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The Trap Of Dependancy
Channel: Moutasem al-Hameedy
File Size: 16.90MB
Jumuah Khutbah at the Abu Huraira Center on June 30, 2017.
Episode Transcript ©
Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate and at times crude. We are considering building a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system. No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.
To get forbid passes away, then the whole 300 members share the cost of that funeral. So for example, for $5,000, today, if we have about 300 families, it might come to up to 16 to $20 as a cost, so you will get an email
letting you know, so and so family passed away. Next week, we'll be withdrawing $20 from the account for that funeral. And that's it. So, every year, every time and Sussex is speaking, the average death rate within the Muslim community right now is about six point something percent. So, you know, depending on how big of the members is, is not something that you'll be doing it too much throughout Aliza $20 or $15. As we grow, if you 500 people, it goes down, if is more, it goes down, and is a way to share the costs. So nobody incurs that costs on their selves, and is always going to cost you 15 to $20 to help in the funeral costs for you and for anybody else in that members. So,
these are the flyers the outside very simple is online registration, take it with you because and registered online, fill out all the information as needed, your banking information will be needed. So that we have that automatic withdrawal would happen after somebody passes away after we inform you. You don't give you a heads up a week or so, they will be withdrawal. So your bank information will be required and all your family information all your dependence will be
also inquire required there. So please go take the fly with you very simple.
Muslim care.ca Muslim care that ca and get a please let's help each other. And once we reach the 300 members
in the law, that's when the we will activate and the membership and the collective will go together. So is a good project in Sharla. And everybody who's in the proportions of volunteer, the initial $150 membership is all will go toward buying a graveyard ahead of time for supporting the Muslim cemetery green cemetery so that even that money is going to go to buying a graveyard. So please do and if you need more information you can approach us to challenge slavery.
In Alhamdulilah no matter who want to start, you know who want to stop
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ilaha illa la la sharika a shadow Mohammedan Abu Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa alayhi wasallam
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had he had you Mohammed in sallallahu alayhi wa early he was an alum or shalom Auriemma to her wakulla de tiene de Vaca. Levy. datain. Allah Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah to infinity.
All praise is due to Allah, we praise Him, we seek his aid and we ask for his forgiveness. We seek refuge we seek protection and a lot from the evils of ourselves and the evil consequences of our own actions. Whomsoever Allah guides, none can lead us astray and whomsoever Allah leaves to go astray in and can guide I bear witness, I testify that none has the right to be worshipped. None has the right to our ultimate love and devotion except Allah subhanho wa Taala alone. And I testify that Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa alayhi wa sallam is his servant, and His Messenger all you who believe. Fear Allah as you should be feared and do not accept as Muslims in a state of submission to
your Lord. All Mankind be dutiful to a Lord who created you from a single person. from him, he created his wife from them both. He created many men and women, and fear Allah through whom you demand and fear Allah through whom we demand you mutual rights and observed the rights of your kinship. Surely Allah is Ever an old watcher over you. Oh, you who believe. Keep your duty to Allah, fear him and speak the truth. He will direct you to righteous deeds and will forgive you your sins and whoever obeys Allah and His Messenger has indeed attained a great a great achievement,
the best speech or the words of Allah, and the best guidance is that of Mohammed sallallahu alayhi wa ala he was setting them and the worst thing in the religion or the newly invented matters for all the newly invented matters or innovation, and every innovation and misguidance and it leads to the hellfire.
Ramadan is gone now.
Ramadan is gone but our relationship with the last panel with Allah should never go because it's not contingent only on Ramadan. It's not only a relationship that is based on the month of Ramadan. Our relationship with Allah subhanaw taala is much deeper than that and should be stronger than that. It's not an occasional kind of link to Allah subhana wa
But it should be a way of life. And
the responsibility for our own lives, each one of us for their own life, for their own lifestyle, for how their life unfolds for the outcomes and the fruits of the life lies in each individual's hands. You are responsible for your life, how it turns out to be,
how you handle a law throws your way. And what you create with whatever Allah subhanaw taala has given you, that's your responsibility. The problems that you go through are your responsibility. The blessings that you go through and the that you enjoy in your life are your responsibility.
what you make of this whole life is your responsibility. You can blame conditions, you can blame people, you can expect others to intervene and interject and change your life and fix your life. But at the end of the day, your life is your responsibility. Because that's the point behind this life. That's the point behind creating human beings is that life is your responsibility. So if you were dependent on the month of Ramadan
to make you a better person, and then that's it, once Ramadan is over, you lose control. Once Ramadan is over, you don't make an effort, then you're playing the wrong game or you're playing the game with the wrong rules. Your life is your responsibility. Your relationship with Allah is your responsibility. And no one can take care of it. By the way everyone has enough on their shoulders. Everyone has enough on their shoulders. If you think a scholar if you think can imagine if you think a mother or a father or a brother or a good friend is responsible for your religion is your is responsible for your relationship with Allah subhana wa tada you're playing a dangerous game.
You're playing a dangerous game. You are responsible. And Allah Subhana Allah says in the Quran so clearly wakulla insane and allozyme nahata era houfy are okay wannacry Judah Julio malkia, Makita been young woman Shula.
Every human being, we have placed the responsibility of their life of the actions of everything about their life, round their neck.
So on the Day of Judgment, you will be asked about this life, you will be questioned about it.
So if you take it for granted, you will miss the point Allah will make you stand in front of him. And he will ask you about every second in your life. What did you do with it?
It's not for free. I've given you this life. I've given you this time. I've given you youth, I've given you eyes, I've given you a nose and ears. I've given you strength and energy. I've given you a body. I've given you a society to live in.
I've given you so many things around what did you do with them? Allah will ask you about each one of them. Each one of them comes with a responsibility. And we humans are inherently born we our whole flesh is mixed up with this sense of responsibility, and you can't live life running away from it.
And this way the prophet SAW Selim says in the authentic hadith narrated in a Muslim
in Amman at another latvija, very Uber region, the man of the trust,
trust of what the responsibility for this life was given with you, you were born with it. It's in your hearts. It's in the deepest recesses of your of your hearts, a sense of responsibility. And it's also in the Quran. Allah explains that this is the very beginning of the creation of the human beings. Allah says in Adam and Anita is what will happen outwardly. What did you ban Amina Amina Mohammed Al insana in Canada lumen j hula.
We have offered the trust means responsibility for this life, taking responsibility and accountability for this life. We have choice we have offered it to the mountains to the skies to the earth, and they're reclined. They declined. They didn't want to see it. They declined to hold this responsibility. They felt pity for themselves to hold it and take charge of it. But man ticket man decided to take it in who can have a lumen Jehovah man is full of these two problems, oppression, injustice and ignorance.
So the very fabric of human beings is to take responsibility for one's life. You're responsible for this life. And the problem is we live most of our life running away from this risk.
possibility. But the problem is there is no escape You can't escape it. It's your fate. This responsibility is your fate. And this is why today we will explore different types and shapes and phases of this kind of dependency that we have on other things that give us a false sense of security and suck the life out of our existence here. And then that means we will face the negative and detrimental and, and disastrous, disastrous consequences of this kind of choice, that we don't hold responsibility for this life. Allah subhanaw taala says, but in Santa Ana NFC de basura Belen in Santa Ana NFC he basura
de la, man is a water over himself. Each soul is a watcher over itself.
You are watching over yourself.
And even if you give any excuses, I didn't have a good upbringing. I was facing financial difficulties, I was abused, I was traumatized. I was this, this is how I was brought up, this was my culture. This was the norms, and so on. So no one educated me, no one taught me. Allah subhanaw taala says even if you throw all of these present all of these excuses, none of them will work. Because the sense of responsibility is stronger than all of all of these excuses. There's nothing deeper in your life, then a sense of responsibility. And that's why you cannot guide whomever your love or loss of analysis to the profits or loss of them in Nicoletta demon, but you cannot guide
whomever you want. You cannot guide even the people you love. Why because a sense of responsibility is deep inside every human being, they have to make their choices. So if you depend on your parents to guide you, and make you a better person, you're mistaken. If you think your Eman is gonna make you a better person, you're wrong.
If you think your friend is gonna make you a better Muslim, you're wrong. If you think someone is going to carry the burden of your sins, you're wrong, even if they are the ones who guided you to the sin.
You will, you will deal with the consequences of his sins by yourself.
There's no escape.
Because you are responsible for your life, you are responsible.
If you blame circumstances, if you blame people, if you blame the system, if you blame conditions, if you blame, whatever kind of excuse you come up with, it's not going to work, it's a bluff. And on the day of gentlemen, all of this will just fall apart. And you will be face to face with the sense of responsibility and what you have done with it. And if you let other people decide for you, you let other people choose for you. That's also a choice. And that's what you will face. You have made a choice. You cannot escape from that as a human being. There's no escape from making choices about your life. And the law holds you accountable for that. That's the biggest factor about life. And
that's why Allah subhanho wa Taala says on the day of review, if you ask him, Are you wondering what kind of responsibility Should I hold? It's how your life unfolds? What do you do with it? What do you believe in your beliefs or your responsibility, you have to choose your beliefs consciously. You have to check and verify your beliefs consciously.
Your assumptions, you have to check them one after the other.
Your attitudes, your convictions, your intentions, your actions, your lifestyle, you are responsible for each one of those, you can't say, I have been programmed this way, I have been brought up this way. I was educated this way. I was created this way, no excuse you will be held accountable. You can change all of that. You can change it and that's the honor that Allah has given human beings the ability to choose.
But most of us are not brave enough. We don't have enough guts
to come face to face and check our beliefs and our convictions and our assumptions and our attitudes and our habits and our behaviors and our desires. We don't have the guts to face that. We want to live as slaves for that because it's more convenient, and there's more comfortable. We want to keep you know flowing with the tide, following what everyone says or following the lifestyle that I have been brought up to, to follow and and to live. But that doesn't work with a law that's still unexcused and doesn't work on the Day of Judgment. Allah will reveal the truth to you and you will regret you will regret any kind of choices. You have made wrong.
choices you have not made when you're supposed to make them. And that's the worst.
That's the worst you cannot run away from choice. And Allah subhanaw taala says in the Quran this way repeatedly, you will find the last one that talks about these three FLR. Yet, don't you? Don't they reflect? Don't they think you have to reflect you have to think of Alaia to the current one they remember, then they deeply consider and reflect on the reality of this life and reality of everything. You have to take the lead, you have to take the leadership position in your life, you have to think about everything, you have to question things. You have to question your assumptions. You have to find out for yourself.
FLIR qilu don't they understand, don't they comprehend, because that's your responsibility. When you take whatever society tells you, when you take whatever the media tells you, when you take whatever your parents tell you. Whatever you take, whatever any person tells you, you take it for granted, you are jeopardizing your sense of choice,
and you will still be held accountable for it. If they made a mistake, and you just took it for granted, you will be held accountable for it, you can blame them. You can blame them. Once it enters your world, your personal territory, you are responsible for it, you have to check it.
You have to verify it, you have to understand it.
You can't take things for granted. You say oh, I was leaving a comfortable life. I don't want to go into this. I don't want to check everything. Well, good luck for you. Because on the Day of Judgment, you will be questioned about about that. You let people choose for you. You let people decide about your life. You let people decide about your beliefs, and about your lifestyle and about your attitudes and about your actions. You let them do this, you will deal with the consequences. They made the choices for you. But that's your choice, and you will be held accountable for it.
When you enter into a business, you verify everything for yourself. If it's a personal business, you will verify everything people will come to you with data, but you will double check it, you will question it. People come to you with a business model you will look at other business models and other alternatives. You do not take things for granted. Why? Because it's your wealth. What about your eternal life? What about your heart? What about your soul? You have to take responsibility for it.
So Ramadan has ended. But it doesn't mean that the responsibility has ended. If you depend on the sense of Ramadan, because it's mainly congregational people come to break their fast together, people come to pray fudger together, people come to pray to Allah, we're together, people sometimes get together and recycle on. So it's easier for you to do it with other people, but you don't take responsibility for yourself. So what I'm about is over, and all these congregational acts are no longer there, you go back to your old ways. You can't worship Allah. You can't worship Allah by yourself.
And that's the problem, because you depend on other people. And we have so many faces of dependency. And this makes us weak and vulnerable.
It makes us weak and vulnerable as individuals. And as communities and as societies. And as a nation. It makes us weak.
Because we are being programmed. People move us around with remote controls.
People are pulling our strings and we don't realize we're not taking responsibility for our lives. We take the easy way out thinking we can escape. We can put our heads bury our heads in the sand and think we're playing safe.
But facts are facts and you have to deal with them at the end of the day.
So that's why you will find this sense of responsibility coming around in the Quran so often. So often.
Allah subhanaw taala says in the Quran,
Kowloon fcmb Marchesa bhatura Hina.
Each self each individual, each human being is captive to their own actions, your actions will decide what will happen to you on the Day of Judgment.
Regardless whether you made a conscious choice or you're just born choices from someone else, or from society, or from other sources, you will face the consequences. So what have you done with your life? What have you done with your life and sense of responsibility? First of all, you have to take and hold a sense of responsibility over your beliefs with the last panel about the last panel. What do you believe about Allah? Is it a lot talks about himself in the Quran and in the authentic son of the prophet SAW Selim? Do you know Allah subhanaw taala as he revealed himself in his book and in the Sunnah of the prophet SAW center? Do you know him like that? Do you understand him? Do you feel
the connection to Allah? Do you feel the love towards Allah? Do you have fear from Allah?
does it play a vital
volun Your life is essential in your daily dealings in your feelings.
Is it there? Is it a main component in your life? Or is it something that you put on the shelf? And you only?
Take it and deal with it when you come to the masjid? That's it? Oh, once a week, or once a day?
Or is it a guiding principle that guides your life guides your decisions, guides your actions, and guides your feelings and guides your intentions? That's the question. What do you believe, believe about this life?
What do you believe about this life? What have you done with everything Allah has given you? Do you take responsibility for your feelings? A lot of us are dependent on others. We depend on our shake, to make us better Muslims. We depend on our spouse to make us feel better. We create problems at home, but my wife has to fix them. She has to do with me, that's who I am. That's how I was created. I've been like this all my life, she has to deal with the problem.
She lives in hell. But she has to deal with that. It's not my responsibility. That's weakness.
That's cowardice. Oh, she creates problems. And she says he has to handle me. He chose me, he married me, he has to live with me, I can't change. I've been like this all my life. My whole family has been like this, he has to deal with that.
But you're still responsible.
You're still responsible.
We mistreat sometimes our kids and we say, well, that's how I was treated when I was a kid. So let them taste the same thing. I can't, I can't be different, because that's what I faced when I was a child.
But you're responsible because you can make a conscious choice. And you can change them. There are so many parents who lived a miserable life, but they decided to make a difference. And put an end to this vicious cycle of oppression and wrong kind of upbringing
can be the engine of change in your life. Or you can depend on someone else. You know, in other religions, you make a sin, you just go on to confess, and that sin the sin is taken. Why? Because sort of the priest or the religious person, they can take away your sense of you can depend on them. That's false dependency, the sins you make, you have to turn to Allah. If a shake makes you feel better, that doesn't mean anything.
It doesn't mean anything.
So many people have problems in their homes, they're creating their own problems, how through their daily habits, their daily practices, they create problems with their spouse, with their children, or with their bigger family, and so on and so forth. Then they come and find they want to find someone to fix that problem, fix it for me, no one can fix it for you, unless you start taking responsibility for it and changing it. People suffer from depression. People suffer suffer from anxiety, panic attacks, I'm lost in my life, I can't change your life. Allah says to the prophet in Nicoletta demon, that
you do not guide the people you love. Allah guides, whomever He wills.
Your wife is not going to fix your problems. Your father is not going to fix your problems. Your friend is not going to fix your problems, you have to take responsibility. Once you take responsibility, you start to see things differently.
From where you are, when you try to escape and run away from responsibility, you can't see things in a positive way you you just cannot. It's a standard. It's a standpoint, it's a perspective, and it controls you.
And by the way, that's how the media ignites the hate mongers and the racists.
It makes them see themselves as victims were just victims. And once they see themselves as victims, that everyone is trying to destroy them. Everyone is trying to take what's in their hands. Everyone is trying to kill them. And they feel they are the victims so they can justify for themselves. The whatever crime they want to do.
It's again because once you once you take away responsibility as a victim, it's not my fault.
You can justify whatever you want, no matter how evil it is. But you can only see things differently when you change your perspective and take responsibility for your life. And that's what life is about. That's what the test of this life is all about. It's about this Amana, Islam as a trust in Islam is not just some small rituals here and there. Islam is a whole way of life. It's an outward outlook on life. It's a lifestyle, everything in your life. Every small thing is part and parcel of Islam. Islam is a way of life, don't make it into some kind of
Have a some kind of a dogma, some kind of a cult Islam is not like this. This is the limitation of our own brains. Islam is far bigger than this is far bigger than this.
