Haifaa Younis – Ask the Sheikha!

Haifaa Younis
AI: Summary © The host discusses the importance of accepting the "will" of Islam and avoiding negative emotions. They stress the need for people to act in a best way and finding one's own happiness through everyday activities. The segment also touches on the "hastag economy" and the importance of finding one's own happiness through everyday activities. The speakers emphasize the need to acknowledge one's own feelings and not give too much information. They also stress the importance of finding one's own happiness through actions and finding one's own happiness through everyday activities.
AI: Transcript ©
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Smilla Salam aleikum.

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Salam Alikum

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Smilla and Hamdulillah. So that was another story lo Allah Ali he was talking with a woman whether la Muslim Now I am found on file now Bhima Lim tena in Nikka Simeon would you would dua la Manyara will be coming in and Milan for our Albania show I want to say that a shower Do you smell from vanilla to Sao Paulo whenever there is had a tuna or have an amulet and Kurama in the country will have or be shortly so three ways Sully, Omri Wyalong, the terminally semi of Cabo poly Welcome, everyone. I made it different today. It's just because of the number of the questions we are getting. Wherever I go, SubhanAllah. wherever I travel, there's always like, can we have a question

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answer? So I opted to do this. And I'm going to take one from I can't tell you how many questions I got. And I was like, Did I make a bit major mistake, but that's okay. And then so I actually many I chose different topics in different categories. Right. So I'm going to share with you so if in in between the moving from one question to the other. If I if you have any questions from the audience, because actually, it shouldn't be it is your session. Let's put it this way. But a couple of the question, most of the questions is very relevant. And I loved it, because almost all of them came from woman. And it's related to us, woman, and family. And I'm gonna read with you a couple of the

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questions. I was like, wow, I got a question from a 14 year old is probably going to take all of all of that class. We're going to try be evenly left to make it once a month. So we can continue with topics and then once a month, we will do it questions and answer with Mila. So let's start with the first one. First one is very common, actually. And it says the following. There is no name. And I don't know, even if I have the name. I'm not going to read the name. So the question Salam Alikum Rahmatullah. How does one, cleanse their heart, from hatred for someone who does wrong to them day in day out?

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Then she said, I promised myself every day that I will ignore and forgive this person for the sake of Allah. But I feel every day because something new happens. It really doesn't matter what this person does. What What matters is, this is what I loved about the question.

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Let's see, if you will feel what I felt you said, doesn't matter what this person does. What matters is, I have failed Allah again. And all my good deeds are being eaten up by this hatred in my heart.

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I loved it. That's why I put it number one harder question.

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I feel immensely burdened by this. And it saddens me that I am not the better, bigger person to completely clean the state and forgive this person. Please advice? I don't know how old Where is she? I just got the email and the question. This applies to all of us.

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Nobody in this room, nobody on with me online, nobody in this world have not lived

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time. If not repeated time, or someone have

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bothered you.

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Did an act of injustice to you. Truly not your perceiving. It's real. Right?

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stabbed you in the back. disappointed you. So this is what I said when I read this. I say welcome to the world. And this is why this life dunya is dunya. So we all have to accept it. Number one, especially I'm talking to the young because you're not yet Subhanallah I wish I was your age, but I didn't know anything. And everybody was beautiful and nice. But the more we grow up and it's part of the work and part of life. So this doesn't mean okay, Hollis, you do this to me? I'm gonna hate you.

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This is what I say to myself before I will give you the the answer. And I actually some of these answers I really researched.

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Number one, what is the difference between me and everybody else?

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This is really important for you. Where are you? with Allah subhanaw taala.

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It doesn't matter. I'm not seeing everybody. I'm talking between me that's why I loved the second part of the question, which it doesn't matter what this person does. And again, I don't know he she who is that person? But it is every time I feel Allah, what is she looking at?

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She's looking at her relationship with Allah. That's where the starting point should be for everybody.

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Once you start seeing people it gets very difficult, almost impossible. I really mean it. It's always whenever something good happens to us from through people. Or here we are. The first thing it has to be two things. Why Allah allowed this to

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Nothing happens without the will of Allah right? When you say just actually go higher Allah allowed it. When you say you're the worst person I have met Allah allowed it. So the first question is Why did Allah Allah which meaning what does he want from me? What does he expect from me? One two, how should I act in the way pleases Allah? Neither pleases me, nor pleases people. And this is where this this verse in Surah Tasha and I highly recommend all of you memorize it like your name.

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And this is Allah subhanaw taala after he praised the MaHA during the immigrants and unsought the helpers, he said, There is people's going to come afterwards. This is you and me. Well, Adina Jha, whom embody him, they came afterwards your Karuna Ravana kulana de nobuna. Look at the sequence. Number one, yeah, ALLAH forgive our sins. What does that mean? I probably have done this. Maybe I didn't do it intentionally. I am sure I'm hurted somebody, I'm not an angel. None of us are both we usually what happens we don't see our

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faults. We don't see our mistakes. And if someone comes and tell you your mistake, that's when you know who you are. How do you take that mistake?

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So number one, I will say Allah subhanaw taala allowed and then what does he want from those who comes after odia coluna Robina Furlanetto noteburner You Your Allah please forgive me forgive my sins and not only for me I'm not selfish. When he one in Edina Sabah Kona believer, and everybody that came before me, believers. Now comes the point because the question is the feeling in the heart. Well, after John here Colombina religion will fillerina Armineh

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the Allah don't put it in our hearts. Really. It is not only anger and hate, it's a combo. It's malice. When you that when you see that person, she or he, you really don't want to see them. And everything inside you changes. And he said I don't want to see her. I don't want to see him. And then if any word comes in, what's the response will be immediately you have to say or have been allotted your article without him letting your Allah don't put in our hearts hatred to anyone just because they are what? Believer. This is what the verse said. It doesn't matter.

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that not all believers are Angel. Not everybody does. Perfect, right? So number one, and this happens to me and I'm sure it happens to you and this verse, literally, like you put anesthesia on it.

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Immediately you look at this person and say Robin alotta trochlea Colombina Reenen livina ya don't put your begging Allah, you're turning to him. This is an act of worship, you will be rewarded, I will be rewarded

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laughter geography Colombina villain Medina don't put any hatred in my inside me. Doesn't matter what they did. The other verse, which will help you not only clean your heart, but also makes sure he act in a best way

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is when Allah subhanaw taala said it to say networker

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and you all know the story when he said he was accused, and then who surprised? The rumor. Now imagine you live in here. And everybody in town is talking about you. Nuts, negative in the worst case scenario. And you are the daughter of Abu Bakr and the wife of Rasul Allah He saw it was Sinha who spread the rumor who said did you hear text share was his relative. His relative is poor Ensign Abu Bakr always spent on him. So here the scenario is the same number but didn't do anything.

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Anything on the contrary, and this man out of weakness,

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just surprised me how many times we say things and you say why did I say it?

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And then Satan, Abu Bakar Naturally, this is his daughter. So that's it. I'm not spending a penny on this man. Fear or not?

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Fear or not?

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And Allah revealed the verse in Surah to know well, I tell you from the Miko massarotti Are you too old? CORBA well Misaki no one more hydrography Siberia Firefall was Fahad here this is the million underlines far for was for Hope How can I do this? Yeah, Allah, Allah to hit buena El Faro Hola Hola. Hola. Hola for all right. So what Allah is saying is saying those who have wealth and Allah has expanded their sustenance, do not.

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Do not stop

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up spending specifically this is a no boubakeur Do not spend thus stop spending on those who are poor and they are immigrants for the sake of Allah and then what will make me do it

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now this is very easy said this is not easy done I mean think of all the scenarios

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and Allah says fast food was for her hit two orders came to him for given partner for give meaning I'm not gonna retaliate and I am not I'm going to try to avoid you first for who there is nothing in your heart

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and in general I will respond even better

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what a heart I need. Honestly, right what makes me do it the next in the verse Allah to her buena Farah hola hola

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Don't you want Allah to forgive you?

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And I say this to I remind myself all the time because we all go through this how many times you're in me and show me hands? We have disobeyed allah

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how many times right just today don't tell me the number did he kept feeding me

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gave me all the things brought me in here brought you here price tomorrow will be inshallah even better.

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And as to have buena Farah Allahu La Puente Don't you want Allah to forgive you? The answer is that's what Satan Abu Bakr de na Robbie, he made to talk to Allah, Bella Warabi by Allah he has, and he not only spend or reinstate the payment, you know what he did? He gave him even more.

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So this is this case has two parts parts is made internal. So this is what you have to do. And this is not going to be a day or two, this is constant. And then in your Salah in your DUA, you say this dua clear my heart if you don't know the if you say clear my heart, don't have don't let my heart have any grudges hate on anybody. Now, second, this person is day in day out.

