Purification Of The Heart

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AbdelRahman Murphy

Channel: AbdelRahman Murphy

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

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Today is September 28 2015.

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Can you hear

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me man?

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What

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can you say?

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The only soon as

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the young man of

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the

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lion

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the

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following

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show

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show

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say Gerardo

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de

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is so nice

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to

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be here.

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hella did not

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mean to

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sue me

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since October 9 edition inflation in English

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Have you seen this believes in our verses and says, I will certainly be given wealth and children? Has he looked into the unseen or has he taken from the Most Merciful province? No, we will record what he says and extend for him to handle length of chastisement. And we will inherit of him what he says, and you will come to us alone. And they have taken besides all the false deities, that they would be for them a source of honor, no, those Gods will reject their worship and will be coming bursaries against them. Do you not see what we have sent the devils upon the disbelievers inside of them in theory, so be not impatient over them. We only count out to them unlimited number. On the

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day we will gather the righteous to the Most Merciful as a delegation and will drive the criminals to hell in thirst. None will have power of intercession except he was made a covenant with the Most Merciful and they will say the Most Merciful has taken for himself the sun, you have done something monstrous, whereby the heavens are almost torn, and the earth splits open and announces fall down in ruins, that they ascribe the sun to the Most Merciful and it is not appropriate for the Most Merciful nations in the sun. There is no one in the heavens.

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In the earth, when it comes down to the Most Merciful as a surgeon, he has full cognizance of them, and is counted on exactly. And all of them are coming to him on the Day of Resurrection alone. Indeed, those who have believed in his unrighteous deeds, the Most Merciful will bestow on them well. So we have only made the waterbed easy in your town, that you may get good news there by to the righteous and mourn thereby hostile people. And how many generations? Have we destroyed before them? Do you see any of them or hear from them a sound

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tool.

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Right?

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Good revenue motion not because of

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money, but to know our brothers and sisters here I need a lot more

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peace.

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Recently, and we

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are voting.

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So hamdulillah. Last spring, I finally got the chance to go to the economic convention in Baltimore, leave a bunch of you actually got the chance to write that I've never heard that before. So I had the chance. But before I get the chance to go before I decided to go, I was like, You know what, I'm going to go public speakers that are going to be there. So once I get there, I know exactly what to listen to. Some of the

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speakers I stumble upon Ragnar Murphy, Murphy, that sounds

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so I searched on YouTube, watch this video, as we go through a few videos National Weather Service, you know, very, very well spoken to his body his training, he was cool. He was chill, especially, especially the media with him to sell essentially, they talk about the topic of

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love and romance and slam together with demonstrated the love you should have in your life. They showed the light, the show the relationship between our properties, we upon the price all the while running. So this one, I was like convinced this is the guy that I'm going to listen to. So this is the convention, and you get a chance to listen to him to get a chance to speak to him actually, rather session we're very low. And it you know, and a few months later, we decided what speakers to invite to the peace college essay. And I brought up

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the

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the board book, The ideal outcome here in Texas, is added to the map. So what I think is a shot. So he sent the invitation, we made some serious dramas, and 100 that he accepted.

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And he suggested the topic of the purification of the heart and the social media player. Now, when I heard that outlet combo, this was directed towards me, because this is this is what I need right now just the exact lecture that I'm waiting for. And what many of us have filled out because many of us here have Facebook and Facebook and Instagram and Twitter, some of your online dating account, right?

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so

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dangerous, dangerous suspects of social media. Nonsense. Social media is a nasty, I mean most of this year actually found out about this event because of Facebook because of this because of Twitter. So you're all you're gathered here today to benefit from Stan Murphy's visit. And I'm really excited to hear this lecture

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because

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he's a great speaker. He is a graduate of the University of Illinois at Chicago with the doctors and teachers of English and religious studies. He is currently pursuing his master's in mental health counseling. He has served as a direct director, Muslim chaplain and assistant Eman. He completed a master certificate program in Mecca. While growing up in the Chicagoland area is that two years of studying at a real yoga Institute after graduating with his BA set off to Dallas, where he began reading classical text of the Master junda in May 2014. He formally graduated from seminary one year program currently is continuing the study of the Quran and enamel the static text with Professor

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and is working to complete his coursework

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curriculum directly in the shape of the Gnostic jumper. Ladies and gentlemen, brothers and sisters without further ado, without further ado

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spillover from the lower side

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be a 70 day on the beach along with john and mean, there won't be any. There was no need to listen to what you're saying.

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But they got where we begin by praising Allah subhanaw taala everyone say from the law, it's one of the you know few blessings.

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Even being able to recognize that a person is blessed, right? There are so many times where people don't even understand or comprehend exactly how blessed we are. And the law that says, When Derek Do you have to the law you have to have that if you tried to count the blessings of a lot. And he uses a singular verb form here, right using the singular form here of blessing. Yeah, he says if you tried to count one you wouldn't be able to. and counting to one is like my baby, right? Like little children can count to one. But he's saying that if you try to fully comprehend me to one bus, he would not be able to fully grasp our importance that wasn't has in your life. So it always, always,

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always, beginning, middle and end, we begin and I sing

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and pray single Masada and then we ask that Allah subhanaw taala says Peace and blessings upon the problem amidst all of those

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who without, we would not have the catalyst to be the one who struggled for us who laid the foundation laid the path for us to follow this faith. And really, if anyone is having struggles or issues with their faith, they need to start by reading, we decided to grab a course which would be in constant nourishment, they need to get close to the life, the proper muscles and then by studying his life, and really when you when you find out what someone has done for you, you can't help it, appreciate them. You know, there are people who will consistently stay in relationships with others, because of what someone has done for them in the past, even if that current relationship might be

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toxic. So they'll say, Well, you know, I know that this person is not good for me now, but we have been gone through so much together, right? So I have to stay with them. Right? I have to be close to that. Imagine someone who's not only not toxic, but he's purely beneficial for you. Alright, so then and how we should still stay in a relationship with Christ so that by learning about things that he did for us, when we ask Allah subhanaw taala to send his peace of blessings upon him to extend that to us as we try to follow then the people who follow the path that promises up to the end of time everyone Good, okay.

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Monday night excited. Right. Great shot was the second week though working to school.

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Fourth, second, third, one of the brothers like I don't know.

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Where are we? This is a school. Okay, Van Wilder. Mashallah. Brother, Ben, welcome. So, very good to be here, my favorite audience and my favorite groups to speak to, or university audiences, the college age group, particularly because I just I really am fond of my time at the MSA. And if there's one thing that I can tell you, what advice I can give you,

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to start off your year, is that make sure you spend time with people who make you better. Make sure you spend time with those who share values with you. And that just their mere presence in your life brings you closer if you know something about the problem associated was the best to meet to have ever looked on the face of the earth. But he still had this top right. And he still had what was known to be the best generation. He could have done it by himself a lot stronger, probably could just let them do everything on his own right. But he needed people around him Allah set people around him to be the role players, right. And you guys know what I'm talking about Carmelo right

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now, right? Yes, for sure. Carmelo is actually the worst, but anyway. But you know, you're like Derrick Rose, for example, which I love a lot protect him and his knees.

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Right. And so the idea is that if you spend time with people around you who can bring you closer to a lot, not only will you come closer to a lover to come closer to each other, right? That's the kind of friendship that we hope that we can build with each other in sha Allah, and I'm so honored to be like the first speakers of the series in the session, how often you have these once a month, once every two months.

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Once a month. That's very, very frequent. And I hope inshallah we can use this opportunity tonight to better our relationship a lot because as we said, Men are short coffee they have to go for a short walk in the hands of someone

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you know, brightens their beginning, that is a sign that they will have brighten their enemy mean that if we do well on the Start shortly, you'll do well to finish inshallah tada and also with your classes, keep that in mind. So before we begin, because I don't want to, you know, take too long, I would like to read rather I'd rather have as open q&a as a longer session, but just some thoughts, just some things that I was thinking about when it comes to purification.

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Have a heart, especially in the social media area, how much how many of you are on the social media scene? Whether it's you know, Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, MySpace, they'll forgive you. Right?

