O My Dear Father!

share this pageShare Page
Sajid Ahmed Umar

Channel: Sajid Ahmed Umar

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:00--> 00:00:01

So you want to get to

00:00:09--> 00:00:16

know him but uh, can you can everyone hear me inshallah I guess I can borrow a coffee come I'm I'm ready when you I just allow error

00:00:18--> 00:00:38

handling them again I said I'm aleikum wa rahmatullah. But I care to everyone brothers and sisters, and then handed in devil Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah. And I, this is the respond Kizzy. I'll be hosting efficient today. And you have a beautiful topic today as it which is about parents, and how should we

00:00:39--> 00:01:01

give importance to our parents I respond to them, how should we act with them? It is a very important topic. And of course, we can see it's a key, if you understand 200 agenda have been delighted and Allah subhana wa tada reminds us multiple times in Quran about how we should respond to our parents, how should we act towards them?

00:01:02--> 00:01:20

It suits them. And he also she has multiple examples of different prophets how they used to treat their parents. And one of the very beautiful examples is hazard Ibrahim, slam into the marine amasa panatela shares this short dialogue that he had with his father

00:01:22--> 00:01:54

out of Muslim, so we need to compare and see that's the panel our parents are Muslim, and how we act towards them. And while Ibrahim and I said I'm sure there was not a Muslim, and the way he treated him was well, you see he he treats his thoughts. You know, calling his parents his father in every single was a Muslim fellow that he he called him Yeah, Betty. Oh dear father, oh, my father. And first he's talking to a father is not a Muslim. So it sort of lets us know the significant importance of parents and we

00:01:55--> 00:02:38

talk to them and speak to them with with politeness with beautiful words. And in the end after his father when he tells him that you know, what, when when his father tells him that he's gonna kill him he has to run he should run away and you know, he doesn't want to see him anymore. It is not a reply him with aggression. Rather, he prays for him, and you tell them call a Salaam and lay the rain said please, Tony, stop. Fiddler cannot be in now. Can I be happy? Yeah, I will ask forgiveness for you, my lord. anybody has ever gracious. So all these examples in Quran, Allah subhanaw taala wants us how we need to respond to as our parents. And so today's and then we have a very esteemed

00:02:38--> 00:02:39

guest chef

00:02:40--> 00:03:19

who does not need any introduction. But just for people who wouldn't like to go further I just share a quick induction and Sharla shared phytomer is a qualified MFI, and judge as well as an educator, author, researcher and with a vision of ignite communities that benefit humanity upon the issues of security excellence and selflessness. She has also taught in development programs worldwide from lectures and massages to says and live events, as well as we are radio, TV and online platforms. He has been lecturing at knowledge international universities in 10, and is now a senior member of the academic management team. He has played an integral role in this title of the new Muslim Academy

00:03:19--> 00:03:24

where he enjoys participating as a lecturer and Senior Advisor she has

00:03:26--> 00:03:45

with mercy mission world as director of Islamic development with a scope of application over high impact projects such as the National charity right of being the chairman of all Cancer Institute as well after the weekend cause and students a guy is also the chief Islamic editor for literal little extra.

00:03:46--> 00:03:55

She decided also manage several media related is the founder of Tenzin and engaging online talk on focusing on the Quran without

00:03:56--> 00:04:05

you know, using much more time and then ask them to please take over and you know, enlighten us about about today's topic, but a lot we can share with you

00:04:10--> 00:04:21

about a man with a couple of lovely nomikos solid level male accept our deeds and forgive me and make me better than you will think of me. I mean Europe.

00:04:23--> 00:05:00

Everything shared was really out of your kindness. It was mine and it wasn't really a requirement. It was Aquila O'Hara for for honoring me and once again ask Allah to forgive me and to forgive you and everyone in attendance. I mean yarp smilla rahmanir rahim al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen will be in a stereo mono saliendo Salim ala Hartman Naveen Nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa seldom at the Sleeman kathira and Eli Yomi. Dean, my bad rubbish really sorry. westerly Emery. Oh, hello, look, that's me. Lisa. any of our code or praise belongs to Allah subhanho wa Taala alone. We praise Him and we seek his assistance.

00:05:00--> 00:05:40

And guidance and seek refuge in Allah from the evil of ourselves and the adverse consequences of our deeds. We testify the room serve Allah guides then can misguided whomsoever He must guides the man can guide and we request praises and blessings upon the final messenger Muhammad Abdullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. I believe that there is no one worthy of worship besides one Allah and that Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is His Messenger Allahumma salli wa sallim wa barik ala nabina Muhammad coolum vichara hood Quran abrar or solly ala nabina Muhammad Mata acaba Laila, wouldn't her or certainly Allah and Amina Muhammad wa al al muhajir, Lina and onsolve or Salah lamotta, Sleeman

00:05:40--> 00:05:40

kathira.

00:05:42--> 00:05:56

To our brothers and sisters in Islam. I greet you with the greetings of Islam and peace and the greetings of the people of Paradise Salaam salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. May the peace and blessings and safety from Allah subhanho wa Taala Allah be upon you all.

