Channel: Nouman Ali Khan
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Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan delves into the magnitude of different relationships in our daily lives in the light of Islam.
When we have a relationship with Allah, we need to understand that our life doesn’t become any easier or struggle free and merry. That is a totally different dimension. Wen we believe in Allah, we get the strength to face any problem or adversity and ride through the storm unscathed.
Fear and sadness are the heaviest burdens we encounter in our life. Fear is about the future and sadness is about the past. Feeling sad is not an indication of one’s faith in Allah.
An extreme case of overwhelming fear and sadness depicted in the history of Islam is that of the mother of Musa AS. this story is described at length for us to fully fathom the emotions of fear and sadness and what is the stance of a believer in the wake of this extreme adversity.
Episode Transcript ©
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all rubbish it suddenly were suddenly every little rock that Amelie Sania Coco de la masa bitter angle motiva La ilaha illa Allah, Allah homage and Amina Latina, Amina Amina Saudi heart, whatever. So be happy, whatever so many urban I mean
today's goodbyes about a very difficult subject to explain. It's about a concept that is at the heart of our relationship with Allah azza wa jal. Every one of us is a believer in Allah. And yet that faith of ours is Allah in Allah is tested. It's not just about believing in the concept of one God, or the concept of a God that deserves worship, but actually we have a deep intimate relationship and a connection with Allah azza wa jal, Illa, Hill methylone Allah but the idea of a serious relationship First, let me just say a few things about that.
There are people that you know, in life that you have a connection with, some of you are maybe alienated or separated from a close friend, or maybe a family member, many of us travel and move to different parts of the world. So you're not as connected to your uncle or your grandfather, or whoever else, you know, they exist, you have a relationship with them, you may even share a last name with them. But that does not mean you're intimately connected to them. You may not even have kept up with their life for the last 1015 years, you know, or 20 years and you don't know their kids names, you don't know what their life struggles are, like none of it, even though you're related.
It's a very distant relationship. Once in a while, you go back and you catch up and all of that, but then other than that, you're not really connected. And then compare that to some other relationships you have, that are daily, that you interact with daily that you talk to on a daily basis, right. So in life, there are relationships that exists, but they they're connected by a thread, they're not very strong. And then there are relationships that are pulling at us every single day, they impact us, they affect the way we think the effect our emotions on a on a daily basis. Those are very strong and intimate relationships. It becomes like that when it comes to our relationship with
Allah azza wa jal is all of us believe in Him, all of us have a relationship with him. But for some of us, it becomes just a concept. He's there, he's in the background, I know he's there. Even when we're praying, we're not really that connected to him. And we even if we are connected, we don't really understand what that connection what that relationship really means. And what it's supposed to be is a very close deep intimate friendship, and a close deep intimate you know, relationship where all of our daily conversations there's no conversation we have with anyone else that's missed a part of it is actually a conversation with a lot too. That's supposed to be a conversation with a
low. So, the you know, one of the the fundamental benefits of the five prayers is actually and this is why the Fatiha is called the prayer itself. The Fatiha itself can be called a prayer is because the Fatiha part of it Allah speaks and part of it we speak, meaning we have a conversation with Allah. We're actually directly communicating with Allah. When Allah says of hamdulillahi, Rabbil alameen Rahmani Raheem, Maliki Medina, he's speaking but when we say he cannot Buddha he can to stay in and so on. We're speaking. So it's actually when to when both parties are speaking, there's a conversation happening. And that's supposed to be when you have a close connection with someone, you
talk to them every day, you talk to them multiple times a day. That's actually what the prayer is supposed to be. And that's literally where the word salad comes from from Silla connection. So with that in mind, I want to share one dimension of that connection you and I are supposed to have with Allah, and that how that's supposed to help. Allah created human beings in difficulty. And he created human beings in heavy burden located in Santa Fe, but we certainly created the human being buried under heavy loads, exhaustive labor, emotional, you're struggling physically or tax, you're struggling, health wise, you may be struggling financially, you may be struggling because of people
you may be struggling this life, Allah designed it to be difficult. Sometimes you look at other people, and you say they have it so much easier than I do. But you don't know what other difficulties Allah gave them that are invisible from you. Everyone has difficulties. Everyone has challenges. You will think for example, that the pharaoh Pharaoh and had Kingdom Empire, he had the world's largest army at the time, he had everything you could want all the wealth, you could want all the power, you could want all the status you could want. He has everything and how come he has everything and the the believers have nothing and yet Allah describes about him that he lived in a
state of fear. You know, when we do our hamana, Judah mama can ruin can ruin. They used to live in a state of fear. He used to get nightmares at night. He couldn't find peace. Sometimes people have material things but they don't have peace. Sometimes people have physical health, but they don't have mental health. You know, they don't have emotional health. So all human beings were put in a state of struggle and that's believers and unbelievers. So the first you know, thing that I want to get across to all of you and remind myself of it.
Because we are believers, that does not mean our problems disappear.
It's not like because I'm a believer, I'm not going to be sad. Or because I'm a believer, I'm not going to experience anxiety, or I'm not going to have family problems, or I'm not going to have financial problems or health problems or whatever else, belief or faith in Allah, our relationship with Allah is not there to solve our problems. It's not there to get rid of the people in our life that are causing us trouble. That's not the purpose of our faith. If that was the case, then the Prophet alayhi wa Salatu was Salam who had the most close connection with Allah would have had the easiest life. They would deserve the because they would make all their problems would disappear. And
if you study the prophets, the closest people to Allah, Allah hemos, Salatu, salam, they have the hardest life, they have the toughest life and sometimes the toughest life comes to them. Not even from some faraway enemies, it comes to them from their own families. So in other words, it comes to them from people, they can't even escape. They're with them every day. They're with them their whole lives, and they can't escape those problems. So the idea that human beings are created, and were placed in a situation where they're going to struggle, they're going to have to deal with very difficult circumstances, very difficult situations, and even people they're going to have to deal
with that is part of life. And that has nothing to do with you. If you had more eemaan, you wouldn't have these problems. It doesn't work that way. As a matter of fact, the higher your Eman is, you know, people assume the higher Eman, the problems are going to go away know, the higher your demand something else. And that's something else is what I hope to explain to you today. To put it as a, an image, Allah created us and he put us inside of a storm. Okay, like imagine a storm in the ocean, you're in the storm. And the waves are turbulent, and you've got your little boat, etc. And you're constantly worried about sinking. And you're worried about those who are sinking next to you. But
Allah azzawajal what what is the faith do it gives you the strength, and it gives you the ability to go through the storm to navigate the storm. It doesn't mean you don't get wet. It doesn't mean sometimes the boat almost doesn't tip over. But you now have the ability to go through it and survive the storm. You see, that's the purpose of our faith is not to get rid of the problem, but to actually strengthen us so we can go through the problem. The one of the most powerful examples of that, actually, before I get into that example, because really at the heart of all of this hope, but today is one phrase from one if unsuitable. silat and I'll get to that at the end. But for now, I
want to give you an example, the two of the hardest burdens that human beings live with are fear and sadness, fear and greed. Those are the two heaviest burdens that human beings live with in this life. As a matter of fact, when Allah sent Adam alayhis, salam to the earth, He told him that when he gives his guidance from Entebbe, alhuda, Fela, hopefully him
whoever follows my guidance, they're going to be able to combat fear and sadness, essentially. In other words, Alon knew that in the story of humanity from other maladies Salaam, to the last human being that's going to walk on this earth, every one of them is going to have to struggle with fear. And they're going to have to struggle with sadness. Now, what are these two things? Fear is about what's going to happen in the future. fears about am I going to lose my job? is what's going to happen to mom? What's going to happen to my family? What's good? What are they going to say? what's gonna happen tomorrow? What's gonna happen with my exam? What's going to happen with my immigration,
what's gonna happen with this, and what's going to happen with that these fears about what's going to happen in the next few hours, or in the next few days, or in the year from now or in the future. These fears are small and big, and they're all the time they're a part of us. You're you wake up afraid, you're afraid you're gonna be late to work. You know, you're afraid that you're you know, you forgot about some tasks that you have to do other Time's running out small fears, big fears. But fear is a constant part of life. It's always there. And what you're afraid of, let's say a student is afraid of failing an exam.
Up until the moments of the exam, there's fear, fear, the heart is pounding, and they take the exam, and then unfortunately, they get the result that they failed. And when they fail, there's no more fear. There is no sadness. I mean, there's fear of what your dad is going to do to you. But there's sadness, mostly. Right now. There's sadness about what happened already. So fears about the future and sadness is about the past what already took place in the past and just because it's in the past, you don't get to tell someone Well, it's in the past get over it. It's done now. You can move you should move on with your life. No, you and I are not in any position to tell anyone that they are no
longer they no longer have the right to feel sad anymore. Our messenger sallallahu wasallam continued to feel the sadness of the absence of Khadija the Allahu taala on her for years. For years. Feeling sad is not a sign that you don't have enough faith. That's a I mean, he has the great
is faith of all, and yet he carries sadness Yahuwah his Salam lost his son use of honey syrup. And he carries a great amount of sadness. So much so that he cried so much about it now, his eyes turned white, his eyes turned white out of sadness. But that's part of that doesn't mean he doesn't have faith in Allah. He doesn't actually have that, as a matter of fact, he would only cry of his fear and cry of his grief and the sadness to Allah and Nolasco bethey workers need Allah, I've given him about to you about that before. But today, I want to talk to you about an extreme case of fear and sadness first. And that's the mother of Mossad Islam. I can't think of a more extreme case of a
woman who had to do something so incredibly unthinkable. She knows that any minute from now, soldiers are going to break her door, and they're going to kill her baby in front of her own eyes. For a mother to imagine the murder of her own newborn baby, unthinkable. And the only idea she had that a lot put in her is you need to put your child in a basket and put that basket, okay, you feel young, throw it into the river, it's not even nicely, gently put it into the river, in car is to throw. Now when you throw something in a river, the river is moving water. When you throw something in or in a river, it can flip. It's also the case that a basket may not necessarily float, it may
get water inside, it may hit a rock, there are animals inside the water. There are all kinds of things. As a matter of fact, I often when I used to teach the story A long time ago, I used to give the example when you see a child go even two feet near a swimming pool.
Not even the deep end, the shallow and a mother will go crazy. She'll drop everything and push people out of the way and grab her baby.
There are women that give their their their babies a bath, you know, in the tub, and they put the water this little and the baby's like come on. No, no, no, too dangerous. This matters to you'll drown. I can't even fit my head. No, no, no, not gonna let you there's a fear. And this mother has to take her newborn. He can't even crawl yet. He can't even do that yet. And she has to throw this thing into the water. Can you imagine the kind of fear this woman has in her heart when she does that. And when she does that, she can't even look at it and can't even cry and scream my baby my baby. She can't do that. Because if she does that the soldiers will no one survived. And they'll go
after him and kill him. So she has to not even be even if she looks she has to look from the side. And then this water is not standing still it's moving. So this basket is slipping away from her sight. To the point where she doesn't even know what happened to it. She has no idea what's happened to it. And now she's living with this incredible overwhelming sadness. What have I just done? What's gonna happen to my baby? You know? And in those moments, Allah azza wa jal told her latter half he will address me.
Don't be afraid, don't feel sadness. And even though she still felt afraid, and she still felt sadness, what we're learning in these eye art is a level of help you overcome, not being drowned by fear, and not being drowned by sadness. He can let you navigate those two feelings. Those two feelings are very powerful, they're enough to drive someone mad. They're enough to drive someone to the point where they don't want to live anymore. It can be that powerful. And yet Allah can give you the strength to overcome what you and I don't have the strength to overcome. This mother, like no other mother could stand doing that, and and survive. So unless as well as behalf we are the only
move that mozaffarian mooses mother's heart was you can think of the imagery as it was bleeding out. It was emptying out. It's like her heart was exploding. In God that led to Divi she was on the verge of just lead screaming out. That's my baby. I want my baby back. She was on the very verge of it. She couldn't hold it in. Lola Ravana Allah had we not tied her heart up, like literally, something's about to shatter and leak. And Allah says he, like a rope, tied it up and held it in place. What are we learning, we're actually learning that you and I are not capable of controlling our emotions, until Allah gives us the strength to do so.
The situation didn't change. The baby didn't start flying instead of floating in the water. The reality didn't change, but our heart changed. Her heart was strengthened by divine intervention from Allah Himself. Lola roboton, Allah calvia and she's not a prophet. What we're learning in these ions is that Allah will give you and me a strength to our hearts.
