Channel: Omar Suleiman
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I mean, whatever gone in LA,
last Sunday was selling with avocado, avocado silicom, coming in Salalah, it was selling wine.
So I apologize for all the time that it took getting set up. For those of you that are joining online, we prayed a lot of level at one o'clock. So it took us a little bit of time, after a lot of levels to get set up, we apologize for the technical difficulties.
But if you're going to have a baby, you need to be a little bit more patient than that, you're gonna wait 20 minutes or so and you need to be able to wait much longer and settle. But anyway, so just to introduce this topic, I'm really I'm extremely excited about it. And I have enough material to go until muffit of time. So I'm going to try to cover as much of it as I can, in Chatelet, in the short time that we have. But it's a topic that I know that many people would, you know, love to see addressed. And the testimony to that is that we plan this event on Wednesday, to do a lot of blogging, we have over 1300 viewers online.
So obviously, it's a topic that doesn't get addressed must. And I know that you know personally whenever
you know, I know a family that just had a baby, I can expect like 20 text messages of questions on the first day.
So this is a you know, I'm really excited about doing this, this class in Charlottetown, I hope it will be beneficial. And it's something that everyone will have to go through in some way at some point in their life. So even if you yourself are not expecting any children, at least it's good to have this knowledge so that you can coach other people might be in that same situation and just having you know, knowledge of the situation is very good. Now,
we have two aspects of this, you know, traditionally when they're in or not, you know, talked about anything of that they also included tusky.
A lot of times when we talk about finance, just Hello financing, that's it, we just give an account executive here, we give the ruling on it, and then we just move on. But I really wanted to introduce this topic with a lot much more than that. So before we even get to the 50 aspects, there'll be a lot of Helen and Tom and soon and taking notes and so on so forth. But before that just talking about this topic as a whole, you know, we have to remember that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he encouraged us to have children. So having children is a signal, and the Prophet sallallahu send them. He said, you know, have as many children as you can fry, we'll be proud of
your number on the Day of Judgment, what's the last symbol boast about the number of Muslims on the Day of Judgment. Now, obviously, this oma is the largest amount of believers on the Day of Judgment out of all of the nations of the prophets, this oma will be the largest of them all. So like I said, I'm encouraged us and the prophets, I'm talking about being proud of us on the Day of Judgment, you know, the number that we have,
obviously, from the individual perspective, from the virtues of having children is that it is the greatest investment that you can make. As we know the messengers on a lot of it was send them
he said that he said to a person, a son, when he was referring to his father, the son was asking his, you know, was asking the messenger of a loss of a lot what he was saying what belongs to my parents, and also loss I still am said, until a medically obese and what to do Kessel.
You end what you've earned belong to your father and obviously to both of your parents, but it was in the context of the father at that moment. And with some loss, I said, I'm sad that the child is the earning of his parents. Right, you know, somehow a lot, you work so hard, you toil to raise this child. And because of that, everything that that child does goes to your records. And in fact, all of the actions that the prophets lysozyme, continue after said continue after we die, being sought upadhyaya, a continuous charity, a righteous child to make up for us, or a beneficial knowledge, all of them are found within it within a child, because for the most part, who's going to make the app
for you consistently other than your child, who's going to give charity on your behalf consistently other than your child, who's going to spread your beneficial knowledge consistently other than your child. So it's really, you know, it's a worthy investment. And not only that, but no, we don't have lucky comments on this beautiful heavy. He says that not only is this limited to the child, but to the entire offspring. Right? So can you imagine that our great great great great great grandparents if they were Muslim, and they taught their children how to pray, we taught their children how to pray, who taught their children how to pray, and who taught them that you have a long time to learn
the importance of being Muslim. There could be someone hundreds of you know, that passed away hundreds of years ago, that's benefiting from you being here right now.
For being in a gathering of remembrance and a loss of kind of what's so the investment continues for a long line and we continue to be a part of the legacy of the profits of the LA audio center and also last why Salaam is part of the good deeds of Ibrahim it has set up
And that's why Allah subhanaw taala blessed this night I need to sit I'm so much imagine him and his brother, his house, I need to sit down. And listen last night someone said Allah has chosen from the children of Ibrahim this night. Right? This man has a higher level than his house. But if you look under his hat, you have so many profits, all of the profits of any Islam, because Yahoo, or Islam is a sign of his hat. You have the 12, the 12, sons of Yahoo, and you have all of the 12 tribes of Israel and all of the profits that came from that. And when this night is not you have this long line, going just to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and from Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam
there's a continuous legacy. So when you invest in something like this and have a lot of learning, it's something that that will benefit you not just with your children but inshallah to Allah with their grandchildren and their children, and so on, so forth. So there's the investment aspect of it. And there's also the aspect of struggle
as Muslims we like to struggle for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala because we know Allah subhanaw taala reward struggle, we know it loss penalty, rewards pain, and Allah subhanho wa Taala in Nepal, and he, you know, he talks about the mother, in particular hammer, that's what number one and Anna hammer Let's call her Ba ba ba to call her Allah describes labor pains a lot describes the pain at the time of delivery, a loss of Hannah Tata describes the way that the mother would scream, you know, whenever she's delivering and a loss of headphones, Allah is expressing this, to show that a loss of habitat is not unaware of your struggle. And the struggle of the parents as a whole.
Obviously, as a soul loss I sent him said that there is no form of anxiety, nor no form of distress, no form of harm, no form of disease, except that when the believer is struck by it in XP, it takes away his sense. So it purifies us. And we know from the famous had been a long time. And some say it's not for to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and he was asked by a man who carried his mother on his back throughout hatch. You know, back in those days, before you have the cooling tiles, before you had all of you know, the things that are sprinkling, you know, moisture and things of that sort before you had all of that. And the five star hotels that are around, you know, the
cabinet that look like Gotham City, you know, before all of that happened. He was carrying his mother on his back with his feet burning, you know, in the heat throughout the entire monastic of hatch. And he asks, have I repaid her, you know, have I given her you know, what, what, what I would have given her her do? And the answer was, well, that'd be Tom Cotton was not even with one client at the time of leaving, you haven't even repaid her for that. And a loss of Hannah, which Allah is the one who compensates the believer on the Day of Judgment. So there's from that aspect, also. And also, as I said, I'm particularly talking about a woman and her time of pregnancy. Now, brothers,
we're going to also talk about brothers also, particularly the mother because the mother struggles the most.
You know, there's an authentic hadith from inamoto, the amount of time that was sold lots of a lot more it was some of them said a lot of men How many have either without LRP formula that barely a woman from her pregnancy, to the time of her delivery, to the time of her weaning, she had a tg had in peace of eating that she is in a state of jihad feasibility level. She is a soldier for a loss of habitat throughout that entire process, you know, throughout that entire process, and that's why I sent him said if a woman dies before labor,
if a woman dies before labor, during labor, or during the new fast, she would have died to heat she would have died a martyr and her child will drag her to paradise even by the umbilical cord. She will enter gender she would die a martyr Hello So that's you know, that's an amazing situation to be in obviously it's one that requires you know, much effort and much struggle, but a loss of Hannah Montana is surely not unaware and also loss of the love it was send them also expressed that Amanda no human law also said something very beautiful and interesting. He said that and our companions, meaning the scholars, they all used to say that a woman's do is Mr. JACK at this time is accepted at
this time. You know, because with that with the greater struggle, the more that is accepted, the closer that person is to Allah subhana wa tada as they struggle. Then there is the reward of sacrificing for your children. Right We all make sacrifices for our children, brother and sisters. Listen to this beautiful honey. From it sort of the Aloha I'm Muslim.
Where I told you a long time ago says that a poor woman came to me with her two daughters. And I gave her three days. And she gave each of them a date. And she was about to eat the third one. And then when one of her daughters asked her, she took that date, and she divided it into two, and she gave it to her two daughters. So she went hungry, while her daughter is eight. Now, how many times that we did we sacrifice for our children? You know, there was something that we wanted to do, there was something that we wanted to eat, but as soon as our children put their eyes on it, that was it. Right? It belonged to them. And so I shall be alone. And she was amazed by this. So she she told us
all lost on a lot of money was sent him about what she saw. And also was a lot, why didn't you send them said,
gentlemen, we have here tomorrow genda became her rights. So Pamela, just as the food was the right of the child, when they looked when the child looked at the food genda became her right, because of that date, because of that one day. So even the sacrifices that you make for your children on a daily basis, especially when they're when they're at a younger age, you know, the happiness that you would forego, sometimes, you know, the time that you would rather spend in something else, but the time you sacrifice for them, don't think that a loss of candidates is unaware from them. And that's whether the child is righteous or not. Notice the son was why someone didn't talk about whether
these two daughters grow up to be, you know, pious Muslim as or things of that sort. That's just the sacrifice that every parent will make. Now, if they are righteous, then it goes even further. Right, if they are righteous, then it goes even further. Because then they're your continuous investment. As we said, Everything you taught them, the Salah that you taught them, it's like someone is praying, it's like someone is praying for you every single time, right, you are getting the reward of that every time they say the name of a loss of hundreds at any bother. It is your reward. And it benefits you after death.
All the way through, you know, for your grandchildren, and so on, so forth. Now, the point here is that at what point do you start trying to make your children rights. And that's the that's the issue here. Now there is a reward, whether you raise your children righteous or not, from the very beginning the sacrifices you make as parents, there is a reward for that. But at what point do you start caring about the righteousness of your children, that's really something that I wanted to start out with, to introduce this topic in the first place. Because that's the point of all this, learning the centers and things of that sort, and learning the film, all of this has to do things
that are pleasing to us and kind of what's added, and to have the maximum blessing from this, from this effort, and from what we go through. And a lot of times, people again, they wait until their children grow up to start worrying about their righteousness, right, and then take into a shift and hope you'll give him the Holy Spirit, you know, put his hand on his head, and then all of a sudden, he'll start loving salon, he'll start loving the message, you know, she'll want to wear it not just a job they want to wear in a club, you know, because she got the Holy Spirit one time, you know, one meaning and come to the lights all over? That's such a wrong way of thinking, you know, obviously,
it doesn't make sense. And as much as it doesn't make sense, you know, I've said this in conventions with with 1000s of people, I made that remark and some of the parents are laughing and I'm like, you're guilty of this. I can see right now I know what your kids
you're guilty of this right now. So it's although, you know, it's illogical, and it doesn't make sense. Unfortunately, some people only react when it comes back to hit them in the face.
You know, whenever they see the consequences of their actions, some people are not proactive, some people are reactive, they wait until their children grew up and their children are telling them to, you know, you know, saying bad words to them and telling them to go away and shutting the door on them and not giving them the time of day and the questioning assignments so on and so forth. That's when some parents are like, wow, what am I done with my life? We should not wait for that time. And you know, there's there's a lot of perspective on the Heidi, for example, with the messenger, so a lot of money was set up, set to raise your children on Salah at seven, make sure your kids are
praying at Southern, not just one or two prayers a day, make sure that they're praying the five daily prayers at Southern sunset accounts to even on the weekends at seven years old your children should be praying. I know some loss icmm said what? And at the age of 10, then you need to discipline them physically. The prophets lie someone was not giving was not telling the Sahaba you know, if your kids aren't praying at 10 years old, go smack them around. Actually, the perspective of this is that a lot of people react with the hand in the first place, right? They start slapping right away, and the kids aren't praying. You know, that's the way that they start. They start
disciplining physically from the first place. And what the messengers lies on them is teaching us that if for three years, three entire years, every single day, you are ensuring that your children are praying just like you. Do you really think that would be necessary at the age of time? No. Okay. So you start early, and how early do you start? When do you start trying to ensure righteous children
before marriage to
before that to
you ensure you try to ensure the righteousness of your children even before marriage, the prophets lysozyme taught us or Eliza teaches us how he might ease.
And also, once I'm used to make this dawn, he taught us to make the stop, well, then a habit. And I mean, as long as you know the reaction afterwards, which I never would subpoena him, Allah, Oh Allah grant us from our spouses in our offspring, the coolest of our eyes, and make us emails for the puppy and make us leaders of them without pain. So there's that, you know, what else, the way that you treat your parents,
that's also a way of ensuring the righteousness of your kids because what goes around comes around somehow a lot that, you know, I see some of the things that, that my daughter, Dustin, like, you know, I remember making that same joke or pulling that same thing with my parents. And she's just three, and she's already doing this. Alright, some of the things that, that my Sunday school kids would, before I became a mom, my Sunday School students used to do to me, I remember playing that same prank, when I was in Sunday school, you know, it comes back around, somehow a lot, it does come back around. So the way that you treat your parents, the way that you treat your parents. Now,
obviously, there are exceptions to that. There are exceptions to that. But generally speaking, you will see some of it if you look close enough, in the way that you treated your parents that your children will treat you in the same way. Then getting married, choosing the right spouse, like some of you talked about a man came to blame the other lucky Mama, four month old baby, you know, bring him to the greatest chef of the time, right? Go ahead, make up for her, you know, smack him on the head, whatever it is that you have to do make him a righteous boy. Why not? Tom said it's too late. So what do you mean, it's too late, said you should have came to me before you got married.
Right before you got married. Because the type of spouse that you marry,
the type of spouse that you marry will have a lot to do with your children.
Now, we really underestimate that. And unfortunately, a lot of times, when we're young in particular, we get married for the wrong reasons, or we rush to get married or we marry the person that excites us most. But we don't realize that this is a contract that you're going to have to deal with this is the most important decision that you're going to make in your life after your religion. Right? Because it will, you know, some kind of law and it's not just a wife, it's a husband to having a right to spouse, when you marry someone who you think is going to be a good father, a good mother. And you think about that before you get married. Right? You can't keep trying, you can't
just always try to patch things up afterwards. So looking for those good characteristics, though. And also last I saw them and they have like comments along also last license that either attack them until Dona Dena,
a person comes to you with good religion and good character. So one of the reasons why the prophets lie someone told us we should look for character to is because we should want our children to have good character. So I should see things in my prospective spouse that I would like my children to have the characteristics, I should want my child to have those same attributes, and those same characteristics before I get married. Then what comes after that after choosing the spouse, even at the time of intimacy, the profit slice of them taught us to do before being intimate every time or solo slicing them so that both of the spouses actually, the husband and the wife should make a
lovely agenda sheet one, which a nipple Matos Oksana, Oh Allah put the safe one aside and put him away from anything that you give us as a result of this any of our offspring. Right? So again, we have Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam teaching us even at that moment, you're conscious, you're awake, you're thinking of that. You're thinking of your children. Right? Because the Muslim, the believer is always proactive. He's always thinking about his future. Right? He's he'll he knows, the more he does now, the more he'll think himself later, right? So you're making that job from the very start. And by the way, just so you all know, I'm going to be very explicit, especially when we
get into 50 issues. So please forgive me for that. We're going to we're going to have to be explicit with some of these things. Next after that, it's building a strong foundation and this is where this class really comes in building a strong foundation by taking the steps to ensure all of the sunup Okay, all of the suddenness while you are pregnant, whenever you're delivering, you know, when you're dealing with an infant's when you build that strong foundation, then inshallah Tada, you're not going to have a crooked tree to deal with later on. It's a lot more painful to deal with a crooked tree, but if you grow it right from the start, then inshallah Tada. It will grow straighter.
Okay, now it will be it will be easier to deal with. So building that strong foundation. Now one question that I always get, you know, and somehow I met I met someone, actually, I met a few people that
Want to have children because the world is full of facade. It's full of corruption. And I don't want my kid, I don't want to have kids. And then they grow up to be atheists. They grew up to be homosexuals, or they grew up to be in home, whatever it is, and I don't want to have to deal with that. So I'm just not going to have kids. Right? I've not many people like that. Okay, just say, I don't want to have kids, because of the amount of facade in the world. I don't want to bring them in this world, because the Day of Judgment is, like two years or something. Right. So the world's about to end anyway, I'd imagine if people had that mentality back then. Now, the reason why I address
that issue is because do the sins of the child affect the parents?