00:05:58--> 00:06:04

The topic that we want to discuss today is a topic about parents and being

00:06:07--> 00:06:39

model children, to our parents, and the importance of being dutiful, and kind, and beneficial to our, our parents. For those who've been following my dow, especially over the past few weeks, there's been many lectures and even an eight hour seminar that we just completed last weekend or the weekend before last, in relation to the importance of being good parents. And how

00:06:40--> 00:06:48

Allah subhanho wa Taala will question the parents about how effective they were as parents

00:06:49--> 00:07:01

on the day of PM, because this is an important duty that Allah subhanho wa Taala has conveyed upon all parents, and this discussion has been happening in earnest.

00:07:03--> 00:07:24

In terms of topic and balance, we also have the responsibilities that Allah subhanho wa Taala has revealed upon the children towards their parents, and this is a topic that needs to be discussed, as was nicely said by our brother ceman melas panaway to Allah bless him.

00:07:25--> 00:08:08

The topic is called the abiti. And the inspiration was Ibraheem alehissalaam specifically, but also the other and biale hemos. Salatu was Salam that Allah subhanho wa Taala teaches us about in the Quran, and how they would address their, their fathers. And even though we're talking about fathers, it's not void of the discussion about mothers, whatever we say about the father, whatever one confines to the scope of the Father in terms of being dutiful to your father, when you hear this topic of liberty, the know and understand that the mother is most deserving. And the mother is most deserving because the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to the person who asked him that, who

00:08:08--> 00:08:18

is most deserving of my good character after Allah and His role, and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said three times your mother, your mother, your mother. So

00:08:20--> 00:08:24

you know if even when we look at the name of the Quran, the name of the Quran speaks to us in a way that

00:08:26--> 00:08:30

engages our intellect that Allah Subhana, Allah sometimes tells us something

00:08:32--> 00:08:51

in relation to a matter, that is, instead of in relation to a matter that is of higher importance to it, because if you understand that it's important to this matter, then you'd know by default, that it's even or the reality applies even more to the other, the other matter, and this is from the eloquence of the Quran, and this is from

00:08:52--> 00:08:56

the excellence of the the manner through which revelation

00:08:58--> 00:09:39

educates us and the manner through which educate the education of the Quran and Sunnah benefits us. So everything we say today, even though you might be hearing is about Yeah, arbeitete know and understand that it applies in a greater way to MIT to the mother, as well, with regards to Ibrahim Alayhi. Salam and what was mentioned in the introduction. Well, for those who are familiar with the story of Ibrahim alayhi salam, we know that Ibraheem alehissalaam was born into a home whereby he, his father, his own father, was not just an idolater but he's father used to also manufacture the idols that the rest of society would end up worshipping the idols that were then placed in this

00:09:40--> 00:10:00

temple of idols which Ibraheem alehissalaam eventually, to try and instigate a form of critical thinking within his father and his people entered and he broke, he broke these idols except the big one and he left the tool that was used to break the idols on the big one in a form to instigate critical

00:10:00--> 00:10:41

Thinking because he kept on saying to his father and to the others? Why do you worship that which does not benefit you does not harm you, you know, in any way, it can't bring you any benefit in any way it can save you from any harm in any way. And they basically turned a blind ear towards him. And he wanted through this act of smashing the idols for them to realize that they can't even protect themselves. So if they can't protect themselves, then how is it that they will protect you now, in this process of, you know, being living upon his fitrah as a young boy, and not just seeing his father worship idols, also manufacture idols? He goes to his father and he engages him in a series

00:10:41--> 00:11:24

of discussions in the most beautiful of ways, whereby he calls out to his father using the term Yeah, Betty, oh, my beloved dear father, if we translate it into the English language, really, you can't have a word for translation, it has to be contextual, because in the Arabic language, there are 10 ways through which you can call your mother or your father, the softest, most best, most eloquent most excellent of ways is to call them Yeah, but he was attached at the end of the word mother, or the word father, yeah, mighty warrior liberty. And this is what the specialist scholars of the Arabic language, classical scholars of the Arabic language, have opined and stated, and it's

00:11:24--> 00:11:30

not surprising, because the big set up, they grew up upon the fitrah. And they were guided

00:11:32--> 00:12:13

in their lives, and Allah subhanho wa Taala highlights to us the finite details of the conversations with their fathers with their parents, as a means of benefiting us because we know that the Quran is a book of guidance for the believers and a book of guidance for mankind at large sort of bacara Allah says, Who doesn't deal with the pain? And he says, who then meanness the Quran is a book of guidance for the believers. And it is a book of guidance for mankind at large. So if Allah mentions it in the Quran, then it is a means of guidance for us. Now, as Ibrahim is engaging his father, oh, my dear beloved father, why do you worship that which doesn't benefit you and doesn't harm you? Oh,

00:12:13--> 00:12:24

my dear father, don't worship shape on and so on and so forth. He's This is our that he's doing to his father. This is from being excellent to your parents as well. We'll discuss this in sha Allah.

00:12:25--> 00:12:58

At some point of this particular talk, he's engaging his father in a beautiful way. His father, over time gets annoyed with Abraham, and becomes even angry with Ibrahim and even threatens to dispel him and expel him and even stone him. And despite this, he remains excellent with his father. And he says, Oh, my dear, beloved father, I will ask Allah to forgive you. And Allah allowed Ibraheem alehissalaam time to seek forgiveness for his father and then Allah subhanho wa Taala.