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back either. I'm still on my

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way back, right? So social media, anyone have any social media accounts whatsoever at all? YouTube? Okay, so everyone's pretty much everyone in this room. And that's one of the signs that this is a ubiquitous topic when we have to talk about these things. It's sad. It's super relevant, you know, unless

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you're super into it, except the code he balances I never ever said we never sent the messenger, except for that messenger was versed in the language and descenders it does mean language, it also means culture of the people. And so it's not by you know, by connection there through like transitive property because the properties for teaching the Snap, snap man has the ability to engage every topic that we're going through a lesson number five never ever would put us through a situation that we can never look back to our fate and find out how to deal with it. Right when I was gonna describe the prophet SAW something he says,

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he said,

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he says from Alison Naka,

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he says that we did not send you except that you weren't mercy, you were wrong. And what's beautiful about this verse that uses the word Russia, which is a noun, not a verb, he could say you were merciful, right? At the time, he could say you will be merciful in the future. But he said, You are mercy. You are the concept of mercy in the Arabic language nouns are for all time. They're not restricted by past, present, or future. So when you look at the language problem, so some of you find mercy in your life, no matter what you're going through, no matter what area you're living in, you find an ability to relate back his teachings to what you're going through your life, inshallah.

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Tada. So, social media is one of those things where we just have to talk about it. And I kind of know, I laughed, and I cried to myself, right? When I see and interact with parents, who basically tried to, like, hide their kids from things, you know, up until a certain age, so it's normal. By the way, up until a certain age, you might hide your kitchen sort of realities. I know, some parents would fast forward to the Lion King department Mufasa dies, I still can't watch that for honestly. But they'll fast forward through that with their kids. Why? Because they don't want our kids experiencing like a traumatic death, the engagement free. You know what, at what time I went, when I

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went to go see it in the theaters when we were actually when we release. And actually a little girl started crying in the front row in that scene, because the parents didn't remember it didn't think, or who knows, right? That this is a very traumatic death scene. And then he to make it even worse, Simba, the Son of the Father goes and like bumps and dad's dead body was like that. That little girl just crying her eyes out, because she's like, what am I seeing right now like that, and she's like two or three or four years old. So it's normal to shield or hide some things to a certain age. But I always get a little bit concerned when I mean, like a 25 year old, you're like, what's the internet?

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Right? And I'm like, what the parents are like.

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And I'm like, you know what, you know, you don't know what the internet is not 25 we're very old. Because at some point, you're gonna interact with things. And Islam does teach us for certain things to stay far away from them, to hide yourself from them. It's not really the same Look, you're old enough? You know, the famous line. I know my limits. Yeah, you don't give them it's such a common play pushes them, right. I know my limits, right? Yeah. But it sounds as if you know, your own limits, you don't know what your nest can do to those limits will stay away, right. So for examples, you know, alcohol, these are things that you'd love to sit stay far away from these things don't

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come near them. But most of the things in society, most of the fits in that we deal with the testing temptations, we have to be able to engage it and use something called Tough luck to protect ourselves. Right? The strategy for cert for most temptations in life is not retreating. So when we engage in things like social media and the internet, these discussions, these topics of conversation are very important. Now, we talked about the heart in particular. And this is something that I'm very personally, you know, passionate about, because of my own personal life journey, and how I feel that as a community, we are doing something very dangerous. And that is that we are teaching people,

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especially younger people in Sunday school, how many of you on Sunday school or Saturday or the equivalent? How many what's a full time of cyber school? How many are expelled?

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Yeah, the few right in the crowd, right. Me too. shall walk in that grade. I came back and taught at that school. Right. So anyways, it was interesting seeing the principal expelled me I was like, Good morning, right. So But anyways, the point is that I feel like as educators and as mentors of young people and young Muslims, we are focusing wholeheartedly on the what, and the how of Islam without the why. So we're telling people you have to pray. This is how you pray. And then someone says why

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Because a lot sensor, and although that is the highest of answers, if someone has very young man, which I must have thought he compares the map to a tree. So I want you to naturally be young tree that was just planted, you know, sometimes with trees that are very young, you have to like put a stick in the ground next to it and tie it to the stick so that it can be maintained, right? So when Allah says that, you know, US will have that, and we'll talk about this some and he compared to the magic to the tree that's strong and has long branches, if someone is new in their faith, whether they are a new Muslim, or young Muslim or reengaged, Muslim after a time of not being engaged in the

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faith, that if we put too much weight on them and say, Oh, it's just an asset. So I mean, that's an answer that like, really, really high people on top what they're satisfied with, I'll do whatever I'm upset, so relieved to be laid off, I'm happy with my work. And we pray that we can get to that point that alleges said something we say Samantha what's on them, but to expect that of people is not the message of the premise or send them from the beginning. So we become obsessed with this method of education, where we tell him do this, or we tell her do this, this is how you do it. And we don't really explain why or what benefit it gives that person's life. And when they get to

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college, they wild out

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or when they get free, any sense of independence, they wild out and everyone in this room probably has some story, whether it's relative, whether it's personal, whether it's some friend, where a person was on the path, and then just took a strong left turn, right. And this is the cause of this is that we don't know why we're practicing what we're practicing. In short, my theory, my thesis, and this is a piece I believe, and we'll put it in the show notes is that the heart is at the crux of all matters. And if we focus on the reality of the heart, the human heart, not like the actual physical heart, but that too. But the spiritual part of me explain the difference to you what Oregon

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is in your skull.

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Your brain, right? But when something is really profound, you say what blown? Mind right? Can you talk to your brain? Basically, don't do it, please. Right? Can you? Yeah, physically? Is there a tangible to real substance? Can you touch your mind? No. So this is your screen. This is the difference between the physical heart and the spiritual heart. Yes, there's a physical heart. Yes, there is a physical brain. But there isn't a metaphysical reality just that we have a mind. Right, you also have a spiritual heart called have been less profound refers to and this part is super, super important. In fact, it takes your success in the in the hereafter. it dictates my success in

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the Hereafter, almost profile says Yo man is power man. And what happened in that on that day, no money or children will benefit, right in that that's a long becoming setting except to the person who comes along with a heart that is pure that is studying. So on that day, no cash and no connections will help you. Right? And how many of us the first thing we think of when we're in trouble is money.

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Like the fine, can I try to pay fine, get out of this. You're in alignment airport, you know, I was coming back from Turkey can be taken as a turkey and open up things like that. And when you're on like a long line, and you don't know if you're gonna make your flight, you start to look around and you're like, Is there any sort of like, upgrade that I can pay for? Is there anything I can just cap like, put cash down that way, don't miss this flight. So money is seen as like a problem solver for us. You know, I remember my wife and I were stopping to get burgers on the drive home long drive 16 hours, right? Never get burgers on a 16 hour drive, by the way. But anyway, so we're stopping. And

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we stopped at this parking lot Google took me to in Memphis, Tennessee, where my wife was from and we're driving to Dallas, we're still eight hours left. And I pull into this parking lot. And we go and we get these burgers. Okay. And from the ladder cut out. Everyone's like,

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okay, so chill. Okay, so we have these burgers. And I'm going back to my car. And I see this dude, like, you know, the tire of my car.

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And those of you from Europe, you know exactly what's going on, right? He's putting a shoe on it or a boot, right? So I walk up to him and he looks at me, dude looks at me and goes back to doing his work. But he sees me there's no other cars in the parking lot. He sees me walking. He's like,

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no, like no decency. Man, brother, I'm from Chicago. So that's probably why. So he's doing this and I get up to him. And he's literally like, just finishing it. I get from the car. I'd really like you saw me You have to finish I was inside of the burger place like three minutes, dude. And he's like, Yeah, man. Sorry. And I was like, Okay, so what happened was Google took me in that parking lot. And it was a paid lot. Google just said, You're here. And I was like, I'm here. I'm good. I'm not right. Don't listen to Google, by the way all the time. It could be someone else was telling you to do something horrible things could be shut down anyway. So the guy is like, I'm like, What do you know,

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what do we have to do to get to get this taken care of, you know, what do I have to do what I have to take? And he's like, $125 cash, right? 100 photos, cash. So money has become a problem solver here now. So I think to myself, what's more important my car

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For $125, obviously the car, right. So at that moment, I'm thinking money is going to solve this problem. But unfortunately to finish the story, I didn't have cash on me the nearest ATM was two miles away. And he's like, I'm about to go home. And I was like, Okay, can you drive me to the ATM? He's like, no. I was like, can you unmute my car and quality? The ATM goes? No. I was like, so how do you expect me to get the cash? I don't know.

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You're not really helping you. So my wife, she's a genius. She's like, Oh, I have a gift card in my car. And other comments is, of course, the $200. And I was like, there's gonna be there's gonna be some most expensive burgers I've ever bought in my life right now. So then we had to end up giving the guy a gift card and come to LA, he took it off. He was smiling the whole time want to smack that smile on his face. But I did it because of stuff up. And yeah, so that's that, basically. And we left, we enjoyed those burgers, and I ate it like three hours because it was so expensive. But the point is that at that tough moment, when times got tough, and I had nowhere else to go, all of a

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sudden now money became the solution, a lesson on the data from money will not be the solution. Have you ever been tied in a really bad situation, and there wasn't even a way to pay yourself out of it?

