Ibrahim Hindy – Coping and Thriving
AI: Summary ©
The speakers emphasize the importance of patient behavior and continuous engagement in life, as well as the need for continuous engagement in life. They stress the importance of understanding and embracing the Sch airline's life, finding one's own success in difficult circumstances, and finding one's own success through connections and friendships. They emphasize the importance of positive self-study and negative thinking in achieving success, and emphasize the need to focus on one's own control and not let things happen in their control.AI: Transcript ©
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woman you know the Lenovo fella had yella was hadoo Allah Allah Allah Allah who will actually Kedah ye shadow and Mohammed Abu who are solo out of Salah hula hula rock Mandela Alameen wa coldwater meaning one Mahajan, the Saudi King, were objets Angela Reba the edge money in an hour Allah who begin recording wasabi his pseudo warfare to hobby he Aryan and army and then some Morocco lugar OLFA for LA Mugsy he hired Ahmed just eaten a Vienna no matter what as soon Ananda what he what he said it
was SallAllahu was it robotic it while he was heavy. Were either Jimmy or a medicine episode let him walk Jeff VSAe laomi Dean and my dad for OC comm one FC we talk Wallahi to Allah for in there who may Attila Elijah Allahu Amok Raja ye resort calm in high school I tested all praises due to Allah alone. And when we seek aid and assistance into him we turn both in repentance and for forgiveness. Truly him Allah subhanaw taala guides and then can mislead and he whom Allah leaves to go astray, There is none who can guide and there was a there was nothing worthy of worship save Allah alone.
And that Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is both his servant and His messenger.
Allah subhanaw taala throughout the Quran
reminds us and instructs us and encourages us to be amongst the patient was Bill first fill in Allah ma Sabreen. There's over 100 verses
in which Allah subhanaw taala commands us to be patient, to persevere, to be amongst the patients.
Well, this shit is Sabreen give glad tidings to those who are patient and persevere. Olivia either also habits when musi veteran called when and Allah who are in your
genuine, those who when tragedy strikes them, they say to Allah we belong to Him we shall return.
And Allah azza wa jal commands us will stand over Sabriel Salah rely and seek help upon patience and prayer.
Submit is one of the most important characteristics we can have.
And too often, people think about some adult patients or perseverance or resilience.
They think about it as
a passive action as something that is done to you, rather than something that you're actively engaging in.
If you tell someone be patient, what they envision in their mind
is to remain seated upon their hands.
When you say Be patient, they think what you mean is to not act.
But that's not what Allah subhanaw taala means when he tells us to be patient.
In fact,
when you think about this concept of patience, you see how Allah subhanaw taala places it within everything he has created.
You see how the child grows in the womb of his mother, not all of a sudden, but it's a process.
You see how the plants grow, not all of a sudden, but through a process. You see how the sun rises and how it sets. You see how Allah created the heavens in the earth in six days, though he could have created it in one day, he could have created it in the blink of an eye. But he let it go through a process.
That's what summer is to us as humans. It's something it is a process that we have to actively engage in, throughout our life.
And this is why the Scholars say
canal duniya with Dean more Roberts was southern. The perfection of someone's Dean over dunya is connected to patience.
If we want to succeed in our dunya,
in our finances, in our careers, we have to go through a process of studying
of trying and failing of trying again until we achieve what we want.
All of that is the person being active, the person persevering, the person being resilient.
Likewise, in our deen, the person has to do the same. They have to struggle they have to strive. Sometimes they will fail they will fall into sins, but they try again and they try again until they achieve the deen the connection to Allah subhanaw taala that they are seeking
today's chutzpah
I want to speak about
the characteristics of being the people of patience, the people of resilience, and in particular, when we have difficulties in our lives, how do we deal with those difficulties? And how do we become even better after them? How do we thrive after them?
The first point
is to understand what is a person who has sub
and this is not everything of what this person is. This is not all of his characteristics, but what are some essential characteristics in a person who perseveres and a person who is resilient.
The first characteristic that too often people ignore and don't pay attention to is that they understand
that suffering is part of life.
They understand that hardship is part of life.
And they do not personalize the hardship or the suffering that they face in their life.
We all seem to know this anymore.
To many people
fora are entitled, they think that they deserve a certain kind of life.
And this often emerges out of ego and narcissism.
We think we deserve a certain kind of life. We deserve certain kinds of parents, certain kinds of friends, certain financial standard in our lives. We deserve a certain
level of life. And if we don't get it, we feel bitter. We feel resentment.
All of these emotions start to hamper our ability to cope and to thrive with the hardship in our lives. You will notice that Allah subhanaw taala.
Often he reminds the prophets and the believers of the hardships that other believers faced in the past. We'll call you an upper Swati come in and Rosalina and we have b2b for ADEQ. Allah says, and we relate to the stories of the messengers before you for what reason?
Why is Allah giving us the stories of Yusuf Ali instead of the stories of more liberal him, man is a b2b for that which makes your heart firm.
When you understand the other people suffered to,
that allows you not to personalize your suffering. This is not personal to me. This is part of life.
This hardship Allah put up my door. It's not personal to me. It's part of life, the life that Allah azza wa jal has given His creation.
Look out for double the long run, the companion of the prophet who was tortured by his owner,
she would bring the hot stealing iron, the hot iron, and the rods, the iron rods that were burning, through, take them out of the fire, and have men hold him down. And she would bring his back all the way along line.
And he went to the Prophet sallallahu he was hitting them one day. And he said Allah to Allah,
Allah to stand standstill. Relena Will you not make dua for Allah for us? Will you not ask Allah to give us victory?
And our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam got upset with him.
And he said to him, indeed the people before you
suffered even more.
And the Prophet brought him examples. He said they would bring them in.
We will leave her in Elisa, Adi and sit down. They said they would bring him and they would comb his back with iron rods until the flesh was separate from the bone.
He said, Well, I can now come to strategy. And he said, But you are being too hasty.
You are being too hasty.
We have to go through a process of suffering
and overcome it, and thrive in order to succeed. But when we think I am deserving of something, I am entitled to a certain kind of life. And now it's been taken away. Then you overcome yourself and bitterness, you overcome yourself even with anger against the loss of $100. All you have to understand is this dunya has suffering. And part of being in this dunya is facing suffering. And part of being a servant of Allah is striving through that suffering.
And it's not personal to you, but that by going through it, Allah azza wa jal is elevating you.
The second characteristic of truly patient persevering people, is that they know where to focus their attention. They know what is in their control, and they know what is outside of their control.
Too many people they think you're the sky is falling.
We're in a recession.
What's happening to the prices of houses, what's happening to our wages, what's happening to inflation.
These things are largely outside of our individual control you and I cannot sell them. So what should we be focusing on?
The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said in the corner to sell Tessa will be here, the facility in Philly of Risa. He said if you see the Day of Judgment begin in a coma to sow the Day of Judgment.
has become established. What does that mean?
That means you see the mountain crumbling into dust.
That means you see the heavens and the earth being torn apart.
And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam tells you in in your hand,
there is there's a seed, a plant seed, what should you do? He said fully over his hair, let him planted,
let him put it in the sand and planted is that seed ever going to sprout? No, judgment is coming.
But you still do it. Because this is what's in your control. This is what will give you good deeds. So do what is in your control. Don't worry about what's outside of your control. It is not in your control whether the Day of Judgment starts or not.
What's in your control is the good deed in your hands. So planted.
This is the attitude of the believer focus on what is inside your control, do not focus on all the things outside of your control. So people can spend their night
talking about Philistine and talking about this country in that country in the politics of this country in that country. And there can be some benefit in this no question.
But what is inside of your control?
What can you tangibly do to help focus on that thing?
Then focus on all the things that you have no control over?
Yeah, When
are they coming full circle, all you will believe
upon you is the responsibility of yourself, deal with yourself. Now you will recommend that a datum, they will not harm you, those who are mis astray. If you are guided, focus on what's in your control. The third point of those who are truly
patient is that they do in your house.
And part of that hassle, that self reflection, taking yourself to account
is that you ask yourself, are the things I'm doing in my life helping me or hurting me?
If I'm stressed out about the economy,
does it make sense for me to read 100 articles about the economy? Is that increasing my stress? Or is that decreasing my stress?
Is it would arise for me to spend hours on social media?
Is that increasing my anxiety? or decreasing my anxiety? What are the things that I'm doing in my life? And what is helping me deal with the problems versus what is just increasing my stress level and not actually helping me? This is also part of Maha Sabha where we take ourselves to account. Yes, we look at our actions or deeds or good deeds or evil deeds for sure. But also look, where's your time going? Where is your energy going?
Where are you putting your effort and your energy and your attention? Because these things impact you?
And truly patient, people will analyze their day and their hour and say, Where am I putting it?
Where we said in the beginning, we want to know how do we deal with problems? And how do we thrive out of them become better because of them.
So let's talk about this. But first, think about something in your life that happened, that stresses you out.
Maybe you got negative feedback at work. Maybe you got fired.
Maybe you're a student and you got a really bad mark in your test. Maybe you failed your test. Maybe you're a parent and you have problems with your child that is stressing you out. Think about a moment where things were negative in your life. Think about a time where you are going through a very difficult situation. And then ask yourself
What did you do in that moments? How did you react to it?
How did you deal with that situation? Ask yourself this question honestly.
Because if we were honest,
you will find that almost all of us have similar experiences.
We start falling inside of ourselves, sinking within ourselves, falling into those negative emotions inside of ourselves.
And that's natural when something bad happens.
But we have to ask ourselves, what do we do to deal with those situations so that we don't stay stuck in those negative emotions that overcome us.
Somebody can get fired from their job
Are and they feel really bad about themselves because of it. And their ego takes a hit. And they feel those feelings and that's natural. The problem is when we stay there, when we all get overwhelmed by those feelings, so how do we come out of it? How do we overcome that? How do we cope with it? The first point is finding what's in your life works for you, to calm you down. And for the believer, so much of this should be in the book of Allah subhanho, wa, Taala
and Lavina either I saw that one was Seba, Allah says those who when tragedy befalls them, this is Allah is definition of the patient people. Well this should stop him and Lavina either also a veteran will see that when the tragedy befalls them, what do they do? Follow in Allah he were in the elite urology room. They say we belong to align to Him we shall return. They remember Allah subhanaw taala they make the call of Allah azza wa jal, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, when he wanted to pray, what did he tell me that or the Allah one at the higher VLAN bring this comfort or be that this was a euphemism for our prophets who told me that make the events so we can pray?
They found relief in their prayer. I Lavina alimento talked to her in blue polo boom, what when we won't be the killer, those who believe their hearts find contentment in the remembrance of Allah subhanaw taala NLB the delay that we know Kuru, indeed, in his in the remembrance of Allah that the hearts find contentment. Another thing that helps people is having righteous friends, good friends, as Messiah, the righteous friendship, matter how they learn from love, the Prophet salallahu Salam says no to love each other for the sake of Allah, except that the best one amongst them is the one who loves the other one more. So having these righteous friendships, taking us out of isolation,
these are things that can help us overcome a difficult circumstance. The second thing that helps us overcome negative situations, is understanding that the situation is not permanent. What you're going through will not last forever. If you got fired from your job, that feeling will not last forever, and inshallah you're going to find another job. If you're going through a problem with your child, it's not going to last forever. And sha Allah will be eased in the future. Whatever difficulty in your life, it's not going to last forever. The whole dunya is not permanent. I guarantee your problem is not permanent.
And the Prophet Allah subhanaw taala says in NEMA anniversary, you're strong indeed with hardship, comes ease in the nav tells us and after hardship, verse ease.
So whatever hardship you're going through in your life after this is coming. So the difficulty you're going through is not going to last forever. It's going to pass. And the third point is what our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to us,
but they'll want to
know me for it together. Okay, whether the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, if the person were to say, If only I did this riff on the idea that these are the words of Shavon Shavon whispers in our ears? What? Why didn't she do this? Why didn't you do that? Why does she keep on saying this to us? Because he wants you to live in despair. So a bad thing happens.
something bad happens in your life. You spend all your time thinking Man, if only I did this, rather than that. If only I took this action rather than that action. Does that benefit you?
It already took place. It's already done. The past is the past. I guarantee you there is no time machine to take you back.
What's the point of thinking constantly if only for me, I O for me. This is a pod whispering to you to make you do what to make you live in despair. And the believer understand something
now saw in the mouth saw that the meconium stack that whatever has afflicted you was never not been afflict you
and whenever has missed you, whatever has not affected you is never going to flick to you. Whatever happened was always going to happen. You're always gonna get fired. Your child was always going to have this issue. You're always going to have this problem with your finances, whatever it is, it was always going to happen. It was written by a wise soldier. So stop while moving over if I did that, or this or that, and instead we start moving into the next step. This is how we cope with the problem. How do we thrive out of the problem? Number one, you create learning opportunities. So we don't worry at all
If only I did this or if only I did that, that doesn't benefit you. But you know what this helps you. If you ask yourself, What can I do better in the future? If I, if I got fired from my job, what can I do better in the future? What can I do to choose a better job next time? To avoid companies like this company where it wasn't a good fit in it? What can I do to make sure that you know, my boss is a good boss? What can I do to work harder in my job, so I do better next time? What can I do moving forward? That's good for me. That's in the benefit of the believer. You ask yourself, What can I do to be better? The next point is to implement positive self talk.
And this might seem a little silly to many people, but it's powerful. What do you do?
Let's say you want to
get better at a certain skill. I want to be a better public speaker, or I want to be better at building relationships with people.
Say to yourself in sha Allah, I will be a better public speaker. Say it to yourself over and over and over again. incorporate it in your drive, or Allah allow me to speak better, or Allah give me eloquence, oh, Allah, untie the knots upon my tongue, oh, Allah, allow me to be clear, when I speak, make this dua over and over and over again, because you are placing in your mind this thought this idea so that it becomes a passion and it becomes a desire and it becomes a drive. Athletes do this all the time. Athletes sometimes will write down on their hand or one, they will tell themselves I already won. It says I'm the winner, I'm for sure I'm winning. Why did they do this, they're
implanting this idea in their mind. So then it ultimately becomes part of their character. If you're playing Whack a Mole load to IRA, he said, the author on how to feed them to solids to crawl, fancy coffin and to file solid, solid Shaohua for hiring, harassing them to find solid as email him, when they come to the site. It's fair on them when them to, to do
it, he's a long speech. Now he's talking about negative deeds, he said repel the evil thoughts. Because if you don't say evil idea will become a desire and push back against the evil desire. Because if you don't, it will become a passion
and a determination.
And if you don't repel the passion and the determination, it will become an action.
And if you don't stop the action, it will become a habit.
At that point, it will be extremely difficult to change. And he's right. He's right. But you know what he's most right about the fact that when you have the idea, and it sticks in your mind, ultimately it becomes your thought it becomes your passion, it becomes your action, it becomes your habit and your habits are who you are, you are your habits.
And so, if we want good things to happen in us, if we want to become good,
then do the opposite. Put the good idea in your mind, I will be good at engaging with people in sha Allah will be good at this Oh Allah helped me be good at this, it becomes a font, then it becomes an idea and then it becomes a desire and a passion then it becomes an action then it becomes a habit of yours. But you got to start by putting it in your mind and this is what self talk is about. Inshallah I will be good at this. Think about things in a positive lights, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam can a or gebouw and optimism would be something that Prophet salallahu alayhi salam liked, he loves this to be optimistic, be positive, I will be good at this. Instead of telling
yourself I really struggle with this. I'm really bad at this thing. No, say I will be good at it in sha Allah.
And the final thing I will say
is refocus. When you go through these difficulties and your hardships and these hardships in your life, we focus on these negative emotions are being felt, refocus, and ask yourself questions like, How much is ALLAH blessed you with? How much great things has Allah put in your life? If we constantly think of ourselves as being low, we will do things that are low. We think of ourselves as being honorable, we will do things that are honorable. So we focus take a moment. We assess what's happening in your life. When you're going through difficult moments, and think about the things that you need to do in sha Allah to benefit yourself up we'll look at how the last of all you would have
to suffer through anyone.
Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam ala Rasulillah he or Sahibi woman wala just two very
Three important announcements. The first is that the time change is happening this Sunday. So the prayer times are going to change this time for Jim the art will start 1245 Next week, instead of 130. It will be 1245. And the second GNR which is the eclipses in Arabic will start at 145 in sha Allah so 1245 and 145 being Allah will be the new timings as of next Friday. Every year somebody comes after they come late and they say what happened? So I'm telling you now and the better we'll make an announcement afterwards 1245 from 145 Next week, second point, inshallah is please fill the gaps in the stuff when we come to pray. Too often brothers are telling me there's large gaps in the
prayer when we stand up to pray, please fill them up being the law in the law home Allah it gets always alone and maybe you know Amazon, what are you sending what's Nima? Allah will suddenly will send them aniseed you know whenever you know what have you been a Muhammad Allah Most Ludhiana Mohammed Malika Kunal Abrar are suddenly it hiragana Macedon, schemata Salviati Jordana salatu salam and de emila Naomi Deen while he was hardly even upon hitting while on that mean, ya know?
When Allah Mala to diamond a female formula hadn't been in love Africa where there hadn't been in love for a while I'd love for data when Emeryville illustrator when I moved to LA Frita. Well how determine how I entered dunya will arrow here look at either one and a fee or surah in LA Carlito, so turbulent Mexico, hammerlock Amin along Marrison Islam when was the mean? Where are they before they can even have the deen bobina Iman was able to kubina We're currently in in in California for SoCal Roseann or John nemenhah Russia Dean in the lineup model but I didn't realize anyway to the point about why and when in fact che on Macari would rather listen to the Quran was called Live
commercial where anime has it come what is the coli Ebola Haryana mudstone Abdullah from Sana?
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