Channel: Abu Abdissalam
Episode 9/26: Backbiting (Part 3/3)
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backbiting woo to every kind of scandal monger, and back biter.
Assalamualaikum and welcome to another episode of purification of the soul.
We're talking in the previous episode about backbiting and about some of the ways of curing ourselves from this evil disease, of backbiting. And we mentioned some of the, firstly, we mentioned the definition of backbiting, who can remind us about the definition of backbiting, Muhammad, that person is when someone says something
against a person which he does not look exactly. And this is something this is something that we need to repeat over and over again, to understand and what's not the definition of backbiting. Good was not that said behind the back? Yes, that's one misconception. People think that backbiting or Riba in Islam is to is only impermissible if is done behind the person's back. But what if the person doesn't like that you say something good about him. still regarded? That's not bad. But if it's something that's good about him, and it's well known that everybody understands. So for example, you speak about a brother and you say, Yes, he's, he's very nice, brother. Okay, he's very
generous kind. Maybe he feels that if someone speaks about me like this, I will, it may change my intention. In that case, it's it's permissible to say that, but we should avoid saying it to the person's face when you're speaking good about someone. So that's not backbiting. So that's one misconception. Now, it should be noted that backbiting is allowed, in certain situations in certain if,
if reasons, if the reasons why it's allowed cannot be achieved by any other way. And any other legal means, animal? No, no, we are human law. He mentioned this, in his famous book, real de Sala hain. And in there, he mentioned six different reasons for why it is permissible to backbite the person, the first of that is to complain of oppression. So it's permissible for the person who's been oppressed, to present his case to the Muslim ruler, or the Muslim judge or someone of similar authority to assist in removing the oppression. So obviously, our pastor can't go and lie and speak because that would be slander. But we're talking about backbiting. In other words, mentioning your
brother, or your sister in Islam with something that they don't like. So one can do that in front of the Muslim ruler. So again, let's have an example of that hung over.
Some someone's trying to find the crook ruling. On a certain issues. Let's look at an example of this case where you're going to a judge. And you ask him question, why would you be allowed to backbite in that situation, if that's the only means to achieve the full description of the person? So that's one one reason yet to get a description of the person grows another reason?
Because if a person withholds the information, fearing backbiting, then the judge will not be able to come to a conclusion with the facts available to him. Yeah, so let's take an example. I mean, what could a person say to the judge? For example, if someone hits him, if someone hits him, yeah, well, he can see what exactly happened exactly that the person by name, he can say the Buckaroo ama. He hit me. And therefore, this is allowed. It's a court in Islam and Islamic court, of course, and this is allowed in front of the Muslim judge, a Muslim ruler.
The next reason is, when is allowed to backbite is to seek assistance in changing the evil and returning the person who's disobey disobeying Allah to the right path. Okay, now there's a difference what is the difference between this and the previous situation about the court
between between the two
Separation we said is allowed to go to a party, a judge, Muslim judge and say so and so hit me. Okay, so in this situation, he's taking a right he's trying to get back his right. Okay, or remove the oppression. But in this situation we said, to seek assistance in changing an evil or this or someone who's disobeying a boss panatela. What's the difference?
That and the first one is reclaiming the right. And the second one is, is changing and evil is no good. So let's have an example of how you do that. How do you change an evil by backbiting?
For example, you might see a certain certain speaker or she is saying certain bad things. Certain misguiding the people. So you have to mention to the people, that what he's saying is wrong. Yes, one last warning against the evil witch was going to come but it's not quite what we're talking about her. What we're talking about here is when a person
let's say, I see somebody smoking. And as we know, in Islam, smoking is not permissible. Allah says in the Quran, volatile code, the ad, Camilla taluka, don't lead, don't let your own hands lead to killing yourself into destruction. And of course, at the back of the cigarette packs in many countries that says Smoking kills. Okay, so this is a clear example of where person is taking with his own hands. He's leaving himself to destruction. So smoking is haram. So we saw somebody, let's say, who is smoking, and perhaps, the person, he may, maybe he won't listen to me. He doesn't know me, maybe he may not listen to me. So it is permissible for me to go to somebody else who knows him
and said, hey, you're a friend of that brother. And I love him for the sake of Allah. And he's a really nice guy. But he has one habit that we need to stop for the sake of Allah, can you please advise him to stop smoking? Okay, this is this may be a permissible, this is a permissible form of backbiting, because you're trying to change the evil. This is different from the court case scenario, where you're trying to get your own right back. There, this is one of our laws, right? You want to stop an evil? Okay, is that clear the difference between that?
The third, the next point
is to find out about a religious ruling on a matter again, this is slightly different. So for example, someone can go to a scholar and say to the scholar, look, what is the ruling on my, let's say, my father, who doesn't give me enough money? Okay. And he can mention that ruling? Or what is the ruling, a wife can go and say, What is the ruling on a husband on my husband, because he doesn't give me so and so he doesn't give his rights, give my rights to me. And this isn't an example. And so this is permissible by necessity. But it's safer in these cases. In this case, in particular, that you would say something like, what do you say regarding a man or person or husband, if this is
his condition? Okay, so rather than mentioning his name, it's safer to mention, just what about a person general being general cipher to be general rather than specifically mentioned by name, so he can obtain his purpose without actually naming the person? nonetheless, it's if you do mention a person's name, then this is permissible, and this is shown in the hadith of eyeshot of the lava unha who related that hint, the wife of Abu Sufyan are the Allahu anhu, much mind set to the Messenger of Allah sallallahu Sallam Abu Sophia is stingy his miserly, and he does not give me enough to suffice me and my children unless I take something from his property, without his knowledge, and then the
prophets will Isom said, take enough to suffice you and your children, according to what is usual, what is the norm? So you can see where did she backbite in this case,
by uttering the truth by telling promises the Prophet Muhammad SAW solemn what he's doing, which is he was being stingy. Yes, yeah. He was being stingy or miserly. And so this is where she is back button and she did it in front of whom? The problem
and there's a general rule in Islam, that if something happens in the presence of the prophets lie Selim, if he does not agree with it, if it's something haram or something against Islam, then he has to speak against it. Here the prophet SAW some did not speak against what she did. So this shows in this situation is allowed to back by how by asking a fatwa, you're asking a fatwa religious verdict. Oh, Chef, my husband doesn't give me enough money. Okay. So I take it without his knowledge. Normally this would be considered stealing, but in this situation, that
You know, he's not giving enough money and maybe she's starving or something like this not doesn't have enough food, enough clothing for her and her children, she's allowed to take enough that suffices that according to the norm,
and we better mention here a close, because before the I start getting
complaints from some of the brothers that their wives are stealing money from them, there's a closer and that is that the husband doesn't give them enough money to the wife for the basic necessities, food, basic clothing, not a huge wardrobe. But basic clothing, these kind of things is permissible to go to the
to the coffee, for example, and ask or to a scholar, what's the ruling on me taking this, the next point is to warn against warn the Muslims from evil and to advise them, okay, and this can be done in a number of matters is not necessarily changing the evil, which is what we mentioned earlier on. But this is about warning people from the evil so so as to stop other people falling into what someone else is doing or the dangers of something. And let's have some examples of this in Hades. What did the scholars of the past do in this situation?
It's their word
mention about certain writers that he is that he he lies or he Yes. And this is very important. Okay, imagine, today we have we have had it that we know are authentic, or they're not authentic by the scholars. Now how do we know that a hadith is not authentic. We look at a chain of narration. And the chain of narration means I heard from so and so who heard from so and so who heard from someone so this is called a chain of narration, who heard from the Prophet sallallahu. Now if one of these so and so's one of these people in the chain, he's a liar, then this hadith is weak. We don't accept this hadith. Okay, unless it comes from another source.
In the same way, if a person one of them has a very bad weak memory, again, we don't accept his Hadith. So how do we know if the person's got he's a liar or he's has a weak memory. The scholars of the past they wrote books about this, looking at all the chains of narration and saying so and so has a weak memory because I know him. Another person, he's a liar, another person, he is not a person who has taqwa and so on and so forth. So in this scenario, it would be allowed after the break, we're going to go back into this point and look at how backbiting is allowed.
further examples of when backbiting is allowed what sort of Bahasa mubaraka Alana, Bina Mohammed and what Allah Allah He was Solomonic.
And people need each other's needs colors more than they need to drink.
And it's because even regarding what we drink and eat, we may not be able to figure out which is permissible, and which
is not preserved. In the books only. Let's say you're a prophet Muhammad, Allah was not preserved in the books, but on the heart, in the hearts of men, in the hearts of people who have devoted their time to seeking
belief and trust
that none could take place.
without the knowledge of Allah.
Welcome back. Before the break, we were talking about some of the times when it's permissible for a person to do backbiting. And the last thing we mentioned was that it's permissible to back bias, if it is to warn the Muslims from evil and advise them against it. And we mentioned the first example of this is that of weak narrators of Hadith so it's permissible by consensus of the Muslims or other obligatory to, to have a look at the change of narration and to mention when a person is weak, or when a piece of that person is strong. And this is what the scholars of Hadith in the past did. The second example of this changing, wanting the people about evil in a person is when a person inquires
about someone in certain situations, when other situations go Ross, I'm sure you're aware of one of these situations.
Let's say someone's get married, yes. Then he can inquire about that person. So what an okay, he can inquire, then. And then the person replying should give the honest answer, even if it means
on the face of him and backbiting. So what kind of things should he say? What kind of things can he say? Let's say for example, someone says to you, for example, just, you know, hypothetically speaking, they want to marry your sister to you. Or he wants to marry your sister, someone, what would you say to them?
Or would you ask about sangkat defects in the character? Okay, and what can they reply? They can reply with those defects such as, such as
they lie they hit.
Yeah, exactly. So that's one example of where we can inquire about someone. If someone inquires someone for marriage. It's permissible to speak about it. But the condition has to be that number one, obviously, is true. And number two, one has to be sincere in advising the prophets lie. Some said a dino naseeha. That this Deen this religion is must be how advice. What's another example of this? What about someone is studying under a person who indulges in innovation? Yes. And the person who's studying under him is unaware of this. Uh huh. That's right. So for example, if a person is going into his studying under someone who is known for innovation, then it's permissible to mention
that and to warn him against that. What about if somebody was to go into business with someone? Would it be permissible to backbite? In a certain scenario like that? No. What about if I want to know, I want to go into business with
a brother. And I came to your garage, and I said that, you know, what's this guy's character? Like? Is he truthful? Is he honest? Is he trustworthy? And let's say he turns out to be very bad. He's not trustworthy, he steals. Is that allowed to say something in that scenario? Yeah, would be allowed because person's asking for sincere advice. So you have to be sincere in your advice, even if it means paper in this particular situation. Yeah, with the condition of
sincerity and truth. Truth has to be truthful. That's right. Absolutely. The same goes with safekeeping something with someone, so I'm, you know, I've got a car, and maybe I'm going away on holiday. So I leave it with somebody to the crafter. Likewise, moving in with someone, okay, let's just have moving in with someone. So it's allowed for me to backbite and say, Hey, don't move in with that guy. Because he, you know, he does this and that and that he maybe has a bad temper. He throws mobile phones out the window or something ridiculous like that. Point is we're allowed to mention that
chef in these situations, is that it's a license to just say whatever you want about the person or you have to restrict yourself to a very, very good, good question. And in fact Amendment No, we're human. I mentioned this, after talking about were allowed to back but he actually mentioned this point, that he says we're only allowed to speak about the shortcomings. We can't speak about something else. So if someone says, Hey, can I What do you think I'm going to marry someone? So what do you think about her? And then maybe
this person knows this, this girl or knows the family? he's allowed to say only that which concerns the person's character? He can't say, Oh, you know, she's very ugly, for example. Okay. He can't say that. Because this is beauties in the eye of the beholder. that's to do with the husband, the one who's gonna marry but as for character issues, then yes, you can you can speak as long as it concerns the marriage.
It's also obligatory upon the one advising not to conceal this condition, but he has to instead mentioned the shortcomings that he has with the sole intention of advising him and one of the heads for this is Fatima case. Raja lavonne. How she said I went to the Messenger of Allah slice of lemon said to him, Abu jehanne, and more we have both proposed to me for marriage. So the Messenger of Allah Lyceum said Malawi is poor and has no money, no property. And Abu Jehan always keeps his stick on his back. In other words, he beats his wives a lot. So the province hasulam, himself advised against marrying both of them from the angle of the bad characteristics that they had that is to do
with March. Let's have a look at some comments from the people on the street. backbiting in general, it is not permissible. But I thought of a few like, ways or like reasons for it. If you're trying to warn somebody about a bad characteristic and personality of another person. So like, if you had a problem with a person, you don't want that to happen to a friend, tell that person The bad thing about the other. And, I don't mean generally you shouldn't, you shouldn't back by the person because like, if you're talking to
In a religious way, Islamic way, it's hot. Um, I don't think that backbiting is ever permissible in any situation because backbiting is just saying something bad about someone behind their back. And it's against all morals and ethics and Islamic code of ethics and everything. So why would you do it? And besides, it makes, it makes people feel really bad about each other and just make enemies instead of making friends. If, if I'm protecting him, then I guess it's not backbiting after all, but if I'm just backbiting for the sake of just backbiting, like it normally happens, then no, I will do it has some good comments there. And to move on to, or go back to what we were talking about
the places where we can warn the Muslims against some kind of evil that a person has imagined. No, we actually goes on to make mentioned the third example of this, which is what you said earlier on,
visiting or frequenting an innovator or a facet center. And he's taking knowledge from him. Now the condition here is that he must fear that this person may be affected by his innovational sin. And then he could mention that condition. But if it's not, they're not.
If a person is studying, for example, Arabic grammar with a person who has a minor innovation,
okay, and there's no fear, perhaps the person has enough knowledge to overcome this innovation. Okay, then in that scenario, there's no need to backbite that person that the teacher, but in the condition where the person is a new student of knowledge, and even though he's studying Arabic grammar, but the person has an innovation, that might be might affect this new student of knowledge. And it's permissible in that sense, in that case, to backbite this person, simply to mention his foot, by man, Mr. manoli, mentions a very important clause, he says, however, this is where people may or the person who speaks of the individual could be envious of the one who is advising against,
and shaitan may deceive him into thinking that he is advising sincerely. So it is important to be aware of this trap of shaitan. So very important, very important. Shaytan can come to a person say, hey, look, that guy, he's an innovator, you need to backbite it, but in reality, the person is actually envious of him. So one has to be very, very careful and pray to Allah make do it. I love that when he's speaking in this manner, that he's only doing it sincerely for the sake of a last note on. The fourth example of this warning Muslims from evil is that one who has a responsibility does not carry it out, okay, then it's allowed to backbite him Now this could be because he's not
fit for the job. Or maybe he's corrupt, or because he's neglecting his duties or something similar, it's obligatory to mention this to the one in authority that the boss says to remove him and replace him with one who is more befitting. So he should make him aware of this condition, so that he can be dealt with and urge him to improve or be replaced with someone else. So this is a clear example. An example of this is, for example, somebody
he has a job he's not doing his job properly, is allowed for a fellow employee or somebody else who's looking say, Look, your employee is not actually working.
As soon as you go out of the room, he stops working, he doesn't do his work, or he's neglecting his work, these kind of things. The fifth reason when it's allowed to backbite is if there's someone who openly commits disobedience or innovation, like openly drinking alcohol, for example, or taking the property of others unlawfully, or taking taxes, which are not legislated in Islam or other such matters is all from Mama nowhere, he says, then in that case, it is permissible to mention what he does publicly, it is not permissible, however, to mention other falls that he may have accepted, there is another lawful reason to do so as mentioned previously, so if somebody openly sinning is
openly listening to music, you're allowed to mention it, either in order to warn the Muslims against it, or something of that nature if he's openly sending
the sixth and final reason that amendment no we mentioned he said, to describe someone say if a man is known as the one who has weak eyes, or the lame one of the Deaf, one of the built or the blind one, or the cross eyed one and other such similar terms, then it's permissible to describe him only for identification purposes, the perfect season, a term that he does not like, if it's used, even if it's using a term that he doesn't like, okay? Because that is backbiting. So he's saying this and that but on the condition that is not done in a mocking way. So for example, let's just say that somebody who's blind and you're trying to describe him, you can you're trying to say, meet so and so
in the marketplace. So who is this guy he's This is that he's that you've tried your best to describe him, but he is known as the one who's blind. So then in that scenario is permissible for someone to say he's the blind one, because you've tried all other ways to describe
Okay to try and avoid any trying to avoid this common in a derogatory manner, yes, you must not describe him in drug treatment, you must not with that intention, but only if it is a characteristic that you can, you can, you know, tell that this person is so for example, if person has one hand, but he always hides his hand, okay in a sleeve and nobody would know that he has one hand and no, you can't use this description. Because the whole point of the description is something that's clear, that's apparent, okay about the person's body shape or whatever the short one, the tall one like this, but on the condition that you're doing it for describing the person and on the condition
that you've exhausted other means of describing him. Now, it is unlawful, however, to mention these things as deficiencies and if one can describe him in another way, as we said, that is actually better. inshallah, in the next episode, we'll look at a disease which is related to backbiting and that is the Mima or tail caring and we'll talk about that next episode of Santa Monica law he wabarakatuh