Plays ‘The Game’ with Freshly Grounded

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The speakers discuss the importance of forgiveness and setting boundaries in settings, emphasizing the need for leadership qualities and prioritizing one's actions. They stress the importance of forgiveness and setting boundaries in settings, and suggest that it is better choice than letting things happen for long periods of time. The speakers emphasize the need for people to respect others and set boundaries in settings to avoid harm and short-term consequences. They also emphasize the importance of flexibility in learning and finding a balance between work and life, emphasizing the need for flexibility in scheduling and remote learning.

Transcript ©

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AsSalamu Alaikum and welcome to this week's special episode of freshly grounded. This episode was short over the course of a week, as a lot of you will know, we just came back from the Light upon light tour for which Mufti Mink was the kind of main keynote speaker. And on that tour in each of the cities, we were able to do a live episode of freshly grounded for the audience, we now have that footage for you today, and you guys are going to absolutely love it, you'll have to forgive some of the audio issues because obviously with each of the events, there's kind of a different audio system and different atmosphere and different surround, different surround. That's not even a thing,

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different, you know, sound stuff, and, and we've kind of what we try to do is kind of integrate the different

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events all into kind of one video and weave in the episode. So rather than just playing like six different videos, we try to weave them all in. So it's really interesting. If the bank gets personal, we ask them a lot personal questions it's really interesting in For from Him, He has a lot of advice for the general people, which we also go into. But the whole episode or throughout the whole episode, we played the game. So a lot of you will know that the game is our kind of flagship product here at freshly guarded, and it's a game or a box of 100 conversation cards, you get an example of the type of questions that we have in this game, through this episode. But really, we

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created it because we've been so blessed to have conversations with so many amazing people just like nifty bank, and had hours and hours of conversation. And we want you to now hand that conversation over to you allow you to have beautiful conversations with loved ones, with friends with families, perhaps even with strangers to break the ice. And on that topic, we've now just released our first ever piece of merch that is directly linked to the game. So we've taken a quote from The Game One of the questions from the game, and we put it on a t shirt, and I'm wearing that for you now. I mean, I'm not rooting for you. I'm writing for me, but I'm wearing it right now. And this if you can't see

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on camera, it says what's your favorite struggle? And that's one of the questions in the game. And it's something that provokes thought, right? Like you're walking down the street, someone would probably look at you and say, What does that even mean? And when I and that's actually one of the questions we asked me if you make in this episode. And when people ask me that question, I often say fatherhood, right? Because fatherhood is not easy. There's some struggle with it. But it's my favorite thing in the world. And so that's my favorite struggle. And I'm sure there's loads of things that come to mind when when you think of that question. And so I think it's a great

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icebreaker. Not only that, but the shirt genuinely

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is probably the best quality t shirt we've ever released. And I say that confidently, is probably the best credit teacher. And we spared no expense even with the the code itself is not printed on it stitched on his embroided. And so the quality of it is just phenomenal. I really do think that so do check that out, you can buy both the game and T shirt at shop dot freshly Also, if you like this kind of event, we are going to we are doing a fresh recorded live tour. And so it's a live event in Birmingham, Manchester and London in the UK, where you will be able to experience freshly grounded live and in person. We're going to have keynote talks, we're going to have fun and games

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we're gonna have audience interaction, and there's gonna be lots of chance to win prizes. And

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I know we're gonna have opportunities to give charity and just load the conversation. It's gonna be nice, intimate live setting, and Birmingham is a fast one. There's only

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about 150 seats remaining in Birmingham or just less than that. That's on February the fifth. So do grab your tickets for Birmingham, Manchester and London you can get them all by going to freshly forward slash tour. And finally before we get into this episode, this episode was a partnership with EMI Academy. So the tour the media partners for the label network was demand channel. And the education partners are one of the education partners were Eman Academy and Eman Academy provide people who are perhaps like you and I, who work and who are very busy with the ability to learn fundamental view religion for just five pounds a month and 500 months is a special

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offer that they're doing for this tour. And for this episode, which you can grab via the link in the description. So do check that out. And without any further ado,

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enjoy this episode this special episode episode 264 of freshly grounded with Mufti mink enjoy and welcome to a freshly grounded the brand new podcast not exactly brand new anymore Is it?

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What welcome to freshly grounded, the

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pod costs

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created by Best Friends freeze when Sam

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Walker I said welcome to freshly ground

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Did I have that bit created by a bit? Best Friends phase one sad really? I'd like you to please brothers and sisters welcome on stage for a live episode of freshly grounded Mufti Menk.

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Salam Alaikum, Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

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over to Kathy said, How are you doing? Alhamdulillah? Very, very well by the will of Allah. So how was your How was your travels? Are you keeping? What did you make to get here? Okay. Well, the troubles have been really tough because I've been away from home for approximately six weeks, because when they announced that Southern Africa was going to be cut off from the rest of the world, I was away, and I decided not to go back because I needed to come and see you guys. So I and then a few weeks later, they said, Well, now it's okay. And they can come. But too late, I was already away for so long. So we'll handle all in the good cause and Sharla Hamdulillah. Lordship we'll get

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straight into it inshallah. So this game, as you know, some of the questions you played before can get quite personal. Or this, or a bit deeper. I think I've done two thirds of those questions. No, no, you haven't. You're sure. How many do you have in a pack? 100? Oh, no, no, I have. I've only answered about 10. Yeah, so far. Don't worry. There's plenty more check. So let's see. Oh, as always, the first question is quite personal. Secret, ALLAH forgive you, my brother. These personal questions. Give me away, man.

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Okay, so this question of how do you talk about something similar? Before the question says, Tell me something about your father, that you didn't appreciate until you became older.

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It is the same thing that I appreciated when I became older.

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The whip.

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I was beaten blue and green SubhanAllah. When I was young, I recall we had this, Oh, I loved my father. And I still love him to pieces. He's a role model. He's taught me a lot of what I knew very early on, I became a half of with him. And he dedicated a lot of time to us, even though we're nine siblings. But at that particular time, corporal punishment was something that was never discussed. No one ever laid limits to it. So when I was young, in in 1800s, what happened is,

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that was the way things were done. I mean, you guys are laughing are some of you are dinosaurs just like I am. Shala

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I mean, 1900 Sorry.

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So I think that is one thing that I didn't appreciate. And later on, I felt and I still do feel that what molded me to what I am today is the discipline although nowadays,

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the methods of discipline of fine tuned in mashallah, they're much more advanced. And I personally would not like anyone to be beaten as such, but at the same time, perhaps discipline by taking the phone away. It hurts much more than a whip. I think some of the kids will say, just with me, but get my phone back, you know? That's what they would do. Perhaps Am I right?

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Look, they all saying Yeah, ha say that to the authorities. They'll say no, may Allah forgive us. Okay. Okay, let's go to the next question. Next question. It says, one of our last names

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it kind of translates to the provider result. What are you thankful for that money can't buy?

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Contentment, happiness. What else?

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Yeah, contentment. That's one thing that's a feeling and that Allah gives you based on

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how well you rely on Allah and trust him completely for everything, no matter what happens in your life. It's something

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that has to be positive as negative as it may seem, something will come out of it at some point. And I'm one of those who's convinced in that way.

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As I might have had a very, very challenging moment, but I'm smiling and I'm totally reassured within my heart that this was a good thing. It's okay.

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What does a perfect night in look like to you?

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A night in meaning at home? Yeah, Mufti makes relaxing? Well, those are most of my nights, to be honest with you.

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I think I'm very, very connected to my children because when I'm traveling, I communicate with them via the phone. And so when I'm at home, I like to see them I like to have a meal. I like to get them up one by one. I'd like the little ones. I like to talk to them, the elder ones, the older ones. I'd speak to them but obviously I wouldn't demand that they come but Alhamdulillah and I'd like to have a meal or at least some tea in the evening or towards the night

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and to be able to talk about the day and to be able to talk

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About a few important things and laugh a little bit, and perhaps, share a few things here what happened, it didn't. And then, yeah, pray together, perhaps and then get ready to go to bed. And before you go to bed, you look at your phone, and you see the final set of messages and respond a few of them, and Bismillah, do some other car and fall off to sleep. Some of the as you know, this conference is about social media. And you mentioned when you're home to kind of put the phone away and to be present. And that's something that I think a lot of people speak about nowadays, when you're home, putting the phone away, how important do you think it is, generally, for us to make

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sure that we are spending real time with the family, when we are putting the phone away, I'm guilty of not doing it, as I preach it, perhaps. And I'm, I'm guilty in the sense that I need to improve, I'm not that bad. But I think I could do better. It's just that 1000s of people demand your time. And in my case, a lot of them are very, very important. And you can only respond to two or three or four at times. And so putting your phone away to me definitely means that you will be able to spend better quality time with the rest of your family on condition that they all do the same. Because it's pointless for me to put my phone away, and then everyone else is still on their phones, what

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will I do pick it up, you know? So, yes, it's really important, I think to to be disciplined in that regard. And that's why we're talking about social media, because it has a good side to it. And it has a very, very challenging side to it. If you're not disciplined enough that you could get carried away, and you would never see happiness in your life, because happiness is connected to the real people in your presence rather than those out there who may be real in their own world, but they're not necessarily in your physical world. And that's just temporary at times, and it's sometimes even fake. So it's important to set limits everything. You could, perhaps exceed those limits by a few

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minutes, 1015 minutes, maybe 20 Depending on how important the last thing you're doing is, but not more than that. It says one of Allah's names,

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translates slightly to the subtle Latif

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Do you remember a time in your life? That kind of was subtly shaped?

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Something that reminded you of that name? Or can you give us some advice around the name and leave, you know, when I went through and I go through often the names of Allah subhanho wa taala, just to ponder over them. And Allah is something that comes up so often because every fine detail of your life, planned by Allah known by Allah, and he is in control of it,

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even though he permits you and allows you to let things happen sometimes according to your choice, because that's the sophistication of the creation of Allah subhanho wa taala. On one hand, he knows what's going to happen the other hand, he gives you the ability to do things within a certain capacity, you can I mean, if I want to, for example, jump up to this ring at the top that the lights are on, for example,

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as a human, with the capacity I have, I already know I can't do that, right. But whatever Allah has given me the capacity to do like to knock this thing down right now. If I were to get up and start kicking it, me, I would be able to do it. But I'm not going to do it because I'm not a fool. But at the same time, it's an ALLAH given capacity. And I need to use it in the correct way. So because I'm going to sit here and just allow it to be in front of me. Allah already knew that. and Allah knew every detail, Allah knew that I was going to make it here today. He knew that we were all going to make it here today. But did he force us to do this today? The answer is no, he gave us the choice.

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And we used it. But he knew that we were going to use our choice in a specific way. So Allah Almighty knows every detail, for example, the shoe that you have underneath it, the dust particles that are there, the Almighty knows exactly what they have. Let me give you one beautiful example, that of the virus. If you have the virus, you don't know you can have a lateral flow test 10 times in it might just show negative and you still could have been positive who knows? But Allah knows, right? Allah knows and he is in control and then you might have medication is it benefiting or not? Who knows? Allah knows. Sometimes the tests don't show but Allah knows. So that is Allah intricacy

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you know the the slightest the smallest of detail is planned by Allah in the control of Allah and we just in

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All of Allah subhanho wa Taala you watch the little ant, as it moves and you think to yourself, when Allah says, Why mommy

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birding, Phil only in

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here is going, why? Lama Mustafa on her I was

00:15:23--> 00:15:25

feeling kita been

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moving, nothing that moves on Earth,

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except that Allah has made it, a duty upon himself to provide for it.

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And Allah is the One who gave it its life, and who shall take that life away? Who provides for it, who takes away from it and so on? That is Allah Almighty, nothing that moves, except that it is provided for by Allah. So the smallest organism that you see, Allah created it, Allah knows about it, and Allah provides for it. Now I always give an example to those who are complaining that you know, I don't have a job, etc, etc. Yes, keep on calling out to Allah. Correct. But remember, if Allah provided for the ants and the flies and the mosquitoes, we are far bigger than those he's going to provide for us. He will. He shall. He did. And he's always given us May Allah grant us

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goodness, I mean,

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finish the sentence. I love who I am when I am with.

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That's a tough one.

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Is it supposed to be like a person because I'm going to let the cat out of the bag. It's up to you.

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My family Hamdulillah I think my family is by far the most important people.

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In terms of those whom I'd like to be with. I mean, don't get me wrong. I love being in Luton as well.

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But I think family people don't realize the importance of it. And you know, when people become wealthy, famous, perhaps lots of knowledge, perhaps you gain a lot, maybe popular whatever it may be.