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Try to avoid that person as much as you can. Again, she didn't explain what is the relationship. But if this is a friend, absolutely pull away. They don't they will not change. You need to reach a point where you accept people the way they are. It's very hard, by the way, because you still have expectation.

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Avoid as much as you can they text you respond with one word, respond, because it's actually sat down and wrote to sit down. But minimum one word, don't argue don't try to explain. It's going to get go nowhere.

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It's going to add.

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So again, I don't know him. I don't know. Imagine this is the parents. Imagine this is a child. Imagine this is a husband or a wife. In an obvious what she said they or siblings.

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So try to avoid as much as you can. And a lot of Doohan, may Allah make it easy. Again, it is not easy whatsoever. But Allah makes things easy.

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This is a very tough one took me a while to answer actually, and I'm going to read it. This will hit hard for many of you. How do you suggest managing a rebellious teenager?

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wait to hear a 14 year old who's currently anti anti everything her parents likes, most importantly, Islam.

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She complains a lot when we take her to a stomach lectures refused to wear hijab in those settings. Do we start taking her? That's the first question. She doesn't want to associate with the Muslim kids in her school. So she doesn't even try forming relationship with them. We are new to the area so she doesn't have a lot of relationships yet. We have tried arranging get together with Muslim families with girls the same age as her. So far, she has not clicked with them and is suspicious of our motives in inviting them. Now background I'm glad she gave that before moving here. She had a couple of Muslim friends whose families are much more liberal than ours. He didn't give me detail.

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We live in an area for work with much smaller Muslim population and moved as soon as the chance to a larger metropolitan area in hopes she makes front.

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I for now that's the model for now I backed off on directly mentioning Islamic things to her because she thinks all I do is lecture

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and I am just working on strengthening my relationship with her as a person. Now mother feeling

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I feel so sad

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Add, because I have tried my best since she was a baby to expose her to Islam from Sunday school with the Islamic classes, learning Arabic reading Quran and Islamic children books in home, listening to nasheeds making our holiday fun and festive and education. Unfortunately, she is very attuned to what's outside society things. And she has picked up on the strains of anti Islamic sentiment and the situation. Do you have any specific suggestion what to do?

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Deep breath, right, exactly. That's how I did when I read it.

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I'm not gonna look here, it says, How many of you are not just kidding? This is very, this is very normal.

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It's very normal. I can't tell you how hard it's becoming. For both. For the parents and for the children. Don't you think it's only hard for the parents, it's very hard for the children. They really want to please their parents, but the pressure on them, it's very hard.

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And I'm not defending them. But it's real. It's real. Just click on tick tock

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and see what they see.

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The pressure, even IG, there are all these influencers, right? Everything is against us now. Everything is against us now. So what do you do?

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This is couple of things I said, I'm not trying really to think hard. Number one, I'm just going to start from the from the end, the the result of the children is not in your hand.

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That doesn't mean it's okay. These feelings are the result how the children will grow up, how they will turn is not in my hand or yours. You really have to live with this. Because the way we are attached to our children, part of it is because they are my children.

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So when people bring a negative comment about the child, you know who gets hurt first? The mother Why?

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Why? Because I raised her.

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So as if they are criticizing me, we need to move away from this. The children the anger is not in your hand Satan, no Hassan is careful. And so even Abraham, his father, Raska.

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So number one, and you have always, literally in everything we do, the end result is not in my hand. Like I prepared all this and you all came in, Allah allowed it could have been that Allah will not allow this will not happen. So that's number one. Number two come to the reality. This is a 14 year old, which the hormones are on the peak.

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Very sensitive. You do remember when you were 14? Right? May Allah help our parents? Yeah, I mean, we are we are adults, but we are not adults yet. Right? We think we know. And I'm not putting them down. But we all were 14 years old. We think we know reality. We don't know. Right? But we think we know especially these days, everything is available. I go and read, and I say it

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and also specially living here. Girls, especially more than boys, the issue of identity. Who they are, I'm not talking about the other identity. I'm talking to them. Are they Muslim? Are they non Muslim? Are they practicing? Are they nonpracticing? Where do they fit?

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The last couple of times when I'm with the youth here? That's the commonest question comes out.

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fit in.

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This is what this girl is trying to do.

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How easy it is you go to a 1000 school 1000 Students school and everybody looks at you and make fun of you. What can you be?

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The reason I'm saying this, I'm not defending the girl but I need parents mothers to understand this.

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This is not back home when I knew you go to class, everybody is you and me. And we still had issues. This is us probably the only one.