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Like, you're like I'm begging you give me some option, some find some penalty. I need to get to here. I need to do this. By this time, please. Personally, I'm sorry, I can't help most of your million men on that day money will not help you. panel was scary already. Because then we're like, well, what are we going to do? Whatever he says, and not children, some of you are like children, people are going to give their children away or maybe. But also family helps you do things? Yes, do they not? I mean, for example, my mother, we never hired a movie company in our lives, we moved like six times, my mom just gave birth to two of us, right? Two sons. So she gave birth to her own movie

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company, right? She raised them and we did everything. So we and we ended up saving moving costs a lot. We ended up saving our family a lot of money by my brother and I just moving things around. But on that date, not even your children will help you with will help the person on that day it will land man except for whosoever that's a lot of decompensating. Whoever comes out of your heart, the only currency that will be acceptable in a judgement is a pure heart, peaceful heart. So when we talk about Islam and practicing Islam, and we talk about praying and doing the right things, and staying away from caught on doing about and doing things that are good for you, we have to keep this

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in mind. But it all leads back to one place. And the premise also that he said enough is just that he woke up. He said very early in the body, there's an Oregon, there's like a piece, either on a hot summer, just that if that piece is cut, right? Then that person will be upright in totality, meaning that if that thing is good, they won't have to worry about anything else, right? what you got. So that's just an adjustment for you that if this thing is bad or corrupt, then it doesn't matter what that person does, or how hard they tried, everything will be corrupt. I know. You barely use the heart. So when we combine these two conversations now of the purification of the heart, and our

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reality, we have to see that our reality affects our heart. One of the biggest lies that we've been sold as a society is that you can do things and have it not affect your heart.

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Everything that we do, we say we listened to the watch. We engaged some scholars, we've been classically say things to eat. Right? Everything has some sort of residue that leaves on your heart good or bad.

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So when you're watching your there's a reason why certain parents and certain families or people are so concerned about watching movies with around scenes in them. There's a reason why there's a reason why the popcorn and soda was so you know, heavily warn people from listening to false speech and to enter talking and saying terrible things. Because you might say something and think it's just that one time, but it actually does stay with you, it sticks with you. One of my teachers in Chicago said that this dunya is like dope. When you mess around with it. When you get too involved in dope. Even when you remove your hand from the dough, you still have little bits of dough in your hand, right?

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or oil or some sort of residue on your hand. So he said, Don't think that you can just engage yourself fully in all these temptations and trials and habits and not have residue. But at the same time. If you engage yourself with good habits and good practices, you'll also have that good recipe right? You'll also have that good residue on your on your heart. Yes, it was fantastic to give us good hearts. I mean, so now why the heart with this topic, in particular social media, in my opinion, some of you might share this with me is like the most apparent form of communication meaning that it's so focused on image and it's so focused on physical realities. The Prophet

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chromosome seven he tells us that hedgy three says in the law, hilarious little Elijah and certainly from what I saw what he thought what will never ever he doesn't look at your body.

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body or your image, you know, somebody is concerned about what's happening on the wheel that will become actually the property when he's actually worried about what he actually will look at is your art.

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But we social media encourages us to be more concerned about what is outward, what is manifest, what is apparent that it does about what is inherent. And this is one of the scariest realities of the heart is that someone could dress like this. Right? And you see me and you're like,

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right, there wasn't much on

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it, I'm sorry. So

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you see someone who looks like there's like a brother or a sister, Mashallah, whose job matches her, you know, like, go buy her shoes and her purse and her glasses and everything, right? And you're like, Mashallah, she looks like a Muslim, right? Or you must say it was fun. But does that even mean? Like, we throw these phrases around that are so hurtful, and they completely ignore the inner reality. And it doesn't mean that the outer reality doesn't exist in the fullness of what's inside will be outside. The limits of whatever's inside will be outside right over time, which what he meant not up. But whatever is inside of you will happen outside. I'll tell you a story. I have a

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friend who uses really bad language I haven't. He's a good friend of mine. I love them a lot, a lot. But he's really bad language, especially when I'm playing FIFA against them. And you can you can guess why, right? So he drops like a s word. Sometimes the F word and I'm just like, Dude, chill out. It's just a game like I'll be I'll be some American team. You can beat Chelsea, whoever, right? So we're playing and he doesn't. And I told him one day, I was like, Look, man, like, your son gets older because he has a son. I think when your son gets older, you got to stop using this language. Right? You have to even now just stop from now because you're gonna you're gonna drop it at home one

00:31:46--> 00:31:58

day and your son is just going to be walking. That's the first thing is Baba Mama. No, it's gonna be f right. Like, that's the first order to learn and you're gonna get some e Party and the wreck somebody's gonna be like, right.

00:31:59--> 00:32:34

And it's really bad. You know, it's pretty bad. You know, you don't want your son's first we're gonna get a profane expletive, please. He's like, It's okay. It's okay. I know my limits, right? The famous, famous last words, right? So, you know, lo behold, we're playing one day and his son now Mashallah is very smart, very smart, kid, young kid, but very smart. He repeats things, he knows things very well. And we're playing and someone scores a goal and my friend and he just goes, Shane drop password, right? And son, just like, eyes light up. And he's like,

00:32:36--> 00:32:38

just go, like,

00:32:39--> 00:32:42

everybody. And everyone's just like,

00:32:44--> 00:32:52

I can hear my heartbeat, right? Because I was so embarrassed. So my friend immediately, like he wasn't a dad. No, no, no.

00:32:54--> 00:33:03

You can't say that. And if somebody says, Listen, how smart kids are evil geniuses, right? Your son goes, but

00:33:05--> 00:33:24

ever since I read please, like you said about you know? And then his dad goes, No, no, no, no, listen, he goes, son, some things Baba says, I made a mistake. But you can't say what promises when you made some mistake. He goes no wrong. Right? You get turned into like Angry kid. Anything you see, I can say to.

00:33:27--> 00:33:31

That is right, genius kid. Mashallah just like mental jujitsu just destroys this guy.

00:33:32--> 00:34:07

And just like what, and one of our teachers, he actually said that the best teachers for children are their eyes, and their ears, not what not their brain. They don't think about everything, they just do what they see and hear. And to some degree, adults are like this, too. We're all like this to some degree. So whatever's inside the heart will become apparent will become manifest over time. Even if someone thinks that they've got it fully covered. They've got it fully protected, I'm good, I'm good for it. Don't worry about it. Right, I can take care of it. It's gonna show up. So when we talk about the heart, the scary thing is that the internal can be like opposite what the external

00:34:07--> 00:34:38

is. So if someone's trying to really put on a show, as far as how they look and how they're perceived, and how they act and how people think of them, the inside can be different. The example I give is like a nice shiny red apple with a rotten core. You know, when I was studying nothing, when I was a kid, they used to bring us the fresh fruit and they import their fruit a lot of a lot of times from a lot of places. And one day one of our teachers he brought us oranges, and it was like oranges or some oranges are beautiful, a lot like watermelons because it's a fruit and it's also a drink at the same time. And when you're a student and you're broke, like you need to kind of

00:34:38--> 00:34:53

consolidate right and make smart decisions. So he brought us oranges, and we were so excited that we you know, we're like bright orange oranges. The skin was like coming off really easily. It was like easy to peel. And I crack open the orange box section halfway. There was a nice long warm right in the middle of it.

00:34:55--> 00:34:56

And I still ate it and I'm just kidding.

00:34:57--> 00:34:59

But when someone's external is

00:35:00--> 00:35:37

Beautiful, but their internal is rotten. That's what it feels like. Like that's, that's it. That's the feeling we should get when we see ourselves outwardly. And people are praising us and thinking that we're so good, and we're so nice. And then we're by ourselves. And we just were so different. That reaction of disgust that everyone just had a view, that's how we should feel about ourselves. Like what's wrong with me, I'm putting on this show. Some people think that I'm such and such, but I'm really not, you know, and that's what is found, one of the one of the things that Sam tells us to focus on is Look, your external will take care of itself be concerned, but don't neglect your

00:35:37--> 00:35:44

internal at the cost of just protecting your extra. So these are some important things to think about a little bit harder. Now.

00:35:48--> 00:36:12

There are a couple ways that ilustraciones Allah describes this. When he describes him when I 15, he says your food will not be acquired in America, people will be that these people they say with their tongues that they don't do, right, that or that will just not in their heart. Sorry. These are the people he's describing what apathy, he says, They talk a big game, basically. And they don't actually have that in their heart. He also says, Yeah, you I

00:36:13--> 00:36:13

mean, that's it.

