Domestic Violence And How To Deal With It

Yasir Qadhi

Channel: Yasir Qadhi

Episode Notes

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Shaykh Dr. Yasir Qadhi addresses the topic of domestic violence which is prevalent and rampant in all sects of society. He delves on matters related to the position of the Qur’an and Sunnah when it comes to prohibition of violence against women, the types of abuse (physical, emotional) women have to deal with and what should be one’s stance in the wake of being the subject of domestic violence.

Islam in no way supports this un-Islamic and toxic practice and if anyone resorts to this demeaning act, it is only because of defects in his behaviour and not because of religion.

A’ishah RA said, “The Messenger of Allah ﷺ never struck a servant of his with his hand, nor did he ever hit a woman. He never hit anything with his hand, except for when he was fighting Jihad in the cause of Allah.”

Treat your wives with kindness. The Shariah does not condone the abuse of wives. In light of the ideal man who is the Prophet ﷺ, we should imbibe and inculcate the Hadiths given to us and stand firm on the teachings of Qur’an and Sunnah.

The final Khutbah made by the Prophet ﷺ addresses women :

“O People, it is true that you have certain rights with regard to your women, but they also have rights over you. Remember that you have taken them as your wives only under Allah’s trust and with His permission. If they abide by your right then to them belongs the right to be fed and clothed in kindness. Do treat your women well and be kind to them for they are your partners and committed helpers. And it is your right that they do not make friends with any one of whom you do not approve, as well as never to be unchaste.”

 

Episode Transcript

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Barely All praise is due to Allah subhana wa tada we praise Him and we seek his help. And we seek refuge in Allah from the evil of our souls and the consequences of our actions. Indeed whomever Allah subhana wa tada guides, there's none who can misguide. And whomever Allah subhana wa Jalla misguides none can guide him back to the straight path. bear witness and I testify that there's no deity worthy of worship except for Allah subhana wa Tada. And I bear witness and I testify that Mohammed Abdullah is the final prophet, and the most perfect worshipper of our Lord sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Allah subhana wa tada has commanded us in the Koran by saying, Yeah, you hola

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Dena, Amano la helper to call it. What are temotu illa, one two Muslim on are you who believe be conscious of Allah as only he deserves, and do not die, except in a state of submission to him? as to what follows? Imagine my brothers in Islam, the most expensive and the best blessing that you possess, imagine your most cherished gift. How would you treat this blessing and this gift? What protocols would you use when it comes to this precious blessing that you desire that is of great benefit to you? Obviously, every one of us would treat such a gift with tenderness with care with love. None of us would intentionally misuse a gift that is precious to us. None of us would harm or

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damage or wreck such a gift. It is impossible to imagine a sane person doing so. Well then what do we do in light of the Hadeeth of the process? And who told us what is the best gift that a luck can give us our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, there is nothing that a believer benefits from more after the taqwa of Allah, that is more beneficial for him, then a righteous spouse reported by Ibn majah. How foolish then and harmful it is. If a man amongst us abuses and harms that precious blessing that Allah subhana wa tada has blessed us with this month, the month of October, is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. And for us as Muslims, these months don't change anything, but

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they are occasions that are useful to remind us of what should be known throughout the whole year and every month and every single day. And that is that this religion of ours is a religion of compassion and mercy, and that it does not and cannot tolerate domestic violence and abuse against our spouses and families. Sadly, the statistics when it comes to this phenomenon, are very chilling, in this country alone, and this country claims to be of the most advanced in the world. In this country alone across all ethnicities and religions. One out of every three women is the victim of physical abuse by their own partners. Every year, over 10 million people are victims of physical

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abuse, physical spousal abuse, every single day, more than 20,000 people call special hotlines across this country, complaining seeking protection against their partners. And by the way, this is physical abuse that is reported. There is much more that is unreported. And then there is something called emotional abuse, which is almost impossible to report and to quantify much less qualified brothers and sisters that holds the bus topic today is one that is taboo in most of our teams and most of our massages, but it should not be taboo. The topic today is rarely mentioned amongst enlightened circles of Muslims, because we find it embarrassing. It is a open secret that spousal

