Channel: Waleed Basyouni
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at Armani nemea de la Fernando De La Hoya Euclid Farah hodja. Wash Juana ilaha illallah wa, ala Sheree Kara wash Donna Mohammed Abu rasuluh Allahumma salli wa sallim wa barik ala nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa sallam Allahumma Sleeman kathira. Or that altar is due to Allah and His praise and blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, his family, his companions and his followers until his followers until the day of judgment, I bear witness at a loss The only one worthy of worship and Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, his last and final messenger. My dear brothers and sisters, I would like to speak to you about something that we all
involve, and we all do. But some of us more than others, more often than others, some of us do it
for various reasons, some of these things, major with others minor with with others, which is mistakes. Lisa minella, hurry up. And
it's not something uncommon that we talk about mistakes. Because if we talk about mistakes, we will find a huge amount of mistakes in front of us, we see it in ourselves and others and people around us, and organizations on the country, in the society, on the nation at large.
When we talk about human beings, we think of mistakes because in abhi sallallahu Sallam told us that part of the nature of human beings that human beings do mistakes in nibbly, Adam hapa khulumani Adam ohata all human beings make mistakes, and the best among them, those who repent from their mistakes. I'm talking about mistakes, which is intentionally done and categorized as something sin or wrong.
Can you add to this the mistakes that's done unintentionally, which is annex by accident, with the word mistake could refer to something you did it intentionally and you know, it's wrong, or something you did it unintentionally haba
the man will mohab run, I will help him Anna and Mr. Sood will find in front of us, as I said, a huge amount of things, and points to talk about. But I would like to pick something very specific about this topic today.
Since we all have mistakes, since we all see mistakes, so we all deal with mistakes. So regardless of it's our mistakes, or other people's mistakes, like your children, your spouse, your employees, your friends, your community, your country, and so forth.
I found that there is a lot of mistakes we do when we deal with our mistakes,
said like mistakes, time to
neck, Commedia Kabira minute.
Nevada, Hinata, Amman, Martha, Tina, I found out that we do a lot of mistakes when we deal with our mistakes. And I want to share a few of them with you. But before I start, I want to say that is not enough that you have a good intention. So for example, when you deal with somebody mistakes in the wrong way, it's not enough to say you know what, I want to make sure that my son raised in the best way, you know, my intention was correct when I did this to my spouse, or when I talk to my friends, when I talk to my community, know, good intention is good, but it's not good enough. We have also to add to it good, correct methods, and the way that we deal with our mistakes. And the first thing
that I would like to start with that if on so many times, that we try to ignore our mistakes, or other people's mistakes, and we kind of put our head in the sand and we think that these mistakes will go away by themselves. And many mistakes might some few will go away by themselves. But so many of them will not go away by themselves. Sometimes we don't want just to beat to face our mistakes. We keep delaying and delaying and delaying and we don't want to deal with it. And that's make the mistakes bigger and bigger and bigger. I think one of the first mistakes that we do that we try to avoid facing our mistakes, void that I'm talking about to ourselves about the wrong things that we
do, to admit our weakness to admit our mistakes to ourselves or even to pointed out and to speak
about it to others, we tried to run away from carrying the responsibility of these mistakes that we make. And the sin that we commit.
There is some people will refuse completely to receive any form of criticism, or corrections, or no say. So this organization or this user group, or this scholar, or this father will not be willing to listen to anything that point out some of his or her mistake.
You know, it's like this person who, you know,
you know, a guy was saying, I marry
a woman, and her, basically, her last name was right, but I didn't know that her first name was always
so, you know, and you can say this about men and woman, this kind of attitude that you're always right, it doesn't. It's not correct. It's not, it's not helpful. And so many times, you just see things wrong happening in your home, in your house, and you don't talk about it at all, you never talk about it. And that just trying to avoid it, and not to talk about it's not going to solve the problem.
I think it is the right for the Muslim upon each other is to given us so if I see someone doing wrong, and I never speak about it, I never told the person and I just ignore it. Because it's whatever justification for that. That's not correct. That's not how Nabi sallallahu alayhi Salaam envisioned the society to be, and we how we deal with one another
right to even
imagine haha Petia covered the trail, I will be traveling.
I found out that sometimes we correct mistakes by manava mistakes. So became double mistakes. I always say, you know what one mistake plus one mistake will never make one correct.
And so many times we don't, you know, we forget the simple formula, no matter how bad your math that's so easy to remember. One mistake plus one mistake will always equal what two mistakes it will never bring one correct. Sometimes we our reaction, we have reaction more than trying to fix the mistake, we just react to our mistakes. And in that process, especially if you get too excited what happened you make more mistakes and you complicate things. I warn you that when you see a mistake in yourself and other people that you can just react immediately to it without thinking without analyzing without thinking about the proper time and place and way of dealing with this mistake. For
instance, somebody felt you know what the chef's do they talk about for example night prayers and I got three octaves to this so excited and I go on and spend like Hours and hours making night prayers that I missed saw the video.
So what's the point from that? You know, or for example, somebody sees something wrong, his daughter not wearing the most appropriate hijab or she doesn't work a job to support so much pressure and get too excited and too aggressive then she said you know what, I don't want this religion at all.
Somebody we sometimes we break people and instead of correcting them
remember when the man and that's by the way apply to yourself sometimes the mistake you see yourself so you react you don't plan you don't take it graduate or you see it in others and you remember the story of the man who came in urinated in the mustard of the prophets of Allah and how to stop the companions from attacking him while he's doing that because it's going to create more problems
and individual Salah to remove leave him until he finished them advise him
then in the visa Salah explained to him that this cannot happen inside the mosque because by the way the mustard in the time the processor lamp because some of you might say how come the men will do that the most of the time the process is what has a front okay and quarter maybe 25% of it has a like kind of fruit or a ceiling Okay, then the rest are open and underside there is no wall.
Just region is it's like an open place. So people line up then later on they start extending these walls. So sometimes this is the man thought this is just an empty corner he can go in relieve himself
and that was just ignorant.
It is important for us to not to correct mistake with another mistake look
and this is very interesting because sometimes this is taking a shape of a methodology, you cannot help but help them energy is not just a mistake of an individual, sometimes a mistake of a group of
an ID ideology that people develop, that they see a mistake in the oma that they want to correct it. So the corrected with another mistake. And that mistake that the use of that methodology that they use can create more problem and give you an example, you see injustice happening in the world. So what will be the way to correct that is by, you know, going towards violence, and killing and hurting people. That's Yes, I see a mistake happening and justice happening in, in certain parts of the world. So what I do I do to correct the injustice by another injustice. That's wrong. You know, when you look at, for example, in history of Islam, some people get, see that the Muslim community
not involved in politics, or the Muslim world, politically not involved. They're not involved enough. So what they do, they get so excited, and they get overzealous about this. And they said, you know, what, everything should be put in hold. And everybody should just focus on one thing, which is, you know, being involved with politics, and push everything towards that. And other people see the Muslim amount ignorant so that you want everybody just to read books and not to focus on any other area in Islam. Some people looked at the debate between the fuqaha and the theologians. And that's a very common mistakes we see today that there is a group of Muslims look at the Muslim Ummah
and they found that the Muslim the Haha, debate with each other difference of opinions and whatever, then they looked at in theology, and then they say, this is bad, this is sin. And they said, you know, what calluna men can have
an Akita, out of the practice, practices as the Kalahari was, they said, you know, what, we don't want to deal with this we don't want to do to affect we're going to do what we did, we'll just provide
the deed of righteousness and just talk about spirituality. And, you know, be so passive, who cares about what governments do? Who cares about injustice, who cares about rights, you know, just make sure that we go out visibility, Lord, we just, you know, we became all brother and love one another. And that's enough. That's another reactions, another mistakes and dealing with a mistake.
Look at some people look at how people so involved in dunya, so attached to this worldly life, so what was the resolution, what was the solution for them, how to fix this mistakes, they became so ascetic in a sense, because a zoo to dunya is to leave the dunya. So you know, what you're not allowed to wear, you should not wear good clothes, you do this, you they ask you to avoid the world and live isolated from the world and leave even that lie behind you and just focus on one thing, which is some you know, rituals and vigor and self thing until we call them in our culture Darwish.
Just, you know, have nothing to do with the reality or the world, or it's completely devoted to us, in my opinion, it's an empty spirituality,
a deceiving type of spirituality, we should remember that always do not fix a mistake with another mistake. Another point number three, sometimes I noticed that there is a resistance
to correct mistakes openly. And there's a little bit I want you to pay attention to it. It's true that there are some mistakes should be dealt with privately 100% nobody disagree with that. But there are certain mistakes that should talk about it openly. We should stand up and raise our voice and said that's wrong. That cannot happen. Especially when it comes to the level of society and the level of community at large things happen openly, it should be talked about openly, not necessarily to talk about the individual. But even in certain times. You need to speak about the individuals who misleading people or caused great harm in society or in community and in that case, that should be
spoke about it openly. And there is a plenty of narrations from our from the time of the Sahaba of the law. And through history like that when people stand up for armor openly corrected Omar Oh to stand up and talk to more Elliot on the lower end or in the time of the tambourine. I will say hello and talk to
Marwan when he puts a lot to eat after the hot bath, or when the one of the hollowfibre raise his hand, to make one of the Sahaba, the alarm said, Put your hand down the spit out, that's not how you raise your we don't raise hands in the hotel Juma for the app, except for a list of spot. So you see that the talk the whole entire inherited, we inherit a big amount of books and statements and incidents with an LMS spoke openly about the leader of the Medtronic, the innovators and the people who misled the oma that time, talked about them openly. Sometimes we try to we get irritated, whenever we speak about problems in society openly. Like, for example, talk about drugs.
And we talked to hookless ago about the issue of drugs. No, no, don't talk about this issues. No, it is a problem. And we should speak about it openly, like about the lack of interest to stand up for the truth, that people just too scared.
You know, people don't have the carrot, don't have the zeal don't have the interest, to care for others.
Or to care for them. You know, talk about how we are in the business of losing losing when it comes to many projects that we do in our community, not sitting priority, correct, duplicating the work, the issue of domestic violence, the issue of for example, in these certain topics, people don't want to talk about racism,
that the problem that we have in our community, it is taboo, don't touch it, don't talk about. But if it became this issue has to be judged based on the Muslim. That's why leaders should take care of these issues, because there is a Muslim a greater benefit in going public or going in private or secret, or privately, or to how you address it in public. But the point that I want to make, that we unfortunately, so many of us, especially those who are raised overseas, we raised in a way that you're not allowed to speak about anything publicly. Everything hush hush, everything just to be not allowed to come out and to be spoken about why? Because we were unfortunately some of us raised
that. Talking about mistakes. It's an insult. Talking about mistakes. It's basically a personal attack on me. And that's not correct. That's not right.
Another problem that I see when it comes to mistakes, sometimes we are very ideal. We expect people to be ideal. 10 for example, you son making a mistake.
And I'm expecting my son to be a perfect son. You know she is he or she is only five years old. 10 years old, they are teenager, a teenager, you can expect them to be perfect.
I know son came to me in this mustard with tears in his eyes. He's the chair. I attended my half the Orion's graduation party. He memorized the whole Quran. It's not only that my father did not show up in the party. I came a little bit late it was 1130
he said the amount of abuse that I got that night and humiliation and names and things unbelievable.
And I wish that the father of that man is with us today. To hear me saying this.
But we expect him to be perfect. It's somebody so excited. So happy.
No he has to be perfect. And you know what? Because your son or your daughter is a students or religious a little bit you expect them to be hours perfect. Just because he's a chef. He cannot make a mistake.
He cannot do he cannot lose temper.
Just because he is a famous person he cannot make something wrong now. Just because you know and that's expect your wife to be just perfect and your husband to be perfect. That's just wrong. We cannot when we see people doing mistake we should not be you know we talked about but we should not expect them to be perfect. Because if we do that is not going to end how many mistakes we're going to find out.
Also, I found on the other side, there is a lot of people, not exaggerating that the correct the exaggerate the miss any
The excuses. So sometimes I found that one of the problem with dealing with mistakes, that we immediately find million excuses for ourselves
all the time. No matter your mistake, big or small, I always have I always have an excuse for it. And you know what? Sometimes I feel that you know what I'm, you know, I'm not guilty anymore. Just Why? Because I'm a human being. Like that day somebody says, I'm a human being. So what have you even been? At least admit your mistake, at least make sure that you make a promise effort to correct. So you human being it doesn't give you all the process? Is that the best among you that make mistakes? So let me just keep doing it. No, it's not. You know what, I'm just young, and I have a desire. Now that's not excuse. You know, my wife doesn't talk to me, my husband doesn't take care
of me. So it doesn't give you the excuse to go date someone else.
You know, it doesn't give you the excuse to continue doing the mistake. Sometimes we just do that. Imagine if you break the light. And the police stop you and said, Sarah, you just you know, committed a violation. Yes, Officer, but I'm a human being, you know, I make mistakes. Yeah, sure. Tell that the judge.
You know, sometimes we say it is him or her the reason for my mistake.
I think we should be balanced, when it comes not to expect people to be perfect. But also not to be just finding excuse for every mistake that we make.
I found sometimes one of the mistakes we do when we deal with mistakes, that the standard we have for mistake is something something very weird. Sometimes we say
to anything that is you're not familiar with wrong mistakes, not correct. Something that's not part of your own culture or the way you raise that's not, you know that they a couple talking to me. And he said to me, You know what, this is just wrong the way she should deal with me, why have you? He said, You know how my mother used to treat my father, but your mother is not the standard for you. And that's not how the standard is.
You know, in my time how used to do this, yeah, but your time is not the standard for others. Or sometimes the standard is the opinion of a chef. So if my chef says this, that's how the standard I hold you to it. Or, for example, my culture or my mother or my group or my, you know, whatever the way I was raised out, that's not the standard for defining what's right and what's wrong.
aska las panatela iluminado Steena
hamdu Lillah wa salatu salam ala Nana Viva.
Also we have to understand that there are certain things done you might see throng but other people see it as something correct. And that's what we call massage, Tara finished the hat, when we have a difference of opinions will have a different, you know, views to things and we should deal with these things that I considered mistakes with a, you know, sold grain, a grain of salt. And in another word, you can advise you can express your opinion but don't attack. Don't say you're wrong, you're wrong. This is you're faster, you're wrong, and you make a judgment You know, sometimes just a difference of opinion. And you have to respect that I think even among spouses.
If your wife or your husband choose one opinion over another you cannot force your opinion over her or over him. Unless this is something the house cannot function without it. And this case you have to agree on something. But in the end of the day, like sometimes between even to massage to groups to issue to individuals, if there is a difference of opinions among the issue, you are allowed to advise her
but just don't attack. There is a famous Dyer,
the founder of a very famous group in our modern history hasn't been around him a lot. He said something he said we should work with each other in the area that we agree with each others upon
but we should excuse one another in the area we disagree on. Can Chevron Albania Rahim Allah, Jamil kalama. Or Shana la vida Himalaya is a very beautiful comment on the statement. He said this statement is incomplete and it should be completed by adding called niteowl Viva La
When we disagree with each other, we should advise one another we just said don't say excuse one another holiday and you doing wrong and I don't talk about it. Now we can advise one another and we can keep the friendship but if I see you doing something wrong, I just don't be quiet. I say hey, this is wrong. This is against the sun. This
need to be corrected? This is 100 sorry, this is a weak narration, you can be doing that. That's an opinion but it is not correct for 123 I don't force my opinion upon you, but I give you that advice. And it's up to you you take it or not, but for the oma to be complicit to be just silent, not the speaker not to give advice one another. That's not acceptable. That's not a society that we want one a society to learn how to respect one another when we disagree with one another, but we have to have that room and ability and trust in one another to speak up to give that advice and the proper way
malice parameter Anna and you know you're coming up higher on your Ivanova yakushima summit and a lot more about you know why Nina Latina, una de man ratafia khudobin Avila Latina Aminu Allahumma salli wa sallim wa barik ala nabina Muhammad Allahumma salli wa sallim wa barik ala nabina Muhammad, aloha mo for him at a motel a la Mishima, Ivanova muslimeen. Allah Mohammed Al Rahim Allah for Allah Allah Deena
Deena carrapateena Amina Melo upon Elena Alonso de novo Mina frequently McCann Allah masala novel Amina Fukuda McCann, only for Cora and I have Nia in a de la la la la la la la la la la de Macedo, Metallica Barack Obama if he had the agenda to Jelani, a cron fi movie movie Amalia model was up to him. Why agility more agility more pharmacann Dr. Aphra yahaya salam, wa Sallim wa barik ala nabina, Muhammad akumina Satya from you