Do the sins of the child affect the parents, only if they were responsible for that sin? Only if they fail to do what Allah subhanaw taala commanded them to do? Okay, so for example, Salah, your kids don't pray, and you taught them and you taught them how to break, you did everything at 710. And then you know, they're 15 years old, or they're grown ups now, and they don't want to pray anymore. That's none of your business, you still get the reward. And in fact, you would get the reward as if they had prayed because in the amount of money, yes, you had a good intention. Okay. So the scholars, they say that the only thing the parents are responsible for when the child is in the
house and listen closely, actually, for all of the members of the household, a salon? Well out of
the covering, right, my child needs to be dressed decently whenever you get out, if you decide to do whatever you want. That's your business. Now you don't you teach how to be again, from the very start, you don't come whenever a child becomes a teenager and try to force these things on. That's where the problem always arises. Okay, you're proactive with these things, then if they grow up, then you can say, Well, no, honey has said that, you know, some people try I call it the new card. Some people try to play the newest card, and they didn't know how to be a whatsoever. And you're saying well know how to use and I'm had a bad son, you did nothing like know how to his son. And
you're saying that know how to use the lamb how to Dodson he might not have cared about some.
But what effort did you put into his child? And what effort did Malik put into his child? Right? A lot of parents, Allah knows what effort you put into your child. So at that point, when they grow older, and they become bad, and they make their decisions, that is their problem. Okay, it's not your problem, you would not be charged for that. Some also say, What if my children grow up and they treat me badly, right? I put all of this effort into my children, especially we live in a society where the parents are always dumb, right? Even in the cartoons that you watch any cartoon, that's that show, you know that that's shown on cable TV today, the parents are the idiots in the cartoon.
Right? Go through all of them, just study them. So kind of like the Simpsons, you know, Family Guy, whatever it is, What's that? What's the latest American Dad, the dad, the mom are always just totally out of it. You're being programmed at that age, to know that your parents don't know what they're talking about. So they're not worthy of being honored, some kind of love, they're not worthy of being treated that way. Because your parents are really just unreasonable, you wonder where they get that from? Alright, so unfortunately, we have to counter that influence. And a lot of times it hurts people, when their children treat them badly. And I put everything you know, sometimes I look
at my three year old and I'm serious and talking to him, I'm like, you better not grow up to be a brat. You better to talk back to me, you know, because they don't know the love that you put into them. Right? They don't know the mercy that you show to them all the sacrifices that you make. And of course, it goes to the heartbeat that we mentioned earlier that the believers not tried by fatigue or illness or, or anxiety or distress, except that Allah subhanaw taala It was almost like something even a thorn that pricks the believer, even a thorn except that last kind of tie takes away his sins. But in particular, one had he should really should really, you know,
make us a little bit more optimistic. You know, the prophet Sly Stone taught us that a loss of Hannah without a guarantee of every service, the rights of every service, a loss of time subhana wa tada will show you mercy on the Day of Judgment, if you are fortunate, he won't hold you to all of those rights. But as far as a bad than a god, servants and servants, Allah will make sure everyone gets their rights back. A last kind of animal make sure everyone gets their rights back. So on the server, it means a loss of habitat on the Day of Judgment, he will compensate them for all of the rights in this union that were not fulfilled so much. So that was a loss on a lot of it was going
on. So that's a it's amendment to the either dunya the akuna mina muslimeen. So much so that a believer a servant would wish to return to this dunya and be transgressed more, have his rights taken more because when a lot compensates you, it's greater than any compensation given to you. So loss of habitat and knows what you put yourself through and a loss penalty out of the reward that investment even if your children grew up to treat you ill or your children grew up, you know, not being as pleasing to Allah subhanaw taala as they should be not following the Sunnah that they should be that they in the way that they should and so on, so forth. Also even a miscarriage even a
miscarriage isn't an investment. Even a child that was lost at a young age is an investment. Certainly not handler or the alarm time and we all know the famous story of handed over the alarm, who claimed that you know that he was a hypocrite. And when topple buckle the alarm live on so on so forth. His son was known to not have any choice, he could not have children. Okay, for more than one wife, he married more than once and he was unable to have children. People used to feel sorry for him. And he used to say don't feel sorry for me that I wasn't able to have any children. He said the one thing I wish a loss panatela would have granted was a miscarry child from all of the times I
heard a small slice on talks about the rewards of the parents of a miscarry trying to count all the times that muscle loss I'm talking about the reward of a person going through that distress going through that hardship. Because it's almost like someone taught us in Alabama, does that mean that the greatest reward is with the greatest hardship, the greater the hardship, the greater reward from Allah subhanho wa Taala. So it also was licen upset that indeed, the miscarried fetus will confront his Lord
if he enters his parents into fire, and it will be said to him, oh, fetus, which confronts your Lord, enter your parents into paradise and also lost him said that he will drag his parents into paradise even what will be happening to someone even with the umbilical cord, he will make sure his parents get
support and that's why the messengers have a lot heart he was telling them he said in the heat of Morocco, the love of God is that no two Muslims lose three children except loss of friends, Allah will cause the parents to enter Paradise through the favor of His mercy towards them. And they said the opposite one What about two and also loss? I said and two and they said you also want what about one and he said even one and he said the miscarry child will certainly drag its mother and father even with the umbilical cord into paradise. So it's kind of a lot we have so many different ideas about that. My favorite one and I just did a video on on weekly actually about the miscarried child
and I went into a little bit more detail.
But the headache in the body, where Allah subhanho wa Taala says to the angels, these could see when when the when the child is taken away from a servant. So this is a child in infancy and know that the prophets I send him buried six out of seven of his children, six out of seven of his children so well. So last I said I'm certainly had empathy in this regard. And that's why there were so many I hate losing your children at that early age because of what he went through personally. So a lot more it was Sunday. And it hurt them used to crock right. And I've definitely been out for the love. I know song crying over his son. And he said, Well antalyaspor the likes of YouTube on messenger of
Allah, tala Lovelace and this isn't about questioning others, this is about just hurt. It hurts to go for them. And this had
a loss of kind of Tyler says to the angels have you taken the child is my service? And they say yes. And he says, Have you taken the apple of his eye? Or the apple of his heart? In one narration said yes. And what did he do? They say, hammer that was Tom Jaffe 711, in that alone, I think about your own. And the last panel to Allah says, So build him a home and call it beta.
in paradise building a home and call it the Palace of praise. Right? They told him the house of praise, and also was nice, and I'm certainly happy from above whatever the other one who
teaches that either come up to Sofia woman, Jr. who matters about
that. There is no servants of mine, there's no reward for the servants of mine. If I take if I take his his pure one, his beloved one from him and this dunya and then he shows patience and perseverance and seeks the reward from Allah subhanaw taala except for Jonah. Okay, except for Jamaica. So we have so many different ideas about that. Now we can start getting to the, the and you know, one question I was asked, but what if we just can't have children?
And you don't have a lot? The best answer that I could find is actually the answer of the man was added a lot to it. He said that it's a it's a couple it's not granted children, but their intention for having children was that they wanted to raise righteous Muslims, then they would have the reward to the extent of their intention. So you imagine if a couple says you don't shop May Allah grant us you know, five, six children we can raise to be a father for and and, you know, they can you know, they can be righteous believers and they can carry on our legacy a lot doesn't give them a single one. They get the same reward as people who went through the struggle
to the extent of the sincerity of their intention. So a lot as I said, knows the pain and the suffering of the believer and the loss of penance out of knows what we go through analyst
rewards accordingly. They like now, now we can start getting into the pregnancy. Okay. The virtues of having a boy versus a girl.
I just did a video on weekly on that too called cherish your daughters, we are very backwards when it comes to son and daughter, even in this society, unfortunately, even in our cultures until now, there's this idea that having a boy is preferred to having a girl. And, you know, the first answer to that is it doesn't matter. The first answer is it doesn't matter how long there's a book behati narrates other than Muslims from caffeine have not been for the amount of time who said that whenever a child was born amongst the women of the unsought, I shall would not ask them if it was a boy or a girl. But rather, she would ask, is the child healthy? So how much he would ask is the
child healthy? And if she was told, yes, she would say and handle a lot more,
she would raise a lot some kind of a time, she wouldn't even ask as a boy or a girl. That's the life of the messenger. So a lot of it was on them. So the first answer to that question is it doesn't matter, you know, when you're granted a healthy child, so
you know, you shouldn't even be thinking about that. And the other answer to that is that actually in the sooner we know that having a daughter is more virtuous than having Okay, as well. So as I said, I'm said anyone who is blessed with two daughters,
and he raises them until they reach the age of marriage will be you know, it'll be up to him and he raises them with good tarbiyah yakun that you can attain your Kunal soccer The only thing he will be on the Day of Judgment with me like these two fingers,
you know, and panela think about them, the solar system guaranteeing the same reward that he guarantees for the orphan and we know even with the mother of money, and money is something you talked about a woman that wasn't able to have children for a long time. And finally, when she became pregnant with her husband was in Milan, this is heading up into support and her husband and Juan, and they're so excited and they're happy. And in fact, the people were happy for them because I Milan was the mom of this people. And then Ron died while she was pregnant.
And Ron died while she was pregnant. And she, you know, she assumed when she moved on to a la la would give her a boy that would continue the legacy of prophecy, then we'll have the Enable lock to Helen, it's a girl. I have lots of hands at a sensible level. And Allah knows what you gave birth to. A lot knows it's a girl a lot didn't accidentally make it a girl. When they said that cattle can leave them. And the girl is not like the boy. You know, it's funny, I was listening to someone give a lecture one time, I was listening to a football action in the Middle East, I was sitting in the hotel, and the man was talking about and by the way, the Middle East are not always scholars just
letting you know. That's
that's not an understatement at all.
And somehow sometimes, and one time I was listening to get a hotel, and he was talking about the virtue of the boy over the girl and the men over the women. The whole football was about why men are better than women. And he says, way a lot wiser. Just kidding when he says that guy will carry
on and the boy is not like the girl. It's like you forgot that.
That was the mother of money. I'm saying
wait a second.
But I found a lot of people were very happy about that, obviously, because there's a bunch of men who were being told that they were better than the women.
But a lot of it was that instead of just giving her a profit a lot could have made him a bit difficult pregnant with the Saudis. Right and the story you have one of
the one of the greatest messengers as I see from the money as your time but instead Allah gave her the best woman you know in a lot of stuff accurate the hierarchy was Pathak yada, yada I mean, the best one woman of the women of mankind. And then through her Login your dissertation on
how the blessings that Allah gave her So not only did she benefit, not only as Madame persada Java, but the Saudis and others also herself with a jacket. Right? So we should think in that way. And again, as I said, we'll be allowed to
use to think All right, now we're gonna get into the fifth. Let me make a clarification from now. It is absolutely impossible. I have 79 pages of notes that I've hand typed with different men that have different opinions. I can't sit here and give you every single opinion on every single issue so sometimes I won't be able to I'll try to summarize it and I'll try to paraphrase inshallah Tata email Nadine Bashir, our shift will also be with us inshallah, after so often asked when we do the q&a, so he'll sit with me, so if there's any difference or things of that sort, than charlatan, he can also shed light on that. So we can have more than one perspective. So when I talk about 50
issues, especially some of these are very sensitive issues, okay, especially the first one, which is the issue of birth control.
These are very, very, very sensitive issues. And I actually went through these issues with him to make sure that we're on the same page with them from the law. And the opinions that I present are primarily the opinions of a mathematical theory, which is the assembly of Muslim jurists of America, which include Mike You know, my teachers also. So I'll present it with that.
balance and Chatelet side, I hope the bounce opinions on these issues
when we talk about these things, so the first issue we're going to talk about is the issue of birth control. And again, forgive me because I have to be very explicit when we talk about these issues. Because it's, there's no higher when we talk about being there's no shyness when we talk about the dean in that regard. So there is no doubt in Islam. First and foremost, the point there is no in Islam, the more the merrier. Right, the more children is the most recommended in Islam? Well, it's the last ice and I'm encouraged us to have as many children as possible, there's no doubt about that. Okay. Now, there are two types of birth control that we address here. Number one is permanent
birth control. And number two is temporary birth control. Permanent birth control, is how long by consensus unless there's a serious medical issue.
Okay, unless there is a serious medical issue, or there's something that would cause the woman harm for a long period of time. Okay, that, you know, permanent birth control is head on. Okay, it would be
it would be allowed for a woman in the case where again,
it would only be allowed for a woman in the case where you know, she would never be able to have kids or it would be harmful for her to ever have kids. So it would be allowed to do tubal ligation, I think that's when they,
you know, that's whenever they keep the woman from ever having children of the sex to me, for a man is always held. So the man can opt to do a vasectomy, even if it's going to be harmful for his wife to ever be pregnant. Why? Because this is a situation this is a condition of the mother in that case, not the condition of the men, a lot of what would happen in the future. Right. So the second you would always be held on for the man is never permissible. And it would be hard for the woman again, only in the case where she will always
always be at risk. Right now temporary birth control is where we have the disagreement. And kind of louder I mean, there isn't much disagreement about temporary birth control. There's a Heidi from Japanese not enough, are they allowed time Muslim or Jabba the low I'm the system
that they used to practice withdrawal, the Sahaba used to practice withdrawal even as the plan was coming down. And the point that he was making is that that was their form of temporary birth control. And it was tracked this back then, even in the presence of the Prophet slicin. And even while the pool and was being revealed, so that tells us
that there is an allowance for temporary birth control with conditions. Now, what's the difference between the two and a moment? No, we've seen a lot he says that if a loss of kind of what's added decrease a child for you, even if you're using temporary birth control, the child will come anyway. So it's a precaution. But at the same time, you know, it's not it's not it's not a measure that would permanently do anything. And Allah subhanaw taala could still and you know, it's funny, because no matter the most effective method of birth control still would always say 99% it would never, no one could claim 100%. Right, there's no way to make that claim and the amount of Nobita
Hema, Lhasa, it's a relationship with a puppet of Allah subhanho wa Taala. So whenever you take that whenever you use temporary birth control, you're not saying that I'm not going to have children you're doing you're you're trying to prevent it for whatever reason, we'll talk about what are valid reasons and legitimate reasons you're trying to prevent it for those reasons. But if Allah wants to give you a title, the law will give you a child anyway. And you have to accept that right? You have to accept that decree from callosum conduits, either. So there are conditions to which it is allowed. Number one, it should be by mutual consent.
And this is by consensus is the right of the husband and it's the right of the wife to have a child. So temporary birth control can only be used by mutual consent.
All right, I've seen situations. In fact, the nominal Dean was just mentioning
where a husband wants to force his wife to use birth control, you cannot do that. nor can the white force the husband, okay, this is something that has to be done by mutual consent. Number two, it should be medically safe, medically safe. Okay, so the Sahaba used to practice withdrawal IUDs, spermicide, all of those types of things. birth control pills is where the issue of contention comes up. The thought out of the management of the decision of the management was that
it's with the consent of a doctor and it's determined that there's extremely low risk because it is our fault. If something is an extremely low risk, and it does not, you know, it does not, it's not taken into consideration, then that would be okay. Number three, you should not decide to have no children whatsoever.
So the number is flexible. The number is flexible. Okay, but they're nmsa to get married and from the very beginning tried to say that we never want to have children. That's a problem. limiting the number spacing all of that is what the Sahaba used to use it for. Okay, that's the third condition. All right of temporary birth.
JOHN, I know there's gonna be a lot of questions around all of these things and shall at the end, we'll take questions. What about the concept of abortion?
and Islam is not as black and white, as other religions are. And it's funny because, you know, we're usually the extremists with everything right are portrayed to be the extremists and those that are refusing to give up on tradition and things of that sort. And I remember having this discussion of ethics class in college, and evangelical Christians were a lot worse than we are on this issue. Right? And that's why you have terrorists and let's use the word terrorist because it's an ideology, people that blow up abortion clinics and stuff like that, right? That's terrorism. Now, in Islam, there are three categories in abortion, there's the first 40 days, there's the first four months and
then there's all the way you know, from four months to delivery after four months until the time of delivery. So Islam separates the issue into three different issues into three different categories.