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abuse is rampant in our communities. I challenge that almost every one of us almost every one of us is aware of some couples, some family that is going through spousal abuse, and yet it is a topic that is almost unheard of. And even in polite conversation in our gatherings. We simply do not bring it up. What is even more reprehensible. What is even more despicable, not just our tacit silence, but that some amongst us who are guilty of physical abuse who are guilty of violence against their partners and their loved ones, some misguided people

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amongst us actually dare to justify that violence with the Quran and the Sunnah. They believe they have a religious sanction, they believe they have permission from their Lord to harm their loved ones. And they always quote a phrase here and there and they say oh, I am implementing this ayah and this hadith. Now in this hotel, we do not have time to get into the details of Tafseer of exit Jesus and Willa he brothers and sisters, you know, by now, I am not a progressive or a modernist who wants to reinterpret the Quran and Sunnah I am faithful to the tradition. And yet I say, even though we don't have time to to go into the details of that one ayah, which is what the reborn, the famous is

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certainly, sir. And yet I say, these people who quote that verse, while law he, they are not doing it because of the verse, they do what they do, and they beat and they are violent, and then they want to justify after they have done the deed. Don't quote me Eman and taqwa when you have no idea of the manners of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam, you have never opened a book of Tafseer and you dare quote me and if you don't know the basics of fit, and then you attempt to post justify, once you've done the deed or that is your lifestyle, then you take on the aura of religious sanctity, and you say, oh, Allah has allowed me and the Prophet system has allowed me Do not lie to

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those who are more knowledgeable than you, you are not qualified to interpret the Quran and you have not studied the books of Tafseer. And as I said, well lucky we will inshallah someday give more detail, because it's not my methodology to reinterpret the Quran. And yet I stand before you today and I say how can anybody take this one phrase of the Quran and ignore explicit Quranic is an explicit a hadith and explicit syrup of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam? How can you ignore what our Isha herself said, inside his body when she said, I swear by Allah, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam never raised his hand against a woman, or even a servant, don't quote me, I attend

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a hadith and ignore what the wife of the process of herself is saying, I swear by a lion his entire life, he never raised his hand against a woman and a servant. Then she said, unless he was in jihad, and perhaps he was fighting somewhere, but in the household, never did, he raised his house, and it is narrated in the Sahaba had been hidden, which is one of the books of Sahib that our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam gave the command, it is now not allowed to hit your wives. So the command came down, it is not allowed. This was the commandment and the Prophet system implemented it. He said, you cannot get your wives. Then after a few weeks, a group of people came to complain, they

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said, the rule of law, our wives are taking advantage of this prohibition. Our wives, they're now going beyond the bounds. So initial commandment do not do it. Some time goes by, and then the men come and they complain that look, this commandment is being misused, and we want the permission back, we want the permission to put them back in their place, quote, unquote. And so the process and reluctantly gave them permission to do so. The next day 70 women came to the house of the profits, the lawyer said them complaining about their husband's treatment last night 70 women complaining to the profits of the law while he was selling them. The Profit System gave a whole talk. Even though

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it wasn't Friday, he gathered the Sahaba together. It wasn't terrible for him. It was not taboo for him to address domestic abuse. He gathered the Sahaba together. And he said that today 70 women came to my house complaining about their husbands what a Mullah. This is one of the custom of the Arabic language, one of the ways you swear to give emphasis, it's more than just one. Well, it's a very strong custom, that I swear by Allah, these men whom these wives are complaining about are not the best amongst you. This is what our processes are publicly he embarrassed and chastise these men, these men are not the best amongst you that their wives have been treated this way, and they're