00:12:59--> 00:13:29

At a certain point of time for bait, Ibraheem alehissalaam for seeking from seeking forgiveness for his father, but until then, he carried on seeking forgiveness from his father for his father from Allah subhanho wa Taala. And this again teaches us an element of how to be excellent to your parents, how to be kind to your parents, how to be good to your parents. Okay. Now, brothers and sisters in Islam. Why should we be good to our parents? Well, you know,

00:13:30--> 00:13:43

technically we've we've discussed this point that a lot of this is from the way of Gambia Alamo. Salatu was Salam. And we can follow on from that by highlighting that Allah subhanho wa Taala has actually commanded us towards being

00:13:45--> 00:14:31

excellent and good to our parents and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam to followed on with this teaching. If we look in the Quran, we find in three places Allah subhanho wa Taala says Austin was suddenly or sinal in Santa Diwali de Krishna. Also in in in Santa in another eye bydd he sirna in Surah, to look man, Allah subhana wa Taala says also in an incense bydd that Allah has revealed to you advice regarding your parents, your mother and your father, right? And in all three Ayat of the Quran. We Allah subhanho wa Taala teaches us about being good to our parents and being dutiful to our parents in order to learn Kabuto surah Look man, and in Surah Kahf

00:14:32--> 00:14:59

we see Allah subhanho wa Taala highlighting that this this concept of being dutiful. This concept of being excellent applies to both parents be Wiley Dae Hee and pseudo surah Allah subhanho wa Taala teaches us that this matter really is part and parcel of to heat and La ilaha illAllah Muhammad Rasul Allah for Allah to Allah subhanho wa Taala says waka vara buka Allah taboo inlet iya will be widely

00:15:00--> 00:15:38

He said, a lot of commands you, he decrees and judges and commands that you worship no one other than Him. And look, he says and kind of worked out, he doesn't say then he says and that as Allah has commanded you to this instruction, and at the same level, Allah has commanded you to be dutiful to your parents, to your mother and your father. And this is how we understand the Quran. We understand the Quran as verses in light of other verses. So even though Ibrahim is speaking to his father saying, Yeah, but in the most beautiful of ways, when we see that the Quran has an instruction, that you'll be good to both parents, you can imagine that if he was talking to his

00:15:38--> 00:15:50

mother, how would he be calling out to his mother? The same applies to use of Allah His setup, how would he be calling out to his mother, when he said to his father, we find the same mentioned in the Quran, when he says to His Father,

00:15:53--> 00:15:57

almighty Father, yeah, but he in the era I see in my dream.

00:16:00--> 00:16:39

He says, I've seen the sun and the moon and the stars prostrating to me when he addressed his father and when to speak to his father about this. Allah tells us that this is how he addressed his father is married to his Salaam Subhana Allah when he had his discussion with his father, Ibrahim. Now, Ibrahim is much older. Ibrahim is over 90 years of age, right? He's over 100 years of age on conservative figures, looking at what the orlimar have stated. And Ibrahim is telling his son that I've seen in my dream that I'm slaughtering you. What do you think his son says to his father? Oh, Ibrahim says his message to Brahim the son of Abraham says to him, yeah, but if I met tomorrow, oh,

00:16:39--> 00:17:14

my dear beloved father, the same thing that Abraham would say to his father, he has his son now saying it to him. And this is a sign of the benefits of being dutiful to your parents that if you do default to your parents, Allah will give you progeny that inshallah will be beautiful to you. For loss of Hannah, who Allah says I'll just say any Indian accent in Surah Rahman, that can the reward for excellence be anything except excellence, can the reward for goodness and kindness and generosity and mercy be anything other than the same? Right? So this is another benefit, why we should

00:17:16--> 00:17:37

be good to our, our parents and inshallah we can list this within the balance of why we need to be good to our parents. But coming back to this point, brothers and sisters in Islam, Allah subhanho wa Taala in three pieces of the Quran, as we mentioned, he advises us in in the form of a command, this is beloved to Allah

00:17:38--> 00:18:21

to be dutiful, to our parents to be kind to our parents in another verse to be excellent to our parents. And in sort of an era he connects this concept to to heat Well, cavora book Allah abu allah Yeah, well, Bill Wiley de Santa Wiley, Dania Santa, Allah commanded to worship only him and be excellent to your parents. And this was an earlier verse by the way, or from the earliest of verses revealed from the Macan vs revealed, which means that it's part and we know that the Mk converse is focused on belief in what Allah believes in the messenger belief in the Hereafter, and matters pertaining to good character. And here we see in the makan stage of the revelation of the Quran,

00:18:21--> 00:19:01

Allah subhanho wa Taala commanding the believers not just to be good to their parents, but to be excellent to their parents and that this is from La ilaha illAllah Muhammad Rasulullah La ilaha illAllah Muhammad Rasul Allah is not just a concept of worship, but it is worship, a religion plus an entire way of life. It's about how you speak, how you think how you talk, how you act, how you analyze things, how you consider things, it's our entire way of life and from the greatest values of La ilaha illAllah, Muhammad Rasul Allah is that you be dutiful to your parents. Now,

