The sacred relation of a husband and wife
Channel: Ikram Sanaullah
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one alesund with the ammonia Allah who call for them to nivia sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Ashura seen in pharma poly ofin kottu walima sanata Allah Allah sanata so the government of the wasa karasuma, we will carry on da da da da da da Amina shahidi. No Welcome to rely on me.
Respected one of my dear friends and my beloved elders in Islam.
The religion Islam gives attention to each and every aspect of the believers life. from social to personal, whether it is as personal as personal hygiene, Islam talks about it, Nabi sallallahu, alayhi wa sallam used to teach the Sahaba how to use the toilet, how to keep oneself clean, and whether it is as social as interacting on public level. There is a lot more violence used to teach that as well. So Islam teaches it all. And nubby Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam enlightened us and we get to learn from his life, that the rise of Allah subhanho wa Taala and the rights of the creatures of Allah subhanho wa Taala were given priority at his time. That is why we see that in his
time and in the time of Sahaba in one light Allah know much more in the Islamic Society was dominated with care and courtesy for each of us to care for each other a lot.
Why? Because we saw some thought about the rights of Allah, and the rights of the creatures of Allah.
Forget about the rights of human beings. Forget about the rights of animals.
Even the plants trees were given top priority when the Sahaba used to call it in the path of Allah novoselov alanson used to teach them that don't start cutting the trees. Why? Because the tree provides shade, and it gives benefit so don't start cutting. Now this was the condition and the time of Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam May Allah subhanho wa Taala forgive us today unfortunately, forget about the rights of trees. Forget about the rights of animals, even human beings are deprived of their rights to Allah subhanho wa Taala forgiveness amin
and that is why I have decided to talk about the rights of women in Islam.
The relation of husband and wife so now everyone seated here is a husband or a son or a father or he might be a husband tomorrow inshallah. So now what are you supposed to do as a husband? And what does Islam say regarding you? And regarding that relation, husband and wife,
you see when Allah subhanho wa Taala created other money so now we all know the story how Allah Allah created other Muslim and that Allah made a statue of other monosol Okay, statue with a center
and the statue stayed there for 40 years. And the angels kept looking at it. Every day they would pass by they would look at the statue and they would ponder and they would ask Allah and then allow and reply to them that I'm this is this is one of the creation His name is going to be Adam. So for 40 years the statue still stayed like that there was some kind of a tada put soul in other malasana Okay, then other la Salam was left in Jana to enjoy by himself.
Now, even hawan a salon was created late on our mother. We all know Omar is the wife to other money Sarah, whose mother or father, why didn't tell us to create Hawaii with anomalisa
the way that Allah created Melissa, why didn't Allah create? How are they strung together with other malasana the allama mentioned that when other money Salam was alone in gender,
and he felt lonely, he felt the loneliness. Allah subhanho wa Taala made him wait
understand the value of a woman in a person's life for us to understand.
So Allah tala created hawala, Salam later on and you know how he created her.
Other Muslim was sleeping.
And then when he woke up, he found Hawaii Sonam next to himself, Allah, Allah.
Allah, Allah created hawala, Salam from the left, we have other medicine on left side, the left rip of other medicine and when he woke up, he found her body Salam next to him. And we all know about Yusuf Alayhi Salam that he's the most handsome man in the history. We all know that Yusuf Ali Salaam was the most handsome man.
How are they Salam was the most beautiful woman. A very Sarah was what was the most beautiful woman? So when he saw her, he became happy. Now the question comes, is it when we do something good? Which one do we use? When we are eating? Which one do we use? Right? And when we put on a watch, right, and when we go to the toilet, which one do we use? left? Yesterday we were seated with Mona was
Mona Morris. And he said that he was taught by one of the other scholars when he was mixing sugar in the tea.
He went in the clock way he was going towards the left side and someone told him that no Mona, you should be doing it on the right side because you're doing something good, you will be drinking the tea. So when we do something good, we use the right side. But now Allah created how on the left side, what does that mean? She's a disaster.
No, no mercy. The left rib is close to the heart. So the status of a woman is supposed to be in your heart.
That is where a woman is supposed to stay. That is where your wife is supposed to say. That is where your daughter your sister, your mother is supposed to stay close to your heart.
And so that is how hawala a salon was created. And other money salon became happy. The other reason why Allah tala created a salon later on, is because
when other Melissa was created was created in front of angels. But hawara Sam was created separately Not in front of angels, which shows that a woman is supposed to have modesty in her life. She's supposed to hide herself from it.
So my brothers from this story of other Muslim and Hawaiian Hassan, we learn one day, that the first relation which was created on the surface of this earth was the relation of husband and why there was no father, there was no mother, there was no son. The first relation which was found on the surface of this earth was the relation of husband and wife. And tomorrow when when everyone is going to die, the only relation which is going to remain is what you're going to be in general with your father.
