Fiqh Of Love Episode #5 Why Do We Marry Part2

Salam Alaikum salam. My name is John Fontaine and welcome back to another episode of the thick of love. Today we're joined here again with Sheikh Dr. Mohamed salah. Welcome welcome set our motto here what I care to thank you for having me now. Sheikh Subhan Allah last last episode, mashallah we learned so much about some of the reasons why, you know why Muslims, both male and female? Why do we get married? I want you to discuss this a bit further. What are some of the, you know, how can, let's say marriage be an act of worship?

If you intend so, it becomes an act of worship. And this is a major difference that

differentiates Muslims and practicing Muslims, from non Muslims and from non practicing Muslims.

Take for innocence. In the sound Hadith, the Messenger of Allah peace be upon him says, We're ineffable they hadn't gone sadaqa.

You know, this is like a very polite word that the Prophet Salah Salem, have used to refer to the sexual relations. It said whenever you have sexual relations with your spouse, you will be rewarded. So the audience the Companions, they raise their eyebrows and they said, Oh prophet of Allah, I can one have sex and be rewarded. So look at the reasoning how the Prophet SAW Selim, made it clear to them, he said, What if a person happened to have sexual relations in Haram by fornication? outside marriage?

Wouldn't he deserve to be punished? They said, Of course, I said, well, so he avoided what is haram and he resorted to what is permissible, and he fulfilled and she fulfill both, they satisfy the sexual desire in a lawful way, then they deserve to be rewarded for that. So while your staff if it is, their faff is to keep your, to God, your chastity is to do it only in halal. So you have lots of temptations around you. And you avoid that and you chose willingly to satisfy your physical needs in Hala, that applies also to the woman, then the Almighty Allah will reward you for that. And this is how marriage and the very, very private relationship in marriage which has sexual relations and

intimacy can turn into to become an act of worship Subhanallah and This then leads us on to the the benefits of that which is procreation, having children of course of having a family.

Yeah, of course, you know, in one of the Hadith, particularly because, as you know that many people

you know, due to cultural reasons, they like to have boys and not gods. So the prophets, Allah Allah is

admired and praised a person who Allah will bless with girls, and he will educate them or bring them take care of him until they grew up. In one Hadith he said that if Allah bless you three goals, and he take care of them, you feed them properly, educate them, you upload them, you bring them in a good way. They will become your vein again, as hellfire. You're not going to enter a bar because of those three girls. So they say the Rasul Allah, what about two he said, and too,

and they said, have we said what about one he would have said, and one in general, the Prophet sallallahu sallam said that one of the reasons that he will be proud of his Alma, on the Day of Judgment is having a huge number of followers. A huge number of followers. It's not because of the magnitude of number, is that because of the magnitude of the believers or Omar Mahatama Radi Allahu on one said, you know, the main reason why I actually have this intimate relationship is too busy by why I actually make sure that I would have such relationship. Raja Yasukuni Allah Who minutes into shadow Hola, hola. Hola. Hola. Hola.

With that Allah will grant me

a child who had c'est la ilaha illa Allah. It was the wish of Prophet Suleiman peace be upon him when he intended to have, you know, he was married like to 100 woman, and he was hoping that you would have a child for each one of them, who would be a believer and you will support him in, you know, in fighting the non believers and so on. So, the procreation and having a godly offspring is, of course, one of the greatest,

you know, goals of getting married. And as I said, they make dua for you, the children they can, you know, benefit you even when you're dead and gone as well. Or better have learned I mean, as wodgina was a regional karate iron invasion. Al Motta, Karina Imam, I look at the order, without having goodly spouses, there is no way you can have godly offspring. Without having the right spouse would give you comfort, serenity and tranquility, you're not going to have the children who would be like comfort for your eyes. So this is the right beginning. This is the beginning. Also, this reminds me it correct me if I'm wrong, but I heard this a statement from I think it was almost a tab, where he

said that, you know, one of the duties, if you like, other responsibilities of the Father is to pick a good mother in the first place. Oh, yes. Yes, it says a very interesting study, when somebody complained to him, that my son is very ungrateful to me. It doesn't obey me. He doesn't respect me. So I want to decided to investigate the case before he punishes that boy. So the boy said, Yeah, I mean, don't we have rights upon our parents do it? Is it only one way? Only the parents should have rights on the children? Is it No, the parents have rights upon their children, and the children have rights upon their parents said educate us? What are the rights of the children upon their parents?

