Maintaining Family Ties
Channel: Ismail Kamdar
File Size: 22.62MB
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the bus that you just recited is a bus that many of us are familiar with. Many of our footpaths begin with.
But do we often take the time to think what is this verse about? And what is it calling us towards?
This is the opening verse in Surah Nisa, in which Allah Subhana Allah says, all mankind, be conscious of your Lord, who created you from a single soul and created from a spouse, and he created from there many men and women, so be conscious of Allah, whom
Allah will ask you about it,
and be conscious of your family. Indeed, Allah is watching over all of you.
Now, normally, when we discussed this verse, we discussed the first half, right? It's very common for us to learn about the first half of this verse, which is about the concept of marriage. And very often this verse is quoted, when we are talking about marriage vows to focus on the under the later part of this verse, the part that we don't discuss as often we are left with the head that tells us what the whole wall punches of Allah will or harm and be conscious of family. Right? This is the part that often gets missed. Allah subhanaw taala is commanding us to be conscious of our family. What does this mean? This means that we must be conscious of maintaining family ties. And that's the
topic that I want to discuss today. That
as we continue on the series about Russia, about the compassion and mercy that is expected from the believer, it is very important that we discuss the concept of Rahim family ties. In fact, the word Russian family comes from the word love.
The Arabic word for family comes from the Arabic word for compassion and mercy. Why? Because the standard model of a good family is a relationship of compassion and mercy. Whether it's with one spouse, whether it's whether one's children, one's parents, one's cousins, one uncles, whoever it is, the default is
maybe in exceptional circumstances, we may go away from them. But the default interacting with any family member is so Allah subhana wa Tada. He named this family concept of his rock by the city they have these bootsy mentioned in other movement of the earth man, even over the long haul, some of y'all are full of lungs, at least on your own, all of us our job. So ability management also reports that he heard from the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam that Allah said, so this is a good scene in the region, what Allah said, What did Allah say, Allah subhana wa tada said, I know enough man, well enough Allah.
I am man and I created family. I am alright man, I created rocking this concept of people being together in a compassionate United State, a family. So Allah is already connecting the concept of Rama to his two family, he's been our man, because he's our man because he's perfect in his compassion. He wants us to experience this amongst ourselves. And this is why he created family and did a lesson had to us is that it is derived from mining. So just know that people don't have other theories of where the word Rahim comes from Allah says in comes to my name, Allah, Allah is our man, our relationship with each other should be a relationship of Rama. And then Allah Subhana Allah
says, For money whatsoever was sold to woman. But whoever maintains family ties, I will maintain ties with that person. And whoever breaks family ties, I will cut off from that person. So Allah again, links His mercy to how we treat our family, that if we are connected with our family, that alone would be difficult if we are the cause of the breaking of family ties, and then we can expect that Allah will treat us in the same manner. He goes back to the Hades.
We mentioned last week and the week before, whoever does not show compassion will not be shown.
And so compassion begins with our family. And we live in a time where everybody's for themselves, everybody's interested in only their own bottom line their own pockets, everybody is only interested in whether they are able to get ahead. And so we see very, very common in our communities, people breaking ties with their own parents, with their own children with their own siblings, sometimes not walking for 10 or 20 or 30 years. This is a major sin. It's not a minor sin. It's a major, and we will discuss this in a bit more details in the second football.
But first, let's understand the importance of maintaining family ties, and how we can go about doing so in other hobbies. And by the way, there are so many hobbies on this topic, so many of these, because this is something that is central to our religion. This is so central to our religion, that in the early days of Islam, when a man came from outside of Moscow, to marker to ask the Prophet log, he says, Who are you and what are you calling to? He said I am a prophet and calling to the oneness of Allah and to maintain It's a family case. When john Foley Bobby told him he was asked by the Johnson, what does your profit quality he said he calls the oneness of Allah and the maintenance
of family ties. When heraclius asked the leader of the courage I wish to be, what does your profit culture I was too young, who was not even a Muslim yet said he calls to the wonders of love and the maintaining of family ties. Notice in every situation, Islam itself is made up of two things, though heat and the maintenance of family ties. And this is why throughout the Quran and Sunnah you will find the rights of parents, the rights of the spouse, the rights of children, the rights of your cousins, the rights of your uncles, the rights of your grandparents, it goes on and on. Family is central to our religion and showing another piece and I shall
calling us on the face of our will do a ceiling. For us, I will shut up the pool button above you or do
any ration round even larger and is a slight weakness to it, but nonetheless is acceptable. The prophets will always have stated that the good deeds to which you will receive your reward fastest a kindness and maintaining family ties, meaning the kind of good deed where you get an immediate reward in this workflow. If when you are kind to someone and when you maintain family ties. Again, he said, the kind of sin that brings about immediate punishment, quick punishment is injustice. And the breaking of family has two major sins that bring about the law quickly, being unjust to others, and breaking family ties. In another generation.
It is narrated again, by I shall let you know that the prophets voice of sin that Rama or Rahim Family Ties is derived from Allah, even the name of Allah, for Allah, wa sallahu wa su ever maintains it, Allah will maintain ties with that person. Well, mitochondrial Hakata who love and who ever breaks Family Ties will love will break ties with that person, and one last generation. And this is a very important one, which we don't talk about enough. They generate a bit autograder the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, the other level may become mad, the sooner we can
learn about your lineage, enough to maintain family ties. Learn about your lineage enough to maintain family ties. Because the maintaining of family ties, it creates love between people, it increases wealth and increases lifespan. And I'll come to that second point. But later for the point I want to discuss now is learn about your lineage. This is something that's becoming a lost art amongst the younger generations, all the elders in our community, they know how everybody is connected. And sometimes the youngsters laugh at this. But this is nothing to laugh about. The prophets Watson is telling us to learn about our village. Because if you know you're connected to
someone you know, you don't have to make a family type person. If you know someone, your second cousin or your third cousin, you know you're connected. And by the way, everyone is connected because everyone are the descendants of Adam and Eve so that but once you do with the connection realizes that certain persons uncle and your grandfather were brothers or something like that you now have the abusive tweeking family tied to that person. And so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he commanded us or he advised us that we should learn about our military, learn about our families, so we can figure out who is closest to us who is related to us and we can reach out to
them and maintain family ties with them. So
How do we go about maintaining Family Ties? What does it mean? Islam doesn't give us a specific set of tasks on how to maintain family ties. This is left up to us, it's left up to the local culture. In some cultures, it's it's done in certain ways and other cultures is done in other ways. So, in our modern culture, for example, one of the ways in which we can maintain Family Ties is perhaps to have a group chat, right on your social media, for all the family members, where you can exchange messages with each other, so that you're always connected, right, you're never disconnected. And another way that we could maintain Family Ties today is to have family reunions. Now, obviously,
during this crisis, we can't have that. But once the crisis is over, and we go back to normal, have a family, you just invite as many relatives as possible over for no reason, just so that everybody's together and everybody gets to know each other, and everybody stays connected to each other. Give people a call. If you haven't spoken to someone for a few weeks, or a few months, give them a call. Ask them how they are. Right See, check up on the follow up on them. There's no specific way of doing it. The main thing is that you are reaching out to people, the main thing is that you are making an effort to make sure that your family feel connected, your family feel that you care about
them. And how far does it go? How far does it maintain its Family Ties go? It goes as far as you can possibly take it. Right within reasonability. So for us who live here in South Africa, many of us have a lot of family, right to determine, to reach out to as many of them as possible and be connected with as many of them as possible. At the very least obviously your parents, your siblings, or your spouse, your children, your grandparents, your grandchildren, whoever that circle, that's obvious. Like there's no there's no question about maintaining Family Ties here. But beyond that, your uncle's, your aunts, your cousins, these are people we should be maintaining family ties with
as well. And you can go beyond that as well with second cousins, if it is within the realm of reasonability. So it's not a it's not something where Islam has placed a set set of laws, that this is who you make it, I feel this is who you don't have to, and this is how you do it. And this is how you don't do it. It's left up to culture, it's left up to being reasonable. The main thing you all need to think about is have I heard any of my family members? Have I made any of my family members feel unwanted or have I been uncompassionate to a member of my family.
These are the things we need to think about. And then we reach out to the individual. We talk to the individual we reconnect with the individual, and in this way we strive to maintain family ties. And finally, we end with a worldly blessing. A worldly reward for maintaining family ties. Under Sybil Malik narrates that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said might have a user does a movie and he will use the heat for the essay.
Whoever would love to have a lot of money and a long life. Let them make him family.
The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, Whoever wants a lot of money, and a long life, let them maintain family ties. And I have seen this in my life. I know of people who have walked into poverty, and who have spent their entire lives trying to maintain family ties. And those same people today in the 70s and 80s are still with us and the extremely wealthy and they are living a good life. A lot foods is promised. This is a promise of Allah, that the worldly reward for maintaining Family Ties is a while will bless you with a long life and work abundance of reason. And so this is a worthy motivation. But really, our motivation should be beyond this. I want innovation to be for
the pleasure of love. Our motivation should be to align our minds I do want to be a person of roadmap, we should have other motivations as well. But nonetheless, there is nothing wrong with seeking this motivation. Otherwise, the promise was and would not have mentioned it in the hobbies and commentating on this Hades, Abdullah, even Roger law and who went further and he said that whoever has consciousness of Allah myth magnetize they will experience a long life with a lot of risk and accepted deeds. And so he added two things. I'm sorry, he added one thing to this. It's not just the maintain it's about the taste, but maintain It's a family ties with
it, somebody can Oh, I just have to repeat family. So you still have to be a good listener. It goes back to the verse we started with what the hula. And after that was have done to have a love and maintain family ties. Abdullah even says the same thing. Whoever has done what Allah and maintains Family Ties will receive this reward. So let us do our best to reach out to our families. This is part of the compassion
The Islam demands of us. This is something that is needed especially now many people are isolated to us due to the lockdown or due to being in quarantine or being in hospital or having lost their jobs. Let's reach out make sure that everybody is okay make sure that people are managing and make sure that they feel cared for this is part of being a good Muslim. This isn't just the rights of our family. This is the right of it believe another believer. So the hang around is that the Almighty Who was
111 111 Watchtower was Salatu was Salam.
ala Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was shown with a warning that said to have
following through the lucky symbol Allahu alayhi wa sallam lie in the following gender pocket.
The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam said, the person who breaks Family Ties will not enter
his head. He says in Sahil,
this is an authentic practice. And this is a very strong warning to all of us understand that breaking Family Ties is a major sin. And very often, we break Family Ties over minuses or things are not even simple at all.
But the breaking of family ties itself is a major sin. When you look at the list of kabaya things which are unacceptable in the sight of Allah, this is something near the top that is the fact that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam has made such a strong statement about it, when he said
the one who breaks Family Ties will not entertain them.
This is a warning towards one. And this is something that's becoming very common in our community, where you meet people who have not spoken to the sibling for 20 years or 30 years, when you meet people who have cut off from the children. He said he's not my son anymore. People who have cut off from the parent saying I want nothing to do with him anymore. And for no fault on the other person. Yes, obviously, if someone is abusive, and if someone is violent, then you're going to maintain a distance from them. And Allah does not ask us to go beyond what's reasonable. But very, very often, we are cutting Family Ties for the most
unacceptable reasons in the cycle.
And another these, the main reason why people cut Family Ties is mentioned and is very sad. But is it true even in our times, for another hevc Prophet salallahu alaihe salam said that, on the day of judgment, the earth will vomit up all of its gold and silver, all of its treasures, all of his work. And then the murderer will look at this vomit and you will see accused people for this. And then if we look at this, well then you will say I stole from people for this. And the person who broke Family Ties will look at this and say, I broke ties with my family for this.
