Parenting & Self-Confidence

Ismail Kamdar

Channel: Ismail Kamdar

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Episode Transcript

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Somali Kumar rahmatullahi wa barakatuh Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam ala rasulillah. We begin by praising Allah subhanho wa Taala. And asking Allah to send his peace and blessings upon the final prophet Mohammed bin Abdullah Sal, Allahu alayhi wa sallam, and all those who follow his way with righteousness until the end of time. So today, I want to talk about just a segment from my book best of creation and Islamic guide to self confidence. The book is available on different websites and the different names but if you get it from the link, I'm going to mention below, you can get it with 10 videos explaining various segments of the book, those videos are not available on YouTube, they

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are exclusive to my online course on self confidence, as well as to those who purchase the PDF version of this book online. So I want to talk today about a segment in this book where I speak about parenting, and effects that has on self confidence. Some parents are unaware of the impact they have on the confidence of their children. So for example, many parents think that, you know, parenting is about being harsh and being mean and, you know,

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shouting or scolding a child when they do something wrong. But a lot of them feel like it's wrong for them to praise their children, it's wrong for them to say nice things to their children. Are they afraid that if you do, too, they're going to boost the child's ego? Right? So what happens here is, the parents are confusing the concept of confidence, with the concept of arrogance. So very big difference, confidence and arrogance very big difference. But a lot of people are unaware of the difference. In fact, in the book, I have an entire chapter on the difference between confidence and arrogance. Because in my youth, I do not No, I did not know the difference between the two. And one

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of the reasons I was so low in confidence when I was a teenager, and in my early 20s, is because I thought confidence was a type of arrogance. And so instead of trying to build my confidence, I always ended up putting myself down, right. But these two concepts are not the same. Confidence is about, you know, having trust in the abilities Allah has given you. This is what confidence is, like, I trust my ability to speak, to teach to right, because these are abilities Allah has given me

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arrogance is where you think you are better than somebody else. So it's not a matter of thinking that I'm good at this, it's a matter of thinking I'm better than everybody else. That's arrogance. Now there's a fine line between the two. And many parents are unaware of this fine line. As a result, many parents instead of children's conscience, confidence, they crush it, trying to get rid of ego, they end up crush confidence. So they never praise the child. If the child does something good, they find something to criticize in it.

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They see the child is getting excited that they have a skill, they're good at the subject, they, they're good at something they put the child down, he tried to put him in his place. As a result, that child grows up without any real confidence in his or her ability to do well in life. And this really crushes their potential to live up and be the best versions of themselves. And so what I'm trying to say here is if you are a parent, please make sure that the way you speak to your child builds their confidence in Allah subhanho wa Taala and in themselves, right that you speak to your child in such a way that you build the confidence so that they do not just become people who are

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confident in the ability to be good Muslims, confident the ability to live a good life, but they excel they go beyond, you know what, what you imagine them capable of. And the only way for them to get to that level is if As parents, we parent in a way that builds confidence, not in a way that crushes their confidence. So if you want to learn more about self confidence from an Islamic perspective, please read my book. It's available on the link posted below with 10 extra videos explaining certain segments of the book as well as a free workbook with activities based on the book. So for just the price of one ebook, you're getting two ebooks and 10 videos. So you can check

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out the link below to learn more about that and I'll be posting many more videos about self confidence and management all the books I've written just after a failure of Salaam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh