> 00:16:11

what you're willing to perform. Otherwise it's unjust. So the prophets, Allah azza wa jal says why she wouldn't have been my roof.

00:16:12--> 00:16:16

He says, Keep good company,

00:16:17--> 00:16:22

with your woman, be a good companion to them. Thank goodness.

00:16:25--> 00:16:27

It says if you hate something about them,

00:16:28--> 00:16:50

maybe you could you hate something, but there will be great benefit in it. The prophets a lot he was salam said in the Hadith, he says I believe in man does not he that he hates a believing woman. If he hates something about her, he looks at other things that he likes. That's equity and justice. Your wife will not have everything

00:16:51--> 00:17:07

and your husband is not going to have everything. But when you look at them, look at the whole package. Look at the good but also the bad and the judge like that. And if there is something bad, pray to Allah that Allah will take care of it. Don't simply just

00:17:08--> 00:17:33

and if they don't give you your right don't simply say then I'm not gonna perform my responsibilities No, do it for the sake of Allah azza wa jal not for the sake of the another human being. You did for you understand the difference. If you are in a relationship, simply for the sake of the other person, you're not gonna give them until they give you right? If you're in a relationship with the sake of Allah azza wa jal, you will give despite what they do,

00:17:36--> 00:17:38

and leave the rest to Allah azza wa jal

00:17:40--> 00:17:43

and if there's something that you need, ask it from Allah azza wa jal.

00:17:46--> 00:17:48

So a man is supposed to be the leader

00:17:50--> 00:17:50

to guide

00:17:53--> 00:17:57

and he's supposed to take care of her religiously and she's supposed to take care of him religiously.

00:17:59--> 00:18:21

In one Hadith, the prophets of Allah Azza wa sallam you said, If a man wakes up at night, and he wakes up his wife, and they pray together to rock as they will be written among those who remember Allah often evacuating Allah Cathy along with that Kira, simply, he wakes up for Salah at night, and he or he wakes up his wife which is free two hours together.

00:18:22--> 00:18:33

You will not believe the amount of Baraka that Allah will put in such a family when they do this. The amount of mercy and love that Allah will give to their family when they do this, when they please Allah

00:18:35--> 00:18:37

and then Allah azza wa jal will please them.

00:18:38--> 00:19:14

In another Hadith, the prophets a lot he was in love said, may Allah have mercy on a man who wakes up for Salah and wakes up his woman to pray. And if she does not want to wake up, he takes water, splashes it on her face, and wakes her up. And May Allah's mercy be upon a woman who wakes up at night to free and wakes her husband, and if he does not want to wake up, he takes some water, splashes it on his face so that he can wake up. Sophia and said does not mean you really splash but take some white what's her hand and wipe it over his face? The same thing for the husband to gently wake him up.

00:19:16--> 00:19:25

That's the basis of that relationship, a relationship that looks at Allah azza wa jal and what pleases Him not at ego.

00:19:27--> 00:19:34

How? Why should I be the one who apologize? Why should I be the one who concedes he's wrong? She's wrong.

00:19:36--> 00:19:40

That's not the relationship that Allah azza wa jal wants from you. And there's a hadith to that effect.

00:19:43--> 00:19:46

He said, so Allah Allah He was in them.

00:19:47--> 00:19:49

That a woman of paradise

00:19:51--> 00:19:52

on Hulu, dude,

00:19:54--> 00:19:59

dude, the loving wife loves her husband and she acts with love

00:20:01--> 00:20:05

elude gives birth alot. If Allah permits it, of course,

00:20:06--> 00:20:14

allowed that she benefits her husband completely all the time. She brings him benefits secures his benefit.

00:20:16--> 00:20:17

I let in Habiba

00:20:19--> 00:20:23

with you require embodiment, that is when he or her husband becomes angry.

00:20:25--> 00:20:27

Or another narration it says when she had been wronged,

00:20:28--> 00:20:30

meaning he's wrong.

00:20:32--> 00:20:41

That she came, she comes, she puts her hand in his hand. And she said, I will not sleep until you're happy again.

00:20:43--> 00:20:44

Although he's wrong.

00:20:47--> 00:20:49

So they choose not about ego.

00:20:50--> 00:21:03

They choose what pleases Allah at this moment, to sleep angry, to keep fighting, not to talk to each other, or to simply eliminate

00:21:04--> 00:21:12

the whispers of the shaytaan as soon as possible. And you say, I'm gonna go and make sure that he's happy again, and he's not angry.

00:21:13--> 00:21:20

And I want to tell you that if a wife does that with a husband, as long as that husband is good natured, he'll change

00:21:22--> 00:21:24

because he will know how good she is to him.

00:21:26--> 00:21:31

And he will act. In a similar fashion you will be teaching your husband how to act.

00:21:32--> 00:21:46

In other Hadith the prophets of Allah Allah He was seldom said and this is in an age where everybody wants to be on top. He said, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, that it assumed that in order to Hamsa if a woman prays the five daily prayers, she fasts from Oban.

00:21:49--> 00:21:50

And she's che chased

00:21:51--> 00:21:59

as She obeys her husband. On the day of judgment, He will be told and to Jana, from whatever door you want to enter gender from.

00:22:02--> 00:22:04

So for a wife, this is her jihad.

00:22:07--> 00:22:16

As it is for a husband when he goes outside, that is his jihad. But inside the home, this is your jihad. And a woman may say, Why should I be subservient to him?

00:22:18--> 00:22:21

Why should I listen to him? Why should I obey Him?

00:22:22--> 00:22:41

And I realized that there are husbands who misuse their power or not ideal, who are sinful and unjust, I realized that but that structure this family structure is a divine structure. It's not one that is made up by humanity.

00:22:42--> 00:22:54

Where the husband does with a woman does. Allah azza wa jal instructed us, you cannot eliminate you can advise you can bring us back to what Allah wanted, but you cannot eliminate that structure. You cannot tweak it.

00:22:56--> 00:23:11

So when Allah azza wa jal and His Prophet sallallahu Sallam say obey her husband. It doesn't mean that as long as what is said, is pleasing to Allah azza wa jal, and if you think that is the meaning you're not really listening to him, you're listening to who?

00:23:13--> 00:23:20

Listening to Allah azza wa jal. Otherwise, why would you listen to him? Otherwise, why would you listen to any other human being?

00:23:22--> 00:23:30

And by the way, practically, realistically, each one of us is subservient to somebody else, by the way. You think about it.

00:23:31--> 00:23:35

There's always somebody who's above you that who tells you what to do and you do it right.

00:23:37--> 00:23:56

You your employer, the government regulations, you say yes, sir. There is no option. So everybody is subservient, except that this type of listening to is mandated by Allah azza wa jal. So don't listen to any man. And we're not saying this because we're men.

00:23:58--> 00:24:00

We're saying this because this is pleasing to Allah xuejun.

00:24:01--> 00:24:06

And we're saying this because that's the way that you save the family.

00:24:07--> 00:24:19

So may Allah azza wa jal allow us to see the wisdom and whatever Allah is due to have commanded. Take care of your family. And see how you can be a better husband learn it.

00:24:20--> 00:24:23

And see how you can be a better wife learn it.

00:24:24--> 00:24:30

As questions, see how you can become a better parent. It's not automatic.

00:24:31--> 00:24:41

You need to go and ask. And if you found yourself lacking teach yourself how to become a better parent and can't continuously make dua.

00:24:44--> 00:24:44


00:24:46--> 00:24:47

Rahim, Allah,

00:24:48--> 00:24:56

He said yeah, Allah whatever whatever swimming is dry he said, Yeah, Allah I tried to discipline educate my son Ali, I cannot you do that for me?

00:24:57--> 00:25:00

And it said it was fixed by the will of

00:25:00--> 00:25:42

Allah azza wa jal meaning it's not sufficient for you to put all the effort that you have you need to. But then with that, what do you need to do? Allah azza wa jal. So if you have family problems, family issues, family complications, your husband is bad as this and that your wife is bad and this and that your little kids are not listening to you, do your best, but elicit the help of Allah xuejun Because Allah could change everything if he wants. So as Allah Amara, I mean to bless our families, and make them families that are pleasing to Allah azza wa jal ya allah teach us how to be better husbands and better wives and better Children, obey Allah azza wa jal make our families

00:25:42--> 00:26:21

families in this dunya and families in Jana I mean Europe and Ireland we put in our family serenity and peace and wisdom, make love without my component and our families out but I mean you're Allah teach us what we need from our religion and make us educators to teach our children what they need from our religion. But I mean, forgive us all of our sins that we know about and that which we do not know about protect us from all leppington yada but LME makers steadfast and strong upon that your faith upon the Sunnah of your prophets of Allah Allah yours Allah, protect us from the whispers of the shaytaan protect us from the temptation of this dunya Allahumma tuna for dunya Hassan Ophelia

00:26:21--> 00:27:02

karate Hassan a Latina either now Allah may Allah liberal Paulo with a bit glue banana de la Maya Masada Kulu Kulu banana and aqua Arctic Allahumma Vickery Cara Niconico Shoukry co host near Eva lytic Allahu Manas Luca Jin Neto Makarova, la Hammond COVID environment, what is our od becoming a nerdy Omar kurabe Herman COVID environment when a surgical hayleigh kula who hygena who de la ma I mean, who am an alum when are all the becoming a share equally he agita? He was a god, man. I mean, who am I? What does that look I'm in Haiti, Masada Abdullah Mohammed on sallallahu alayhi wa sallam when we came in Sheree Mr. Dukkha Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. One of them is Salah.