So, for the first 40 days, we is the soul in the body, or is there no soul in the body? In our deed? no soul. So is life conceived. At the time whenever it whenever, whenever the baby is first born, whenever the fetus is first formed? Is life conceived at that moment? No, we don't believe that in our DNA. So there is no life in the first 40 days. So having an abortion, I'll talk about circumstances number one, it would fall under level water or hajer. There are three levels of need and shutdown. There's level one, which is a dire need. There's hajra, which is a nice, but it's not like something that you can't live without, but it's it isn't necessity, it isn't needed, but you
still be able to live. And there's toxemia, which is not a need, it's just come through, okay, it's an embellishment. Alright, so this type of abortion could take place under the law or had
the Aurora is a dire need llorona is there's a threat to the woman's life. The child has some terminal defects, it's not going to go forward. those are those are the rudia Okay, those are dire needs. And it's a case by case and anytime you're going to apply a special case you need to consult with a scholar anyway. Right? I'm just giving the basics of it. So you can have just a foundation and understanding of the entire topic. But obviously if anyone's ever put in the situation, then they need to consult. Alright, so Aurora is that
hajer as we said is a neat, but you could still technically live without. Alright, so in essence, a law is only medical, Laura is never social. Laura is never a social need Neruda is purely a medical, a dire need. And this situation is only a purely medical need. A hazard could be a social need. Okay, so I had to, for example, would be raped, a woman was raped. Alright, and she can and she conceived as a result of that, she wouldn't be allowed a lot of time. That's my opinion, the opinion of money football, she wouldn't be allowed at that point. If the father dies, for example, she becomes widowed and it's still at the very start still, within the first 40 days, she wouldn't be
allowed to discontinue that pregnancy, according to many of them. So there are many ways of that obviously, there's the morning after pill, which is that with that which blocks fertilization and things of that sort, and there's obviously traditional way of abortion, the other condition
is that it should not be done for fear of poverty. That's the main thing right there should not be done out of fear of poverty. That is not the social needs. Hagit in this regard, because you don't know where a loss kind of went to last census list is sustenance. And you're expressing mistrust distrust in the last panel at that moment, so you cannot just say I don't want to have a kid right now. It's still 40 days there's no life anyway, let's get rid of it because we're poor. We can't afford it right now. That's completely not allowed. And that's where the AI falls in what are tough to do oladipo Hachette enough Do not kill your children for fear of poverty.
Okay, nothing was super nosocomial.
We will provide for them. And we will put when we provide for you. Right, so you don't know where that is? It could be because of those children in Los Angeles, right? could be because of that loss.
So that is never a valid need. Okay, then you have the first four months. So 40 days has passed. But you're still in the first four months life or no life.
Is there life in the womb? Yeah. No, no, what's the last lesson I'm said? At what point does the angel blow the soul into the fetus one? Four months? So we're talking about the for four months. Okay. How many weeks is that, by the way? Just making sure you guys are awake.
Okay, good. All right. So the angel breeds the soul in that four months, 16 weeks. So within that time after 40 days, but still within the four months period
of time, it could an abortion could only take place under the law. dire need hazard does not apply anymore. A social need does not apply at that point.
What is a medical need a purely medical needs. So a medical deformity fear of the mother's life or fear of the child's life
okay at that point it would still be allowed
after four months
is it ever the soul is there right? So is allowed at that point
only in one condition under one condition and that is if the mother is surely going to die because in the setup the mother's life takes precedence over the child's life that is the only situation at that point
and the reason being is at that point it is a full life okay, it's a full life the baby is a full life the profit slice on him said that if a woman is a woman's baby is killed after she's four months pregnant, there's the sauce. Okay. It's a full life and also you know, many of the scholars and this is the opinion I hold we can't go into too much detail. Many of the scholars say that if the child dies after four months they still have to be named they should be shrouded and janazah should be free and even the amount of nothing alasa can do I can think of someone just give that pick a meet somewhere just to fulfill that that center Okay, so it's a full life at that point so
you don't play with the child's life after four months under any need.
And also last I saw him said that the miscarry fetus should be prayed for. So this is authentic it from above there was an eternity from an relatable maturity level. So like Sam said the miscarried fetus should be prayed for. So you should actually by consensus of the scholar if the baby so we're talking about miscarriage or abortion after four months if the baby made a sound by consensus, named shrouding janazah. Okay, if the baby didn't make a sound, then that's where half month and a shafr he would say that you have to name it shrouded. It's a full child. Okay. It was a human life at that point. All right.
Any questions about that? That topic? Yes.
Just when we could have covered
Yes, it is a lot.
That's fine. That's fine. Yeah. So spacing out again. So it's a temporary conference contraception,
temporary contraception, it is completely allowed under the conditions that we mentioned spacing, and that's why jabil the long tail angle mentioned hobbies.
And it's very common in the books. Obviously, we're talking about an either in particular that was their only form of temporary contraception was was birth control was that form was withdrawn. One question from the sisters that I'll go back to
but so the morning after pill we said it could be used within the first one
for legally speaking from a salary perspective within the first four months
so I know I understand what you're saying it's only within 72 hours but I'm saying the social needs might come into play so if a woman was raped for example, with with and so she wants to use that, that's fine, that's allowed
that's fine because that there's that's fine. So shift happened last I saw something which is
a continuing challenge. So I'll take like one question one question after every section and we'll have an extended q&a and now let's talk about some of the rules and restrictions for pregnant women. Okay,
getting into pregnant women as a whole number one all blood and this is just known all blood is considered as the holla all blood is considered to have the means other blood Okay, so it's not an adjusted all blood is considered unless there's an indication otherwise. Okay.
So if there isn't if it's a miscarriage, after four months, that would be considered to be fast. Okay, any fast is again the the period in which the woman would not fast and she would not, you know, she would not pray and she would treat that blood like me fast. Okay, she would treat that blood like me fast and we'll talk about the rulings of need fast but otherwise
Any blood that's seen during the pregnancy is to be considered as the habits not to be considered
impure or an adjust, or an injustice not to be considered impure blood. When it comes to fasting, this is a very touchy issue. And I hate talking about it, but I have to talk about it when it comes to fasting, okay, so she has to break her fast if it's going to be harmful to the baby. That's why consensus, if there's, if it's known that it's going to be harmful to the baby, then she would have to break her fast. And in fact, it would be more rewarding for her to break her fast. Although that will determine the underside. Imagine that muscle loss is a loss of Hannah two and a half has has relieved the traveler of half of the prayer and have the duty to fast. And he has relieved pregnant
and nursing nursing mothers have the duty to fast and this is an authentic honey. Okay, so the Hadith are similar sized numbers comparing the pregnant woman and the breastfeeding woman to the traveler in regards to her fasting, but not in regards to her prayer, obviously not in regards to the muscle. Now. So the issue here is obviously, at what point do you know if it's harmful to the baby or not harmful to the baby, because the verdict is really not completely out on this issue.
There's a lot of medical research obviously, that's, that's going on about this issue of fasting.
So in essence, the Shetty did not list. So if you read in the books of filter, you'll find that there are various opinions on regards to you know, whether the author, whether the default is that a woman should faster that she should not fast. Okay? Whether that's the default ruling, okay. And there's a lot of variance there, there's a lot of flexibility, also an understanding that, but in essence, the city out permits you to break your fast. So while there's all this medical research is going on, and things of that sort, and there has been quite a bit of research to suggest that it's harmful to the baby to fast continuously in Milan than it is it's better to be responsible with that
well outside of Ireland. And contrary to popular belief, popular belief is actually most of the evidence, medical evidence is showing that you know, a lot of times people think in the first trimester, it's not that harmful. third trimester would be harmful, actually, a lot of medical evidence is showing that it's actually more harmful in the first trimester. And I'm not a doctor, so I'm just talking about what I've read in terms of research. And that there, you know, kids have been shown to have learning disabilities later on in life. So child might be born very normal. That's just research, obviously, but it's not a, it's not conclusive evidence, the point that I'm trying to
make is, it's not as simple as what meets the eye, right? It's not just, you know, well, I'm not that big now. So I can fast now it's not a big deal. So with that being said, of loss of parents out of game, the other to the woman she gave, he gave the
he gave the excuse to the woman to break her fast.
So consult with your doctor, okay, ask your doctor, right.
And that's the benefit of having Muslim doctor because maybe then, you know, for example, fasting alternate days, or fasting two, three days a week, or whatever it is trying to come up with a plan. So if the baby is still getting proper nutrition, and things of that sort, then do that and show what's on the consult with your doctor about what to do there. I personally don't recommend it, I'm being very honest with you, I don't recommend it. Because I'm not you know, I'm that's, that's just my personal opinion. In that regard. Allah gave the excuse, it's up to the person, whether they want to take that or not. I feel like it's always better safe than sorry. And we do find examples in the
shutout from the Sahaba, where they missed the entire month of Ramadan while they were pregnant. So if the Sahaba took that earlier, if they took that excuse, and there's no reason why we can't six and sisters, you have that excuse, but she doesn't want to make up a lot of days. She wants to fast to three days a week, spaced them out whatever it is to keep the nutrition going to not affect the baby, especially if the mom is in the winter. Right? Ramadan comes in the winter, which is not going to be for a while and the days are short, that's fine. Okay, but the summer days in particular, you know, where you have long days, and sometimes very, you know, tasking jobs or and I mean motherhood
to, you know, just doing stuff around the house, you're very tired and things of that sort. It's probably better to take that excuse, it's probably better to take that
in that regard. All right. Now, as far as making up those fast is concerned,
according to the more intimate position, the reliable position of all four methods you would have to make up.
Okay. And the reason why I say that is yes, you can find a folder from within our bus, the same fundamental bus but still before the moms agree upon this in the market, some of the reliable position of all forms, is that a woman would have to make up that fast and not give Cydia in particular. So giving the the you know, feeding a poor person for missing that fat, although a lot of women would opt out of making out making up the fast and just get fit. That's not the position of the format. That was in fact, many of the scholars claimed it was not on this issue. So I've been talking a lot in a modeling company claim that there is absolute there is a dramatic there is
consensus and consensus and our Dean has a proof. Right? So it's important to be careful with that. Now, what does that mean?
the pregnant woman is most like a person that is temporarily unable to pass not a person who is permanently unable to fast. A person who's permanently unable to fast has the option to just give this video, obviously, they can't make up too fast. And that's where even our boss will be allowed to set. The I was talked about video as an option was partially abrogated when Ramadan came when the command is not fully abrogated. Okay, so she is most like a person who's temporarily sick, and a person who's temporarily sick. And as,
as a scholar says, Don't compare the pregnant woman to who you previously had, if we just mentioned
the traveler, does a traveler pay clip here does a traveler make up their fat traveler makes up their fat. So with that being said, she would have to make up those fasts, that can seem very overwhelming. Hey, I understand that. And a woman wanted to throw a shoe at me. When I when I said that last time in the class, she was very upset with me. And she said, We don't need to be hearing from male scholar about this system, I'm sorry. There's a woman scholar inshallah, that can give you this lecture and that method, then go ahead, I'm sitting down, I don't want to talk about this anymore.
Because I understand it sounds It sounds very harsh coming, you know, for me, that you'd have to make up those facets. But there is an awful lot in this regard, there is mercy in this regard, you can take your time making up those fast, you can make them up gradually, you can space them out throughout the entire year. Fasting, while breastfeeding is not nearly as harmful as fasting while pregnant. Right? fasting while breastfeeding, so then you could still do alternate, you know, two days a week, for example, one day a week, while you're breastfeeding, the permission is still there to make up those fats. It would not, it's not not to punish you, okay, or to overburden you.
Alright, so you take your time making these up. And even if it passes over the next Ramadan, some of the scholars said you have to give fifth, do you have to give expiation, there's no proof for that whatsoever. Along with the fast, there's no proof for that. So there's no reason to burden the woman with the thing, the 50. Also, that's rare person who didn't have a legitimate excuse, did not make up the fast by the next time along. But a woman obviously who was pregnant, or breastfeeding has a very legitimate excuse. So you space out your fast. And obviously, you want to try to get them out the way within the next year, 30 days or 29 days,
you know, and try to space them out over the next year, you want to try your best to do that. But at the same time, there's no evidence that you'd have to play a video at the same time. Another thing also is you should let someone know someone from your close kin how many days you have left to make up. Because also loss of license, I'm setting a date that's
agreed upon, that whoever dies and was obligated to fast let his next of kin make up their fast for them. The issue of disagreement is if something you know Can Can you fast just assume the fast and dedicated to the duck? And my answer to that would be known many right amount say no. But there's this hadebe, which is agreed upon where's the loss? I said, If you missed fast, and they were mandatory fast, then your next of kin should make them up. So let someone know. You know, let your husband know that, you know, if I die, I'm going to throw these fast on you. You got to make these faster for me. All right, let someone know so that they can make these fasts up for you at that
point. So don't feel overwhelmed or overburdened by them take your time and making up these fasts. But again, at that since you're in that situation, you're like a person who's temporary temporarily sick, not the person who is permanently ill.
All right. Another thing is that obviously there's a lot of discharge when a woman is pregnant. So what how does that affect the woman? Okay, it's simple. had that done, which is continuous discharge, a person would have to because
you don't have to, you don't have to feel like you have to keep on breaking your prayer, a woman would simply wash herself clean herself make little, you know, put something to block that discharge and pray for salah and not worry about
it now. Not a lot and some of the Shafir is including No, we know and I say, I follow the humbly school of thought so if I say you know, after the night, and I am a proponent of that opinion, don't be offended. It's just this is the school that I follow in that regard. So I'm actually talking a lot and also the amount of no we and some of the shafr as they said that a woman can combine prayers also if the discharge becomes excessive,
okay, if it becomes extremely excessive, she can even combine her prayers at that point. The other scholars say she says still pray on time, but she just continued to,
to keep something there to keep herself clean to keep her and it's considered how to that which is continuous discharge at that moment. Also in Salah in prayer. One of the concessions is that when the woman feels excessive pain, towards the end of her third track in our third trimester, she is allowed to pray sitting down at that point.
Okay, so she's been given that permission
to pray sitting down.
Now the next one is,
if you go to the doctor, obviously, you're going to be told that you need to take prenatal pills, VHA and prenatal.
Now with that being said, a lot of these pills have gelatin. And
actually, the vast majority of them have gelatin in them, right? So I actually wanted to, I wanted to make this presentation as as comprehensive as possible. So I actually researched pills that don't have gelatin in them. And actually, my wife use these which was nature made, there was a brand called nature made, you go to Whole Foods you get a brand called nature make there is no gelatin. And those prenatal pills also come to that we have different halon vitamin companies. Now, I don't know if they have prenatal plus, nor vitamins and agency, you can check if they have a lot of vitamins, prenatal vitamins, and particularly, no vitamins in agency, but if you're looking for a
brand nature made does not have gelatin in it. So it's not permissible to use gelatin. In that moment, the next thing is the hokum on your doctor, finding a doctor and handler we live in Dallas here, there's plenty of female doctors, plenty of Muslim women, ob gyn that can take care of that.
But what is the preference, the order of preference there. So the scholars say the order of preference when a person has to expose their house
for medical reasons, Muslim woman is the first one. And if you can't find a Muslim woman, then
then a non Muslim. And if you can't find a non Muslim woman, then a Muslim man and if you can't find a Muslim man, that it would be a non Muslim. Now, obviously, you're going to be able to find a non Muslim woman anywhere. Okay.
But I was just mentioning that just so you can have that in your mind, you know, knowing the knowing that the ruling on the order of exposure of alcohol when there's any medical emergency actually for that, you know, just on that note, any medical emergency, if a person has to expose what is traditionally a job, that is the order that they would have to follow. All right. So he ended up being in Dallas, Michelle, it's a huge blessing, just having so many options in that regard.
