Nadim Bashir – Khatira – Toxic Friendship

			shorter a MacArthur has me revolving around a certain issue that goes along. That goes around in
many, many times in our lives. So how long I mean, the times when I counsel people when I sit down
with people and just talk to them and their problems, one thing that I've seen very consistently is
that a common complaint has been that I want to do things in my life. I want to move forward in
life. But there are people in my life who are holding me back. And there are people in my life who
don't want to hide for me, they show face, they show me a face that they care for me. But behind the
scenes, I know that they don't care for me. There's hypocrisy in their life. And they're the ones
		

			who are holding me back. And they usually told me that sometimes it's family, sometimes it's
friends, sometimes it's community members, sometimes there's relatives, and the list just keeps on
going on today inshallah want to talk about this matter. First of all, is that we learned that this
is not an issue that we see today. This is something that has been going on for a very long time. So
that for con Allah subhanho wa Taala talks about companionship, Allah says that there will be a
person on the day of judgment where Yo Ma Guevara Remo, Allah, your day a was talking about that.
Remember, the day will come where the volume will be chewing on his hand. Now, first of all, I want
		

			you to think about this. If you see any person sitting around and they're actually chewing on their
hand, you can tell right away that there is something of great undermined, there is something
they're worried about. Allah is saying that on the Day of Judgment, you'll see the volume, he'll be
chewing on his hand on his hand, your other volume, Allah your day, you're cool and he will say,
Yeah, Anita, Anita huduma, Rasulullah, Sabina, that Yahweh and then he says, Yeah, way later, later,
honey LaMotta his full and Halina. He says that I wish I were taking such and such person as friend,
and I will not taking such and such person as my friend, Luca Avallone. This person, he deceived me,
		

			he misguided me by the if journey. But after the vicar and after the hidayah of Allah came to me,
this person misguided me now, there's a story behind this, that there was a one of the leaders of
the Quraysh it was his common practice that whenever he would come back from a journey, he would
invite everyone to his home. He was a very well off leader of the place he was a Muslim. So he
invited us who also allow your salon Rasulillah Salam was considered as a leader of the community.
So he invited him Rasulullah sallallahu sallam said to him, that I will take your food. Now one
thing that you have to always remember when it comes to the Arabs, they're very big on hospitality
		

			and they get very offended. It's something that within the the Arab world is is part of the nature
of the Arabs, that if you deny their hospitality, they can become very offensive. So what happened
was that this The problem is that I was telling him, I deny your hospitality, I will not take your
food. The only condition I will take your food is you recite La ilaha illAllah. So this person he
says, Well, you know, I, I have to i The person has to have food for me. So he says okay, I should
have Allah and Allah why should I want him from the Rasul Allah, he gave in he took his Shahada. The
next day, he met what may have been halal or may have been have said that I heard you became a
		

			Muslim. I found out that you became Muslim. He says, I became a Muslim. The Prophet saw something he
asked me to so I converted to Islam. He says that are you coming under pressure, he goes, go back
and denounce your assumption, Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and so this person, this
leader of the Polish, he went back to Rasulullah sallallahu sallam, he denounced his arrange and
based on this, these ayat were revealed now, this these ayat are generally often explained when
we're talking about noble companionship. But here I want you to think about this. Let's try to
understand the story here. You have people like Omega Ben Harloff, you have people like Abu Jehan
		

			deep down in their heart, deep deep down in their heart. They knew that there is some legitimacy
with Islam. Ebola Abuja, Hall was heard saying that I would convert to Islam, but my tribe and the
tribal Ross was salam. They go head to head, we always are competing with each other if I were to
become a Muslim, and I come under Rasulullah sallallahu wasallam. And I accept or sorcerer as my
prophet is as if my tribe is accepting defeat to the tribe of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam, and because of this, I cannot do this. Because when you see the stories of Israel in Mirage,
when you see the stories of us herbal cough, and so forth, when there's when the Quraysh went to
		

			Medina and the Jewish community there is said, go back and ask your Prophet about these three
questions. Who else have Volkov? Who was burning? What is the rule and Rasulullah. Sasson is able to
give all these answers and so forth. When Rasul Allah, someone's bringing in the Quran and they
hearing the Quran. They're standing outside the house of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and
night hiding from each other. Listen to the Quran in taking you know, just enjoying the citation the
Quran, deep down inside they knew that there is some legitimacy to the to Islam, but what they did
was that in this case, they are the one
		

			ones who are not moving forward, but they will not let anyone else go forward either. Even if there
was a person who had some goodness in their heart, like this other leader have the courage, even if
there was someone who said that you know what, let me give you some a shot. Let me just even listen
about Islam. These were the people who were holding them back. And likewise, as I said earlier,
there's always going to be people in our life who are going to always hold us back. That is why it
is absolutely important. And we see from us allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, The Who are the
people that he surrounded himself with. It was those people who helped him in this in regards to
		

			this dunya and regards to the archetype, it was people like the Sahaba of the Allahu Anhu that
helped him in his cause. It was people who did not even believe in Allah who helped in the cause of
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam like, like his uncle Abu Talib. So the point I'm trying to
make is that a lot of times we surround ourselves with people who hold our who hold us back in
regards to our dunya. And regards to our spirituality in regards to any other thing in life, they
will hold us back. And what we have a problem with is that we cannot let go, we usually have to
sever and we have to move forward. That's the only way you'll be able to move forward and you're
		

			going to find some happiness in your heart. I'm going to finish on this Inshallah, let me give you
an example of a tree. See in the Quran, often Allah gives the example of a tree. That's why I'm
gonna give you the example of a tree. You don't want to people come for landscaping, and they come
and they want to plant a tree. Usually that tree is in a flower pot. You've seen that right? Yes or
no? When they're about to plant a tree, that tree isn't a flower pot, right? Yes or No, not that
seed of a tree. Think about it, you put it into the flower pot and it begins to grow. But can that
seed that seed of a tree can reach its fullest potential. If it's going to remain its entire life in
		

			that flowerpot can reach its potential, it cannot reach its potential. Only when you take that seed
out along with this routes, and you take this tree out, which is a premature tree, you take that
out, and you put it into a ground a full ground, and then the roots can get deeper and that tree
tree becomes stronger. Likewise, if that sea were to remain in that flowerpot, it can never reach
its fullest potential. Why? Because of its environment. Likewise, many times if we want to reach our
fullest spiritual potential, our intellectual potential, our emotional potential, and any other
potential that we want to achieve in our life, many times we have to change our environment, just
		

			like that seed has to change his environment in order to become a full tree and reach his fullest
potential. You cannot live in that same environment sometimes have the same friends that are holding
you back the same family members that are holding you back. And then you want to reach your
potential, sometimes it will not happen. I'm not saying go and cut off relationships. No, our dean
has always strictly against that either. But at the same time, you don't have to be used by other
people. At the same time, you don't have to always be around them. People who make you feel
inferior. Listen to me very carefully. If someone makes you feel inferior, there's no need to be
		

			around them. If someone makes you feel worthless, you don't have to be around them. I don't care who
it is, but you don't have to be around them. And if you have to be around those kinds of people who
will hurt you in the heart, who are going to destroy you internally, and they're going to have an
effect on your mental state, your mental health state that even if you have to be around them be
around them at a bare minimum, and then you cut off. Because this is where people I see people are
so much in pain internally. Why because of their surrounding. So this is why our Dean has taught us
not only is it about noble companionship, but just that we find the soil Bucha * and Omega bahala
		

			do not become Do not be around those people who are going to always hold you back. There are people
who don't want to move forward in life and they cannot bears they cannot bear to see anyone move
forward in life and become happy. So cut off from them be more happy inside and choose your friends
wisely. I asked Allah subhanho wa Taala to make us amongst those who have friends who care for us
who are not toxic in our life and who genuinely cared for us and who want the betterment of us. I
mean nobody I mean does that Kamala had a cinematic life to live with Catherine
		

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			what's going on? I don't know who
		

			was a gentleman Eileen.