Why I Left Christianity Part 2

Yusha Evans

Date:

Channel: Yusha Evans

File Size: 20.67MB

Share Page

Episode Notes

Yusha Evans is a former devout student ot the Bible and was on his way to becoming a biblical scholar. He recounts his journey to Islam and shares his amazing story with us.

Related

WARNING!!! AI generated text may display inaccurate or offensive information that doesn’t represent Muslim Central's views. Therefore, no part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.

AI Generated Transcript ©


00:00:03--> 00:00:24

And asked him, and over and over again, you'll see that this now Jesus describes God. Because when one men came to him and asked him, he said, Oh, good Master, tell me, how do I go to heaven? Jesus didn't even answer his question. He asked him a question. He said, Why are you calling me good? For there is no one that is good except for one, and that is God, and all good emanates from him.

00:00:25--> 00:01:09

Jesus immediately just disassociated himself from being called what only you should call God. Immediately he does that. He said, Don't call me good. Because there's only one that's good. And that's God. And he said, also, about God, he said, Do do good works before men, so that they may glorify your Father, Who is in heaven. He didn't say, Your father was standing right here. He also said that no man had seen God at any time. No one has any man heard his voice. No man has seen God at any time. Now there is another version of where we're in the in the New Testament where is quoted as Jesus saying, those who have seen me have seen the Father. Now either they translated it wrong,

00:01:09--> 00:01:48

either the understanding is wrong, or you have two contradictory statements, because Jesus saying you can't see God. And now you're trying to tell me, he said that if you see me, you seen God. So there's a problem here, but I'm going with the stuff that is the majority. I'm not going with a little minority things that Christians like to pick out and divert people from seeing the reality of the issue. Also, when a man came to Jesus, and asked him about salvation, justification, he came to me said, Oh, good, he came to me said, Tell me, the master, how do I inherit eternal life? A rich man came to Jesus, and said, Tell me how to go to heaven. Since you are who you say you are, then

00:01:48--> 00:02:27

tell me how do I go to heaven? Now I now to me, if Jesus his whole life mission was to come and live on this earth for 33 years, and to die on the cross for the salvation of the sins of humanity, and that by believing in that blood sacrifice, you could obtain salvation. He is the chance to say it, because apparently there's people watching because someone wrote it down. What did Jesus say to the man, he said, the way to go to South to Heaven is to follow the law, obey the commandments, obey the commandments of God, follow God's law. And this is how you can go to heaven. And the man said, I've done that. He said, Well, if you've really done that, he tried it. At that point, if you really done

00:02:27--> 00:02:38

that, you're so rich, give up all your wealth, and then come help me. Because if you are perfect, according to the law, then you need to be doing you need to be helping me. The man walked away crying, because he knew he was not. He was not doing all he should be doing.

00:02:39--> 00:02:45

And also, I realized that Jesus, I'm gonna be done in about 20 minutes, I also realized that Jesus

00:02:46--> 00:03:23

was not sent to me to the teachings of the New Testament, Jesus was sent to the children of Israel alone. We believe in him, as a Muslim, we believe in him, but he was not our Prophet. He was the prophet of many Israel. He was not for us, we believe in him. But he was not for us. That's why when he returns, he will not return in the position of prophethood, he will not return in the position of a prophet, because he was a prophet for a time and a place in that time and place past. Because Jesus himself even says in the New Testament, that I was not sin, but to the lost sheep of the house of Israel. That's it. And this was the problem that you enter Israel. Now, I'm going to tell you,

00:03:23--> 00:03:58

this is going to give you the whole summary of what Jesus was all about. Even from the New Testament, the children of Israel were very diverted, they had deviated far away from God at this point. And what was happening was that the Pharisees there was a group known as the Pharisees, they were the scholars, they were the man of the Benny Israel, they were the the key holders of the temple. They were the one who went in and did the sacrifices in the in the temple in the holiest of holies. They were the ones who collected all the money. They were the ones who were there at that time, with the most rich, the most powerful, the most astute amongst the tuner, Israel. But the

00:03:58--> 00:04:20

biggest problem was that they were corrupt to the bone. And they were using God's law and God's religion, to subjugate the people and keep the people ignorant, to keep the people poor, and to make themselves richer, and to make themselves more prominent, and establish themselves as the leaders and the rulers and everyone else just had to do what they said and follow the way that they told him to follow it, or else they were all going to hell basically.

00:04:21--> 00:05:00

So they were using religion, to subjugate the people. They were using finance, to subjugate the people, they were using their everything they could to keep the people ignorant and in poverty. And honestly, this is some of the same trickery that is being used to subjugate people all throughout the world and Muslims, the majority, the majority of us, Muslims, all throughout the world are being subjugated by these very, very same means. So this is what they were doing. And Jesus came to knock them off that pedestal, the Pharisees, he came to let them know that this is not the way it should be run. That's why one of Jesus's first instance in one of his

00:05:00--> 00:05:30

First things when he entered into Jerusalem now he was not born in Jerusalem. He was born in Nazareth or Bethlehem. We don't know. Because the the the Bible says two different things, two different things. One says he's born in Bethlehem, one second is born in Nazareth. But anyway, when he entered into Jerusalem, one of the first things he did or last, we don't know that either, because there's two different narrations of the same story. But one of them says the one of the first things he did when he entered Jerusalem, he went into the temple. And he saw that there were people changing money. You know how we change money, you know, you go and you change this for that,