00:36:15--> 00:36:48

Why don't you say things that you don't do? So Allah is constantly calling up that double life that people live. He's constantly saying, look, you got to check yourself, you got to check your inner reality. So now how the social media come in this whole discussion now that we've talked about the importance of being congruent internally and externally, and not letting your internal suffocate spiritually at the cost of putting a image in front of people? How does social media come in? Well, like we said, at the beginning, it's unavoidable, it's ubiquitous, it's gonna touch somebody in some way, shape or form of their life, even if you're not on it. You're one of those people who's like,

00:36:48--> 00:37:21

I'm not on social media, you're like a hipster comic, even one of those people, which I love a lot, but that to you, unless you someone you know, or some sort of realm. I know, brothers who don't have their sisters don't have it, and their spouse does or their siblings do, or their kids do. And they have to tell them, like, please don't put pictures of me up things like that. Everyone's gonna have to interact with social media. So we have to have this discussion. Now. What's the second thing and how does social media come in is that there are diseases of the heart. So we talked about the heart in the heart can live one of two things. Unless one person's foot pressure off, he says that in the

00:37:21--> 00:37:59

heart can be a man. Or it can be covered. Very simple, like a heart can only house one of two things. It's like two people that can't be in the same room, you guys have friends like that, you gotta invite only one of them at a time, right? So and that'll last for a while later. So remember, roster spots left may not wanna make things good between them. So if you can make things good between those two friends do it. But the point is that the HUD cannot house event and Cooper in the same house, right, because they're just so opposed to each other. They just don't make any sense spiritual dissonance. So the heart is the home pretty mad. But unfortunately, the heart can start to

00:37:59--> 00:38:37

be affected by these diseases known as diseases of heart. And unfortunately, social media, this era that we live in, it gives itself or motivates certain diseases that would otherwise be weak or even dormant. It motivates them to come out. And these are diseases By the way, that scholars talked about, like 1200 years ago, but when you look at the symptoms, you're like, wow, they failed. It's like the announcer knew he had Instagram, you know, I'm saying like, they nailed the symptoms down perfectly. So I'm going to go through some of the diseases, inshallah, some of their symptoms, how to handle them inshallah, and then we'll open it up for q&a.

00:38:38--> 00:39:10

The first is the disease of origin. Which means vanity urgent, actually, is kind of a funny word. So the word hygiene and everything which is when you're kind of like stunned at something, you know, you check it out, it's strange. So our job literally means that a person is like stunned that their own selves, like hey, go ahead and you're going you look really good today, right? Like we talked to in there nobody right myself. So Ben, and he was like when the person is like obsessed with themselves to the point where they like catch themselves off guard. Anyone ever been to the gym

00:39:12--> 00:39:14

and seeing the area in front of the mirror,

00:39:15--> 00:39:18

you know, what the mirror is actually meant for in the gym. Anyone

00:39:20--> 00:39:24

is meant to perform, right? Because lifting right until it was about lifting, okay.

00:39:26--> 00:39:59

Lifting right lifting weights, is about having correct form. If someone does it incorrectly, it's kind of like running in quicksand is pointless. So having correct form is very important. So when they design gyms back in the day, even you'll see this an old gym, they put mirrors on the wall because you need to make sure that your elbow is tucked in, etc. You're holding the bar in the right place, especially when you get tired you keep an eye and make sure you're not performing and just falling apart. These are actually very important functions of a mirror. What is the function of the mirror in the gym today? selfies Right, exactly. The first one he saw

00:40:00--> 00:40:35

Right. So it's not about the farmer, it's not about being concerned about doing it, right. It's about the after effects like, Oh my God, my arms are huge right now, people have to see this, right? The world needs to know what's going on right now. Take a picture of the arm put up online, right? Or the ABS or whatever may well protect you right at me from seeing your arms and abs. Okay? So then he has become like a huge staple of today's society through social media, through things like the gym, things like getting ready to, you know, like, getting ready to go out. I feel so strange. When I see the selfie stick, I feel broken inside a piece of me died, right? someone walking around me, I

00:40:35--> 00:40:57

love forgiving. But if any of us have, have bought or used one, right, in a way that's inappropriate when you're especially when you're by yourself, there are some pieces to it. But generally speaking, when I see people walking around taking pictures of themselves, and put and making a face, like my wife and I were in London, once we saw this, and I just looked and I just, I felt so sad, that person. So I went up to them. I said, Can I take a picture of you for you?

00:40:58--> 00:41:32

It won't be a selfie, but I promise it will look good, right? And I was like, Yeah, sure. Like, I was so weirded out by my matching. But I was like, please don't embarrass yourself like this. Let me take a picture for you. We can even pretend to we're friends for three seconds, right? He said, Sure. I think a picture Why? Because this constant obsession of the self, this vanity, being concerned about how one looks, you know, there are times in our life when we're younger. And we're very concerned with you think when we walk by any reflective surface and instantly because the competition gets quiet. Everyone's just looking at the audience. Right? It'll be way it's natural,

00:41:32--> 00:42:09

but in a way, it's very dangerous. Because what do people do to look good? And who defines what it means to look good? Right? You know, we have this sort of weird social definition going on of what it means to be beautiful. And we're kind of part and parcel perpetuating that definition. It's very dangerous, by trying to fit into certain images and archetypes, with what fashion is telling us to do. And these things are pushing with this, you know, and Islam has always been a cultural shift thing, you know, revolutionary ideology. It's never been one that's been playing with the danger at the time.

00:42:10--> 00:42:15

I showed a video to some of my students when I was teaching the snaps with some fourth graders.

00:42:16--> 00:42:49

And I was we're talking about the Constitution. Which I shouldn't have even been there because believe it or not, I don't work job, right. At least that's a mark where the messenger, right? I'm not sure, exactly right. But I was talking about the job. And I tried to find a woman to do it. Because who am I to speak about the modern construction of women wearing pajama, not anyone that can speak about that. But since there was no one who could speak about it, in the time that I was given, I went and spoke about it on behalf. And so what I did was I showed some different like, videos, images of what the job was like, across the world is like that. And there were some that were a

00:42:49--> 00:43:24

little bit more hit, let's say, right? And I didn't make any comments about any of them. I'm like, everyone's at their own place. Everyone's got their own spiritual journey. No one can judge someone else, even if they're not wearing it. And they are, who might have seen it, this person is closer apart from Allah, only Allah knows that, right? So what was interesting was that the fourth grade kids made interesting comment, when they saw the ones that were like, a lot more different than what American fashion would tell. Someone's dressed like, when they saw the ones that fit in or with American fashion, I'm sorry, they were a little bit less impressed than the ones that were like

00:43:24--> 00:44:03

very, just out of the box. Like, for example, the Malaysian hijab, or like the one from I pulled up one from I think, like South Africa, and it just looked different. And there was one that was more like, urban, and they were like, okay, and I asked them actually noticed, and I said, Why you guys reacted so differently to the different styles. And they said something profound. They said, After hearing about mathematics is a primarily urban elementary school, is it after hearing about mathematics our entire lives, we always felt that Muslims were like, better than the rest of society, but that they shouldn't have to, like, look like us. But we strive to be like that. These

00:44:03--> 00:44:06

are not Muslim kids saying I was shocked. I was blown away. I was like,

00:44:07--> 00:44:38

and they were like, yeah, so when we see like, Muslim guys, they're like, trying to fit into the dominant culture, what it means to be a man without preserving their modesty. They're like, that's not cool to us. As a non Muslim, right? We have higher standards for Muslims in our minds, I was blown away by that. So the idea of vanity pushing us to want to be accepted or fit in or love or like, the very dangerous diseases of the heart that can happen. You know, it's so weird when I get text messages from people saying, hey, share my status.

00:44:41--> 00:44:45

Like wipes. I'm like, how are you? You know?

00:44:46--> 00:44:59

And if I don't that person like unfollowed me as if I care, right? But they're like, Hey, you didn't share my status. I want you that's not cool. Why? Because attaining people looking at getting perception has become the ultimate goal for us. We want people to see us

00:45:02--> 00:45:40

We have to be very careful. So how does one battle or joke now? How does one battle? Well, when you feel as with many diseases of the heart, when you feel the inclination to do something that lends itself to that disease, you have to just fight it right out, you have to just pushing into the community. So as you're typing something, or taking a photo, or doing something, that your inner goal, and this is the scary part of the hardest thing, only, you know, like, I don't know what's going on in you, you don't know what's going on beside me. Only I know what's going on. So when I feel that push to be noticed and appreciated for my own sake, and not for the sake of a lot, I have

00:45:40--> 00:46:15

to stop myself. So you might think of like a hilarious joke you want to put online. So you might get on Reddit one day, inshallah or something, give it to a friend, right? You want to take a picture of yourself. Instead, take a picture of your friend, or just don't get a picture, just enjoy the moment, right? You don't think you should have everything you want to do something where your goal is to ultimately be noticed by people. And to show off in that way, just don't do it. Just stifle it, just push it down. The second disease that comes with this is known as react ostentatious. And this is a disease that is specific for people are trying to use religion as a means to show all

00:46:15--> 00:46:20

right, which has become this really common phenomenon, we can actually just say it very bluntly,

00:46:21--> 00:46:26

it's become very common for people who were saved for ad to like, put out massive amounts of videos.

00:46:27--> 00:46:30

And the funny thing is, I don't need to see a video of your face.

00:46:31--> 00:46:58

I see here before and has been recited. But some of the reciters Mashallah they set up an entire studio, and they got like very nice clothes on. And they made you know, they used to make fun of Egyptians that haven't happened gyptian they used to make fun of Egyptian because when they recite we get really into it, and they say that they're like performing, right? But they're like, actually, they're performers. And there'll be like resigning and they end but I like seeking them out. And everyone. And one of the phrases that I say is just a beta male will destroy your house.

00:46:59--> 00:47:35

That was a word like praising somebody, why do you want let's try that person's house man, we're gonna go home to after them performing right? Now, don't get me wrong, I love listening to reciters I shook up the Boston criminal laws are my favorites. But there is a fine line in religion, and performing religion publicly. And performing religion publicly that makes sense. Doing Islam publicly and performing it for people, there's a fine line between the two that we have to be careful with. And this is not just for people of status, or people of community status, etc. But this is for every single person who knows his famous story that you tell, no one knows if it's true

00:47:35--> 00:48:08

or not, I've never been able to find, let's leave it like went back to but it's a funny story. But basically, there was a young man who was praying. And then there was there was trying to impress the father of the woman who was trying to marry and so he's praying the message very long prayer. And he's the father came in behind him and the father and his friend, he was praising these young men. Men are a disgrace, oh my god, how long he's praying how frequently these messages. And young young man is hearing this and just soaking into the app, for sure. Amazing. So you get to stay longer and longer for prayer. And after a few minutes, they come back, they said, Look at how long he's

00:48:08--> 00:48:24

praying, but by God's power walk, and then you can embrace it more and keep standing keep standing. When they start praising his character, they start praising everything about him and his religion. And then they stop praising him. He turns and he's like, man, I need to give him something else to praise me for. So during the prayer, he turns nice, I'm fasting.

00:48:25--> 00:48:38

So this story is a good example. And everyone tells the story of Larry. But the idea is the sheer ridiculousness of someone doing that. Now check this out. It's ridiculous for someone to do that activity, right?

00:48:39--> 00:48:39

Yes or no?

00:48:40--> 00:48:52

We say yes. Okay. There was like, an argument. It's like no, right? You're ridiculous. It's ridiculous for someone to do that actively to actually do that. Yes, yes. But how many of us actually felt that in our heart?

00:48:54--> 00:49:34

How many of us have felt when someone's praising us for something, and we start reminding ourselves how good we are? Right? It's incredible, remember, was it surprised a lot, he said something really profound. I was reading with some of the students have gone to seminary on Sunday, the book of or the section of Google, who was talking about the rights of brotherhood, and one of the rights is to be quiet about people's deficiencies, and to be to be proclaimed their, their, their good characteristics. But he even warns and says, don't praise people too much. Because you can start to get them to start to praise themselves internally, right? Don't tear people down, but don't praise

00:49:34--> 00:49:36

them too much. Okay, that you pitch on

00:49:38--> 00:49:59

them this way, you are balanced. So we add ostentation is very, very dangerous. And it destroys a person's deeds on the day of judgment when someone did something for the sake of someone else. If I gave a job football, if I came to Queens to give a lecture to impress everybody, and I'm going to be so concerned about the feedback afterwards. Because you like it. You

00:50:00--> 00:50:35

You like it, you like it? Then on the Day of Judgment, Allah is going to tell me May Allah protect me from this, but he could tell me go and get your award of the app set up and most people that you spoke to, because clearly you did it for them. You didn't do it for me. So yes, it's very dangerous, because on that day, when we're expecting entrance into paradise, because we didn't have proper saline. Now all of a sudden, we're gonna have to go into secret word for people who can't give us reward. There's a hadith that talks about a man or a woman, potentially anybody on the Day of Judgment, and he's brought this mountain in front of massive mountain. And he goes, he's told by the

00:50:35--> 00:50:59

angels, these are your good deeds. Please inform These are your good deeds. So the person becomes so overwhelmingly happy, I made it, he's going to do everything I can in my life. It's here in front of me, a Sue happy, but he thinks for sure I'm good. How could someone have this many deeds and not be good not be guaranteed paradise. And then at a moment's notice, a wind comes and blows all of the good deeds like dust, and they're gone.

00:51:01--> 00:51:16

And he asks frantically, because he's worried now, that was his ticket. That was what he thought was gonna be in. He asks frantically What happened to my deeds? And he's told it's announced to him. This is because in public, you did one thing but it probably because

00:51:18--> 00:51:21

you said something in public, but in private, you didn't do that thing.

00:51:22--> 00:51:34

in public, you warn people against something, but in private, you actually did that thing yourself. Right? So the idea of showing one in public, but being different privates is an extremely dangerous disease. May Allah protect us from that? I mean,

00:51:36--> 00:52:16

the next disease besides madami ostentation is arrogance, and arrogance, by the way, no one should feel in this room that because they have a certain level of practice in Islam, that they feel safe from these things. In fact, I would argue that some of these diseases are more people who are more susceptible to these are people who are more engaged in their religion, like arrogance being one of them. I think that arrogance, particularly is a religion of those who are who are a little bit more extreme. Either people who are extreme in their hatred of faith, or those who are a little bit more advanced in their faith. And they look towards others and they say, look at this person, how bad

00:52:16--> 00:52:31

they are, I'm better than this person. Even if they don't say it, they might feel it. You know, one time there was a man who was trying to mess with him a lot. And he said to you know, you said, who's better? Your beard or my dog?

00:52:33--> 00:52:35

Trying to troll the trolls. All right.

00:52:38--> 00:52:38

Okay, so.

00:52:41--> 00:52:44

So he started trolling. He's like, right?

00:52:45--> 00:53:05

Right. He's like, he's like the shape of the time everyone after but he was better. Your beer, which is clearly a symbol of some non devotion to the example of promises. Or my dog. Right? You know? Have you ever troll the troll? That the best feeling ever? Right? So this guy's trolling counter trolls?

00:53:08--> 00:53:26

He said, it depends. Cuz he's instantly waiting for the guy the trolls instantly waiting for you not meant to be like, a fool. Clearly my beard for the summer. Your dog, most of us say that he meant his saliva nudges. You're an idiot go away, right? You can't sit with us, okay?

00:53:29--> 00:53:33

Which sticks with us, right? Remember, he wants to hear the J days. But now you can forget it. Okay, so

00:53:34--> 00:53:36

he says actually depends.

00:53:37--> 00:53:43

So we need to pay if he goes, if I make it to paradise, then my beard is better.

00:53:44--> 00:53:49

Right? But if I make I enter Hellfire, then your job is better.

00:53:51--> 00:53:56

Right? So he was somebody that he didn't have that position of arrogance where he's like, I email

00:53:58--> 00:54:02

right? You don't want him with books will be written about me.

00:54:03--> 00:54:38

From our library, famous Egyptian scholar contemporary, you got the window, like a very famous professor, you know, he was known for actually, a lot of people compare us as nomads in him. I know you guys have a lot of love from seven nomads. A lot of people compare us that and I met Tim because he was famous for making complicated topics easy for people to understand, which is what I think it was step number one is special talents that he can do that. Right. I was given him that that gave me a lot protection. I mean, so sharabi who was known as like the farmer shapes, right? So he was known as like a farmer ship so like, you know, like when you're driving through New York, you see people

00:54:38--> 00:54:59

just kind of sitting on the corner chillin Dahomey is like, eating a sandwich or like a bagel or whatever, just chilling you know, like a common New Yorker, I want you to get like the most common New York person right? That was who shot only made sense to, but he was a genius. Like he was a professor. He was somebody that everyone to your question. Even the most high scholars was just on it.

00:55:00--> 00:55:04

So there's a story of Szechuan Oh, he that his son told like an after he died.

00:55:05--> 00:55:42

And his son said that one day we were getting ready for his weekly lecture, shall we give a weekly lecture? And we were getting ready for it. We prepared the messages. And there was like an apartment above the masjid where chef would get ready. Now you're ready to shower. You have his clothes, Irish clothes. Get ready. All we think, you know, kind of like Dover's notice last minute. And he said that I went up to the flat the apartment, and I found that my father just shot Oh, he was not there. This is his son narrating the story. So I said, Where is he? You know, Where's he going? And since my friends if he started looking for him, like frantically, he said, finally, I went out of all

00:55:42--> 00:55:58

places. I was the most unlikely cafeteria. I went to the courtyard everywhere. I couldn't find my father. So he was finally nice. I was desperate. I just decided to go look in the bathroom. Maybe he's in the bathroom. Who knows? Even though the apartment has its own bathroom? I went to the bathroom usually oversee question bathrooms.

00:55:59--> 00:56:32

Yeah, you know, right. Okay. So everyone, imagine that in your mind, right? Okay. So imagine like a flip upside down for pot. Okay. So he walks into the machine. And check this out. Okay, he opens one of the stalls is not completely closed. And he sees his father, the sheriff on his hands and knees, in his in his in his nice outfit, with the equivalent of a toothbrush, scrubbing the hole in the ground. And you all know that holes use for scrubbing it with soap and water.

00:56:34--> 00:56:54

He freaks out his son's like, my dad's not crazy. This is it. Like he was one of the greatest scholars of Egypt. Right? All we were thinking right now has it? Right? No, right? He's thinking. And now nobody's doing like he thinks he's a janitor. But he didn't do like, Oh my gosh, all these things that we have going on these projects are done. So yes, that if

00:56:55--> 00:56:59

you're not sure what's going on, he said, Give me one minute.

00:57:01--> 00:57:21

finish cleaning the toilet, he got it. He said, Son, I was sitting in the apartment above the machine. And there was a window that overlooks the street. And I was getting my clothes ready. And I was ready to read my notes. And I saw people walking, you know, and do people used to walk like 1000s of feet. When companies take their app, I saw people walking.

00:57:22--> 00:57:50

And internally, I felt my heart that look at how many people are coming to learn or you look at how many people are walking to learn from you. Because I felt so proud of myself. I thought there was so much better than them, I their teacher, they're going to learn for me look at where I'm sitting. And he said, I got the toothbrush, and I got the soap and water. And I said to myself, you need to go remind yourself who you really are. You're a servant.

00:57:52--> 00:58:33

This is how we address these problems head on. We don't just let them fester and grow with infections. We have to recognize them and fight them. So arrogance is that feeling of when someone feels like they're better than somebody else, for whatever reason. And this is the sooner of Shankara shutdowns, famous line, the famous line that he said to a lot stronger father when he was asked, why did you do what I commanded, etc? He said what I do better than him. And I mean, there's so many other answers that he could have said, there's so many other things that he could have talked about. I'm not an angel, y'all but you said to the angels only about I'm not an angel. I'm a

00:58:33--> 00:59:16

gym, he could go on different paths. They all would have been incorrect logically, because I love this command and logical think, but he could have at least tried. But he went straight to the answer and said, I've been at it. And that arrogance, made shakes off forget. And we got the opportunity, every other thing and pretty evident shake on from any look at the mercy of a hospital who is staged that mercy somehow no one can you know, even people who deny Allah's existence, Allah still lets them breathe, and eat and live and love. But shake time put himself outside that mercy of watching the most occurs once upon a while. There's actually a duration musasa found in England, where he

00:59:16--> 00:59:47

says that he went to a thought, and he basically sold shirts on Look, why don't you just make sense to tell right now? You know, why don't you ask him for forgiveness right now. You know, it's been a while he made a mistake, but make Toba may ask for forgiveness. And she thought it was like on the fence about it. And he told me he said you just need to make sense. But you didn't do such back then just make sense. But now it's your fault that I can't write. arrogance prohibits someone from doing good. They can't do it. So if the disease grows, that eventually they'll separate themselves. They'll think I'm so good. Then they'll think I don't even need to do this because I'm so good. I'm

00:59:47--> 00:59:53

so sad. I'm solid. I'm great. Right? Let's move on to protecting us from areas that mean?

00:59:54--> 00:59:59

So how do we fight arrogance, number one, because it actually talks about this. He says that when you look around at

01:00:00--> 01:00:33

And you see their deficiencies. You see their mistakes and their shortcomings, which we all do. You know, it doesn't. It's not only for the people who think that they're better, but it's for people who think that they're more advanced or forward than others. How many times do we do this with like other countries or elders? Or immigrants, right is a very common narrative now amongst like, anti immigrant narrative. Oh, we're better than them. Why don't even know what they're doing? Or the elders? Why? Because we're smarter than them. I went to university Bendigo University, but upon a lot, you know, this is like the Homer Simpson mentality. You know, where the Simpsons trained an

01:00:33--> 01:00:44

entire generation to think that elders are stupid. Right? Answer No. Family Guy, yes or no? is Peter Griffin a smart guy? would you ask him for like math homework? Oh, no.

01:00:45--> 01:01:02

The common pop culture media narrative in our generation, my generation. I'm 27 now taught us that smart people because they're young, they're quick, they're energetic. They're smarter than older people. Older people are just dumb, haphazard, be successful. Homer Simpson has a job in a nuclear power plant.

01:01:03--> 01:01:43

Right. I love Forgive me for speaking so harshly. Homer Simpson. Right, the true value of our time. I'm just kidding. Peter Griffin. Right. May somehow maintains the ability to live in suburban Rhode Island, but he's stupid. Right? So it's not you're smarter than him? Right? The idea is that we've been training in the western, you know, construct to think that elders are just simply foolish, and we're smarter than them. And you'd be probably lying to yourself, if you felt that you never had that thought crossed your mind growing up. My parents don't know what we're talking about. was not either. So backwards. Right. But there is, that's interviews. And there is a lot of truth to wisdom

01:01:43--> 01:02:04

being more important than knowledge. You know, when you look at the eastern concert, by the way, she had, there's constant reference for elders. Last time, right, right. Wouldn't Tom which by the way is such a, it's such a white privilege movie, like white guy travels to Japan, where his most sacred art three days saves them from themselves? Like, that's my privilege all over it, right?

01:02:05--> 01:02:06

No one wants it anymore, okay.

01:02:07--> 01:02:47

But he's learning from someone who's super old, and very wise, and sage, right. So for young people to feel that sort of dominance, or that sort of arrogance over it is still a form of arrogance. For indigenous Muslims born in this country, people who accepted Islam were born here to feel like immigrants are slow or backwards. That's arrogance. for immigrants to feel like Congress are dumb. That's it. These are all manifestations of arrogance. So no one is saying is what I'm saying, in some way, shape, or form you and I probably think that we are better than other people, right? You and I are better than other people. So we have to be very, very careful with this mindset and how to

01:02:47--> 01:03:23

combat it. So he knows that what he says is he says, if you find a deficiency in your skin, and someone else, if I'm looking around the room, and I see all that person, that person and this person, that person, he says, quickly look back at yourself, you just take a break, right? And look back at yourself. He says if you find something wrong with yourself, then he says, the helmet on and so you can look at your own, like don't worry about other people that you only have the ability, he says to worry about others when you're completely free from efficiency. So if you look at yourself, and you say to yourself, I'm perfect, that's when someone now has the right to start looking at

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others. But the trick is, no one will ever be perfect. The problem is something that is called a data set, either urata and Tesco or UVA medical school or even if you have the desire. And your honor is the word that's used here, which means that it is a burning desire. It also means that you really wanted what to look at the flaws of others. You don't want other people you tell me?

01:03:46--> 01:03:47

Huh?

01:03:50--> 01:04:25

You made you makes you feel better about yourself, right? So for me, I'm looking at everyone else in how out of shape they are. And they go in the mirror and I'm like, great, like, I gotta, I gotta be more consumer, I gotta buy some more beer from my house, right? I gotta buy some more reflective surfaces. So I'm reminded they can go worry about that personal insight, right, you got to make sure that you fit in your clothes, right? We love looking at the efficiencies of others, because it reminds us or I'm sorry, it takes away the reminder to us that we have deficiencies. But this arrogance, it's it's maddening and makes a person go spiritually insane, that they lose the ability

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to reflect on themselves, and they only reflect on other people. And this is the son of shame. So the Prophet said, If you find yourself

01:04:33--> 01:04:39

looking for it searching and burning, looking for the flaws of others, he said felt good or you

01:04:41--> 01:04:59

remind yourself of your own flaws and use that energy to focus on that as opposed to other people. Right. So as you scroll through your Instagram feed on social media, or your Twitter feed or your Facebook feed, and you're looking at people's pictures, oh my god, you see their wedding. Oh my god. You see what he was wearing, right? She was wearing

01:05:00--> 01:05:38

You were wearing right? commenting on them, that you and by the way, we're laughing. But I understand. Everyone in this room needs to realize that we are all victims and oppressors of this. I'm not standing up here free from deficiency, reminding you because it's right. No, I'm a peasant myself. And you're above me, perhaps, there are probably many people, all of you in this room who are better than me spiritually. I'm here reminding all of us together that we need to work on this. protect us from these diseases and the diseases of arrogance. Don't worry about others Worry about yourself. The next disease inshallah we'll wrap up shortly, is a disease of hazard. hazard is a very

01:05:38--> 01:05:40

interesting disease, you don't pass it is

01:05:43--> 01:05:52

not jealousy. Actually. Jealousy is like a lower level, the cost at 1.0. Has it is like 2.0. So jealousy is what define jealousy for me.