00:19:02--> 00:19:17

this brings us on to the discussion of why we understand what being beautiful to our parents are if we ponder over what was spoken about from the story of Ibrahim and use of it Salim Ismail, Allah He Salam and and some of the other

00:19:19--> 00:19:57

points we've had thus far in this introduction, then no doubt we can deduce, you know, what does it mean to be good to your parents who, why should we be good to our parents who haven't now we discussed this just now, that number one, this is from the way of Gambia AlLahi wa Salatu was Salam. But before that, this is a command from Allah subhanho wa Taala. In doing so, you are looking after the command of Allah subhanho wa Taala. To be not just Allah says Be good to them. Allah says Be kind to them, but a lot also commands us towards being excellent to them. And this is how we understand goodness and kindness in light of diverse commanding us towards excellence. Right? It's

00:19:57--> 00:20:00

about excellence and it's about us divided

00:20:00--> 00:20:37

loping our relationship with them, developing our character wisdom, developing our approaches wisdom, it's about seeking forgiveness from Allah subhanho wa Taala when we slip in terms of our journey, being beautiful to them, and we understand from this, that being dutiful to our parents is a journey. A lot commands us towards being excellent. This is why this is the crux of it. Why do we need to be good to them? Firstly, because Allah commanded this to us. Now we know brothers and sisters in Islam, that Allah subhanho wa Taala His commands are all are filled with everything that is good, everything that is mercy, everything that is considered to be justice, everything that is

00:20:37--> 00:21:12

considered to be progress, everything that is considered to be safety, and development, and the building of our paradise. This is the reality of all the commands of Allah subhanho wa Taala, Allah subhana wa tada some commands towards anything that leads towards harm. And when a law commands us towards excellence, if we ponder over it, you know, so we said, Why do we have to be good to our parents? Because Allah commanded us towards being excellent with them. Why should we be excellent with them? Why? Right? Well, firstly, firstly, because, number one,

00:21:14--> 00:21:23

they brought us up, when we were young, they raised us to the point where now we became responsible over ourselves, this is number one.

00:21:25--> 00:21:31

That duty, that service that they offered mandates a lifetime of service from us to them.

00:21:32--> 00:21:53

That's the reality. Okay. And that's how Allah has set the dynamics of life. It's a matter of physics, because they looked after us, with care with love, without us asking them to do so at our most vulnerable stage or during the most vulnerable stages of our life.

00:21:55--> 00:22:04

Right? This gives them the stripes gives them the position that mandates a lifetime of duty and service from us towards them. That's number one.

00:22:05--> 00:22:05

Number two,

00:22:06--> 00:22:10

you must be excellent with them. Why? Because

00:22:11--> 00:22:23

they were good to us. Right? So we should only want good for them. If we are not excellent with them, we will only make their job being a parent to us more difficult.

00:22:24--> 00:22:53

And if we, if we make it difficult, there's a chance they may fail. And if they fail, then they will be held accountable in front of Allah subhanho wa Taala on the scam. No doubt, if it's beyond their hands, Allah will forgive them. Allah will. Ally's just right. But whenever one party and we know this, when we look at the dynamics of relationships in life, when one party decides to be difficult, they make it easier for the other party to make mistakes.

00:22:54--> 00:23:16

Right. So when we lack excellence, in terms of our relationship with our parents, they only want to be excellent towards us. But we make the process so difficult that human nature may take over, and they may do something that isn't from that which Allah subhanho wa Taala has placed upon them in terms of responsibility and diligence in the parenting process, which makes them prone to errors from them,

00:23:18--> 00:23:41

because of our instigation, or the instigation of the child, and what will happen, our parents become answerable in front of Allah subhanho wa Taala and the deaf pm. Now which child wants to see their mother or father going through a difficult standing in front of Allah Subhana who turn on the deaf PM, which child in their right mind and right heart wishes that the parents suffer in front of Allah on the day of pm?

00:23:42--> 00:24:25

Who does that? right? Especially when everything that the parents are doing is only for the benefit of the child and in being in the service of our children or their children because of the command from a loss of Hannah Who? right but then you decide to turn to get older, and you decided that no, I wanted my way or the highway and then and then what with no sin from your parents, you behave in a way that instigates human nature to come to the forefront. Everybody is different, as we know, boys and girls to my to the teenagers listening in to everyone listening in we all different, right? Some people react to different circumstances and situations differently. When things are normal. We are

00:24:25--> 00:24:38

most able to be excellent in terms of the tasks that we have to do. But when there's turbulence, we can't guarantee that excellence right. So we have to be excellent to them brothers and sisters in Islam firstly because they are they are

00:24:39--> 00:24:46

you know, they have been tasked by Allah right. they they they have been asked to be in

00:24:48--> 00:24:59

to be in our service. Secondly, because we no one wants them to have a difficult time in front of Allah subhanho wa Taala and on the DFA Allah because Allah subhanho wa Taala will will question

00:25:00--> 00:25:10

Thirdly, brothers and sisters in Islam, why should we be excellent our parents? Why? Because they are a means for us.

