Riyadh al-Saliheen and Women’s Q&A #10

Tom Facchine


Channel: Tom Facchine


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This one

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of hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa Salatu was Salam. Ala Ashraful MBI. Even more serene NaVi nama Courvoisier Muhammad Ali he offered a Salah Eska Tasneem Allahumma and MW may inverno. unfashionably be my island and I was even there element, yellow banana mean.

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We were just concluding last class the sixth Hadith of the first section of riobel Salah Hain

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which this hadith was narrated by side, even though we walked past him and talked about his biography and his life and his times,

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a quick recap of the Hadith. He gets sick after, during the 100 with that, when the first hygiene the only hedge that the Muslims would make with a profit on Esau to Sudan, and he was afraid that he was going to die. So he was, as far as he knew, on his deathbed, and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam came to him.

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And he asked the Prophet alayhi salatu salam, if he could give away half his wealth, or more, actually, he starts by asking two thirds of his property and wealth and charity, as I will see.

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And the promise I sent him says no, and then he says, What about a half? And he says, No, and then he says, What about a third and he says, okay, but even that is too much. It's better to leave your inheritors, or your heirs

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well off than it is to leave them beggars.

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And then sad, asks the prophesy said, um, if he's going to die,

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and the prophesy suddenly says, No, you're not, you're going to live a lot longer, and you're going to be a benefit to the ummah.

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And then, at the very end,

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the prophesy son, it makes it a duet for him. And he says, oh, Allah complete for my companions, their emigration their heads up, and do not cause them to retract.

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Allahumma m li li, US hobby, here's Roger home. What I titled do home,

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And then the narrator, which is sad, he says that this is a reference to somebody else.

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His name was another side Assad in Hola.

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Who was unfortunate because he passed away while he was in Mecca.

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We'll talk about that in a second shot, we ran through many of the filat and many of the benefits of this hadith, we talked about the importance of intergenerational wealth building, right, making sure that your inheritors are well off.

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And the one of the best ways to do that is through a living will, making sure all of your

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assets and finances get divided up in an Islamic way. Right, which is something that is on you, it's not the government's not going to do it for you in this country, you have to kind of take care of it ahead of time, either by consulting with someone who knows inheritance law, or by using any of the online services like my wistia.com, in order to have a living will, that's going to divide up your inheritance in the proper way. We also talked about the importance of having an LLC about giving away some of your wealth in charity, and that one of the best ways to do that is through some sort of sadaqa jariya. And one of the best ways to do that, and this was a practice of the companions,

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and the setup was to leave something for the machine, because the machines would use it in a way that would benefit believers for years and years and years to come. So that is something to keep in mind.

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We talked about

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the preference of

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taking care of the people directly around you. Right when the prophesy centum instructs him that it's better to leave your your heirs or your inheritors well off, right, this is a principle in Islamic law and in Islamic finance, about taking care of the people around you first. And we talked about how is the cat's law in particular, so cat is different from sadaqa, because specifically is a cat has to do with minimizing the class differences in an Islamic community or a Muslim community and squashing,

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cutting off any sort of resentment that the poor of your community feel towards the rich of your community. So giving you as a cat locally is extremely important. Are there other places around the world that have more need? Yes, that's true. But when it comes to the cat, there are other considerations that are more specific than sadaqa. So please do continue to

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To give sadaqa to places all over the world, the places that need them. We have a lot of Muslims that are suffering right now. But as a cat, the vast majority of scholars say that it's preferable to give you as a cat host a home within your community.

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The last point or the last two points that we didn't get to talk about, have to do with the very end of the Hadith. So sad brings up this other person.

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Another side Souderton holder who passed away in Mecca. And sadly one of your thoughts was kind of fearful of kind of ticking after this guy. Why? Because we've said in other lessons, how much of an emotional toll it was for the companions to leave Mecca, the MaHA Joon and go to Medina and live they left behind not only their property and their land,

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but their family, their memories, the place that they were familiar with their people, their culture. Many people in our community can relate to this sort of emotional state. emigrating to another country is not easy, adjusting to different cultural expectations is not easy.

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And so

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even after the fact,

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after the conquest of Mecca,

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the mohajir owner did not want to move back to Mecca.

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That was how strong their Eman was, and how much they prioritized their faith. They wanted to die in Medina.

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Medina was the place that had accepted them. They had established Islam there, while Mecca continued to fight them.

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So this is sods worry that he's back visiting Mecca just to make hij. And he's worried that he's going to die in Mecca instead of Allah Medina.

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Which is why the prophesy said I made the DUA he made. May you complete the Hijra from my companions. Don't

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let them kind of lose their zeal get overcome by this kind of nostalgia and familiarity,

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and just go back to what they were doing.

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And so Saad gets his wish. But there was another companion by the name referenced here, Sodom and Hola, who had returned to Mecca

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before the conquest, because he missed it so much. And he died there. And it was considered something that was regrettable the prophesy said I'm he says it himself. He says what happened to him was unfortunate. The nostalgia and the reminiscing about those things that were familiar overcame him. And so he prioritize those things over over living in a place where he could better practice his Deen he prioritize those things over being able to live next to the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam himself

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and so he died in Mecca. And so the status of his hijra, what was the intention? how sincere was his Hijra? kind of came into question.

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This is what Saad was trying to avoid.

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He didn't want to have any question as to the validity or the sincerity

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of his Hijra. He wanted to be able to return back to Medina healthy and he did.

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So this shows us the priorities of the companions that no matter what attachment to there, anything in this world, their culture,

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their land, their property, their relationships, their family, anything.

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The relationship to the dean

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took priority over that.

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And the last thing, and this is goes without saying that when Saad, when he was in his illness, he he reported his ailments of the prophesy setup. Right? We could say he complained about it. But these sorts of things are permissible. There's nothing wrong with that you complaining about the suffering that you're experiencing, is not the same as despairing. In the Mercy of Allah, right? We have to draw a distinction between the two. He's saying I'm in pain, Allah so Allah, make dua for me. Do something for me, help me please. Because I'm in a lot of pain I'm in I'm suffering. There's nothing that

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intellectual or reliance upon Allah to express these sorts of things. This is what people are feeling. It's not like he's saying, Why me? Oh Allah, why did you choose me this isn't fair. Oh, I wish that I were this, if only.

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Right. So there's a difference between the two, sometimes, sometimes in our

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zeal or quickness to want to

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reaffirm or encourage people to be grateful to a lot. Sometimes we stopped them from having any emotions in the first place. The second someone starts to share a pain that they're having, or a suffering that they're going through.

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We say Oh, well, you need to thank Allah.

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Right? I'm guilty about of this, I do this all the time.

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The Prophet SAW I sent him

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he didn't stop him. He didn't say, don't complain, you're gonna be he actually made him feel better by addressing his concern is like, don't worry, you're going to get better. And you're going to be able to return to Medina and you're going to live out the rest of your life and it's going to be it's going to be good. Of course, he knew this because he was given that revelation. But he didn't stop him in his tracks and try to say wait a second, you're not relying upon a law in the right sort of way.

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So that concludes the sixth Hadith. The next Hadith we have the seventh Hadith

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we have on the authority of Abu Hurayrah which is our first Hadith in this book from Abu Hurayrah I will hold Ira has the most he's number one minimal theory he's at the top of the companions when it comes to the amounts of Hadith he narrated from the prophesy seven

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How many did he marry? There's some sort of difference of opinion some said 3000 and that had been his CEO he says 5000 or more than 5000

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But needless to say it was a lot

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does anybody know ever heard it was real name ever heard it was just a Kanye?

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to be more accurate

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what's his actual name?

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Asante Yes, Mashallah. Very good. I'm going off man in the suffer. dosi. There is some say that there is some difference of opinion as to what his actual name was some say Abdullah. There's other narration, but the majority, they say that his name was on the roadmap. And as his name indicates that dosi that's the tribe name. He comes from Yemen,

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technically a place called a CF, which is

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today's geography on the border between Yemen and Saudi Arabia. But in that time, it was called Yemen.

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And he was an orphan. His father had passed away all he had, he had no sisters, brothers, all he had was his mother. He accepted Islam in Yemen, because the chief of his tribe to fail even our also accepted Islam, so he responded to the call of his local chief and he became a Muslim. However, he did not migrate to Medina until the seventh year, after the hijra, which is considerably late. This is the year of the Bible of Hiva.

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He was 28 years old when he migrated.

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After the prophesy son passed away,

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he fought alongside Abu Bakr in the riddle wars, and he fought alongside Omar during his field alpha in the conquest of Persia. Eventually Ahmad will make him governor of Medina and he stayed in Medina and taught Hadith of the Prophet SAW Saddam until his death.

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If you read anything

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from Orientalist scholars about Abu Hurayrah

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they really don't like I will hold on to very much

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because a lot of the Sunnah a good good good portion of the Sangha comes through alcohol writer.

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So you find the many many Shubho hats

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that are mentioned about Abu Hurayrah doubts, insinuation insinuations

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trying to dis credit him as a narrator of Hadith

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If I can share the screen with you for a moment, if you don't mind. I actually came across this just today while looking up some points about his biography. I looked up the Wikipedia article in Arabic and then I looked up what they had to say in English. So I'm going to just share this with you here.

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Yes, my desktop is very messy. You can tell I'm one of those guilty people that has a million tabs open.

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From here,

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we have reliability as Hadith source. It says although credited with over 5000 Hadith, this is that hubbies estimation

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elbow Hadees biography of the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam noted that Abu Hurayrah was a minor companion, and a late converts to Islam, who spent only approximately two years and three months in the company of the Prophet it has sought to set up

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in contrast to should be Abu Hurayrah. Prophet Muhammad's closest companions are credited with far less Hadith. Abu Bakar is credited with 142 Earth men and men are found with 146 or not even a hotdog with 537 and only with 586. This discrepancy between attributed Hadith and abulhool writer as minor role and limited time with a Prophet alayhi salatu salam has been called into question by a number of scholars who argue that abulhool writers accounts are unreliable sources

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of Hadith

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scholar Abdullah Saeed on this occasion points out that I'm not even a kebab during his tenure as Khalifa threatened Abu Hurayrah on a number of occasions with banishment due to his frequent misquoting of the prophets whereas on a Hisa lots of Siddha

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during his lifetime a bull writer was noted as a blatant self promoter etc etc.

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So these are these sorts of doubts that are very common okay.

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They're brought up with a little bit I'll show you the move here just because this is I think kind of important. They start out with a source that everybody can agree on elbow hottie I will call it says that I will hold I only spent so much time with the prophesy setup. Then they compare the numbers 142 146 Okay.

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Then they quote They quote somebody else who was an Orientalist scholar that claims that this means that he is unreliable. Okay.

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What is one of the problems with this is that

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Allah Buhari

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and Abu Bakr and Earth man and Amara and Ali do not share the conclusion of this Orientalist scholar.

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They had no problem with Abu Bakr. If we go to the Arabic page, we'll find direct responses to these arguments. But I'm showing all of you to show you kind of how the Western world and the Western Academy kind of pokes holes and sews doubts into our religion, especially your children might go online and read a biography of Abu Hurayrah. And they're going to come across these sorts of doubts. Whereas here, for example, we have I'll translate it for you.

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What did the actual companions say about Abu Hurayrah Abdullah bin Omar said

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I'll call a level that he said to everyone on contour Arizona, the Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam the writer was the one who stuck with him the most and the most knowledgeable about Hadith.

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And then

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carob said that he didn't see a man

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that didn't read the Torah, but knew more about it than anybody except for Abu Hurayrah. We have other examples down here. If anybody READS ARABIC, I'll, you know, just be brief to kind of summarize things. But you don't find that the companions had the same issues that the English sources are insinuating the companions had.

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Right. There are several several examples of people trying to

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catch a whoohoo writer or test him only to find out that he was exactly what he said he was that he was an extremely reliable narrator. And he had near unanimous support from all of the companions and the tabby rain and the scholars after them.

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So I don't want to take up too much of the class time with this. We have some issues about marriage that we said we will get to but

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Maybe I can summarize what a couple of things here. For example,

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there was a few times when I will hold writer was accused of maybe

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saying too much things that he didn't know.

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And then others companions stepped in and defended him saying that, in reality, even though Abu Hurayrah accompany the prophecies on him for a relatively short time, every writer was different from the rest of the companions,

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Abu Bakr, and Irma, and Isley, they all had families to take care of. They all had business, they all had farms and trade and these sorts of things that kept them busy. Whereas I will who writer by the law Haoran, he was constantly with the prophesy centum every minute, practically, except for the times where the prophesy, Saddam was having private, intimate moments with his spouses for the duration of his time with the prophesy setup. So all of these sorts of doubts, they're just kind of insinuations.

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Anyway, we don't we didn't get to the heavy today, because it's halfway through the class. And I promised you that we would start to talk about the fifth of marriage, the fifth of Nica, and we started talking about it last class.

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And we will continue today. So last class, we talked about

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the overall structure of studying mica studying marriage,

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and how the first part that we were going to study, the first section of it was having to do with everything leading up to the kneecap, the engagement, what you're allowed to see, and we talked about what you're allowed to see other prospective spouse, her face her hands, some set her feet, and what's normally what can't be hidden, right, such as the shape of the body underneath a normal Jitterbug, or garment or something like this.

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So, and we said that this is important, because a lot of our convert sisters get taken advantage of, they become Muslims, and then they're looking to get married. And people asked to see inappropriate things of them.

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And so they need to know that in

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Islamic law, this is not an appropriate thing.

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To have happen that you don't have to show anybody anything. When it comes to your to your marriage, people are not entitled to see things that you wouldn't normally show

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anybody else

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for the sake of marriage.

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Then we talked about what we will be getting into today, which are MUJI bed sets Anika the things that make a marriage contract valid. And it's going to approach things from three angles. One is a theater locked, how does one make a marriage contract in the first place? The second is shooter locked, what are the prerequisites the things that have to be part of a marriage contract in order to be valid. And then we have Mahela locked, or millennia and the calf which are the things that kind of can come in and invalidate

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a marriage contract. One thing we didn't talk about yesterday, and one of the sisters actually messaged me in private to bring this up,

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is that sometimes sometimes there's a lot of pressure to get married, we're talking about convert sisters, just because convert sisters tend to be taken advantage of more than our other sisters who have a whole kind of Muslim family. A lot of people, when you become a if a woman becomes a convert to a snap, the first thing that we say to do is this by that time you get married,

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And a lot of times

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this person is still kind of growing in their faith.

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They might not be ready to get married yet.

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Actually, they often are not married or not ready to get married yet. So this issue returns to what is the ruling of getting married in the first place? How come in Nikka is Nika? Something that is wedge ID

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or phone so that it has to be done? And so it's on a phone and it has to be done as soon as possible?

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Or is it something that's mobile? Is it something that's most the hub? Is it something that it could be all of these things depending on the situation? And the majority of scholars say that it's the last answer that this that marriage is something that it could have all five rulings, it could be forbidden. It could be wedge it, it could be MOBA, depending on the

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particular situation that person is in.

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So if somebody, for example,

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is on the verge of committing sin Jani is Xena.

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And they, the only way for them to

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not commit this sin is by getting married, then it's magical upon that person to get married.

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However, if someone's about to get married or considering getting married to somebody who

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doesn't pray,

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is known to

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abuse people physically

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is going to has stated that they are going to

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maybe leave Islam. Or if they have kids, not raise them as Muslims, marrying this type of person is haram. It's not allowed. So you can imagine all sorts of different scenarios. So we can't go up to a new convert and say, sister, you have to get married? No, that's not true. You have to look into the particulars of her situation, not you, me, or whoever else is Imam or in the McAllen Imam has to look into the particulars of that person's situation and say, Okay, does this person are they ready to get married, I would, in general suggest

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to people who convert to not make any big life decisions for the next two or three years. Because it's not like people accept this now and then become completely different people, you have people who are entering Islam with addictions, drug addictions, history of abuse,

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with non Muslim relatives, that they're still kind of negotiating

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their relationships with these people. They're not accustomed to being Muslims yet. So often, often, it's actually and I'm not saying this is every case, no, there's lots of successful cases of sisters who

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converted and got married at the same time. But with a lot of sisters

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waiting actually will benefit them, it will cause them to get more comfortable as a Muslim more regular in their a bad and in their practice, they have more of a reliance to local and town look, they have a relationship with Allah, and so they'll be in a better situation to be married in a short amount of time inshallah. So that was something someone brought up to me I thought was worth mentioning.

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Today, we're going to touch on a couple, we're going to crossover into

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K theater acts, how does the marriage contract happen and all the sorts of issues that come along with it?

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I haven't been going into every issue I've only been taking the ones that I think are particularly relevant for this time in place United States of America, Utica 2020.

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So there's other things that have to do with evolve and that's it and I could be headed any kind of like what are the words that you have to say a lot of these things I'm going to skip over.

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The first issue comes that comes in that I think is relevant to us is eligible.

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Does the father have the right to force

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his daughter to get married

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What do you think?

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I'll throw it to you guys. Yeah.

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Okay, we have two notes. Mashallah, good.

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I'm going to give you the Mahal

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ittefaq While Mahajan is up, okay. So there's one issue here, where the Scott all of them said the same thing. And that is if a woman is theum

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meaning that she has some sort of experience

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either she has been married before

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or something similar and this is also has a different key that then there is age.

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There is consensus that nobody can force her to get married.

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And this is because of the explicit statement on the profit side Santa Fe will have Kobe Neff see her meanwhile the year

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okay, there is

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is a difference of opinion. And I'm not telling I'm not saying this to be controversial, but I'm trying to arm you all with information. So if somebody comes to you, this isn't a surprise, when it comes to a girl who is a virgin, who has never been married before, has no sexual experience, there is a difference of opinion. I'm going to explain to you the difference of opinion so that you understand it, and so that you can respond to people

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engage you in this sort of conversation.

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So the official opinion

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of Abu Hanifa and the Hanafi madhhab. Is that it is never

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okay. It's not permissible for a father to force his daughter to marry.

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Okay, she has to have with law, she has to have her consent. Oh, that's a good one. Thank you, Anna secret and a cat valid? That's a good question. We'll get there. Inshallah.

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The more attended the official opinion of the other three schools

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is that if the woman is barely

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if she is a woman, she's past puberty,

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then the father is allowed to force her to get married to get her married without her consent. Okay. What's their evidence?

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What's their evidence? Their evidence is what's called My fallen Mafalda or the latest report.

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When the Prophet Muhammad Ali Salam said that hadith I just mentioned,

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a fable a hacker will be enough see her. Meanwhile, YHA that a woman who has been married before, who has sexual experience is more rightful has more of a right to herself, then then her wealthy and her guardian.

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So the other side opinion number two, they're saying, well, that implication from this hadith

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is that

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if she's not sexually experienced, if she hasn't, if he has been married, assuming if she has not been married before, then she is not more rightful to herself.

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You follow along? We're not passing judgment. I'm just going to put it all on the table for you.

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The other side side, one response. They respond to this.

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And they said okay, but there is a rewire of the same Hadith recorded in Sahih Muslim where then the prophesy centum said

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while vicar yes that they know how boo have enough see her

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and the virgin or the woman who has no sexual experience, she is asked her in her opinion. They also use the Hadith where the prophesy southern said that the even the permission

00:33:11--> 00:33:21

of the virgin or someone who hasn't been married before is her silence. Right? A well known Hadith. And then they further

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support this argument by the actions of the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam

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that there was an Jetty a 10 bit Quran asset in Nabi SallAllahu, alayhi wa sallam, there was a girl, a young girl that came to the prophesy center.

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And she complained to the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam

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that her father had married her against her will.

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And the prophets of Allah, Allah Salam gave her the decision.

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If you want to stay, stay, if you want divorced, you're divorced.

00:33:58--> 00:34:14

So what we have here, just so you understand how fake works, right? We have here an explicit statement of the prophesy Center. On this aside one that says no, the father cannot force his daughter to marry whether she's

00:34:15--> 00:34:21

experienced or not. explicit statement of the province is no explicit action of the province.

00:34:26--> 00:34:30

And then on this side, who say that, yes, you can.

00:34:31--> 00:34:32

You have an

00:34:34--> 00:34:38

implication something that's implicit from a statement of the province is

00:34:39--> 00:34:59

something that's the implication of which is is actually contradicted by one of these explicit heavy. So if we're looking at these two, which one seems more convincing to you? I'll say what seems more convincing to me. And what I would tell people if they came up to me in the MSG,

00:35:00--> 00:35:08

or, you know, in the United States of America, can a father marry off his daughter without her consent? No, I don't believe that he can.

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But I can't lie to you and tell you that there's not a difference of opinion about it. But now I've armed you with the information to be able to have this discussion with somebody, if they tried to have it with

00:35:26--> 00:35:28

a related question, we said.

00:35:31--> 00:35:55

Okay, I'll try to I'll respond to this question really quick. But then we're going to get into it next week. Because next week, we explicitly deal with the concept of Wilaya. And a shahada, right, like the prerequisites of a marriage contract? Do you have to have a Willie? And if so, what type of Wali? And can he lose his Wilaya? Can he lose his ability? His guardianship?

00:35:56--> 00:36:07

Do we have to have witnesses? What counts as witnesses? Do we have to announce it these sorts of things? Short answer to Hana is a secret and valid. No. Short answer is no.

00:36:09--> 00:36:11

But we'll get into that in more detail later.

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We said that

00:36:17--> 00:36:19

the scholars differed over

00:36:24--> 00:36:28

is a father able to force or marry off his daughter

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without her permission against her will.

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And we said that the scholars they made a differentiation between a three UVA, which is having kind of sexual experience or being married before and not. And that if you have had sexual experience, or you had been married before that there's no discussion that there is edge math, if

00:36:53--> 00:37:16

that everybody says you are more entitled, nobody can tell you what to do. It's all up to you. So a related question is what counts? What counts as this type of experience? Doesn't have to be Newcastle. He doesn't have to be a valid marriage contract and Islamic law. What if someone's a convert to Islam who just had boyfriends and girlfriends before Islam?

00:37:18--> 00:37:19

What they have experienced through that?

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This is split down the middle between the four schools.

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The school of Abu Hanifa and Malik say that the type of experience we're talking about here is only through a valid kneecap is only through a kneecap in the understanding of Islamic law. Whereas the other two

00:37:44--> 00:37:47

the school Shafi and Efrain

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Rahim Allah, is that we're talking about any experience whatsoever?

00:37:54--> 00:37:59

Doesn't matter how valid marriage invalid marriage, it doesn't matter.

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Running out of time here. Last issue we'll talk about for the day. And anybody else have any questions? Please either send me a message or put it in here in the chat box, we've got less than a minute before it shuts off.

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Is there such thing as being able to delay your response? Let's say that there's a proposal, you say like, wait a second, let me think about it, you go home, then you come back and you say tomorrow, okay? The answer is yes.

00:38:34--> 00:38:49

Is the marriage done like that? Or does the groom have to make a proposal a second time? This is an issue of a lot of differences of opinion between the scholars. Even I'm a chef and he said that? No, every time.

00:38:50--> 00:38:55

If there's going if they're going to separate, the groom has to make a new proposal every single time.

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I will Hanifa Rahim Allah. He said, No, that this is permissible. The woman can go away and think about it for a week, a month, no problem and then give a response and then the marriage is done. Malik and ashmit said in between if there's a small amount of time, then it's permissible it counts and if