That will be we'll be able to overcome the most powerful fear and the most powerful sadness, the deepest, deepest kind of sadness, he'll make a strong enough, not that those things will go away, but you will be strong enough to go through it. You won't collapse, your heart won't fall apart. And he says all of this liter Guna mineral meaning so she may be from those who truly believe she could truly hold on to faith. She won't she won't ever accept that my baby drowned. She won't accept that she'll hold on tariffs, you'll hold on to hope, as a matter of fact, in this ayah for her to be a believer actually is the same as for her to be hopeful. One of our connections with Allah, that bond
with Allah, we pray to Allah, we put our hope in Allah. What Allah gives us from him, is that glue that holds our heart together and keeps it from being shattered. He gives us that strength. This is actually what I wanted to talk to you about from the I have sort of sort of say that in a Latina carlu or a boon Allah, no doubt about it. Those who declared our master is Allah seems like a pretty simple statement. Our Master is Allah. It's not a simple statement. You're not just seeing our Creator is Allah, or the one we worship is Allah. Calling him your rub. Our rub is Allah. Rob is a moaner him, Rob is someone who does favors for you, you don't deserve and keeps giving you what you
don't deserve. That's the first meaning of Rob. So Allah is one for us, who will give me more than I deserve. And he will keep giving me more than I deserve. And he will keep making him also means the one who gives an arm, meaning the one who makes things easy. He's the one who's going to keep making things easy. For me, that's who he is, to me, I've declared that when I called him Rob aluminum, well, more of the, he's the one who is going to make sure that I continue to grow, that I continue to progress, that I'm not going to stay in place, if I'm in a problem, he's going to allow me to grow out of that problem. If I'm in a state of weakness, he will give me the strength like a plant
grows in terms of like a little blade turns into a tree, he'll give me the strength to become to navigate. And to be able to overcome the weakness that I have. This is Robbie, well, I am the one who's gonna make sure I don't fall apart. Just because you're ensuring something is growing, doesn't mean you're not taking care of the problem, you know, you can build a building, and you're building more and more floors, but the foundation's falling apart, the whole thing is going to collapse. A level hold me in place can't take care of me and not let me collapse. He's my rub. When time was said and he is in charge, he's in charge of what I do. He's taken total authority over me. I'm not
in charge anymore. You know, again, maybe imagery will help you understand this, if you are bad at swimming, you find yourself in the middle of the ocean, and you're splashing and doing whatever you can. And you're it's nothing's helping water keeps going up your nose, and your mouth and nothing seems to be helping and you're getting exhausted. And until you realize there's someone holding you from underneath, you just need to relax, and just let go. And he's just keeping you floating. He's not going to let you drown. When you let go, that's actually it'll brunella our master is Allah, whatever struggles storm I'm going through, he's not gonna let me drown. He's holding me in place.
Those who openly declare that they acknowledge that they are not in control of their situation. They acknowledge that they cannot control other people's opinions. They acknowledge they cannot control what any of the creation of Allah does. When anybody else and you know, some people, some of you spend your days and nights thinking about how this person is going to harm me. What are they going to say? What are they going to do? What are they going to think this is what's going on in your head all the time, you're preoccupied with it. And when you accept Robin, Allah, you let that go. Because the one who's protecting you, and the one who's keeping you in place, and no one's gonna navigate
you through the storm, you've declared, you've handed it over to him. You've let go, what I'm gonna law. And that declaration is so powerful. It's a kind of freedom. There are so many of us who make so many decisions in our life. As a matter of fact, so many of our emotions, in our life are controlled by other people. They're controlled by other people how sad you are, how angry you are, how hurt you are, we're letting other people control how we feel. And when you really, truly declare my master is Allah, the power creation has over you disappears. Like they're just creations, they have no power when the law doesn't give them that power. And when he strengthens your heart, then
whatever they have to see and do bounces right off of you. And it doesn't hurt you anymore. That again, reality doesn't change, you change, you change. I'll give you another quick example of that. You know, there was a terrible slander that the author was sharing with you previously. I'll come back to that series. Soon. The author was sharing with you about the slander against Chateau de la Horan.
I have came of the Quran, I asked him the Quran and she felt relieved. She felt relieved. But you know what? The hypocrites are still hypocrites. The filthy mouth was still a filthy mouth. People were still saying what they were saying, that didn't change for the believers, they recognized it and they took me to a bar and they changed. But for people who had dirt in their hearts, they didn't change. So the hurtful words and the hurtful slander and the hurtful accusations continued. As a matter of fact, they continue until this day, they continue until today, and yet she's relieved. Reality didn't change. A lot didn't send those out. So silence everybody, because that's not gonna
happen. That won't, Allah doesn't do things that way. They let them dig their grave. That's fine. A lug Central's IOD. So those who believe can have strength, their heart could be tied, their heart could find peace, that's actually in the Latino corner of Manila. Then he says for master combo. They didn't just say our master is Allah, then they lived a life of trying to stand up straight.
They lived a life of holding on top when Allah not letting anybody else pull them down. Not letting anybody else get control, not letting letting anybody else become their owner, not emotionally, not physically, not financially, not in terms of their temptations. They didn't they recognize a less supreme authority and control and care over them. And they they reminded themselves of that over and over again, you know, it's the common Arabic doesn't just mean to be straight. They use it for poetry is the common shear. And it doesn't.
Like when, when the when the poet used to write a poem, it didn't totally rhyme. So he would make adjustments to fix it, until it's finally even all the rhymes or even and all the lines or even all the syllables line up. That's the idea of is the comma. In other words, you don't just say my master is a lie. Now you're perfect. No, you keep struggling to fix yourself, you find yourself leaning this way, a little too much fear in your life and you pull yourself together. And you don't let that fear overwhelm you. You find too much sadness in your life and you remind yourself of Allah and you hold on to Allah again and he pulls you back together again, the idea of holding on to Allah to
overcome and to be able to navigate your grief and your sadness. Again, I remind you, as I said, in the beginning, our faith in Allah will not get rid of our grief. And our faith in Allah will not get rid of our sadness and will not get rid of our fear. But it will make us strong enough to overcome them. Strong enough to go through them without breaking us. It is in those moments of fear and of sadness, and of you know of grief. That is when Chetan comes and wants you to let go of Allah.
Because shaytan feeds you something else. shaitaan says, If Allah is so great, why are you upset? If Allah so awesome? Why did you have to go through all this sadness? Allah could have just gotten rid of your sadness, he could have created a situation where you had to experience no sadness. Why did you have to go through it? Why do you have to have these fears? Why do you deserve this anxiety? Let go of Allah, he's not doing anything for you. That's Chapin's most powerful opportunity in those moments in those moments. And yet Allah here says, if you can help not only declare that your master is Allah, but you can hold on to that deep inside you not from someone else for yourself, if you can
do that, then what does he say? That is genuinely human melodica and latter half, why not?
If people can live a life of doing that, and holding on to a love that way, then as they're dying, as they're leaving this world, people around them are crying. They can't even speak anymore. They're on their deathbed. And yet, they can see what their relatives can't see. They can see angels come down. And angels are having a conversation with a person on their deathbed. And they're telling him or her. You don't have to fear anymore. There's no more fear at all. And there's no more sadness at all. Congratulations, you're going to have it? Well, I'm gonna let you continue to handle and then they add something this is, you know, this is at the end of their life. They're about to they're not
even in the grave yet. They're not even in the grave yet. And yet, they're being told you're going to heaven by angels. Everybody else is crying. They're the ones smiling inside. They're the only everybody thinks so this is so sad. This is such a tragedy, and this is the greatest moment of their life. This is the greatest moment of that because they live that they navigated that storm. When they're in that moment. What are the angels tell them? They tell them that no Alia welcome Phil hayati, Daniela.
We were your guardian angels. We were protecting you in this life and we will also in the next life unless sent us a special security team just for you. When you were being overwhelmed and you held on to a lot we became your security around your heart. When you were overwhelmed with grief and sadness and fear. We were the ones that allow us to send for you. We were the ones that guarded you. We were the ones that shielded you from the from the whispers of the death.
We were there all along. They're introducing themselves to you. You're meeting them for the first time they've known you your whole life. Magnolia. Welcome, Phil. Hey, it Daniela Yara That's the promise of Allah to those who hold on to him, to those who can who can hold on to him. Now, the last thing I want to share with you is at the moment of death, we are alone.
When it when you live a life, and you're about to depart from this life, you don't take anybody with you. You're alone, your questioning is alone. But remarkably, in this ayah, everything is in the plural corlew Rob una la cama de tener, la him and la foux. Everything is for, don't be afraid all of you. They said, Our Master is Allah, why is the plural being used if one person's at their deathbed, the idea of a plural here is you may have felt that you're the only one going through this. But centuries before you our mother went through this when she was putting a baby in the water. And centuries before house before that a man went through this when his father kicked him out
of the house. And centuries before that. And centuries before that there are believers and prophets, good people all across history and all across the world that you've never met, that you've never known, who've gone through exactly the same struggles you're going through in their own way. And they held on to a lot like you held on to Allah. And you're actually connected to them in this ayah you're not alone. They may have died 1000s of years ago, but you have a deep and intimate connection with them. Just like you have a connection with a larger religion. With a law you're connected by your dogs. And with them, you're connected because of the same struggle that you're going through.
You know, this is why we make the dog heck now beside the hint, join us among the righteous join us among the good people where you're not alone. You're part of a legacy. And our people before you that have already left that are praying for you actually will establish your own ability now lamballe hakuba him and him they're congratulating each other of those who haven't yet joined them, and hopefully him well Oh, yes, no, they're not gonna have fear and grief either. Larissa will help us navigate our fears and navigate our grief and not be overrun by them. Eliza will keep us from the you know from the emotional torture and the emotional manipulation of others. May Allah azzawajal
give us a life of freedom from control of his creation, and really truly allow us to be, you know, his pure slaves of his in every sense of the word barakallahu li walakum feel carotid Hakeem when I finally was iacobelli it was the current Hakeem