00:25:11--> 00:25:36

They are a means for us, our development, right, to a degree is dependent on their service to us. If we facilitate things for them from ourselves, we give them the opportunity to be excellent in terms of their service to us, that excellence will only entail an hour

00:25:38--> 00:25:54

our chances improving our chances to develop our character to develop our intelligence to develop our understanding of life, to develop our decisions, or how we go about making those decisions. And, and, and so on and so forth. Right? We, you know,

00:25:55--> 00:26:35

depending on the material that's been used, when something is invented, that mandates how excellent the final invention is, right, depending on how smooth The operation was, right? Will we find success in terms of the outcomes of that operation? This is common sense. It's a matter of physics. So if we had eautiful, to our parents, naturally, we make their process towards us, right? It's never going to be effortless, but we're gonna we're gonna we're gonna make their their their processes towards us, the diligence that they have to complete with regards to us even more efficient, at the end of the day, it's a win win situation, they will win hamdulillah and we will

00:26:35--> 00:27:14

win. But the more difficult, we make it to panela. If you think you only harming them, realize that you also harming yourself, right? You're only setting yourself up for failure. And it's not from the way of the believer to set himself and herself for failure. All right, so this is a long topic, my dear brothers and sisters in Islam. But so far, I have the lamb just sharing nutshells you know, what is? Is this topic of being excellent to our parents? Number one, number two, why should we be good to our parents? There's many, why is that we can discuss? I've shared with you three. Now, naturally, the third question would be how, how do we be excellent to our parents? How do we go

00:27:14--> 00:27:42

about being excellent to our parents. And again, this is a topic that requires a long time together, right? But I want to share with you, like we've been doing in the previous points, a finite amount of points that I feel are important to this time. And it doesn't mean if I don't mention anything else, that I don't mean that those points are important as well. But putting everything in the balance, as the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, we said did one party to the best of our ability, we try and pick out

00:27:44--> 00:27:57

we try and complete matters, I want to highlight with you a finite amount of matters that suitable to the time that we have, in a manner that's also suitable to the time that we have, that I feel if we take care of it. This will help us

00:27:58--> 00:28:35

in our journey towards bill Lydd bill below it then being good to our parents. And by the way, brothers and sisters in Islam. One thing we didn't mention at the beginning, in terms of what the topic is, Bill, validate this concept of bill, which is translated as being good to your parents. And we've correctly said it's about being excellent to your parents. The word bill comes from bar and bar in the Arabic language river refers to vast plains, right, vast plains of land, or a vast surface area of something whereby, you know, the end of it is as far as you can see.

00:28:37--> 00:28:43

So when we when he said bill holiday, it's about being good to your parents in a vast way.

00:28:44--> 00:29:25

There's no limits to it. There's no limits to it. Right. And it's appropriate that we highlight it here when we go into the house. Because even though I'm sharing with you a finite amount of points, the how there's no limits to it. Everything that you can imagine, or your society imagines, or your friend circle imagines to be goodness, and I'm not saying in isolation, I'm saying society agrees in general, this is from being good to your parents, that this is included in general no editing, as long as it doesn't go against the commands of Allah subhanho wa Taala. Right. So we benefit this just from the 10 bit and validate how the Sunnah describes to us about being good to our parents,

00:29:26--> 00:29:59

and that is from those beloved acts to the to Allah subhanho wa Taala. And from the worst acts, that oh from the acts that Allah hates the most is disrespecting our parents. When the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam talks about goodness to our parents, the 10 bill is used, which comes from bar which constitutes vastness right? That the you cannot go too far. You cannot go too far everything and anything that constitutes goodness. This is from Guru aladeen. Even if it even if it's a point brothers and sisters in Islam whereby you told your parents you will be home at 8pm

00:30:00--> 00:30:38

You are getting home now at 803, for example, 803, you don't just say, Don't worry, they'll be okay. They will notice you found them at 755 and say I will be three minutes late. And so part of law today we have technology that helps that, right, the Sat Nav, the Google Maps will tell you arrival, estimated arrival time, you have the ability to use this technology, which our parents putting our hands on, sometimes we use the wrong way to use it the right way. So Pamela, right, we have the ability to, to actually go that distance, some might say, Are you being a bit too extreme? No, there's no extreme when it comes to being kind to our parents. There's no extreme.

00:30:39--> 00:30:57

Right? There's no extreme. So Hon, Allah. May Allah forgive us? Because there's so much we can do, but we don't think so. We don't do it. Because we don't think it's so we don't realize it. And because we don't realize it, we can't do it. And how often does the Quran command us towards pondering and thinking, pondering and thinking, pondering and thinking panela?

00:30:59--> 00:31:15

In terms of what I want to share brothers and sisters in Islam with regards to the how, how can we be excellent to our parents? Again, there's so many ways, but in terms of this discussion, I will share with you a handful number one, number one brothers and sisters in Islam, both the agenda for them,

00:31:17--> 00:31:36

build the agenda for them. There's no better gift that you can give your parents besides a higher place in general. How do you do this number one, when they live, of course, by learning as much of goodness that you can from them and implementing it. You're doing that sadhaka to Jerry Avada.