Who said to choose a good mother for them? Number one, to give them good names, once they're born, and to teach them the deen the Quran? Is it will my father deprive me for all my rights. And his mother was not the mother whom he would be proud of. And we spoke about that in the previous episodes. It's not only about the look, and the applies also to the girl whenever she accepts a marriage proposal. It's not because of the look alone. This is one of the factors which helps you to make the final decision. But there are other factors and even much more important factors as well. So marriage if you're a Muslim, and if you're a practicing Muslim, he you know, have to turn it into

an act of worship.

In a Lindsay Hadith,

the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam said to Saudi of your costs are the Allahu

wa sallam you're sad and naked and don't feel kinda forgotten that Arabia watch Allah, Allah Khattab Allahu La cambia ADRA.

And in brief, the Prophet sallallahu sallam said to Saudi wo cos, you got to understand that any spending, any spending that you spend, as long as you see the pleasure of Allah out of that, you will be rewarded for it. Hard to look tomato tomahto, happy fibrotic to the extent that wherever you feed your wife, and wherever you feed your kids with the food, the drink, the medications, you know, the clothing, whatever you spend on your family, you will be rewarded for because it's an act of charity from this pathogen. Of course, of course. And the reason behind

this prophetic statement is because Saudi Arabia will cost the hola Juan was a very wealthy companion. When he fell ill and he assumed that he's gonna die. So the Prophet sallallahu Sallam visited him. At the time Saudi wo cos was like a multimillionaire and he used to have only one daughter. So he consulted the Messenger of Allah peace be upon him Sadia Rasul Allah, you see what is happening to me, I may not make it and have a lot of money. I only have one girl. What is she going to do with all this money? So he thought, let me benefit out of this money as well by sharing it with the OMA and give it in a charity and I will be rewarded for that. So he decided, oh prophet

of Allah, I will just give her 1/3 And give this charity

two thirds

The Prophet SAW sent said don't do that.

Do not do that. He said, Okay, I will make it.

Have. But before that he intended to donate all his money. He said don't do that. Is it two thirds said not that either. Is it half and I would leave half for my daughter? Is it neither either? He said, Okay, the other way around. I will just donate 1/3 and I will keep two thirds for my wife. He said, okay, and still 1/3 is a lot. Then he remarked saying that, don't you think that whatever you feed your family with or leave for your family and for your wife? This is wasted. No, this is an act of charity as well. Yes. So it is yes, he said in NACA and Tatro Karateka Alinea hiraman anta traka home, I highlight any attack if a foreigner nurse Allah does want you to donate all your money then

your family after World will back. And you know what? Sad me will cause did not die in this sickness. Sad it will cause who had one door at the time left to have 30 plus kids 30 Plus, yeah, Masha, Allah, how many ways

so the catch in the hadith is this a lot of the catch in this story and the hadith is, you have to understand that

whenever you go to work, whenever your car to earn your living, to support your wife, and you make certain that you're earning from Hala, to provide for your family to put bread on the table, to send them to these schools, to hire tutors to teach them the deed, or science or maths, or whatever, as long as it is something beneficial. You are being rewarded for all of that, which is o'clock. So Paula, you're gonna just take a pause there Subhanallah beautiful reminders to soccer. So we're just gonna take a short break, so please just bear with us and we'll be right back. Solomonic counselor

Salam aleikum, Salah Welcome back to the fit of love.

Chef Subhanallah just before the break, we mentioned some more reasons why as Muslims, we should get married, some of the reasons we get married.

Can you tell us some other reasons why as Muslims, we should actually walk about the physical satisfaction.

And I think it's also important to shed some light on the moral satisfaction.

You know what happens when a person ends up with the good life mate with a good spouse? That is actually the greatest pleasure in this life. And the Hadith the Prophet sallallahu sallam said, at dunya meta, or hieromartyr, Isaiah, a Zelda to saleha the life of this world is enjoyment. There are many kinds of enjoyment, but the best of all, the best large

is when Allah blesses you with a righteous life, that is the best leisure in this life.

And the interpretation of that practically,

appears very obviously, in the Hadith, and the story of when the Prophet sallallahu sallam was in the cave. And he seemed the first why won't you realize the lamb had the pie? And he was so scared. So he rushed to his house and he rushed to Hadiya or the Allah Juana and he kept on saying the Milani is a millennial cover me up. Invalid me um, he was shivering. He was frightened.

But how do you do radi? Allahu anha assured him as follows. She says Wallahi Allah your physique Allahu Beda. Honey, you don't you worry by Allah, Allah, God will never put you down. God will never humiliate or disgrace you why?

She says, you know, you're the kindest person on earth. You uphold the ties of your kinship, you help the poor, you help the needy, yes, those who are in need. You take care of your family, you honor your guest. You're super nice. So she mentioned his good qualities in order to assure him that God will not let you down. There must be something good about it, that you're not aware of.

I want to bring up to the attention of the viewers and we remind each other

The fact that all of us on daily basis, we are confronted with many challenges in this life. Take for instance, when sometimes the person who has a decent job, a very good income, all of a sudden he's laid off.

And now he has payments on his car on his kids tuitions and on the house, and he is laid off. So, you know, what happens to many people in this condition, they take the lives.

I was watching on the sea. And after the financial crisis, I believe, almost 10 years ago, in the States, that there was a rise in the rate of

the suicide among millionaires 25%

some cases, the person killed himself and killed his family

took his life and the love of his family. Why because he cannot share with his wife, who are who is the closest person to him. Remember the I who nearly Messala coma and Tommy vessel on there Are your garments and your are their garments, but he he doesn't have the guts to tell his wife that he's laid off.

And they're not gonna be rich anymore. You know, this reminds me Did they say the loyalty of the woman is when the man is poor.

And the loads, the loyalty, the test of the proof of the loyalty of the man.

The test of that comes when he's rich, you know, because you kind of see, you know, how how the spouse is react, it actually goes both ways, especially in Western societies because both work, okay, and both earn. What I'm talking about is when the spouse is ready to morally support

and help the other party and give them the self esteem and assure them you will be okay. Don't worry about it, versus when the person is worried most about the reaction of his or her spouse. So the moral support and the moral satisfaction in marriage in a snap, when the person is married to the righteous spouse. The Prophet sallallahu Sallam says in the Hadith,

the best companionship is a companionship between the husband and his wife, the wife and her husband. And that's why in the Quran, he says Wausau, he bet he will have any Sahaba companion and here it refers to the wife.

So the Prophet sallallahu cinema says in the Hadith, it's a certain Hadith. May Allah have mercy on a man Rahim Allah Who Imran may Allah have mercy on a man

who gets up to pray at night. So this is voluntary format prayer, it's not mandatory. And instead of praying by himself, as many people do, he decides to wake up his wife, so she will join him in the night prayer, but she's still sleeping. So the Prophet sallallahu Sallam says, And he puts his fingers with water, and he splashes some water over her face. In order to wake her up, Honey, wake up, we're gonna pray to our gas together.

We're gonna read a few pages of the Quran together at night. Yeah, because clear Moonlight is the honor of the believer, you know?

And may Allah have mercy on a woman who wakes up to pray at night, and in our today's world, most of those who pray at night are the women

and men are asleep. I don't want to say snoring but they're working hard and they sell hamdulillah at least somebody at home is praying. So the prophets Allah, Allah, Allah cinema says, may Allah have mercy on a woman who wakes up at night to pray. And then she wakes up her husband to pray with her, he's going to be the Imam not the other way around. But if he's too sleepy, she does the same. She was her fingers with some water and splashes water over his face, in order to wake him up not to scare him off. Then the Prophet sallallahu sallam said for insomnia cootie bear Jamia Mina, Zachary and Allah with that killer. If it happens, and they got up to pray, even if it happened once,

then they will be recorded before Allah subhanaw taala among those who remember Allah much as a Korean Allah cathedra know that there have men or women, the reward is forgiveness for their sins. The reward is to admit them into gardens of Heavens beneath which rivers are flowing, Allah is pleased with them. Where can you find us? Only when you have the right spouse

I would assist you, and will be on the same page and will be very happy to assist you in this regard. espouse when you decide to give it a charity,

when you decide to give it to charity, she would help you out. She would actually encourage you, not the one who says we're more worthy. Don't give your mom didn't Don't give your brothers don't give your sisters, your nephews or nieces. We need this money even though they're very well off. Maybe his family are poor. In the Hadith, when the Prophet sallallahu Sallam quoted the Iron Man the love you crave Allah code that has an invisible bar if a hula hoop of often Kathira says, who is willing to give to Allah good alone and Allah will multiply the word for him many, many falls. So I would that there is a companion who owned a garden with like 600 palm trees, producing and barren lot of

dates. And so he says, Your rasool Allah,

the Almighty Allah is asking us for a goodly loan and he promises that if he gave the goodly loan, he will take you to heaven, and we'll give you a garden of paradise and agenda. It's so true, I said, Yes. He said, Oh, Prophet of Allah bear witness that my entire garden is for Allah sake is to be given. Put it wherever you are, give it to him ever you will to the poor, and to the needy. So the Prophet sallallahu Sallam accepted that from him, and he went home. And now he is not worried. What is he going to say to his wife? Because he knows he's certain that his wife is on the same page. It says, yeah, oh, Mama, Dada, come out. We're moving out. Why? Because their house was in the

garden. We're moving out because I donated the whole garden for Allah sake.

Oh, muda DA says, Congratulations. Successful indeed is your trade. Imagine, imagine if she is a woman who's after dunya. She would say You're crazy. You're out of your mind. I'm not coming out of this garden. This is my house. You go out, you know how many? How many women when their husbands decide after they travel to the States or to the UK and decide this is the right age to take my kids back to Muslim country to teach them the Quran to teach in the deen. I want my daughter to wear hijab and not to be chased by you know, Islamophobes I want my children to learn how to go to the masjid and pray. I want my kids to learn Arabic and Quran, n n n n n. And then the wife says, I'm

not going anywhere. Even though he's an American, and she's coming from this culture. She's coming from Egypt. She's coming from Pakistan, she's coming from Syria. And she says, This is home you go I'm not moving an inch. You know, this is this is an actually know a lot of situations like this, where families you know, instead of living in a Muslim country where they have the opportunity, and that's it. But as a matter of fact, that was the result of making of not making the right choice from the beginning. Because you have to be very clear. There isn't a Marian you and I chose you. The guy says to the woman and the woman says to the guy is to help me to enter agenda.

We have zero just before we finish this, that means you're finished now just before Okay, I just want to recap some of the some of the reasons, you know, for getting getting married, why we get married. So we said it's an act of worship, you know, companionship, it can be an act. If you intend to do so, of course you need the yes, the intention, you know, procreation and make the right choice, making the right choice. Satsang beautiful Subhanallah So, Inshallah, throughout the next few episodes, Inshallah, we'll go into a lot more detail regarding this inshallah. It's called, so of love, the fact of love.

So, that's all we have time for, for this particular episode. So, for those of you at home, I hope you're enjoying it so far. Subhanallah you know, we had a great,

you know, opportunity to spend some time with you and we like to thank you again, thank you for joining us whether it's very pleasant, if your company is very shallow, we'll get a chance to take a dip at some point Sharla she's gonna join us next time for another episode of the thick of love, I should say. Correct is o'clock is Friday.

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