How to Stay Firm on the Straight Path

Yasmin Mogahed


Channel: Yasmin Mogahed

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Salam Alaikum

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How's everyone?

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Good? Not that good.

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I would have let him in a shaytani r rajim Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim salatu salam ala rasulillah while earlier savage mine, abstractly Saudi Arabia siddalee Omri wahala. locked them in lasagna, oh, holy.

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It's an honor to be back here in your beautiful city. Mashallah. It was a beautiful montage that you made. And I appreciate coming to the city, it's, I think it's time the left for the last few years, I've had the opportunity to come and visit your city. It's, it's a lot, you know, it's relaxing, it's different than kale, and hamdulillah. I love I love to come here and to visit your community.

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I, I want to begin the way that I have been beginning all of my classes. And that's by asking everyone here to take an active part in your own learning. So what do I mean by that, I mean that.

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In order for you to attain something, in order for you to get to a destination, you need to be very clear on what the destination is. And so what I want to ask everyone to do is to within your own heart, just set an intention of what you came to receive what you want or need in your life and what you home to take hope to take home with you

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set a goal and set an intention.

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Everyone understand. The second part of my request is that I want to ask you to make a dua that Allah subhanaw taala give you that what you came to see, and for a lot to give everyone who came here what they came to see, and for lots of Baraka blessing in our time together. Can you guys take a few moments and do that? Please?

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Raise your hand. If you are give me a thumbs up if you're good on both requests. If you've done it.

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does some other people need more time?

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You're good. Okay.

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Is there anyone who cares to share anything about what they hope to gain or take home with them?

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You don't have to.

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Don't be shy.

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If it's personal, that's fine. Does anyone want to share?

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Yes, stir up in the front. She's up in the front.

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Salaam Alaikum. Everyone alaikum Salaam. I would like to understand truly the meaning of St. Karma. Okay, so she wants to understand the true meaning of his karma. All right.

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Male is planet that allow us to do that. Anyone else?

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Okay, okay. Bismillah. So I'm going to begin by talking about the concept of is the comma. And then I want to move into the practical aspects of how can we have is the comma first of all, what is this the comma is the comma, you're stuck him is stuck him, it means to stay firm.

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So it's the comma is for example, when a loss of data in the end says he doesn't just tell us to pray. He says

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he harm his salon or a pimple assala. What does that means he's telling us to be firm in salon or to establish the salon firmly. So it's the karma is to establish something firmly or to be solid in something to be firm in it.

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Another example to give you sort of an illustration from the physical world of karma, is if you look at a solid tree,

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a solid tree has its diploma because it stands firm and solid even when the wind blows. Even if a storm hits. It stays

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For now, the question is, how can we be like that? Right? And that's the question the sister was saying she wants to learn how, or she wants to learn. What is that? And how do we seek that? So how do we have the ability to have what you know there's different terms for it in English. Resilience is one of the words, grit, some people use the word grit. So it's the ability to stand firm, it's the ability to be consistent.

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Now, of course, in the context of our Dean, it's talking about being firm in our, in our Eman, being firm in our worship being consistent and solid. In our worship and our belief, Allah subhanaw taala tells us there's two parts

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and levena Avenue. What anyone, I mean, who solly hats, when Allah subhanaw taala talks about Amen. He couples it with Aman, right? He couples it with action. So we know that there's two parts of what we're supposed to be doing. There is the inner part.

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And then there's the outer part. What's the inner part, the belief, the Amen. Another way that this is referred to is the a battle of the heart.

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There's a battle for the heart, there's a worship for the heart. There's also a battle for the limbs for the body. For the tongue, there's a worship for the ears for the eyes. So there are these there are the internal a Baghdad the internal part. And then there's the external part. The internal part has to do with our belief, our Amen. How we think of Allah subhana wa tada how we view Allah subhana wa Taala how we respond internally with the things that we face in life. That's internal,

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our certainty or doubt, right, certainty is yaqeen.

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Doubt is check. So these are all things that are internal. And then there's the external part, which is our worship, externally prayer, reading quotes, guarding our ears, guarding our eyes, all of that is the external type of very bad. Now, in order for us to have his diploma, we have to have a stick comma internally and we have to have the comma externally

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and they're connected to each other. The Prophet sallallahu Sallam said it in Nashville, Jessa de moda. Indeed, in the body, there's a there's a lump of flesh,

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either solo hat sort of hell just to do kulu. If it's set right, then the entire body will be set, right? What either faster that

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faster than just Sudoku that any fit is corrupted, then the entire body will be corrupted. Allah heal. Indeed, it's the heart.

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So what are we learning from this headache? We're learning that the master of the body isn't actually the mind. That sounds a little strange, because many people try to say no, my mind is in control over my heart. Right? You hear this a lot. My mind controls my heart.

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Well, I have, I guess a newsflash for you. It's actually your heart that controls your mind.

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What do I mean by that? The type of heart that you have, will control your thoughts, your mind, your actions, the type of heart you have. And so the mind actually becomes a slave to the heart. That's interesting, that you will think of ways

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you will become the mind becomes a slave to whatever the heart is.

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So for example, if the hardest corrupted,

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the mind will

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think of ways to do corrupt things. And that's because the heart is corrupted.

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The mind becomes a tool and a slave to whatever is in the heart. So the prophets, I send them a saying that if you take care of that lump of flesh, which is the heart that everyone clear that when I say the heart, I'm not talking about the physical heart, I'm talking about the spiritual heart, the can the can, so if that heart is purified, then the rest of the body will be purified. See, either solo head, if it is set right, then the entire body will be set right?

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What does it mean when the prophets lie Selim says the entire body will be set right?

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It means our actions will be set right? When you when you purify the heart, when you take care of the heart, when you feed the heart,

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when you rectify the heart, then your actions follow.

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And when the heart is corrupted, when the heart is starved, when the heart is not taken care of when the heart is deprived of oxygen, then the rest of the actions will also be corrupted. I shuttled the line her said in a sahadi

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that if the first verses to be revealed, were do not drink alcohol, or do not commit fornication had on relationship.

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The people would have said we will never give up alcohol and we will never give up fornication or how to relationship.

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But the first verses to be revealed were not about the rules of heroin and heroin. In that way. They were not about do not drink alcohol and do not commit fornication, the first verses to be revealed. If you study the Quran, and you look at the verses that were revealed in the beginning of the of the mission of Mohammed Salah Salem, and you compare it to the verses that were revealed in the second half there, they're generally different. The meccan areas, the areas that were revealed in Mecca, are different than the areas that were revealed in Medina, in theme, the theme is, is generally very different. What is the theme of the acts that are revealed in Mecca? It's all about building that

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taqwa of Allah subhanaw taala building an attachment with Allah subhanho wa Taala the Day of Judgment, learning that we will be asked that we're not just living in this life without a purpose, that there is a purpose about Allah is oneness about the Day of Judgment, about retribution, about life after death, about what Allah subhanaw taala is and so that we can love and fear him

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that those are yet we're building a foundation.

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This is the foundation of is the karma. There has to be see if you go back to that solid tree.

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Allah subhanaw taala says and sort of the Brahim when he gives an example of a good word is like a good tree. How does he describe this, this good tree also has a fair bit what for over half a century, its foundation is solid sabot it's solid, and then its branches goes towards the sky. See you can become you can become elevated you can go you can grow, you can get higher, but only if you have solid roots. Does that make sense? The the taller a tree gets the deeper its roots have to go.

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If you study the way Allah has designed a tree, you'll find that this the taller it is the more deeply and more wide the roots have to be in the ground.

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And the more solid the foundation has to be even mountains have foundation. And the taller it is the more it has to have that foundation.

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Everything in order to be solid and have and to be firm and to have is Tahoma has to have a solid foundation.

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And so Allah subhanaw taala is telling us even in the training that he gives us and the training he gave the companions it didn't start out with rules. It started out with building our foundation with a loss of habitat.

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So what is what happens now, once you have a foundation with Allah subhanaw taala you know that you will be asked you have love and fear for almost upon odana you you have Taqwa you build your telecoil in Allah subhanaw taala you trust in Allah subhanaw taala. Now, when Allah tests you, or Allah make gives a commandment, then you can have is the hammer. Why? Because you have a solid foundation. Go back to the example of the tree.

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When the wind blows,

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if the tree is solid, what happens to the tree?

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Well, it's leaves you you know, the leaves might move the branches might move, but the tree stays standing right? It's solid. But what happens to a tree that doesn't

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have deep roots,

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while the wind can knock it over. Let me tell you what happens to human beings. When a human being is raised in such a way that they don't have solid roots with Allah, I give you guys an example.

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There's a certain method of raising people in Islam. And that method is what we might refer to as the rule, shaming method, the rule oriented slash shaming method, let me explain what I mean. This is the method where

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you as a as a kid growing up, the only thing you really learn about is how long

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and how fire and you know, you go to school, you come home, the only words that that these children might learn is how long, how long, how long. This is, how long this is, how long, how long, that's how long

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your existence is, how long.

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And then, and then it's like, if you do how long you will go to hellfire.

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Right, children are being taught that that's what children are being taught. That's how they're being taught. Why are children being taught that? Well, it is true, there are things that are wrong. And it is true that Hellfire is real. And it is true that Allah subhanaw taala has has anger and wrath, this is all true. But why are they being taught that above his mercy?

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Why are we not teaching our children that allows the Most Merciful and that even if you make a mistake, you can repent? And you can try again? Why is this not the message that we're being taught? And the answer Unfortunately,

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sometimes is because this is to control the behavior of the child. And the idea the wrong idea is that you use fear to control

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but it backfires.

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Do you know how it backfires? I'll tell you how it backfires. When you're using

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false fear or false shame, unhealthy shame

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to control someone's behavior. You're not building solid roots.

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You're just building avoidance.

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Let me give you an example.

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Imagine that you grew up in a household where you're always being told to you better watch out or the police is going to put you in jail. You better not make a mistake, you better not do this. You better basically you're you're taught to be afraid of the police. Why? Because the police is made out to be this very wrathful scary entity. Okay. And every single day you're told and as you grow and as you grow, you're you're being told Watch yourself to see those police. They're not they're out to get you, they're gonna get you see that jail over there. They're gonna throw you in there, you better not make a mistake. Fine. You might avoid the police. But are you going to want to be

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close to the police?

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Are you going to want to be best friends with the police? Are you going to confide your problems to the police? Are you going to ask the police for help when you're in trouble?

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And the answer is no. Because you don't trust the police. And you've been told that the police is just going to punish you. You guys understanding what I'm saying? So what's happening is this method is not building a step comma in in our, in our youth and in our in ourselves. It's building avoided so many people raised like this. They grow up and they don't want to have anything to do with Allah subhanaw taala they actually want to avoid a lot and religion.

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Why? Because they say you know what? Everything is everything is wrong. And no matter what I do, I'm gonna go to hell anyway weird things like that they think everything I do is wrong. So what's the point in trying?

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Oh, you know, I if I make any small mistake, Allah is going to punish me so I should just avoid this whole Allah thing. I should just avoid this whole religion thing. You see what's happened is it's backfired. Why? Because you're building without any solid foundation.

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You're trying to build on top of, you know the ground but you have no foundation. You know, when you build when you when you make a building, like like the one we're in right now. You have to make foundation. If you don't build the foundation first. That building

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will not survive.

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And especially in places where there's earthquakes. Let me give you an example, Japan,

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there's earthquakes there. And so they build their, their, their, their structures in such a way to be able to withstand the shaking of an earthquake. There's a specific type of foundation that they have to make, so that if the earth shakes, it doesn't destroy the building.

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This is what we have to do, psychologically and spiritually, we have to have a certain type of foundation, so that what life hits us what life throws at us, right? Sometimes we're going to be shaken in life.

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Like an earthquake.

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Allah subhanaw taala says in the Quran is a symptom and that whole agenda well Am I methodology, no calm and publikum do you think that you will enter Paradise

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without going through that which those who came before you went

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masetto will best sell or the raw was Zuzu they went through calamity adversity struggle. And they were shaking Zulu, the word zillo in in Arabic is from the same root as the word xizang in Arabic, which means earthquake.

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So they're shaken like an earthquake, that they were shaken so much in their lives and they were tested,

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was zero had that now watch this head, the hula, Rasulullah levena, M and Mau, maternal through law. They're so shaken like an earthquake, until even the messengers and those with the messengers, asked metachronous Roma.

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When will the help of Allah come?

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And Allah Subhana Allah says Allah in Allah so Allah Karim, indeed the help of Allah is near of the help of Allah isn't just there isn't just existing, it's near. Allah subhanaw taala isn't just there, he doesn't just exist, he is near when not operable, even hablan worried. Allah says that we that he is closer to us than our jugular vein. So realize that Allah is near Allah is not just there he's near. But we're going to be shaken sometimes. And so how does a building withstand an earthquake? And the answer all goes back to the type of foundation that is the karma, what type of foundation do you have with Allah subhanaw taala. So that when you are tested, and you will be

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tested, and you will be tested with various things.

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When you are tested, are you able to withstand that test?

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So I should have the Adhan is saying

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that the first versus didn't say, Give up alcohol, give up fornication Zina, because people would have said, we'll never give up these things, if it started with that. Why? Because they had not yet built a foundation. They had not yet built the roots of the tree. They were not there was no roots yet. So if you come to a person from the very beginning, and you give them rules, they're not going to follow the rules if it goes against what they want, if they have no foundation.

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And that's the mistake many of us are making.

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So going back to the example of how many of us are being raised and how we're raising our children, we're not building a foundation, but we're throwing rules.

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We're not talking about building an attachment to Allah, love of Allah. What does it really mean to put our reliance on a law? Where is that being taught to children?

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The only thing being taught to children is it's haram to eat this, it's haram to drink this. It's haram to dress like this. It's haram to say this, it's hard to do this. That's it.

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And the problem with that method is it's being rejected, just as I showed one has said, Isn't that what she's saying? She said if you start off with the rules, if Allah had started off with the rules, even with the companions, they would have rejected the rules.

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But it did not start off with the rules a lot did not start with the rules. If you study give you an example just ama

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just as Omar is basically meccan

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it's basically Mexican versus

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and if you look at Susanna, is it about rules is there in rosamma?

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Not really, all of us. admah is about the day of judgment about a law, human

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beings relationship with Allah.

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human psychology, taqwa

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retribution, Jenna Johanna, you know how we treat one another. That's what's Hinduism. Because that was the foundation building. If you want is to karma, you have to build a foundation in the love of Allah. You have to build a foundation in the, the proper taqwa. And in tawakkol in Allah subhanaw taala. You have to have trust, you have to build a foundation of trust and reliance on Allah subhanaw taala.

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Now, I want to take a moment and go back to a point that I was making,

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about why this is being rejected the way in which we are using shame and fear. Now you hear fear, and you see, but isn't that a good thing? Isn't that? What's wrong with fear?