00:31:37--> 00:32:04

Number one, number two, after they pass away, to continue living those teachings, and then teaching it to your children and your grandchildren and other people. For every time someone does it. Your parents will get the reward because they were the ones who taught you in the first place as the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said in an authentic narration, the narration of abora Viola Whoa, I mean, there are illa houden Candela who miss Candela who miss Lulu demon

00:32:05--> 00:32:21

Tabby, Lion Casa de la la casa del camino del Rahim Shia, Allah Subhana Allah the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said whoever teaches goodness, he will get the reward of the one who follows him in the goodness of Allah or practices that goodness.

00:32:24--> 00:32:35

Okay, without a lot taking any rewards from the person who did the act. So if I teach you something, and you do it and it's good, allow will reward me and reward you.

00:32:37--> 00:33:04

To handle become merciful and just Allah subhanho wa Taala is right, Allah subhanho wa Taala will reward me and reward you, he will reward me and take and reduce your deeds rather, you will be rewarded and I will be rewarded, we both will be rewarded. So if your parents teach you and you act they will be rewarded every time you do when you teach other people you will be rewarded every time they do and your parents. This is from being excellent to your parents.

00:33:06--> 00:33:33

This is from Bill holiday. And being excellent to your parents, helping them build their agenda. By putting into practice that which they teach when they are alive and after they pass away. Also, after they pass away, you can help them boost their gender by raising your hands and making you do out for them. Especially by saying Rob Durham Houma Kamara by any so hear that oh my lord have mercy upon my parents for my parents raised me when I was young.

00:33:34--> 00:33:44

When you make drive for your parents, a lot he was them, even though now they in the grave, and they cannot earn a lot he wants them. And when I was rewarding them the agenda is growing.

00:33:46--> 00:34:06

Another way to benefit them and be good to them after they pass away is to build some form of sadaqa jariya for him a well for example, that gives or you sponsor a student who becomes a teacher of the Quran, and then he teaches the Quran and you intend by the money that you spent, that it is up to Jerry or for your mother and your father.

00:34:08--> 00:34:28

Every time the goodness that you are a means for for your parents, benefits others a lot of the woods then once they are in the grave. So Pamela, so the agenda is growing. And when they get to Allah subhanho wa Taala on the day of karma, they will say Allah, are these my deeds? I don't recall this.

00:34:29--> 00:34:37

These deeds are worth you have a big agenda and I don't think I did these deeds. And Allah will say indeed you did, by leaving these children behind.

00:34:38--> 00:35:00

So this is one way brothers and sisters in Islam to help them build their agenda to help them build their agenda whilst they are alive. And after they passed away. And we've shed some examples. Number two, to help them shape their position in gender become raised. How do you help their position in gender being raised, you help their position in gender being raised by being the

00:35:00--> 00:35:11

Best Muslim you can be because Allah subhanho wa Taala says we're levena Ehrman, whatever, To him be a man, and how can I be him zuri yetta him or let him initiate.

00:35:12--> 00:35:14

Allah says as for those who believe,

00:35:15--> 00:35:30

and they raised their children to believe, and their children pass away upon belief in Allah subhanho wa Taala a lot will raise the parents to the children's rank in gender, if the children are at a higher rank.

00:35:32--> 00:35:44

La ilaha illAllah. If the children at a higher rank, Allah will raise the parents to the rank of the children. This is from being excellent your parents might, my dear brothers and sisters, that you be the best Muslim that you can be

00:35:46--> 00:36:17

that had you wake up for at night or the Monday that you fast or that you pray or the sooner that you complete, you're doing it for the sake of Allah, but also have in your heart that insha Allah, it's a means of you being rewarded as well for being kind to your parents. Because by doing this, it will be a means insha Allah for you to get a higher agenda maybe than your parents could achieve. And Allah will raise your parents to your level on the day of karma, when you antigen, imagine how happy your parents will be?

00:36:18--> 00:36:25

What greater gift Can you give them, then a higher stage in gender. So this topic of neural validators of heinola if we ponder over it properly,

00:36:26--> 00:36:43

right, and put it in the balance with the love that we have for our parents and the commands that Allah has placed upon us with regards to them, and the service that they did to us, and you think Subhanallah they only deserve the best what is the best be a model Muslim, and when you slip, seek forgiveness from Allah subhanho wa Taala.

00:36:44--> 00:37:19

And if you think of it holistically like this, whenever you do a good deed, you get rewarded for that deed, if it's done for the sake of Allah, and a bonus reward, what's the bonus reward, the bonus reward is you get rewarded for being kind to your parents as well. Because you have at the back of your mind, in your heart that insha Allah, you will be a means of your parents ranks being raised in the hereafter. This is a bonus reward. So hi Nola. And this is from the beauty of Islam. But how many of us think and ponder brothers and sisters in Islam. So help them build the agenda number one, number two, help them raise their rank in gender. The next point brothers and sisters in

00:37:19--> 00:37:22

Islam, that we can in terms of how we can

00:37:24--> 00:37:53

be good and excellent to our parents and help them in the parental process is by health, having good friends, choosing good friends, not choosing friends that are popular, not following your desires in terms of who your friend should be. But at the in the front of your mind and in the front of your heart, fighting yourself and not being friends with those who will cause you to damage your relationship with your parents eventually. And going towards those even though now you don't think it's a good idea.

