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Dealing with Loss

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Mufti Menk

Channel: Mufti Menk

Episode Notes

Jumu’ah Lecture Arcadia Masjid, Harare Zimbabwe, 17 August 2018

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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Salam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatu

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Bismillah al Rahman al Rahim In the name of Allah subhanho wa Taala the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful Alhamdulillah All praise is indeed due to Allah subhanho wa Jalla wa salatu salam ala rasulillah Allah Allah He was happy Jemaine blessings and salutations upon Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam his household, his companions. We ask Allah Subhana Allah to Allah, to bless them and to bless every one of us and to grant us all every form of goodness. And to grant us paradise to grant us Jen Nuttall for those my brothers and sisters,

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life is such that men always want something that is beneficial for him or her.

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When you live your life, as you grow older, from a very young age, you always want something that you believe is better for you. That is normal. When the little child sees a toy, he thinks the toy is good for him. So he cries, in order to get the toy. If you don't give the child the toy, you have a problem, because it's not going to be easy to keep the child quiet. Sometimes, for example, there is something dangerous, such as a wire that is coming out, or a cable that is protruding from a source of electricity. But because it is yellow, blue, or green, it looks colorful, a little child who is not taught might want to go and touch that cable. But you as an adult, if you were to catch

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the child, on the way to the cable, you would actually get hold of the child and move the child away, even if the child is screaming and yelling. But you know what you did?

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You follow? You know what you did you save the child. For example, a child wants to play with a knife, you know that I need to slowly get the knife out of the child's hand before the child is cut,

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or even killed. If you see a little boy playing with a gun, you would automatically want to get that gun out of the hands of that boy to save your life, his life and everybody's life. In order for us to be able to do that which is correct, the child might cry or might become angry and upset. So the point I'm raising is man always wants what he thinks is better for him, not realizing that certain things are not good for you. So through the mercy of Allah, Allah says, no matter how old you are, even if you're an old woman or an old man, mature, intelligent, Allah says this, I know it's not good for you. I'm going to skip it away from you. I'm going to carry you out of those cables that

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are alive in order that you save your life. I know that it's dangerous for you, and you are busy screaming and yelling like little baby and Allah doesn't even mind he still takes you out. He knows he did you a favor. Subhan Allah Subhana Allah, I want to tell you the gist of today's talk is connected to the favor of Allah upon you and I, when he does that, which I don't want and you don't want but he wants.

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It's a favor. If you believe in Allah, you will automatically believe that whatever he has chosen for me is the absolute best. There's no chance that that can be anything besides the ultimate test.

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Sometimes you lose your job and you are very, very upset. While you are upset, your Eman became weak. Rather when you lose your job, you asked yourself a few questions. Number one, was it your fault? If it was your fault, you have some rectification to do but still it was better. Allah wanted to teach you a lesson. Someone went to steal he had a very good job earning a few 100 every one every month. And you know what, when he stole he lost his job. When he lost his job. He cannot say Allah is the Greatest and Alhamdulillah etc, etc because he is a thief. So he is to blame. Indeed Allah is the Greatest but don't use that statement to justify robbery. Don't use that statement to

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justify a claim. But what you can tell yourself is I am paying in order to compensate for my

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Sin May Allah forgive me I was wrong. I think Allah I was caught so that I am no longer a thief I might get away with robbery in this world but I will never get away with robbery in the hereafter if I have stolen from you and no one found out and I grew older and still no one found out and I stole from this one and that one and no one found out do you know what will happen? If they didn't find out in the hereafter they will all find out. So can Allah Subhana Allah unless you seek forgiveness, you make amends with those whom you have wronged and you clear the record with them, then it's okay. So when you lose your job or something bad happens when, for example, you're involved in a car

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crash, you ask yourself What went wrong? If it was your fault, there has to be some rectification that comes from you. If you were driving at 200 kilometres an hour and you busy you bashed into the tree

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Subhanallah you can't say, oh, Allah did me a favor by me bashing into the tree and the end. You know what next time I'll be driving at 300 I inshallah Allah will do me another favor by me bashing into a bigger tree? No, no, no, no, no, you are confusing yourself with mixing the truth and falsehood together such that you don't know what you're saying. You've got to say I thank Allah for saving me, but I was wrong to try first. You see, I thank Allah that I got another job. But my previous job was better. But I was a thief. I'm not going to steal now. You see, I've changed my life. This is now common logic.

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So when you lose something, even if you are married, you are promiscuous. You are a drunkard. You might be on drugs. May Allah save all of us. If that's the reason why your marriage broke because your mouth was dangerous, then it is you to blame. You can say I think Allah that everything of this nature happened. No, you might think Allah that your spouse did not beat you. For example, you might thank Allah that your spouse did not destroy you as a person or things of that nature. But you need to self reflect and correct what was wrong. Otherwise, tomorrow is going to be a bigger disaster than today. If you lost your job, because you were a thief, and you went into another job and you

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stole more, the next time, they'll jail you for 10 years. You're not going to get away with it, it will get worse. If you committed adultery and you a marriage broke and you committed double that adultery in the next marriage. Someone might just do something that is dangerous to you, because they wouldn't be able to take it. We're not encouraging it. But we're saying it can happen.

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So in essence, when something wrong happens in your life, ask yourself what was my role in all of this, if you don't have a job, but you are not looking for a job, you are to blame. I cannot sit at home and say I'm making dua to Allah Oh Allah grant me a job. And I'm looking at the ceiling. And suddenly the ceiling cracks and I'm smiling, the job is coming.

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Where's the job coming from? You didn't go up to look for the job. You didn't move. You didn't talk to people. You didn't go every day for one year, you walk from place to place, please, I'm looking for a job. This is my CV, I this is my experience, I need a job, look for it, look for it, keep looking for it. Subhana Allah, then then, you know, if you didn't get something, you say, Oh Allah, I trust you, you are the best, I know that you are keeping me in such a beautiful position. Because I'm trying whatever you told me to try, but your decision has overridden mine completely. And Allah is the boss.

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So when you are to blame, you need to correct that issue that you are to blame for corrected. But when you are not to blame, you tried your best. And you know that Subhana Allah, there's nothing more that I could have done for this, then you must know that Allah has made the decision that is the best for you. For example, you are looking for a job and this is an example that happens to many people.

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He didn't give you a job B didn't give you a job c didn't give you a job, don't get upset, don't get angry. Smile every day believe that Allah is doing something good for you. They didn't give you a job. He didn't give you a job f didn't give you a job.

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g didn't give you a job. How many people are not giving me a job. So Allah says you know what?

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We want you to get a job with J because the salary there is going to be five times more than all of these.

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Or your business a didn't work B didn't work. C didn't work. D didn't work. Allah says you know why all of those didn't work. Because if they had worked, your income would have only been so much. But the minute we gave you E and you went into E, it flourished more than a B, C and D established. Your your profit was now a huge margin. So how

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Sometimes you lose your job in order for Allah to facilitate for you a better job. I know of a person who used to work for an airline.

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He lost his job. He started his own thing a little while later, Allah gave him so much money that he purchased his own aeroplanes. Subhan Allah, had he not been fired from that place, he would have still been sitting there working for the airline. But when he released and he started his own thing, some time later, he started purchasing his own planes, he owns his own private planes.

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So when you lose something, I've given you the example of jobs because here in Zimbabwe, our slogan is jobs, jobs, jobs, I'm sure you've heard that, we hope that inshallah they come, but by the will of Allah subhanho wa Taala. What I need to let you know is to display Allah is in control. Don't look at things from a negative eye, if you yourself are trying, when you need to look at it negatively is when you are a negative person, there's nothing good about you, you are a liar, a cheat a deceiver, a sinner, you're not interested in turning to Allah, you're not interested in halaal you're not interested in anything good, then you ought to be depressed. Because whatever

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you're doing is depression itself.

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So don't complain and depressed when everything you're doing is depression, like command, smoking, something that is not supposed to smoke. And he's saying, am I you are high because you made yourself high. That's what it is. You are depressed because you made yourself depressed, why you turned away from Allah, you're looking at things in such you are living such a negative life looking at things in such a negative way. How do you expect positivity to come into your life?

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But if you are trying, then you must remember with your trial, you will have trials in your own life also chosen by Allah, he has to examine you test you has even

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turaco a coup.

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We read this verse over and over again. So Allah says, Does man think that he it's enough for him to say I'm a good believer, I'm a true believer in Allah, then we are not going to test him.

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That is the time Allah will test you.

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I always give the example of a school. Do you ever see school teacher standing by the gate of the school looking at those who are passing by saying, Hey, come here for your examination. Here is the paper they never do that because that person is not enrolled in the school. Those who are outside the school are not tested with the examinations of the school. No, but the minute you enter the school, you will have to sit the exam otherwise you cannot call yourself qualified at that school. The same applies to Islam. The same applies to Allah subhanho wa Taala. When you declare your award min Allah says

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Allah Allah Subhan Allah Allah Dena Sadako Allah and lemon Alka the mean, Allah will test you to the degree that he distinguishes between whether you are truthful, or you're just a liar. If I say I'm a movement, I believe in Allah Allah says, Okay, come here. Let's test you. Right? We're going to take away this from you. Do you still believe in Allah? Yes. Okay, we will give you this. Do you still believe in Allah? Yes. Did it make you arrogant? No, you are passing? you're passing your test. Right? Come back. We are going to take your child away. Right? The child passed away. Do you still believe in us? Yes. You passing your test? Okay. What else will we do? We take away your leg, your

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health, we take away your wealth. Do you still believe in Allah? Yes. You pass your tests right now we will give you the most beautiful thing in the world. Did it make you arrogant? No. Do we are going to give you authority? Did it make you arrogant? No. Did it turn you away from Allah? No. Did it make you forget Allah No. Well done. 10 out of 10 years genital photos, you can now enter the you have your certificate that is a man that is Islam. You are tested because you came in. So when you see those who are not what meaning they will not be tested the way you are tested. That's the reason why the meaning always they will go through much more difficulty than anyone else. From the time of

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the previous prophets. Look at Jesus alayhi salatu was salam, may peace be on him Jesus? What difficulty Did he go through? He went through the most compared to everyone in his time. Look at Muhammad Sallallahu sallam, what difficulty Did he go through? He went through the most of all time. What what difficulty did the other messengers go through yet they were the messengers. They were the chosen ones of Allah, they were the highest, they were the greatest they were close to Allah. But Allah tested them too.

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And Allah did not need to test them. But Allah wanted to show us

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and take an example of Jesus May peace be upon him, the amount of difficulty that he suffered, the extent of it is such that nobody can say that if Allah tests you, he does not like you know, if he tests you, he loves you because he tested those who are closer to him with that which was bigger than what you are going through right now. So do not despair. But Your duty is to keep trying. The minute you stop trying. You are lost. You have lost. You see, I give you one

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Example. You must have seen or You must have heard of the World Cup France vs. Croatia. Right? If you look at what happened, for example,

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what happened?

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The score? I think it was for 2am. I right? For to see you nodding because we know Yes, it was for two. That's why I'm giving you the example. So whichever team initially started winning is not necessarily the team that is going to win at the end, for as long as the team that is losing, keeps on playing. That's a powerful example. If you are losing right now, for as long as you keep playing, it does not mean you're going to be a loser in the future. The minute you stop playing, the game is over. Because imagine if Croatia scored two and France was sitting at zero, for example, and they said, haha, we are not going to win you try to Gaza is over. And then they decided the match is

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gone. And you know what, let's just play marbles here instead of anything because it's over. If that was the case, were they going to win? The answer is no, they will not. What did they do? And what would anyone do? You keep playing? You keep trying you score one, it's still now two, one, you score another one. It's true. Two people are now excited. You score another one, it's three, two, you couldn't believe it. And you score one more to put the final nail in the coffin and it's over what happened, you won. You came out so victorious, that people looked at you and they said, You know what, you deserve a World Cup.

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I promise you, my brothers, my sisters. When shaytan scores a goal against you, it's not the end, but keep playing. That ball needs to be kicked. It's not a physical ball. It's a different type of a ball. Because it's your life. You need to learn life, you need to keep on going run, keep on running, you see you watch those players, they are sweating, what happens? They sweat for the whole 90 minutes, they keep going. Sometimes they have extra time. Sometimes it goes to penalties, whatever that is the example I'm trying to give you today is they didn't lose hope. That's what it was.

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And now I want to tell you something.

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So as much as I've addressed the issue of when things go wrong, let me address the issue of when things go right. When things go right, my beloved brothers and sisters, never let that make you lose your or drop your guard. Lose your connection with Allah. Sometimes Allah will test you, like I said, by giving you I went for a job first job, I got it. And it was very beautiful. And I became a manager and the director and the CEO and I started I had so many people working under me. But do I read Salah? No, you've lost? Am I connected to Allah? No, lost? Did I develop bad habits? Yes, you've lost? Did I start using my money, my authority, my wealth. In that which was earning the

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displeasure of Allah, yes, you have lost, you are not a winner if your success makes you distinct from Allah in any way. So sometimes Allah says, I'm not going to give you that success. Because I know if I give you that success and pleasure, right now, you are going to lose something greater than that, bringing me back to the point of how when a child thinks it was something that is very beneficial for it by running towards the red, yellow, green and blue colors of the cords that are alive electricity, you will go and take the child away from what he firmly believes is the best for it. And whether it is yelling and screaming, you will take it into what you know is total safety and

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the life was saved. So when Allah knows that you are heading in the wrong direction, or you will be heading in the wrong direction.

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Whether you are yelling, screaming, shouting is going to take you away from what you firmly believe is the best for you. And he will give you what he knows is the best for you by saving your era by saving your agenda which is actually eternal. And in the process you might be feeling in your life if you don't have proper faith, that you know what I took away from me x, y and Zed but you don't realize Allah is smiling at you saying you know what? We actually gave you the eternal success by keeping you away from those small things that you thought were better for you because we know if you got that you were going to turn away from us. No Salah, no, no goodness, lots of arrogance, lots of

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sins, drinking, everything else was going to come into the equation and you are going to lose the bigger picture just like the child would have died of electrocution or be electrocuted. So Panama, what a powerful message we have. What a powerful message. This is why and I end with the statement. Be happy with the decree of Allah.

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be satisfied with what Allah has done for you. Be very firmly be convinced that there is nothing better that could have happened for me besides what Allah has chosen for me, and that is called a true belief

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and for the benefit of those who may not have heard that message

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Say it again. When something bad happens in your life, the first question you ask yourself is what was my role to play in this? If you are to blame, you need to rectify the blame, seek forgiveness and sorted out.

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But if you are not to blame, you must be very happy, very excited because now it is Allah in play, and he is putting you away he knows it's better for you.

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This is why I always say, when things happen my way I'm happy. when things don't happen my way I'm even happier because now they are happening the way of Allah

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Subhana Allah.

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I am not trying to say that when things happen my way it's not the way of Allah but it goes to show that Allah gave you what you wanted. But when you want something desperately analysis, no, no, no, no, no, you need to be so happy. Please think of the code that I told you about earlier. Think of the other examples testing of those examples and tell yourself Yala, I am trying. Allah will ask you will you straight? Were you conscious of us? Did you fulfill your Salah? Did you the first thing you're going to be asked about the Salah.

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When you die, Allah is not going to ask you, did you lose your job? First question. That's not the first question. I was not going to ask you when you divorced.

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When you go into the asset, or one of the first things you will ever be asked, Did you fulfill your Salah? If the answer to that is positive, the rest of your test will be very easy. You're already a VIP.

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If the answer to that is negative, there's going to be some issues. Therefore my brothers my sisters, I strongly recommend that you establish Salah established prayer. Come what may may Allah strengthen us make a strong enjoy it. It is your connection with Allah. We believe that when we die, we are going to go somewhere that is far better than where we are right now. establish your prayer, your connection with Allah. Don't worry about the people. People will keep saying things doing things. No, they should not depress you know, despair. But what you need to do make sure you know, I am convinced my maker loves me. I love him. I worship Him alone. I tried to be a good person. So

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anything that's going to come in my direction is the best thing for me a poo colada or sallallahu wasallam ah Baraka Allah Nabina Muhammad