The next one contentious issue, baby showers.
I get asked about this all the time. And I'm so hesitant, because people get so emotional with the answer. Now, in principle, there is nothing wrong with in principle, don't just put halaal next to it right away and say, All right, I'm not gonna listen to anything else. He says, in principle, there's nothing, there's nothing wrong with it. Because it's not religious in its nature. There's no to shub book because, you know, imitation is and things have been, it's not associated with any religion. And it doesn't compete with our aim. So even the scholars that would say that it's an aid to ads that comes every year its annual, like a birthday or think something of that sort, it doesn't
compete with their age, unless you get pregnant every year,
which many people do, Mashallah.
But, you know, at the same time, it's, it's not unusual. So in principle, there is nothing wrong with the idea of coming together for a baby shower. But there's a few conditions obviously, number one extravagance, this fall off has to be avoided. There's a lot of extravagance of these things. A lot of wastefulness a lot of extravagance just like in weddings. Right. There's a lot of wastefulness. You know, it also puts people in a hard position socially, you're expected to give a certain gift. And you know, if you're given a gift, you're expected to give a certain gift, this is wrong to put people under that pressure is wrong. So it should not be treated like a must, can't get
mad at someone for not attending a baby shower. Specific Practices, practices that are specific to the cultural baby, cultural baby showers, that we have, should be avoided, Specific Practices should be avoided as much as possible. Why? Because they're showing that they're doubtful matters. Okay? So you should try to avoid the specific practices.
But in essence, if it's just a gathering to give gifts to the mom to prepare her, for her baby, then it's fine. But I want to make a note on that.
It's much better to do that. So giving gifts to the mother, you know, helping them prepare for the baby is a good thing. But it is much better to do that after she gives birth to the baby. A lot of times I've seen that happen. It's heartbreaking. The baby shower is done, you have all these gifts all over the place. And then you know, the baby dies, the psychological, the traumatic effects of that, you know, it's not something that the city I would want, obviously. Okay, so, we should not we should not want that to happen. All right, so it's better. So it's better not to do that to people to give the gifts before and have this party before it's better to do it afterwards. One time, just
bring your gifts maybe you can combine it with our paper, right? It's good for the people to provide gifts and you know, help them other preparing things.
So again, in principle, nothing wrong with it, Specific Practices should be avoided. Okay, and we should try to eliminate the non, the non Islamic practices and it's better to do it after it's better to do
After, because then you'd also be fulfilling as soon as that point, which is how helping the new parents is actually a form of pseudonym. As we'll come across, right, the Sahaba would help each other out giving gifts afterwards is actually a sin. Okay.
Also in the last trimester, in the last trimester,
many of the scholars, particularly any mathematical himolla, from the Maliki school, they say at that point, a woman can only dispose of a third of her property, while the person does their will. Right, they can only a loss of Hannah to Allah has already designated two thirds of everything that you own. One third of it is what you own right you can you can give charity with that, you can designate some of it to your family, perhaps you want to give, you know someone who is getting a share a larger share. So you can do whatever you want with that one third, some of the writing that they said that was the last I saw them said that a woman in their last trimester in her last
trimester, because she's so close to kind of lots of death, especially in those times, you know, you don't have the hospitals and things that we have today. Right, the advancements that we have today that she's so close at that point that at that point, she can only designate one third of her property. I'm not saying I agree with that opinion, I just find it very significant, just to mention it.
But there is no authentic critique that I could find, at least that would that would designate that when a person is following the medical school, obviously, they would be bound by that opinion. But just to show you again, your your if he had a T, you know, he hadn t sub et la, you're in, you're in a position of being a soldier of a loss finds out that you're being pushed, close to death at those moments. And it's very important to keep that in mind.
What are some of the things that can be done during pregnancy?
Number one is that children can hear things in the womb, right? see people with their headphones and stuff like that walking around playing stuff on their iPad, or iPod, or iPad, or whatever it is, letting them listen to all kinds of dad's music,
symphonies and stuff like that, to try to enhance their brains, they also have a lot, it's, it's been medically proven that when the child is in a traumatic environment, I was listening to
a doctor talk about this a child psychologist, when it's in a traumatic environment, one's hearing, yelling and screaming all the time, even when it's in the womb, it'll come out and it'll already kind of have that attitude, right. And we'll already be traumatized a little bit from everything I'm hearing on the outside. And you find that in the time of the sun up, but the moment of pain.
He said the Scylla used to recite the Quran, to the child, even when the child was in the womb.
Okay, they would actually recyclable and to the child, even when in the world. And he said, especially in the voice of the mother, because that's the relationship obviously, that's going to need to be the most the strongest and one that's going to need to have the most trust in it and things of that component of trust. So in the voice of the parents, even the mother or the father also but hearing the poor and in that voice, so you don't just put a face on your stomach what you know, you recyclable and to your child's kind of love while the child is in the womb.
And there are no particular suitors for that. So I've seen some websites like recite every day. So with the fact you have 45 times to your child
read flow a lot, I had 17 times all of that, as long as I'm sorry, just reading in general, is a good thing to do reading onto your child while the child is in the
city knocking on the water. And he said that a person should make the child familiar with the name of Allah subhanho wa Taala before the child comes on, so even speaking to the child about the loss of hands out and making them familiar with a last name, so Pamela even if obviously, they're not going to come up, you know, like a Sati to sit up and say in the Abdullah
it's not gonna happen. It doesn't Mashallah, but, you know, we'd be pretty impressed with just Baba, you know, or Mama, you know,
but still just preparing the child and having a good environment around the harmony around the child, not lots of yelling and screaming and stuff like that, okay, having harmony in the environment, even while the child is in is in the stomach, and obviously making up for the child's righteousness and help. You know, think about it. This is the time where you really need to step up your game.
Okay, so engaging into
not just making up for a gender shouldn't be doing that. Making up for righteousness for health. Okay, and go for Zachary. Honey Salam when he made your app before? Yep. You know, he's in his 90s. And he's making doctor a lot for a child before I even told him that. Okay, I'll give you a child. He's already asking Allah subhanaw taala for all the qualities of the child. Right? Yeah, definitely. We already coming out Iacobucci da da da. He's already talking to a lot about how he wants his child to be. Okay. So maybe your app for specific things. You know, make them hot that allows a panel to add a grant to you, you know, a scholar make the app that allows parents
Allah grants you a dynamic that allows pantai and makes your child special or the pleasing to Allah soprano to make their heart that alone makes your child intelligent. All those things may go after that, be specific, don't wait to see the child and then decide then how you're going to make that for the child. Make them for specifics, even while the child is in the one.
So that I'm gonna go ahead and break for questions, inshallah. And then we'll take a break, we'll come back for three o'clock yesterday.
Hey, it's better to maintain consistency. So if you if you have the excuse to sit, just
yeah, if you're gonna, if you if you don't know, if you're going to follow, you're going to be dizzy or things of that sort. So for example, if you want to pray, like if you think you can make it to that, cause without getting dizzy, and it's not harmful to at all, then you can do those two kinds of send them that way. But you know, it's better not to just be alternating so much throughout this one.
If it's consistent, that's what I'm gonna do as much as you can, that's fine. But you have the permission. If you have the permission to sit for one.
You have the permission to sit throughout. If you're not able to stand for the entire salon, then you have that permission. Yeah.
Have you talked to the doctor about them? things of that sort.
That's why Mashallah women are Jaya dean at that time.
All kinds of stuff happens, right?
I'll go one brother, one sister. So yeah.
Is it okay to ask for a daughter or ask for a son? It's okay.
It's okay to ask for It's okay. You can say it's wrong to ask for a gender. Just don't be disappointed if it's a girl.
I've never been to a baby shower. So I can't give you too much specifics on, on what you need to avoid. But I mean, obviously, you know, just things that are that are very specific, like to the culture, they're super hot. They're doubtful matters. Right? So bringing flowers to a wedding is okay. But you know, when you start doing like specific things like turning around and throwing in whoever catches it, like when you do that kind of stuff. I've never been to a baby shower. I have no idea on baby sharks, but just avoiding specific practices, because they might fall into that folder.
So that's all so just having a get together to plan for it. That's fine. Not being extravagant. Again, it's better to do it afterwards. But it's fine.
there's no, like, there's a heartbeat.
Know, you don't throw it away in garbage. I mean, you still dispose in a reasonable way. But there's no soul at that point. That all has different from the physical preparations and things of that sort. The soul is different. This thing you
know, you don't name at that point, you don't do that.
Actually repeat questions, right? question was about the child dies before four months. So you still you're obviously not gonna throw it away. You'll still dignified the fetus. Right? But you're not going to name it and do genetics and things of that sort of
You assume it has.
You assumed that it was more because you take the safe side? But you haven't you're either the thing you build upon with certain. So if you don't know if it's four months, it could have been four months, maybe a day younger a day older than you would take the safe side.
Yeah, obviously. Yeah. I mean, the sun up didn't used to have like, ultrasounds and stuff like that. And you do you make your best judgment and you assume you always want to be you always want to want to err on the side of caution.
What's done? Yes, and the blood will be any fast at that time. You're assuming fully that it's a four month. It's on the border. You're assuming it's a four month old baby
who raised their hands first.
because it's a harder time
now because a hatchet so the question is about deformity and things of that sort of if the child has serious issues, and it's still within the four months.
Right, then at that point it still, it still falls within hagibis still allowed.
Sisters question. Yeah.
Did you guys tend to wilt apart last night, but we'll get there.
So yeah, in reference to the will, in a will. So right now if I want to give all of my money to my daughter, because I feel like, that's fine.
But once you're dead, you can't say my will I want to give everything to my daughter. At that point. It goes to the divisions that a lot of times as made inheritance. So in essence, at that point, my medical team Allah said at that point in that last trimester, then you're like that person. You can't just give everything up because you're afraid
you're only allowed to designate that one third. Yeah, I'll do one more question and we'll take a break and yeah
that's it miscarriage regardless, but the fetus has the soul after four months. All right. All right. So we'll take a break inshallah. Tada, probably 10 minutes.
Give people a chance to refresh themselves. I think, do we have any refreshments outside? We have tea and refreshments outside in Charlotte. So we'll reconvene
at 305 and
reconvene at 305
so we don't even know what
Getting your help
16 weeks on the sonogram
my answer was
after three months
so you should have treated wasn't epic
So that's what you should be writing. Yesterday there's someone that asked this question that can you just write that on me distribute it
said no, it has to be written out precisely the way you know not the way he wants to the way
that's the way it needs to
be based on what he wants.
the people who are going to be
they have to be given their
I mean all that.
So that's what happened
yesterday This question was coming
on my show now
because they are
So one thing
she's a provider
everything's the same as long as
the tables have
a number of attorneys and
sending out and I will be working at
creating a form and all the questions that came yesterday, typing them out.
Face Thank you.
I mentioned everything
I guess in the area of the fast
I focus on
I have to take your brother
Let me just talk about get back
No you got some you have something
when a green is dead
you are inhaling
so here's all you already
I mean once a machine so pretty much when the machine is the one that's
because I my mom she was
like what do you do
I know my
some doctors came
time doesn't matter whether it's one hour two hours or because the night before
great fourth one which
will take some time to take some time
to get ready
I gotta find where all the wires that I was wearing
there's this one
nothing too heavy
okay so far I
start getting in traffic and stuff like that.
So if we can have everyone back inside themselves so we can get started.
Sorry for the first session was a little lengthy.
All right now 111 Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah.
So let's continue inshallah. Alright, so we've gone over some of the things that you need to do during the pregnancy. The fifth key aspect of it and also some of the things you can do to benefit the child inshallah, before the trial.
I was born. Alright, so now let's go ahead and let's get to the time of birth. That's where most of the questions usually come up. All right, the time of birth.
Number one, remember your job is mister job.
That's the first thing. Remember, your job is mister job. So try to use your try to force yourself to pray at that moment. I can't even imagine how a woman would try it that moment during delivery. But try your best. I mean, if you can squeeze in, while you're delivering, then salata. That's a good one. And don't make that against your husband.
Might be a little something at that moment. All right. But no. Again, this is what No, we don't even last thing is that the more you're pushed, obviously, what will also inform this, the tougher the time, the more precious to do absolutely try your best at that time. You had a question about that?
husbands, so husbands don't think don't pass out. Don't get scared. All right, shall she'll go back to being normal, she won't always scream at you that way. And she didn't mean it. Everything that she said, just remind her to make a
reminder to make.so where did
to get one.
All right. So the time of birth, obviously, the time of birth, my son told us that every time the child is born,
that shape, you know, the child is poked, if you will, by shape on, in the sense that the shape on the shape, one is already declaring his his his enmity for the child even when the child is just born. And obviously, when whenever we're approached by the shape one, when we feel lots of the shape on we say I would have been lying in the shape on Wednesday, and actually was the last ice on set for that reason, the mother of Nadia when she made the dock and she said well in need to have the Caledonia to have enough say
that I seek refuge in You from the safe lawn for my for my daughter, and for her offspring that whenever she made for her child, and for the offspring of that child that her daughter was so sincere, so genuine, that aligns with that answer and of its support for the love
and money. And so we're born not crying. And not because there was something wrong with them. But Allah gave them so much peace, that when they were born, they were not crying, obviously, you'd be very scared if your baby's born not crying, but with them because of the peace, the last panel that it gave to them because of that of the mother. So obviously, you're making them out to a loss of
you know, the amount of his IP law. He said something that's very, he said, transferring realms is always hard, going from one world to another. Right? And he likened it very beautifully, you know, to the way that a person would go from dunya, to Bowser, to that to the realm of death. Right? No matter how good you are, there's still you know, you can't, you can't really know everything that you're going to expect. So totally different realm. It's a totally different world. And that's why it's traumatizing.
It's traumatizing in its nature. But a lot makes it easier for the believer. And being raised from Bethesda, to the world of the afterlife is traumatizing. You know, it's, you know, the people that would have been punished their entire lives in the body is often that realm of death with a weight and on the back of a hand who woke us up from our sleep. So it's traumatizing. You know, it's because they're seeing a whole nother world. So you're going from one world to another and it's not really very traumatizing. So you make the art to Allah subhanaw taala to make it easy for you, right to make it easy for you. And you make the art for your children also that a last kind of tie that
makes it a smooth,
smooth delivery. And I'm loving that bus with a lot of time I know he says when the lines it just doesn't go on in their head. They know who Sabine we guided into the path in Morocco and mecca for either he'll be grateful, or he'll be ungrateful. He said, it's literal in the sense that literally Allah guided you out of your mother's room. And somehow when you're studying medicine, I haven't studied medicine, but I've heard this frequently said people who study medicine, they just say some kind of law. How do you not believe in a law when you study all the processes, everything that's going going, you know, into this sophisticated creation and then everything that can go wrong at
birth, and still the baby is born. Right? So Allah says in the head, a novice to beat alone makes it easy for you, He guides you that path and he guides you the path of Islam also. So it's it's in the literal sense and coming out of your mother's room. And it's also in the sense of loss as I shows you the clear path, he guides you to the clear path, and you can either be grateful or ungrateful to a loss fantastic as a result. So a lot of things can happen at that moment. It's important to be grateful to a lot of time and you make the answer to Allah subhanaw taala to make it easy for the child. And that's why the first thing that you do when the child comes
I was what? Right away.
Okay, now, then very softly
All right. Don't scream at the tile.
Don't try to you know, don't try to sound like them. I've been at the huddle a lot like about a lot, you don't do that. Okay. But somehow, like you take the child and you sue them with a remembrance of a loss of Hannah Montana.