00:05:30--> 00:06:04

because there was different types of money. You're talking about the the cradle cradle of civilization, there was different monies passing through. So there were money changers who had tables set up in the synagogue in the masjid. They had tables set up to change money. What did Jesus do? He went in and flipped the tables, and kicked out all of the money changes, and said, this is the word the house of God, this is not the place for that. kick them out. We know what Islam the same way you don't do business in here. You do it outside. So he flipped him out. And he came to tell the Pharisees, when he came to do was to teach the people and the Pharisees that God's religion

00:06:04--> 00:06:46

and God's law was not for the subjugation of people and nations. It was for the betterment of the human society was the better for the betterment of human civilization. And no one, no one had a monopoly on it. No one had a monopoly on it. So he came in became a threat to the ruling elite of his time, this was his biggest crime. He also came to revive the law of Moses, because the law of Moses had become very strict because of their rebellious ness. But Jesus came to tell them that look, I not only am I and the Prophet, not only am I your Messiah that has been promised to you since the time of Adam. But I've also come to less less than the restrictions on you from the law.

00:06:46--> 00:07:07

We know this from the Quran, he says, I came to make that allow for you, which was before haram for you. He came to fix some of their because we think that the jury is strict, you have not seen strict until you see Hasidic Jewish law. You're not seeing strict strict. That's because the rebelliousness So Jesus came to, to bring order back to the law of Moses and the religion of CNN.

00:07:09--> 00:07:51

His biggest crime was what he was doing to the Pharisees. He was threatening their power. He was threatening their status. He was disrupting social order as it was in the day. And let me tell you something, I don't care who you are. I don't care what your message is, I don't care how crazy of a crackpot in a desperate you may be, the moment you threaten the elite, the moment you threaten the social status of the day in the social order and the ruling class and how they are doing business, the moment you become a threat to that, and the moment your message becomes a threat to that, and the moment your way of life becomes a threat to that you will become public enemy number one, and

00:07:51--> 00:08:28

you will be targeted for this reason alone. If nothing else, let me tell you that just search through history. And this is should be a lesson for the Muslims that this is the threat that we pose to the world today. And the ruling elite is that not because we are crazy. It's not because we are backwards. It's not because we are all these crazy things they want to call us that's just a cover up. That's just icing, they try to put on the cake to the fact that they know that Islam has an end to their reign. They know that Islam is an end to this social status of using the means that they have to subjugate the people and to keep them ignorant and to keep them poor and to keep them in

00:08:28--> 00:09:11

poverty and to steal away their resources. This is the threat that Islam is facing the world on right now. And if that's the threat than 100 May Allah make us successful in AI endeavors. But this was the threat that Jesus Christ was to the many Israelis. And this is why he became public enemy number one. This is why he became he became the terrorist of his day, he became the number one terrorist to the to the ban Israel and the ruling elite of that day. And he was marked. He became a marksmen. As you know that mark man they they they issued a fatwa on him for his death. They had to get him by any means necessary. But they had to figure out a way to do it. You can't just kill this

00:09:11--> 00:09:15

man off, you know. And I'll tell you that they didn't want to just kill him.

00:09:16--> 00:09:20

Killing him off would not have accomplished their goal. If they would have just killed him.

00:09:21--> 00:09:37

No one would have done anything. Jesus had no tribe. He was from Nazareth or Bethlehem both of those he had no, he didn't have a father. He according to his statements, he had no father so he has no what tribe what tribe you're going to bring. You have no father, you have no tribe. And

00:09:38--> 00:09:59

not only that, but they would not accomplish their goal. And their goal was not only to kill Jesus and get rid of him by any means necessary, but their goal was to discredit him. This is what they had to do is discredit who he is saying he is he saying he's our Messiah. He's saying that he is the Messiah that we have been waiting on.

00:10:00--> 00:10:43

For so long, but yet he's not sitting in the throne of Solomon ruling the whole world. That's what they thought. This You see, this is their problem is they thought that their Messiah, they still think this and this I debate with him on this a lot. They think that their Messiah should come and sit on the Temple of Solomon, and rule the world with an eye in hand, when Jesus tried to explain to them that you have the interpretation wrong, I am not coming to give you a rule of this world, this world means nothing, this world is going to come and go, he said, the rule I have come in to give you the kingdom, My kingdom is the kingdom of the hereafter. This is what I'm trying to bring you

00:10:43--> 00:11:24

to, to bring you to the kingdom of the hereafter not of this world. But we know that this is the Jews had become so entranced by this world, that's all they could see that all success is only here. And we know this, Allah subhana wa tada has told us this, he has told us this, that they love this world so much, that if you were to give them a life of 1000 years, it wouldn't be enough. If you to give them a life of 1000 years, it would not be enough. And they say they're attached to God. Allah says that if they tell them that if you are truthful, than what wish for their, Allah says, but they will never do it. And this is the Jews that Jesus was dealing with. They were so entrapped in this

00:11:24--> 00:11:34

world that if Jesus was not going to give them the world, they were going to get rid of him. And this was nothing new. This was what they had done with many profits in the past, just gotten rid of them.

00:11:35--> 00:12:06

So this was what they decided to do. We have to get rid of Jesus, we have to shut him up. We have to shut up his message. And we have to discredit him. And there was one way to do this. And the way to do this was crucifixion, took we can crucify him. Why? Actually, Paul, the apostle teaches this Why? Because Paul was a faricy, he understood the law. So he knew that when he became Paul the apostate, you know, none would call him Paul the apostle, he left the right religion with the law of Moses, and he could have just left that for apostasy.