You want to stay in general with your sister,
with your wife, you're going to be staying with you, why every person will be staying with his wife in general separate. So the world started with the relation of husband and wife and the world is going to end and the relation which will stay is the relation of husband and wife. So we understand from this that how sacred and and there's so much virtue in this in this relation. First midwife and to support this to support this. Allah subhanho wa Taala revealed so many verses in the Holy Quran, and there are so many things already Mohamed Salah la vie de wasallam when you have to look in Quran, there is a verse it says one min Aya T and holla callicoon min unphysical as Virgil liters
kulu la ha wa Jalla Bella tomato Rama, it is from the signs of Allah that He created for you, your spouse, your wife, or your husband from amongst you, in order for you to achieve love and mercy. Then when you go down, Allah talks that it is from the signs of Allah that Allah created skies it is from the science of Allah He created the heavens, he created the earth, He created the trees, but the only relation which comes with huaming, IRT, he is the relation of husband and wife. There is no other relation mentioned in this way in the Holy Quran, that the relation of father and mother is from the signs of Allah, the relation of son and father is is from the signs of Allah no way you
will find in the Quran. But when it comes for the relation of husband and wife, it is from the signs of Allah and you are supposed to ponder then Allah says in the fee that he cannot tilicho me at alpha karoun you know what it means? Allah say
To say, Don't you understand this? Don't you understand that it is a relation and it is from the signs of a cop
and my brothers,
when it is a sign of Allah and it is a bounty of Allah, when you get married, when a couple gets married, there are certain responsibilities upon you responsibility of your in laws, responsibility of your parents responsibility of your children, responsibility of your wife, and these people become the first class citizens of your heart and you are supposed to take care of them. And the greater the bounty, the greater the responsibility there is what Allah subhanaw taala is trying to say, today, what happens is that today when a couple gets married, unfortunately, physically, they have grown up. But mentally they are mature. And that is where the problem starts. If I don't want
to spend time with my family members, if I don't want to spend time with my wife, then why did I bring that into my kneecap?
If I am ashamed of going out with her in the market, then why did I marry her? Imagine if someone has to do that to your daughter or to your sister, or to your mother? Would you like it? You wouldn't say simply no. Then how can I do this with someone else's not?
My brother's Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam with all his responsibilities. Is there anyone here who can say that? I have more pain of oma than me, Mohamed Salah. Is there anyone who claims that? No one can say that the pain which is the result of some help for this woman? No One No One can no one had it and no one will have it in the future. Yet he showed to us practically how to stay with the winds.
You see, the critics will always raise point and they will raise a finger the fact that no longer is an unmarried 11 women. But they will never tell you why he why he married 11 women. It was to teach us that we saw some married a woman who was younger in age then he he married a woman who was elderly in age than him. He married a woman from another tribe. He married a woman from the same tribe. He married someone who spoke the same language he met someone who spoke a different language in order to teach us how to stay with these people to teach us and we find it from the lifestyle of novoselov bothersome how he used to stay with them. You see when he said a lot while he was in a
game. And he started giving his teachings to the people around him. The Arab culture was such that they used to be ashamed of expressing their love for their wives. It was like heresy to say I love you
that the culture was so shy, one service associated with Sahaba.
In a survey asked the Prophet of Allah Who do you love the most?
And he said Allahu alayhi salam replied Ayesha.
Who is Ayesha, the wife to be sent along. So he said I love Ayesha the most. Everyone was shocked that a leader saying he loves his wife
also wanted to teach them that yes, they also do have rights.
Then, you see the dose was not the dose was quite heavy. They couldn't manage to swallow it. So they asked again, that okay, who next? After Ayesha, who's more beloved to you? What was the
person? He didn't say Abubakar? He didn't say Abubakar. He said abou ha I shall his father still I saw his name was mentioned that I love ashes father the most after I shop, which again shows his love for eyeshadow.
So he taught us we are supposed to express our love to them. So having loved ones novoselov is gonna be seated with that Ayesha. And he says to other to Ayesha, in hula, you have we know Allah Al Mo, in ui tuki zodat de fille agenda, or Ayesha dying has become easy for me, since I have known that you are going to be my partner in gender waterlines I shot since I have known that you're going to be my partner in Jenna. Dying has become easy for me because I was informed that I shy is going to be a wife in general. So he says to it since I've known you are my wife, dying is not an issue. Do we ever say that to our wives? We say that you know what, you are meeting me in this world. Please
on the other side, stay away. I want to stay with food.
We say that our love is sometimes our our reply is so vague, like this man who was asked by his wife, how much do you love me?
How much do you love me? And the men replies that your status in my life is like that of a SIM card in the phone.
You in my life is like
Getting the phone without a SIM card a phone is of no use. When you don't have a SIM card in the phone you can't call someone you can't interact with someone. So I became very happy that Mashallah my husband loves me so much that he said that I'm unlike a SIM card in the phone. When she went away he says to the friend he whispers in the ear of the friend that she doesn't know I have a dual phone. I can put two SIM cards inside. And if it's a Chinese phone, you can put four SIM cards if
that is the kind of learning we
have taught us practically that no no. We are supposed to express our love to them with sincerity and we were supposed to show it to them.
Once the viscera Lavalle wasallam was on a journey. We turned the eyeshadow the yellow Talon and all the Sahaba now this was not some ordinary journey like out on a trip holiday vacation. No, they were out in the path of Allah and other Ayesha dlo Talon ha lost her necklace.
So she complained to the Prophet of Allah and Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So Pamela started looking for the necklace and commanded on the Sahaba to look for the necklace of his wife, great Savas like Abubakar Omar man. And they are all looking for the necklace of the wife of Nabi Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Time went by our son McGreevy shot Isha and they are still looking for the necklace night has come they didn't find it during the day how are they going to find it at night? So now we said hello what are some commanded the Saba that we will be spending our night you know at that time the revelation for tire moon was not revealed at that time there was only Who do
you know tell moment who the right when you don't find water. You can use the sense make will do make them and then you can perform Sara so at that time there was only Voodoo there was no tail move. Allah tala didn't reveal any verse regarding that. So now all the Sava started getting in Why? Because the water was finished. And they were in the middle of the jungle and they were worried about the future Salah so they all went complaining to Abu Bakar because of your daughter, we are going to miss our Solano we can take Buddha What should we do as an approver? Can we get more angry? And he goes to the room have had that Ayesha Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was resting in the
lives of other
yellow talana no other worker wants to get angry on Shabbat he can't get angry because
he's sleeping. So this is what he did.
Because of you, we won't be performance enough. So that I shall have that I shall mentioned this, that he came in he pointed at me and he was angry. But then Subhana Allah, Allah tala revealed the verse for them. When there is a situation where you don't find water, so you're supposed to make them that is when Allah subhanaw taala revealed the verse one of all the Sahaba went back to Abu Bakar. They know who Makkah because of your doctor, we got the bounty of them. So now again they started praising as a Thai Sharia law. But now what we are trying to talk is that later on when the necklace was not found, or that I shall say to the Prophet of Allah, the prophet of Allah, that is
move forward. When the camel stood up the necklace was under the camera, but look at 197 now why do some different way Look at the learning issued for them, upon one occasion,
have sheep someone from Ethiopia came to show like a circus, a drama, and other Tasha was young and she wanted to see it. So she said they're a prophet of Allah, I would like to see this. Now there are a lot of people standing there. So Nabi sallallahu, alayhi wa sallam said that I shall come, you can see then we shall go by yourself went and we should learn this, or that I shall stood behind. At first I was on foot like this. And then I was leaning yet on his shoulder, and she was watching. Then we saw some dietary change the side and then you lean to the side that I shot was watching from then the results of Casa de Janeiro Ayesha, is it enough that I should say no, I still want to
Now who's this, this is an ordinary person like me, and you know, this is the Prophet of Allah, doing this for his wife. This is the love he had for his wives and we are supposed to show the same love and concern for them my brothers. Today unfortunately, being in the eye and I say this in the most humble way, being in the line of social media. We have the broadcast list we where we take out messages where we interact with people from different places on daily basis and we receive messages while liking we have received a message from a lady who said that my husband uses the word divorce as a weapon on me
Every time I don't do something you want to say do this, while depot's do this all diverse ways that humanity makers is this being a man, we said a lot earlier Some said, that person has no good in Him who has to raise his hand at his wife, he has no hair in it.
And my brothers, when we show them love, and when we express our love to them, and when we show affection in the house, we have to understand that there are two outcome to this. If there is peace in the house, there is love between the couple, the contribution towards the society will be a useful one how, when there is love between husband and wife, the child is watching.
When the child goes out, it will preach peace.
But if there is chaos in the house, your contribution towards the society will be poor.
Because the child is looking at the chaos, hearing the chaos in the house on a daily basis, when he goes out, he will become one of them. And that is how we will understand life.
And then our contribution to the society will be a very poor one microts very poor one.
And when a couple stays with love and muhabba a society stays with love and
and there are many issues, there are many issues, which are raised and which are discussed.
For example, one of the major issue is that the women complain that men are not praising us. Women are created that way. Once in a while, we should praise them. Even if the food is not tasty. Sometimes you have you there will come a point where you will have to say that are hamdulillah The food was tasty.
But make sure when you do that the food is from your own house. Because it shouldn't ever like that man who once had a band like this, that you should praise your wife and you should praise the food your wife makes.
So he went home that today I'm going to praise my wife. So the food came and he said Mashallah, the food was so tasty. And the wife started crying.
So he got shocked that What's the reason? Why are you crying? She said that 12 years I have been cooking for you. You never pressed my food. Today the food has come from the neighbor's house and you want to praise it. It shouldn't happen like that. Make sure the food is from your house when you praise the food. We should praise them we should compliment them. We should smile at them while we still have these teeth. And when we grow old smile with the dentures as well but smile at them. The other issue which we normally get to here, I don't know about Malawi but in Zambia, there is this combined family system where the parents and the children are staying together. You see this system
is very beneficial. If every member of the family knows Dean and understands Sherry, it is very beneficial hamdulillah but if a single member doesn't have Dean in him, he doesn't have the knowledge of Sharia then it's a complete disaster. It's a complete disaster.
Now husband keeps complaining that you know what, this is my mother. You should respect her. You should serve her.
My brother You don't know what happens at home when you leave for work. Sometimes they say Mother is showing hell in the house to the woman nappy Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that till the age of seven Don't even say the word Salah to your child.
You have to teach your child about Salah after the age of seven to the age of seven. Don't even utter the word Salah. What does that mean? Give that China's so much love so much love that after the age of seven when you tell him that get ready to be sacrificed for the sake of Allah. He should be ready like Haji Ali Salaam presented the challenge my nanny Sarah, but today our mothers are unable to do that. Because there's so much politics going on in the house that she can't fulfill the responsibility which is supposed to
do to the politics taking place in the house and the combined family system.
So we should try and give them their privacy. Try and give them their time. The other issue which we keep hearing
is that husbands are not giving time.
At little late night they want to sit with their friends they something wrong if you are giving priority to your friends over your own family members. Now be Mohamed Salah you will never
hear that episode of love is concerned with other men and
Abu Bakar at two o'clock in the night, you will hear that he woke up with a halogen. Then he went with the Sava to the graveyard or to do something constructive. You will never heard it which says that even after Isha Levison was chilling with his friends never.
We should try and give them time. And when a couple has an argument amongst themselves, they should try and sort it out within the room. They should try and sort it out within the room. Why? What happens today is that the moment the husband brings the complaint forward, or the wife brings the complaint forward to her parents, we start taking sides.
The the parents of the Father, the boy side say that our boy is always right. And the parents from the girl's side say that our girl is always right in if you have to look in the lifestyle of lobbyists or a law firm, Nabi sallallahu Sallam never interfered in the matters of his daughters never never ever once. There is no love and he was someone was in a room with others, I Shara de la butanna and other w Barker was passing
and he heard a song, which was like an argument between the visa holders and other eyeshadow the along talana.
And he and he he felt that the Asha is raising her voice in front of my visa. So I went there, and he had monisha that I shot the yellow talana and he blasted her
to such an extent that hasn't actually logged on and has started crying. What do we learn from the story that has the double burger or the low dollar we interfere? But it was to rectify his side. It was to rectify Akasha was the daughter to Cooper karma. He didn't start fighting with Louisa.
It was to rectify, he said today, we don't want to interfere in the measures we are supposed to interfere. We clearly know that my son is being oppressive to my daughter in law, we won't interfere I will say that no, these are the matters of ladies, this was the they should sort it out amongst themselves. And the matters where we are supposed to not interfere will interfere what is supposed to be cooked in the house who is going to have the key for the country. That is where we start interfering. So my brothers these are the major issues we have to keep in front of us. And we should try and bring the lifestyle of Nabina Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and my brother's the the
solution to all these problems lies in o'clock. The moment we have good conduct in statics in our life, every problem is solved. Or the tomorrow the toddler always used to say now the veranda can continue to gradually be ladyfish allottee It shouldn't happen. the solving of a man who's performing touchwood at night should not deceive you. It shouldn't deceive you why, in the regular regimen at the amanatullah money tamanho woman cinema Muslim una melissani where the certainly a complete man is he who is trustworthy and who does not have others who is a complete man who is trustworthy and who does not harm others. It shouldn't have it shouldn't happen that we are busy
performing turgid Salah we are busy feeding 1000 people every month. But on the other side our clock is so bad that tomorrow on the day of karma, Allah subhanho wa Taala is to catch us. Allah subhanho wa Taala protect one and all. Allah subhanaw taala give us the ability to practice on whatever has been said