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I think what we don't realize is the closest circle is the most important one come what may come what may I have a very small circle of friends and I've made it smaller and smaller as the years pass. I have acquaintances I know a lot of people but I wouldn't let them into my closed circle. I think that's my immediate family. And come what may? Even if there is a little squabble between a few of the family members, it will be sorted out within five or 10 minutes, not late, not long, not more.

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Just for opening up for us.

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Check this next question. I'm going to spin it a bit. The question reads, do you need to forgive yourself more easily but what how I want to spin it is I want to say to you that I believe it may have been yesterday in yesterday's conference, you were speaking about istikhara and Toba. And one of the things that was being mentioned was about once making Toba. You know, accepting that you've been forgiven. Okay, moving on from that, right. So

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a general advice to us about forgiving ourselves too.

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I think one of the plots of shaitaan, which is not known by a lot of people is that he makes you doubt the fact that you are forgiven by Allah, once you seek forgiveness. Shaitan is very upset because he did not want you to seek forgiveness. So the minute you seek that forgiveness, and you say, Oh Allah, forgive me shaitan becomes upset, but he hasn't lost hope in deviating you. So what he does is he comes back to you after you seek forgiveness, and starts making you doubt that you are actually forgiven. So you start thinking, You know what, I'm not forgiven, I don't think so. And so on. And this is where what you've just said, comes into play. You need to learn to forgive yourself.

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And you need to learn to understand you're a human one thing that gives me a lot of comfort. And I'm not saying this because I want to encourage people to send now to Biller, that's wrong. But I want to say this because we're living in an environment where sin is prevalent. And it's very difficult at times because of the pressures of society, community and the environment. So people fall and falter and then they think that they're bad, so they become worse, because they think there's no hope for them and so on. But what happens and what we need to know is, Allah Almighty is most forgiving. He created Adam Alayhis Salam.

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And it's the thing I think of a lot.

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He told Adam Alayhis Salam with Hawa or Eve May peace be upon them both. He said

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you can do whatever you like in this little garden. It was called a Jana right? Where they were was a place called Jana. Not exactly the Jana, we're going to be

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Returning to when we go, it's not genital hold that we are going to be going back to. But it's Jenna. It's apparent it's a type of a garden that was specially made for that purpose. And Allah says to them both that do whatever you want, but don't touch, don't come close to the street, don't eat from the fruit of this tree. That was the only instruction that Allah gave Adam and Eve May peace be upon them both. The only instruction was don't eat from this tree. What did they do?

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What did they do?

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They ate from exactly the tree.

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See? So what did Allah do?

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When Allah received their statement of seeking forgiveness, Rob BANA vollen

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fu Sana, our inland Delphina water Rihanna, Lana akuna

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minal cause hearing, oh, our Lord, we have wronged ourselves. And if you don't forgive us, and if you don't have mercy on us, we are going to be the losers. And so Allah Almighty forgave them.

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So if Allah Almighty forgave them for doing something that he clearly instructed them not to do, they knew shaytan. So they did not doubt that they were forgiven, they knew they were forgiven, because Allah forgave them with us, unfortunately, shaitaan comes back to us, and makes us think you're not forgiven. And so we plunge deeper and deeper into other sins. And then shaytan is excited. So don't allow that to happen. Something happens, improve, pat yourself on the back, feel good about the fact that you've turned back to Allah, if you happen to falter again, in a similar way, turn back to Allah. And that should repeat itself again and again, until the day you die. May

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Allah Almighty grant us a death in a way that we were, or we are, or we will be the best possible version of ourselves the closest to Allah at that particular time. I mean, I mean, he says, What do you know about yourself now that you didn't know when you were younger?

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Sorry to repeat it, what do I know about myself now that I didn't know when I was younger? Yeah, almost everything.

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I mean, subhanAllah, almost everything, you know,

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I learned a lot. Actually, to be very fair, what I learned now that I didn't know when I was a little bit younger was to respect people who differ with me, oh, that's something I really learned. And, and to honor them and to to, to offer them that, you know, the greeting and the smile and to be able to take them in as someone who's also a human being who perhaps is following a different opinion, depending on what exactly it is, right?

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You have those who are totally out of what is acceptable, still, you should offer them a little bit of respect, in the sense that don't you want the truth that you have to be heard by them, they will never be able to hear it if you didn't offer them a minimum respect, you know. And so I've, I've learned that because when I was younger,

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we were trained, should I say, to just look at people who differ from you and go the other way. And that's it. The term used was ALLAH Walla Walla Bara. And that's it, you know, and I felt that something was amiss. And then I learned that the interpretation of it differs from, from Chef to Chef. And then a lot of them haven't ever lived in the West. And they haven't interacted with people who might not be Muslim, or people who may be Muslims from a different background, who perhaps grow up or grew up believing that they were always right. And maybe they, they may have an opinion that you might not have even learned or thought about or even considered, or they may be wrong.

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Nonetheless, still, you got to offer the guys respect. That's what I learned. That's probably one of the biggest things I've learned over time. So it doesn't mean everyone that I get along with Do I agree with that's who I am. Now, the next question says, it's a personal one again, how do you deal with pressure?

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SubhanAllah? That's a beautiful question. Sometimes I don't like to talk to people. When I'm under pressure, I like to get things done. I can give you a good example. When I'm done with my event. I need a moment of silence because I need to just process what has happened. I need to unwind a little bit and that's the reason why going to an event and coming back from event. When you're going to the event there is a different type of pressure. When you're leaving, there is a different type of perhaps not pressure but a feeling you know you need to you need to sort of cool down a little bit you need to process what has happened and you need to have the

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Moment of silence, I mean, I will be speaking for half an hour, 45 minutes an hour concentrating while you're talking, you need to have concentration, you need to watch the faces, you need to see the reactions. And you need to be quick enough to be able to react to something that's just happened in front of you at that time. And so I go alone, if you notice, I drive myself, I drive myself back, I don't like someone with me, because I don't want to talk again to someone else, it's going to take away my concentration. And a lot of the times in my life pressure has to do with getting things done.

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And so one thing with pressure is as much as I don't like to talk to people, I can get things done under pressure. If you tell me, you've got to be here at five, or the flight is at five, I'm one of the only guys who there is an hour left and I'm still just leaving home. I'm talking of back in back home in Zimbabwe, not here the airport is so far here. Back at home, the airport is 1015 minutes away. So I've already contacted the guys, I'm probably already checked in, everything is ready. I just got to walk straight through and what do I do? Last minute I'm packing. And there are others who pack two days in advance.

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Maybe a day in advance, and everything is ready waiting with me. It is like that if I'm traveling with the family, but when I'm alone, it's a last minute thing. And it's not like I'm delayed. No, I left it for that time because I know I can do a better job under pressure than I would if I did it much earlier. May Allah forgive us.

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The next card, it says, What's your favorite struggle?

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That's a tough one. What's your favorite struggle?

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What's your favorite struggle is when people often ask me I say like fatherhood because it's not always easy, but it's so rewarding. I'm so grateful for it. Okay, I can think of something, I can think of something because I'm in Leicester, I probably know 1000 Guys in Leicester, maybe the number of calls and messages I got even while I was coming here from people close to my heart. So many each one wants me to have a cup of tea each one wants one minute of my time. One minute by 1000 is how many hours. Each one says I just need 30 seconds of your time. I just need 20 to maneuver and navigate through that giving importance to every individual, making them feel that they are very

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important to you is my biggest struggle. That's a fact of life ever since obviously, I work very hard if those who know me, right? And it's so difficult because I've just come in and I'm leaving as soon as I'm done with whatever I am I'm out, you know that we're in the midst of a pandemic insha Allah that's about to leave us by the will of Allah. I mean, and I can tell you that it's so difficult because how many I can name you at least 200 people that I know in your city, and I know them quite well you know that I'm from Africa, tell me how many of you are originally Africans perhaps so many mashallah, right? Or you have family and not only that, but how many are close to

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me, you know me perhaps from somewhere, it's very difficult, very difficult, and especially when people feel bad, they think you've become arrogant, they think you've changed. They think now that you're popular, you're you know, you're an idiot and so on. You know what, take it in your Australian you give them the importance you can explain to them if they don't understand it, make dua for them, talk to Allah about them. Explain to Allah what has happened and tell Allah to calm them and to cool their hearts and minds and to give them goodness and inshallah that's okay, I feel good about it. If I pray for someone who's been ugly to me, I feel very good about it. So that's a

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struggle brother Faisal. Give me one principle that changed your life that I could implement or that we could implement.

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I said it earlier trust Allah for everything no matter what. You lose you trust Allah you when you trust Allah, you gain your trust Allah mute, you have a problem you trust Allah, things are not going your way you thank him even more, and you talk to him. That's a very good habit to talk to Allah. When I if the best gift you could ever give me is to talk to Allah about me. And what that means is you speak to Allah you know this guy for example, he's he's helped me in this way that way, knowingly unknowingly help him as well. You know, his issues, you know, whatever I may not know. Give him peace give him goodness give him Jana forgive his shortcoming. strengthen him protecting

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from harm. I do this about others. I do it about communities. Speak to Allah about gluten.

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And tell him and Allah knows it more than you do. But it's good for you to like, you know, cry to him. Tell him he knows but he wants to hear it from you as well. It's like your DUA Allah already knows it, but you making it he knows it. And when he likes it when you cry, you know when you have a big contact and you say listen guy, you know, this guy here is struggling. Please help him you know, and you know, he's a

00:30:00--> 00:30:19

big guy, he's a contact. That's a small example. Allah's example is far higher than that Allah is the Lord of the Worlds, but in a much more respectful way you can do something similar. Allahu Allah. Okay, what's next on the next one? It says one of our last names translates to your protecting friend or family.

00:30:21--> 00:30:36

Can you think of a time in your life where you felt that name, kind of in existence? Subhanallah, you know, when you were saying one of the names of Allah, a lot of names were going through my mind just now. And then when you said, Willie,

00:30:37--> 00:31:27

indeed, a lot of the times when we have when we sense a little bit of fear, should I say, maybe some anxiety as human beings, they might be things that have happened they have in my life in the past, it was a little bit more, right now it's a bit less, but definitely you rely on Allah and you trust Allah and you know that he has your back because you fulfill Salah five times a day, you are trying to earn the pleasure of Allah, you are trying to be a good person, you might have faulted a little bit, not because you're evil, but because you're weak. There's a very big difference between the two when I do something wrong. Number one, it's not something majorly wrong. And number two is, even if

00:31:27--> 00:31:47

it is it's because I'm a human being and I'm weak and I've faulted not because I'm defying Allah, not because I'm an evil person, I'm not an evil person. So to trust Allah that He will protect you, he will look after you. He is the one who has your back. This has happened a lot of times, you know, I've actually

00:31:48--> 00:31:49

had a

00:31:51--> 00:31:54

an incident where I was trying to cross a border.

00:31:56--> 00:32:16

And I was told, listen, you need a visa. But we didn't need a visa the previous week when we crossed it the other way. And they said no, the legislation has changed. And I was thinking there's no way I'm here with my family. And I really need this to happen. Allah created a miracle. About an hour and a half later.

00:32:18--> 00:32:23

I don't know if you want to hear the story. But you some of you might have heard it. I have mentioned it before, I think

00:32:24--> 00:32:46

an hour and a half later, miraculously, I was asked to cross It's okay. You can go fine. He has a stamp your passport and you can carry on. So that's Allah and Willie, the protector, he looks after you, he takes care of you. He makes sure that you're okay he will and therefore, you don't need all that anxiety.

00:32:47--> 00:32:53

You know beyond a certain point is very, very unhealthy. So you develop your conviction as well in Allah.

00:32:54--> 00:33:02

snuff no handshake. So the next question he says, When I think of meeting Allah, I feel blank, excited.

00:33:04--> 00:33:09

I don't know what others feel. When I think of meeting with Allah, I feel excited. I can tell you why.

00:33:11--> 00:33:48

I'm not a saint. I've done a lot of wrong things. Like I've said, not majorly wrong. Insha Allah, I seek forgiveness every day I ask Allah to forgive me things. I know things. I don't know, people. I may have heard, unintentionally, a few you might have heard intentionally. I was speaking to someone on the phone a few moments ago and I saying you know, I don't think I've heard people unless they've asked me to do something wrong, and then I was unable to do it and they felt hurt as a result of that, then maybe they're hurt, but reasonably, I wouldn't intentionally hurt someone. So I try to fulfill my salah, do whatever I can help people be as genuine as possible.

00:33:49--> 00:34:29

Try and be the best version of myself trying to follow whatever I can of the Sunnah, etc. I am weak. We're not up there. But I know my Lord is Most Merciful, most forgiving, most kind, most beautiful, most amazing, most Beneficent, and so on. I'm excited to meet him. I know I've been trying all along. Come on. If I'm excited to see you guys here in Birmingham, what about the one who made you shouldn't be more excited to see him? You know, people say I'm frightened. Don't be frightened. Are you trying? Are you a good guy? Do you think you're reasonably decent? Do you think you have something to present to Allah? Oh Allah, this is what I did because I knew one day I'm going to meet

00:34:29--> 00:34:59

you. So I did this this this this this I hope you accepted it from me I hope you liked it. You know when you when you when you make a cake for someone, and you present it to them and you say I hope you like it. And you wishing and hoping that they liked it because it's one of the latest or whatever it may be. with Allah. It's very different but we have deeds we've done all of us have done good deeds, haven't we? At some point in our lives we have good deeds in sha Allah for as long as you haven't harmed another human being one day you will see those deeds and they will be multi

00:35:00--> 00:35:07

Fly by 10. And at the same time you present them to Allah because that's what you've come with. Yeah, are you letting?

00:35:11--> 00:35:36

Go Natsume God dammit, God, are you who believe be conscious of Allah, develop the correct relationship with Allah and each one of you should look into what you prepared for tomorrow to hand in to Allah. So I'm excited. Usually when I think of the day I'm going to pass away, none of us want to die right now. But whenever Allah has chosen, May Allah take us away when he knows it's best for us to go.

00:35:38--> 00:35:50

May he take us away? doing good deeds, not bad deeds, may he take us away, having forgiven us in a way that we will go straight into genital for those, we ask Allah that, and therefore we keep on doing good deeds. And

00:35:51--> 00:36:04

you know, when you die, imagine you're going to meet the one who created the beauty of the earth that is not allowed to go into paradise. Imagine what Paradise will look like. And if he created paradise, imagine what he will look like.

00:36:06--> 00:36:43

And when you think about all of this, you should be excited to meet with Allah. May Allah grant us genital feathers. I mean, just check. I'm conscious of time because I want to talk to you a bit about a man Academy. So the next two questions I'm going to combine because they're kind of they're fairly similar. So the first one, he says, What is the biggest small thing that you could do today? But then the next question says, what steps could you take today to get closer to Allah? So I'm going to combine them and I say, general advice for all of us here. What small steps could we take today, to get closer to Allah. Point number one, always bear in mind, in your heart that I'm a

00:36:43--> 00:37:20

Muslim, just bear in mind, bear that in mind. No matter what you're doing, who you meet, you interact with, just bear in mind, I'm a Muslim, that would mean I have responsibilities, I have duties, I need to be upright, I need to convey this message of Islam without actually conveying it by mouth to begin with. What that means is someone just sees you, they must be so delighted by just looking at you and the way you carry yourself that they're already attracted to something that they may not understand initially, what exactly it is. And the moment they interact with you a little bit more, they would figure out that's your faith that has driven you to be so calm, so collected, so

00:37:20--> 00:38:01

beautiful, so kind, so loving, smiling all the time, or happy should I say because that's part of the deen of Allah. So as much as these are small things, this is something all of us can do. Bear in mind, you're a Muslim, there's so much that that holds. And this is why the next thing that I want to talk about which is also connected to a small thing that you could do to make a big change. constantly seek the forgiveness of Allah bearing in mind that Allah is Most forgiving. We all make mistakes, we all sin, we sometimes we know sometimes we don't seek the forgiveness of Allah, and feel that you're forgiven, feel that you're forgiven. The two come hand in hand, because shaitaan

00:38:01--> 00:38:06

doesn't want you to seek forgiveness. And as soon as you do, he doesn't want you to feel forgiven.

00:38:07--> 00:38:45

That's a very, very important point. Many of us we seek forgiveness from a major sin. And then we feel like no, I'm not forgiven. Maybe it was a bit too big or maybe was it that easy to actually be forgiven? To be honest with you? Yes, it was. And yes, it is. And yes, it shall be right up to the end. I am always smiling at the story of Adam Alayhis Salam that Allah has repeated in the Quran, where he was told not to do one thing only and that's the exact thing they went to do. I mean, come on, I feel that if I was told not to do things, I doubt I would do all those things that I was told not to do. I might fall here and there but not that badly. In sha Allah. However, why did that

00:38:45--> 00:38:57

happen? The wisdom of Allah was to teach us that listen, if you are to falter, you've got to pray back in the same way seeking forgiveness that Adam Alayhis Salam did. What were the words they said?

00:38:58--> 00:38:59

Rob bana vollum

00:39:00--> 00:39:27

fusina Ilam Delphine Lana what Ohana Lana Coonan Amina hos Jeannine O our Lord, we have wronged ourselves. If you don't forgive us and have mercy on us, we will be from among the losers. So forgive us and have mercy on us. Those were the words of Adam alayhis salaam, Allah says, We forgave him if you say the same words, with a genuine feeling, you're forgiven. So that's something very important. As small as it might sound, it's a huge thing.

00:39:29--> 00:39:33

The next question he reads tell me something about one of your grandparents

00:39:41--> 00:39:50

I've only seen three of my grandparents so my mom's mom and dad. I've seen them. And my dad's dead. I've seen him.

00:39:51--> 00:39:57

He was he always read Quran as far as I know. In fact, all of them were very, very

00:39:58--> 00:39:59

pious according to what

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We knew as children, they would be connected with the Quran. They were always interested in the deen. And that that was a big thing. I just remember that my grandfather was about 86. And he, he could be he couldn't hear well, and he couldn't see well, at that age. So he used to use a Quran with massive letters, you know, but he still used to read loudly because when you can't hear well, sometimes you end up

00:40:27--> 00:40:41

yelling, screaming or say saying things much louder. Nowadays, you have devices that you can use in your ears. But Subhanallah I think one thing that impressed me as well was, even though he had a walking stick, he still walked to the masjid.

00:40:42--> 00:40:51

And with us, we have no walking stick, we have no problem with our knees or anything. And we wouldn't even walk towards the masjid at times, and it's right around the corner.

00:40:52--> 00:41:05

That's, that's a big one. We are healthy. We are fit. We have advanced technology. We have cars, we have facilities, we have heaters, we have jackets, and we still don't do the basic things they did without all of that.

00:41:07--> 00:41:08

She's a researcher.

00:41:09--> 00:41:49

Okay, so this next one is another one unless being I want to ask your advice for all of us. So the question the card it reads, do you need to outgrow your environment? And I want to ask you about outgrowing your environment? How often should we reflect on who we have around us? And if we should kind of outgrow it. I think one of the important factors is when outgrowing the environment because of negativity that's in it or because it's on a level that you are now perhaps surpassing, you need to become a leader in your own way. So you have to lead. Sometimes when you're leading, you're all alone. And you know, you feel very lonely because not everyone is thinking that way or not everyone

00:41:49--> 00:42:24

wants to pray five times a day. Not everyone wants to dress appropriately. Not everyone wants to stop smoking. Not everyone wants to stop going to the clubs, not everyone wants to give up weed. Not everyone wants to simply just give up shisha. I mean, people might say, Oh, are you really talking about that? It's a fact, not everyone is the same. So there comes a time when you outgrow that. And when you feel you know what this is something of the past, I don't want to be a part of it. In that particular case, which is it's a very good thing, but you are going to need to have some leadership qualities. One of them is loving loneliness, when you're alone, it's okay, it's fine, it's good to

00:42:24--> 00:42:58

be alone. For as long as I'm not in bad company, or something that's going to take me back to where I was that I didn't really like. So from that aspect is something very, very important to be able to love your solitude, or to look for new friends, new circles, and so on, perhaps so that you can perhaps grow beyond the environment that you're in. Sometimes you may have to shift out of someplace. I remember I mean dealing with some who have been on drugs and so on. May Allah protect us and our children and everyone.

00:43:00--> 00:43:29

What happens is because they have their friends whom they grew up with, who have those bad habits, they need to get out of the whole environment and the system sometimes change suburb change city, change old circle of friends, change your phone numbers and change everything simply because it's the new you and you need to live on that level. The minute you slide back into that friendship, they're going to reintroduce you to the good old days. And for the old time sakes, you might just take a puff and the puff is the end. May Allah Almighty protect us all.

00:43:30--> 00:43:35

Okay, second, you mentioned you're a busy man with the bank. So this question says what should you slow down on?

00:43:39--> 00:43:43

What should you slow down on the speed on the M one

00:43:44--> 00:43:55

mashallah, I think today we must have clocked the speed I'm not going to say okay, here's a good advice. Like, basically, the good thing is we have ways that lets us know when and what to do Hamdulillah.

00:43:57--> 00:44:03

But my brothers and sisters, what to slow down on, you know, in life we take for granted. Our family members

00:44:05--> 00:44:35

or children, our spouses in the case of those who are married our parents, in the case of those who are not our grandparents attached, we take for granted these gifts of Allah and we don't realize that everyone is different. So you will have differences, you may not really get on with your grandparents on either side, you may not you may not get to get on with your parents, you may they may be a little bit of conflict because there is a generation gap. They may not be such a good understanding, but you have to make the most of it. You have to excuse them for a few things. That's your lineage. That's your family.

00:44:37--> 00:45:00

That's a circle that Allah has created without your involvement. But Allah has placed them there as a test for you. How much time you spend with them, how kind you are to them, how many gifts you may exchange and it means a lot to just take a simple you know, a rose and go and give your mom I mean, have you ever done that people might say no, you crazy. You know you're a chef. How could you say that? Have you ever taken a look?

00:45:00--> 00:45:41

gift for your mom or your dad or your grandparents, and just say something simple, small, you know? And say, look, I brought this for you, I hope you like it. Subhanallah if you make somebodies day, Allah will make your life. And I think we should slow down when it comes to the rat race of the outside world, as compared to that of our parents that as compared to that of those around us, whom sometimes we ignore, I don't know why the system decided to work right now. But I think it's because I've been speaking about parents. And that's a blessing, right? Okay, I'm going to switch the next card around a bit. So the Cordy reads, what are you not prioritizing, but what I want to switch to

00:45:41--> 00:45:51

is, I want to say that most of you travel a lot. And you see a lot of us and you speak to a lot of us. And so I want to ask you advice on all of us here.

00:45:53--> 00:46:28

What have you seen that kind of we could all be better at prioritizing and what should we be prioritizing at the kind of center of our lives, okay, everyone knows we're Muslim, we're supposed to have prioritized our Salah and our pillar, so I'm not going to go there, we're supposed to prioritize our relation with Allah. So I'm not going to go there, I want to talk about something that we take for granted, you know, in our relationships, and in our day to day interactions, I think the way we speak to others really, really needs to be polished, it needs to be given priority. We life has become a misery for a lot of people simply because of how others speak to them, or they

00:46:28--> 00:46:53

speak to others and sometimes it's your own spouse and family members and the way we speak down you know, and I think sometimes the the social media and the general culture across the globe is heading in that direction where you don't care what type of language you use with anyone even with yourself. So there is no self respect remaining. How are you going to respect others, I find that you know, you can be very polite, very good, very, very

00:46:54--> 00:47:30

cultured in the way you speak. And it will make a big difference to everyone including yourself, no need to scream, shout and swear that's there's no need for that sometimes you get married and within 15 minutes of just getting together with your spouse you start noticing traits that make you think did I actually make the right decision? Sometimes within a day or two, you start seeing the true colors come up and people shouting screaming and but I didn't think this was the case. You know, both sides men and women I'm not just blaming one. But I think we need to prioritize that that's something I find in a lot of people lacking you know, when someone speaks to me, I can size them up

00:47:30--> 00:47:48

in the first few minutes completely, almost unright a lot of the times I can tell you this person needs a lot of helping in in the way they were brought up maybe they weren't even brought up because a lot of the times mom and dad were never ever there for us. Nobody was there to teach us we just went to school and grew up with the rest of them you know

00:47:49--> 00:48:08

and and nobody disciplined us in any way May Allah forgive us. So sometimes I can pick it up and I wish I could help them lovely people but they lacking in something big time. And then when you try to say something they say don't judge me Okay, in that case we'll keep quiet and talk to Allah about you. What else can we do? May Allah grant us ease? I mean,

00:48:10--> 00:48:16

sharpener This is the Roman law edition zone question I really like it says what is your favorite Ramadan memory, something come to mind.

00:48:17--> 00:48:20

A lot of things come to my mind because

00:48:21--> 00:49:04

Ramadan, I usually used to spend it in one community the entire month. So I always enjoyed it because you you work on members of the community, you you work very hard to deliver something and you try to understand the people I have a habit before I tell you what I think you need to know I try to get to know you or the circumstances around you a little bit so that I don't come across hard and harsh. And you know, a person who's not considering the people you're talking to and their level. So it developed me a lot over time to say you meet different communities, different people, and they respect you big time for the sacrifice that you make for for them. Every Ramadan is always

00:49:04--> 00:49:41

unique. And I always look forward to the end of Ramadan. Just like I looked forward to the beginning of it because at the end, I can get back to my family and something interesting I can let you know. My father told me many years ago that when you go and spend Ramadan in a community don't lead salata and eat for them. I said, Well, why not? They all want you to lead Salah to lead. You were with us for the whole month that he does yours. He says no, leave the aid for a local Imam because if you want people to love you, you must understand the local Imams and the huffard they all have some something in their hearts, like a goal that they want to achieve and one of them is one day I'm

00:49:41--> 00:49:59

going to lead the Eat Salah right? So one day I'm going to lead the Salah, eat Salah takes a few minutes, it's just to record. You're a foreigner coming from outside people have made a big deal about you and so on and suddenly you've just taken someone's dream and shattered it because they 20 years they've been out

00:50:00--> 00:50:11

hanging out that opportunity and you came in Everyone's crying for you to do it. If you could be humble enough to step aside and say, Guys, look, I may be here for it, but I'm not going to lead it. I'd like one of the local guys to lead it.

00:50:13--> 00:50:52

And you know what they will love you and respect you. And you see, they know you're not here to steal my job. And you're not here to take away the dignity and honor that I'm searching for, but rather you're here to prop me up. And I think that's a beautiful piece of advice, it has helped me a lot the same applies. I am not one who wants to lead the Salah, or who wants to be you are if you notice this function, this event could have happened easily in a masjid. And we've shifted away from the masajid for many reasons. The Masjid obviously it has its place and it's nobody can take it away as Islam has given. But there are things you could not do there that you can do here. And there are

00:50:52--> 00:51:26

people who may attend here who may not attend there. And then each Masjid has its own rules and regulations. Whereas when you come into a hole, you can use your own rules and regulations. And you can have a greater cross section of people who attend when you go to a masjid by default, it belongs to a certain grouping of people, or it's run by a certain sect of people. So those who are not particularly from that particular SEC might feel uncomfortable going there. And if you have a venue of this nature, you can even have non Muslims come and they would be so excited to be here today. Subhanallah and you can have anyone those who are practicing not practicing so mashallah, there is a

00:51:26--> 00:52:08

lot to learn over time. It's not just something that was that happened. It was thought about, Laura. She's Oklahoma. So I'm going to ask you one last question, because this is a topic Eman Academy, is is who we're here representing. And I do want to talk a bit about seeking knowledge. Last question, I want to I want to seek your advice. Again, the cord it says, Would you say you're good at setting boundaries, but I want you to, I'm wondering if you can give us some advice about setting boundaries. setting boundaries depends on what exactly it is. If it's something that would displease Allah, yes, you set them and if ever you have gone close or crossed, you quickly come back and you

00:52:08--> 00:52:44

turn and you you seek the forgiveness of Allah and you strengthen yourself and you renew your vows once again with Allah to say, You know what, that is a boundary and unfortunately, I fell on the other side, but I'm coming I still believe it's a boundary and and that's not the it doesn't necessarily depict who I am, but I am on this side. So if it comes to something Halal haram, then definitely the boundaries should be set. And in my particular case, I've got quite like strong boundaries, inshallah. We're human, we're insane. We sometimes we could falter. But everyone falters on different levels, some really bad and some not bad. I remember, I've been saying it the last few

00:52:44--> 00:53:23

days when I asked the young man about his use of social media. And he says, no, no, I don't do the Haram haram. You know, I just do a haram sometimes. So I was like, What's the difference? He says, No, that's like haram haram. You know, this is just haram, you know? So it's like, oh, gosh, you know, so that was something I mentioned. And what I feel is when it comes to boundaries with other things, then, depending on what it is, you may decide to be a bit more flexible. Like sometimes I'll give you an example. You have family members, people who've been nasty to you, and so on. And you just set a limit to say, look at this point, I'm cutting off, okay, fair enough, it started to

00:53:23--> 00:53:45

become toxic, and so on, you can cut off. But sometimes it's good to try and mend relations, I think the damage of a close family member who might have hurt you or harmed you. The breaking of the relation for longer than a few years could be more damaging long term and into the next generations than it would be

00:53:46--> 00:53:51

to endure the patience of rebuilding that relationship. That's a very deep statement.

00:53:52--> 00:54:26

It's going to be a sacrifice to rebuild this relationship. But that sacrifice is cheaper than the long term loss of generations hating each other. I know a family members who don't speak to each other for a long time, they've prohibited innocent cousins from getting together for gender for a whole generation and they were grown or they grew up to believe these people are bad and ugly, but that's your brother's kids and that you know, so to invest in solving the problem is far cheaper than to allow that problem to go through the generations. You know, our kids need to get married. A lot of you here are not married. Do you agree?

00:54:27--> 00:54:29

Okay, maybe the whole of Luton is married.

00:54:31--> 00:54:38

He better respond because when I come up to speak, I'm going to ask questions if you don't answer them. I'm gonna have to leave say the place is dry man.

00:54:39--> 00:54:59

But Subhanallah a lot of us need to get married and sometimes we we have blocked off potential people who could have been spouses, you know, from the broader family. I'm not one who encourages cousin marriage. You know, the permissibility and not is something that's there in our generation and that previous it was a little bit more common, but

00:55:00--> 00:55:12

In the coming generations, we don't encourage it, the further you go, the better it is in in a lot of ways, for as long as we think similar for as long as we have similarities, culturally, we understand

00:55:13--> 00:55:29

the similarities and the differences. So you might not be of the same culture, but you understand each other, you respect each other. But I think if we invest in building relations, it's far better than enduring the loss of a broken relation.

00:55:30--> 00:55:58

This is a closure of the so we'll put the game down for a while, because I want to talk a bit about seeking knowledge. If you guys are interested in game, by the way, I am selling it at the mine Academy store today. So you can come see me there? How many questions have we clocked so far? The last few days? We probably don't because I've asked different questions, or different questions that we've already done. Maybe like 20 For now, but there's 100. Wow. So I mean, we've got to keep going. We have to ensure I'm avoiding ones with you, like are about me, because there's a lot that's like, you know,

00:55:59--> 00:56:36

asked me anything, I promise to be vulnerable. Or give me like, give you could give me a piece of advice. And I'm avoiding all the ones those ones. So you picking the hard ones? Yeah, I knew it. I had a feeling. Okay, so So we're here to speak about a man Academy as well. And you know about seeking Ice Man, Academy brothers and sisters is a platform that allows you to study your religion online. Currently, we've got an offer for five pounds a month, I will speak a bit more about it. And we'll show you a video about it in now in just a few short moments. But mostly I wanted to ask you a few things about seeking knowledge. So the first thing I want to say is, if a person let's say, for

00:56:36--> 00:57:16

example, is has reached, perhaps they're a parent now or they're slightly older, and they feel that Well, I didn't seek knowledge in my youth, or when I was a child and and so kind of what's the point now or I don't have time now, is there a point in me starting now what would you say to that person? Many times, we tend to end our relationship with learning after perhaps the primary madrasah education that is available in many cases. So we would learn how to read the Quran, the basic rules and regulations, you get to be a seven, year eight, year nine, and then suddenly, that's the end of it. And we become busy with university or with work and with various other things end up getting

00:57:16--> 00:57:55

married and so on. And then there comes a time when you realize you know what, gosh, I don't know much about my Deen in terms of Quran in terms of rules and regulations in terms of Hadith, for example, in terms of Tafseer, in terms of a few other rules and regulations. And, you know, when you hear this, it sounds like you're either a scholar, or you're not. But you don't realize in the middle, there is a category of students of knowledge, people who spend some of their time trying to learn things, and you may never end up knowing everything. And you wouldn't obviously, because up to the point of death, you expand your knowledge, but you won't have all of the knowledge. So imagine

00:57:55--> 00:58:40

Academy when it was founded, the idea was to make something to create for an alternative for those who don't really have much time because they're busy at work or with other responsibilities and the learning is at your pace. So it can be slow, it can be fast based on what you want. You join and you dictate the pace, how many minutes do you have a day and at what time of the day, you can log on and you will find the lesson ready for you. So I think it's extremely important for us to continue to expand our knowledge even if we're older. And we have various other commitments or chores or responsibilities, we still have to expand our knowledge because the process alum has asked us to

00:58:40--> 00:59:09

seek knowledge from the beginning to the end. And obviously the Sahaba the Allah whom were equally vocal about seeking knowledge, teaching it and so on. And the same applies to all those who followed. So inshallah I pray that we can seek a little bit of knowledge every single day, one of the Hadith and that's the last one I'm going to mention here is the prophets of salaam says whoever treads the path of seeking knowledge.

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When silica peritoneal term is Sufi Illman So hello, Allah hula who will be here or you can email Jana, whoever treads a path of seeking knowledge. By the blessing of that and the baraka of it, Allah makes the path to Paradise, easier for that person. And in another narration, he says, a student of knowledge, even the angels lower their wings in order to cushion the path of those who are treading knowledge. I think that if you learn one new thing a day, surely every day the angels will lower their wings for you. Every day you have the path of paradise being made easier for you every day you feel a lot of blessings even though I just spent five minutes on my phone, my app, you

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know, maybe 15 minutes on tick tock, but just fine.

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minutes on the Hadith, guess what happened? Allah will grant me acceptance in one way or another, slowly but surely the good will increase, the bad will decrease. And I'm preparing for the day I meet with Allah. How different is accessibility to knowledge now as it was, for example, when you were kind of a younger student, wow.

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Knowledge is much more accessible. But the the general laziness in the people is equally meaning is negative. So it actually balances it out. What that means is, in my time and even earlier, we used to have to go to the libraries to research a certain, say, for example, ruling in Islam. And we actually went out, you look at 3040 books come back the next day, the following day, and so on. Now, it's a click of a button or two. And it's a little bit difficult at times, because you just need to know where to look. But still, there is laziness such that people don't even want to do that much. So it's like Allah Almighty knew these guys are not going to read books, let me just give them the

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internet. But now with the internet, it's still that much. I mean, in all honesty, these guys are not going to read books. So Allah has blessed them with internet, but they're still not, you know, making use of it. So that's why we're here to say, as much as it is very accessible, you need to make use of that and Allah will question you from Mullah to alumina Yama, even and in him. On that day, Allah is going to ask you about the gifts he bestowed upon you. One of them is definitely an Atma, that you just have everything at your fingertips. I mean, here, you're being told about Eman Academy, about so many other academies about scholars and so many lectures that you can hear online,

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it's not just, it's not just a 32nd bite that you need to listen to or watch. It's more than that you need to make an effort. And we all do we all do. I've found for myself, also to expand knowledge, there are a lot of lessons that you have online that are in depth in depth from from senior scholars, so it's important to make use of that. Well, you just mentioned that we all going to be questioned on it. And my question to you is, what would you say to the person who perhaps says, Well, I have a family I have work, I you know, I have my whole day planned out? Why am I able to fit this in? And how am I supposed to fit all of these studies in as well? How important is it?

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What should I be learning? I think when we established demand Academy some time back one of the main points was to keep it such that anyone can listen to the lesson and join in at any time of their convenience. So much so that some people were complaining that this is moving too slow. But actually we are catering for those exactly, as you mentioned, who don't have the time busy with family busy with this with that you can actually join at your time, you've got to make the time, anytime of the day make the time and then you when you click in it's not like the whole class has to be there together. You can hear it the lesson at your convenience. And then it takes off you can hear it

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again you know it's ticked off and then you can you unlock the next lesson because you heard the previous one. So that's how we managed it mainly to cater for what you're just mentioning now because we do know everyone is different everyone works differently. Everyone's ours are different. Some of the mums and dads out there have responsibilities with the kids and you know, so many things need to happen. So yeah, you need to find those

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perhaps online academies or schools that have catered for this. I hope you guys enjoyed that episode we did we did our best at stitching it all together and keeping it as kind of like flowing as possible despite the various audio challenges that we had with that. But I hope you guys enjoyed it and took something from it. Do remember if you want to get the game you can grab it shoplet And of course this t shirt and also if you want to see more live at freshly guarded you can come to our live tour at fresh Ford slash tour enjoy. I mean no not enjoy because these episodes finished. Yes still enjoy though. Why not? enjoy doing something else

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now? Goodbye.