00:12:07--> 00:12:47

He taught in Galatians, that Jesus Christ was cursed on behalf of the law to remove us from the curse of the law, for his written everything that hangs on a tree, his curse. This taught me three things. Number one, Paul was crazy. Number two, Paul directly contradicts Jesus Christ in every single thing. He says, because Jesus taught that the law was salvation. Paul teaches that the salvation that law is cursed, and that by following the law, you would never reach salvation, the salvation is in abandoning the law and just believing in faith, directly, contradiction, the message of Jesus. And number three, he teaches us why they crucified Jesus that why they tried to crucify

00:12:47--> 00:13:29

Jesus, why they wanted to crucify Jesus was Paul quoted from Deuteronomy. And Deuteronomy says that if you crucify a criminal, do not let him hang on the tree overnight, bring him down that same day and bury them for they are cursed, and people who are crucified according to the law of Moses, they are cursed criminals, that means that they are cursed in this life. And in the next life, there is nothing for them, you have done your there is an X on your soul forever. So they realized that Jesus is now coming to say he is the fulfillment of the law of Moses. He's saying that he's coming to fulfill the law of Moses, if we can crucify him, as a criminal to that very law, he looks like the

00:13:29--> 00:13:42

biggest idiot and liar and hypocrite on the face of the earth. So if we can find him a crime, if we can crucify him and get him found guilty of a crime that is worthy of crucifixion, and crucify him.

00:13:43--> 00:13:48

They've done this the arrogance of the Jews, we can kill the Messiah of God.

00:13:49--> 00:14:26

So they tried to crucify Jesus. And when Jesus came to find out, and the way they decided to get him crucified was by taking statements that he had said, twisting them to say that he's calling himself God. He's calling himself the King of the Jews. And at one time, people at the Christians will say, I don't even know they were doing that. I said, Let me prove to you one time how they did that. There's one thing that is left in the New Testament, that shows one point where they tried to trick him. They tried to trick him. When they came to him and asked him, should we pay Caesar taxes? They came to that and asked Jesus, should we pay Caesars taxes? Because they knew if he was to say no,

00:14:27--> 00:15:00

he's a criminal, right? Then he becomes a what is the word they use? treason, that's treason, to say, you know, he's preaching now that you should rebel against Caesar. They knew that if we can do that, we'll get him killed right away. What did Jesus say he tricked them to? He said give Caesar what Caesar's and give God was Gods. They left angry. So they had to find other ways and they eventually convinced Pontius to recruit to want to crucify him. And when Jesus found out about this when he realized they were going to crucify him, was he happy. I thought if he's going to

00:15:00--> 00:15:36

Come live on the earth that his whole point was to be crucified. He should be happy, right? This is not the Jesus you find Jesus in the Bible runs, he leaves where he's at when he hears about this, and he goes to the garden and gets 70. He goes to the garden and gets 70, which is on the outskirts of Jerusalem. And he tells his disciples stay at the gate, he tells the huadian, stay at the gate and watch why. So nobody comes against me, I have something I need to do. Jesus had something he needed to do. So what do you do we walk down the road, he fell on his face. And the Bible describes it that he prayed so feverishly that his sweat became as drops of blood.

00:15:38--> 00:16:28

Let me tell you that this is scientifically possible for you to bleed out of your sweat glands, but it has to be under the most extreme extreme distress, it can happen. So whatever Jesus was asking for this time, was very, very serious. And what was he asking for? Was he asking for the strength to be able to do the mission that he was sent for? He asked, God, let this cup pass from me. Do not let them crucify me. Do not let me be crucified. Because Jesus understood what they were trying to do. And he knew that if he was crucified, that's it. His message is over. what he's done is rubbish. He will not be believed in if they can crucify him, but, but as a submissive slave, he says, but

00:16:28--> 00:16:37

whatever you will, that's what I'll do. Meaning that I don't want to be crucified, but God if it's your will, for me to be crucified. Cardinal law you will measure

00:16:38--> 00:16:41

is the will of a lion. He does whatever he wills.

00:16:42--> 00:17:20

And we know that anytime a prophet makes dawn like this, from our Rokita as a Muslim, anytime a prophet makes this type of dua, it is answered, It is answered Allah Subhana what Allah does not ignore his prophets. And we also know from the teachings of our soul, the loss of the law, honey was seldom, he said, that every prophet and this is the beauty of our Deen and this is why we love our souls solo hunting send them so much. We love him so much. Because he said, every prophet had a DA, that Allah would answer. every prophet was given one free pass that you can ask to offer me for whatever you want, and I will give it to you.

00:17:22--> 00:17:40

And he said that every prophet made their door in their lifetime, except for me. So we this, this could have been Jesus's ticket. He could have been saying, Look, I've got this free door. I needed right now, if I ever needed it, boy, do I need it now. And we know that a lot did answer that and save them from crucifixion. Even in the Bible, it can be proven.

00:17:42--> 00:18:10

But also Sarah Selim said every prophet use their due on their lifetime except for me, I saved mine to the Day of Judgment for you. So planula sub Memorial, and he said, he saved it for us his dollar that Allah promised would answer, he knew we would need it. So he saved it to the Day of Judgment. And that will be the dollar that he will say, when he goes in prostrates, before loss upon what the island says, my own. My own man forgives him.

00:18:11--> 00:18:30

This is why we live out of socialism so much. But so I realized Jesus could not be crucified. There's problems all throughout this crucifixion. And now I have major problems. And I want to get to the end. So I went through and started asking a lot of people a lot of questions. And I finally asked my textual textual critic, Professor Bob Jones University about this.

00:18:32--> 00:19:04

And you know what he told me, he told me, Josh, what the Bible is a book written by the hands of men and women, passed down through 1000s of years copied by the hands of men and women, 1000s and hundreds of 1000s of times, and they made mistakes, and they're copying. And some people came and added mistakes. And some people came and added more mistakes. Some people, some scribes would read a read something in the grammar wasn't right. So they would just fix it. Some scribes would copy a book, and the theology of the book would not be fitting with what they are being taught. So they would just change the book to make it fit. And then the originals got lost. So then then no one,

00:19:04--> 00:19:25

there's no way to check the original. So people then just started making up things and saying it was this and then this and that, he said, and the scholars have tried their best to come to the original conclusion of what the author may have wrote. But they have only done the best. So what you have in your hands is a book written by men and women who left their fingerprints on it. And it is not perfect. So this is why I told him, I said, You know what?

00:19:28--> 00:19:29

I said, this is not God's book.

00:19:31--> 00:19:59

He's like, why? No, no, he told me but the people who believe in it, this book, they believe in it by faith. Here we go again. And that is that faith, which leads them to salvation. I said, That's number one. That's foolishness. What you just told me, it's craziness. Number two, this cannot be God's book. And I'll tell you why. I said God is perfect. Everything about him is perfect. Therefore, his religion should be perfect. His profits should be perfect. His book should be perfect.

00:20:00--> 00:20:37

Everything about his way of life and his method of operation should be perfect. His prophets in this book are not perfect. This book is not perfect. So either either I have a problem understanding God or this is not God's book. So I left Christianity altogether. And I started to look for the religion of God, because I knew God existed no fool in his right mind was ever going to convince me that God didn't exist. I was a student of astronomy, and I've loved astronomy, all my life is one of the most fascinating subjects I've ever dealt with. And you're not going to tell me by looking at all of this, this around me that it happened by chance. I'm not that much of a fool I was raised with a

00:20:37--> 00:21:12

little more sense. So I started searching, studying other religions. I studied Judaism, Buddhism, Hinduism, Taoism, Confucianism, Wiccan, which is a magic and all that good stuff. I studied, I was a martial artist, all my life, I had two black belts and was working on my third. So I studied Bushido, which is the samurai code of conduct, and I read the Agricola, you know, all of that. But there was one condition I had, if I was going to accept another religion. Number one, I had to be perfect. And number two, there had to be something they could take and tangibly placed in my hands, to show me the validity of your religion. And you know why? Because my grandfather used to always

00:21:12--> 00:21:35

tell me and I remember this at this point in my life, whenever I would tell him, you know, how we tell our parents, I swear, that's the truth. That's the truth. I'm telling the truth. I would come on. We know our kids tell us all the time, you know, they told us, we told this to our parents, my grandfather would always rebuttal to me, he would say, Well, you know what, young men, the truth always comes with proof. So if you tell me the truth, where you prove,

00:21:36--> 00:22:10

he told me the truth always comes with proof. So if somebody tells you, they're saying the truth, you ask them for proof, and if they can't give it to you, it's rubbish. So this was I wanted I wanted, I didn't want you to just tell me your religion. I wanted you to prove it to me. Prove it, prove it, prove it. So I read the the Torah again from the from the Jews who said that even the one in the Bible is a little messed up. So I read this still messed up. I read the Talmud messed up, I read the some of the Vedas, some, for those of you from the Southeast Asian continent know that in 30 years, I could not have read all the Vedas. But I did read the Bhagavad Gita and some other ones

00:22:10--> 00:22:28

messed up Hinduism, you don't really need to read all the Vedas, to see their foolishness and you can just study their, their basic belief system that they you know, that they Krishna is told, you know, she was a husband or they slept with his sister, and you know, all kinds of crazy stuff, man, they warring with each other, and one of them killed the other one. And

00:22:29--> 00:22:31

it sounds like a soap opera rather than a religion to me.

00:22:33--> 00:22:59

I read the teachings of Tao, I read the teachings of Buddha, which I don't know why Buddhism is a religion, because Buddha never mentioned God. He never even alludes to the fact that God and even his illusions, even doubt that there is a God, I read the teachings of Confucius, I read the Wiccan book of spells, I read the hang of Cordray, the samurai Code of Conduct pretty good for some of the things other than if you're dishonored, you, you know, stick your toe in the ground and jump on it. But there's a lot of things that are messed up in there.

00:23:00--> 00:23:38

And what I saw was much of the same things, some things that were logical, some things that were rational. And this is one thing that the textual critic professor told me that I could not believe he told me that the reason people believe in the Bible is because they have faith beyond the reason to understand they have faith beyond the reason of understanding. And that I told him, I said, So you mean, you want me to take my same logic, rationality that God gave me as a gift to understand him, and turn it off in order to understand his religion? This is craziness. He gave me my intellect for reason. God's way should agree with reason and intellect. And this is what I found other

00:23:38--> 00:24:09

religions, this was not the case. And I read a book about Islam. And the book about Islam said that Muslims mo s le m, that's derogatory word in the Arabic language. He said that it said that Muslims worship the moon God called the law who lived in a box in the desert in Saudi Arabia, and that Muslims had many wives, and they beat all the time. And that the greatest duty of a Muslim was to kill a non Muslim at any time at any place without discretion, and that by doing so they would get virgins when they went to heaven. So needless to say, I put the book about Islam back on the shelf, you know, and I went like this to try to mark Islam off my list. You know, I didn't want anybody to

00:24:09--> 00:24:19

see that I even had the word Islam on my paper. And I said that if I accepted a religion, it, it will definitely not be Islam. And if I ever see a Muslim, I will hit him. And I'll probably call the FBI.

00:24:20--> 00:24:30

I said, but I don't live anywhere. There's ever Muslims. I've never seen a Muslim in my life, except when I travel to New York with my father. And I was living in South Carolina. So there's no Muslims here. I might not ever go back to New York of Israel, Muslims are.

00:24:31--> 00:25:00

So I at this point, I wrote religion off in my life. I wrote God off. And I decided that if God wasn't going to show me the right way, I was going to show him how I can do my own thing. So I began to live a life according to my desires, and I'm a perfectionist at heart. This is just my modus operandi is I'm a perfectionist, this drives my family crazy. I don't do anything without I'm gonna try to excel at it. And I'm, I always let people know that I'm not going to do anything without trying to beat you at it and try to be better than you at it.

00:25:00--> 00:25:33

This is just my nature. If I was a Christian I was going to be the best one I was going to try to do the best that I could I was gonna try to outrun everybody. If I was going to be a Buddhist, I would have been orange ro orange thing and sandals if I was going to be a Jew would have been curls, and I would have probably moved to Israel. And you know, all this other craziness. If I was going to be a Wiccan, I've been putting spells and everyone I knew, you know. So when I went after the dunya, when I went off to the streets, I became a proper, you know, street credential thug. You know, I wanted to be the proper street gangster. And I was I had a lot of catching up to do. And so I was ready to

00:25:33--> 00:25:40

knock over as many people as I could to get to the top. And I was doing it trying to do it as rapidly as I could. I was drinking, partying, the whole thing. And since

00:25:42--> 00:26:17

I had an anger issue, I was angry at everything. And at that point, I thought I was Bruce Lee reincarnated. So anyone that that gave me the opportunity to prove that I was going to do that. So I was getting a lot of fights, they got me into a lot of trouble. One of them got me arrested, because I'd beat up a young man at a payphone because he would not get off of it quick enough. So I promptly made him get off of it. And just so happens, he was the son of a judge who heard criminal cases, who made sure he heard my case. And the worst part about it is I didn't even get to use the phone because I smashed it over the young man's head and broke it. So I was going down the wrong road to

00:26:17--> 00:26:28

things change that because I want to get to the end. The first thing that changed that was I got into a car accident that I should not have lived from me and my friend were partying at Clemson University. Oh, yeah. Remember the scholarship I told you about? lost it.

00:26:30--> 00:27:04

lost it because of the fight. But I was partying at Clemson one day, and on the way back, me and my friend got into a car accident where we destroyed the car, we flipped it over and over and over and the car broke into pieces. And when the state trooper came, he saw the wreck. And he said that I've been to a lot of wrecks. And people don't live through wrecks like this. And you boys are standing here looking at me and unharmed. My friend had a broken ankle, I had to cut my arm. He said and he told me that I tell this the same to people who have things like this happen in the life that this does not happen without God's hand playing a role in it. You are still alive for a reason. God has

00:27:04--> 00:27:21

continued your life for a purpose, and you need to figure out what it is. I left and I in my head. I'm thinking, you know, the man's out of his mind. You know, God, if he had a purpose for me, he had the chance to show it to me and he didn't. So I looked at my friend, I was like, you know, he must be talking about you. You know, God must have a purpose for you. Maybe save me just to keep you alive. So appreciate it.

00:27:22--> 00:28:02

later on. A couple months later, a couple of weeks later, I went to New York City to visit my father but I decided not to visit my father I decided just to go party. Me and my friend decided to go up there and party we lied to my parents and told him where we were going. And we went to New York. And I got robbed at gunpoint at an ATM machine and get a man put a gun in my face. And he had the intention of rob me, but he was not going to take the chance that I got away. So he put the gun in my face and pulled the trigger and tried to blow my head off. In Brooklyn, New York tried to blow my face off. Never forget on Fulton Avenue, tried to take my head off at ATM machine. And the gun

00:28:02--> 00:28:39

didn't go off. And we ended up in a struggle and I got away. I ended up knocking him down and ended up running away. And when I told my grandmother about this incident, because I started to have nightmares, bad nightmares about these incidents. And I started waking up screaming and sweating and all that good stuff. My grandmother told me that God has a purpose for your life. Like, here we go again. She said God has a purpose for your life. And he's really has tried to show it to you. And if you do not see it, you're the most ignorant person I've ever met. And I did not raise an ignorant person. And if your grandfather were alive when she had passed away in 93, he would beat you

00:28:39--> 00:28:50

probably till up and down the street and back, which he would have, I would have been getting away with all that stuff anyway, she said, so you need to figure out what God's purposes. I said, I've already tried. I didn't find God. She said God didn't go any way.