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When you want something?

01:05:59--> 01:06:36

Very good. That's the distinguishing factor, since you said, when you want something that someone else has, but has said, What's the 2.0? The next level is when you say, I don't want that person to have it, I only want it. And there are some things where this doesn't make any sense, right? If you see a kid, it's kind of funny, you actually see a lot you actually see a lot of diseases of the heart and children. And everyone's like, Oh, my God, stay with children. No, no, what I'm saying is that they're, they're tough, what is not yet trained. And by the way, you also see a lot of purity of children, you basically see, like, human form, in its most raw form when toddlers are funny. So

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you see kids who are like, very jealous and very envious, but you also seem very gracious and merciful. Right? Observe children are very interesting. And they teach you a lot about your naps, and how your system works. So has that is when you say I don't want this person to have it. And do listen, has it is crazy, it can grow. To the point where you start to make comments at one time I did a wedding, right? very awkward is in Southern California, a good friend of ours. And it was actually their engagement. So it wasn't her wedding. It was their engagement, but they want to be there until I give a talk even though there's no like actual proclamation or contract sign of the

01:07:11--> 01:07:47

engagement. They're like No, just make do I just like kind of have a talk we're gonna order some food some needs like enough to feed an entire army of country. So they they order some food, they want some sweets or whatever. And and all their friends over. And you know, there's this interesting culture, my wife is from Bangladesh, by the way, which a lot. I enjoy my much my mom, my boss, right? So. But the point is that I grew up in Chicago, which is like, it makes me an honorary hunter body. So I'm more basic than an Arab, honestly. So when I say when I say there's a flaw in our culture, I'm including myself with you, right? My fellow so common people, there's a farmer culture,

01:07:47--> 01:07:56

okay? When it comes to major life milestones, we start to ask questions of what will they say? Right? Which sounds like which disease

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are too many, right? literally changing your course of action based on the perception of people have you because you were so concerned about what people will say? Well, will they say if this, if this wedding doesn't have 9000 people? What will they say if we don't have seven parties in a week? What will they say that she's not decked in jewelry? Right? Because her cousin was decked jewelry and got to make her better than her cousin. Well, what do you say if he doesn't ride an elephant into the banquet hall? What will they say? Right? It's literally changing our lives. And I'm tired of it. But anyways, I digress. At this engagement party The question was asked what will they say we don't

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invite someone so there are a couple people that didn't want to invite because you know there are certain people that you're close with there's really you're not close with. But what will they say the magic words what will they say listen ask him all day What would he say? So they invited these people okay. And I think it was the most top three awkward scenarios in my life

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when immediately after making their art and I always you know, if you perform marriages or engagements or

01:09:00--> 01:09:27

sorry, you make your emails I will tell you one of the most important there is that we make for couples when they first get married or engaged is all up protect this couple protect them from their own deficiencies from others jealousy from you know, just it's a struggle getting married as the best thing you can ever do is amazing, but it's it's a tough it's a trap. right but it's it's an amazing one. I lost my father bless all of you shovel the righteous 1000s of children. I mean, everyone's like me, right?

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Just talk about her rage in the heart of finding out okay.

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So the second half are making a building draw literally the second half from done May Allah protect this couple they will put them on the straight path. Maybe let them enter agenda holding hands Bella, you know, we give them budget on their life and, and make them an example for all of us. excetera literally, we finished we're cutting the cake. Everyone's happy. Like we're just it's such a warm occasion. The house is so filled with love. One of the people that they didn't want to buy

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One of the people quite literally said out loud to the mother of the bride or the fiance to female fiance. I can't believe that you did this. She was supposed to be for my son.

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I was like, Alright, I'm out of here.

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How can I not do this right now? How's it going man I level has been an

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auctioneer.

01:10:32--> 01:10:32

Don't do that.

01:10:35--> 01:10:48

But I was so blown away that someone had the sheer audacity to like, exhibit their headset to like, it's like bringing out a packet of raw meat, like rotten meat be like here, right? Like, here, here's my

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daughter, as if there's a shortage of human beings on earth to get married here, right almost to me and my argue the art but the point is that that was such a horrible, this fleeting moment for that gathering. And just as we all felt that, like everyone in the room was like, like, I heard the DJ stopping the track in my head.

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Just as everyone in the room felt so bad hearing that statement, and the mother Mashallah Bella blesser, she very gracefully was, like, you know, made her want to get something better than my daughter, but I was like, hey, like, you know,

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like, like, Spike did like a nice little move on that one. She kind of took it and like, turned it back. It was really good. Mashallah. But the point is that, that deflation, that nasty feeling, we still feel that envy in our heart, and we shouldn't feel like only that way when it's in front of us. What about what is inside of us? Right? What about we feel that way? Why is this person getting this, you know, one of the scars to kind of lock in a motive, wrote this famous poem.

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And check out the transitive heart of it. And it's on Kindle, actually, for $1. Now, this ebook, you should get it. It's called purification of heart very good. But

01:12:00--> 01:12:12

he actually said that, he said, listen to this, you might just think it's jealousy. You might just think it's Ed bionics said, he said, How sad is someone being displeased with a loss of wisdom.

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That's powerful. He said that, because when someone is envious, they disagree with the choice and decision that their Lord made in providing these provisions. So hello, that's me. It's not just you want something? Now you're challenging a lot.

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So when someone is full of acid, they're saying, Allah made a mistake, giving it to that person, he should have given it to me instead. And that's way beyond what we think we think of jealousy and envy. May Allah protect us. So number one, when we talk about how sad it is, don't look don't make a habit of looking at the belongings of other people. Just don't make a habit of it. You know, and again, the little kids, you see this a lot, right? They come over to someone's house, for the first time Are they do they start going through drawers or open cabinets, asking what's that? What's that? What's that mean? A bit older? And then how much was that? How much was that?

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And I've seen really, I've seen even like full grown adults who like how much was that in front of an entire gallery? Right? It's very, it's not appropriate, right? Don't be a person who is obsessed with being

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especially other people's things, and asking questions that are prying right. Now, if you're someone who's really close to you, and you're really close to a share, for me, that's fine. It's all as I said, but this is just a general rule. There's exceptions to every release, just generally, don't constantly be looking at other people's things. Also, on social media, how does it apply? Well, there's a lot of studies and actually, there's an article that was released by reputable it was washington post or somebody that said that people on social media have a higher proclivity or inclination to becoming depressed. Why? Because people generally only post happy moments in social

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media. And you know about your sad moments, but you look at everyone else's happy moments, and you think that no one else has sad moments, but you and that is a doorway process, because you start seeing all this good happening, but you go to someone's timeline, you scroll, and they're just Good, good. Good. Great, good, good. And you're like, man, where's their flat tire that I had today? Right? Where's their job review that it goes so well with mine? Where's the Where's their miscarriage? like buying this summer? Where's not my personal but I have friends who unfortunately, may Allah reward them for their child with difficulty. Where's their miscarriage? Where's their

01:14:32--> 01:14:59

divorce? Where's it? All these trials that we go through? No one is immune from trial and testing, right? No one, it's a sign that Allah loves you that he's putting you through it. And he's elevating you closer to them. Because we make drama and tough times. We don't make as much good times do we? When times are tough. That's what we talk about on the forum at times are good. We raise your hand up hot so when I launch you closer to him, he puts something heavy on you. So you go back to the floor, because he knows he'll come back. Right? So when we look at other people's difficulties, or I'm sorry, they're easy time to do

01:15:00--> 01:15:23

difficulties, it opens the door for us to be envious for them. So don't make it a habit of just looking at people's thing and their good thing. And when someone is going through good times, I don't want you to do that, but they probably have a horrible life anyway. No, that's not a good way to go over it. Just say when you see someone else's good things say what Masha Allah What does that mean? Literally, it wasn't about me. It is what I wanted. What an amazing way that Kirk has said.

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That's what it's about.

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When you say much on life, not just like, it's not just like a ritual. It's actually a reminder for the person to remind themselves that this is not the will of this person, brothers will upon my Lord and their Lord, right. So this is a good way to Chatelet might have said May Allah protect us humans are horrible disease. The Prophet system said that has said burns good deeds like fire burns, dry wood,

01:15:51--> 01:16:15

acid burns, good deeds, like carbons dry. But the last that I'll talk about tonight chocolate is the disease of apathy, apathy, and entitlement. We'll put it all together inshallah. And this is a disease that's primarily affecting our young people. And I just want to be very open. I don't want to do, like, open, open drive to like sugarcoat things, and I feel okay. All right, put a spin on it. I'm not quite sure. Um,

01:16:17--> 01:16:56

two things. Number one, is social media is constantly bombarding us with information. And that information is causing us to be desensitized. And to be less caring about the realities of other people, because we're always exposed to it. There was an article, it's kind of funny, my friend actually told me about an article that said that no one reads the content of writings anymore. They just read the title. Right? Is it? Yeah, they said, the study that the average person spent on an article is 20 seconds. They read the title, the subtitle, and they leave. And what's really interesting, is that, tell me more about what you're saying. He's,

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like, he caught himself. He's like, Oh, my God.

01:17:04--> 01:17:05

Am I just a part of the study?

01:17:08--> 01:17:47

He discovered the matrix or something. But anyway, the point is that when you get hit with so much information, and you're constantly looking at a screen, right, you're constantly going to screen, you begin to develop just like, maybe resentment, maybe anger, maybe whatever it is depression, like sadness, overwhelming, like, you just get overwhelmed. And you begin to just now like, not care about events or news, and you hear like a tsunami or, oh, that's horrible. Right? As opposed to like actually letting that, you know, hit you. You guys know, the picture of a young boy who drowned at sea, the refugee man was caught up at the refugees and uplift them and maybe like, destroy those.

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We're destroying Syria, but I had to show you the Prophet says, Have you made special offers, show me a special offer shout out to destroy all oppressors and tyrants and just get rid of them, and just open up and liberate people from their shackles that they've been having.

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So when, when, when we saw that picture of that young boy, on the on the beach, you know, you know, if he had been brought short of the waves, one of the most disturbing questions that people have for me in my inbox that day, was ice. You know, they say, they said to me, really quick that I scroll through, I saw people having such an emotional reactions to this. And I didn't feel anything. I didn't even feel sad when I saw it, and I'm just like, that's, that's the world, I guess. And they just kept scrolling. And they said, What? What's wrong with me? Right? What's wrong with me that people are feeling this and I'm not feeling it? What am I done? And I, you know, after some

01:18:46--> 01:19:02

conversation, I couldn't respond to all of them. But after one or two, I answered, I said, you know, do you like what do you do with your spare time? I'm always like, playing video games, or watching movies or reading, you know, my Facebook timeline, I'm always engaged with something, never time just to be

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every time just to meditate on the world, like what's happening around me just doing something always. And the problem is that, you know, when you constantly are using your brain or neglecting your heart, it becomes like, there's a district like spiritual disagree that this really happened. Like it loses its capacity to feel. And so I spoke to one brother in particular in the revenue that I offered to him was, you know, go and just go somewhere outside of the city, outside of the business wherever you live, and go to like nature and just sit just reflect on what's been caused creation for a while. Just read, like, revive your heart a little bit, right? You know, obviously

01:19:40--> 01:20:00

report and pray, things like that, but go and look at things that are not synthetic, okay, real things. Because real recognize real, right, your heart is real and it will that will recognize real and if we're constantly bombarded with social media and new things, we're going to be apathetic, may Allah protect us from that? Because this person's kind of love. I cannot tell you how much fear I felt

01:20:00--> 01:20:03

In their tone of their message, when they said What is wrong with me?

01:20:04--> 01:20:42

Right. So don't become so addicted to social media and screens and, and just everything where things that normally should rattle the human soul, don't rattle your mind. Right? Spend time, unplug, disconnect, and you're not. So he says, If you spend time online, you are off, like, get back on life and get home, get back online, offline, do things that people have conversations with real people don't always be going through, you know, as a mental health counselor can be really scary. There's a proposal in the ethics for mental health counseling, that is encouraging Skype counseling to become the default counseling medium.

01:20:43--> 01:20:57

I want you to think about that Skype counseling to become the medium, the default medium, the connection between to a counselor and a client. You know why that's scary to me, because it's showing you that people are more comfortable conversing over

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webcam than real life.

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They're more comfortable talking from behind the screen. What does that mean indication of our complete and total submission to this stuff, we have to break free, we have to break free from it. And to show people that the world is much bigger than a 4.7 inch screen and LTE. Right, we have to we have to do that. The second disease that I wanted to highlight not into this trauma is the disease of entitlement. The disease of my tweets are published those I have an opinion assigned, right, everyone else is wrong. Right. And there's something unique about the internet that causes one to believe that when they hit send, they're part of now this like epic, published Journal of

01:21:40--> 01:22:01

opinion and thought, we all need to really underestimate we don't really need to really understand that opinions. You You and I our opinions are one over 7 billion means nothing, it's nothing but a blip on the radar, right? But if your opinion is backed by the speech of a law, his words and by the example.

01:22:02--> 01:22:43

And by the wisdom of our teachers, our female and male scholars are mentors, like our chocolate, Mashallah Dr. Adi, if your opinions are backed by grounded, you know, anchored foundational thought that Allah has given to us, then your opinion means much more. But just putting a tweet or putting something out there, it doesn't do anything. And one of my teachers he actually calls it slacktivism not activism, because we feel like retweeting something about Palestine isn't a fix Palestine. But then we displeasure because we're up tweeting about Palestine. Right, or that we feel like sharing a status about Syria and then help fix Syria. But then we're doing it from like a bar, right? But we

01:22:43--> 01:22:55

need to really check ourselves and realize that just putting pixels onto a screen is not actually accomplishing very much. But behind it and why why do some things go viral? You guys on the clockmaking kid.

01:22:57--> 01:23:07

He lives down the street from Oh, by the way, he's just some like nerdy get a love to get some dirty demos. I love you. Like I always felt like there was a picture of him today with the Prime Minister of Turkey. He's like,

01:23:08--> 01:23:10

he's gonna start we're gonna play with leaf spot.

01:23:12--> 01:23:46

But I'm at the coffee clinic. Why did he go so viral is one of the brothers today that I hang out with. And he made a joke. He was like, I did something terrible because I'm interested. Oh, why did I go famous? Right? Please ask me that question. The point is that unless my college chooses some people and gives them to you, and test them in certain ways, like admits his writings, all right now, everyone's like, Oh my god, guaranteed acceptance to MIT job waiting from Facebook. But what? That's good, but a lot of tests are good to write and inshallah he'll pass. He has great parents. He has, he has a great soul. He's a good kid, Charlie, he'll pass. I'm not saying oh, wait for it to

01:23:46--> 01:24:02

fail. We'll be celebrating Ventura. We're community of cynics. No. Right. He'll do well, but the point is that don't interpret someone else's good to be like, Oh, that's it. I mean, they made it we're not Calvinist you know, Calvinist you know, they believe their theology was that of God gave you money. Love you.

01:24:03--> 01:24:05

Our theology is that the first good agenda or Who?

01:24:06--> 01:24:07

The core

01:24:09--> 01:24:45

Calvinists said, that have gotten any money, you're going to paradise a lot. And the problem is awesome. So the first step to paradise will be before we can have like real dismembers do write tests make strong emotional love. So I've met when he when he's going through this entire process, it's still that that publishing that opinion that putting up with that opinion, those things that he's sharing the things that people are saying about, everyone felt the need to jump in, everyone felt the need to jump in and start talking. Why because social media has made us feel like our opinion matters so much. But really, in all reality, your opinion is not all that important, right?

01:24:45--> 01:25:00

Unless it's back into the truth. Because the opinions can be false or truthful. So make sure that your opinion is well researched. Make sure that you don't speak too much and too frequently. Make sure you don't speak always publicly, right. Make sure you keep something

01:25:00--> 01:25:10

Internally I want to share everything and more importantly, the most important make sure that whatever you say on social media that you back it with the truth is found in the book example.

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So do some research before speaking inshallah that's to me before anybody else does that. I hope inshallah we all benefited from tonight's gathering. I hope that we leave this gathering with pure hearts when we get when we came in. I hope that we shed some light together and we've constructed some knowledge on the perspective of social media in your heart, and I prayed a lot from product does not make us does not allow us to be people about who he described, that they say things with their tongue which is not in their heart over