And this is narrated by an author and nothing different and soon to be dealt with authentic hadith that I saw one person with a loved one who was born has an IQ 92 Falcon little below on the profit slice on took and hustle and he uttered the event in his right ear. So he quietly made the event and is right here in a soft, soothing voice. Okay, not in a very loud voice. So the event is made in the right ear. Although there is no authentic hadith about the common the left ear, many of the scholars said you also do the right and the left ear. Okay. So there is no Sahih Hadith per se, but but it is many, many of the scholars said you do do that in the right ear, and then you'll turn around and
you'll do it to the left to try to do that. Brothers in particular, hopefully, you're not passed out by them. Try to do that right away. Okay, just take the child and it's a very touching moment. It's really, it's beautiful.
I will love you. I'm not lying, my daughter was born. That was the only time she wasn't crying. It was like the first and the first two hours of her birth. When I did that in her ear. She got quiet and
then she went back to crime.
And obviously, the way that they treat the baby, those of you who haven't seen your, you know, the way they treat the baby in the hospital, it's like it's like being in a factory or something like that. Right? So it's like
it's like, whatever. They're not they're not really paying attention to me like are you sure that's okay?
Like they're packaging tees or something like that. Right? But they're packaging a baby. Let's apella it soothes the baby remind them of a loss.
So during the event in the right ear, the soft voice don't terrify the child from the very start not hustle and bustle
was also attributed to Li said look at how powerful this is. You come into this world with a van but no salon. Right? You come into this world with an but no salon, you leave this world with Salon but not with them.
Right. So the time of your life is like the time between salon between Atlanta and salon, just a short period of time, the time of your life is just like like the time between done and so you have to make the best use of that. That's very powerful. We come in with a done we leave with. Okay? So try to do that right away. And we find you know, this these moments and this is where I said you know, every time one of my friends would have a child to get like 2030 text messages. What do we do now? What do we do now? What do we do now? Because there's so many nice soon and that you can extract blessings from your child at that time. And we saw the Sahaba had this keenness right they
would take their children to the Prophet slice on them right away. So what was that Ashanti for the Allah finally said as soon as I had my son and guanine, we ran to the Prophet site setup. And it says about his mother and a son. The medical the alarm says mother Hussein will get law when she had a son named Abdullah immediately requested a soloist license, because they wanted to get the most out of the pregnancy. They wanted to make this the best. They wanted to start off on the right, you know, on the right foot as much as they possibly
could. And you know, we find some narrations in that regard. One of them is that when the listeners made hyjal when the Muslims made hits and on the some of the people in Medina, some of particularly the Jewish tribes in Medina, the ones that were at, you know, at war with the Muslims, not the ones that were at peace with the Muslims, particularly some of the Jews from Venezuela, some of the Jews from Medina, were on good terms with the Muslims, for those who don't know, all right, particularly some of them from Venezuela, they said that we placed a spell on the Muslims and no one's gonna have kids here.
So no one's gonna be able to have kids. And so in the first few months, some of the Muslims believe them, unfortunately. So there were a few miscarriages here and there. And so some of the Muslim started to think they were cursed. Some of them thought there was actually a spell on them. And then there was a child that was born six months after hits. Well, does anyone know who that child was?
I'm loving this debate on the 11 first child born in Medina, after his widow, who are his parents, obviously, as a bit and who else snapped me back a while the 11 what are the 11 so I'll be back it'll be 11 When that happened, he took the loved ones away. And he literally paraded him around the streets in Medina and started and was chanting Allahu Akbar, right because it shows that the that the spell wasn't there. And some of the Muslims didn't believe it was because the spell they just thought because there's a different climate. You know, they all of a sudden came from a very dry lands are very warm. They thought it was different climates that would be hard for them to have
children. So that obviously disproved that idea that there was a spell.
And that's not what the law says that we then brought out the lovers of it to the profit slice on them.
And we placed him on his lap and the profit slice on him asked for a date and also lost a lot while he was alone. he chewed that date
and he had some saliva. So he chewed that date with his own saliva and then he rubbed the two dates on the roof of the mouth about the lameness available the line so he chewed a piece of data, and he put it on the mouth about the love of the love is available the alarm, he rubbed the date on the roof of the mouth, about the love and is available the amount of time and that was the first child to be born to a stamp. So this is called technique.
technique. technique to handle is whenever you take the date, you choose the date and you rub the date on the roof of the mouth of the child. I'm more explicit Heidi
is from Anasazi a lot of times I know that. I went to the prophets I send them with with my brother this step brother was Abdullah
was a stepbrother. Okay, his mom, and so they had Abdullah and again so we said that the prophets I saw them was the first one to be introduced to Abdullah so they took out the lots of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam and also lost why Santa was outside, you know, tending to a camel. And also last I saw them, you know, whenever he was requested to come, he came and he held the baby and he said to me, do you have any dates with you? And I said yes, and I handed them to him. And also last I saw him he moisten them with his tongue. He opened the child's mouth and he rubbed up the date on the top of the child's mouth and the baby started to laugh so the baby was happy. Loves happy sleep. He
started to smile. And he says also loss Isom smiled so widely, that the back of his teeth shows little celestial Iceland was happy and a soloist. He said Uhuru will answer a lot tomorrow. Look at the love that the unsought have for addicts. Right. Because the unsolved live around the you know, Mashallah Medina has really good dates, you haven't eaten real dates, until you go to Medina. Okay, the ones that we have here, even California for those of you that live in California and stuff like that, not real dates. All right. But Pamela, so the problem is, my son was happy. And then he said was a matter of luck. He mentioned, Abdullah, so the Prophet sighs I'm actually named this child of
the luck. The point is, again,
you don't have to necessarily to the date, okay, but you make a piece of data. Don't sit there and try to stuff a big majority in the child's mouth and choke him. All right, take a piece of data, you make it soft. Can you chew on it, and you rub it on the roof of the mouth? This is following the signal. And the scholar said anything sweet can work as a replacement. All right, but let me let me Please let me just talk about that for a little bit. All right, you don't put flour or osmolyte or anything like that child's not anything sweet. They said in the absence of dates, Michelle, other dates everywhere. But what this does is by the way, there's medical research, Mashallah that has
shown that this actually stimulates the child's immune system, putting that little piece of data in the child system, that sugar, the little bit of sugar, it actually stimulates their system, so it's actually good for them.
Now, traditionally speaking, some of the scholars said if you don't have dates, what do you use?
But that's actually a terrible idea.
And it's not to say that because it's not necessarily from the sooner some of the scholars just thought that naturally, if you're not going to use dates, then you use honey, but there's actually there's actually been plenty of studies confirmed that using honey can actually can actually hurt the child very much if you give the child honey within the first year. Okay, of the child's life.
It's called infant botulism i think is the OT ul is a high pronouncing
botulism with a CH there. Okay, so you shouldn't put honey even if you read some of the traditional books they use honey if you don't have they don't put honey there. Okay. And also for the woman,
what are the laws of contestation?
Right? Allah subhanaw taala gave her dates
and warm water
right last time I gave her dates and warm water so we can take from that that it's good for the woman awesome. And by the way, again, medical research has shown that it replenishes the woman you know calms her down. It's kind of like replenishes for dates are an amazing
they just have amazing nutritional value. They have amazing nutritional value. So it's good to replenish the woman at that point with dates and drinking water. Alright, so that's what you're going to do right away. Now the next thing is obviously naming the child. Okay, naming the child. I'm gonna offend some people when I get to naming the child because some people might have some of the names that I'm saying that you should not name your child. All right, so please, if I see everyone look around, and look at one person like
never gonna call you by your name again.
That's not my intention. My intention is to talk about what's the what are the best names to give? Okay, so what what how do you name your child? What's the process of naming your child? That first question is When do you name your child?
So traditionally, you know, they're not used to say the seventh date is the time that you named the child. So the best time because also last name and hasn't 100% on the seventh day, okay, on the same day of their article, the profit twice on name and have some represent so some of them said the seventh day, but that doesn't, that doesn't mean it's set in stone because Sahih Muslim, and I said nomadically a lot of time, and he said, that was the last I saw them said a boy was born to meat last night was a native label him and I named him to blame. So he was born last night. So the province obviously named him before seven days. So the only reason I mentioning that is because you
can name them at any time. All right, in our society in particular, it might be kind of awkward to have just a baby without a name for the first seven days. You can name them even before the child was born. That's okay. All right, but the profit slice on name the child
one night later. Now, what are some of the guidelines for choosing the name? Right? First and foremost, all names are permissible unless something is objectionable without them, it's important to understand that so you can choose to name your child anything. That's not objectionable. But we're talking about the best names, the best names,
the best names to a last kind of talk if you're having a son, obviously, or one
of the lot, and I'm so lost, and I'm so happy to snap. Beloved names
are Abdullah Abdullah. And he actually said, if not an awful lot, and
well, we'll talk about what the prophets I saw him did a lot of. But when he was a part of the line and heard that from the Prophet twice him he named three of the sons of
the love and
then he named three of them I've given
the big one, the middle one and the small one.
So Pamela, that just shows you their keenness to fall this summer. You know, I'm telling you, you know,
I don't want to actually I'm not going to have to be very careful with a sister that I know. Okay. wanted to name her child, her daughter Fawlty.
And whenever she wanted to do that her relatives, so hey, Debbie said Robert, this isn't a theme that's old name, you know, why don't you name them something new like flavor to it, right? Like the daughter of the prophets, Isola, right the keenness to follow the signal. And that's why By the way, if you go to the Middle East now, very few people are now naming their daughters and their sons after
it's very rare now, there really is no, it's very rare. It's not how long to name and other things, but it's like looked down upon. Okay, why are you doing the same old thing over and over again? Okay, but look at the Sahaba is keenness to follow this phenomena of dominating three of his kids.
So, that's the first thing there's there's another category of names which is the absence of anything about them anything or Emma, right, I'm not too long or so on so forth. There's a weak heading the province like some sub any of the names that have herbal D in them are our beloved names are the best of names. Okay, so we can eat but some of the scholars still acted upon that they said it's good to name your child.
Something, you know, an established name of the last panel Tada. So having a Buddha there, okay, having the servitude of Allah subhanaw taala denoted in there, these are just good names. Again, the third category is the names of prophets and messengers, the famous one was giving these categories kadal sauce by some actually said someone so sercombe has not name your name yourselves with the names of the Prophets. Okay. So for example, what are the properties? My son named his son?
Well, he, you asked about that question about why didn't he named his kids? One of the problems like some have most of his kids
before why he was the only one after why. And this loss is maintained after his father, father to my son loved about him is his father, there's a very close relationship. Obviously, no one is like the problem or like the problems like,
he looks like panela What's the last lesson looks like about him. So he was even created with the same physical appearance. When he saw him he was shocked when he saw me as someone that he looked like, he resembled him.
And there's no greater profit after also lost money. Okay, above and beyond the father of the profits. Alright, so he said, name your children after the MBA. And of course, the fourth category is the names of righteous people.
It's good to name your children after righteous people. Whether they're so hot or even, you know, even some of the modern day righteous people that we have, or you see someone who has some some righteousness in them and you want to name your children after them. That's, that's really that's a nice thing to do. Okay, it's a beautiful thing to do. A lot of times people ask me why I named my daughter Mae, right? I'm a wife. And people think I was just trying to cop out you know, I didn't want my daughter to have too much of an Arabic name so she could blend in. You know, that's why I named her maiden name.
After my mother
I thought my mother was righteous I named after my mother. Several hacker that if you know I thought so righteous woman, so you named after righteous people, you know righteous people, if you the names of the Sahaba fall in that category, it's good to name after that. Right? It's good to name after them forgotten who it was, I think
Yes, as well the allow I was talking about him and thought about the allowance. So as the waves that Paul had named all of his kids after profits,
I named all of my kids after Shahada.
All of the kids of his COVID were named after shahadat. So our beloved Isabella was named after our beloved jack. Right? Most of them this is where he was.
Right? He named all of his kids after Shahada. So you want to name your kids after righteous people. And then again, names with good meanings. Okay, names with good meanings that you want your kids to have, obviously. Now, obviously, you know, sometimes people like, you know, I named my kid.
I named my kid a good name, like I named my kid. That's what's one of those. There's, sometimes people have had the opposite character of their name.
I named my kids like, you know, something that has, you know, denotes leniency, for example, he's just a crazy angry, bully. You know, what happened? All right. I mean, I'm not playing him. Allah said, it's not the name that makes the time.
But it's the intention behind the name when you give them that.
Think about them. I intend on naming my child his name, because I want them to have those characteristics. You're making your app by naming your child you're naming the child is because you want them to have those characteristics. Right.
And that's why for example, the name Mohammed. Okay, now I know that almost everyone now from the subcontinent thing,
but it's really and you know, what's sad is that in some countries in the Middle East Mohammed is like the way that you you degrade someone right? from it. You don't know someone's name, Mohammed, Mohammed. Right? You call someone Mohammed, it's like, kind of belittling the name in a way right. But Mohammed, you're naming after the loss of a lot of audio, some beautiful name. And how many of you know what nominal is? Are these names
you know, it was it was it was a Mohammed right, that was just kuhnian Mohammed his his name was Mohammed bin Mohammed, Mohammed Mohammed, Mohammed Al Azhar
five Mohammed in his name.
So it's beautiful naming after the prophets naming with good names.
Obviously, you should avoid names with that meanings. Okay. names with that names. Unfortunately, people think of xenical on that it's a good name. No, that's not the case. Because there's sometimes a lot of times talking bad about someone. You know, and we have people named zania. Sometimes right? adulterous? You see, like some terrible names. I've met people that have the worst names, like, why would you do that to your children, you know, naming them after bad name. So don't you know, don't just name them any Arabic word that you can find them say, you know, I saw it in the study the meaning of the name, First, make sure you don't name your kids with
meanings. Some of the names, you know, when I was living in college, some of the names that I see.
And even an impulse name, by the way, even some of the names are just like really, really bad names. Like they have bad meanings, like you have people like that are named, like Angry Alon, like xylon you know, you have all kinds of names. It's like, what why? Why would you do that? Like, I understand it's the tribe name, but if you're naming your kid that way, you're gonna name him right. So anyway, good, good meanings. Also names which are exclusive to the disbelievers exclusive to the disbelievers should not be used. So you know, things that are that are biblical, but not from not from the center they're not names of prophets, for example, things that are that are exclusive to
them. Okay, so you can't you shouldn't name your kid for example, Christian, obvious, right? You wouldn't name your kid Christian. Okay. Are you want to name your kid Paul? All right. Those are things names that are exclusive
Okay, and names which only belong to a last kind of what's on and cannot even be used as an attribute. So you can I've seen some people name walking around turning your child's life not only a lot can be
can you name someone kidding?
Yeah, because a person can be generous. A person can be Corinne, but a person can't be allocating. Okay. You can't name your kid call him.
Okay, the sub Dewar I mean, what's up Kent? You don't want to name your kitten with the Kevin because pride with the human being denotes that right?
Well, Haman could do so there are some names of Allah subhanaw taala that are specific to him that are limited only to a loss penalty and even their attributes are not given to human beings. They're not to be used for human beings.
also named with names which denote enslavement to anything other than a loss of time. Okay, so we still find people named abdon nebby for
All right where I'm doing something else okay I've done anything but Allah subhanaw taala is not allowed okay and names which aren't excessive in praise excessive and praise so for example some loss Isola Safa girl's name who was
not Baba like outside Dharma means free of sin, and also lost by some teamster named designer. Okay? Also, and I know this one is this one might be a little offensive and the amount of no he used, his name was more hideous. He hated that name, he refused for people to call him. In fact, he said when he was dying, I forgive I will forgive anyone for any wrong they've done to me. But those who call me what you mean, I don't forgive them more, he then means the one who gives life to the dean. He said when was the dean dead.
So he didn't like the name or anything from so he considered it that for yourself, right? So, you know, change it to like mold or something like that. That's a changing situation. But anything you know, that has the dean in it, like I've got people named like Saison,
and Halo dosha. And like stuff like that, like the best of none the Master of Creation, like we should not go overboard in praise. And obviously, when you follow the Sahaba
when you find this a habit you do well with that anyway. Alright. Now the next thing in regards to naming
the middle name, the middle name should be the Father's name, why a lot of justice, the room the other who are upset or angry and a lot. And so that adds up a lot.
outbreak there only about him. So to
call him by the by the names of their fathers, that is more just to last. So obviously, we don't live in a society where it's been this bin that bin this bin that you don't put vendor events and stuff like that, you have the last name, which is equivalent to the puppy the name, if you will, the name of the tribe, the name of the family, but it's good. I'm not saying it's saying it's good. So then, just to fulfill that tradition, calling by the names of the fathers, it's good to make that the middle name then the middle name, it's best to make that the Father's name in that regard. All right. Now once you have the child, if you want to congratulate someone who has had a child,
and by the way, with anything with with Dean in it, it's not how long, it's not how long I'm saying some of the scholars did not like that. So for example, I've been saying to him a lot. What's his name? Sorry, your dean, he said that I personally am not a fan of the name. He said that I don't want to I wouldn't change it because it's not about me and my mother.
Okay, so it's not that you know, so again, like if your name do something with Dean at the end, sometimes it can be excessive. Sometimes it can be excessive, not always. But whenever it's like, You are the one you are the nobility of the dean, right self Athena, those types of things. Don't change your name. Okay. But at the same time, if you're naming your kids, some of the scholars disliked. That's all I was saying. Right? Now, if you want to welcome a child, if you want to congratulate someone who's had a child, and I recommend to everyone, I do this in every class that I teach, to have the book fortress of the Muslim heslin Muslim, it's the authentic dots where every
single situation in your life most situations in your life, it's a very good book to have, there's an app for it, and have it on your iPhone, and now on your joy. Okay. So download it, read it, or go to Google, if you want to beat Google going to Google's traditional now, go to Google and read the docs you need to from fortress of the Muslim, but the draft of welcoming a child property as now we're talking a lot right down to the authentic idea that a lot will occur, FEMA will be lucky, or Shackleton will have a short definition. What was the bill? May Allah bless you with his gift to make the receiver give thanks and reach the maturity of yours and be granted piety. And the response
to that is that a lot about a colleague, which is that a lot of hate on what has offered the love of this law? What is up what is that? Like? I love the lava. May Allah bless you and shower his blessings upon you. It's a tongue twister, I'm sorry. And may or may He rewards you well and bestowed upon you dislike and reward you with open hands. So it's an authentic honey. Just get it from fortress of the Muslim if you have to. And if you don't know what to say to say just like a light on someone tells you Congratulations.
On that part.
Also, generally speaking, making dark for the child. I found this very significant there's a hadith from Mali.
But it is narrated in the hotties book of manners.
he narrates that while he says that when my son was born, I invited several of the Sahaba to a feast and I said them and then after that
they prayed for me and my son they made do out for me and my son so this is how that made doc for me and my son. And I said you have great And may Allah bless you for your prayers and I am going to pray a poodle I mean to say I mean and he said and I made you out for my son. I pray
For his, for his outcome for his mind and so on. And how does that mean? So it's a very nice thing that people would make up for the title.
So even in these gatherings and things of that sort of your baby shower, there'll be after pregnancy. So it's not really a baby shower, right, whatever it may be. Make do after the title. Okay, use it as an opportunity to make the offer.
Alright, any questions on that? I got a circumcision.
circumcision will make you all forget everything that's talking about. Yeah.
After the name of the melodica, the names of the angels.
Yeah, so you should not Yeah, naming a daughter Malak would not would not be something that I'm not saying head on. But it's definitely under dislike, after the names of the melodica. Remember that some of the scholars have reservations with them, because none of the Sahaba name their kids.
Some of the Sahaba didn't. None of us know how they did it. So he said perhaps they didn't like to name after an angel, perhaps but it's not how.
If you forget what
if you forgot to give them a date, just go home and like, take a date and corner and stuff in their mouth? They were doing the sun the noun?
No, so it's just
not to do anything.
Don't put the date in your mouth. entirely.
Sister? Yes, sister?
Yeah, sure. So calling Abraham for example, right. You know, Abraham isn't
one of the ways of reading what could be kitabi Abraham, in short about and some of so Abraham says, it doesn't matter in what dialect you say the name? Yes, you can name. In fact, you can name them purely. You could choose to name your kids in any name whatsoever. And in fact, by the way, when Congress comes with, like, your name is sister Nicole, right? When Congress comes to Islam, I tell them, it's better not to change your name. Because it takes away the foreign aspect of your soul. That's why some didn't change the Hobbes's names unless they were objection.
That's fine. You can name the English the English name, you can do that. You can absolutely name them by the English name of the problem.
Should you wait for the baby to be washed? I don't know. I just I like rushed. Like, let me do it that the sooner the better. It's not a requirement that you have to do it like right? It's coming fresh out the stomach.
sooner the better. sisters? Yes.
Well, the naming of Satan is deceiving because everybody has a say it's pretend it's supposed to mean that you're a descendant of the prophets. I saw them right. That's why people do say it. But
I personally doubt that everyone namesake is a descendant of the prophets. But
it's okay. Make your parents happy. You don't have to do what you got to do. I personally tell you know, it's good to name your kids after your parents too. It really makes them really happy when you do that. There's nothing wrong with your parents name. It's good to name your kids after your parents for the money. Last question. Let's go back to talk.
Knowing the gender before the baby's born. Now, there's nothing wrong with that.
I'm personally one of those people. I told my wife I was like, Look, I don't want to wait a day later. When we know when the gender is able to be determined. I want to know I want to prepare myself mentally. So hamdulillah we knew the agenda very early. Alright, I'm gonna go back to the topic. Now we go into circumstances the reason why I'm not going to give a break now it's because there's at 430 so we're gonna break it like for 2425. Anyway, Are you guys okay? If we continue? Do you want a five minute break? Okay, you guys are okay if we continue right? All right. circumcision to 10 stop. Okay.
Number one, we'll talk circumcision for boys is between Santa and salt.
Either so number five, according to the scholars, it's either recommended or mandatory.
Well, here it is to them, as we know was the one who was given the sun that this is very Buhari, a Muslim, circumcised at the age of 18. And that's why any amount of him will have for example, said that it is
Okay, that it was in my opinion that it was fun. And he was the only one that held up that opinion from the 40 bucks. Even my boss at the time, had a saying that is very, very, very, like, very extreme and not extreme in the sense like we're calling him whenever you, you know, an extremist or something of that sort of dynamic considered it very exaggerated. He said that if a person is not circumcised, and there's no slot and no hatch, so he went to, but they said he was exaggerating the importance of why, because bajada is obviously an issue with the person purity is an issue for boys not circumcised. Right. So circumcision is done for the Hadassah loss license included in the
categories of The Hobbit.
So in anatomy, Rahim, Allah didn't say that, but he but he quoted him an apostle of the law on that too, just to say that he thinks it's, it was mandatory. And he said, but so even in my mathematical concern, somebody said, if an adult hears for themselves, they don't have to do an adult's fears for themselves. Okay, they don't have to do it at that point. All right, the point is to hotta purity and good hygiene. Okay, that's the point of the circumcision. Okay, because when there's no circumcision, and by the way, it's very, it's not identical at all, even totally secular research has shown that it's not high genic at all, when you don't do circumcision, you know, you're talking
about urine and filth and all those types of things.
You know, not being not being prevented effectively. Alright, so for the boys, it is cinnamyl academic, according to the majority, I was just mentioning, you know, opinion, just to show you how emphasize it is there's a brother who came out tonight he was telling a story, he said that there was a brother who someone who became Muslim. And as soon as he became Muslim there, you know, some foreign students and they told him right away, we got to go get you circumcised tomorrow. He's like, Are you crazy?
Tomorrow, first thing in the morning, you have to go get circumcised. And he said, I don't want to be Muslim done. He said that they said to him done, then if you go to a Muslim country, we're gonna cut your head off. So I said, what kind of Deen do you have that if you entered or you leave it something's getting cut off? What is? What is it about your religion?
It's it's, you know, it's something that is cinema accurate according to most of the scholars.
According to Amazon, Allah. Now, many scholars said the circumcision should not be delayed beyond seven days. Okay, should not be delayed the onset beyond seven days, it's on the basis of a week
that we can eat, please don't trip over the camera.
It's on the basis of a week Heidi. That was the last I said I'm circumcised a testimony for saying when they were seven days, deep is not authentic. But some of the scholars thought that the best
amount even Kodama him a lot. He said that admin said that even though you don't have to, there's nothing that texturally binds you to circumcise a child before seven days. So the earlier the better, because it's easier on them. So the earlier you can do the circumcision, you don't have to wait till seven days. The earlier the better. Obviously, we know that it's less painful in that regard. And now we're looking at the law said that the timeline becomes obligatory after puberty, and it becomes obligatory at that point. to him. Again, it was it's necessary
for him along with somebody who follows.
He said that it's obligatory before puberty, because the obligation is upon the Guardian, not the child. So if a person reached puberty and it wasn't done, then they, at that point, have the choice, if you will, they fear for themselves and things of that sort. All right. Now, I want to talk about female circumcision for a moment. Why? Because there's a lot of misconceptions surrounding it, not because I'm encouraging in any way whatsoever. But because of our ignorance on the topic. islamophobes have capitalized on our ignorance of our own text in regards to female circumcision, particularly my shift she had she was practicing was one of the highest ranked physicians in this
country, also most European PhD in Sharia
law because, you know, Pamela Geller and her group actually targeted him and said that he was he was a pediatrician, that he supports female genital mutilation. And the Muslims didn't stand up for him. He never said that he did not support it at all. He covered the text which talks about female circumcision, what it means and because of that, it cost him his job and his medical license. Okay, so it's important for us to know and this number folks, you know, and when I posted that, by the way I posted on Facebook, I remember I was getting all these comments about, you know, oh, we're against that anyway. What does he think he is and talking about that? As far as what female circumcision
means? Now, first and foremost, understand female genital mutilation is how long no doubt about that. Okay. So as far as female circumcision is concerned, within the books, it is between allowed and soon
All right, even hesitant, ask Kalani rhodiola han Rahim Allah He said that there's all of that Hadith that talks about it are weak. So there's no strong Hadith about it.
And most of the scholars, consider
circumcision soon enough for the men only they considered allow for women. Now what the prophet SAW A lot of it he was set up did allow, what would be considered female circumcision for the Prophet is not removing anything from the clitoris itself, but rather from the foreskin. And the prophets. I sort of made that very clear, therefore does not it's not mutilation. It did not harm, it does not harm the woman at all, it does not harm the girl at all. Okay. And in fact,
the American Academy of Pediatrics, they wrote when they wrote on the topic from their journal, they said that this which is called the ritual, Nick, original Nick, which is trimming from the skin, but not from the clitoris itself. They said that it's no more of an alteration than ear piercing. It doesn't hurt the person at all. And that's what the prophets I said, I'm allowed the prophets did not allow any form of mutilation or taking from itself. And in fact, the reason why this becomes this is predominant in one of the predominant in the safaree method, not because the mom Shephard he held this opinion on chemo lots. Okay, which is actual genital mutilation. It happens in North
Africa, and it's predominantly his method. It's because it was a fear it was a custom from the pharaohs.
Okay, it was it's fair on a custom to actually remove
female genital mutilation. And when the school have any amount of salary developed, obviously, sometimes the dean doesn't alter the custom, the custom alters the dean. So the custom took what the nominal salary said, which was that was sued not to do the ritual, Nick, and they applied it to that. And that's why you have a problem, legitimate problem, which we do speak out against a female genital mutilation in the Middle East, particularly in North Africa in some areas. Okay, but it's not from the dean has nothing to do with Islam. It's not some it's not even about genital mutilation. And it's, and it's actually, even the circumcision itself, which is the ritual Nick is
just in the back. So you don't have to try to do it in America in any way whatsoever. All right. So just for islamophobes, if someone asks you about that, I know it's not even an issue here, because no one does that over here anyway.
All right. Well, we do have some viewers from Middle East, right now, Africa, South Africa.
The majority says some
losses is mandatory. Because of some loss, I said, I'm sad, the child is a hyena as a captain until that data is performed, okay, which means that all the blessings that come with the child are held as a scholarship until the Africa is performed, why because is necessary. Most of the scholarships in the lack of them
has an embassy and I thought they said, even if you're an old man, and it wasn't done for you, they said, we've known some of the Senate who did it for themselves. They just did it for themselves just to do it for themselves. Some rotten agenda. He says that also lost my son and said every child is in pledge for his article, which would be slaughtered on his behalf on the seventh day, and he should be saved and given a name. So that Africa cannot be done before seven days. Okay, it should be done. Preferably on the seventh day, or after the seventh day, on the seventh day, or after the seventh day. I shouldn't be allowed under says, If you can't do it on the seventh, do it on the
14th. Or do it on the 21st. Right, that's the best is to do it within that same equation. But anytime after the seventh day is fine. All right, there are no specific portions, according to the majority in the peak of the way there are industry. So it's not like you have to designate one third, for charity, one third for as a gift and one third for yourself. They say there is no specific portions in Africa for the most part, some of the scholars said just out of the US, it's good to follow that same equation, though. Anyone make sure, in essence, make sure that there's a portion of your ticket that goes to Southern, right, make sure that there's a portion that goes to
select or give something in South Africa. As a result,
can you just give charity instead of doing it?
Can you just give charity and just call today?
What do you guys think?
No. Okay. So that I think is still can take place, but you can you can have someone else do the slaughter for you. So in any country, whatever it is, if you want to appoint someone to do before you, that's fine. All right.
Yeah, so you can feed people from the optica you can give it in charity, you can do those types of things. It's fine. So you can designate the portions as you want. Obviously, make a share of it.
No matter what. Right?
That's my next topic. Why is it two sheeps for a boy and one for a girl and by the way, two sheets for a boy one for a girl? There are camels, cows, goats, this is all allowed. Okay. camels, cows and goats. I know some people like to go.
So it can be two sheeps for a boy, it should be too cheap. Sure, boy, one for a girl. And you can give extra so it's not like you're limited to that so you can slaughter it more. Alright, don't be stingy. If you're having a faker
and you got a bunch of people come in, don't just slaughter one.
Do your best to accommodate
but you can do more as extra Okay, now what's the difference? Why two for a boy and one for a girl most of their intimate their reasoning for that they said that it's the share of inheritance of the Son and the daughter so as simple as that sharing the son is twice as much as the daughter has nothing to do with gender because the mother and the father you guys have heard you guys attended hopefully the inheritance lecture last night mother and father watch their show
one sixth and one six right they both get the same share it has nothing to do with gender but the boy the assumption here with the two and the one is that the boy is going to be the one that's going to have to provide for the family if it's not that way then the equation does not apply then the girl is given more to accommodate and things of that sort so this is and by the way it's not was the first religion to assign inheritance to women period. The Bible does not assign any inheritance to women All right, no religion before Islam ever assigned inheritance to a Lost Planet it gave that to the woman and the woman does not have to spend on her family from that it's just for her whereas the
man is mandated to spend okay upon upon the women of the household again, if the tweaks and changes then it's taken into account but the article some of this most of the studies they said it's the same way as the inheritance two for two for the son, one for the daughter. And interesting fact as probably this is just I noticed this also
muscle loss I sent him when he slaughtered for it hasn't been the same he only slaughtered one for each.
Perhaps some of their enemies said that the profit slice of them doesn't you don't inherit from the profit slice.
Right? inheritance the inheritance of the profits all goes to sada so that's why some only slaughtered one for testament percent each. And that's what that's an authentic tradition. Okay, so it's, it has to do with inheritance. Another thing about Africa cannot be shared according to the mathematical amount. According to Anita and some of the properties, you can share it but it's better not to if you can afford not to meaning if you can afford, you know, each one does his own. So meaning if there's more than one person that had a child, they shouldn't share the pika. But if their financial constrictions, things of that sort, obviously, it's in America that to them anyway,
to those scholars anyway.
Imam Shafi in the cinema like them anyway. So it's as soon as there's some flexibility with the cinema, but again, only if you can't afford it, it's better. To do it for yourself, whenever you slaughter, you say Bismillah Allahu mahadasha min cap went up in the name of a lot of a lot. This is from you. And for you had to heat up the tattoo funan This is the peak of so and so. So you've mentioned the name of the title. That's just the pseudonym. The only requirements for the article to be valid is the intention. Okay, the intention is there accounts those are fake. So you don't have to like call up like a charity organization and say I donated this Are you sure you slaughtered in
the proper name, the intention has to be there, even if the name is not mentioned, okay, the intention has to be there. Also, it showed the a lot of time also the animal should be free from defects. So just like the animal should not have defects, obvious defects,
that's going to be sacrificed. And it's recommended to be of age six months. And it's just like, again, out of out of analogy, the same restrictions of military it's better to apply them to the attacker.
Also, I saw the alarm on has said that article should be Judo done, which means the bone should not be broken on the on the animal that's been slaughtered, only the joints would be broken. So you would serve it in a way and there's no reasoning, it's just to follow this on the left hand side there on the profit slice on the doctor, he didn't break the bones of the animal, just from the joints. So people would take from the meat, but they would not break the bones themselves. Okay. She also says, well, the love and have that in the days of janelia when people would slaughter an animal on the and the reason why I'm mentioning this is because some people do this custom and it's from
the days of jeconiah seven when people would slaughter an animal on behalf of the newborn baby. They take a piece of continents take the blood of that animal and they rub the baby's head with it after saving it. This is still done in some Muslim countries. Unfortunately, not so it's disgusting to write. I heard someone say
I saw the liner said it's a practice of jacket. Okay, so there's no rubbing the head with blood. That's disgusting.
Another ruling here is
Can it be combined with the effect so for example, if you have to slaughter an animal anyway, can you combine the intention of optica with both here, according to the amount of a mammal hanifa Yes, mostly mama bossy, they said because the intention of the odfi and our Pico is the same to get closer to Allah Subhana time and it's the sacrifice on behalf of the family. According
To the molecules on the shaft, it has to be separate. Another ruling on the article.
It is best to make your article open to the public. Because also loss is one of the worst. And this is why Muslim the worst food is the food of the walima to which the rich are invited to the exclusion. Of course,
you should not make your app pick a specific it's good to just serve it. For example, in a Masjid or an open gathering don't exclude people from the applica that devoid Baraka, devoid of the feasts develop even weddings By the way, you don't just invite people that you think are going to pay up.
You open your wedding as much as you can.
Funny thing about that I made my wedding open the people had it announced on the hopeless and stuff like that. And even without some people were really offended. I thought we'd get a personal invitation.
I came back from scratch five days before our wedding.
Shaving the head and giving the charity
giving the soccer club that shaving the head of the boy is so not by consensus. So not in accordance with all the schools that send that to shave the head of the boy.
Also, on the seventh day, is most preferable. Okay, but it can be any time after the seventh day doesn't have to be the seventh day for the girl.
According to the majority, it's also similar to save that of the girl. According to him, I'm talking a lot and this is the opinion I follow personally
that there is no authentic hadith about shaving the head of the girl. He said that the only Hadith which is that Fatima the allow shave the head of Lucasfilm and Xena is a week of events.
And actually, some of the Maliki's acted in accordance with that because he might not have narrated that these are some of like the later scholars of the medical school they acted in accordance with that they said the non Malik gave that ruling on the basis of that. So like we've been I've been loving others they said also the girls had is not to be shaved. Because most of the US have the default ruling is that a woman's hair is not to be cut short or shaved. And so there's nothing to say otherwise, there's no authentic narration to say otherwise. I personally did not like he actually considered it.
Just like to shave the girl's head. The later somebody sent it to me. It's, it's permissible to save the girls. But it's not like shaving the head of the boy. That's what the later scholars of the comedy school said. And that's fine. That's the most balanced opinion. Okay, that you know what it's you can if you want to, especially I know like you know, a lot of people say if you shave and the roots grow stronger things of that sort you can, but it's not like shaving the head of the board.
Whenever you do shave the head what should you do with the hair? Give it give it its weight in charity and silver give its weight in silver and charity. Now does that mean you actually have to take the hair, put it into a scale weights and then try to see what the silver rate is and give it away? No, you can just give it's literally like two $3 of charity solid that's symbolic in its nature. You don't have to sit there and wait anything. Okay, but you should give some sadaqa some charity as a result. You don't actually have to weigh the hair all right, it's just a small price of charity is a sign of gratitude and the last
was the last ice when I'm sad and I hate Muslim you start with the right you finished with the left Thank you saving the head of the child you start with the right you finished with the left and you would just stay busy and not before you start
a barber can also do it if you don't want to do it that's totally fine there's nothing wrong with a barber barber doing it read it upon them. And he and you know even making the car lane. Okay. When was that making the the morning and evening remembrances reading them on your children, okay, until as the scholars say until they're old enough to learn and recite themselves until your kids but even when they're young babies still there until they're old enough to where they can repeat. Alright, and they can start to read for themselves and read those themselves. You should make that you should read the last three clues and you should read the morning and evening remembrances but especially
the last big books, morning and night, every time you put your kids asleep, rub your hand over them read those three sodas over them, because it's a means of protection. So like I said, I'm also used to teach us to save upon our infants and upon our children who are local now. We tell the naughty law hitter not including a hammer
that I seek the same way the mother of money I'm made out to a loss of Hannah Tyler that I seek refuge in Allah subhanaw taala from the safe one.
Worried lucuma you in particular so you're making doc for the child from the sideline and from every evil eye in harmony and one who wishes Armani so reading that, again, fortress of the Muslim doctor to make for your children's look it up. All right, the topic of urine also comes up
You're not just or is it not not just is you're not just
for the child.
The boy and the girl not just means the pure, the boy and the girl, the notice is impure. But also loss. Isola made an exception for the boys urine, that you don't have to change the cloth, you can just sprinkle sprinkle water on the area that the urine came on. Why? Because the boys urine is a lot more wild. And it goes a lot more places than a girl's urine does. So it was a concession in print. But the conditions for that is that the boy has to be unweaned, he has to be breastfeeding and the only thing he's getting is milk once the boy starts eating anything other than milk, that concession is lifted. But it was to make it easy. Again. And that felt about that awesome hope that
I was telling you about that I heard and released the scholar was saying that, from the football from the virtues of men over women is that their urine is not.
Like are you see?
Yeah, so it's because, you know, obviously a boy will reach many more places and boys more wild. And I've had this confirmed by mommies. Mommy's like you have confirmed to me that boys urine is a lot worse than girls urine in terms of where it goes and stuff like that. So so like, it's still not just the hokum hasn't changed. But as soon as I said, you could simply sprinkle water on the area, you don't have to sit there and try and find every place that the urine touched and things of that sort right
now, in the last 20 minutes, inshallah we're doing good on time, actually. And then we'll do q&a after
the topic of breastfeeding.
All right, well, so last time I mentioned in, you know, the Hadeeth, where it was mentioned that the angels took him and he saw some of the punishments of the people. amongst the people that he saw punished were women who denied their children, milk, breast milk, those who denied their children. Okay, so it's haram to deny your children from them. Even if you don't feel like it's how long to deny your children. That right. That's one of their rights on
a Lost Planet. Allah says, well, habitable office, Idaho said
that the caring of the child and the breastfeeding term is 30 months since Pamela, there's a bigger argument that because there was a woman at the time earth model, the long line that had a child that six months.
And some of the people assumed that she committed adultery, you know, she got married, you know, and she has her you have a child and six months. So I deal with the 1100, he made the excuse for her, he suffered a loss of sanitizing the poem or Hamlet, all of this, all of
that is carrying and his breastfeeding term, the child's wrestling term is two years. Okay? So two years is 24 months and six months is how long the baby has to be inside. So in essence, a Lost Planet, Allah has given a minimum, you know, a baby typically will not survive if it is born with under six months. So that's what loss parents are saying. Okay, so the breastfeeding term is two years, the breastfeeding, but I'll explain that in a moment before you guys get
a little upset about that. All right.
Just just for the hookman. Breastfeeding, also breastfeeding within two years, within the first two years on five separate occasions, establishes the relationship in the sense that if a child is adopted, for example, and they're under two years old, breastfed more than five times, or if you breastfeed your niece or nephew, or whatever it is, then you become the mother. And your husband becomes the Father, for all, you know,
in terms of all legal rulings, and things of that sort, so you become, in that way, the husband becomes Muslim and things of that sort. So it actually has legal implications there. So it's not good for people to just be breastfeeding, right.
Five times breastfeeding within two years within the first two years, makes the child the son or the daughter of that woman. Okay.
It's a rite of the baby upon the mother, as we said, it's permissible for anyone to breastfeed. Muslim, non Muslim, it's permissible for anyone to provide that breast milk to breastfeed, but the Sahaba hated that an unrighteous woman would breastfeed their children. So even like when they had wet nurses, they weren't able to provide they look for a woman or righteousness, even though there is no legal implication there. All right, but they look for a woman of righteousness. Allah subhana wa tada mentions the breastfeeding Terminus with the worker as two years also. But what is the last times I see a lot of
whoever wants to complete the term of what we lock complete the term of breastfeeding, right. What does that mean? breastfeeding is a right of the child upon the mother for two years. And if the mother cannot provide, the mother is not able to provide breast milk, the scholar says it is the right of the child upon the father, to hire a nurse who can nurse the child. So it's an absolute right of the child for those two years.
And by the way, the World Health Organization, this is amazing. The World Health Organization, the report that was released in 2011. They said that the that the optimal time to rescue the child was two years. In quote the coroner
The best amount of time the best term to breastfeed your child for is two years. Now, within those two years, does it have to be exclusively breast milk?
No. Okay. So there are elements that you can start to wean the child off by mutual consent after six months. Some said after eight months, the point is that you can start to give them solids. The point is you're giving them their nutrition, you're developing them and you're not, you're not forbidding them from that breast milk. Okay, so you can start to wean them off. It doesn't have to be an exclusive breastfeeding diet doesn't have to only be not for those two years. All right. But it is certainly healthy for the child. It's good for the child medical research has shown that. And by the way, many, many, many children die every single year. Last year's report, I read this online from
the World Health Organization last year, 46,000 babies died because they didn't because they used formula instead of breast. There's something that just cannot replace what a last punch on us. But you know, for the time. Now, if you have to use formula, you know those types of things, that's a different story. But to just opt for formula, you should try your absolute best to nurse the child. Okay, you should try to exert every effort to nurse the child. It has been shown formula does not give the child what breast milk gives the child it's as simple as that. Okay.
And can breastfeeding be done more than two years with a child?
Can it be done more than two years for the child?
Yes, okay. It can be.
In fact, you know, I've heard from I always ask my, you know, my parents mentioned this to me that some of the smaller villages in Palestine for example, someone breastfeed their, their children, you know, till four or five years.
And my dad's very, was very embarrassed about how long I found out how long he was wrestling, but you know what I'm like, you know, my dad's a genius. Mashallah.
So he's just a genius, and everything. Like I consider him an all around the atom, if you mentioned anything to he has, like, why do you know that? You know, why do you know about this topic?
Because there's really something special about the quality of the milk that the mother has for the child. All right.
Again, fasting, you can fast. Also less ice on gave you an excuse not to fast. But here in breastfeeding is different than with a pregnancy if you're still able to provide a healthy supply, and you can fast and it's not exhausting. It's not causing over fatigue, then you still should, you should fast so you can really alternate the days here, two days a week, whatever it is three days a week even you can even make up what you miss during your pregnancy. All right, the last last topic here is an ethos, postnatal bleeding. Okay?
So the woman during her postnatal bleeding in her postnatal period is excused from prayer and fasting.
Okay, again, she should make up fasting in her own place. She cannot fast at this time, not like pregnancy and breastfeeding where she has the option she cannot fast.
And, in essence, within ethos,
and by the way, there's a huge Lachman, this, you know,
what they call postnatal depression, postnatal blues, and that kind of stuff. It really does exist scientific brothers, we should know this. Women are just depressed when they have children. Okay, it's scientific, they're depressed for for some time after they have the child. It's a kind of luck. It's real. So last time, I made it easy for them from excusing them from prayer and from fasting in that regard. Still, you can still make, you can still read or
you still are able to pray in terms of supplication and invocation report on and things of that sort. The only thing of course, is that you're excused from the five daily prayers, there are three stages of NEPA are that are discussed within the realm of an ethos before deliver delivery, during delivery and after delivery. Okay.
The chef raise consider only the bleeding that comes out after delivery as fast as possible.
All right, the HANA fees animatic is considered the bleeding that comes out during an after delivery as part of the new house. So during the delivery also as part of the new class and after delivery.
All right. And some of the some of the scholars from the hamady School considered the bleeding that would take place a few days even before the delivery.
And they said up to three days before as part of any fast, okay, according to the gym for the majority, any blood that comes out before the delivery for sure is not any blood that comes up before the delivery is not part of the class. All right, so it's posted the postnatal period after you've delivered. Now, how long is the new us?
laws in the US? I already mentioned
40 days this is important to know what if you're bleeding more than 40 days
What do you do?
42 days, 43 days? What do you do?
Right? Do you stay not fasting and praying? Or do you start bringing fasting?
Okay, now according to him, I'm a mom of a hanifa. And this is the most correct opinion alongside Adam. In terms of the narrations, we have a shortage of time. So I can't really go into detail, anything after 40 days as to how that's just other blood. So 40 days is the maximum period of your manifest. Okay, so the maximum period of your new fast, the only way that it wouldn't be considered the maximum period of uni fast is if it coincides with the height of the coincides with irregular scheduled periods industrial cycle, then you would consider that you do your best judgment.
Okay, this was also the opinion of Abdullah Barak, his house accountability, activity others and there's a very,
you know, clear how the from that regard publica would narrate.
From it sort of the A lot of times that we used to not regard the discharge, brownish, and yellows discharged after the after the end of the period as being of any significant so it was just considered staccato, Is this considered other blood? All right, so 40 days, is how long did he fast last? No matter what. Right? Charlotte island with that? I hope Did you guys find this beneficial?
learned a lot. Okay, under elaborate. I mean, I hope to make this beneficial. Before I go to a lot that awesome q&a. Those of you who are attending online, and those of you who are also here,
a few things. Number one, if you notice, this was a free class, that we made it free, we have over 1000 we have 1300 viewers online, we have many viewers online, usually for a day seminar, you know, that would be 20 $30 $10, whatever it is, we wanted to make this free and open and we're just counting on everyone in chat, let's add to support this organization to support the Islamic learning foundation of Texas so that we can continue to have these programs. So I encourage everyone to inshallah, tada, donate whatever you can, whatever the value of the seminar you got, you know, or you felt as if you want to donate something, it would be very appreciated. Again, I'm counting on
everyone to do with your part. We just wanted to make this open the light, I was like, You know what, let's just make it free shall and let's just, there's more balconette there's so many couples and things of that sort that are in need of this. So inshallah support the organization so we can continue to have these programs. The link is also at the YouTube stream, so you can share this with everyone. Do me a favor, honestly, this is a favor to me, because I hope there's some benefit in this and I know a lot of people are ignorant about these types of matters not not, you know,
not out of malice or not intentionally, but just don't know about these things. So please share this with as many people as you can, inshallah. And also, I'm going to have a class that starting online on February 12 inshallah, every Tuesday, it's going to be a four week class on the Tafseer of sorts, and
it's going to be February 12 at 8pm. starting February 12 at 8pm. Every Tuesday night in Sharla. At www dot m Flix calm I lm FLIX or I lF texas.org both of them go to the same website. Also, for those of you that are in Houston, there's going to be a class you can find more information about some of the classes in Houston
there's one on March 9, called the station of the Divine I believe that's on the data decided came by Dr. Overmyer Anjem on March 16 here in Dallas inshallah we're going to have a class on called marked for greatness marked for greatness. How many of you guys attended the first of the month? I did. Not many of you, if you subscribe online to on for an influx membership, which is $10 a month, you get access to all the previous classes. So I did the Tafseer of the first 40 is sort of Nadia and I'm doing the next 25 inshallah tada which talks about marked for greatness the characteristics of the MB and the Prophet so that'll be somewhere in Dallas, do we determine the location
at Richardson Okay, it'll be in Richardson shall that's good for me, I don't have to go anywhere. All right, in Richardson inshallah, March 16, just keep up inshallah, tada For more information, and there's a lot of content from the lab line. And again, we want to open this up to the public, we want people to benefit as much as possible, we want to be able to keep these projects going. So please, inshallah, either follow, follow us inshallah, on online on Facebook, Follow organization, Facebook page, you know, keep up with classes inshallah. And hopefully, by the way, Chef Nadine, you know how this all came about? I was we had an anonymous meeting. And I saw him the Dean was on
Tuesday, on Tuesday. So I was like, I was telling him I was like, you know, I'm in town this weekend. How about we do a class on, you know, pregnancy and newborns and stuff like that? And I know epic is the place because Mashallah the sisters here, Mashallah very active, you have a reputation so keep up that reputation. So
100 I really want to thank you all for the turnout online you know, it's only three days of advertising over 1000 people benefited from this class. So does that mean well for those of you who are online, keep in touch keep online until after selected awesome, which is in 15 minutes inshallah also some 10 minutes after slot Lawson we'll be doing an open q&a inshallah. So we're not done yet. I just wanted to mention those things for those that have to go after slot or those that are logged in now.
We'll go ahead and we'll take a break.
So we take questions I'm
sure one questions and then we'll take a break.
Underwater delivery, what if it's all permissible? There's nothing to prohibit.
Anything that suits the woman is fine, nothing wrong. because
everything's permissible unless it's proven to be impermissible. So tell them we'll come back we'll take questions please stay till after a stop loss and ask a question that does happen to all of you for attending.
70 although only one hamidah
first of all,
for those who have come and also from my side on behalf of the entire management, I want to say
I left the program
as mentioned earlier and announced prior to the q&a session will
Once again, just go back to the same setting, and
just wait for a knock on the door or something until we shall before we start
we'll cover what people are gonna ask
for joining us even
just like we have other projects like why Islam
This is an educational project to educate community inshallah, and the goal of Iran is to fuse knowledge itself is so shallow, most of the
programs that we provide, they have some practical aspects, as you can see on this one, and you know, that can lead to some action that we can do for the betterment of society. So, there are basically two kinds of classes we do. Number one is on site classes, just like just like the ones that we are attending here, mostly, they are one day classes six hours. So we did one in Irving
Park one blessing inshallah we'll be doing
on March 16. In Richardson.
So, we did about six, seven seminars already and these seminars are all uploaded to our portal that is a monthly subscription. So, you can pay $10 and all the seminars that are done are recorded there, and then you can access them anytime. The second part of the
educational method is online classes. So, we try to do every month we do one class support next class online, we have
about 600 to 500 sometimes and so to be done, we do it on different kemetic topics. So one of them is shift is doing is doing a series of different surah. So you need
to have topics coming challenge every 13 and then you also need about 20 slides.
So about six seven topics we have already done and we have some more scholars coming in joining as instructors.
We have class.
And similarly Dr. O'Malley, who is in political science and Islamic political thought he will be doing another class in Houston on March 9. So I need to be doing online classes also another instructor
so he has experience in
African American history, and we did a class on Malcolm X. So all of you to go to if texas.com you know about our projects, our classes. And if you can subscribe to Netflix subscription so you can go to influence.com
and subscribe to get access to the content.
So we'll have a q&a session share a line and
I'm also I just wanted to thank also
responsible for giving us the use of the massage facility.
I haven't known him
too long but
I'm very fond of my loving friends.
hopefully we'll be doing some things together all
To the muscle, mass colossal fans out here, community muscles are growing. And it's vibrant,
you know, establishing itself as a very active environment in
our community to allow it to become a center of activity.
We have questions.
the one question that has come is that what are the rules of making the fasting for women who have consecutive pregnancy and breastfeeding for several years, generally, what you will do is that you will collect all the data that you have missed out. And as time goes on, whenever you do have the chance that you will shell you will take care of your fasting one day at a time. That is, it's based on your own convenience. And there is not a set rule that you have to do it at a particular time of the year, you can do at a time that you're basically
the second question, which is, in our culture, women change their last name afterwards? Is it okay, permissible? No, it's not. In fact, let me mention this power line, it just shows you that we see things through the lens of our culture. I was once doing the lecture on women in Islam
University, and there was an honest woman that was sitting there. And she said, How come in your religion women are just property? I was like, man, can I ask a question? She said, Yes. Are you married? So I was like, Yeah, like so what's your last name? She said her last name. I was like, What's your real last name?
Was that your last name before marriage? So she said,
No, obviously, I cheated when I got married, I said in Islam is how long? It's prohibited for a woman to change her name, because she's not the property.
Why would you change your last name when you get married? Now, we don't think about that in our culture, because we you know, we don't we're not saying it is chauvinistic per se because I'm an American too. I grew up in this country I never thought anything of it. But that's the point that some sometimes we see rulings or we see things that are different in our Deen and it's not meant to disrespect the woman and things of that sort but we might see it as such because our culture we naturally have a bias we naturally have a cultural bias but Eliza just makes it fun. Whether only about him to call when you're on the other end to be called by the names of your families that is a
must. So no a woman cannot be called by the name of her husband
he talks about the middle name of babies last moment this father's name gets to the middle or last name of the baby the Father's name gets to be his middle name What is the last name
The only thing the name of the Father has to be somewhere there. So the you know the usually traditionally what it would be is that
you know you could you would be called by such and such the daughter or son of so and so and then the name of your truck, which fits perfectly with what we do here with three names right? So the name of your family would be your last name the name of the Father in Middle Name
something really cool check what even assuming he has a son named harder to follow than even what he actually made the middle name then Woody.
Woody. Yeah. So yeah, do you know try to do that Father system?
So the question I'm gonna try to read the question I'm reading
through the delivery are we supposed to make I think they may be fodder for prayer.
If there's no indication to me becoming generally as you know that the Islam is very easy of course as opposed some says that the the useless slot is something that cannot be skipped out. So the football have given permission that if it is difficult for you to get off your bed from the slot, you can perform the salon on your bed also. If is if is difficult. So do keep that in mind. If you look at overall our religion, when it comes to fasting when it comes to a lot it actually looks after the health of the person even when it comes to fasting. If there's any if your life is in jeopardy or your you know that your health can deteriorate, if you will fast the stock has given
them permission that you don't have to pass. So even if a lot when it comes to a lot the if you look at the
If you just study the tip of sollozzo, you will learn that if you cannot perform a lot of standing up, you have the permission to sit down on a chair, if you cannot do it on the chair, if you have to do it on the bed, I mean, you do on the bed if you have to do. And not only that, but there are chapters in the books of fifth in from the salon is a lot of email, which is you playing a lot with each other. So this is also about
what are they doing is to recite for young couples who are planning to have children, well, then I haven't done it. So I do know that
we can also go through some of the jobs.
But we haven't even a slider in
the software so you can make your eyes
that's the best one for sure. Um, when couples have issues having children after marriage,
up to what limits? They can consult the standing.
I'm a little confused by the question, because the first part of the question, I'm having trouble having kids. And then the second part, there's a limit. Again, the only thing that showed up for prohibits you from this permanent birth control and trying to not have any kids whatsoever. So you want to have one, two, that's fine. But the only thing is not having children whatsoever.
Oh, infertility treatment is fine, as long as the man
should have covered in the seminar.
As long as the husband's eggs are being used, or the husband's being used, as long as it's not a non Muslim, or so on and so forth, as long as that treatment fertility treatments, there's nothing wrong with it. As long as again, it's not anyone other than the husband thinks.
There's a question that has come, can we have can we use birth control, if we plan to perform hydrate once again, as mentioned in the seminar that will go on, they will not actually they will not cut out the picture completely of having children, but they will they will delay it for some reason. In the same way, if you know that you may be going for height and this could become a hindrance. Then after that, it could be usable once again, as I mentioned earlier, it has to be consensus between both husband and wife should be a mutual understanding between the spouses.
Okay, before for months, can we have an abortion, if there's different total child's
deformity or something, the child is going to seriously have a serious disorder and things of that sort, and might not even survive. So I mean, look, again, as I said, with these things you want to consult, I'm not telling you this so that when you're faced with a situation, especially with something as critical as this, that you just make up your own system. Now you go and you ask the man, you're going to ask a scholar qualified scholar to see that you've qualified to make sure that you qualify. So the general answer is yes. But as far as the severity of that, that you need to consult someone who is knowledgeable, who will in turn talk to someone who's knowledgeable in the
field of medicine. You know what the severity is?
applica for older person, does it require to save the head? No. I pick up and shaving the head are two separate things. So you don't have to shave your head when you do a peacock because this light is the animal's life. It's not the shaving so you just shaving the head advocates.
I think that's
if we happen to find
a baby or anything.
Okay, so again, let me go a little bit deeper into the question though.
There's a difference between what's permissible, and what is the best thing to do in Africa.
Raising handicapped children, or special education or special needs children is very praiseworthy. There's a lot of budget.
Not saying that you have to you should. But as far as permissibility is concerned, if it's severe enough to where the
child will not be able to function properly. Okay. And that's a loose term because the media doesn't specify things where they should not be specifying, which is a case by case.
There wasn't there was no abortion at the time of the conference, I saw them. So obviously this is
contemporary feminist to office. I mean, obviously, with new situations, that's why you have to use the tradition to try to come up with these answers. So the Delete is not the profit slice I'm upset about the ROI not being in Yeah. So therefore, the scholars in general, they used to treat the for the boys in a different way than it would be treated when they're
not inside. So that's what it is, let's just contemporary, what the football is. What I what I particularly i would i would recommend to read some of the articles I mentioned to Fatima Hodges my teacher, Mashallah is very rarely do you find someone who's qualified and skilled and qualified in Islamic law. He's a pediatrician, very skilled doctor was one of Mayo Clinic's doctors.
And he's also a PhD in showdown he's qualified fluffy and multi. So he's written a lot on these topics. And his PhD actually was on, you know, medicine, medical ethics and stuff.
So you can just search how much he actually he actually has a website, Dr. Hudson hats.com, where he writes a lot of articles and things of that sort. has an H [email protected]
We have a brother to search for brother sister, but sister, yes.
there any association?
Where did they come up with the names of his daughters? That's a good question.
I don't know. They're all before ya.
But I don't really have any idea. But
it's a good question, because I've researched
the strategy of the question.
So all the blue on the blue line to ward off
blocks. Not only is that a bit odd, but it's underlining
Okay, because consulting a magician horoscope and those types of things, these are how this can actually lead to your syllabi, invalid and things of that sort of devoid, so
no, there's no proof for putting eyes of a child. You don't put any eyes a teacher could go on and read kids with putting in is not going to do anything.
Right. Reading and writing. Okay, but putting like chains and those types of things.
There's places for them. nylon, if you want them to look cute. That's fine.
I mean, I think
I was asking the question. I mean, I'm quite aware of the culture, but generally where we come from, and so the best thing is that as the chef mentioned, reading
this is what he did is the best form of the best route to go with.
selling breast milk now Tango what nurses fine. So on the the issue here, the issue of contention is you have to know where the note is coming from. You have to be very clear and aware and still establish. So for example, the scholar said, the five occasions that make a person even if they're not sucking directly from the rest of theirs, they're taking note
of helps us to establish the relationship.
So what nurses it's not about writers as much as it's about
that there is no outlet there's there's so much
He's become a total mom to her. And she doesn't wear he doesn't have to wear hijab in front of him for all practical purposes, she's like 100
when he saw this former, what nurses he treated them, like his mother.
And we treated them with with the best honor and things of that sort. So you can derive from that obviously, they have you owe the rights upon you, but they have the rights that your actual mother would have on you.
But you want to add them to them. I mean, even one time there is mentioned that
idea when she came
and he saw her coming. He He told us a hammer that moment he he laid down a sheet, and he actually gave reference to high masabi as his own mother also. So because what they go through and take care of a child.
Yes. And also my
Okay, so reading the rokeya on your baby, right? You can read Look, you're on your baby. This is the same question.
Reading Rukia on the baby, he would simply pass her hand over the baby as a morning.
Rub your hand and arm on the chest.
Rub your hand over the baby compassionately. Like
you're trying to get a demon out.
We should take a breather now.
I honestly, I don't know. That's something I have to ask a doctor. Right? Exactly.
Yeah, once once we can determine what exactly it is, then we can put a link to that. But that's I understand what you're saying does happen.
What are the implications from other customers? I read about it?
What does genetic testing?
I mean, there's any type of screening or testing that just shows the disorders things I mean, any type of testing,
anything that's going to harm the baby's mind.
I think we'll do two more questions.
No, it's good.
liars. It's a pseudonym that's being neglected. In our community, it really is changing the name of the child
robbing a child with their identity. adoption is good. You know, that's what the prophets are referred to as the one who sponsors raises an orphan is like this with me in paradise. So I I'm a big proponent of it. And I think as a community, we need to start exploring avenues, especially on the refugees.
So what is the solution that if you get a child that's under two years old?
Yes, breastfeeding the child would make. So let's say it's a girl.
You breastfeed the girl that's under two years old five times. Not only see your daughter, your husband can see her without he's out even as an adult, she becomes his daughter and your sons would be her brothers. Okay. Likewise, assign a few tickets, if you are not the boy in your recipe, and even if a woman is not naturally producing, so there is a man have said that even if she takes on
to induce Breslin just to fulfill that purpose, that's fine. It's an honorable cost. So it should be a good account, it can be done after two years.
We'll just take one more.
And I think the shift can shed some light on this also, this question actually is actually in reference to something that has been a wave have something I mean, it's an issue where they're not agreeing upon. But the question is that, if the wife is mentally physically ready for their husband is not rate does not want a child, because he thinks this is sometimes typical. Because his thinking he thinks that his wife is irresponsible, and not good enough to be a mother. First of all, that's very wrong to think like that, that just shows that you don't have a lot of
I'll skip that right now. Actually.
I mean, it, I don't want to actually because I just I didn't read the bottom part. But I'll respond to that separately. But when it comes to this kind of marriage, there should be a mutual understanding between the husband and wife. And they should try to work things out. Remember always that, in a marriage. This is something I've talked about it was also a marriage is not a one way street is a two way street, there has to be, there should be there should be mutual understanding, and all our members that would do with this, what creates a healthy family. A lot of times, unfortunately, from the cultures that we come from, the mentality is that the man says, and the wife
she has to do with regardless whether she likes it or not, it's a one way street. And that's not what we see. And what we learned from the from the from the officer says, He always saw that the Prophet It is something you always took advice from his wives, he always, you know, got engaged with his wives. And you know, there was a mutual understanding of so many things, when the power center was in dire need, and the people who would come to give him advice, or his wives, I mean, you look at the story of davia, when he did not know what to do, it was the wife of the salon, that who came and gave advice, and that advice actually helped out very much for the problem. So that's why in all
family matters. There should be some there should be mutual understanding.
So having said that, if there's any more questions that you can ask, by the way, there are like for example, the one question that brother did ask about the
shower. Be looking more into that. There was another question that came up earlier in the after the first session, which is a very good question
that was asked in regards to the the baby and when this rule for the soul comes in. And so we'll look into that more, but there's another question that you have them please do email them, Michelle. I
just happen to love it for everyone to come
in the future,
the name of the
person, especially if it's enough,
but even if
you just need to know where it is.