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So what do we do? Number one, you come to this not comparing her with you. And what you were those days, it's not those days, not even 10 years ago, 10 years ago was much easier. I'm sure you all know this. If you have children who are like in their 20s now and you have teenagers now we think this is a different century.

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and are easy to meet to serve. And may Allah make it easy for this mother. She needs to be very patient

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and don't respond and let her leave her. Don't push her the more you push the more she will go away when do you intervene? And you have to be very vigilant also. Because 14 years old is when people start

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doesn't know exactly right from wrong meaning the real, right and then you are scared also, this is your daughter, you don't want her to go to the extreme wrong. Pull away a lot of dua. Don't you ever give up on them at all, and never win, especially when you get upset? Because you know sometimes how they respond. And when they response, you get so nervous, and you get so angry, don't you ever make dua negative because you don't know what en la and when Allah is listening, there is a very famous, very famous, he just died recently actually, he wasn't gender when I remembered I attended the Juma hotbar. About that.

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He was completely paralyzed.

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One time he really upset his parents, he lied, and they knew he was lying. His mother besides go, may Allah break your back.

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He went diving

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and he fractured his neck.

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And he was completely paralyzed completely from here and he became one of the best die

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because he always say it's my mother's DUA and the whole Juma Hopper was about don't do to our on your on the country or her lady. You know, we say this goal May Allah guide you perfect. Perfect. What do you want? Or when someone says Allah unique you say I mean, don't get upset. She just made dua for you. He said Amin, please Jambi. So make an honestly take it positive, make a lot of dua to your children. Now, number one, to me, number one, don't get upset anyone and especially the Ask the questioner, you need to be the example

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the role model and I'm talking about the role model.

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Your relationship with Allah has to be there, your dress code your Stan your Salah, right?

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That what is that doesn't necessarily mean she'll follow you. But at least when you make your DUA, Allah who will respond and you know Allah who never let you down, because you've turned to him and says, I did everything you want from me, not with the child. But with me and you.

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In case again, I don't know the woman but in case and we all you need to go back because this could be the sign that Allah wants you back.

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When Allah makes me go through difficult time, the first question I save, what do you what did I do? I don't blame people, what did I do? And show me your OB and show me what you want from me.

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So look at yourself, make a lot of dua

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keep reminding yourself, the end result is not in your hand, be very patient, pull back, pull back.

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A lot of these this age boys and girls, right, they want to do with their way. But also keep an eye because there's limit. You don't want them to go. But it is not easy. I had a friend of mine said I wish I can put them Don't laugh. She said I wish I can put them in the freezer from 12 to 18. I'll give them out.

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Like why 80 She said at least this is that which is true. This is the toughest time.

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So may Allah subhanaw taala make it easy and don't get I mean, again, it's easy said Don't get upset. The best way is to be their friends.

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If you are a person who the God comes to you when she has a problem, you're her friend.

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If she goes to somebody else and say Tell mom, then you're not her friend.

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Because she's worried What's your don't say when she comes to and says I smoked today? I vaped don't say is this is my daughter?

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Is this is what I and what people will say she will never say anything.

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Change your face. Don't say it's okay because it's not okay.

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Let's say let's talk about

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I know everybody doing it. You don't any be be clear. Be frank, this is reality.

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And let's talk about then she will open up to you.

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So it's extremely important to build a relationship with it and it doesn't come at 14 it comes to much earlier. And may Allah make it easy.

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Now this is a teenager question. And I put the title amazing teenager question. Right. So now I am 14 year old look at the opposite

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Subhanallah so that I am a 14 year old Muslim girl. And here are my questions for the Tuesday May 23. So specific I loved it.

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And there's many but I'm going to choose some so I can cover more. What should I do?

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If I like someone in high school,

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can I talk to him? He's a Muslim.

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I love the question. He's so sweet. If I have, if he's in front of me, I'll hug because he's so sweet. Look at the rest of the questions. So what should you do? How many mothers here have a 14 year old girl? Okay, what do you do?

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I don't know

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number one,

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number one acknowledge the feeling.

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Don't tell her you're still young.

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That's it You shut her off.

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Remember, I come to you and says I'm very sad why you're sad. Allah gave you everything

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right. She's not gonna listen to me. She brushed my feeding. You should say really? Wow. Subhan Allah. Okay, let's talk about it. So the first thing this when you say okay, let's talk about that. Don't say haram. We are going to join them all this Nine Yards named Johanna when it's a place

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number one identify I need more. More. I will ask more questions before I answer this, but just general number one. Why do you like what he's almost Hamdulillah 100 in

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But why? Why do you like

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what is in this boy? She is missing at home.

