Mufti Menk – The Prophet PBUH – The Best Husband

Mufti Menk
AI: Summary © The speakers discuss the importance of acknowledging hate and respecting people, as well as learning to love one another and not discounting others. They stress the need for forgiveness and the importance of peace and good deeds in judgeate analysis. The speakers also touch on the historical context of the Prophet sallavi alayhi wa sallam and its use in relation to love, as well as the importance of strong relationships and not requesting everything. They emphasize the need for acceptance and understanding in the workplace and the importance of being romantic and not requesting everything.
AI: Transcript ©
00:00:08 --> 00:00:14

smilla rahmanir rahim al hamdu Lillah wa salatu salam ala rasulillah who Allah Allah He was happy as

00:00:16 --> 00:00:50

we praise Allah subhanho wa Taala we send blessings and salutations upon Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam his household, his companions. May Allah bless them and bless every one of us and grant us goodness my brothers, my sisters, we all are very, very blessed by Allah subhanho wa Taala. The biggest blessing that Allah has bestowed upon us is a man. We have believed in Allah, in Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, in the message that came to us from Allah subhanho wa Taala through the messenger sallallahu alayhi, wasallam

00:00:55 --> 00:00:57


00:00:58 --> 00:00:59


00:01:02 --> 00:01:17

fusi him, Allah has bestowed a great favor upon the believers, when he sent from amongst them a messenger, a messenger from amongst them, what did the messenger do, yet knew him.

00:01:19 --> 00:01:31

he recited to them the verses of Allah, He guided them, he purified them, he taught them the path to purity, etc, etc, etc. What a great favor of Allah.

00:01:32 --> 00:02:21

So what we need to know and realize is we say the Shahada eyeshadow, Allah Ilaha, Illallah, Muhammad and Abu rasuluh, I bear witness that there is none worthy of worship, mark those words, I bear witness that there is none worthy of worship, besides Allah Lama Abu Dhabi happening in Allah. And I bear witness that Muhammad peace be upon him is the Messenger of Allah, the final prophet of Allah subhanho wa Taala. Mark those words, because many of us say this, but we do otherwise. However, once we've declared the Shahada, we become one big family. Thereafter, we will have differences of opinion based on differences of understanding, all our brains are not the same. All the brains of

00:02:21 --> 00:02:41

the scholars are not the same. All the brains of the Sahaba, the Allahu anhu, were not equivalent in in understanding Abdullah nabasa, viola and Homer, for example, His understanding level was different from those of others. So what we need to know is, and I'm saying this because I've been traveling across the globe,

00:02:42 --> 00:02:50

witnessing that the Muslims are being killed by none other than others who are saying the same Shahada calling themselves Muslim

00:02:52 --> 00:03:07

killing, and it starts off with the spewing of hate, may Allah protect us from this, when you differ with someone respect the opinion, understand they have a right to disagree you may want to discuss you may want to, for example,

00:03:08 --> 00:03:53

exchange what you have with them and see what is best some people follow the Quran and the Sunnah, in a literal fashion, it is also a legitimate way of looking at things. Some people follow it in a non literal fashion. That is another way of looking at things you remember, they are uttering the Shahada, the aim is to please Allah subhanho wa Taala. So to think that my way is the only way My view is the only view perhaps people may think their view is correct. But remember, others also have a view, they have an opinion, do not spew hate and claim that you are the only one who has the correct understanding. Always go back to the Koran and the sooner we speak about it. The Prophet

00:03:53 --> 00:04:04

sallallahu Sallam says, I have left with you two things, if you hold fast upon them, you will never go astray what were these two, the Quran and the Sunnah of Rasulullah sallallahu sallam.

00:04:05 --> 00:04:44

So it's important I say this because we notice sometimes even in our own midst, where people come across so passionately that they are insulting others and creating a feeling in the heart of hate towards a particular person instead of sometimes the detesting or the dislike of a sin. When there is someone who is consuming alcohol, a person in the clubs, a person who is doing something terrible, you and I know what they're doing is wrong, but don't you have hope for them? Don't you keep trying with them? Don't you keep talking to them? Don't you keep making dua to Allah for them? If they are your children, wouldn't you love that someone try to guide them etc, when we are all

00:04:44 --> 00:04:59

brothers and sisters. So I start in this fashion because we should seek the forgiveness of Allah in the name of the one who was sent as a mercy to mankind we are merciless, in the name of the Lord who calls himself Rahmani Raheem.

00:05:00 --> 00:05:14

We perpetrate crimes, we create such hate, that we don't even want to respond to a greeting of a person because we think that he doesn't have my understanding. So he is not worth looking at. In fact, he is worth eradicating.

00:05:17 --> 00:05:20

In the name of the Most Merciful way, Allah says,

00:05:21 --> 00:05:31

that is Allah the Most Merciful is Allah and the one who was filled with the most mercy after that is Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. wama

00:05:32 --> 00:06:18

illa Allah me, we have not sent you except as a means of mercy to the alameen what mercy Do we have upon one another when we have so much hate? The one who was sent with mercy? We use his name we claim to be ambassadors, we label someone in a way that we want to literally harm them, we make their blood halaal there is a term used gusta Hara soon. That means a person who has insulted the messenger sallallahu wasallam. Yes, indeed, we will not tolerate those who want to insult because we are human beings filled with love. But we need to remember something when the term is used to incite you to kill someone. Voila, he that is exactly the work of a foreigner

00:06:19 --> 00:06:25

in the name of the one cent as mercy. Look at Harley Davidson, Waleed Ravi Alon, Omar.

00:06:26 --> 00:07:06

All these companions of Allah subhanho wa Taala. Take a look at them. Before they used to be enemies of Islam, what happened? They were not just eradicated. They were worked upon the Prophet SAW Selim made for them, he was sent as a mercy he was not sent as a killer. He was not sent as a brutal person to spread hate amongst those who follow him. He was not sent to label those who might have a little opinion this way or that way, who need guidance as people who deserve to be killed. But that's what we are doing. The scholars from amongst us are doing this. The scholars from amongst us are doing this. They label a man and they expect their followers to quietly go and kill him because

00:07:06 --> 00:07:49

you know what, he did something unforgivable. Oh, who are we we are claiming to do this in the name of the Most Merciful, the most forgiving, the most current, the most compassionate, the most magnificent, and the one who was sent also sallallahu alayhi wasallam as a mercy to Allah mean that not only mankind, but all worlds WE ARE WE Why do we allow shaytan to infiltrate us when a scholar is making a mistake, it is a mistake, it will lay in your face in mind, you can excuse him, he is not an abuse of Allah, he cannot come about and spew hate and claim that he is doing the message or conveying the message of the one who came with love and mercy. Remember this, this is the reason why

00:07:49 --> 00:08:03

we are killing each other across the globe. I've traveled to more than 60 countries where I've seen Muslims literally either fighting each other spreading the worst hate or it goes to killing each other. If we don't mention this, we are failing.

00:08:05 --> 00:08:46

So express your view and follow it. Let the other man express his view and follow it. Respect the difference of opinion. Don't force someone to believe exactly what you believe. Don't force them. They will be answerable to Allah you cannot force someone they will believe differently and they will definitely believe I am doing this because I believe this is what Nabi saw Salam wanted. I give you an example of the molad when it comes to the Mali view, and I know that there is more than one opinion. Some people believe that if the Prophet sallallahu Sallam did not do something, they will never ever do it. Leave them they are okay they are fine when they get to Allah they're going to say

00:08:46 --> 00:09:29

Oh Allah I was so scared to do something the messenger didn't expressly do and the companions did not completely do so I kept it out. He's not going to be punished he's got a good enough answer. Why do we have to spew hate because they didn't do it the way we did it and we label them whatever. And we want to create disaster in the oma your view is not the only acceptable view in Islam. There are people who really want to do things out of the love of the prophets Allah Salaam and you are busy calling them gusta Hara soon for what they are doing it out of the love of Allah. They are people who celebrate the mo lead every day by fulfilling as many soon as they can of the beloved Nabi

00:09:29 --> 00:10:00

sallallahu sallam, we cannot call them gusta Hara soon, we cannot we are really wrong if we do that. We are spewing hate if we want to dance in the mosque. We can perhaps do that. But we will not ever ever point at someone who doesn't want to engage in what we are engaging in. And we call them big, big names in order to spew hate in the oma for what why? This is another opinion discuss it, let's talk about it. Let's express the evidences but with respect with different

00:10:00 --> 00:10:24

With the Christians and the Jews, but we treat them with greater respect than we treat our own brothers who are sharing the Shahada with us. And we want to say this is how the prophets of Salaam taught us to be a, come on my brothers, come on, let's wake up, we are going to be killing each other very soon. If we continue in this way, learn to understand your way is not the only way. And it's not the only way in the eyes of Allah subhanho wa Taala.

00:10:25 --> 00:11:02

You will continue living and respecting people, the Jews from amongst us, we respect them, we do business with them, we sometimes say Wow, what a good man, because it's permissible. But the Muslims who are de la ilaha illa Allah because the man doesn't do things exactly the way we do. We start calling him such big names we spit in his face. And we don't we want to say that you know what this person should be eradicated? Well, ah, it's happening. Look at the countries where this is happening killings on a daily basis. people's lives are at stake simply because they didn't follow our understanding. You ask them why did you do this? Why do you not do this? Or why do you do this? They

00:11:02 --> 00:11:38

will tell you this is firmly what I believe is correct. I'm doing it because I want to follow Rasulullah sallallahu sallam, they are people who've asked on a Monday, and they say this is our way of actually celebrating what blessing Allah bestowed upon us by the birth of Muhammad Sallallahu sallam, when they asked him or messenger sallallahu sallam, why do you fast on a Monday, he said that was the day I was born. So every week they are fasting Monday and Thursday. for them. That is the greatest way to celebrate Subhanallah let them have it their way. According to them, they don't want to do anything that wasn't done in the past. There's no point in arguing and shoving people's

00:11:38 --> 00:11:43

opinions down, you're down their throats. May Allah have mercy on us.

00:11:45 --> 00:11:48

You might wonder where does the loving husband come in all of this?

00:11:49 --> 00:11:52

Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us understanding.

00:11:53 --> 00:12:26

May Allah bless us it was a passionate cold, I did not plan to actually say the way it came out. But perhaps it's the house of Allah, we need to learn to love one another. You need to learn to have a feeling for those who utter the Shahada. And we need to learn to discuss matters and we need to learn to to look at other opinions and why they are being followed rather than just, you know, discard them and discount them completely. Without even understanding what has happened. You may be free to discard and discount, but be respectful. We owe it to the generations to come Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam

00:12:27 --> 00:12:51

was the example what prompted me to say this was we perpetrate crimes in our own homes with our family members, in the name of Islam, people are abusive to their wives. And today we're talking about the husbands So please, my beloved brothers, you will have to absorb what I'm saying and understand it because today we are addressing the loving husbands that topic.

00:12:52 --> 00:13:31

People abused their wives, they swear them they beat them up and say Islam allows me to do that when it does not. And they say well, I'm following the sooner sometimes you know when you see a person looking so religious, you won't believe when their wife says this man swears big big swear words huge. He comes in the house and he rolls and he he beats us up and he shows us a verse of the Quran to say hang this verse up, I'll show you what Allah has allowed me to do I owe the bill. What misinterpretation My beloved brothers and sisters, in the name of the one in the name of the one will lie who was sent as a mercy you are merciless in your own home? Have you thought of that? In

00:13:31 --> 00:13:49

the name of the one who was sent as a mercy? You are merciless in your own home? And then you want to claim to be a follower of Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam How can that be? May Allah subhanahu wa taala grant us the true acknowledgement of the gift of Rasulullah salam to us

00:13:50 --> 00:14:36

follow his way and he shall have the law says he was never abusive. Anna Sydney Malika the Allahu anhu says not only to his wives, but never did he say even to those who worked for him. He never, ever said to anyone. Why did you do this with us? We swear them, we shouted them, the food is burned, something happens. It's a test for us. We lose our cool Subhan Allah May Allah subhanahu wa taala grant us forgiveness. And all this is done in the name of the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, we claim to be his followers, religious five Salah a day, sometimes six because you are up for that. But your mouth is fouled with your own family members and here comes the most blessed from

00:14:36 --> 00:14:38

amongst us the most blessed and he says

00:14:42 --> 00:14:46

God knows the best from you. The best to his wife.

00:14:47 --> 00:14:59

The best from amongst you are those who are best to their wives, their family members Why? charity begins at home. On the day of piano Yes, you will be judged by whom? By Allah regarding what yes or

00:15:00 --> 00:15:39

your good deeds, your Salah, your Sokka, etc. One of the things he's going to judge you by is how you treated your family. How do I know that? Because for the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him to tell you and I that the best from amongst you is the best to the wife or the best to the family. That automatically means on the Day of Judgment, it's one of the major points that I'm going to be judged by. So go out of your way to be the kindness and the best. Even if your folks are not Muslim. Remember, you have a duty unto them. Allah chose your mother Be kind to her. She may not want to see your face but you continue to be kind. There is no excuse not to be kind. Don't raise your voice and

00:15:39 --> 00:15:46

swear them and yell at them, etc. Sometimes you can excuse yourself very politely. But don't be disrespectful.

00:15:48 --> 00:16:20

The same applies to your wife, somebody's daughter, vulnerable, it's easy to scream and yell at this woman Allahu Akbar. When you understand that Allah has greater control over you. When you have over your family members, you will come down automatically it's a sign of the closeness to Allah. It is an Amana imagine you have a daughter excitedly the wedding happens, everything else happens you get her married Mashallah, suddenly a year later you hear that that son in law of yours is raising his hand on her. How would you feel Subhan Allah?

00:16:21 --> 00:16:56

Well, in Cape Town, you might go and raise a gun at him. May Allah subhanho wa Taala not let that happen, I hope is just a BB gun. In fact, that's on a lighter note, it shouldn't even happen. But my brothers and sisters in reality the minimum is you'd be hurt. How dare you do this I gave you my daughter. All I want from you is to respect her. That's it. You don't abuse your spouse not at all the Prophet peace be upon him says it clearly. That the best from amongst you those who are best to your family members, starting with your wife. Are you ready for that? You want to follow Mohammed Salah salam, you want to celebrate the moment we'll start off by being the best to your wife. Start

00:16:56 --> 00:17:06

off by being the best to whom, to your family members, you have celebrated the life of Rasulullah sallallahu. He stood for that. He says how you come to come to come.

00:17:08 --> 00:17:52

The best form amongst you are those whose character is the best. you've developed it. I need to develop my character. The best form amongst you are those who are more beneficial to the rest of mankind. How do I benefit mankind? How do I benefit mankind? So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he treated his family with utmost respect goodness and kindness. Remember those words? The first words, he treated his family with utmost respect, goodness and kindness, and then the profits of our salon when he had some important matters related to the house and sometimes other matters, he would ask his family members for their opinions. He would ask it Chateau de la vida de gente de la

00:17:52 --> 00:18:37

earlier, he would seek a little bit of opinion. What's your opinion? What do you think of this? How many of us ask our wives so panela many of us would just dish out an instruction. Listen 10 o'clock, you should be here. Look at me with a smile. Come on. to smile is a charity when it happens on the face of another What about your own family? It's a double and triple charity some annaleigh a smile was sought out many many problems may Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us ease. The third point I want to raise never be vulgar the prophets of Salaam did not abuse he never ever raised his hand upon any one of his wives. Never. You want to follow the Prophet sallallahu Sallam never ever lifted a hand

00:18:37 --> 00:19:07

never. Not at all. That is the Sunnah of the Prophet salla salon, not only raising hand, don't abuse don't say hurtful words. The Prophet sallahu wa sallam never said he didn't say why didn't you do this when they did not do something? He didn't even do that to his own servants, let alone his family members. When they asked Sharia law. How did the prophets of Salaam spend his time at home? She said he used to help us with the work we used to do.

00:19:09 --> 00:19:28

I remember a young man a few weeks ago when we spoke about helping the wife doing things at home Subhanallah he said well that was assuming that it's in one ad it's not in one ad and even if it was so what the she already said he used to the fact that she said he used to shows that it was habitual. It was not just a one off thing.

00:19:30 --> 00:19:42

We make a big deal out of things. May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us goodness when we do a small thing. It's a big issue. You know what learn to help at home learn to assist at home.

00:19:43 --> 00:19:59

And I know my beloved sisters let's not use that as an excuse and say you know what, right? Did you hear the lecture today? That's it you do all the work? No, it is given take it is mutual. It is an understanding. You need to be conscious. You need to understand have a feeling be sensitive.

00:20:00 --> 00:20:04

regarding what they are going through, be sensitive in that regard.

00:20:05 --> 00:20:07

May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us goodness and ease.

00:20:08 --> 00:20:26

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was such a beautiful person that he used to dress up beautifully and apply perfume when he used to go home to his family. How many of us we want our women to look nice, but you look like a temp Allahu Akbar.

00:20:27 --> 00:20:51

And then we come and complain, she never dresses up for me. Well, do you dress up for her? It's as soon as you want to follow the Prophet peace be upon him. You want to know what kind of husband he was used to smell so good. That looks so good. So Angela used to say such good words he used to joke with his family. The environment in the home was loving. It was kind hours, cat and mouse, cat and mouse SubhanAllah.

00:20:52 --> 00:20:56

We enter and the whole environment is missed in the house.

00:20:57 --> 00:21:38

The prophet SAW Selim used to joke at times he used to narrate stories, see his family down and talk to them tell them stories about this and about that, like the heartbeat of Missouri. A nice story. The prophet SAW Selim speaks about things he used to say things we don't have time for the family, you get home, it's either it used to be way back about newspapers. Then it became the TV now it is the phone so panela you in your at home and you're on the phone. What are you doing on the phone, Subhan Allah, they are real life people right in front of you go and follow the sooner you claim to be a Muslim. While you are very far from Islam. You only have a small portion of Islam, the prophet

00:21:38 --> 00:22:14

SAW, Selim used to spend time speaking to his family, many of the women if they heard an Islamic lecture, they will go home and narrate it and relate it. I know they might remember only the potions that actually you know, relevant to them. But in actual fact, men complain chef, you always talk about how men should be. You don't ever talk about how women should be. So I asked them how many lectures of mine Have you heard? And they say, well, by the way, I don't really listen to you. So then how can you tell me how can you tell me what I've done and what I haven't done when you don't listen? Good news to them, they listen so they can use it as ammunition against you. Right? May

00:22:14 --> 00:22:16

Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us he's

00:22:17 --> 00:22:54

so the prophets of Allah Salam used to take time to say what he what he wanted to tell them things. I was saying that women narrate the stories The men don't, you can have heard a lovely lecture, but when you go back, the only thing you remember is you've got to be an obedient wife. That's what the mom said. obedient wife. That's the only thing on your tongues. And another thing is you've got to accept a second wife. It's a topic that people why do you want to start speaking about things that the only sooner you know on Earth, when you don't even have the time to correct your time? When you are upset and you control your temper with a normal average human being, you will be getting a great

00:22:54 --> 00:22:56

reward when law when it's your family you engender,

00:22:58 --> 00:23:35

you engender when it is your family you engine metal for those May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us blessings. So the prophets of Salaam used to dress up for who his family How many of you and I challenge you it's a Friday, we talking of the best husband the most, the most blessed of all creation, the highest in the rank of all, I tell you one thing we need to follow him Let's not just pay lip service to it. It's not just about lip service, my beloved brothers and sisters, dress up, you go home, take pride in your hair. Take pride in your clothing, what you look like what you smell like you come home, they should look at you and feel attracted. Come on. The prophet SAW Selim was

00:23:35 --> 00:23:59

intimate with his spouses. And he fulfilled that right of his spouses. How many of us a month passes? We haven't even been intimate with our holiday wife. She's busy waiting. She's dressing up. She's trying to affect us. I'm tired. You tired for what does he bother to happen at night? Some of us might be we put the hatchet but you can't come and complain that you cannot be intimate with your own spouse, you get a similar reward.

00:24:00 --> 00:24:08

And I'm not ashamed to speak about it. I've spoken about it several times, because men are guilty of thinking that women don't have sexual needs.

00:24:09 --> 00:24:21

This was the prophet SAW Selim. He tells the companions we call it a honeycomb saga. Remember when you're intimate with your wife, and you fulfill her needs, and you satisfy her? It is an act of charity. The Sahaba were

00:24:23 --> 00:24:37

rightly so they asked the question. Oh, wow, he's really a charity. He says Well, if you put it in haram would you get the sin? So they said yes, we will get us in? Well, if you put it in halaal in a proper way and you're conscious of the fulfilling of the rights, you definitely get a reward.

00:24:39 --> 00:25:00

That's the messenger that's the husband. So when you get home and you are intimate with your spouse, remember, even during the menstrual cycle, the prophets are seldom used to do everything besides * with his own spouse panela he and we cannot get into further details but the Prophet Solomon has explained this to a certain

00:25:00 --> 00:25:41

extent we stop at that extent, he says everything besides the act itself because you and I know that is prohibited during the menstrual cycle. But you can still do a lot of halala you can still do a lot, many people Oh, so you're on your cycle. Alright, see you after a week. What's going on? I'm being honest. That's a woman. It's not her fault. It's from Allah subhanho wa Taala. treat them with respect, that is a husband. That is what the professor Sallam told us. He instructed us he said it with his own mouth, his blessing lips, and we sit here saying I'm a good Muslim. sallallahu alayhi wasallam when you hear Muhammad sallallahu alayhi salam, everyone should be saying salatu salam. But

00:25:41 --> 00:26:00

that's not the only right. We say loudly, but our lives are far away from the same sallallahu alayhi wasallam. How you think that's the only right that the professor Salam has is that when you say his name, you must say Salaam Salaam that is extremely important. Yes, it is blessing. Yes, it is a must. Yes, you must not miss it. But that's only a part of it.

00:26:01 --> 00:26:22

Never your life, then you will understand that your life is a whole celebration. The whole life is a celebration because you come home, your wife is happy, you are happy, you are focused. The problem with us is we're focused on another woman somewhere outside. That's what it is. We're focused on another person outside Subhan Allah, Allah, may Allah protect all of us.

00:26:23 --> 00:26:41

Now when you come home, and it's halal, and it's a sadhaka, and it's a charity, and your wife has been waiting for you any time she's actually looking forward to it, she's protected herself as best as she can. And you know what, you just say, I'm tired, tired for what if there was a football match, you would have forgotten your tiredness, Allah forgive us.

00:26:43 --> 00:27:06

If there was a UFC match, you would have waited until three in the morning, but for your wife, to 11 also, you can't wait. then learn my brothers and sisters learn the true Sunnah of the Prophet Sal. And he was very open in his advice. We do not speak about it from the pulpit. And that's why I really salute those who came up with such a beautiful topic, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

00:27:07 --> 00:27:25

He was very, very kind. And he never forgot kindness. Even when his wife passed away. Khadija been to Hawaii, literally Allah and he used to be very kind to her friends. If we were kind to the Friends of a spouse, sometimes it would be for a contaminated intention. May Allah forgive us.

00:27:26 --> 00:27:37

Your wife might become suspicious in her life, if you're too kind to her friends, what's going on here? That's how bad we've become. But with the promise of Salaam it may not have been it wasn't a direct,

00:27:39 --> 00:27:50

continuous contact, but he used to send with some of his family members something to them at times in terms of a gift, etc. and say these were the Friends of a DJ.

00:27:53 --> 00:28:00

What a blessing for example, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam was just he was fair, fair. I always say to myself,

00:28:02 --> 00:28:39

those men who sided with their mothers against their wives or their wives against their mothers without looking at who was right and who was wrong. They have strayed from the Sunnah of the Prophet salon. He was just, it doesn't mean it's your mother. So she's right all the time. No, does it mean it's your wife so she is right all the time. You must listen, listen to what it is be fe and just get up and solve the problem. You are a man. Come on Subhanallah solve the matter in a respectful way. Beautiful way, address your mother with respect my mother, I love you. You gave birth to me. May Allah grant you Jelena. I've been taught to be kind to you to respect you. But you know, the way

00:28:39 --> 00:28:54

you treating my wife is unfortunately wrong. You ready to do that? beautiful way. Sometimes you might need to shift out to protect your wife from the harm of your own mother or your mother from the harm of your wife. Sometimes you they won't get along.

00:28:57 --> 00:29:29

It doesn't mean you just divorce someone because she didn't get along with your mother, not at all. And then the father comes and says divorce your wife because Ibrahim Alayhi Salam issued an instruction and you have to follow it. So now you better follow it and your father, if I don't like it, it's over. And I always say when he's not Ibrahim alayhi salam, that's the thing. is not a messenger of Allah. No father can instruct his son and think that His revelation from the heavens. Some of our fathers have marriages that have worked less than our own, and they want to instruct us. I always would like to say to parents of that nature, you couldn't even work your own marriage and

00:29:29 --> 00:29:54

you're interfering in your child's marriage. May Allah subhanahu wa taala grant us bliss and happiness. In a nutshell, that was the justice of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, let's go to a point of romance. The prophets of Salaam used to kiss his wife Subhana Allah He used to kiss them and the kisses are described. I don't have the time for because it's Juma. But if I could describe the kiss, I don't want to know what might happen to our Juma May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us ease.

00:29:56 --> 00:29:59

And the prophet SAW Selim used to eat and drink or drink

00:30:00 --> 00:30:06

The same spot that his wife drank from with us if she drank from a cup. I can't drink from that cup. Why?

00:30:08 --> 00:30:23

I don't know. might just get a cough. Something else might happen. So hon Allah. He used to find the same place she drank from and drink from it. Wow. This is mentioned by his own wife to say he was so romantic. He used to make us blush. Have you made your wife blush?

00:30:25 --> 00:30:28

You say yeah, she gets red very often she gets red with anger, not blushing.

00:30:30 --> 00:30:35

Now Allah forgive us, it's a reality. So this was the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam.

00:30:36 --> 00:30:56

You know, he used to lean on his spouse leaning, sometimes he would lean he would put his leg on, on her thigh, etc. And you know what it's described in the Hadith. Did you know that? Did you know that? So we will do it around the villa with someone out um, but halaal know is that's my wife, she should know. I love her.

00:30:58 --> 00:31:34

He would declare his love for his spouse. He said, Allah has blessed me with the love of Khadija. That's what he says. I love her. How many of you tell your wives I love you. Say it in the presence of your children no problem. They will learn how to treat their wives and their spouses when they grow older. The problem was us our children don't know how to live because we haven't lived in their presence. We've hidden The good thing sometimes. So the children don't know how to be with their spouses. If they see you sometimes joking, sometimes laughing sometimes sitting and talking, smiling, etc. They will know how to operate in life.

00:31:35 --> 00:32:16

The Prophet sallahu wa sallam took the time to play games with his spouses games. he would he would literally race with some of his spouses. Come let's race I run from here today. And let's see who wins to handle. It may not be racing in our case, but it could be still asuna but it could be any other game. I will I'm sure I'll take you out Subhanallah let's play this game with you. We don't have the time. Why are we too busy with all other things your spouse comes first? Family First remember that it's an Islamic idea or Lucha family first is an Islamic idea. Obviously this is after Allah and Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam that is worship now we talking of worshiping Allah following

00:32:16 --> 00:32:54

the Sunnah of the Prophet salon. But when it comes to relationships, your families definitely first if your family comes after your friends you have lost you are far from being a true Muslim for your family first and then your friends. Now what happens is at night the prophet SAW Selim taught us that if you don't have anything constructive to do after Salah delicia go to bed why wife is waiting for you. The problem with us will go to bed but still be on WhatsApp until two in the morning right? So Hannah law the wife tosses and turns this way and that way I hope it's not the other way around Mashallah. But tossing turning and you're not getting the message to Kerala. She's trying to touch

00:32:54 --> 00:33:25

you and you say, Wait, but where is the Islam in you? Your Islam should make you think why am I taught to come to bed here? For what? I'm supposed to go to bed because I have a spouse? Why did you get married if you don't want to spend the nights with your wife? For what? Sit with her talk to her play with her be intimate with her fulfill her right satisfy her go to bed get up for Salah tahajjud and don't be ashamed to have a shower even if the whole house knows what happened that night so what it was a lot

00:33:27 --> 00:33:52

it's a reality. It's an honor. It's an honor for someone to shower early in the morning and they are thinking to themselves I wonder what the whole room is gonna think but anyway, I followed Islam This was Islam not ashamed. Your children will grow up doing the same thing. But some of us are so ashamed with a switcher but I don't know Allah open your eyes for you. I'm gonna go for a shower Don't worry Allah will forgive me I just make it eight o'clock What? May Allah forgive us truly.

00:33:54 --> 00:34:03

Imagine I'm talking about it from a pulpit on the day of Juma because we are proud to acknowledge that is Islam. Allahu Akbar, it's my religion and yours.

00:34:05 --> 00:34:53

It's my religion in yours Subhana Allah. Let's go further. The prophets Allah seldom, at times he had his spouse comb his hair and so on. He played with their hair as well. So much of this romance and intimacy that is described for us it's actually sad how far we've become the only sooner that the men actually talk about a lot of them talk about is is don't pretend like you don't know guys, so can Allah. second wife which asuna Wow, second is asuna Watson start off with these things correct? It is I'm not denying it, but I'm saying you haven't even lived as a husband yet. And you want to start being a husband for more. You've missed up one's life. You're gonna mess up all the

00:34:53 --> 00:34:59

others lives. May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us a deep understanding. So the process allow us to laugh with him. He used to

00:35:00 --> 00:35:05

Extended help in the home to his spouses. He actually

00:35:08 --> 00:35:52

the prophets, Allah Salam used to praise His family members, his wives used to praise them, especially with others. He has spoken about Sharia law. You know what he says? He says, the virtue of Ayesha over that of all other women is like ferried over the rest of the food now 30 It was a beautiful dish, it's a dish of gentleness. And at the same time, it's something that is loved, you know, so he says she is better than all the other women she's a virtue is very, very high. Would you ever say that about your wife, my wife is tops, just that tops is enough. So behind Allah, a man thinks sometimes that is going to be considered small when he praises his wife, say the truth. You

00:35:52 --> 00:36:28

don't have to talk about the negatives behind the backs. You're not supposed to talk about negatives regarding normal human beings, with your family members, you are supposed to cover them, you are supposed to protect them, you are supposed to be a Libous a clothing for them. When I wear clothing, the guests that I may have due to an operation that I might have had when I was a kid is covered. You can't see it. The same applies when you are a clothing to your spouse. You don't have to go and tell them all the bad you say the good thing Subhanallah that's my wife, what are you talking about? She's a lovely lady, Mashallah, I really respect her. I really acknowledge she sacrifices so much

00:36:28 --> 00:36:34

for me for the children, but you know, we are weak. Sometimes we don't know how to reciprocate it. May Allah make it easy for us.

00:36:35 --> 00:36:37

So this is the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

00:36:39 --> 00:37:18

And then the Prophet Salam used to be happy when they used to get their friends over. Wow, this is a tough one, right? Why her friends come over. And what happens the process allow us to actually make way for them they used to be shy with us friends are coming. What's happening? How can your friends be here? Am I not here? Once in a while you need to have the friends over. Yes, I do agree. If they they every day all day SubhanAllah. It will create a bit of a disaster. But we're talking about once in a while the prophets of Salaam used to be happy. allow her to make sure that her friends as well, for as long as they are reasonable company, sometimes good company, but if it's bad company evil,

00:37:18 --> 00:37:23

then perhaps you want to address the matter with respect. Don't yell Don't scream.

00:37:25 --> 00:37:33

The prophets of Allah alayhi wa sallam, when he used to look at his wives, the eyes that he used to look with us to make him blush.

00:37:35 --> 00:37:46

Subhan Allah, the way he used to look at them, I can just imagine, I can only imagine because obviously he was a far higher example. Imagine a woman like Asian or the one

00:37:47 --> 00:37:53

blushing. And the professor said, I'm just looking at her. Look, that was please go home and try it.

00:37:54 --> 00:38:06

Please go home and try it. Some of us we've never done it. So when you look first time she might say Stop looking at me like a devil. May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us forgiveness. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

00:38:10 --> 00:38:13

He actually was the best husband. He says, What?

00:38:15 --> 00:38:30

And I am the best from amongst all of you to my family. I'm the best from amongst all of you to my family. Do you know what else the professor solemn has done? He used to feed his wife with his own hand. At times, become commercial acid and feeding you.

00:38:31 --> 00:38:56

We wouldn't even do it if our wife was sick. We say Hang on. I'll bring a maid. I'll get some servants they can do it for you. That's what some men will do. This is healthy no problem. But you want to feed her why my hand in a romantic way. You don't go home and say right come here today. I'm gonna feed you come Come here. That's not how it works. It's romance. It has to be built up to that automatically it comes to that you don't demand

00:38:57 --> 00:39:11

to be romantic. You've got to get it because it's reciprocated automatically. You smile at someone they smile back at you you wink at someone you may get two weeks back What else? I hope it's the right person. May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us goodness and ease.

00:39:13 --> 00:39:50

Then whenever they wanted something he used to get it for them. He used to get it for them. And obviously they will not extravagant way they wouldn't dare ask right? You heard. I need the Mercedes. I need this. I need a new kitchen. I need a new bathroom and toilet. I need everything new. You heard what the professor said I'm used to do when his wife used to say he used to get it for them. That's not it's not that bad Come on. But those simple things they lived in a very simple environment. The profits are seldom used to help them he used to get for them. He used to get for them what they used to want, do the errands and the chores with us. A lot of the times the wives are

00:39:50 --> 00:40:00

doing it themselves once in a while. I know you're at work once in a while so don't worry, I'll get the shopping list. May Allah subhanho wa Taala help us. He used to he used to want to know about

00:40:00 --> 00:40:11

His wife sallallahu alayhi wa sallam with us a day passes a week passes we haven't if we're not at home, we haven't even found to find out how they're doing. May Allah subhanho wa Taala forgive us.

00:40:12 --> 00:40:27

So these are some of the beautiful points that we have made mentioned of, of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam being the best of husbands. Do you know that I haven't even covered half of what I had planned to say.

00:40:28 --> 00:40:51

But I think if we start off with this, we will have the best of homes and I'd like to think that Allah subhanho wa Taala will bless us in every way and just noticing the time I've overshot by about 10 minutes, but it's okay. I'm sure the wives will forgive us and if they have forgiven us in Sharla, it's okay 10 minutes more, it's a blessing of Allah Subhana Allah to Allah, May Allah forgive us all. Aku kolyada sallallahu wasallam ah Baraka la Vina Mahatma

Jumuah 23 November 2018
Masjidul Quds

Share Page

Related Episodes