00:28:51--> 00:28:55

You just haven't looked in the right place yet. She didn't tell me to go to church or anything. So.

00:28:57--> 00:29:36

So I became a deist, who believes in God without a religion. And at that point in my life, I was 18 years old, I began to get on my hands and knees and ask God that if you want me to know the truth, you need to guide me, because this is how prophets preyed on hands and knees. So I got out of my hands and knees and said, God, if you want me to know the truth, here I am. It's probably your last chance Take it or leave it. Eventually I met a Muslim. And this Muslim I had known throughout high school, but I never knew as a Muslim. Number one because he was an African American. Not all Muslims are Arabs. Number two, I did not know he was a Muslim because I didn't know the Muslims along with

00:29:36--> 00:29:42

their worship their moon God and beating their wives and killing non Muslims. I didn't know that they could sell drugs, which was what this guy did for a living.

00:29:44--> 00:29:52

So I was at his house one day, and me and my friend were debating about religion. And he said to me, have you ever heard about Islam? And like, yeah.

00:29:54--> 00:29:58

All about that one. He was like, Well, I'm a Muslim. I was like,

00:30:00--> 00:30:13

A moment quick joke, you know me, you know, like, I'm talking about real Islam you're talking about like Nation of Islam and 5%. You know, I mean, that's not what I'm talking about. He's like, No, no, no, I'm a real Muslim. I was like, You can't be a real Muslim man you black is that you think I don't know that.

00:30:16--> 00:30:34

And I told him, I said, but all Muslims, the Arabs, he's like, no, the nice actually, is that actually the smallest minority of Muslims or Arabs? And I told him the other things I knew about Islam. He was like, man, wouldn't he who have you been reading? This is this is probably written by someone who hates Islam. He said, actually, Islam is probably the complete opposite of everything you read.

00:30:35--> 00:31:09

So I asked him, What is this lamb about? He told me, I cannot tell you because I'm not the best Muslim. I don't even really practice my religion the way I'm supposed to. He said, but I can show you somewhere to go. You can come with me and I can take you to where they know about it. And I was like, Okay, well, he said, meet me on Friday at the mosque for Juma. I was like, Okay, I understood me Friday. Then you lost me with musk in June. He said, the mosque is just like a church. And joma is just like church service with no cheese. said okay, cheers was the worst part about church, the pews. I said, Where is it? You know, I thought we're gonna have to drive like 200 miles, you know,

00:31:09--> 00:31:37

never seen a mosque. He's like, it's all weird Hampton Boulevard. I'm like, man, not now. I know. You're playing with me. I live off within the boulevard. There's no masks and we're down the boulevard. He said, You know where the road intersects with the hands. And I said, Yes, I live on the road. Now. I really know you playing games to me. You just need to stop man, you know, with the foolishness. He said, you know, that missionary training facility on the corner? I said, Yep. used to take classes there to become a missionary. No masks. He's, uh, you know, that little brick building with the gold thing on top? And like, yep, the gym said, Nope, that's the mosque.

00:31:38--> 00:32:10

I will because they're in the same parking lot. I was like, Oh my God. I wasn't surprised. Like, oh my god. I was surprised like, Oh my god, these crazy Muslims live at the end of my street, man. You know, they live across the street from me. Crazy Arab Muslims. So I went home and I told my grandmother did you know those crazy Arab Muslims live down the street from us? You like yeah, I know that. I was like, why didn't you want me I used to go there late at night, man. They could have they could have already gotten me. Like those people are fine. Leave them alone. They don't bother anybody. And actually, the funniest thing was that their mosque burned down a few years ago. And

00:32:10--> 00:32:23

there was a box outside, you know, to treat build it. And when I was going into the missionary facility, since I thought that was part of the church. I was putting money in the box to build the mosque. Anyway, it's a whole nother ball of wax right there.

00:32:25--> 00:32:45

So I told her I was going on Friday today for Juma. She was like, okay, just be really careful. Not like, oh, now the dangerous. I'm going in now. Right? So I went on Friday and sat outside the church. I'm not just running up in the mosque, you know, I'm not no fool. I'm watching who's going in this mosque. And who goes in the mosque on Friday, Adams, Adams Adams as maybe some Pakistanis. But at that time, you all look the same to me.

00:32:46--> 00:32:55

You Africans, but no Americans step foot in the building. So I'm like, check one, all Muslims, the Arab except a few Africans

00:32:57--> 00:33:27

off the list. And now it's 120. And moose is not here. The guy who says Well, we call him he's not here. So I'm paging him. Cell phones were really ramping at that time. So I'm paging. I mean, he's not answering me. Come to find out later, he got locked up the same day. That's why he's not there. So the man pulls up in front of me and he gets out and he asked if he can help me. I told him Yeah, Musa invited me to Juma. And he was I didn't know he's the man, you know, some Egyptian guy, or some Arab guy can find his Egyptian man named Mohammed, who was the man. He said, Oh, yeah, we know mostly, this doesn't come that much. But you come in, we'll take care of you. So I brought me and

00:33:27--> 00:33:59

put me in the back. They put me in the back gave me a chair. So I'm sitting in this chair, looking at all these atoms in front of me. There's a curtain behind me. And there's women behind the curtain chattering now like why do they have to be around that curtain? I didn't even see them go in because they the interest around the back? I said, I bet you is because they have too many bruises from all the beatings. Nobody can be seen. They can't be seen. So that behind the curtain, and I'm looking at all these atoms and you know what starts to come into my mind? My, if any of you have kids, you know what I mean? My spider sense starts going off. Yeah, I have a four year old so I know Spider Man.

00:33:59--> 00:34:30

When Spider Man is around danger, he starts tingling. So to have a little tingling sensation, I started to get this tingling sensation that had been set up. And I started to think to myself, you know what, I've probably been set up because you've been set up before and it felt kind of like this. I said, I bet you this guy moose is working with these dudes here. Or he's been in the same situation and because Musa was not the most trustworthy of characters, believe me? Oh, he's been in the same situation and got himself out of it by saying that he would bring all the non Muslims easy can to the mosque and trick them to come into the mosque for Juma so they could do the low Jihad and

00:34:30--> 00:34:41

get the divergence in heaven. You know, I'm like, they're gonna drag me off out of here and kill me for sure. You know, this was not this is the South Carolina's the woodsman. You know, I mean, kkk start running around in this time people dragged in the woods and get killed all the time.

00:34:42--> 00:34:48

So I say to myself, you've been set up, you're gonna get killed today. And I mean, they're probably gonna try to do you in.

00:34:49--> 00:34:59

And then the Imam comes in. He gets on the minbar and I'm five minutes away. And I'm thinking to myself, you know, this Imam seem very soft spoken. I don't think he's gonna

00:35:00--> 00:35:17

I don't think he's gonna command everyone to kill me. And I don't I didn't see that coming out of his mouth. So he gets up on the mimbar. And what does he do with the pulpit? That's what I knew what is appropriate at that time when he gets up, and never hamdulillah no matter who, you know, who was the hero, who I'm like, Oh, my God, he's talking about me now.

00:35:19--> 00:35:29

Gonna get they're gonna get me for sure. This man is screaming in Arabic. He's pounding on this thing. He's pointing in my direction. I'm like, yep, that's it. I'm done.

00:35:31--> 00:35:36

And, you know, he's screaming, I'm freaking out figuring out how many old Arab guys I can knock out on the way out the door?

00:35:37--> 00:36:09

Or should I take my chance with the women? But I know and I, you know, I know from growing up that you don't want to take your chance with a group of women. And that might be where they keep the the weapons behind the curtain? Or can I go through the window, you know, I'm trying to figure out how to get out of here. But then the man Stop screaming at me in Arabic. And he starts to translate what he said that All praise belongs to God alone, who is the creator of all that exists, we praise Him, we seek His help we seek His forgiveness, you know how it goes in English. And I was like, wow, this is some of the most beautiful rhetoric I've ever heard, and the hood, but that day was about the

00:36:09--> 00:36:44

forgiveness of God, that the forgiveness of Allah subhana wa IRA is open to anyone at any time, at any place without discretion. And he said, there's only three ways I will not forget this clip been shot long. That's a lot of music from my memory. He said, there's three ways that you cannot be forgiven. He said number one, that your soul has reached your throat, meaning that death has come to you after that, no forgiveness. He said number two, if the sun has risen from the west, I had no idea what this man was talking about at that point. He said number three, the only way you cannot be forgiven is if you knowingly worship something else, other than the Creator. Other than that,

00:36:44--> 00:37:20

anything you can do you can think of God is able to forgive. And it was based on a story of jabril la cinammon Otto su sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, when when gibreel told Mohammed peace be upon him that detail the Muslims if they commit this certain sin, like they steal ALLAH forgive them. So he would tell the Muslims and the Muslims would ask him about another sin. And it would have to go back to gibreel jury would go back, come back and say okay, I'll figure that one, two. And this took place until finally, until finally jabril. And acnm came back from INSEAD. Tell the Muslims that our losses this, tell them that no matter what they have done, no matter how great the amount of sins

00:37:20--> 00:37:29

they have, are, that as long as they do not willingly associate a partner with Allah Subhana Allah, Allah forgive all of it. This was his code bar.

00:37:30--> 00:37:49

And I was like, wow, you know, this is amazing. I have never heard it laid out like this, but this is what I believe that God created me. He's going to make me die. He's going to resurrect me. He's going to question me Shouldn't he be the one to forgive me? Why do I need Jesus and and why do I need Buddha and why do I need Krishna and why do I need all these other things?

00:37:50--> 00:38:28

So after the the goodbye they lined up for salah and I asked them you know I looked I was like what they doing man you know they block in the hallway for me to get out. And I mean, they go on wall the wall and somebody came and said we're gonna pray. I was like, Okay, I want to see this type of prayer but to do so they heard the Quran didn't mean anything to me because I didn't understand it beautiful sound like a recitation. What caught my attention was when they bowed, and when they prostrated on the floor, versus in verses of many books that I had read rang in my head. This is how the prophets in the Bible pray this is our prophets prayed in many books of religion. I said that

00:38:28--> 00:39:05

and I knew one thing else also that they that this was not prayer, Salah is not prayer. So bad translation of the word. I said what they're doing is not praying. They're worshiping. This is worship. This is the bather This is worship to Allah soprano with Anna this sola is worship. This is our embeded to almost a kind of with Ireland. And I knew that it was worship. So I said to myself, you've written these people off off I'm just reading one book and hear these people are talking better than you've heard any religion speak and they're worshiping God in a way that you've never seen before. So I went to the Imam after the Salah, and you know, our, our, you know, the beliefs of

00:39:05--> 00:39:33

Islam are six in Pillars of Islam or five and I said, You know what? Not to be disrespectful, there's nothing you want to tell me that's gonna make me believe in your religion. I've probably heard it all. I was arrogant. So there's nothing you can tell me is gonna make me believe I said, I have one clue for you. Quick question for you. Do you have proof? Do you have proof that your religion is true? Do you have something you can place right here in my hands? To tell me that your religion is what you say it is. And he got a big smile on his face.

00:39:34--> 00:39:35

He said Come with me.

00:39:37--> 00:40:00

So I went into his office and he went on the shelf and pulled off a book and put it in my hands. You know, that book said on the front, the Holy Quran. He says this is our proof. And he explained to me what the Quran was about that it was revealed to Muhammad so once I said okay, if your book is what you say it is, it will say it for itself. So I took it home and started reading it. The first chapter looked like the Lord's Prayer to me from the Bible. When Jesus taught his disciples had to pray what caught my attention.

00:40:00--> 00:40:21

More than anything it made me want to read the book so badly was the second verse of the second chapter with this book is telling me and I had the noble with all the parentheses. That this is the book we're in is no doubt, no discrepancies, no contradictions, no errors. And it is a guidance for those who fear God. I was like, Oh, really?

00:40:22--> 00:40:33

Oh, really? This is a challenge. I said, Are you serious? This book is challenging me at the beginning in saying it has no discrepancies, no errors, no contradictions, and it's a guidance. I said, I found discrepancies in every book.

00:40:35--> 00:41:13

I'll find it in this book. So my initial reading of the Quran was to challenge it was to find the contradictions was to prove that verse wrong. So I started to read all of the Quran. And I noticed names that I had known all my life, I noticed Abraham, Moses, Noah, David, Jesus lot Zechariah, john the baptist, Mary, G, all of these names I knew. But there was a difference between these people in this book, they were prophets. They were messengers, they were guidance for humanity. They were the best of people. They were at the highest echelon of morality in the in this book, and I looked at these people, and I said, these are prophets. And all the questions I had about Jesus, were answered

00:41:13--> 00:41:15

in about three chapters of the Quran.

00:41:17--> 00:41:53

And I couldn't have put down the Quran in three days, I finished it in English. And three days, on Sunday night, I've closed the Quran, crying by myself in my room, the only thing I could say to myself was, this is the book that has no doubt in it. And it is a guidance for those who fear God. And I said, I want to be a Muslim whatever's in this book I want to be so I went to the Imam and I told him, I want to be a Muslim. He said, Are you sure? I'm not? Yeah. He said, You believe that there's no God, where the worship is said when God said yes, I've always believed that. I've just never been given it like this. And this book is what you say it is. He said, but you also have to

00:41:53--> 00:42:24

understand who is Mohammed? And he started to try to explain to me, Mohammed, and I said, I have one question for you, that will explain Mohammed, did he give us this book? He said, Yes, I said, then he the Prophet. This is his validity. This is his proof of Muhammad, who he was the greatest proof that it can exist for him. Because I know God is perfect. I know this book is perfect. Therefore, the in between the medium of the book, who is Muhammad is perfect. That's all I need to know, La ilaha illAllah Muhammad.

00:42:29--> 00:43:03

So I accepted Islam On this day in December of 1998. And I've been a Muslim ever since. And the reason I do what I do, and I'm going to close in two minutes, because I'm going to have to this brother five, to kill everybody between him for him to get me on time. But the reason I do what I do, and I tell my story is because I do not want any single human being on the face of the planet to have to go through what I went through to come to the truth that you have been born with. And this is the sad thing that a lot of us have been born with this beautiful light. And there are so many people right here in Lewisham, Kent, that don't know what you know, and they want to know, and they

00:43:03--> 00:43:11

need to know and it's for their betterment. But we keep it contained in our message, and we keep it contained in our home and we keep it contained in our hearts. And this is one of the greatest.

00:43:13--> 00:43:44

This is one of the greatest oppressions that we have done to humanity is deny them the truth. I don't want anyone else to have to suffer like I suffered. That's why I don't care if it cost me my life, traveling the world for the rest of my life. as many people as I can reach, they don't have to suffer anymore. That's what I'm going to do. Because I don't want anyone to go through what I went through because I could have, I could have been lost. When when Allah says in the Quran that you were really on the brink of the pit of the fire and we save you from I feel that I feel that very sincerely. And I don't want anyone else to suffer. And I'm going to finish with this statement that

00:43:44--> 00:44:18

this is us. This is us. Jesus is purported to have said in the New Testament, I don't care who said it's so profound that no one would bring a candle into their home and then place a bucket on top of it because then no one benefits from the light but they would bring the candle into the home so everyone can be of a benefit to the light. You brothers and sisters have the most beautiful light that exists. It is the light that allows us to kind of what that it gives to the Muslim and to the Muslim alone. And Allah soprano with Allah says he is the light of the heavens and the earth. It is the most beautiful light let me take it from someone who has been on the outside looking in and who

00:44:18--> 00:44:42

has caught a glimpse of that light. It is the most beautiful thing that exists on the face of the earth and it will draw people to itself more than a street light draws moss to it at nighttime. The only thing we need to do is remove the bucket that we have on top. Live our Islam openly never I slammed on the outside in the streets, in the markets in your work everywhere you go take Islam with you as the last