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She's 14 years old.

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Right? Probably Love or caring.

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Caring. It's not only love but it's caring. You feel somebody cares for you.

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So okay, and you say okay, come on in. Okay, so what do you like about him? Talk to her? Right? What do you like about him? Let's you and then you ask about the boy does he does he does he does he? How do you know you? Like

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analyze the feeling? Because sometimes we know I love you. We don't know what this even mean? So how do you like him?

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And then what do you want me to do? You ask him?

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As a mother? What do you want me to do? How can I help you? Don't say you're too young. Go you're gonna get too old. You forget.

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What are you going? What do you want me to do? Kenny, the most important thing is acknowledge the feeling and acknowledge the challenge.

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She is struggling? Why did she send the question? What did she say? What what do I do? Because she knows it is the beginning of something maybe not. Right? Right? Why do you ask this question? So can you always when someone asks a question, look at the positive in it. Don't look at the negative. Read it in between. Right? So he will say okay, let's talk What should I do? Again? I can't answer because I don't have a lot of details but I was like how are you communicating? If it is daily texting before I go to bed for two hours. Now we are slipping.

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We have to be careful. And what is the end result of this liking at age 14

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And the only thing I will say always ask Allah Subhana Allah I always say End Start and end with the Doha because he's the only one who is going to protect us and I will say you know what my beauty gone ask Allah subhanaw taala at this stage not to get too attached to anyone you know why?

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Because she will get hurt

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you know when you're at 14 and you get hurt Ouch.

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But in general, can she talk them within the school? Yes, but outside the school, preferably not. Because it will it will slip I have the same questions of how long 21 year old last weekend

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and she was studying much more but it usually starts by liking and then you know texting and and you get attached especially a swim and you get attached. So you need to also protect what I will do again and if she is hearing me I probably will say I need more more detail.

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You can the next one

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will lie I have not asked this question myself to myself. She said what do i Why do I feel? I am not good enough for Allah

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Subhan Allah

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How do you answer this as your daughter came to you?

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the first thing I will say about a caloric

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what you are looking for is what Allah think of you.

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Right? The question says, I don't feel I'm good enough for Allah meaning I have a lot in my life.

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And I have I am paying attention to where is my relationship with Allah. This is 14 year old. There's not you and me. And then I'm gonna say why

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You're not good enough for Allah. On the contrary, now you need to give a lot of positives, because this can go also another side another way, why you're not good enough for Allah? Don't you believe in him? Start with the basics. Don't you believe in him? Don't you worship him? Don't you see he's seeing you? Don't you see he? Don't you turn to him when you need something. Right? And then we come into what is the things you do for him? We get started with the basics. Right? Let's say she prays but I don't pray regular. Don't say, you're not good enough.

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Okay, then this needs improvement. We'll talk about it later. And then do you sin, you always but don't use the word sin? said what do you do? That you think you're not good enough to Allah? Let her speak. But always encourage them and always starts by saying nobody wouldn't be enough. Good enough for Allah. Not because we are sinning, but because what he gave us

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back when somebody is so generous to you, you say whatever I will do is not enough for you, as a human being. But this is very good heart to human being if I was her mother, and she asked me this, I'll kiss her head to toe.

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Because it's 14 and Allah is the most important thing to me. And I'm thinking what do you think of me? Subhanallah

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Look at this. This is very nice question. Same girl. What are some things that make me happier as a person?

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Isn't thinker by the way howdy. Honestly, she's a thinker. She thinks deep.

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What makes you happy?

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I will say as simple as ice cream.

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Right? cup of coffee.

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Anything that's halal. That makes you feel good. Do it.

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Jonnie Islam doesn't say don't be happy.

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Baby Daddy carefully of Rafa wireman management Allah who is the word for happiness, many times in the Quran,

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we are not an ummah of very serious. No, we are also a more happiness and celebration, what do we do and aim is going to come again next month, what do we do? Right we eat we drink we are with with

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the Islamic boundaries. So what makes you happy? In general, what makes me happy?

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Sometimes feeding sometimes doing things, achieving things and sometimes doing nothing.

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Sitting on that couch sipping your tea, or coffee, whatever you like. Right, exactly as you say.

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There's nothing I worry about. But in general, again, general answer to this question. There's so many things that will make you happy. And we're not going to give a lecture but look around you what Allah gave you, right? But sometimes you look at an animal and you smile.

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Right? And like two kittens are playing, right don't make you smile. So there's so many things, some most of us as a human being, especially if we are not only connected with Allah, but if we look at the real life, sometimes very simple things makes us happy. And the more simple things makes you happy, you are a simple person. Unfortunately, the more the more Allah give us happiness become

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moves further. Because we have it all.

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What are some look at this is again, her question, what are some productive ways to spend my free time?

00:33:28 --> 00:33:29


00:33:31 --> 00:33:32

He didn't say fun.

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Subhanallah I always say number one is sports. And this age at 14 lets the youth play sports. I mean, hamdullah we live in California, beautiful weather, you know, hiking and swimming for the girls in a in a girls setting. Bicycling, sports, play basketball, play football, or play soccer. In general, sports is the best way to spend your time because it will get out the energy makes you feel good and makes you feel tired and don't have time. For others. I see a lot of the mothers complain I take them from one practice to the other after that hamdulillah

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Al Hamdulillah because if they have a lot of free time, and they are on that phone, it can go completely number one. Number two, reading.

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Reading is really helpful. And it doesn't have to be something serious because the next question is, can I am I allowed to read romance book this girl between Allah and the wrong lens?

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So let's come to reading and then I'll comment on this question. Reading is a very good one actually. It's really any read anything you like, as long as it's within Islamic boundary because again, you don't want to read something affect you negatively. I'm not going to say go and read Quran every day. Can you every minute. Definitely make part of the reading is the Quran. Read about

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For example, I don't know if he's California read about California, read about when you see mountain in front of you read about X, expand your knowledge. And the more knowledge you have, especially as a woman, especially as a woman, you absolutely will, you will be looked at differently. And people will respect you more because she's a woman of knowledge. And knowledge is a strength for us as a Muslim. So reading is another one. Spend time with friends.

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person not texting, because this texting thing doesn't have the role. The spirit of it, let her go out with her friends, we all spend our time with friends. Free Time productive. For example, somebody was the other day saying how long they put the pictures. They said I don't give my children I think 1415 I don't give them very limited time for internet and phone. And then she showed pictures what they do Subhanallah painting some parts of the house doing any creative things. The creativity will will be I remember I'm not 1415 I love to paint so I used to paint something that will make you combine happy and productive.

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Last but not the least from this girl that was like about 10 questions. Can I wear makeup on special occasions? See this moment between Allah and between? A dunya which is fine. Okay, makeup on special occasions.

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Makeup to certain extent.

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Who What is this special occasion? Is it human only? Is it fixed? Is it extravagant? is you're going to attain attention? The answer is no.

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I'm not gonna say haram or not haram. Why? Because what does Islam usually do? As long as Islam is a proto? is I call it

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protective Deen. It's a preventive deed like in medicine. When we when we put the masks, why did we put the masks it's COVID. That's protection. Because what you don't want to get COVID when you get COVID It's going to be much harder. So this is how Islam

00:37:09 --> 00:37:31

you see Islam is all half of the Quran is protection. And prevention. Don't do that. Don't do that gives a car or if you steal, and you're then the punishment gets severe. So on special occasion. This is what a lot of my friends when they were there when I was studying actually, you know makeup is beautiful. And we all want to look beautiful, and there's nothing wrong with looking at beauty.

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But till I get to that occasion.

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What is this makeup? Am I Am I showing it in my beauty to everybody?

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You have to all put this at age 14 I will say yes with limitation. With very much limitation. I'm not going to go out and I am completely showing completely my beauty. But in general minimum, I put the makeup when I entered let's say to the house with my friends with no pictures or selfies, everything is online. Because now there is the point is invalid. You get to the house, you want to look beautiful, that's fine before you leave you wash because that's what Allah said. Now you have Dina's unit tahona meaning don't show your beauty in public. For your husband Absolutely. In front of Yamaha no problem. But in general gathering of girls young girls wants to have fun shooting, but

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not leaving the house or taking pictures or putting it on.

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And remember as a Muslim girl,

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as a Muslim woman, as us all we are example people look at us.

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So if I do some things that oh look, she is doing it then we are fine. And may Allah make it

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easy. It's easy said but this these daily things is not easy done. But Allah Allah Allah, Allah who, you know what I always ask Allah subhanaw taala. And I want you all young and old, when you love something, and you know this something is I wouldn't say not pleasing to Allah, but may end up not pleasing to Allah, you know what the DUA I do to Allah. I said, remove the love of this thing from my heart.

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So I don't have to struggle.

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So if you love something and you're struggling, don't say you're a B, or A B, remove it only from remove it from my heart. So if someone puts it in front of me, I don't care anymore, and then staying away from it will become easier. You're too quiet. No question.

00:39:32 --> 00:39:47

Fine. No question. Already? This is a fair question, but I'm going to answer it because I get it very frequently. What is the ruling of vaginal discharge and the woman does does it negate the model? And this is very practical.

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Why you're at work for 14 hours, right? So and you're a woman who normally again, do you have a lot of vaginal discharge? Well, every time that I have to because the question was

00:40:00 --> 00:40:20

So is negate will do and I have to change. Like if I'm sitting in 16 hours or I'm in college or I'm in class, but I am in the surgery coming out. I'm not talking about your home. So there is two opinions of it. One of them is the original opinion. And then there is a contemporary opinion based on the knowledge we learned in

00:40:21 --> 00:40:23

physiology and in anatomy actual,

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originally, the ruling, and in every book you will read is my origin, necessarily, anything comes out from the two openings negate model.

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That's the muscle they say, that's the base. So if I am home, I am home. And I have no problem. I go and change and make Waldo, then you absolutely follow this. Now the recent, which is actually one of my teachers who just passed away, may Allah give up the next dose. She was one of the first one who wrote a book about that said Medicine showed that there is a three openings. In fact, there is not two openings. Again, for anatomy, meaning, again, the higher funding just to explain, there is an opening where the urine come out, and there is an opening where this tool comes out. And there is an opening where the baby comes out. So in fact, there's three, the vaginal discharge come from where

00:41:14 --> 00:41:23

the baby comes out. The vaginal discharge, if you look at it in under the microscope, it's the same discharge that comes from the nose.

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So when they came to know that they said, Ah, this one is not Niger's.

00:41:29 --> 00:41:35

So if the vaginal discharge comes out, then it does not negate all the time. How do you combine these two?

00:41:36 --> 00:41:51

Because this is how we in our deen if you don't just say haram or Halal right away unless something is absolutely clear, there is no which is going to come later on. There's no question about so if I am in a situation where I am very comfortable, I can go and change and do my will take the origin.

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If you are in a state but don't be loose, Allah knows, if you are in a state where really changing doing whatever is going to make it very uncomfortable or let alone it's going to make you miss Salah then you to take the next one.

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Clear. I hope to quiet I don't know what happened.

00:42:13 --> 00:42:14


00:42:16 --> 00:42:16


00:42:21 --> 00:42:27

And if you are outside you cannot then you take it which means it does not negate will do. So you can go and do your sauna.

00:42:30 --> 00:42:58

If you take the first opinion that yes, it's just change or you wash? Or if you have that you change and the panty liner or or do you wash it? But if you take the second one, the answer is no. The only time there is no different opinion if the woman has it's a medical condition record in Korea, where she has continuously vaginal discharge continuous. This is you see it in this case, she doesn't have to change. But she's like the person who always bleed. So she needs to make Hodo before

00:43:00 --> 00:43:01

I ask somebody

00:43:03 --> 00:43:11

is it like gooey like it's about the clear vaginal discharge in the middle of the period usually happens the middle of the cycle.

00:43:13 --> 00:43:15

The same gooey stuff is the vaginal discharge.

00:43:16 --> 00:43:37

Now look at this one. This is very deep, beautiful question. Again, I honor her accent. We know that Allah loves our actions. While there is a lot of good people out there. And people look at things very differently. And in this Subhanallah we know that Allah loves our actions when we do them purely for his sake. True. Yes.

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But surely, we also have in our hearts the hopes of being rewarded through that action.

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That does does that hope take away from the purity of the intention? May Allah reward you? Did you get the question? So I'm gonna say your OB, I am coming to the class for you only.

00:44:06 --> 00:44:24

But I also want the reward of me coming was sitting, struggling. So is me looking at the reward negate the fact that I am doing it purely for Allah. Here to get the question. Very deep Subhanallah yes or no?

00:44:26 --> 00:44:28

Yes, we're in big trouble.

00:44:30 --> 00:44:32

Really? Yes, negate.

00:44:36 --> 00:44:38

Now you change your mind, of course.

00:44:39 --> 00:45:00

So why didn't you ask me in the beginning to repeat the question. I'm just kidding. But usually, if you are not clear, you always asked the question to be repeated. So her question is, were supposed to do the actions only for the love of Allah. Like what about I want the reward also, for example of cassava. Whomsoever says this will get 100 So

00:45:00 --> 00:45:46

What is that? So the answer is this does not negate this. They are together. And one of the beautiful ones who said the man with no pain, he said, We need to worship Allah based on four things. We love him. We are afraid from him, we hope for his reward, and we are hopeful his reward and we are afraid we will lose his reward. So the reward is part of the intention and then there's many verses in the Quran but the one I really liked is Miami Lasallian mean Decker in a winter Warhammer Mothman put an end now hi, I don't play you but when is your new home edge around the Ehsanullah de cambiar million Allah let me translate and then you will know what this verse answer

00:45:46 --> 00:46:28

the question. Allah says whomsoever do a good deed. What got a man or a woman is actually almost Salam ask this question says all the rewards goes to the man in the Quran. Allah revealed this. So whomsoever does a good deed, a girl a boy. A man or a woman older doesn't matter. Right? When Amina sorry Hamza Corinne what winter and Allah Who did he say philosophy in Yama heighten what will movement has to be is a believer that's the difference between the non believer who does very good deeds we always ask this question. You have to be a believer and Allah Subhana Allah says immediately the reward for NFE and now higher than ever you will live

00:46:29 --> 00:46:34

a very beautiful pure comfortable life comfortable doesn't mean you have everything and comfort gonna

00:46:36 --> 00:46:56

come here no had somebody but they were what comes in this life. That's it. Well NSDL in the home now comes in Agile home the arsenal that you can use and we will reward them for every good deed they did here. There. So you get it both. So I am right, I am doing my decal because it's going to make me feel good Alhambra

00:46:59 --> 00:47:00

will rewards me and why I'm addicted

00:47:04 --> 00:47:05

to the reward

00:47:14 --> 00:47:28

so the fact that you do things to obey Allah subhanaw taala does not negate the reward the fact you also want the reward. And again, sometimes think you're dealing with the generous with the generous, who will give you

00:47:29 --> 00:47:34

now pills to delay the cycle how the one of the most common, especially hugs now is coming.

00:47:35 --> 00:48:15

Anyhow, that one literally there is no Ramadan I've lived in my life. I didn't get this on TV every other day. If I'm not exaggerating, can I take the pill to delay my cycle? So I can fast all Ramadan or I can go to hydro I can go to Umrah The answer is not yes or no. It depends. And this is extremely important. Don't say haram don't say it is is the pill safe for your health? Because anything you take that's harm you is absolutely not allowed. So you don't have these political conditions that you're not supposed to take the pills with. That's number one. Number two, the answer is no, I'm fine. I've used before Hamdulillah. The answer is yes. But wait. And I always

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followed with the following. The following is this will be the last question. So we get the home ready for sada

00:48:25 --> 00:48:31

as you are taking the pills, remember, it is not the pills who's going to make you not get your cycle.

00:48:32 --> 00:48:34

Who is going to make you not get your cycle?

00:48:35 --> 00:48:40

Why is that? Because more than 60% of the time you will start spotting

00:48:41 --> 00:49:04

and as the drama I call it I see it in hygiene every year. So I always prepare the woman or the girl. I said take it. It's but but don't think once you take it nothing is going to happen. You still can get it and if you get it then it will be very confusing. The last advice I give and I said this all this is yours. I said you want to be better than say the Aisha

00:49:05 --> 00:49:46

especially those going to hunch because she had her cycle the day they will go entering the market. And I said what did she do Rasul Allah as AutoSum said, You go do everything what the hygiene does except tawaf. And now at the end before you leave, if you still have your cycle, you can do your Tala. So in general, overall doesn't harm you anything that shouldn't harm you. Yes, you can. It's not going to stop your pain unless Allah allows it and put it in the back of your mind that this may not work as many of the things that come along when in Time flew actually Subhanallah Yeah, so I didn't even finish I had like 20 just to 20 I put it in this sheet. There was way more coming

00:49:46 --> 00:49:50

because I'm delighted to have a question quickly because we have to get the room ready for the

00:49:52 --> 00:49:59

sparring when you start getting spots, not really cycle, but it just despoiled very light. Yeah. And this will get

00:50:00 --> 00:50:10

It's really confusing to them so does that come along hi Mr Hanna Colombo the handy eyeshadow and learn the Haglund stuff we look forward to boo licks Allah Allah say Nam from Allah Allah He was habitus demon Kathira

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