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I'm going to tell you there is healthy fear. And there is unhealthy fear. Okay, there is healthy fear. And there's unhealthy fear. Let me give you an example.

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You know, when you do something really, really bad.

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And you're really scared of your parents?

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And if you're really, really scared,

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sometimes what do you do? Do you run to the parents? Or do you run away from the parent?

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You run away and hide, right?

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So there's basically two ways to respond when you hurt someone or you make a mistake.

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Imagine that you hurt

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your close friend or a spouse.

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You know, there's some people who feel so bad about it so shameful. They should they feel ashamed. That what do they do? They hide they try to avoid the person. They try to hide from the issue. They distance themselves from the person.

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Is that a healthy way to deal with it? Does that solve the problem? Or does it make it worse? Anyone? It makes it worse.

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This is what some of us do with Allah.

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That when we feel like we've made a mistake, and we feel ashamed. So instead of going to Allah, we run away from Allah, we try to hide from Allah. We don't want to go pray because we feel ashamed. Or we want to we don't want to talk about Allah. Or maybe we want to leave religion completely because we feel ashamed.

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But what's a healthier way to deal with that? When you've hurt someone, what's the healthiest way to fix it?

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To go to the person and to apologize to go to the person and say, I'm sorry, I regret it, I admit, and I'm going to try to do better. That is his default and sober. That's what we're supposed to do that healthy fear. That's a healthy response when you make a mistake, is that instead of trying to hide from Allah, I want nothing to do with religion. I want nothing to do with God. I'm not even going to. I'm not going to pray. Because I've committed so many sins I feel too ashamed to face Allah. That's an unhealthy type of shame.

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But the healthy fear is called taqwa.

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The Healthy fear is called taqwa. And taqwa will make you try to stay away from what angers Allah. And if you do what angers a lot, you rush to apologize.

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You rush to repent,

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to to to show your regret, and to try to make it better.

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Now, why am I mentioning this because I think that what's happening is we are feeding the wrong kind of fear and shame. Because when you teach about a law, like a scary policeman, with a villa, you're encouraging your children to actually avoid Allah not run to Allah and apologize, not run to Allah and be closer to Allah. We're uh, we're actually encouraging people to try to avoid a law and religion completely and the dean.

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So healthy fear will motivate us to get closer to Allah and repent.

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unhealthy shame

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will make us run away from almost peloton and avoid him

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out of shame.

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So in order for us to have this ability to be firm in our Deen to

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have his department.

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We have to have healthy fear of Allah subhanaw taala called taqwa healthy fear is taqwa. Now, how do we build healthy fear?

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You know what the, you know?

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You know what the seed of healthy taqwa is this interesting. Let me put it this way. Let me back up.

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There is a seed to unhealthy shame. You know, a seed grows into a tree, right? But it all starts at the seed level, right? So if you want to address something, go look at the root, and then find the seed. Uh huh. Yeah.

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So if you look at the seed of unhealthy shame, you know what it is?

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It's thinking that you're supposed to be perfect.

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That's actually counterintuitive. Like, it's deep.

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It's the myth of perfection.

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It's when you are taught, or you believe that you're actually supposed to be perfect. If you believe that, then you will. You will react with unhealthy shame when you make a mistake.

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Why? Because you feel like I was supposed to be perfect. And I'm not perfect. And I am so ashamed of myself. I'm not even going to try anymore.

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It leads you into despair. But what was the root cause? What's the seed of it? That you thought you were supposed to be perfect? Or maybe that's what you were taught. Maybe that's what you were taught by your, by your, by your family by your culture.

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Now let's go to the root or the seed of healthy taqwa.

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And, and healthiest for repentance, and healthy Toba going back to Allah. Do you know what the root is? Do you know what the seed is?

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Knowing that all human beings will make mistakes?

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It's the opposite.

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It's realizing

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that the human being is imperfect.

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And that's the creation of Allah. When you know that, then you will respond with repentance because you know, you know, I'm human, I've messed up again, I'm going to I'm going to try to fix it.

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I'm going to try to I'm going to try again, I'm going to repent.

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The Prophet sallallahu Sallam said that all the children of Adam will make mistakes,

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and who are the best of them?

00:32:57--> 00:32:58

those who repent.

00:33:00--> 00:33:10

We have to let go of the myth of perfection. Because it is the root cause of so many of our problems.

00:33:11--> 00:33:15

It is the reason why we actually fall into despair.

00:33:17--> 00:33:42

Because if you're told you're supposed to be perfect, and you end up realizing that you're not perfect because you're human, and you will never be perfect because it's not the design. How can you go against the divine design? Tell me how can anyone go against the divine design? A law said that he created human beings imperfect.

00:33:44--> 00:33:45

So how can you go against that?

00:33:47--> 00:33:50

Think about it. It's impossible.

00:33:53--> 00:33:58

This is the creation of Allah subhanaw taala. So when you try to go against that you will end up

00:33:59--> 00:34:00

hitting with despair.

00:34:04--> 00:34:05

Allah tells us

00:34:07--> 00:34:35

clearly a bad levena Ostroff, wala and fusa him latter cannot human Rahmatullah. say Oh, my servants who have wronged your own selves. When we commit sin, we aren't hurting a lot. We're hurting ourselves. We don't we don't wrong a lot. We don't take away from Allah. Allah His kingdom is, is infinite. He's rich, but we hurt ourselves. You know, it's like if you drink poison, are you hurting yourself for the doctor?

00:34:36--> 00:34:59

If you refuse to take your medicine, are you hurting yourself for the doctor? yourself? Right? If you if you decide to stop breathing, it's you who's who's getting hurt, not the doctor. So realize that Allah subhanaw taala isn't the one who were wrong. It's ourselves that we're wrong when we sin. So Allah says gulia Abadi all my slave.

00:35:00--> 00:35:03

who have wronged who have transgressed against their own selves?

00:35:05--> 00:35:10

Let's talk about human Rahmatullah. Don't despair, of the mercy of Allah.

00:35:13--> 00:35:24

Allah is telling us not to despair, but many of us, we despair because we have the wrong concept of ourselves and the wrong concept of Allah.

00:35:27--> 00:35:32

When we think of ourselves, we think I'm supposed to be perfect, I better be perfect.

00:35:33--> 00:35:48

And if I'm not perfect, then I'm worthless. You know, you know what all or none is? Yeah, you're either you either have to be an angel, otherwise, you're a devil. Right? It's just, it's black and white, we have to stop that.

00:35:49--> 00:35:55

Benny Adam is not one or the other. Benny Adam is not an angel.

00:35:57--> 00:36:01

And Benny Adam, hopefully, is not a devil.

00:36:03--> 00:36:13

A believer, a believer is someone who is flawed, but continues to repent and to try hard to get it right.

00:36:14--> 00:36:32

Who gets back up after they fall. So the prophet SAW Selim said that all the children of Adam will make mistakes, but the best are those who repent. Letting go of this false sense of perfection will allow us the ability to get back up when we fall.

00:36:37--> 00:36:39

And you want to hear something else that's really counterintuitive.

00:36:40--> 00:36:50

Siobhan feeds off of this false sense of perfection. He uses it as a weapon against

00:36:51--> 00:36:52

Can I tell you how,

00:36:54--> 00:37:12

when you make a mistake, or I make a mistake, he will come to us and he'll say, Look at you. How shameful is you? You're gonna go pray now, after you did this, when you're such a terrible person, you're just a hypocrite.

00:37:15--> 00:37:16

Look at you.

00:37:17--> 00:37:22

How shameful is you? You're gonna keep wearing your hijab. While you're such a bad person.

00:37:24--> 00:37:27

You should just take it off. Stop being a hypocrite.

00:37:28--> 00:37:29

Does any of this sound familiar?

00:37:31--> 00:37:38

This is how shaitan uses this tool of false perfection.

00:37:40--> 00:37:52

If a person knew that they are not perfect, and they were never created to be perfect, then when shaytaan comes at you that way, you say yes, I know I made a mistake, but Allah is the Most Merciful.

00:37:54--> 00:37:59

That's what Allah wants us to have is hope. In his mercy.

00:38:00--> 00:38:16

Allah subhanaw taala says that if someone goes to Allah with sins, that that go that fill the area between the heavens and the earth, do you know how much that is? Think about it. The area between the earth and the sky filled with sins?

00:38:18--> 00:38:20

Who has that many sins? That's a lot of sins.

00:38:22--> 00:38:26

No one else is really excited about how many sins that is. She is okay.

00:38:27--> 00:38:27


00:38:29--> 00:38:46

That's a lot. And you know what Allah says? He says a few. If anyone comes to him with sins, filling the heavens and earth, like the area between the heavens and earth, and they sincerely repent to Allah, Allah will give them forgiveness as big or more.

00:38:48--> 00:38:54

See, that's who Allah is. Allah isn't a policeman who's waiting to throw you in jail.

00:38:56--> 00:38:57

Allah is the Most Merciful.

00:38:59--> 00:39:04

And the problem is that we're not teaching his mercy. We're just teaching his wrath.

00:39:05--> 00:39:15

We're not teaching the attachment to a lot. We're just teaching rules. We're not talking about the roots. Were just fighting over the leaves.

00:39:18--> 00:39:34

You know, well, you have to put on you know, the dress has to be like this. This is allowed. This is not allowed. Which ingredients in the Hillel food are really helpful, and which are like, not really Helen, but they're really Helen. Like,

00:39:36--> 00:39:40

I've actually seen a bottle of water that says Hillel certified on it.

00:39:41--> 00:39:42

It was water.

00:39:43--> 00:39:45

Like it's Hillel guy who's

00:39:46--> 00:39:50

Helen water water. This is like

00:39:52--> 00:40:00

this is missing the forest for the trees. This is missing the forest for a leaf on the trees. We

00:40:00--> 00:40:17

Are we are focusing on the roots. And you know what I've seen happen? I've seen children raised as a half of Masha Allah. They were raised in the madrasa. They were raised to recite Quran, they were raised to memorize Quran.

00:40:18--> 00:40:20

But the moment that they're tested,

00:40:22--> 00:40:46

they get knocked down. Why do you think that happens? And you know what I'm talking about? I think you know what I'm talking about? Why do you think that phenomenon happens with someone who was raised with the show? The show, right, they dressed a certain way, their parents dressed them a certain way. They were in the mud dress. Alhamdulillah very important. They learned the core, and maybe they memorize the entire quarter end.

00:40:47--> 00:40:49

But they didn't get deep.

00:40:50--> 00:40:59

It was the shell. They put on the the garments, they put on the clothes, they could recite it. But was it deep?

00:41:00--> 00:41:05

And if it wasn't deep, the moment they're tested, they fall over.

00:41:06--> 00:41:13

And sometimes that's a phenomenon we don't understand. How could this happen? But he was a half, she was a halfen.

00:41:15--> 00:41:21

How could this happen? You know why it happens? Because if the N is only on the tongue,

00:41:23--> 00:41:26

if the taqwa is only in the dress,

00:41:27--> 00:41:34

you're not going to have solid, deep roots, and the first wind that you face in your life, you're going to be swept away.

00:41:36--> 00:41:42

And it's not going to be enough that you wore the outer, you know, the outer, the outer costume,

00:41:43--> 00:41:45

the costume will be enough.

00:41:46--> 00:42:20

And I don't belittle the importance of the outer worship, by the way, because it is part of our deed, the outer worship and the inner worship, I began with that it's both and levina Avenue. What I mean slowly had it has to be both those who believe and righteous deeds, you cannot do one and not the other. But the problem is many of us are focusing only on the outer. And if you focus only on the outer, it's like growing a tree or building a structure and you don't have foundation and you don't have roots.

00:42:21--> 00:42:27

When wind comes, it knocks it down when an earthquake comes, it knocks down that building.

00:42:28--> 00:42:33

We have to have solid roots. So how do we build those solid roots practically?

00:42:35--> 00:42:41

First, I told you, we have to remove the myth of human perfection.

00:42:43--> 00:42:52

We have to set a different understanding that the human being wasn't created to be perfect. The human being was created to keep repenting

00:42:53--> 00:42:54

and keep trying again.

00:42:56--> 00:43:05

Can you imagine if a child learning to walk the first time the child falls, just stops trying to walk?

00:43:06--> 00:43:13

just sits there. And that's the end of walking. Right? The person will never walk.

00:43:14--> 00:43:21

Can you imagine a person driving and the moment they make a wrong turn? They just turn off the car and park it and they stopped driving.

00:43:22--> 00:43:31

I'm done. That's it. I made a wrong turn. Imagine the GPS says you made a wrong turn. Just stop trying turn off the car. Your trip is over.

00:43:32--> 00:43:36

Stop trying to get to your destination you made a wrong turn. Turn off the car.

00:43:38--> 00:43:44

Right. The GPS says something different. What does the GPS say? recalibrate recalculating

00:43:46--> 00:43:47


00:43:49--> 00:43:51

What is that? That's Toba?

00:43:54--> 00:44:09

That's actually Toba. Literally, it's tell about why because Toba means to return. So it's when the GPS is telling you made a wrong turn. So turn around, I'm going to reroute you. That's the process of his default until,

00:44:10--> 00:44:15

until but in the Arabic language literally means to turn around and return.

00:44:17--> 00:44:19

We have to be able to do this.

00:44:20--> 00:44:25

If we stop the car, every time we make a wrong turn, we won't get anywhere.

00:44:27--> 00:44:32

If we stopped trying to walk every time we fell, when we were children, we would never walk.

00:44:33--> 00:44:36

So we have to be able to get back up

00:44:37--> 00:44:41

to repent and to keep going and try again.

00:44:43--> 00:44:50

That's the first thing for is the karma. You know, if you told yourself, I'm never going to leave the house unless it's perfect weather.

00:44:52--> 00:44:53

There can't be any haze.

00:44:56--> 00:44:59

There can't be any rain. And there can't be any humidity.

00:45:00--> 00:45:02

In Malaysia, so basically you will never leave your house.

00:45:04--> 00:45:04


00:45:06--> 00:45:17

You have to have the ability to keep going even when conditions aren't perfect. Right? How can you have that? How can you build that?

00:45:18--> 00:45:32

I'll tell you what you have to do to build that inshallah, we have to take care of our hearts. And we have to do the internal a bad and the external a better. I'll tell you just a prescription quickly

00:45:33--> 00:45:34

of how to do that.

00:45:36--> 00:45:44

three parts to this prescription. The first is your Salah, Salah is like oxygen of the heart.

00:45:46--> 00:45:54

It's the first thing you'll you'll be asked about on the Day of Judgment. And it's keeping you alive spiritually and psychologically.

00:45:57--> 00:45:57

and mentally.

00:45:59--> 00:46:03

Number two, I advise you to download an app called my da.

00:46:04--> 00:46:26

It's spelled ny DUA. And this is fortress of a Muslim. In an app, I advise you to do your morning supplications, your evening supplications and the supplications before you sleep, it doesn't have to be all or none. You don't have to do every single one. But pick a collection that you can do regularly. consistency is key.

00:46:28--> 00:46:35

consistency is key, even if it's small, even if it's a tiny amount, but be consistent and you will see results.

00:46:37--> 00:46:42

Number three is the core and the words of Allah, the Book of Allah, you have to stay connected to it daily.

00:46:44--> 00:46:49

And don't just read it but understand what you're reading and apply it in your life.

00:46:52--> 00:46:55

be connected to the Sunnah of the Prophet, so I sent him

00:46:58--> 00:46:59

I told you three things.

00:47:01--> 00:47:03

These things will keep you

00:47:05--> 00:47:21

solid, will help you build solid roots so that when life sense, earthquakes and life sense rain, and life sense wind, it doesn't destroy you. But it's very, very important that we are consistent.

00:47:22--> 00:47:32

And make sure that you're talking to Allah subhanaw taala that you're building a relationship with Allah when you read your Escalade understand what you're saying.

00:47:34--> 00:47:56

When you're reading Quran, understand what Allah is saying, when you're saying your Salah, understand what you're saying, even if Arabic is not your first language, learn what you're saying in the Salah, you can do that. Anyone can do that. Learn the parts of the Salah. Why am I saying Subhana? Allah? And why am I saying send me aulani man hamidah

00:47:58--> 00:48:03

why when I put my head to the lowest, I am praising Allah the highest.

00:48:06--> 00:48:13

Right? learn why you're saying these things. And that's how you build a stronger foundation with Allah subhanho wa Taala.

00:48:14--> 00:48:17

And finally, I want to just highlight one part.

00:48:19--> 00:48:23

These three steps will keep your heart alive.

00:48:24--> 00:48:29

We'll build that solid foundation, the roots.

00:48:30--> 00:48:38

But we don't only want to keep our heart alive. We also have to keep our heart clean.

00:48:39--> 00:48:59

And we also have to keep our heart protected. So I want you guys to think about the heart like you think about the body. All right. In order to have a healthy life, you have to have a body that is fed a body that has oxygen, a body that has healthy food, right water.

00:49:01--> 00:49:04

But what if you're eating healthy, you're breathing. But

00:49:06--> 00:49:07

you don't ever take a shower.

00:49:09--> 00:49:13

What if you're, you know, you say you know what, I don't need to take a shower, because I did that last time. Hold on.

00:49:15--> 00:49:36

It's okay, I'm fine. Well, you're not going to be fine. And no one's going to want to sit next to you. And you're going to probably get very sick. Why? Because you have to keep cleaning the body. It's not enough to feed the body. It's not enough to breathe, but you have to maintain the cleanliness of the body, right? The heart is the same way the heart has to be cleaned.

00:49:37--> 00:49:39

How do we clean the heart You think?

00:49:40--> 00:49:52

repentance is the heart. So part of our daily of God needs to be as default needs to be repentance. Think of that as like the shower for the heart.

00:49:53--> 00:49:59

And then finally, imagine that you're breathing fine, you're eating fine. You're taking a shower

00:50:00--> 00:50:13

But after you take a shower, you go and roll around in the in the dirt. You don't like it like a kid you get you gotta get them all clean. You know, you put pretty bowls on her hair and pretty dress. And then right after that she goes, and she plays in the mud.

00:50:14--> 00:50:26

What's gonna happen? You're gonna get dirty again, right? So part of the process of taking care of the heart is not just oxygen, food, and cleaning but protection.

00:50:27--> 00:50:28

It's guarding the heart.

00:50:30--> 00:50:38

How do we guard the heart? Well, here's how we guard the heart, through the openings to the heart. What are the openings to the heart, the eyes?

00:50:40--> 00:50:42

The ears, the tongue?

00:50:44--> 00:50:45

The eyes, the ears and the tongue?

00:50:46--> 00:50:53

Those are the openings to the heart. Think of the heart like your sanctuary, like your home?

00:50:54--> 00:51:08

Do you keep your windows and doors open at night? Or do you close them? Close them, you lock them in, maybe you have a security system and offense. And depending where you are in the world, there's some places in the world. Everyone has an electric fence like South Africa.

00:51:10--> 00:51:37

So what is that that's for protection? Right? So your heart, think of your heart, like your sanctuary, your home, you have to guard it, you have to protect it, you have to keep the doors closed. When you are not guarding your eyes, when you're not conscious of what you're looking at. It's like leaving your doors open at night. And now the robber comes in. And he steals everything and he destroys your home. Whose fault is it?

00:51:40--> 00:51:43

Whose fault is it yours because you left the door open.

00:51:44--> 00:51:46

This is what we're doing by the way right now

00:51:48--> 00:51:57

is we have completely abandoned the idea the concept of huddled bustle of lowering and guarding the eyes.

00:51:58--> 00:52:01

And especially with now the social media culture,

00:52:03--> 00:52:10

we have become so lacks, we don't even think twice about what we're looking at.

00:52:12--> 00:52:37

And I'm talking the whole spectrum, all the way from checking someone out on their profile pictures, to their Instagram photos, all the way to pornography. And there's a big spectrum in between, but we're not guarding our eyes. And when you're looking at someone of the opposite gender, or you're looking at something that you're not supposed to be looking at, you are pouring poison into your own heart.

00:52:39--> 00:52:44

That is not protecting the heart that is poisoning the heart. It's putting black spots on the heart.

00:52:46--> 00:52:49

And then it puts black spots on the rest of your life.

00:52:51--> 00:52:53

It will affect your relationships.

00:52:54--> 00:52:56

If you're looking at the opposite gender,

00:52:57--> 00:53:30

as you shouldn't be looking guess what's happening. They're in the unseen, I'll tell you what's happening in the unseen shaitan works with that glance, and then beautifies what you're looking at, in a way that it doesn't actually look. Alright, so shaitan will deceive you to make you believe that what you're looking at is more beautiful than it is or more attractive than it is. So now all of a sudden this thing that isn't highlighted for you looks better than what is helpful for you, you understand what I'm saying?

00:53:31--> 00:53:57

So now this thing that is not highlighted for you that you're looking at, you weren't supposed to be looking at looks more attractive than your spouse. That's how shaitan works. But why did that happen? Because you weren't guarding your eyes. And so you opened yourself up to that. And so it puts this black spot not only in your heart, but in your relationships, you lose the Baraka, you lose the blessing, you lose the protection, and it's all about the eyes.

00:53:58--> 00:54:10

And like I said, this goes from all the way from looking at maybe someone who's completely wearing Hijab everything but you're staring at them. Maybe you're staring at their their photos online.

00:54:12--> 00:54:15

You're not supposed to be doing that. That's not guarding the eyes.

00:54:17--> 00:54:27

That's not what the buzzer got the buzzer the loss of panatela commanded it in the core and to men individually and then to women individually. That's how important it was.

00:54:29--> 00:54:53

So guarding your eyes and I said that's the that's one side of the spectrum or Annette and all the way to pornography and everything in between what we're seeing on the screens, what we're seeing on billboards, what we're seeing on our phone, what we're seeing on our tablets we're seeing on our social media, or we're seeing on the internet, have we stopped guarding our eyes. That is one of the biggest openings to poison that's going into our hearts

00:54:55--> 00:54:58

and it's one of the sources of poison for the heart.

00:55:00--> 00:55:05

The ears what you're listening to, also goes directly to the heart.

00:55:06--> 00:55:16

What's you use your tongue for? What are you talking about? What are you talking about all the time also goes into your heart.

00:55:17--> 00:56:04

And so we have to guard the openings to the heart. In order to have Mr. Comma who nikoli Heather was stopped for a lalibela come in our flow, Rahim. subhanak Hello behind duck, I should warn that Allah Hill and stuff are required to be like, just like Kamala Hayden, I think we are going to take a brief break. And I would like to just announce that there are a few limited copies of these books, reclaiming your heart, love and happiness, I lost my way and shattered glass or both transcriptions of seminars that I gave, I lost my way is about finding happiness after despair. And Shattered Glass is about healing a broken heart. It's about emotional resilience. And so if you'd like to get a

00:56:04--> 00:56:50

copy, inshallah we it's available here. But keep in mind, there are limited copies so inshallah get yours. love and happiness is a collection of quotes and insights and reclaim your heart is work that I did over like a decade, about how to live in this life without being owned by dounia. And dealing with relationships, learning to love in the right way, learning to have a balanced life with a less pinata, and with the creation. So shallow, those are available. Also one other announcement. For those of you who are looking for any type of counseling, one of the things that we're finding in our communities right now is a lot of people have problems, and they don't want to reach out for help.

00:56:50--> 00:57:09

Because sometimes there's a stigma, they feel like ashamed to ask for help, whether that problem is in your marriage or you know, a mental health issue or whatever struggle it is. So, I want to just let you know, if you are looking for any kind of help if you're having a situation where you need

00:57:11--> 00:57:53

counseling for marriage, or if you know, any brothers, one of the issues too is a lot of men, they, they they're, they're suffering, but they don't want to ask for help. If you know anyone who may be looking inshallah we can give you the reference my husband does Islamic based coaching. So he does this for couples and he does it for men's issues. He deals with all types of issues, from addiction to infidelity to problems within the marriage and does it from an Islamic perspective. So if you are interested inshallah, we will have contact details available and inshallah if you know someone then inshallah refer them because there's no shame in seeking help. This is part of our Deen and part of

00:57:53--> 00:58:01

our worship to try to do our best while putting our trust in Allah. So does that camallo heighten inshallah I will also be signing

00:58:02--> 00:58:11

at the end. So in Shall I use this break to get your copies I guess that will make the end more smooth and shallow. Does that come along with Santa Monica?