DONATION APPEAL!

ALL our Projects are FREE and with no advertisements.

We serve millions of downloads a month... Now! Imagine earning on-going rewards of every lecture and quran audio and so on.

As well as helping us cover our running costs and future projects!

mufti menk image

"I really think this is one of the greatest causes one could support"

    Become a Patron
    Donate via PayPal

More Information and Options

When They Say Bad things About You

share this pageShare Page
Mufti Menk

Channel: Mufti Menk

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:00--> 00:00:02

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh

00:00:04--> 00:00:14

Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim al hamdu Lillah wa Salatu was salam, ala rasulillah hawala, Allah, he was happy as mine, my beloved brothers and sisters,

00:00:15--> 00:00:26

every one of us in our lives, we will go through times when we hear that people have said bad things about us. We have to

00:00:27--> 00:00:33

we will hear that people have said things that are untrue about us, unfair about us.

00:00:34--> 00:00:36

And this has to happen.

00:00:38--> 00:00:39

Why does it happen?

00:00:40--> 00:01:18

It happens because when Allah created us, He promised us that he's going to test us and he sent to us a messenger. And that messenger taught us what to do, what not to do. And Allah subhanho wa Taala says, if you were to follow the example of that messenger, you would not go wrong. So therefore, in the life of that messenger, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, Allah subhanho wa Taala has definitely kept something amazing and unique Subhan Allah, what is it that is unique? He has been through times when people have said untrue things about him,

00:01:19--> 00:01:22

things that are unjustified.

00:01:23--> 00:01:36

So he has been through that so behind Allah, Allah subhanho wa Taala has chosen that if any one of us is to fulfill the Sunnah of the prophet muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam

00:01:37--> 00:02:29

we would need to go through many things that he went through, and Allah would be testing us how's your reaction? That's it. So when someone says bad things about you, lies about you behind your back in front of you when someone falsely accuses you. The first thing you need to do as a believer, the one who has declared La ilaha illAllah Muhammad Rasul Allah, the One who has declared there is none worthy of worship besides Allah, and Muhammad peace be upon him is his messenger. The first thing you need to do is to thank Allah. Wow, it might sound strange, I'm telling you when someone says something bad about you, in front of you, or behind you, thank Allah. Thank Allah Alhamdulillah

00:02:29--> 00:03:28

Alhamdulillah don't I sound a little bit cuckoos a little bit crazy. The reality is no, Allah has chosen you Mashallah tabarrok Allah, Allah has chosen you to do what Allah is just preparing you to give you that opportunity to go through a certain sooner, that it is impossible to go through until and unless someone accuses you or says hurtful hateful things about you. lies about you and so on. How am I going to fulfill a sooner of bearing patience upon what people have said, When no one said anything bad about me? So Angela, now do you see where the Alhamdulillah comes from? Allah says, FOSS be Allah Maya punto amazing verse. Be patient regarding what they are saying against you. How

00:03:28--> 00:04:07

am I going to be patient with no one said anything against me? So for that, it's impossible for you and I to lead a reasonably long life without someone somewhere down the line. doing really nasty things against you. It's more about your relationship with Allah. That's what it is. You believe in Allah? Yes, I do. He created you. Yes, he did. Indeed. I'm going to return to him while he is the master planner, giving you an opportunity to pay patients upon evil speech, hurtful, hateful untruths, accusations against you bear patients

00:04:09--> 00:04:50

cordana llamo in hula zunow Catalunya co one of my favorite verses, I'm sure you've heard me say that many times. If you have followed a few of my talks, Allah says we know that what they're saying hurts you. We know it saddens you actually the term used is hosen. It saddens you know, we saw Selim was saddened primarily because he knew those people are actually engaging in a disservice against themselves. I asked you a question. You're a good person, brother or sister. You are innocent. You are straight. You are upright.

00:04:51--> 00:04:59

And SubhanAllah. Here you have people saying bad things about you and you know they're telling a lie. You should say Alhamdulillah

00:05:00--> 00:05:01

And feel sorry for them.

00:05:02--> 00:05:42

feel sorry for them. The prophet SAW Selim was saddened because he was sorry about them and for them to say they don't know what they're doing. Allahu madico me for inola Allah moon what amazing statement Oh Allah guide my people they don't know what they're doing. Imagine, Allah chose you your remote mean, in the case of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he was, he is the Messenger of Allah, the Most love done to Allah. What was he saying? Did he curse them and sway them and fight back? Like what we would do? Subhan Allah, someone says, You are stupid. You say you, your mother, your father and your family are stupid. That's what we would say. I hope not anymore. I hope it's

00:05:42--> 00:06:07

not true. I hope what I've just said is not true. But sometimes that's how we react, we think we're a big deal. Someone says something about you, you sway him and his whole community. So panela don't do that. Do you know your worth? Do you doubt your worth? I don't doubt my worth. My brothers and sisters, their evil must not make us lose our good. You heard what I just said.

00:06:08--> 00:06:45

You will be judged by Allah based on your qualities, your statements, not on someone else's statements. So when they said something bad that was between them and Allah, they will be judged by what they've said. But because of your slight involvement in the sense that you're the third party on the receiving end. Now Allah is watching you to say, but what are you going to do? on his side, he failed on her side, she failed because of what she said, You have an opportunity to pass or fail. Here it is, we're going to show you the sooner and we've revealed a few verses to guide you. And you know what, let's see whether you're going to take heed or not. Take it in your stride. Don't get

00:06:45--> 00:07:08

angry. Anger is from Shay pan. Don't get angry. So what they showed their colors, those colors are not mine. I will still smile all the ways to panela and I know you don't butter, my bread, my beloved brother or sister, you want to speak bad about me. My bread and the butter comes from Allah Subhana Allah, just make sure that butter is sent approved.

00:07:10--> 00:07:33

My beloved brothers and sisters, look at how we should be looking at negativity, look at negativity with a positive eye. That's the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu sallam. I'm not saying don't do anything about it and sit back, relax, let them trample all over. You know, that's not true. But I'm saying don't lose your great character and conduct because someone else lost this.

00:07:34--> 00:08:03

Yours. You're your own man, people are watching you. And not only that, you are supposed to be a role model and an example for those younger than you be they your family members, children, whoever else your community members, they are watching you, especially as you grow a little bit older, you automatically become a senior. They will love you and have tremendous respect for you when they can see that this person is very, very wise. They are mature. They are good Muslims, they don't bother with the detractors.

00:08:04--> 00:08:35

Today we have a sickness and an illness. What is it? People talk bad about everybody else? That's from shaytan now I'm talking about the person engaging in the crime. When you want to talk bad about others you must remember the loss is yours. It's never there's never this. You want to accuse someone hurt them harm them, abuse them, utter vulgar language against them. Someone sways you. What should you do first? You know what we do? I don't even need to say it. Come on. You know what we do? Someone's sways you.

00:08:36--> 00:08:46

So finally I see people nodding their heads. I hope you guys don't have guns in your pockets. Because someone swears you you know people in this country they would actually draw their weapons.

00:08:48--> 00:09:00

May Allah protect us? That's wrong. Someone's ways you you smile and walk away Don't even turn towards them. First be Rolla Maya kuno Noah Jo home Haji.

00:09:02--> 00:09:43

jameelah. Look at how Allah speaks about it. Allah says Be patience. And you know what, ignore them in a good way. Leave them in a nice way. Stay away from them. don't communicate with someone whose intention is to rile you up every day they come to you and tell you one bad thing. They riling you up. The one who can rile you up is controlling you the one who can anger you has control over you. They want you to be foolish. So what do they do? They know we need this guy to get angry. When he gets angry. He's going to hit someone when he hit someone will do he mean for public violence. And we'll get him to sign this admission of guilt to pay the fine and possibly to be in jail. So they've

00:09:43--> 00:09:47

planned it before you even understood what has happened. And when they come they just watch

00:09:48--> 00:09:57

by remote control what's happening to you. You control but you can break the entire plan this way. You You just smile back. How's it

00:09:58--> 00:09:59

sway you again you're

00:10:00--> 00:10:24

Is everything good? They call you fcmb is a guy, everything laka Subhana Allah when that happens, they will get so frustrated, so irritated because they plan has failed. That's what the Quran is telling you don't let people's plans pass, you must understand. There are people out there who will be hating you disliking you for something.

00:10:25--> 00:10:28

When you see others succeed in anything,

00:10:29--> 00:11:11

do you get jealous? Do you get envious? Would you like to see their downfall? If that's the case, you need help. You need to connect with a law. You need to actually build your relationship with Allah subhanho wa Taala. It is Allah who gave him He will give you work hard. Pray for them, thank Allah for them. Don't become jealous because you know what? That jealousy leads to enmity, enmity leads to hatred, and hatred can lead to war Subhanallah you hate someone what will happen? You begin to hurt them harm them fighting, then it becomes physical. And sometimes it goes beyond that. People literally go to war. Because that business is doing this business. Look at the wars that are

00:11:11--> 00:11:28

happening outside. I'm no one to come into because I haven't studied it deeply. But every day we hear about taxi wars. And this was and that's what what is it about? It's all about sustenance and money and nothing else. Your company's doing well, I don't want it. I want it for myself. So what do they do? They shoot each other.

00:11:29--> 00:11:37

I still veto law. Like I said, I'm not an expert in that field. But we read what's going on sometimes in the headlines, and we feel sorry for the people

00:11:38--> 00:12:20

Subhanallah you know, I always speak about buttering bread. And I just said earlier, who owns the bread and the butter Allah, you don't butter my bread. And you shouldn't be thinking that anyone else is going to butter your bread when they are oppressing you and harming you. I always tell those who have employed others. Please respect the employees. respect them. You know why? Because Allah has chosen for them to be there and he's just watching you don't think I got the money. And I'm the one who's the boss here. So I can say what I want to whoever works for me because tomorrow, it can turn around or with your children. It might turn around who knows? And I always tell people you know

00:12:20--> 00:12:20

what,

00:12:21--> 00:12:52

Allah Almighty is the giver. Allah is the one I'd rather have less with dignity than have more with total disrespect and dishonor. You got a post of a big manager but they swear you every day, every day. And you are belittled and you are put to shame every I'd rather walk out and say you know what? I have my honor, my dignity, I'll have less but inshallah walk away. Remember, Allah will definitely record what's happening when you treat someone badly.

00:12:53--> 00:13:35

I said this a few weeks ago, I have to say it again. When you treat someone badly, it's a date against your name. It's coming back for you. It will come for you. So panela when five years 10 years 20 years in you or someone around you something specialty it's coming. Allow will never let it go. But he gives you time to make peace. So before anything happens, go to those who've wronged and apologize. say look, I'm very sorry. You know, I spoke to you very rough. I'm a human. Sometimes I actually you know, lose it a bit but i don't i mean well and so make peace, because what did you do? You raised that ball that was coming back to put you straight on your head. You threw the ball? May

00:13:35--> 00:13:37

Allah subhanho wa Taala protect the soul.

00:13:39--> 00:13:42

Now let me take you through that Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam

00:13:44--> 00:13:46

we follow his sooner

00:13:47--> 00:13:49

How can I pray?

00:13:51--> 00:14:08

For those who have wronged me? When I feel no one has really wronged me. So Allah says, Wait, we're going to create someone who's in the wrong you do something wrong. Then we can adjust watch. Do you react how the prophet SAW Selim reacted or do you do your own thing? If you decide I'm going to take a page from

00:14:09--> 00:14:26

then a B of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam? First thing you do Alhamdulillah then you pray for them or like guide these people. Oh Allah soften their hearts. That's not easy. Measuring the prophet SAW Selim was praying for a boudjellal. He was an enemy, and he was praying for him.

00:14:27--> 00:14:53

He says Allah, soften the hearts of at least one of these two, and bring them to Islam. So that at least the strength that they have, they can use it towards the deen how many of us would ever pray those type of prayers for our enemies? And then we claim to be solid followers, you know? Subhana Allah, I Who are you? Well, I'm on the tsunami way to relax. The sooner is so broad that only a prophet of Allah sallallahu Sallam could actually fulfill all of it.

00:14:54--> 00:14:59

We can only fulfill pockets of it as best as we can, as best as we can mail us

00:15:00--> 00:15:44

Links in us. May Allah grant us good guidance. These words that I've uttered today are simply a reminder for myself, because I'm also human. It happens to me too. You have people saying really nasty things about you. You get used to it Subhanallah you have to pray for them. You have to thank Allah soften the hearts and guess what? The hearts are softened by Allah. He softened the heart of Amara, or the Allahu anhu. He soften the hearts of 1000s of those who had intended to harm the messenger sallallahu Sallam they became lovers of the messenger of peace be upon him that anyone day take the name of the prophets of Salaam in a negative way and they are dealt with so Han Allah so

00:15:44--> 00:16:10

much. So Amara is recorded to have almost drawn his sword for someone who insulted the messenger and he says that ni agree boo kochava Luna VTR Rasul Allah, He says, Oh Allah, let me swipe at the neck of this guy with my sword. He's a hypocrite. And the professor Selim says no or Omar, take it easy. We will not sent to kill these people around us no ways.

00:16:12--> 00:16:23

But he was angry, upset. My brothers and sisters, they were trained by the professor seldom to come down, come down, think about what's going on.

00:16:24--> 00:16:56

And when someone does something against you, and I tell yourself will lie, he This is my chance, my chance to engage in an act of worship, that I would never have been able to engage in, had it not been for this issue. And this problem Subhana Allah, I want to end off by telling you one thing interesting. Many of us go through Divorce, Divorce is not a bad thing. If it is the last resort, it happens. People have been through it the Sahaba of the Allahu anhu have been through it. What is bad,

00:16:57--> 00:17:00

is what you're going to do after that if it is negative.

00:17:02--> 00:17:47

So divorce, you've been through it, it's a test from Allah. Are you going to stoop so low? That after that you're going to speak bad about your ex spouse, or you're going to let it go, because that was the whole problem. And you're going to proceed and progress today. People don't realize that we have made lives more difficult after divorce than it was when they were in the marriage that didn't work simply because we've got a problem. These kids are mine and not yours, my brother, my sister, they are ours. Not yours, not mine. They belong to Allah entrusted to the two of us, Allah chose we're going to have kids, and it's no way what you say, Oh, I say it's what Allah says. If

00:17:47--> 00:18:09

you're ready to do that you are a true mock meme. If not, you failed your test, you're still going to go to the Day of Judgment. And when you go there, only Allah knows what's going to happen to you don't ever get into a habit of saying, I'm going to sort this out on the Day of Judgment, because the wisest of people sorts it out here in this world before the hereafter because when you get on that day, you don't know you might just be the one who was wrong.

00:18:10--> 00:18:49

May Allah subhanho wa Taala make it easy for us. So divorce is something that happens in order to open doors of new ibadah that you would have never been able to fulfill had you not gone through that divorce. So Allah just testing you, okay, you went through this? What are you going to do? You either pass it or you fail it say good things about your ex spouse. I want to tell you what to say. You can say, You know what? I believe I was a good person. I believe she was a good person, a reasonable person. We didn't get along we had our differences. We may have done a few things wrong to each other May Allah forgive us. I'm not prepared to go beyond that. That's a wise man. You pray

00:18:49--> 00:19:24

you saved your tongue for the Day of Judgment. Man can I you know be nah he will yameen aka defuniak will hire and only a small whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day say good words or remain silent because you know, whatever you say is going to be held against you. May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us goodness and forgiveness and May Allah make us such that we don't utter bad words about others. And we when someone says something bad about us, we take it in our stride we thank Allah and we bear suffer and we deal with it in a positive way so that we can prove them wrong. You know when someone calls you a dog

00:19:25--> 00:19:26

if you get angry

00:19:28--> 00:19:30

Subhana Allah you've lost

00:19:31--> 00:19:45

because if you were a dog they look exactly like you anyway. It would make them the same species you know the last time Okay, let me end on this light note I know I said I would end a little bit earlier but Mashallah, it's not every time that I come to Newlands.

00:19:47--> 00:19:48

There was a guy on the street

00:19:50--> 00:19:52

and I was driving

00:19:53--> 00:19:54

and for some reason

00:19:56--> 00:19:59

the when the traffic light turned red, there is a little

00:20:00--> 00:20:38

solid line you get to three solid lines day. So my bumper must have crossed the first solid line. He looked at me said dog I said, woof woof Subhana Allah, he was just laughing He was gone, you know Subhanallah because he wanted to give me angry. And so the way I responded I just said woof woof. And he is like, This man is crazy, you know? And he started laughing. You know, human. I could have gotten English at you with a dog, you cow, you reduce your relax, take it easy. Why are you overreacting to something that's my inner if he called you a dog guess what he looks just like you Subhan Allah. May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us forgiveness and the beautiful lesson akula Cali

00:20:38--> 00:20:40

ha sallallahu ala nabina