It will come in kalida Memphis
hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa salatu salam ala Sayyidina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa that
so we are responsible for our lives. And a last minute Allah says in the Quran when after sin one master worker for Alabama for Georgia, where taqwa and self that Allah has created a lot created us, each individual Allah created them. And Allah has offered them two ways. For joola taqwa,
a way to obey Allah subhanaw taala and follow his way or a way to follow the evolution has given you the choice, the ability to choose between these two ways. Then Allah says ifla hemmens, aka rockethub and this the person who makes this key a purification and growing the development of that self, then these people will be successful
and whoever neglects it, and doesn't develop it and purify it, these people will be the losers. So it's your responsibility. That's your main responsibility yourself, yourself. And whatever Allah gives you in this life, you have responsibility to deal with it. So if it's a calamity and disaster, you have responsibility, you can't run away from it. You can't blame anyone for it. And you can't play a victim. If it's a calamity and disaster, your responsibility is to handle it with patience. That's it. When you handle it with patience, you put yourself in the driver's seat, you hold the controls,
when it's a blessing from Allah subhanho wa Taala. The way to handle it is to be thankful and grateful to Allah subhanho wa Taala to be grateful and thankful and never transgress never use it. Something bad is something displeasing to Allah subhana wa Tada. That's adopting a sense of responsibility. And that you see this blessing coming from Allah no one else that puts you in the driver's seat as well doesn't make you slave to anyone.
And when it's a position of obligation that you have to fulfill, if it's an obligation you have to fulfill, then the sense of responsibility entails that you do whatever you are supposed to do.
You fulfill the commands of Allah, if it's something Haram, you leave it, if it's something, if it's an obligation, you do it.
If it's halal, you have choice about it.
That's how you take responsibility for your life.
And don't let anyone don't blame anyone, for anything in your life. And thus, you will live as a leader in your life, unless you will start to take control of everything in your life. So your worship your relationship with a las panatela doesn't depend on your upbringing, it might contribute. But at the end of the day, how you relate to Allah is your choice and your responsibility. If you decide to make your childhood color the rest of your life, that's a choice you made. And you will deal with the consequences of that.
If you decide to make conditions around, color, your whole life and your relationship with Allah, and what kind of a spouse you are, what kind of a parent you are, what kind of a child you are, what kind of a worker you are, what kind of a person you are, then that's a choice conscious choice that you have made. And you will deal with the consequences of that. There are so many people who went through similar conditions, but you will find people taking divergent ways. When you take responsibility for your life, everything changes, everything changes and moves in the right direction.
This is one of the main things that once it changes everything else changes as well.
As what Allah Subhanallah mentioned in the Quran so many times, it's your responsibility. It's your life and this is what Allah will make you stand in front of him on the day of judgment and will question you about this trust. Because you are able to choose, you are able to choose animals cannot make conscious choices about their lifestyle.
Even angels cannot make choices about their lifestyle. They cannot only humans and jinn. And that's the test. That's the test. So decide to make take responsibility for everything in your life, even if it's someone else's mistake. Take responsibility for it and you will see you will put yourself in a very powerful position where you can take the lead in your life and make good choices we ask Allah subhanaw taala to help us take care of this
Just that He has given us a llama Philomena with me not obviously me know what mostly metal here even Ahmad Ahmad alarma Filipina, I don't know when I was laughing Marina with a bit akademin on sadhana lol como cafe de la bella attina. for dunya hasn't eaten waffle accurate, he hasn't eaten joaquina has happened. Now just one thing, which I noticed, sometimes speaking during the hotbar is held on by the way, you cannot talk during the hotbar you lose the reward completely. As the prophet SAW Selim said, You speak during the hotbar you don't talk to no one in the hotbar you don't speak at all. Otherwise, you lose your word as the prophet SAW Selim use the word for Joomla completely
user reward. Number two people play around with their phone during the hotbar you will lose your reward as well. You will lose your reward people messaging checking their newsfeed and so on and so forth. You're wasting your drama, don't do this. It's only half an hour so you can abstain or you can
wean yourself off your phone for this half an hour. It's It's It's an obligation to listen to the hotbar regardless even if it's in a different language that you don't understand, you cannot play around with your phone. So focus with what the Imam says and be patient for this half an hour and don't lose the award for your Juma Subhanallah
formosana Marino hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen