The Women Around the Messenger SAW – Episode 20

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Muhammad West

Channel: Muhammad West

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Topics: Women

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Episode Transcript

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I mean, well salat wa salam O Allah Ashraf, Mohammed mala he was mine, my beloved brothers and sister Emma said Mr. Alec Morocco library cattle like Luffy thank you so much for joining us this episode 19 of our series the blizzard women around the messenger sort of like they were sending them. In our last episode, we began our discussion with regards to our mother hafsa rhodiola. And how the daughter of Satan Ahmed from the alarm, and we mentioned how she became a wife of the prophet SAW lamb following the death of a first husband, how Satan searched for a house for her husband for her. And initially he was turned down by a robot and with man, and then of course, the

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professor himself proposed to have some and they were married. So she became the the wife of the professor limp along with Ayesha and soda. So hafsa is now the fourth wife of the prophets of Allah. Obviously, Khadija was the first in soda in Asia and a half Sahaja. Juana, by now we know she had passed away. And the Prophet had these three wives, we said of hofsas personality that she was very intelligent. She was extremely devout in terms of her worship, she was very much like a father or mother law and who, and she was very opinionated, and she would speak her mind. And she was not shy to voice her opinions. And there was a degree of stubbornness in her. And this at times put her into

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some problems with the prophets of Allah, which we'll get into in tonight's lecture. Some of the awkwardness between her and the Prophet Salaam because of this, and it shows us these these are human beings, but they're not angels, they are goods and Bad's to everyone's personalities, and at times, this can be a source of friction. So did it begin with us in relation we find that in in Buhari, the Sahaba, even a bustle, even a bustle of the law, and who he's the prophets also lumps, you could say he's his young cousin, and he was a young man, he was a basically a child or a teenager, in the time of Solomon, he grew up and he becomes one of the great scholars of the next

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generation. So in terms of going to be so salami was basically a boy, one of the small boys in time of the Sahaba. And when when the prophet SAW son has passed away, he now becomes a big man, he becomes mature and becomes a scholar. So even a boss says that for a whole year, I had the desire to say normally the one regarding a verse in Surah Surah, Tarim is the 66th surah of the Quran surah number 66. That remains the prohibition and in the last panel with Allah reprimands, two wives of the Prophet of Allah. So if we take them to the hareem, Allah Subhana Allah says Allah bless

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him, yeah, you and maybe limit 200 Allah Allahu la casa de Lima, God as logic well law of walking, oh prophet of Allah, why do you make her on what Allah has made halal for you, seeking the approval or the pleasure of your wives, and Allah is Forgiving and Merciful. Allah has already ordained for you the dissolution of your oaths, and Allah is your protector, and he is the knowing the wise. So we'll talk about what I was talking about here in as we go through the CDs, we'll get to this issue when this is revealed what the two what else pantalla is saying. But the next is the ayah, which we are concerned about. So Allah says, What is a sovereign, maybe you elaborate it as well, Jihad etha,

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Philomena de la la, whole

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hobby or not man,

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called a

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hobby. And remember, when the prophets of Salaam confided a secret to one of his wives statement, and the prophecy to one of his wife, I'm telling you a secret, don't tell anyone else. And then she informed the other of it. And so Allah made it known to the processor lamp that she did so and he made it known part of it and ignored apart. And when the prophet SAW Selim said to her, about this, that I know you told the secret. And she said, so who told you about this? The Prophet says to her, the one who told me is that all knowing the always meaning Allah told me of this. So then Allah says to these two wives, in the tuba, the two of you, if you repent to Allah, for your hearts have made a

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mistake. You have deviated you made a mistake. But if you cooperate, if you if you repeat a lot will forgive you. But if you cooperate one another, against him, against the Prophet, then Indeed, Allah is the Protector of the Prophet ngvd. And the righteous believers, and all the angels, moreover, are his supporters. So Allah now these are kind of strong words, these are stick to words of the Prophet of Allah saying the two of you made a mistake and you basically repent. So even abus wanted to ask, say normal, who are these two women which to Allah didn't mention the names in the Quran. So he said for one year I went to ask him, but I was shy because obviously it could be his daughter have some,

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so he says, we were on Hajj together, and I was with him and we made Hajj together. Then we returned back all the way back to Medina is I found myself sort of alone with him and say, No, I'm going to the toilet. And when he came back, even a boss says to cinnamon, Yamato lon Oh, meaning Oh, but this time

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See normally the halifa right aboubaker passed away the professor passed away. So she normally is now the Caliph. So he says, Oh, I mean Oh command of the believers, who are these two women that I was talking about in the Quran? So who say no man basically, like you can imagine the expression is facing says, Yeah, this is half son, I shall have son, I surely did something. And they conspired, or there was a secret which of course, the Lamb had said to one of them, and they shared the secret. And so Allah Himself, they put him on to them. And and then when, when even a verse if you know, yeah, I mean, I waited a whole year to ask you this, but I was too shy to do so. So say no, almost

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history. And look, don't ever feel shy when discussing matters of the dean. If you think I have knowledge, then be be open and asked me and if I know I will tell it to you. And if you and if I don't know that I basically there's nothing to tell. Now say nobody goes further. So he was even a boss just asked him who these women he answered, it's I should have saw, but now say gamma goes further and he tells us a very beautiful Hadith. Satan armor says you know what? In but I swear, but a lot will lie. In pre Islamic times in the times of je Leah, we as men paid no attention to our women. We did to them what we wanted, they were non existent. They were a commodity. We use them, we

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abused them, we even killed them. They were meaningless to us women had no say or anything. Until now. So number continues until a lot of yield versus the regarding them. And he revealed regarding them and assigned for them what he assigned for the minute you gave him rights. He gave them honor, he gave them stature. Side note here. People today accused Islam of being you know, anti women or being oppressive to women will lie you need to just look at the situation of women in the whole world, not just in the Arabian context, how women lived before Islam, what kind of

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oppression they was, how limited their rights were only in the last 100 years or so. Could women vote freely only in the last 150 years? Could in the western context? Could she owned her own property? Could she decide who to marry who to divorce, these kind of things were handled the Sharia had given 1500 years ago, at a time when many cultures were considering if a woman was even human, they were regarded as being subhuman. Islam gave women this honor. So say no, I'm really saying before Islam came, we didn't care about our women, then Allah revealed verses about them, and how we have to respect them.

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So much so so you see so much so that once I was in an argument with my wife, and during the argument, it kind of got heated. And I said to her, what have you got to do with this matter? Like I mean, who asked you your opinion? How can you back back check to me? How can you raise your voice to me? So his wife responded, now before they were very submissive, they obey their husbands? So they were they were completely under the control of their husbands. Now Islam had given them honor given them a voice. So say now mother, wife response, you don't take it. She says, are strange. This is a woman. She says, oh, Sanibel, hubbub, or even not even sure you want to argue with me. You want to

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criticize me for arguing with you for for the podium for speaking back to you. Yet your own daughter hafsa. She speaks back to the professor lamb. You say I can't speak back to you. And who are you? When your daughter is arguing with a professor lamb not only arguing, she goes to such an extent that she will argue with him that he becomes angry with her for an entire day. Or she will give him like the cold shoulder for the entire day. She won't speak to him. So who are you that's how your daughter in the expert has been the professor let me say no mercy is immediately when she said that. I put my clothes on, I went straight to have saw and I said to hafsa is this really how you carry

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on. So he also said, it's not just me. It's all of us, meaning all his wife to do that, not just me. soheila. Now, again, pause for a second year approximal solemn, he is the best of all creations. And he's the man that needs to be respected and honored the most. He comes home after Subhanallah doing the most difficult work the work of a lot dealing with so many enemies dealing with an entire nation. He comes home and like all of married couples, sometimes his wives would give him you know, give him an earful. And they would sometimes go overboard and they would have seen him. He had not one see the person come to say no more and see the Army soldier daughter out not one city complained

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to anybody about his wives. He just took it like a normal like a husband does. And if it upset him in that moment, after some time, the argument was over and hamdulillah they kissed and made up so half sigh saying, Look, it's not just me that that speaks that sometimes goes overboard. All of us do it. And the professor never mentioned anything. So so it almost says to his daughter Listen, hafsa I'm wanting you don't try to be like Ayesha, Ayesha maybe can get away with these kind of things. You're not Ayesha, so again, Omar says this, know your place and don't upset him. And if if ever something happens between the two of you don't even think I will take your side. I'm with him.

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Not with you.

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So then see not only goes to another wife, which we'll talk about soon, whom sadhana, Guardiola, Anna and who Salah was always of all the wives, the most level headed, the most mature, the most diplomatic. So you could have, she didn't get so fiery and heated. So she was always a peacemaker. So say normally goes to him Salama, and he says to her, listen, I'm Santa, is this the case? Do you women go on like this? So she basically says to Omar, look, it's so strange that you want to put your nose in everyone's business. This is a private matter between the prophets of Salaam and his wives. Why do you want to know what we talk about? And how we argue? So basically, you know, don't

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involve yourself in a matter which the profits are seldom is a private matter. So almost as you know, when she said that to me, I felt kind of calm, and I lift the meta event. Now, it's mentioned, and we'll talk about what is the secret and the reality we shouldn't be discussing the promises, I'm totally secret to one of his wives. And he said, Don't tell anybody, and this is between husband and wife, we shouldn't try and analyze what it would be, but what we do know from this end, for the sake of understanding and discussing certain matters, what we do know is that because of this, and because have sought divulge the secret, the profits are seldom actually divorced, half saw. So this

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issue we say normally we need to have sight unseen. Do you argue with him? And do you? You know, basically upset him? This happened before she divulged the secret. So almost having a look, you watch watch yourself you might fall into a mistake. And he says I warn you that if you upset him, he's not just any husband. He's sort of law. So tell me if you upset the prophet SAW Selim, you're gonna upset a lot. You're going to offend Allah And if you do that, you could be ruined. So have saw she didn't fully listen. She you know continued like this. And then the problem Salam had confided a secret to her he told her something. And when she knew when she heard about the secret, immediately

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showing to Ayesha and told her about the secret and Allah subhanho wa Taala expose them. So Allah says to them if you repent and they did repent, and they did obviously and reform a loss pans ALLAH forgive them, but because of this, the prophets are seldom actually divorced have sucked. So these are a narration which mentioned that the prophets of Salaam had divorced have saw with one paddock he had given her one talaq and obviously she was completely devastated. When Satan Ahmed came to hear about this, he could stand on his head and he said, From now on, Allah basically does not love me anymore. And my daughter Subhana Allah, she's, you know, and how could she have done this? How

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could she have done this? So, Akbar even Ahmed narrated the dimensions of divorce hafsa with one talaq and not long after that, not long after that gibreel himself from Allah comes to the Nabisco salon, and says to the professor lamb, take Huff's are back, take her back, meaning you need to take back your truck and re marry her she make her your wife, because in one relation it says that this is an honor to say no armor. armor is nice making the ayah Allah Please forgive me forgive hafsa Yeah, Allah, I want to be the family of the cross for them. So I'll accept that he's in another narration. And this narration is stronger in the moussaka been Hakeem gibreel says, that Allah tells

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you to take back hutzpah because she's a woman that is often fasting and worshiping praying and fasting, making Salah at night and fasting in the day. She's a pious woman. Yes, there are certain things in her character which upsets you. And yes, she did go over that over the line. But you take her back, so the professor lamb to come back. And when, you know when the professor to come back on, well, once again comes to his daughter and says hafsa last straw last chance. If you do anything else that that gets you out of line, then remember, not only will you divorce, you can even speak to you I'm done with you. If you do anything that gets you out of line, behind the law say normally was

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very, very strict with her. But the purpose of Salah was amazing, as we said that he had not ever come to see not to complain about half saw, and he had never even criticized any of them publicly. The mini Hadith we looked at all the Hadith where the Prophet plays his wives publicly, and showed affection to them publicly, but not once. Do we see a reprimand from him to his wife because he never did this publicly was just between the two of them. And the promises of them even when hafsa had broken her promise. He didn't divorce her because of that he divorced her because a lie now reveals our yet because a law needs now a lot gets involved in his marriage. And now Allah says to

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that Ibiza Salaam Why did you do this? And you you have now you have to repent to the wiser problem. This issue now of course now becomes a very public matter. It's in the Quran to power until the day of karma, it's those verses are they so because of that, the prophet of Allah, of course, became very upset, and he was tough. So now

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Let's talk about a little bit of an awkward question about divorce. Divorce is never a nice thing. And it's something which we always disparage. But one thing we learned from the story of half saw that even the very, very best of people have served the law and one of the best of women of the women of gentlemen, the fact that gibreel comes from a lot to say, this is your wife in the dunya. And this is your wife in the agenda, meaning she's of the very best of women, if she has a mistakes, you have the best husband, the best wife, and they have the problems and even the best of people will go through a bad patch, they will make mistakes. And even in such cases, you might even find a

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divorce, and Subhanallah it shows that your spouse no matter how good they are, these are gonna be some character flaws in that. And sometimes we have to take the person as a package, we take this person's a package, we weigh all the good against all the bad. So yeah, gibreel is saying that Allah is telling you all Mohammed Al salam, that Yes, she's got these two, three character flows. But look at the other benefits in terms of her piety, in terms of her devotion to Allah, she's a righteous woman, is these mistakes we overlook, and we pour them. So this is a message for all of us as husbands and wives, that our partners will never ever be perfect, they will be things that we

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genuinely hate. And in the Quran, Allah says that if you hate something in your partner, then remember something, a lot of good might come from this person that's from this person that you hate so much, or certain parts of your partner that you hate so much, they may be lots of good things that we take for granted. So don't be a rash. And Don't be hasty in breaking off because you weigh the pros and the cons. And many times you find that the good outweighs the bad. Now let's talk a little bit more of a fixed side of divorce. As I said, part of this, this series is to dispel certain misconceptions. So one of the misconceptions is that how unfair is your Sharia? how unfair

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is your religion, that a man can divorce a woman like that he can just basically say, I divorce you and harass the marriage over and he doesn't the reason he doesn't need witnesses, he doesn't need permission, he can just do it on any whim or fancy and he counts. Even he makes a joke. And he says, You know what, today I divorce you Ayesha, and he laughs It counts as a divorce. So how unfair is that? And for a woman, you need to go and apply to the MTC and you need to struggle and struggle. And you know, how is this fee so to understand divorce in Islam, there are three ways in which a marriage can be ended three ways. The first way is called a talaq, which is in the hands of the

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husband. So, we have duck, then we have what we call a facade or facade, that is what the announcement. So, this is way the authority the judge with orlimar, they will announce a marriage they will separate between husband and wife. And then we have an interesting form of divorce called a hula, which is initiated from the wife, the wife actually purchased the self ultimate marriage to have talaq which comes from the husband, you have the first or in an ailment which comes from the authority or the allameh. An external person separates the two of him. Then you have from the wife something called a hula, hula, which she purchased herself out of a marriage, and inshallah we will

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talk more about this in next week. But on the issue of talaq talaq is the most common one that we see, this is a way the husband can divorce the wife by giving her a statement, or an indication of divorce. What do I mean? So how does one divorce? How do you collect somebody, the husband basically says to the wife, I divorce you, I no longer want to be married to you, he makes a statement, which very clearly indicates that he wants to end the marriage, he makes a statement that clearly indicates that the marriage is done. And once he sees it, he writes it down. Or he shows in some way, which clearly shows that they immediately the marriage ins is a talak. The woman now is

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divorced and the contract is is broken. This could happen as we said, if the husband does it. jokingly, if he did it unintentionally, even if he was angry, and in that moment, he said it. It counts. Why does it count Now many people will ask the husband he can just say to luck and it's over he can do what he wants. He's in charge knows behind Allah. How many of us imams we know husband comes crying crying? Yeah, mom. I said to my wife, I divorce you. And you know, I'm really good. I want to take her back. Sometimes you won't be able to take her back because it was three times he's done three strikes and you're out and he will regret it 99% variegated. What does this mean? This is

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not a privilege. Rather, it's an Amana. Allah is saying to us as mean, no matter how difficult things get, no matter how much he upsets you. No matter what she says to you. You have to keep yourself in check. If you say something, it counts even if you did it in a moment of anger.

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It counts because you as a man, you are not allowed to say certain things without consequences. Sometimes the lady is in your face and she says daddy mostly taught me Come Come, she can say a billion times it won't count. But the man must say just one time and a lot takes it takes that into account. Allah writes that down and it is counted as a divorce. So this is not really a privilege. Rather, it's an honor, it's a responsibility to show you the strength, or you know, the enormity of it. So the four sisters have sympathy for your husband's think of the times when you are just not the best person and you're in his face and you're arguing we how many times would you have said the

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worst of things. But the husband never said I thought IQ yet he had that card in his pocket. He could have taken it out at any moment. But he keeps it back and he remains and he constrains his anger and himself. He knows that certain things. I can't cross this a line I can't cross for you. Sometimes you cross those lines, but the husband does not. So this is something to be kept in mind also, and we end up with a cliffhanger. One can also transfer your color code that will talak so it is very possible for the husband to actually give the wife You can tell me it's called the wheel talaq. So she has the card she can actually divorce the husband through a sickness tala How does

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this work? What happens then? We discuss this inshallah in our next episode Zakah has so much for any questions, concerns or comments with [email protected] to be including our WhatsApp line, please send us a an email or message and you will be added inshallah. Jacqueline soleimani Kumar