Marriage – Deen Vs Culture Part 5

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Muhammad ibn Adam al-Kawthari

Channel: Muhammad ibn Adam al-Kawthari

Topics: Marriage

Episode Notes

Mufti Muhammad ibn Adam gives a talk on the importance of Marriage in Islam and the cultural influence that need to be squashed.

Episode Transcript

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Now marriage is in the second category like the everything else in the world is likely to revolve within the first category. I mean the aroma of actually discussing according to some scholars is actually you know, most do with the second category

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which is like if you make a good intention then actively bother like drinking water and stuff like that. Some What am I? What a third opinion you want to share with your loved one who was of that opinion? Remember? No, he was of that opinion, many scholars will have that opinion. And this is why you'll find many scholars who actually did not marry to give preference to Islam and you know, working for Islam serving the deen of Allah many months a moment No, you must have heard every moment no we the author of the other side of him, he never married all his life. He only lived like 40 years anyway, the amount of work he did Did you know you realize why he did that much work

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because you know, he never had to go Sainsbury and as every other week.

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Hell family you know, once you get a family you have responsibilities. Mr. Tamia Rahim Allah, he never married all his life. Imagine a beneficiary of poverty, if I remember correctly, he didn't marry as well. There's actually a whole book in Arabic. I don't think it's translated into English one of the great scholars of the recent times the share of many of my teachers Shaykh Abdul Fattah, habla de la I don't know if you've heard of him. Anybody heard of him? Very famous show. You know, one of the great muhaddith is passed away in the night. I used to met him. I was in Canada a couple of weeks ago, and his son Sheikh Mohammed Zaida would know who he was at the same event. And then

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I got to meet him handler. So he, his father, Sheldon Fatah, Hooda, who was actually Syrian, and then he moved to Saudi Arabia is to teach at the rear of the university, a great fapy, a great Hanafi fapy. And a great scholar of Hadith, probably the greatest Hadith of the last, you know, the latter part of the last century.

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He wrote a book called Allah reserved a levena earth or alma sawatch, those batuta scholars who gave preference to knowledge over marriage

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wants to be the bachelor here to give preference to

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knowledge over marriage. And he gave a biography of like 30 scholars, one or two females as well. One was a great Muslim, a great Mahabharata, Karima Alma Rosa.

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But the Allahu Allah, who did not marry because she was there busy teaching it to 1000s of students, bag collected these people they were of the opinion that look, being busy in these type of activities is more preferable than marriage. So that's one opinion. Okay, whereas the other opinion, which is the opinion of unimaginable hanifa for the Allahu anhu and many of the Imams of the Muslim Ummah,

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they say that no marriage, the act of the aspect of a bird is predominant. It's not like a worldly activity that it becomes like, you know, the drinking water, now in itself, like Salah is an act of a bird. And also some of them said, there is no act of a bird that

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started since the time of the Prophet Adam,

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and will remain, and he salatu salam will remain until the day of judgment and in the Hereafter, except one after the other, which is marriage, there is no Salah in the next life. There is no Zakat, there is no hedge, there's none of those types of activities, the only act of murder which was prescribed for Adam peace be upon him from his time till the Messenger of Allah sallallahu every sherea until they have judgment, even the next slide.

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It's an act of a bother. So we need to realize marriage is an act of a brother.

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It's not a cultural thing. It's not a you know, Bangladeshi thing or an Indian thing or a Pakistani thing. It's not something because you know, we do in a culture, it's an act of a bad Islamic thing. It's like offering Salah imagine someone offers salah and does

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unlawful activities while suffering Salah how bigger crime is that? Imagine you know I mean, I can give you the the most grave and serious of example, imagine somebody suffering Southern was drinking soda is drinking alcohol.

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Imagine Can you imagine someone doing that? Allahu Akbar and drinks alcohol. Anyone who's conducting a marriage ceremony in the marriage is this unlawful activity taking place. That's exactly the same example. Marriages are either

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marriages or burdah.