Think about this for the city. So he Muslim Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is listening. People who break family ties in the same category as murderers and thieves. So it's a major sin, just like murder and stealing. And not only is it a major sin, like worthy and stealing, but very often the reason is the same. People often murder for money. They steal, obviously for money. What's the main reason for the breaking of family ties, someone wants all of the inheritance. Somebody wants a family business. Somebody wants a family house, someone's jealousy the brothers business is doing better than them. So same thing, same thing, it's Monday. So Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam is
wanting us for anyone who has broken family ties and because of worldly reasons because of money. On the day of judgment, it is going to be a cause of severe regret, you are going to see all the treasures of this earth vomited out of the earth and you're going to notice that it is completely completely worthless. And the person that broke down the title that they will ask will ask himself the complete regret. I broke Family Ties for this
story I mentioned last week and the week before but it again it ties in all the subjects compassion family maintains a family ties in so I have to bring it up one more time.
When I showed up and her was slanted, one of the main people spreading the slander was her cousin. And her father aboubaker was taking care of this cousin financially because he was a immigrant from Makkah who came to Medina with nothing. So Abu Bakar is taking care of this youngster who is a distant relative of his financially
and this young slang is used
Welcome. So Abu Bakar says I will never give him money again. Allah reveals a verse in Surah Lu, and you can open the Quran and look at this verse yourself. I love the view the verse addressing aboubaker, say, forgive and overlook, don't you want to forgive you? So if slander against one's daughter is not a good enough reason to break family ties,
how can we consider money, or you can do things like he married the girl that he wanted, his brother wanted to marry, or, you know, he got a bigger house, or he got a better job, or whatever it is, that people get angry with each other about how to be considered these good reasons for doing family ties. Understand that in this case, the person who Abu Bakar, you wanted to cut off cut off his money supply was a family member who committed a major sin, the major sin of slander.
But still a lesson for giving the family forgiving over them, that's your family. And so I call upon all of us to forgive and overlook our parents. Reach out if there's a family member who you haven't spoken to for years, reach out, give them a call, ask them how they are find a way to connect, find a way to rebuild this type of brotherhood. It may be that somebody is on the, you know, on the brink of losing their mind to depression, because the entire family is isolated from them. And you're one call saves them. You're one call, save the money save their life, and it saved the mental health. So the end with the Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, in which he said, Lisa was in
medieval garb, he was putting Ebrahim.
He said the person who maintains Family Ties is not the one who maintains family ties with his nice relatives, with the family members who already be nice. He said the one who maintains Family Ties is the one who reaches out to the person who cut off ties.
You want the reward of maintaining family ties, reach out to those members of your family with cut off ties. Even if they don't give you back even if they don't give you
know they don't reach back out to you or they don't want to connect with you, you will still get the reward of being the one who make effort. And you know, sometimes it's difficult and there's a lot of emotion involved. And I know some people genuinely have good reasons for distancing themselves from family members, someone may be violent, somebody may be abusive. In those cases, Allah then asked us to do anything beyond what is reasonable, you'll maintain the distance. But still remember that the family will still be good to demean you in the best way that you can possibly be. You don't have to be close to them. You don't have to be hanging out with someone who you know is violent, right? But
he's giving him a call once a year or once every six months or something to let him know that you're still there for him if he needs anything. And so we ask Allah to help us all to maintain our
families, biggest blessing from Allah but also the biggest testament. In our families, we have the people who bring the biggest joy to our lives, and the people who bring the biggest difficulties. And this is not just for us. This was for the province as well need to destroy the majority of the story that the poor are the people who struggled with the impact whether it was with his wife, or when he would do Elisa with his son or whether it was
his father, or use the peninsula or the brothers. He would have been difficulty in dealing with family is a test of life that same for everyone from the very beginning of time with happiness.
And so we ask Allah to unite our hearts We ask Allah to forgive us our sins We ask Allah families to help us you may need them because when to stop the heart, broken ties with others, and we also love to accept this guy must have been allowed to have his name nesina
probably not around when I was a Mila my grandpa was a whopping learner
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running. Super Hannah Robin is in the hunger Yes, he was alone in other words