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coming to complain to me, so don't quote me half an ayah. Don't quote me a phrase of a hadith and ignore the rest of the zero ignore what is explicitly in the member of the prophecies that have he publicly announced amongst the people. This is not the way that a gentleman and a real movement treats a minute. And how about the Quran in his explicit commandments to husbands? Why should Nabeel maruf treat your wives with my roof? What is my roof? My roof has been translated as kindness according to the culture of the time, kindness according to the circumstances,

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Because my roof also goes back to earth and Earth is the culture and what this means is that in different places different societies, what is culturally acceptable what is the norm changes from time to time? So what is the proper way that a gentleman acts? What is the proper way a man acts with his wife, this, indeed is a spectrum different cultures have different ways of showing spousal love. So Allah is saying the commandment in the Koran in accordance with the time and place, treat your wives with the utmost kindness, why should we not be maruf and therefore, brothers and sisters, given this ayah that there is clearly a spectrum of growth, of interpretation in terms of culture,

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and knowing the cultural circumstances and the changing of times that we now live in, it is clear to say that the Shetty does not condone the abusing of wives the shady or does not justify or allow given the dynamic changes. And I say very clearly may be perhaps in some interpretations of, of the books of faith and in some cultures and places in some circumstances. And what are those circumstances? What is new shoes when Allah allows it in the Quran? He says, when you fear new shoes, do you even know what new shoes is? Some of the books of Tafseer said new shoes is when you fear a woman is flirting with a man, an engineer, be a stranger and it might lead to Xena. In other

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words, adultery. And in that society of john helia. You know, norms were not established about monogamy about people being faithful to one another. Maybe in some times, in places maybe some types of physical disciplining might have saved a marriage. But given the dynamics of today, and given the norms of marriage today and of society today, and most importantly, in light of the ideal man, and that is our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, it is really impossible to extrapolate from the [???]ty to justify from the shady, the type of rampant wife abuse that takes place in our own cultures, brothers and sisters, no matter what interpretation of God are, you follow? You will never

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find a single scholar in the history of this woman that has justified beating a woman because of some petty issue. You don't like the food you don't like this, you don't like that. This is completely unjustifiable. And that is why I say unequivocally spare me your false piety. It is not from imminent taqwa that you are beating your wife, this is who you are, and then you want to justify it from the Quran and Sunnah. We're not going to buy this from you. The Quran and Sunnah does not allow this type of abuse that is unfortunately rampant amongst many segments of our own society. Oh men, oh men, realize that these women that you are misusing and abusing these women that

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you are transgressing on, they are the daughters to other men, they are sisters of other men, they are mothers of your own children. Would you want your own daughter to be treated the way that some of you treat your own wives? Would you want your own daughter to be treated in the household that you're going to send her to the way that some of you treat your own wives come to the you know to Dan, as you do unto others, it shall be done unto you. This is a maximum of shediac This is a maximum of our religion come out to the unit to that fear Allah azza wa jal and the wrath of the mobile loom and the drop of the Muslim and this is exactly what our Prophet says that I've said that

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in the Hadith in Sahih Bukhari so again, don't quote me your misunderstandings. How did this disciple hottie the Prophet system is yet he's amazed he's astonished? How can one of you beat your wives like you beat your servants, your animals? And then you will sleep with her at night? How can you do this? She is a woman that is the mother of your children. She is your life partner. This is our profit system is expressing amazement. How can you do that she's a human being even before being the sister of somebody and the daughter of somebody, she is a human, a woman that is your life partner? How can one of you the process that I've said before, like you beat an animal or servant,

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and then at night you will go and sleep with her, he himself is amazed, because will law he this is not possible for a loving, caring person to treat another person in this manner and then have a bond of intimacy a bond of of relationship between them. And remember the Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu it said and reported in the Muslim Ummah, Mohammed, when he said to the Muslims, Allahumma and he is saying, He is speaking to Allah but the audience is us. Right? He is addressing Allah, but he's speaking out loud for the Muslims to hear Allahumma in need or how to read your help. kobbari Fein Eliot to me was a death isn't Muslim or Mohammed or a law and this is a public

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announcement. I am making it very strict and severe will have religion

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There's no one word in English. But what it basically means is that I am making sure everybody understands how significant the half of these to the eighth, which is weak people are weak categories have, I am making their health very high. What is the toolbar at the two week, Alia team and almora, the orphan and the woman. Now, some women will say how come the process was comparing us to an orphan and the response is an orphan what is an orphan need protection, love. An orphan needs somebody to take care of it, and will law he the women, the woman, what she primarily needs is love. What she needs is that nurturing and care the shelter, as well an orphan usually has nobody to take

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care of that person. Many times a woman who has been married off, she feels as if she has nobody else to take care of her except her husband. So the process of equated the matter with the team, even to the model is not a team. The model is not a team, but the point of having the need for somebody for protection. And also the the sense that there's nobody to help me I'm all alone here. How many of our women they feel that sense of aloneness. And so our Prophet sallallahu Sallam reminded us, and it's an announcement that is addressed to a lot, even though it's meant for us, or a law. I am exalting the status. And the hack of the toolbar is groups of people that your team and

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the model, which means our profit system is telling us beware of harming the team be aware of harming the woman. These are two groups, their rights have been exalted by our Prophet salallahu idea he was setting them and remember when the shediac came down, remember when Islam was revealed in the Koran came down, wife abuse and spousal abuse was rampant men would constantly beat and whip and lash and, and slap their wives all the time in that society. The Quran and Sunnah was very clear. And our Profit System said in that authentic hadith reported in a Buddha, in many books of Hadith that a man said, a messenger of Allah, what is the rights that my wife has over me, in a

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society where wife beating was common? What did our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam say that the rights that your wife have over you, when you eat, she is eating with you, when you have clothes, she has clothes with you, meaning the point is, obviously if you don't have any money and you're hungry, well, then couples have to suffer together as well. That's the reality, but you cannot eat and have her hungry. So whenever you eat, she has to eat, when you are dressed, she has to be dressed, meaning you live, you have her live like you the the standard of living is going to be like you. And then he said, and do not slap her do not slap her across the face. What to a bad and do

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not. And we're going to have to translate over here and do not abandon her except in her house. These are three things mentioned, right? Do not slap her across the face. And slapping was the most common type of hit. And the Hadeeth came in for bait that do not do that. And then number two is to cut back we'll do it we'll we'll leave the copier for a minute. Number three Do not leave her except in her house. Meaning what if you have an argument if you have a fight, you cannot kick her out. You cannot tell her to go back to her family. Unless it's divorced. That's a different reality after the three months otherwise, in every average dispute, and average couples have fights. This is the

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reality. If you're going to sleep separately, if you're going to then you go and sleep in the living room, not her. And if it's even worse than that, and you want to leave the house, you go and get the hotel, not her. And this is by the way, all allowed in Islam, tempers flare, even our profit system, and to be fully honest here, even our process of them marital disputes did happen. And he had to leave the household who slept in the masjid he did. He slept in the masjid. So sometimes arguments get really bad. And yes, this is all normal. That's okay. Arguments happen. But you never kick her out. You want to go you leave, she has to remain at home. And that's what our process of said, never

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abandon her. Except if she's in her house, then you get angry and you walk out well then that's your business, but you cannot kick her out of the house. That's not what our shed er allows. Now I want to get back to this phrase one out to a bear. Because from this, we get to the second main type of abuse and that is emotional abuse. We talked about physical abuse. Now we get to the second type of abuse, which is emotional abuse. What is to be mean? To cut they literally means to make her feel ugly,

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to make her feel negative about herself. So the first part says don't hit her on the face. And the second part says don't demean her in a nasty manner. And this is the textbook definition of emotional abuse.

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Use. This is the textbook definition of emotional abuse that to make the person feel humiliated, degraded, to make them lose their self worth the yelling the screaming that is done the the cursing and vulgarities and so many men will not hit their wives, but their attitude is to obey. Their attitude is making the woman feel like she's worth nothing. And this is the textbook definition of emotional abuse and are shady as well forbids this. We are not allowed to treat a human being in this manner, much less our life partner, much less the mother of our children and SubhanAllah. What is really sad brothers and sisters is that all too often these people who abused their wives, they

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are the essence of hypocrites who have two faces. Many times when it comes to the masjid and the community, Masha Allah, they are sweet as honey, Masha Allah, they are the most generous and the most kind, but their friends and their extended family and their immediate family knows all too well. What happens behind closed doors, the people that should love him the most, and respect him the most, fear him the most and despise him the most. And that is why when you have such blatant hypocrisy, that is why our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, the best man amongst you is the one who is the best to his women and children.

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Because this is the essence of sincerity. If your wife can respect you, then will love you are worthy of being respected. If your wife who knows your inner secrets, and she knows exactly how you are, if she can vouch that this is an honest man, and our Prophet system had nine wives, and every one of them admired and respected him to the utmost, that is what you call a true gentleman. That is what you call a model of a lack of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. But when your wife and your children know you to be a fraud, then you are a fraud. Even if society puts you on a pedestal that is false. Now brothers and sisters, time is limited. There's only so much we can do. Obviously,

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brothers and sisters, a holdover is primarily meant for the husbands that abused their wives, because this is the common and the default and the norm in all societies and cultures, Muslim or non Muslim. And of course, before we finish the first quote, but we do have to point out that yes, the opposite is also held on even if it is a rare phenomenon, but it indeed does take place. And unfortunately, the reality as well is that some men, they are gentleman enough not to be physical or abusive, but then women take advantage of this. Women, our times become abusive, sometimes Believe it or not physical, and yes, even in this country, there are statistics, I don't have them in front

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of me. But there are cases of wives physically abusing husbands and the husband has been raised and raised in a good manner. So they do not raise their hand back. So they do not hit the woman. And instead they get suffered and they have physical, but then of course, emotional as well. And it is also the the the opposite applies, where sometimes women become emotionally abusive, when sometimes women become demeaning to the man and degrading of the man. And this is also something that the Sharia forbids. Now, the point of the whole debate is both abuse. But the reality is, generally speaking, it is the man who is abusing the woman. So that's why the main conversation took place

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there nonetheless, before we finished the first clip, but we have to point out that of course, the opposite is also held on the opposite also something that that the Sharia does not allow. And I conclude this first quote, by reminding ourselves that on the farewell of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, when he only had five paragraphs to address the entire room, the most important part of his life, addressed to the largest gathering of 100,000 people on the plane that is the holiest plane and on the day that is the holiest day and he barely has five paragraphs. he dedicates an entire paragraph to women, and he addresses men because once again typically it is the men who

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abused the women and he tells the men in law have ENISA fear a law when it comes to women. Fear Allah when it comes to women. Oh man, you will have to stand in front of a lot on Judgement Day. You think you have power over women? Allah has infinitely more power over you and you will have to stand in front of Allah and Allah will ask you how you dealt with your wife how you dealt with your children and our processes and reminded us It takes up a lot of in Nisa fear a lot when it comes to women because you took them by the permission of Allah and you made them happy.

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By the permission of Allah, in other words, it is a sacred contract. It is a covenant then it God is a covenant. It is an a god In the name of Allah and so Allah His name has been mentioned and Allah azza wa jal will ask you about that may Allah subhana wa tada allow us all to be the role model and ideal husbands and wives about a kilometer of foreign And all the while not finding what a yard can be male or female. It was declared Hakeem akoto matter smartone was tough for a lot of the muddy water come, what is the Muslim grudem infested guru in Whoo hoo, a lot of food or Rahim

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Alhamdulillah Hanwha hadn't had a summit a lady limited what a mula. mula Khufu and I had way back you can have the brothers move forward, we already are filled in the back. The question arises what should be done in light of this unhealthy and unholy phenomenon of spousal abuse? first advice to the victim. First and foremost, realize or sister in Islam or brother if you are the one in abuse, that Allah azza wa jal is a way that Allah is alcovy and that the one who is strong in the eyes of Allah is the one who is weak in the eyes of men.

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The weaker and the more oppressed you are, the stronger you are in the eyes of Allah, the two of them of loom of the one upon boom boom has been done is the strongest drop, so do not feel weak. While law he there is no one more powerful than the one upon whom vote has been done. And Allah will be on your side if boom has been done. So turn to Allah establish your relationship with Allah subhana wa tada and Allah azza wa jal will answer your drop. And always spirituality and a man is a great refuge, it's something that will be positive to the soul. Number two, do not blame yourself. One of the most common symptoms of spousal abuse is you start blaming yourself, maybe I deserve

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this, no, no by Allah. No one deserves to be beaten, no one deserves to be whipped, and, and hit in this manner. No one, stop blaming yourself. No matter what faults a person might have, it does not justify this type of torture and this type of abuse. And this is one of the symptoms of those who are abused and really recognize this that we need to overcome that symptom. Number three, if it is safe, and you only know if it is safe or not, then confront your spouse directly. Explain to them that this is not something that you will tolerate, remind them of Allah xojo and the Prophet sallallahu Sallam if it is safe to do so. And many times if it's something that is not that major,

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something trivial and they have some amount and taqwa insha, Allah to Allah that will be a good stopping for them and remind them of some of these ideas and ideas that I have mentioned. If it goes beyond this or if the situation is not safe, then you need to reach out to people whom you trust, extended family, extended friends, you need to reach out for help. If you cannot do this alone, then turn to those whom you trust. And if the situation crosses the red line, if you are genuinely fearful of your life of your physical safety, or the safety of your children, then will law he I tell you as a religious scholar, it is wajib to call some type of help, even if it is 911 Your life

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is more important than any suppose that honor. Or suppose that shame that you think you will bring to your family. Nothing is more sacred than your life. When it comes to these types of scenarios. If you feel your life is in danger, if you feel your children's life is in danger, then you need to seek help, even if it means the whole community knows and you're calling law enforcement to your house and in this country and land as you know, the law will be on your side in this issue and understand as well understand as well, that if you have such a person in your life and it is constant abuse and there is no change, whether it's emotional, whether it is physical, constant

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abuse, then think about ending this marriage, think about divorce. We have a stigma with divorce, that is an Islamic Islam does not place the stigma on divorce that we do. Divorce is not the end of the world. If you're in a marriage in which your partner is always demeaning, always putting you down. Then think about divorce after counseling after it's too hot. Obviously you don't have time in the hood. But that's not an immediate step. But think about it and put it on the table as an option. To be out of an abusive relationship and be free is better than to remain your life always being put down and demeaned, much less physically abused. And remember what Allah says in the Quran regarding

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divorce within the federal law

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All you need to pull them inside. If the two of them split up a law will take care of the both of them and supply them with what they need. Do not ever think that if I get divorced who will take care of me? Your husband did not take care of you Allah did your husband did not give you risk or Razak did. So if your husband is that abusive, and that demeaning, and you feel that there's no hope and you're afraid is too hot, have you spoken to family and friends and you realize that this marriage is not good for you, then perhaps contemplate and think about walking away so that you can preserve your dignity because that is more important than being married to somebody who is

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constantly belittling and humiliating you and brothers and sisters. I have to say as the the the the teacher and the chef of your community. And it is sad that in Memphis we do not have a center for for women who need help. Maybe our community is too small, larger Muslim cities, they they have Muslim shelter homes for women they have for battered and abused women for spouse some cases, maybe our community is too small, I don't know. But may I suggest and this is my responsibility as the person have some little bit of knowledge amongst you that even if we don't have a special house, even if we don't have a shelter, in sha Allah, we will all cooperate together. And we will help each

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other out what's our new eligibility with taqwa? And I say to all of our sisters and even the brothers because again, it is a both way street, that if you have no other option, this community is here for you. If all other avenues have been cut off, your family and friends don't seem to be able to help you then come to me and come to people you trust. And even though we don't have a house or something in sha Allah, we will work together and find a way find a way out because it is not allowed for us as a community to turn our backs on our sisters in need. It is Father keyfile. It is a communal responsibility on all of us that we come together and help out one of ours who is

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oppressed one of ours who is weak, and my advice to those who are committing the abuse. My advice to those who are the opposite side. Remember what Allah azza wa jal says in the Quran, wala tomb seek uno de la Lita do woman, deca for the volume and upset do not hold on to your wives only to cause them more harm. Because there are so many men, they get angry at their wives and they want to make their lives the wives lives a living hell. And Allah says in the Quran, if this is your Nia, woman, you have file radica for Cordova nafsa. Whoever does this, you aren't doing boon to your wife, you're doing boon to yourself, if the marriage is so bad, and if it is so negative, then partway so

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that there's a breath of fresh air for both of you. You don't have to remain married and inflict wounds and hardships on one another. And the last point to all of us as a community as a society that look this is our photo Tiki fire. It is our job to get involved in such marriages. It is our job to intervene when we see something going on. You know the slogan in New York if you say something, say see something, say something, it doesn't apply in a lot of those cases because they're invented up but in our community, we cannot turn a blind eye to such abuse. Next time you know of this scenario a situation in your extended family and friends intervene, man up, talk to

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that person tell him point blank Look, this is what we heard. Is this true or not? Or if you know it is true, tell him point blank How can you do this? bring about the pressure of social society stigma, do what you can. Our profits are seldom when Medina and Melissa long story I don't have time here. When he saw the marriage splitting apart. He intervened to try to bring them back together again, even though they didn't ask him to Now the point of the story for us. It is Hillel to intervene in a marriage to bring about a betterment. It is not just Helen, it's soon, our process of God involved in the marriage of two people, even though they didn't come to him for advice, because

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it's fun to give value. You want the marriage to last and flourish. So next time, you know of such a case in circumstance and it is in your extended family or friends. It is our communal responsibility to get involved and to have these deep and awkward conversations and make them know this is not going to be tolerated. That's the least that we can do. And brothers and sisters, if we are going to turn a blind eye, and we're going to ignore it, it is as if we are complicit in that abuse. It is as if we also have the shame and the stigma and the sin on our hands because we could have gotten involved and we did not get involved. Brothers and sisters. Marriage is supposed to be a blessing.

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Marriage is supposed to be assigned from a law, an idea from a law, the love and the mercy that couples have and this is the general rule and norm. Sometimes that doesn't work out if that doesn't work out.

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parked on good terms do not stay together to inflict loading and harm and suffering and emotional and physical abuse. Whoever does so as Allah says has only done boon to himself or herself. May Allah azza wa jal save us from any such type of wound Aloma in NIDA in for a mineral Lama that I never had the dubious M and a lot of Wanda Manila for Raja Wallah Dana. Later when Mr. de la Elijah feta when I see it on India softer allama fildena What is one interlinear server honorable man, what a few peruvianus Linda Linda Dena Amano robina in Nakuru for Rahim Allah is Islam all Muslim in Oklahoma is that Islamic and Muslim in Alabama is an Islamic Muslim in alarm and Aradhana are the

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Islamic Muslim enemies to a French girl who been upset with altijd mirabito bt Yakubu Aziz regards a law in the law to the American Babylon by the bbfc within the Malacca the hotel say we're thrilled that you have Luna manjinder he went insane for autism in college and idema in law home and equity Musa Luna nebby Yeah, you heard in amanu sallu la he was sending him with a slimmer allama suddenly will sell them were about equal an avocado silica Mohammedan while early he was like a big marine over the law in the Lucha tada yeah movie largely sunny wait a little over 100 Sasha it will moon Carnival belly

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Kuru Kuru la cama the Kuru. Kuru what are the Akbar was name is Sarah