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You have to make an Islamic there has to be what we call toccoa the fear of Allah marriage, you know the hauteville the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam I told you I just talked about the hotel. You know the sermon. The sermon, which the messengers is called the hotel, which the messengers sort of love where Edison would recite. He used to recite three verses of taqwa.

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Here you anessa hora, Bakula de la camina camina xojo better

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Marry Jared and kathira when he saw a couple la Lita, Luna, or ham in the LA Galaxy merkiva verse number one, verse number two. Yeah, you're Latina. ermanno la haka Ducati. 11 two Muslim one, verse number three

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la wakulla Colin sadita

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welfare laku Welcome. When you pray Allah Rasulo for the further frozen alima now these three verses

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Don't even mention marriage. In other other verses Allah could have chose the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam could have picked and chosen any of the verse.

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You know there are verses relating to marriage and Mahara and dowry in the Quran. None of them were chosen.

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At the time of marriage, the word marriage nikka. One is not even mentioned in these verses.

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Why?

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What's in common? You know what's in common? The three verses of taqwa being conscious, realizing that every on every step of this venture, Allah is watching us. And the owner said the taco has to be a nickel, baton, anger, nickel, Nika, Nika, I don't have the time. But we need to have the fear of Allah God consciousness before marriage, at the time of marriage, and after marriage, before marriage, don't be involved and lovin illicit relationships start off on the right foot before marriage

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with that person, as well as in your own life. If somebody has habit of doing bad unlawful activities before marriage, unless, you know, he really sincerely repents, then it's given that after marriage, not gonna change anything. He just need to give a talk, where was it? This was my topic in Manchester University just couple of weeks ago.

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And I mentioned this, the whole talk was about abstinence, you know, relationships between husbands, sorry, between boyfriends and girlfriends and the whole thing I talked about. But, you know, some people think, okay, until marriage, and then after marriage, I sold myself out seriously.

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You know, I know, for a fact, if you have a habit before marriage, you could have 10 wives, you know, gonna switch this off.

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It's a disease. And these people actually talking about it as well, they actually now, you know, in the wake of all these Tiger Woods and john Terry stuff, you know, if you know, and there are actually heard a program on this, and they actually tried to categorize this as an illness. Now, this guy's got an illness, he can't be faithful.

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Considering a problem within a human being.

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Sometimes you think these people, you know, you should look at the wives, of course, but you think, you know, it's like, why would you have an affair with someone who's got a model?

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he's got he's got, you know, the most beautiful woman actually called somebody who was saying, I don't know if you guys know these names or not know that, if you don't know, 100 and a good, you know, you don't need to know about these people. But

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I certainly won't, but they came to me said, You know, I actually mentioned this in a talk a while ago, this brother came to see me said, it really makes sense what you said because I was just thinking, you know, this actually called his wife, you know, it's just like the top most beautiful woman in the world. Why would you need to go elsewhere? I say there's two reasons not just that one is like it's a it's it's, it's now it's become a habit. The other is that beauty is not what you just see. There's more to beauty than and that's why one of the things don't look at looks even brothers and sisters generally. Don't look at it looks too much. You know, there was a there was a

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once a survey where they were asking brother men and women non Muslims.

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What what's your priority in marriage and I think looks came close to the bottom for women, for men who was right at the top. But even for men don't, you know, beauties in the eye of the beholder. And I'm telling you beauty after marriage. You know, if you look at someone every single day of your life, when they wake up in the morning, when they've just come out on the shower, when they've just gone to the toilet and when they're crying when they're happy. You know, you see them 24 hours, that beauty becomes normal, natural to you can have the most beautiful person in the world. If you're looking at a face every day in your life.

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It becomes absolutely normal. doesn't make a difference. Now.

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You know, when you look at someone else's, maybe half the beauty of your spouse. Right? But they'll see more beautiful because it's just once you look

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these are serious issues. I mean, these are practical issues. I'm telling you