00:37:54--> 00:38:30

Because your desires want something else. But those who will help blow your relationship with Allah subhanho wa Taala and help your parents, your parents be good parents to you. Because those friends will assist you in being good children to your parents. Because those are the friends who are truthful. The friends who are the Friends of Eman, the Friends of Islam, the friends who know that they're going to pass away one day, the friends who fear Allah subhanho wa Taala. They're not popular, because they're not doing the things that the cool kids are doing. But the cool kids, they're doing that which goes against Allah. So you stay with those that are not popular on Earth,

00:38:30--> 00:38:40

but they populate in the heavens. They are famous with the angels, they are popular with the angels. Why? Because Allah loves them. And Allah praises them to His angels, you go befriend those people.

00:38:41--> 00:38:52

And I don't say this from a vacuum. Because the prophets of Allah who I think he was setting them, he had time to teach us also about the importance of having good friends, even though he had so many big things to take care of.

00:38:54--> 00:39:24

Despite this, he mentioned to us the importance of having a good friend circle and that we will be upon the way of our friend. So don't underestimate the friend circle you choose. If your friend is a friend of a man and principle, then you will be a person of Eman And you will also be principled. But if your friend isn't, then most likely you will end up being upon what they are upon. Because when you tell someone I like you, you are telling them I want to be like you. That's what you saying.

00:39:25--> 00:39:59

Right? So it's about choosing who you want to be like, and thus who you like. One of the best ways to be excellent to your parents is ensuring that you choose a good friend circle. And if you have a friend that's a bad influence, be excellent to your parents by divorcing that friend and divorce that friend because that will that is what a truly intelligent person would do. A person who's been to the hereafter and seen the verifier and come back to us. This is impossible but if they were to that friend would be divorced. Divorced that friend do the intelligent thing.

00:40:00--> 00:40:35

For the sake of Allah, because it's the right thing to do. So this is another piece of advice brothers and sisters in Islam, my time is running out. So I'm going to quickly go through them. The next point that I have for you, brothers and sisters in Islam is to use the things that your parents give you properly. Our parents love us, sometimes out of blind love, they give us things before we deserve to have them. They give us a phone before we are qualified to have a phone. They give us access to the internet before we are qualified to have access to the internet. They give us a vehicle before we are qualified. What do I mean by qualified, I don't mean you know how to use it.

00:40:35--> 00:41:13

You might know how it operates, how it functions, how to open a social media account, and so on and so forth. I mean by qualified islamically qualified, that you know how to use it in a way that's pleasing to align displays into shape and not in a way that is pleasing to shape on and displeasing to Allah. Sometimes our parents, they out of blind love the human beings, they love us, they know we want something, they see that the other kids have it. Right? So they give us something. And being excellent to your parents is in learning how to use that thing by asking your parents is accola here for this? How should I use it in a way that is pleasing to Allah, so that I can help you my dear

00:41:13--> 00:41:44

mother, and you my dear father and myself in this life and the next. This is from being excellent to our parents. Right? They many children just point fingers. And our parents made the mistake, they gave it to us, they gave it to you but you have a brain, you have a heart, you have fitrah do you not feel that you have some responsibility towards yourself? You live in the age of inflammation, you've been to the masjid, you've heard the Juma hope you've had some lectures, many lectures in English and hamdulillah. Online. Surely, at some point in your life, you heard about the importance of being good to your parents.

00:41:46--> 00:41:51

Right? So don't you feel you have a responsibility on yourself to help your parents in this process?

00:41:52--> 00:41:56

Right, that, you know, mostly they are giving, but sometimes I can give as well.

00:41:57--> 00:42:26

Right? Because we are a team. And remember we said, the better they are, the better we are to them, the better they can be to us. So we also have a role to play. So it's from kindness, my dear brothers and sisters in Islam, and goodness and excellence to our parents, that we use the gifts that they give us purpose in a way that is pleasing to Allah subhanho wa Taala. So the things that they give us is not a means of destroying them and destroying us. And this applies to education, university, holidays, everything you can think of.

00:42:27--> 00:42:37

Because parents are not angels, they will make mistakes, sometimes they will, they will give into something that we want, because they feel guilty. For example, this is human nature.

00:42:38--> 00:42:56

And this that's another lecture when I speak to your parents, that's another lecture in terms of that, but should they slip we need to fix it from the angle of speaking to the children as well, that you also have a duty towards your parents a lot told you to be excellent towards them. Excellent towards them is also doing that which saves them from harm.

00:42:58--> 00:43:33

It's not just about saying Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Three bags full, sir. If they tell us we do if they don't tell us they didn't tell us? No, they didn't tell you but you know, or you should know. You have a fitrah you have a man, you have some form of, of inner voice that guides you towards the truth. And you need to be excellent to your parents. So use the things that they give you property. The last thing brothers and sisters in Islam that I want to share is good character. Because from the heaviest things on the scales of a believer on the day of the AMA is taqwa and good character, and good character. We touched on this brothers and sisters in Islam in terms of how,

00:43:34--> 00:43:50

you know, we said, you know, being good to them is vast, there's nothing too small, there's nothing too big in terms of being good to them, even if it means you calling them if you're going to be a minute late, so that they don't worry, for example, but also in terms of good character entails.

00:43:52--> 00:43:59

You giving our to them, like Ibrahim gave the power to his father, using the rules of Dawa,

00:44:00--> 00:44:24

that you speak to them beautifully. You don't scold them. You don't shout at them. And even if remember, Abraham's father was wrong, but he scolded Ibrahim, and he shouted at Ibrahim, and he threatened Ibrahim, but Ibrahim carried on being kind. And when he brought him felt that he can't speak to his father. He can't stop his father or he brought him to he's making dua to Allah. He says I will ask Allah to forgive you.

00:44:26--> 00:45:00

This is from excellent, need to have good character, right? So you have to have that our you have to win win a lot. They win a lot teaches you something and it's not in your home or your parents don't have it's not about scolding them. It's about being a day and recognizing what our is. That word is not a flick of a switch where you change people overnight. Your parents know they can't change you overnight. You should also know you can't change them overnight. You might see them doing something against the sun. It's about being a daddy towards them. And that hour cannot happen unless you patient so this

00:45:00--> 00:45:23

Another quality that we should have brothers and sisters in Islam develop our ability as children to be patient, patient especially with our parents, especially when we invite them towards good Rahim Allah He Salah was very patient. When he left finally Babylon where he was with his father and community. He left when he was much when he was now older, he was still patient in trying to

00:45:24--> 00:46:01

be a means of guidance for them. Right? You might want to marry someone, and your parent is saying, No, don't forsake your parents cut ties. Right? They were with you from the beginning, you want to cut ties for a boy or a girl that you just met a few days ago. It might be a few months ago, but literally in comparison to how long you know your parents. You just met them a few days ago. You have to be patient. Now, you have to be wise This is from good character. This is from being excellent to your parents. Right? taking different means making dua that Allah eases the situation, speaking to people who your parents trust to speak to your parents, maybe they can help change your

00:46:01--> 00:46:08

parents minds, but not just cutting off ties and giving up. Right, so you need patience, and it's part of good character.

00:46:09--> 00:46:17

Brothers and sisters in Islam. And finally, being good to your parents is still the grief is till they till they breathe last.

00:46:18--> 00:46:27

And that means you taking on the role that they had when you were a baby when they become older.

00:46:28--> 00:46:38

Because even though they become older, Allah returns them to a helpless state. Like we were in a hopeless state, when we were born.

00:46:40--> 00:46:42

being excellent to them is not locking them up in a home

00:46:44--> 00:46:51

to pass away alone and lonely. No, it's about being in the service patiently and with a smile and with love.

00:46:55--> 00:47:06

In their helpless state as they were in our service, when we were helpless, they never complained that oh the bathroom, you know, I have to change the nappies. And it's a very gross

00:47:07--> 00:47:16

thing, or you know, they keep me up at night, or this or that I have to literally change them everything put the hand in the sleeve, they did it for us, with love.

00:47:18--> 00:47:48

We have to train ourselves and our character, to be able to do it for them with love as well. You cannot be too small to think about this brothers and sisters in Islam. You can never be too young to think about this and have this ambition that I want that you make dua to Allah that Allah raised me to be so excellent to my parents that in their old age with love and care and, and with heart and with a smile. I be in their service irrespective of the circumstance just as they were in my service when I was small.

00:47:50--> 00:48:28

Y'all law generally bar on Diwali the year, Allah make me bar bar is from big. Make me a person who practices in the best of ways bill and validate being excellent to his or her parents. There's much to share on this topic brothers and sisters in Islam I've just shared with you seeds that I feel inshallah will be a means of instigating thought at your end. I certainly have to depart they are making the karma for certain Muslim boy I am. I love you all for the sake of Allah. Everything correct said is from Allah alone and he's perfect. any mistakes of myself and share fun and I seek Allah forgiveness. May Allah subhanho wa Taala preserve our parents in his obedience, I mean, and

00:48:28--> 00:49:01

show His mercy upon them. I mean, and grant them better than they dream of in both worlds. I mean, may Allah assist us in being good to our parents whilst they are alive and after they pass away? I mean, may Allah preserve us in his obedience as well, so that we live lives worth you have insha Allah raising the ranks of our parents on the day of pm and mean, and for those parents who have passed away May Allah make the graves garden from the gardens of Jenna. I mean, arable land I mean, hello Allah masala was sending me back I didn't have enough for it. He was such a big Marine, said Mr. alikum warahmatu Allahi wa

00:49:03--> 00:49:29

Alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh Subhan Allah exactly would love him kissing for all the beautiful advice in this amazing session to share. We ask Allah subhanaw to bless you with goodness Rivoli abundantly increasing your knowledge and make you practice it. I mean, dear brothers and sisters, let us remember all these advices and to practice everything that has been discussed in our lives. I mean, a lot less us and our parents and May he be pleased with us. I mean, does that come with loken caffeine as you're about to come off ECAM szczepanik locomobi handy

00:49:31--> 00:49:34

stuff in Canada April Salaam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh