The Muslim Family #09 – An Interactive Session for You and Your Family P1

Tim Humble

Date:

Channel: Tim Humble

Series:

File Size: 20.24MB

Episode Notes

Share Page

Transcript ©

AI generated text may display inaccurate or offensive information that doesn’t represent Muslim Central's views. Thus,no part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.

00:00:00--> 00:00:04

What are kulu filco Ronnie Naja E

00:00:05--> 00:00:16

to carry Moosa Lu wa colocar La La, la de la Lu, while Mustafa de

00:00:17--> 00:01:08

leeuw and hungry hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah Nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi edge mine a Salah morally equal more metal law he wabarakatuh All praise is due for Allah alone. And we ask a lot to exalt dimension and grand peace to our messenger Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam to his family and his companions. Welcome to another installment in the short course brought to you by El madrasa to the Maria on the topic of the Muslim family. In this video in sha Allah, I would like to do something a little bit different. First of all, what I want to do in this video is kind of to finish up the previous discussions to kind of tidy up any

00:01:08--> 00:01:50

unfinished things that we had mentioned that we hadn't gone into detail, or a Heidi thought I had mentioned, or I had mentioned, and I had said, we will deal with this later on. There were a few of them as I was going back through the videos, so I gathered them together, and I added a few more also from other sources. So inshallah Allah, it's a little bit about just finishing up our discussion, and concluding our discussion on the original topic, which we talked about briefly, the Muslim family, and then marriage, the characteristics of the husband and the characteristics of the wife. So we're just finishing up and concluding what we had spoken about. But I want to not only to

00:01:50--> 00:01:54

conclude, but also to make this a little bit more interactive.

00:01:55--> 00:02:39

And what I'm going to do is for every Hadeeth, or is that I mentioned, I'm going to ask you to pause the video, and for you, yourself, or the people who are watching at home with you to discuss and to think about where this hadith or the ayah fits in, in terms of the discussion that we have had in the previous sessions, and try to understand some of the benefits that can be taken from it. And then I will tell you where I think it fits in and some of the benefits I took from it. And when it comes to taking benefits from Hadeeth. And it is very possible that you're going to think of if you're going to think of benefits from these eight and a Hadeeth that I didn't think of and that's

00:02:39--> 00:03:27

absolutely fine in sha Allah who to Allah so nothing to worry about if you come up with slightly different answers, as long as they are Sharla broadly, you know, within the meaning of the Heidi's are broadly valid. So we're going to start in sha Allah to Allah with our first Hadith and Ayesha graviola and her colleagues Kadima, Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam University tabuk, Ohio, where he said what he has Citroen for head battery home fracture partner here to sit and then actively I shall call Maha Aisha harlot burnetii, wa abena hoonah philos and level Jana Hani millrock min Ria call for call Mahathir led era was the one call it false color woman her the lady

00:03:27--> 00:03:40

Ali color Jenna Han color photo soon level Jana Han call it msme Etta and nanny Sulayman a Highlander Neha call it follows botica had a tune our Gita.

00:03:42--> 00:04:20

Our first Heidi The Heidi's of our mother, Ayesha are the Allahu taala and her Ba, in which she said the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and this highly by the way is narrated in sunon Abbey doubt that the Prophet sighs lm came from Cosmo tabuk or lazada hybl. And in the store area, the area where I used to store her things, there was a curtain covering that the store room or the store cupboard, the store area where I used to keep her things, and a wind blew the curtain away. So it exposed some of the things that were in the cupboard.

00:04:21--> 00:04:46

And it acts one of the things that it showed the privatizing it caught his eye is that there were some figures or dolls that belonged to Ayesha that she was playing with some toys that she was playing with. Now, here we want to be very clear, and we're going to mention a shout out to Allah and His subsequent Hadeeth to be really clear here, that this is not the permissibility of keeping all kinds of

00:04:47--> 00:04:59

things with faces and Barbie dolls and you know, things like that. That's not the meaning here. And we're going to hear very clearly in a subsequent Heidi's, the limits and the restrictions that exist on this. But what we say is in short, Lolita

00:05:00--> 00:05:12

And the sort of balanced opinion on this is that what Ayesha had is she had very rough, sort of ragdoll kind of figures without faces without proper facial features.

00:05:14--> 00:05:58

And it belonged these these dolls, they belong to Ayesha, she would play with them or she used to play with them before. And the Prophet sighs him said, What are these are our issues she said, these are my my Bennett. Bennett means my daughter's my dolls. And in the middle of them, there was a horse and the horse it had two wings made of leather. The prophet SAW Selim said, What is that I see in the middle of the of the dolls. She said, it's a horse. He said, What's this on the horse? She said, it's got two wings. The Prophet size him said a horse with two wings, a horse with two wings. She said, didn't you hear that? So a man had horses with wings? She said, the prophet sighs I'm

00:05:58--> 00:06:12

laughed. And when we say he laughed, it means that he smiled because he never laughed out loud. solahart he was saying to make noise when he laughed. He smiled or he laughed, until I saw his molar teeth. I saw the back of his teeth.

00:06:13--> 00:06:43

So the prophet SAW Selim here, he smiled when he heard what Arusha said are the Allahu taala. and pause the video and ask yourself where does this Heidi fit into our discussion? Is the Ideal Husband, ideal wife, Muslim family, what the general topic of marriage or the concept of marriage in Islam? Where does it fit in? And what are some of the benefits in on on the topics we've been discussing? As it relates to the Muslim family that you can take from this hadith?

00:06:44--> 00:07:21

So inshallah to Allah you pause the video and inshallah to Allah you had a good thing about that. I actually, first of all, put this Hadeeth the topic of the Ideal Husband, because to me, it just shows the excellent way the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam used to be with Ayesha and with all of his wife Salatu was Salam or LA, one of the Allahu anhu May Allah be pleased with them all. In May our lives will exalt dimension in Grand peace to our messenger Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So beautiful way that I showed the alarm on her, how she used to be how the prophets I seems to be with her. So you see the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam here. First of all, not

00:07:21--> 00:08:07

everything is serious. We know the Prophet sites and had a very, very, in fact, no one had a more serious and a more weighty and a bigger responsibility in their role in life than our messenger, Mohammed Salalah. While he was still he asked Ayesha was this was this in the middle? And then he had that kind of soft and almost a little, not even a joke. I think the word jaw can be misunderstood because a lot of times people lie when they're joking and things. But that kind of light hearted conversation with Ayesha when he says, Does a horse have two wings? And she said, Don't you hear that. So a man had horses with wings is very, very beautiful discussion and a very,

00:08:07--> 00:08:53

very beautiful example of interaction between husband and wife. As for the issue of toys, and dolls, I think this is something we have to delay and disgust when it comes to the issue of children inshallah, to Allah. But we're just going to broadly mention it in case you don't catch the subsequent videos, and maybe somebody gets confused, then we're just going to summarize it and say it's not allowed to have pictures in the house of living things, ie animals, human beings, and so on. It's not allowed to have dolls, or statues or anything like that. However, it is permissible for a young Muslim girl to have some rough shaped dolls, which could be like, like rag dolls, or like,

00:08:53--> 00:09:32

with dolls made of wool, that don't have proper facial features. We definitely don't want anything that resembles the kind of Barbie doll kind of thing which is very sort of realistic, has facial features and so on. But the kind of things that people would call rag dolls and so on. And part of the benefit of that is first of all, they don't have any facial features so they don't resemble the creation of Allah azza wa jal and secondly, they serve a purpose as it relates to tarbiyah as it relates to bringing up the children and developing certain characteristics within them, particularly for the young Muslim girl. We're going to get into that in short, little tighter when we talk about

00:09:32--> 00:09:43

children but we just wanted to clarify here so that somebody didn't miss understand and maybe didn't catch the subsequent video So just to be clear on that, and that's going to become clear inshallah, to Allah in our next Hadeeth

00:09:46--> 00:10:00

it's another Heidi from eyeshadow, viola and her Tokuda, Allah, Allah your Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam wakad set out to certainly be a clear arm in fee he Timothy Fela, Mara, who has

00:10:00--> 00:10:45

to echo what Hello when I watch who I translate the first bit first and we get to the second bit, I shut off the alarm and her she said that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam came into my home came into where I was. And I had covered a shelf that I had with a curtain on which there were images. And the interesting thing here is the other rewired, explained that the images were horses with links. The images were horses with wings. So it seems that I shuttle the alarm on her. That was something that she liked generally in terms of and we know the history of the Arabs and horses and the love they had of horses. She had a she had pictures of horses with wings on a

00:10:45--> 00:11:27

curtain. Now the Prophet size and remember allowed her to keep the doll and have it have been Hydra him allowed to Allah mentioned that this was quite late, in in the life of the Prophet sighs him after his word tabuk or hayball. So it wasn't something early in the days of Medina, he allowed her to keep that rough shaped horse with wings that wasn't realistic that wasn't didn't have all the facial features. He allowed her to keep that Salalah while he was in, but when he saw this picture of a horse with wings, he had a cow he ripped it down. What I love when I watch who and his face changed the color of his face. The color of his face change the Heidi's continues. what color they

00:11:27--> 00:11:39

are I should I should do Nancy either when en de la Yama Yama and levena Yoda who Nebula call it our Asia Takata I know who vagina Minh who we said that and we said the thing.

00:11:41--> 00:12:07

He said oh I should the people who are going to be the worst in punishment on the Day of Resurrection of those people who compete with the creation of Allah. Our Isha said, we cut it up and we made from it a pillow or to a cushion or to cushions or pillows to pillows? Where does this Heidi fit in? Muslim family, Ideal Husband, ideal wife, the concept of marriage? Where does it fit in? What are some of the benefits you're going to take? Pause the video Have a think

00:12:09--> 00:12:13

so inshallah to Allah, you've had a chance to think about that one inshallah.

00:12:14--> 00:13:00

Where I put this in, is I actually put it into almost all the categories, but definitely the ideal wife and the Ideal Husband. On the topic of the ideal wife, there are two points that I take from this. First of all, she saw the face of the prophet SAW some change. And this is an amazing characteristic for a wife to have, that she knows her husband's mood, even by looking at him that she doesn't even need to hear him say something. And we know the Prophet says and tore it down. But we've seen many narrations and different heidy that indicate that they used to see the anger of the prophet SAW him in his face. So I should choose to know. And likewise the Prophet sallallahu alayhi

00:13:00--> 00:13:53

wa sallam used to know when our Isha was upset, as we have in another Hadith, that he he said that he knew when I shut the alarm, and when she became upset, because when she became when she was happy with him, that she would say that I swear by the Lord of Mohammed, I swear by Allah, I swear by the Lord of Mohammed. And when she was upset with him, she would say, I swear by the Lord of Ibrahim. So look at how the husband and wife know each other from even sort of gestures, or indications, even just the look on a face, even just a subtle word that is used. They know each other from that. They know each other from that. So I feel that is extremely important. And it's a great, a beautiful

00:13:53--> 00:14:36

characteristic for a husband and a wife to have to know each other. And to know when someone is upset, even from small gestures, and small, small actions and the way they look on their face. Also, her obedience to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, the fact that she took it down the Prophet sighs Of course, she will obey the Prophet sallallahu it was him as a prophet nor that but as a husband also, that that he didn't like it. He wasn't happy with it. And of course him not liking it was a religious matter. It was a revelation from Allah subhanaw taala. But even a normal situation that a wife sees a husband doesn't like something and she made from it a cushion, or she made two

00:14:37--> 00:14:59

cushions from it. So it comes under that as well. Also from the characteristics of the Ideal Husband, we can take from it. I'm a premarital foreigner, he and Moncure and we mentioned this generally in topic of the Muslim family, the importance of commanding good and forbidding evil and that the prophets I said didn't leave it. He didn't let it go. He didn't, you know, just say that it doesn't matter. We'll deal with it later. She's young University.

00:15:00--> 00:15:47

She likes horses with wings just let it be. Instead he sallallahu alayhi wa sallam took it seriously and he made sure that he established the good in his household and that he forbade the evil in his household Salawat Allahu wa Sena MacLean that's an example. That's an example for all of us and that's why I put that particular Hadith. Another Hadith from our mother eyeshadow Viola huanghai this one in Pali and Muslim and Chateau de la Juana And Pilate jabesh one years Fiona, Fiona Aden famous for the early Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam for World War Two iclm and kibi for Gen two on voru Isla de la AB him had come to angeletti on sorry for any novelry la him.

00:15:48--> 00:16:36

I shut off the alarm on her. She said. The abyssinians came and they were displaying their military prowess, you know, kind of like a military display on a day of aid in the masjid. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam called me and I put my head on his shoulder, and I started to watch them play, because they were doing it as an entertainment as a play, but also it was of a benefit to them as well because it was a short of their military ability. Here in the second iteration, they were playing with spears until it was me who decided that I had had enough and I wanted to stop watching them. That's the first narration. We're going to hear the second narration pilot Ayesha. Wha la isla

00:16:36--> 00:17:18

de la Sol La Sol La while he was in yaku moradabad be heard y'all it will have a shot who yell Boone be harrowby him famous serial Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Yes, Tony Derrida, e li k on Viola in LR, AB him. She said, Well I saw the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, at the door of my apartment and the abyssinians were playing with their spears and the message of the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and he was covering me with his reader. The reader is the the garment which goes over the shoulder. You know, like when you wear that her arm and you have the bottom part and the top part, the top part, the one that goes over the shoulder. So any garment

00:17:18--> 00:18:08

that you wear like that, that the man wraps over the top of his shoulders. He called the reader he was covering her so that she could watch them play. So may a cool moment he then he was standing for my sake, had a corner and allottee unsolved to the point that I was the one who decided to that I'd had enough to walk away. Fuck doodle powder Algeria, tell Heidi that is sin hurry. So 10 and 11 anilao. So you should bear in mind he is giving advice. You mentioned bear in mind the needs of a young girl, a girl who's young in age, and she is keen or she wants to be entertained. She wants to have fun. Where do you think this Hadeeth falls into our discussion that we've had so far have a

00:18:08--> 00:18:08

think about that one.

00:18:10--> 00:18:56

So inshallah Allah you guys had to think about it. Well, I think it fits in is it's a beautiful Hadith in the characteristics of the Ideal Husband. And that is the profit side. Some gave Ayesha time. And he took care of her in terms of even her desire to have a little bit of fun to enjoy herself from time to time. And one of the most beautiful things I think, and this is a statement of Asia familia, kuhlmann edgerly. He stood for me had to akuna analytic outside until it was me who made the decision to leave. And you can imagine the Prophet slicin is covering her it's not you know, as he is tired, it's hard is he she's got her head, on his shoulder, his covering her with

00:18:56--> 00:19:47

his, the garment that is over his upper body. He's covering her with his upper garment. And he's standing on his two feet. So Allahu alayhi wasallam for how long he never says I should that's enough. Go now, finish it, you know, Hasbrook is enough for you to go back. He waited and waited and waited. Until I said, I've had enough. Sometimes even it's even alluded to the fact that our Isha actually stayed longer than she wanted to, to see how the Prophet size alum would behave. In other words, she waited to see that he was it was a big thing to her that he was standing for her. He was standing for her sake. And she was a young girl. He wasn't you know that we said the prophets and

00:19:47--> 00:20:00

had great responsibilities, the greatest responsibilities of any human being Salalah while he was in them, and yet he stood for for entertainment for something which was a play something which was just you're not

00:20:00--> 00:20:36

Yesterday, as we said it was a it was playing that was beneficial. And this is always whenever a Muslim entertains themselves, or plays. First of all, it must always be halal. And second of all, it should be something that is beneficial. For example, if someone plays a sport, and that sport, keeps them fit, keeps them healthy, allows them to worship Allah, then that is Allahu Allah MOBA, the permissible kind of entertainment, which is, you're enjoying yourself, you're having a bit of fun, but you're doing something that's beneficial. That abyssinians we're throwing spears, which is a skill, which you use in war. So it's incredibly beneficial when they would join the Muslim army, for

00:20:36--> 00:21:12

them to have that skill. But they were doing it in the masjid as a bit of entertainment for the people to watch. And there is no harm in that from time to time. It's not something that happen every day. And it's not the Prophet size and spent all day and all night entertaining Asia with all the love and wanting to have fun and so on. But he did, he saw that she you know, at the end of the day, we've said that there are restrictions on Muslim women, there's no doubt there are restrictions on Muslim men too, because our religion is a religion of Islam, its submission to Allah as origin, submitting to Allah subhanaw taala. And therefore they are going to be restrictions, there are going

00:21:12--> 00:21:53

to be things that limit what we can do. And so we should sometimes even though we limit ourselves in in what allies made permissible, there's no harm sometimes in having a little bit of alcohol and MOBA permissible entertainment, a little bit of relaxation, a little bit of fun, I know husband taking care of his wife in that regard, if he's gonna say to her, I want you to base yourself around the home, I want you to be you know, like the queen who is in the palace, I want you to kind of take care of that those things and be responsible for them, he still needs to give consideration to the fact that sometimes she wants to have a little bit of entertainment, a little bit of fun, but let it

00:21:53--> 00:22:36

be hard and let it be something which is beneficial. And let it be also within like not too frequent, let it be within the time which is reasonable so that it doesn't overtake the more important matters, and so on. But if you look at how much the Prophet sighs took care of it, and how much he loved the idea that he stood on his own feet salallahu alayhi wasallam for so long, in order for our Isha to be satisfied. In order for it to be satisfied. Perhaps he saw I saw him didn't want to watch or they only wanted to watch for a short time, but I shut off the alarm. And he stood for her main agenda for the for her sake. So this is a really beautiful description of the

00:22:36--> 00:23:18

characteristic of the Muslim husband and how he made Ayesha feel that she said to me a cool moment actually, just for me, he stood there. And that is really a really, you know, beautiful description of how a husband should make his wife feel. So we move on again to our next Hadeeth so for our next Heidi is also the Hadeeth of our mother I shadow the Allahu Ana and I shall the Allahu anhu and Kenneth Martin levy sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Effy several pilots for sir Dr. Wolf as a doctor who originally Palomar Hamel to LACMA sadock to faceva. Connie takala ha de BIE tilaka sepka.

00:23:20--> 00:23:42

This Hadees narrated in Abu Dhabi would soon be doubled from whether I shall have the alarm on her. She said I was with the prophets. I saw them in some of his journey, one of his journeys. She said, I raised him and I beat him on my I raised him on my feet. I raised him by foot, foot race, and I beat him.

00:23:43--> 00:24:04

I won the race. She said, when I had put on weight another time when I had put on weight. I raised him and he beat me he won the race. And he said hi the he Beatle castle said this time I want is to get you back or to pay you back for the other time that you want.

00:24:05--> 00:24:09

Where do you think this how it fits into our discussion? Have a think

00:24:12--> 00:24:18

so inshallah Allah you've had a, I think about it. I think this again comes into the Ideal Husband.

00:24:19--> 00:24:58

In terms of the way the Prophet sighs and was with Arusha. Playing with her we talked about the importance we talked about in the in the part of the Hadees rooms are either de hella fadeaway, the hydrogen acid, we talked about the importance of being playful with your family, the prophet sighs I'm raised with Asia or not. This is something private between the two of them, not in front of the eyes of the people, anything like that, at a race with Ayesha, and the first time she won because she was very young and she was very light. And then when she had put on weight because she had got become older, and the profitsystem took care of her. She had put on some weight, and then she raised

00:24:58--> 00:24:59

with him and he went

00:25:00--> 00:25:41

He said and he was so sweet though he said it to her sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he said that this is for that, like that. See, I now I won, because you were you won the first time. So now I want the second time. And I just think it just encapsulates how to talk in a sweet way to your wife, to be kind, to be friendly, to be fun to be playful. And again, that shouldn't be the whole time in the sense that it shouldn't be that a man is never serious. And that's why we talked about this also in the in the when we spoke about either the holla fade what you're hot Raja acid, it's not right for the man to be like, he's never ever serious. And he's always you know, he's he's, he doesn't he's

00:25:41--> 00:26:26

foolish. And we spoke about it also in the in another part of the Heidi films are about men who are tabaka any foolish and silly and not sensible. And we talked to her that's not how it should be all the time, but sometimes from time to time, that he takes that time to play with his wife to talk sweetly to his wife. And these are all beautiful examples from our messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, our next Hadees and echo Lima and if I burst in rhodiola, and Homer Carla in the little Hippo and it has a an early model, it cannot wait to enter zega Li, the anila her as our Julia code will run me through la de la. This is narrated by the moment of silence in Sunil Kumar. And it is a

00:26:26--> 00:27:07

effort from ebony Ibis, Ravi Allahu anhu. Man. He said, that I love to adorn myself, for my wife, just as I love for her to adorn herself, for me, because Allah azza wa jal says, Well 100 me through la de la in that they have risks, they have rights, similar or equal to those that the rights that the husbands have over them. So this actual effort is mentioned in Tafseer in the Tafseer, of the Iowa hootenanny through la de la neben maruf. And we've got this is going to come in shortly after either

00:27:08--> 00:27:56

in sort of Baccarat is going to come shallow to either in our discussion on the rights of the husband and the rights of the wife. So that's not an issue, we're going to come to that. But here I wanted to take this the action of the ambassador of your own home, I love to adorn myself to make myself look good. You know, it can be the way that he dresses, it could be the way that he he he puts perfume, the way that he takes care of his appearance for his wife, because I want her to do the same for me. And Allah said, women have rights that are the same or that are missing, they are an equivalent of the rights that their husbands have over them. So if the husband has the right for

00:27:56--> 00:28:35

his wife to dress up for him, then she has the right for her husband, to adorn himself and dress up for her. And we said that this could come under the Ideal Husband or the ideal wife could put under under either To be honest, that the husband adores himself looks good for his wife takes care of his appearance in front of his wife. And likewise, the reverse the wife looks carrot takes care of herself in front of her husband and takes care of how she looks in front of her husband. So that's actually all we have time for in this particular episode. So we still have some Heidi left so we'll continue those in the next episode inshallah to Allah continue to ask you guys to try and fit them

00:28:35--> 00:28:52

in to where they go in the course. And then inshallah we can move on from there to discussing the contract of marriage and the essence of that contract and what it means. That's what a lie is legitimate, easy for me to mention. And Allah knows best or Salatu was Salam Arabian Mohammed while early wasapi ajmeri

00:28:54--> 00:29:03

A Salaam Alaikum. If you're enjoying these videos, and you'd like to keep up to date with all of the courses we're going to be running, make sure you head over to a m [email protected]