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Beyond Burnout – Overcoming Stress in your life

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Yasmin Mogahed

Channel: Yasmin Mogahed

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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Today's webinar with Southern USB Majapahit My name is Mr. Hafsa and I'm going to be your host and I'm only going to be on your screen for a couple more minutes. So please bear with me and join us in the chat. So your salons let us know where you're coming in from so that we can inshallah celebrate all the corners of the world that are tuning in for today's a webinar on the title beyond burnout, overcoming stress in your life and shuttler I'm going to wait till I see the salaams coming in shift I see Jeff Zeki Welcome to Santa Monica de la welcome just like to look for being the very first to say your salons in the chat. It's a pleasure to have you with us coming in from Toronto not too far

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away from me and hamdulillah so thank you for being the first to start us off inshallah and we're going to be being joined by Saudi yes mean in just a minute. So I want to make sure that you guys are already Sasha from Somalia furrows coming in where are you coming in from? Achmed? I can't see you. And dinar tsunami coming in from Bangladesh mashallah, what time is it in Bangladesh, Mississauga, also not too far from me. Pakistan Shafique in the house. Samia coming in from Chicago. It is such a pleasure and it has been way too long since we had a webinar with this alias mean, especially with a mugger Institute. She's one of our beloved instructors and Michelle she's come

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back with an amazing class and hamdullah that's been one of our world renowned classes with a Maghrib online and we cannot wait for you guys to get to learn more about it inshallah. But today's session I'm very excited for we only have you know a brief bit of time with her so we're going to take the most advantage of it that we can my food welcome from Copenhagen. I'm not going to pretend I can do that. That accent coming in from Denmark Masha Allah Welcome, welcome, welcome. And it please as you're getting started with us, as you're joining us, please take a second and share the link to this stream and your whatsapp groups on your Facebook Messenger chats everywhere where

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someone can benefit there's this panel I was speaking to somebody about a really stressful situation that was going on and we were in a grocery store recently. And we were looking around us And subhanAllah everyone's face looked stress. I don't know if it's the weather I don't know if it's the the climate change or whatever is happening but Subhanallah I'm seeing so much anxiety so much stretch so much, you know, dissatisfaction on the faces around me so I hope that I'm sure many of you can connect connect to that as well and and maybe you're feeling some kind of burdens that you need to release NSLDS meet as mashallah a master at this topic which is why she mashallah teaches a

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course with a monk online titled transformed the principles of spiritual development which we're going to tell you guys a little bit more about inshallah throughout the stream, but for now, I do not want to wait any longer. I see you guys warming up so please continue to share this link and get ready to be joined by Husa yes mean Majah head of a mushroom Institute s&m Anakin Allahumma vedika DISA How are you doing today?

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Ronnie Coleman Stella and welcome to Allah hamdulillah How are you have sir Alhamdulillah I am doing really well. Masha Allah, I've been enjoying all the crazy traveling that you've been doing around the globe, especially in the last little bit. But I hear you're back in the States now settled in the Midwest, how does it feel after all the hecticness to kind of come back home.

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You know what, there, there is beauty in all states. I really believe that. And Hamdulillah I do like to have some settled time at home. I'm actually not home home. But I'm in my hometown. So it's close enough. I'm actually in Wisconsin, where my mother lives. And as many of you know, my father just recently passed away like Hamill so I'm here spending some time with my mother and, you know, it's it's, it's it's bittersweet to be back home. So you know, there's always

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there's always beauty in everything. But there's always difficulty sometimes as well. I can imagine, may Allah make it easy for you and your family and reward your father agenda. I mean, you know, but let me and I don't know if you heard of that, that I was just sharing earlier that I feel like this This topic is so relevant right now because you see it on the faces of everyone that that that you pass by, and Subhanallah if you don't address, you know, the exhaustion and the mental kind of weight of all this stress, it can kind of push you to the breaking point so I'm excited for you to address this inshallah. In today's topic beyond burnout, overcoming stress in your life, and give us

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some skills to equip us to better face this inshallah. So I'm going to pass it to you and we will be in the chat. We'll take some questions and show at the end of the session, but Bismillah Let's kick it off. Okay, thank you so much. As salam o aleikum, everyone and all the villa human a shape on a regime Smilla Rahmanir Rahim o salat wa salam ala Rasulillah while annual site big mine from the sharkleave Saudi or your Sierra Leone Omri. Well, hello Dr. Millis Ania. Kohli. So I was thinking about this topic as I was driving today and I was thinking about how you know what, what would I want to share in terms of how can people deal with their lives? You know, at first the the title of

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this topic was different. And I actually requested that we changed the title, the title, or at some point was how to live a stress free life. And I was like, we need to change that topic. Um,

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We need to change that title rather. And the reason why I said that is there is no such thing as a stress free life do we don't live in Jannah, we live in dunya. And that's sort of my number one, take home, I would say. So what I wanted to leave you with, in our short time here, you know, trying to help myself and you because this is a journey that we're all in together. And that is, how to manage our lives, it's more about how to, to do our best with SN, there is no way that we're going to have a stress free life. But how can we start to, to be able to manage and even flourish despite the obstacles, so I thought that I wanted to share five points with you. And the very first one has

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to do with, you know, sort of why I changed the original title. And that is that the hard times will always come that hard times are part of the nature of dunya, that there will be times where we will be tested. And there will be times where we will be under pressure. And the purpose of those tests. And the purpose of that pressure is not ever to hurt or destroy the believer, but rather Allah subhanaw taala tells us that the purpose of a tests and the purpose of pressure, and even the purpose of stress when it is managed properly, is actually to strengthen us, to purify us and to elevate us. And if you look at this, from a, you know, even a sort of secular perspective, or even a

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literal physical perspective, if a person wants to grow in strength, or if a person wants to increase their

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their perseverance in a physical sense, right, their endurance, what does that person have to go through, that person has to go through a process of lifting heavier weight, a process of training, a process of going to the gym, there's a process that that person has to undergo, in order to build that resilience and to build that endurance. For example, if you decide that you want to run a marathon, a person doesn't just wake up and say, I'm going to run a marathon today. But there is a an entire process of training to run a marathon. And that training involves putting your body literally under stress, right, you have to, you know, train your body by going to the gym by running

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smaller periods, you know that there is there's a process of getting yourself to a point where you have enough endurance, and enough perseverance to be able to run a marathon. Now that process doesn't involve sitting on the couch as I am right now. And getting comfortable. That process involves work it improv, it involves struggle. And so stress at a sort of an essential level is needed, in order for us to grow. If we never experienced any kind of resistance, or any kind of stress or any kind of lifting that that we have to do, we wouldn't be able to grow and we wouldn't grow and we wouldn't become stronger. And so the first sort of principle that we need to realize is

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that the hard times will come and that it is necessary that it is not only that, well, you know, it's kind of like one of these things that you want to avoid, but you have to go through but it actually is an essential part of our growth and an essential part of our development in this life. It's an essential part of our purification as well. And so you know, I'll just leave you with sort of an analogy about about this, this particular point. And that is if you think about the idea of a forest fire so a forest fire is something that we don't usually think as a good thing we don't think of as a good thing we usually hear about forest fires at a point when they've gotten out of control

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or they've they've reached residents and you know, neighborhoods where they've started to become a danger to us. But if you actually go and you study forest fires, forest fires are hard in fact essential for the growth of the forest itself, which is just blew my mind when I found this out. The fact that the fire itself isn't a problem, because actually trees and forests require some level of fire in order to clear out the the forest floor and make space for new vegetation. So it's actually necessary. The fire is at some level is

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necessary. So when does it become a problem? Well, it becomes a problem when it's out of control, right? The fire itself is essential to growth. But it's when it gets out of control that it causes destruction. So now the point is, how do I keep from allowing my forest fires in my own life? From getting out of control? In other words, how do I keep from the stress, becoming out of control or destroying me instead of growing me? That's, that's the essential question, right? Where, you know, some level of lifting weight will make you stronger and thrive. Whereas if you put too much you can break your back. Right? And so the question is, number one, is realizing that the hard times will

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come in that some level of struggle in some level of lifting and some level of

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pressure is necessary, not only is it inevitable, but it is actually necessary for our growth and our own thriving. So that's number one. Number two principle is that nothing is intrinsically difficult, or easy. In its own like, like on its own right, intrinsically, but rather, how difficult and how easy something is, is actually dependent on how much help or how much we are,

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depending on ourselves. So how much help we get from Allah subhanaw taala, versus how much we are dependent upon ourselves. So let me explain that further. So any given situation, let's take the analogy of the weight that we have to carry in this life, the weight that we have to lift that, that, that weight, so in in the physical world, we would say that, okay, it's easy to lift five pounds, it's not so easy to lift 50 pounds, right. But there is another factor here that determines how easy it is to lift that weight. And that is, well, do I have a bodybuilder coming and helping me? Do I have some tool? Do I have a forklift that's actually lifting that weight, or am I lifting

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it on my own. And this analogy then extends to in the spiritual sense, how difficult or how easy a situation will be in my life is dependent upon how much help I get from Allah, and how much help I seek from a lot, and how dependent I am on myself versus how dependent I am on Allah subhanaw taala. So going back to the analogy, if I have to lift, you know, this really, really heavy thing. So for example, I'll give you a real life, personal example. While I was out of the country, while I was in Malaysia, actually, there was a bad hurricane that hit the East Coast of the United States, and I live in the southeast, part of the US in North Carolina. And apparently, while we were in Malaysia,

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actually, while I was teaching, there was some very heavy winds that hit my city. And by the time I finished my seminar in Malaysia, we had received like a video and some photos from our neighbors. And I was like, like, my jaw dropped at what had happened while I was in Malaysia. So one of the trees and I'm talking about like a giant tree, very tall, I don't even know how tall this tree was, had fallen in our backyard. And the way it fell was away from the house.

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Because had this Tree Fallen in the other direction, it would have smashed through our home, right through the roof and into the home. And so I looked at this picture, and I was just like, I just, I mean, I literally gasped because the entire tree had just become up rooted and was just lying down in our backyard. And it was, and it had fallen just a way, you know, in the direction away from the house where they land him. So

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so many lessons from this, obviously, you know, main lesson is that protection only comes from the last panel that we weren't there, there was nothing we could have done to influence which way this tree fell, there was nothing we could have done to influence the wind, the direction of the wind, the speed of the wind, the intensity of the hurricane, but Subhanallah this was completely from the protection of Allah subhanaw taala so it's a very, very good reminder of the fact that we are always desperate for the protection of Allah no matter where we are or how safe we think

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We are we literally are not in control. Only Allah subhanaw taala is in control. But going off of that, we now have this giant tree that we have to remove from our backyard, right? So how do I do that? Well, I can go and I can be like, Okay, I'm gonna lift it, right? If I try to lift this tree myself, I'm gonna break completely it. I mean, it'll, it'll, it'll, it'll crush me, if I try to lift this tree myself, I can break my back, I can become completely crushed by this tree. But if I hire someone who uses a forklift to who has now this help, to lift the treat, Is it heavy for me, it's still the same job that needs to be done. I could either try to lift it myself, or I can get someone

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to get a tool, you know, to get to get this forklift. And that have that forklift, lift up the tree and take care of the tree. Now, that's no weight for me, right? That's, that's not a struggle for me, even though it's the exact same outcome. So when we go through, you know, stress in our life or we go through difficulty in our life, we can either try to lift it ourselves, and basically break our backs or get crushed. Or we can look to Allah subhanaw taala for help, and look to Allah subhanaw taala for ease and assistance. You know, this is a lesson that we're taught every single day of our lives, at least five times a day, we call out to Allah subhanaw taala Yeah, can I go do

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what ya can assign you alone? Do we worship? And you alone? Do we seek help from next time? So one essential lesson here one essential principle in terms of dealing with stress everyday from small to big? Is what Yeah, can a Stein that you alone, do we seek help from the esteana part? We have to seek help from Allah, we cannot depend on ourselves. And you know, you think about that analogy of that tree, right? If I'm going to try to lift it myself, I will break my back, I will, I will get crushed. But if I get up in lifting that becomes easy for me. And so this is the second principle that we have to realize and that is that, that it's really summed up in one of the drawers that

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we're taught to say, during times of difficulty and that is Allah melesa Hello Illa magia Alka who said that Oh Allah, there is nothing nothing is easy, except what you make easy Allahumma Allah Salah Illa magia Alka who salah, O Allah, there is nothing easy except what you make easy wear and tear Jalil has an either ship to Salah and you can make what is difficult, what looks externally difficult, feel easy, if you will. This is a very profound concept and a very important concept to understand. And that is that nothing is is difficult or easy in and of itself right and intrinsically, but rather its difficulty or ease is dependent upon how much help Allah I have from

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Allah subhanaw taala how much assistance has Allah given me has Allah enabled me to lift this has Allah lifted it for me has a lot tied my heart as he did for the mother of Musa alayhis salam that that that concept that were taught in the Quran when Allah Allah and robot Nala called behind Allah says that had we not tied her heart together, that Allah is teaching us here that even the most difficult situations like putting your baby into the river, and just putting your trust in Allah that even that situation she was enabled like she was she was able to handle it only because Allah tied her heart together. And so what this teaches us is that if we have the help of Allah subhanaw

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taala in our lives, you know from the small to the big from the from the nuisances in our life, all the way to the to the to the huge calamities, that if Allah helps us that he can make what is difficult, feel easy. And that's what this teaches us. Hola, hola. Hola, Salah Illa Magill Sana our Oh ALLAH nothing is easy except what you make easy what and that and that you can make what actually looks or seems difficult feel easy, if you will. Well, when data journal has an either chips or Santa that what is actually difficult or seems difficult. You can make it easy if you will. So we ask Allah subhanaw taala by this dot and several other do as you know there's not enough time right

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now to get into all of these doors. But the there are, this is a concept that we have to understand which is that I should not rely on myself in my in anything that I do in my life but that an ISP

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especially when I'm going through hard times to seek the help and aid and assistance of Allah subhanaw taala. And that will make it lighter. And that will make it easier for me and you just, you know, think of the analogy of that tree, they're lifted yourself, or you and you break your break your back along the way or you, you get a forklift. And so we ask Allah subhanaw taala, to be our forklift, right to to lift our our burdens and to make them light upon us. Because if I have that forklift, or I have someone driving that forklift, this burden of removing this tree becomes light on me. And that's what we asked from Allah subhanaw taala, to make our burdens light. So that's

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number two. Number three, is that we have to lean into the good or change or manage our focus. Now what this is about is this is basically a summary of the whole concept of gratitude, daily practice of gratitude, because our lives change depending on what we focus on in our lives. You know, as I say, many times what you focus on grows, and so if you are the type of person who just basically trains your mind to focus on the good, to focus on the things that you love the things that are gifts and blessings in your life, and you show gratitude for those things, then those things will grow, not only will they grow, because God will give you more what it adds another bucola in Chicago

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tonight, as he then Netcom, Allah says that, that if you are thankful, I will increase you. So not only does Allah give us more when we show gratitude, but also from a psychological perspective, when we show gratitude, and when we focus on our blessings, they actually grow in our own minds. So we see them as being bigger, we, we experience them as being as being all encompassing. So we don't, we don't see.

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We don't, we're not enlarging our difficulties, we're enlarging our blessings. But it works the other way as well. So if we are the type of person who focuses only on the things we don't like, on our problems, everything that's missing, you know, everything is not good enough in our lives. Sometimes we only focus on everything that's not good enough in ourselves to we do this to ourselves, and we do a lot of sort of self flagellation, you know, beating ourselves up where, like, we could, we could have a lot of good qualities and a lot of strengths. But instead, we just focus on that one thing that we don't like, you know, we do this, you know, in our physical appearance,

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but we also do this with our, with our, with our, with our strengths and our weaknesses, that sometimes, by focusing on the things we don't like in ourselves, we're also enlarging them, and we become sort of, they can become very overwhelming. Now, I'm not saying that we don't try to improve, we definitely should. But it's very dangerous to focus on the negative, it's very dangerous to focus only on the things that are missing the things that are, you know, not as we want them. And so we start, they start to look bigger, and we start to become a lot. And when something looks bigger, it obviously becomes heavier, and it starts to weigh on us. And so I will feel our life will feel like

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heavier, our problems start to feel a lot heavier. And so it's very, very important to actively force ourselves, even if we're not in this habit, and we're not used to it maybe because of our upbringing, maybe because of a lot of modeling that we saw in our in our parents, that we have to train our brains to focus on the good to focus on the blessings because in the Malossi Islam, Allah always gives ease along with the difficulties in nut Mal, through us with the difficulty is ease in a very general, you know, sense. So, and Allah repeats this, right? So it's important that we're, we're, we're training ourselves to show gratitude, to focus on the good and not to be the type of

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person who only focuses on what is negative, or what's missing in our lives.

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The fourth principle is not to lose hope. So,

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you know, a lot of times we can become very exhausted, you know, like, the, the title implies burnout, right? You know, I've been doing this and it's just not working. You know, I've been trying for this outcome and it's just I keep failing, no matter how hard I try, I just keep falling. You know, and it's easy to become discouraged. And you know, I, I personally get a lot of inspiration from the story of hedgehog because hedgehog, this is a story of a woman who was in a very, very impossible situation and she could have given up you know, she she, she tried looking on sofa for any sign of life or any sign of

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help any sign of anything, she found nothing. And she could have given up but she didn't. She ran to the next mountain, which is Manuel write. Again, she could have given up after that. But she didn't, she went back to self up. And then she could have given up then she didn't, she went back to mandala. And she could have given up then, but she didn't, she went back to suffer. And she did this seven times. So there's a lot to reflect on you that that Allah is teaching us look at the look at this woman who was all alone in the desert with her baby. And both are like, you know, almost at their death there from dehydration, right. And yet, she never gave up. She went between Safa and

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Marwa not once or twice, but seven times. And so there's a lesson here about not giving up, not losing hope, and continuing to strive, even when we are not seeing immediate results, you know, use this example, you know, when a person goes and plant a tree,

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they planted the tree and maybe after six months, they don't see any result. You know, it's not working. It's not working, maybe you know, another year, that maybe if the seed is under the ground, say

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you may not see any results. And you may think that it isn't working, but it's growing. And there's a process that it has to go through. So

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don't lose hope and become discouraged because you're not seeing immediate results, you know, to continue to strive like soft, like like, like hedging on insulin between Safa and Marwa you know, sometimes that side, you know the side needs to strive sometimes that side has to be over and over and over. And it's part of the process, you know, Allah subhanaw taala teaches us that things require a process, you know, when when a baby is being developed inside the womb of the mother, it you know, Allah could have just said be in it is and you know, a woman just gives birth after a day, Allah could have done that. But Allah subhanaw taala designed it. So it would take nine long, maybe

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sometimes difficult months. This is part of the process. And so this is the Sunnah of Allah that everything requires a process. And sometimes, you know, when a woman you know, first conceit when when when the woman is pregnant, and is just at the very, very beginning of her pregnancy,

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you might look at her and be like, there's nothing happening. You know what I mean? Like, and then you see her after three weeks, four weeks a month, and you're like, it's not working, you know, there's nothing really happening there. But the reality is that there is there is something happening, but it is unseen. And there is growth, and there is change, but it is unseen. And so sometimes the change in our lives, the growth in our lives is unseen, just like that seed that was under the ground. It is growing, and it is changing, but we can't see it at that point. So you know, same thing with that with the, with the embryo that is developing, but you can't see it. And you

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might think, oh, there's nothing happy, you don't have an ultrasound, you might not even think anything's happening. And so within our lives, sometimes the change in the growth is unseen, but that doesn't mean that it isn't happening. And so we have to be able to sort of persevere through the lack of results, and sometimes through the unseen. And to realize that everything requires a process and sometimes we're not going to see immediate results. Finally, principle five, number five, is that this too shall pass. And every single thing in this life is temporary. And so you know, at this, while this reality can sometimes give us you know, sadness, well, the good things

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aren't gonna last but neither are the hard things. So everything about this life is temporary, the good and the bad. And so no storm lasts forever. You know, just like the sun is not always going to be out and sometimes the sun is going to set.

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Similarly, it isn't going to be night forever. It's never going to be night forever. So if you are in a situation right now where it just feels really dark, and it just feels like there's so much pressure and it's really dark. Realize that if you study the nature of this life if you study the Sunnah of Allah subhanaw taala no night lasts forever, the sun always rises again. And that is the nature of this life that it is always moving, it is always changing and that everything eventually returns to Allah subhanaw taala coolamon Allah has done every single thing is passing away. Everything is temporary. So this should give us a comfort in our difficult times as well because no

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difficult time will last forever.

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and it will always change and it will always it will always become in sha Allah better because just like the night that turns in today our difficulties will also be alleviated. So, you know, getting through it is part of getting through it is being able to persevere and then also continue to have hope, because this too shall pass. Clinically. Heather was Dr. Ali, welcome in our pura Rahim clinical OB hendak Chateau La La Land to Sakurako to Boulais.

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Jessica la sera, sera, I feel like the lessons there stack and stack and stack on top of one another. I love this course every time it launches. And for those who don't know, this is just a snapshot of a lot of the topics that we saw there yesterday, which I had covered in her online course with a Maghrib Institute titled to transform to principles of spiritual development, the QR code is on the screen, and it's linked as well in the chats and in the description and everything but this course Subhanallah I feel like a lot of people wait too long to heal their, you know, their traumas, and there's so panels so much that people struggle through, but healing has to start with

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yourself, it has to come with this kind of self realization. And then when you bring Allah subhanaw taala in it, when you, you know work towards a lot with your healing, everything else falls into place, whether it's your emotions, whether it's your relationships with other people, whether it's your relationship with the dean, it's all interconnected. Subhanallah so when you're speaking, I'm thinking of like 20 Different things this applies to in my life. And I'm sure a lot of people are doing the same in the chat as well. But I've hadn't been aware that we have this resource through this course transformed, and I do encourage everybody to register while you can, because this is an

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amazing on demand course. But the caveat is that it's closing in a couple of days. And I know apologies for those who just found out sometimes we just bring it on you but and hamdulillah it is available on demand. So you guys can access the content and the knowledge inshallah for lifetime, but you do have to register in next couple of days so that you can be part of the student community and you can start the healing process inshallah. Now, so that I know, there's gonna be a lot of questions like there always are during these sessions, so we'll see if we can take a handful of them. So if anyone has questions on today's topic beyond burnout, overcoming stress in your life

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with this is an image I had dropped them into the chat, we'll select a few of them, wherever you guys are, if it's YouTube or Facebook, just drop it into the chat, and we will find the questions, and we will address them in Sharla. But in the meantime, so that we launched this course, a couple of times, and Hamza before we have a dedicated transformed community online. What is your favorite part about teaching this course? I know, it's been recorded, and it's been professionally edited. But what's what was the best part of this course for you?

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Honestly, I love teaching this course, because of the aha moments that I think it brings. For a lot of people I can speak personally, you know, the process of learning these things for me wasn't very easy. I

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you know,

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human beings, and not the most.

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You know, like, I'm one of those types of people who it's like, you can tell, you can tell me something. And it's like, I have to, I have to learn it myself, you know, like one of those kinds of kids. And

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I think

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y'all, y'all are pieces of work. I have those in my life. I know you're talking, I know your dad or your siblings.

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Yeah, you know, it's like, it's like, you know,

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for better or for worse. So anyways, you know, I always wish that like I can, I can share these lessons so that I can save a lot of other people the the heartache that I went through to learn them. And you know, I think I think for a lot of people that is the case, I think they learn. I think that a lot of these lessons that I teach in transformed and I teach in my book, reclaim your heart and in my new book, Healing the emptiness these are life lessons that I don't, I don't want other people to go through the the types of pain you have to go through to learn knees

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on your own, you know, and so I think for me, my favorite part about teaching it is to try to help people from continuing to suffer, like, like to how to try to help people stop their own suffering, because a lot of what we don't realize is although Pain is inevitable in this life, but suffering doesn't have to be inevitable. And suffering is something that sometimes, oftentimes we contribute to our own suffering. And we don't realize why we're doing it, we're actually contributing, causing our own suffering. And there are and these are lessons that if we can learn them, we can actually alleviate a lot of our suffering. You know, I'm not like I said, I started off there's no such thing

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as a stress free life. There's this there's no such thing as a pain free life. But suffering is a whole different thing. And I think a lot of people are actually going through a lot of suffering in their life, and they don't realize what they're doing to contribute to it.

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Yeah, and I feel like a lot of times people look for healing and like really quick shots and look for like quick solutions to things like this. So they'll watch a quick video and they'll get a bit of a high or they'll look for, you know, like a quick quote or this and that, but they'll still like under the surface be struggling with things, they just won't, they don't have the time to invest in therapy, or they're not, they're not taking the time to take care of that aspect of their lives. And it's affecting everything. But it's really hard. I think nowadays, especially 100. Another conversation, the doors have been opened, I think sisters and brothers are tackling some of the

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emotional and psychological and things that are distressing them, and realizing that they need to treat this these issues. But there's, there's a lot that can be done. And what I love about transformed is that I've come to that it's a safe space, it's a private community. So only those who are registered, are having access to the content and to the community itself. And that as they're going and navigating through all these modules in these lessons, there's some amazing ones. Some of my favorites, I just kind of pulled out or you know, healthy and unhealthy attachments and how to protect and nourish your heart and dealing with depression and anxiety and broken hearts and

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practical steps like we did today to deal with stress and challenging relationships, children in laws, spouses, all that fun stuff, is that while they're going through all that if they have questions, or if they're still not 100% sure about anything, they can access you through live q&a sessions that happen though with the rest of the student audience. So that's a beautiful part of the course. Those are live, but they're recorded as well. So if you can't make it if you're in a funky time, even always, inshallah catch up with the rest of the community that was that, I see that there are some questions that are submitted through these chats, they're going way too fast for me, but I

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caught a few of Hamdulillah. And our amazing social media manager was able to grab some as well. So I'm going to quickly jump in and grab one of the questions that I see. And we'll close off in just a few minutes with you and show up. So first question is, what is the best way to deal with this stress and extreme anxiety?

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So there are several doors to dealing with this. I actually have an entire section in healing the emptiness where I just give list lists upon lists of specific doors in Arabic and in English. transliteration, basically, doors that are prescribed by Allah and His messenger for anxiety for depression for hard times, but I'll just give you a few one that the prophets I send them recommended as the DA of a Eunice la salaam La ilaha illa Anta Subhana iniquity terminal volume in that this was the DUA that unicel is Salam said when he was in the belly of the whale and or the giant fish and Allah subhanaw taala saved him. La ilaha illa Anta Subhana Allah iniquity amount of

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volume there is nothing worthy of worship but you exalted as you I was among the wrong doors, and this door the prophets I seldom actually quoted as being one of the best doors for times of difficulty there da of Eunice la Salem another door is the one that I mentioned in my talk which was Allahu melesa Allah Illa merger alto sila who entertains you alone has an either should say Allah Oh ALLAH There's nothing easy except what you make easy and if you will, you can make what is difficult, feel easy. Another two that were told by the prophets I send them is a in a hadith he says that there is no individual who experiences any amount of depression difficulty sadness, even

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the you know, just any kind of distress except that they say this door and it is alleviated for them Allahumma in the abdomen in Abdic ematic nausea TV addict Malden fear Pocomoke Island via Kedah UK and it goes on I'll just generally translated and then inshallah we can share it. This is also something that we you know, these are all resources that we will share and I'll have for those who register for this class I'll also have some live q&a is where we'll be discussing these things and and and I'll be taking questions but I will also be giving more resources inshallah these are also available in my book in specifically in the new book healing the emptiness because I give a very I

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it's like a handbook of many different doors along with the translation, but this particular one Aloma in the abdomen begins with Oh Allah I am your slave, the child of your male and female slave. So if you look up this dua and you you know inshallah we'll we can share it as well. But if you Google it, and you look up that translation at the beginning, it'll bring you this da but it continues on after you. You know, you ask Allah Subhana Allah, many Abdullah Abdullah Ignatz Ignacia to be yedek Maldon Thea hockomock Agilent, via Kedah.

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So you're asking Allah Subhana Allah by all his beautiful names and your exalting Allah subhanaw taala. And then you're saying after all of that, you're asking that Allah subhanaw taala would make the Quran the spring of your heart, the end the alleviate or of your district, your side

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Notice and it's just such a beautiful to add because it's asking Allah to alleviate your sadness to give your heart this like ease and to do it by his color and by his dickheads. So it's it's such a beautiful comprehensive DUA and and we're told by the prophesy send them that this door alleviates any kind of distress depression anxiety etc. Another one just really quickly is La hawla wala Quwata 11 that were told in a hadith that, that this word that this statement La hawla wala Quwata illa know that there is no change in state and no power or strength except by Allah is actually a cure for 99 ailments and the least of them are, is stress.

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Beautiful physical affair, so that and that's one thing I do love about your teaching style. And Michelle in the course as well is that you give us a struggle a pain, you give us a story that goes along with it. And there's always the odd there's always a solution from the Quran, or the Sunnah Alhamdulillah that we have, that we're left with. So it's not just an inspiration, it's actually something we can practically incorporate into our lives. So just like a prayer for that. I have another question. And shall we'll take a couple more before we close. And the next question is, what if the people that you love are giving you stress and you cannot leave them? What should a Muslim I

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do?

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Well, this is a very multi dimensional question. Because on the one hand, the and by the way, I'll just say this, there isn't a single seminar, I think I've done anywhere in the world where I didn't get this question in some in some form or another. And that is because obviously, in our DNA, we have this concept of

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slugterra him, you know, keeping and

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connecting the ties of kinship, very important. We have a concept of been unwed a day between wedding day being kind and dutiful to our parents send to our parents, these are all very important concepts. But then then there's the struggle of what happens when you know, maybe a parent is abusive or a family member is abusive, how what do you do in that case? So there are two issues here. One is when it is a family member that you cannot divorce, right? So like a parent, a sibling, etc.

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In those cases, yes, there is the principle of solid Rahim and the importance of solid Rahaman better and where they didn't validate that, that are just fundamental concepts in our deen, you know, keeping the ties of kinship and being kind and dutiful to our parents. These are fundamental principles. However, self preservation comes before that where if there is a harm that will come to you, then you have to protect yourself and your family from that harm. Protect yourself and your children from them harm depending on on what the situation is. So what I say to people is, you know, you do your best to keep the ties of kinship and not have to cut those ties. But at the same time,

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you don't put yourself in harm's way you don't put yourself in a situation where you're being harmed, either physically or psychologically, emotionally or spiritually, okay? When it comes to a situation where it isn't a family member, but maybe it's a spouse, you know, we don't we don't say that you put up with with abuse. We don't say that, you know, this is another concept which I discussed and transformed. But the sort of toxic definition of Sabra that we sorted that we have a lot of times taught in our in our some of our circles, and that is this idea that you're supposed to turn the other cheek or you're supposed to put up with that subber means to put up with abuse, this

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is absolutely false. This is not what silver means. It is not from our deen to allow yourself to be abused to allow your family or your children to be abused. Your children are an Amana and you will be asked about how you protected them from harm. And so we are not supposed to keep our selves or our or our children in a situation where there is harm. And it is not better for the children. You know, a lot of times I hear women all over the worlds you know, saying that we're you know, we stayed for the sake of the children, even men, we stayed for the sake of the children. But the children end up suffering the most when they are living in abusive or toxic homes. And so it's

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extremely important that we don't put up with this and call it sub, you know, this idea that Sabra means to drink poison and to keep a smile on your face that is not the meaning of sub, that we have to actually take action to protect ourselves in our families if there is harm. So you know, whether that is

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a spouse or it is a family member, either way, we are not supposed to be or continue to be in a situation that is bringing harm.

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Just like a lottery, so that's a panela. I'm very glad that you two Ed took off a little bit and address some of those difficulties. There's a couple more

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questions that are coming in? I'm gonna take one last one. And I'm sorry to those who submitted. Michelle, some amazing questions have been submitted. But keep in mind, we do have live q&a sessions in the course to tackle a lot of these concepts after you guys have watched the modules that we saw that has created for you. The next and the final question for now is

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what is sorry, I've been making the offer a few years should I give up? Or should I keep making this thought?

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Well, I don't know what the DUA is. And Allah subhanaw taala knows best. So what I would say is, you know, you ask Allah subhanaw taala for what you want, obviously, we're asking we should be asking a lot obviously for Halal things, but we never know what is best for us either. Right? So on the one hand, you continue to ask Allah dua itself is worship right, a dry hole, a bad or a door Am I bad that dua is in and of itself worship, dua is the head or mind of worship. So dua itself is a is the essence is like one of the

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one of the most important essences of of worship because it brings us closer to Allah subhanaw taala. So the most important outcome of July isn't necessarily whether or not Allah gives us what we asked. But the most important outcome of dua is that actually, I'm speaking to God and I'm getting closer to him through that speaking, and through that intimacy, and that closeness of speaking to Allah subhanaw taala is especially in a state of need. So when I'm in a state of need, it makes me more open and more receptive to getting closer to Allah subhanaw taala. See, Allah's light is always there. But the question is, how receptive Am I to that light, how you know, how permeable how

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permeable are my senses to that light of that divine light. And so I become more more absorbent and more able to receive the light of Allah subhanaw taala when I am,

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sometimes when I'm in need, and when I'm in need, I call out to Allah subhanaw taala in a much more humble way, and in a much more, almost desperate way. And that brings me closer to Him, that allows his love and His mercy and His light to penetrate me deeper. And so that actually becomes the best outcome of the DA so you can keep making the DA, knowing that whether or not you get that specific thing in the form that you're asking, you're still getting something greater, through that da

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does that good luck HERSA for spending some time with us today and tackling this topic and so many others, mashallah, in this short bit of time that we've had, I do want to encourage everyone who's listening to make sure that if you've benefited at all, one is to make sure you share this content with others or so many people who are hurting and who need healing, and this is inshallah a great resource for them. And of course, to register with the QR code that you see on screen or in the description or in the chat, wherever you are to transformed online with wasabi SV, which I had, was that I still remember last year. Part of the cute part of the class, of course, is our bonus q&a

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Live q&a sessions. And I don't know what you drank or ate before those q&a sessions. But those were some of the most memorable moments of my life that you're really

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I don't know if you remember, I might have to share the recording with you.

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I believe it i Yeah, it happens.

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Private community, I don't know what it is Shala I don't know if coffee or Chai actually before this sessions, but you're on a roll and I can't wait. It usually you know, sometimes what I believe is that there's someone in the audience that needs to hear something. And it's like Allah subhanaw taala wants that person to hear it. So I just become a tool to say like, that's how that I literally that's how I feel like and sometimes, you know, even before I begin to speak, you know, when I'm when I'm teaching a seminar, I asked people to make that drive, I asked people to make dua that whatever it is that they needed to hear that they hear it because I don't know what they need, you

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know, I don't know what they're going through. I don't know what they're struggling with. But Allah does, you know, so I really, that's what I think is that that was a it was just, it's just about

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you know, it's like who needs to hear that so inshallah to go into it Mashallah. And they always end up being such a hoot and such a success. So just like a lifter I can't wait to follow to interact with you and those live q&a sessions. And just a recap of everything that we've discussed in the past little bit. Transformed online, is closing in a couple of days. It's of course, it's a Sunday it's been which I had an amalgam Institute, and it's got a full 100 love for Module course prepared for you guys. You get access to a private member portal, live q&a sessions, bonus sessions, you know, extra resources and things like that, that we are sharing in this session, inshallah. It'll be

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a lot more in depth than that. So if you are in

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interested and if you've benefited from this session, I highly recommend that you guys register Inshallah, we will see you guys on the other side if you have any questions or little chat on that page that you can reach out to, or you can reach out to info at a maghrib.org We cannot wait to see you. We cannot wait to enjoy their time with you Inshallah, as well. So thank you so much for being with us here today. And I know we're gonna see you tomorrow as well for those who are asking for more webinars and more sessions and more things and shuttler Same time tomorrow we're going to be here on the topic of detox, how to break unhealthy patterns and take back control and I cannot wait

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for that. So that's 3:30pm 8:30pm PST, be there inshallah invite your friends, and we'll see you soon for now. Take care Stay happy, stay healthy, stay safe. And s&m. aneko Rahmatullahi.

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Wa alaykum the center