Muslim Parenting – Raising Believers, Tomorrow’s Leaders

Fatima Barkatulla


Channel: Fatima Barkatulla

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The speaker discusses the importance of shaming children and offers tips on finding a good way to teach them. They emphasize the need for parents to be mindful of their children and use the "quality time" concept. The speaker also provides a workshop on learning from shaming and encourages parents to encourage their children to speak openly. They emphasize the importance of being creative in teaching children to be strong and communicate with their parents.

Transcript ©

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bIllahi min ash shaytani R rajim Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim in Al Hamdulillah Muhammad who went to Stein who want to stop Pharaoh, when I will be let him in Cerulean fusina Women sejati Molina

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de la Fela mobile Allah Almighty moodily fella had the Allah wa shadow Allah ilaha illallah wa the hula Shetty gala shadow anna muhammadan. Abu who are a solo

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dear Sisters in Islam as Salaam Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

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It's a pleasure to be here with you today. To begin with, I wanted to share a story with you. And that is a story that really captures the roar and powerful relationship between a mother and her son.

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Rarely has history captured a discussion such as the discussion between Abdullah bin Zubair and his mother as smart as smart was a smart bint Abu Bakar, right, that in lithophane, the one of the two belts, the lady who taught her waist strap or her belt, in order to prepare food and wrap food for the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and her father when they were hiding in the cave, if you remember during the hijab, so now, a smart bint Abu Bakr, she is an elderly lady, she's in her 90s The scholars said and Abdullah bin zware, her son,

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he has been fighting against a particular very tyrannical ruler called her judge or general called her judge Ben Youssef.

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her judge is trying to overthrow Abdullah bin Zubair who has declared who had declared himself with Khalifa okay. And then there was another Khalifa Abu Abdul Malik bin Marwan elsewhere. And so there was this kind of standoff going on. A judge had besieged the whole of Makkah. Abdullah bin Zubair was weak, due to hunger and and his people will we can, because of the constant bombardment of the city, it will be bombarded by rocks. And no food could go into the city and nothing could come out. So they were really really in a in a difficult situation.

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And at any moment, her judge was about to enter Mica.

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Now, Abdullah bins were at this very critical, crucial time when many of his soldiers had started to abandon him due to fear of death and hunger, etc. He went to none other than his mother, a smart backer.

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And a smart and they say that a smart at this time was was blind. She was a very elderly lady. And she came he came to her and he said, and she asked him, Where have the men of hijab reached? And Abdullah in Zubair said, only in death will I find peace, all my companions have left me, including my family and my children. And the people are ready to give me whatever I want of the dunya. In other words, a judge was willing to give a doula anything he wants, if he would just give up his course.

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And then a smart bend over backwards she said to her son, yeah, buena. Yeah, my Oh, my dear son, you are more knowledgeable about your circumstances than me.

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If you know that you are upon the truth, then die like your companions. If you want this dunya then you are the most wretched of people for you have wasted not only yourself, but your companions as well. And then she said to him, how long is your life going to be in this dunya

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come through to cafe dunya. And Abdullah said to his mother, but I will be killed today. So if I carry on with with my cause, and my fight, I'm going to be killed today. There's no doubt about it.

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And a smart, she said, that is better for you than that you should surrender to Hajaj voluntarily and that you should be humiliated. Some child or slave of of the family of Manuel Mejia should play with your head she said, Abdullah said I'm afraid when they kill me that will mutilate me and they will chop up my body.

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And as Matt said, Oh my son is slaughtered goat doesn't feel the pain when it's skinned.

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And Abdullah

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He kissed her forehead. We could just imagine this is such a, such a powerful moment. Most of the time when a woman a mother reaches that sort of age, she's gonna want her son and want her children to be very close to her. She's gonna tell him, Look, don't do anything dangerous. Don't go anywhere. Just stay with me, helped me. But this was a mother who cared so much about her son, she cared more about his akhira.

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And so she When he kissed her forehead, he said to her mother, this was what I felt as well, this is what I wanted to do, but I just wanted to consult you, because obviously he knew that she would be affected if he was killed that day.

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So as smart said,

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she felt his body she felt him when she hugged him embraced him. And she said, she saw that he was wearing a lot of armor. And she said to him, my son, this is not the clothing of a person who wants to be a shaheed.

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So she actually encouraged him to remove his armor.

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So pound them up.

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And then she said to him, my son, tie your izhar tie your you know, your your belt, so that when, when you fall, so finally she was they were so sure that he was going to be shaved that day, when you fall that your order will not be uncovered. She didn't want him to be humiliated in that way. And then she said to him fight with bravery, for you are the son of a Zubair and you are the grandson of Abu Bakr and your grandmother is Sophia.

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And so the Levin Zubair went out, he fought from noon until evening, until

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he was eventually Shaheed and yes, they mutilated him. And they hung up his body in Makkah as a kind of a trophy or a sign for the people to scare the people.

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And when he died, MCCA erupted with crying

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Subhanallah and when he had been born, if you remember, sisters during the hijra,

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the Levin's where he was born, he was the first child to be born. During the hijra, after the prophets, Allah Salam, and the people had migrated. And the whole of the city of Medina had erupted in cheers and duck beers when Abdullah bin Abdullah bin Zubair was born. Why because the non Muslims the the disbelievers in Makkah had said, the Muslims are cursed, and they will not have any more children. There was a rumor going around. And then when Abdullah was born, he was the first child to be born, everybody had been so pleased. And so once again,

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on the day of his death, the whole city erupted with crying.

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when we hear a story like this, we might think to ourselves Subhanallah This is a different level. So a mother who's actually encouraging her son to stick by his principles. And even though she knows he's about to die, he's about to be shaved

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and had judged, you know, he came into the city and he even mocked and tried to employ a smart and said to her, look what I've done to your son.

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And she said to him, you may have corrupted his dunya but he has corrupted your IRA.

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Such were the great mothers of the Ummah, my sisters, they were full of Eman and they were full of knowledge.

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Think about a man behind his mother. Her son was a blind boy, a blind child. She had such high hopes for him. She used to make so much to ask for him that his eyesight would come back. And she struggled and worked hard in order to educate him. And what happened He became the author of the most authentic book after the Quran Subhanallah so every time we look up a hadith every time we read a hadith every time we benefit from that knowledge right when we make we do when we make a zine when all of the things that we do, because of the knowledge that Imam Buhari conveyed to us, his mother is getting a reward from that.

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His mother is being rewarded for that. This is the huge stake that us is that we as mothers have my sisters think of Imam Malik some other he said about his mother. My mother would dress me up in the clothes of the scholars.

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Whilst I was still a young boy. Now in my mind like he used to chase after Singers, apparently in Medina at that time. There were lots of singers and

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He used to chase after them used to like to copy them, things have not really changed have they? And he this is these are the kinds of people that seem to attract youth. And he used to be so attracted, and his mother was like, you know, subhanAllah, I don't want my son to go down this road. So she would gently pull him and talked him into the, into the right direction. And he said, she used to dress me up in the clothes of the scholar. And she used to tie his turban to make him look very smart.

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And he said, she used to say to me, go, go to the masjid and seek knowledge from Arabia, he was a great scholar at that time, study, and learn from his manners, and his good adapt, before you learn from his knowledge.

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now sisters, these women, they love their children. When we think of loving our children, we think of protecting them, we think of giving them sweets, we think of giving them anything they want, everything they want. This is our definition of love for our children, right? We want them to get a degree. Why? Because we want them to have a job. Why so that they can have a nice house so they can get married, and they can be financially comfortable. This is our definition of success for our children.

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But these women were different.

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When their children doubted their mothers gave them for that made them strong. When their children feared, they made them brave. They told them to do the thing that we would never dare to tell our children to do. When their children hesitated. Their mothers made them bold. When they forgot their mothers reminded them when they were clinging on to this dunya.

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Their mothers reminded them of the Ark era.

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They love them so much. And don't think that they love them any less than us. In fact, they love them more, because they wanted better for them. Because they knew that this life is nothing. This life is just a few years, be in this world like a traveler.

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They knew that if they really love their children, they really wanted good for them, that they would seek the highest levels of paradise for them. And that was true love and true success for their children.

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So I really want us to think about that and contemplate that.

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Now all of us wish and all of us want that our children be guided and be righteous.

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And sometimes we think you know, how can I guarantee? Is there a way I can just completely guarantee that my child will be guided?

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Well, if you do know the formula for that, then please share it with us. Because I would like to know as well.

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Unfortunately, just as you of course, you must have read the stories of the prophets, you will have read about Yahoo bunnies. And you will have read the great prophets even like Yahoo at least have had children who, who did terrible things, or prophets like no Elisa and had children who died disbelievers who rejected their own fathers in the end.

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So we sometimes you know, read the stories we must think to ourselves, what hope do we have, you know, they were prophets, they had Allah's help. They knew the right way of raising children were struggling.

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So what do we have?

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Well, my sister's Allah Subhana Allah

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tells us in the Quran, oh, I'm forsaken, what an illegal nada, protect or ward off your children Ward your children away from the fire your children and your families away from the Fire, whose fuel is men and stones. So even though there is no guarantee, and there is no way of guaranteeing the end result of the way our children will turn out, okay, there is no way of guaranteeing that, just as there's no way that we can guarantee that we will guide somebody to Islam.

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Even the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam couldn't guarantee that a bar lib, one of his most beloved family members would be guided

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just in this in a similar way. What we can do is do our part.

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We may not be able to guarantee the results, but we have to do our part.

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Basically, it's the hedaya of earshot and the Hidayat of Tofik. You must have heard of this. He they have ensured means that we guide people by pointing them towards the right way. We show them the right way we do everything we can to help people to be guided.

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But the guidance of tofield the actual success and the actual ability to be guided. This will come only from Allah that's not in our hands. So as parents you

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But one thing that we really want to do is make sure we've done everything from our part. And so that when we stand in front of Allah Subhana Allah, we will say to him that I did my part.

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So what are some of those steps we can take?

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In sha Allah, I'm going to go through some of those steps. And at the end, we're going to have something a little bit practical for all of you to do.

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The first thing that each and every one of us has to do if we want to optimize the chances, if you like, of our children being guided, is to be pious ourselves. For us to be pious parents ourselves, think about inserting gaff, think about the orphans, who, whose parents had buried the treasure under the wall. Do you remember that story, sisters?

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And whether he was when the wall was falling? He he held up the wall and Musa Ali Salam said, why are you bothering to fix this wall when the people of this town had been so nasty towards us? Just leave it. And Heather said, Know, their parents, the parents of the children. There were some orphans, he said, and their parents have buried a treasure for them under this wall. And the parents they were very pious people.

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So Allah subhanaw taala, because of the piety of the parents, he was protecting the children.

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So you see my sisters, this is the number one way that we can help our children to be guided by being pious ourselves, one of the self one of the people from the early generations. He said to his son, oh, my son, you do not know how many records of Salah I have prayed in the night for your sake, because of you because I want good for you. And I want Allah to protect you.

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So that's the first thing, being pious and true to Islam ourselves. Number two,

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making dua.

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making dua, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said there are three such people whose desires are accepted instantly. Number one, the dua of the oppressed person.

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Number two, the dua of a traveler. And number three, a Mother's Day for her child. So never underestimate the power of sometimes, you know, mother can find herself in a situation where she feels completely helpless. Her child is not listening to her. Her child is older now she doesn't have any control.

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And the child is going astray. Never underestimate the power of

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in bringing our children back to the right path.

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Think about Ibrahim Ali Salam and the way in which he made Subhan Allah so many centuries before, and the answer of for his of his dua he made to offer his children and his progeny. And the answer to his was the coming of the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam as a guide for his progeny.

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So Allah subhanaw taala can protect our children and their children and their children's children. Just from our two hours,

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some of them beautiful two hours we have Robina like the two hours that Ibrahim Ali Salam made rubbish and the mochi masala tea woman to Reethi rubella what a couple Rabinow fairly windy windy day here with me yo maya Coleman himself. So he made to offer his future progeny. He also made the DUA Robina watch Elena, and this was Ibrahim Ali Salam and his son smile Robina Jana Muslim Nene laka woman Maria Tina Mata Muslim Metallica What are in a second hour tube eyeliner in like an anteater wearable Rahim they said Our Lord make us Muslims submit

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to you and from our descendants a Muslim nation in submission to you and show us our rights. Right the rights of passage and accept our repentance Indeed you are the Accepting of repentance the merciful

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so the second thing is making dua never stopped making black number three,

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loving them and giving them positive associations with Islam.

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Why is it that sometimes you know mothers use Quran or

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doing extra prayers or doing something that's supposed to be something for the sake of Allah using it as a punishment? Right?

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Right. If you don't do that, then I'm gonna make you read more Quran. Who knows if it's something bad is if it's something you're giving the children negative associations

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expressing our love to them.

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Often, sometimes in our cultures, we're not very expressive in our love for our children. expressing love means saying that I love you. But it also means giving them your full undivided attention.

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And there's a myth, you know, the myth of quality time, people think that I can ignore my child all day, maybe I'll be at work or I'll be on my phone. And then I'll just have one hour. And I'll just, that's my quality time, right. So then when it's time they grab their child, and they're like, right? It's quality, time time. And they'll sit down. And that's not how it works. Quality Time is something that happens naturally happens spontaneously, it happens when you spend a long time with somebody. Those moments come when that child needs you. Those moments come when that child wants to talk to you, and you ignore them, you'll never get that moment again. So it's about spending time

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with our children. So candlelight, in our times, we have so many distractions, we have these mobile phones, and we have social media and all of these things.

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Now, we may be harmlessly using them and thinking, Oh, it's just innocent, it's nothing you know. But imagine a child who grows up constantly seeing their parent is not emotionally available for them,

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is not giving them any attention

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will lie that child eventually will give up, will give up trying to seek your attention.

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We don't want that. Because of my sisters, we have a window of opportunity, when they're very young, until about the age of 50. And maximum, if if that, right, we have this window of opportunity in order to help build a very strong relationship with our children. After that, there'll be free. And only what we have sown is what we will reap. So expressing our love for our children. But love doesn't just mean soft love, meaning, you know, just giving them things and being easygoing. Sometimes love means setting limits. Tough love telling them no, I'm doing this for your own good.

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And even if at the time they hate it,

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when you know that there's something right for them something you have to put a stop to. Right? For example, at the moment in Britain, childhood obesity is a very big problem, right? And there are parents being put into prison, or children being taken away from their parents, because their parents are not helping their children to control their eating. Right? And why is that? It's because it could be because the parents can't say no to the child.

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But we can't do that to our children. Even if that child has a tantrum, even if that child, you know, doesn't speak to us for the rest of the day. One day, when they grow up, there'll be thankful to us that we set those limits, that we help them to be disciplined. So love means tough love as well. Number four, showing them how to have a relationship with Allah.

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Now, there's books, there are children's books nowadays, you know, the book of Tawheed. And they'll talk about

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I saw one book for children talking about we're all here. Smart was fat right? Now, that's not the way you teach children about Allah.

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That's, you know, like, turning on this topic of their relationship with Allah into like a textbook like Max or something, right? That's not how it works. Their relationship with Allah should be something, a gut feeling that they have something so strong and powerful and natural for them.

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And that can only be nurtured. If we ourselves have a strong connection with Allah.

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How do we show our children to how to have a relationship with Allah? Show them how to communicate with Allah. You know, there are brothers and sisters. When they become practicing Muslims, and they want to make blood they don't know where to start. They don't know how to how do I speak to a lot, I don't know how to speak to them.

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One of the greatest things that we can do greatest gifts we can give our children is show them how to communicate with Allah. And how will they learn that except by them seeing us communicate with ALLAH. I remember my mother when when I was very young, from a very young age, she used to gather us children together. And this is something that I think, really had a big impact. And she used to hold our hands up and she used to make that allowed in her language in order right? So we understood Urdu and she used to just make the her natural way of making she used to cry first used to praise Allah. She say Allah, you've given us so much. Oh Allah, you've we

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are so sinful, and she has to really show herself to be so humble in front of Allah. And then she would go through every single member of the family and make dua for them.

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We knew it's going to come to me now it's going to come to him, it's going to come, we wanted to hear what she would say.

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And then at the end, she would praise Him so much praise Allah so much from glass from the Quran. And that had a very powerful effect on all of us. Because now we knew how to communicate with Allah. And the reason why it's so important that we make that connection for them with Allah, is that my sisters, we don't know if we're going to be around for our children. We don't know what kind of pathway Allah is going to take them through in life. Think about Yusuf Ali salaam, in the well, you know, Subhan Allah, imagine his parents have no idea what's happened to him, they have no idea what could happen to him.

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We're to do not know what's going to happen in the future who our children will meet, we can't be with them. 24/7, right.

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But what we can do is empower them by giving them that relationship with Allah. So that even if we're not there, we know that they know how to ask Allah for help. They know that if they make a mistake, that all hope is not lost, they can always turn to Allah and say, sorry, we have to teach them how to do that. And the best way is for them to see us to do it. We have to lose all of our sense, sense of inhibition and embarrassment and all that and just show our children how to communicate with ALLAH. I can't emphasize it enough. Try it. Sisters, by the way, this is your homework to try making dua with your child, sit your child down with you and make dua aloud, show

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your child how to connect with Allah. Even if you want to ask for repentance, show your child yourself, asking Allah for forgiveness.

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Number five, building our children's self esteem and giving them good role models

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by giving them good role models. So you know, children, they just crave our attention and praise them, because from a young age, they're just constantly asking themselves, who am I? What kind of a person am I? Am I a valuable person? Or am I stupid? Am I clever? Am I this am I that they're constantly asking themselves? And the main way in which they come to the complete their own conclusions about themselves is through the feedback they hear from their parents. Right.

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So praising our children, not overpraising them, but recognizing the good traits, not comparing them with their brothers and sisters. Oh, he's, he's the clever one. He's the sporty one. He's this one. He's the that one? No, don't put them into boxes. Because you don't know what potential that child has.

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Right? And never allow my sister is never allowed teachers at school to make you think that your child is stupid, or make you think that your child is unable to do something. Okay? Most of the time. It's because they got poor teaching skills. Okay? Right. So for example, my child's teacher comes to me and she says,

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unfortunately, your son, you know, his handwriting is not very good. And I said, Okay, so what are you going to do? What are you going to do about it? Right? How are you going to help him? Do you see what I mean? Like most of the time, they're just giving you information. And they've got too many children to look after and to deal with. And so my thing is, well, okay, so let's think of solutions for this. Don't just come and complain to me about my child, right? Obviously, I don't mean ignoring their negative traits, if there's some negative traits that they have. But what I mean is, I've seen I've seen mothers completely overreacting, right? So the the teacher tells him something, they'll go

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home and the child is going to really get it.

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Why are you so stupid? Why are you so dumb? Why can't you be like the other children? Why? Why are you at the bottom of the class? Why this? Why that.

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That's never going to help them at all. What we've got to do in that situation is actually protect them from that negative feedback. We should actually protect them from that negative feedback, and instead, think of a way to bring out the best in them.

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Because sometimes, it's just that the teacher doesn't get on with the child, right? Well, the teacher doesn't really know what's really good about your child and what good characteristics he has, and she doesn't know how to bring out the best in that child.

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So never allow somebody else to give to say something about your child. And then for you to take it as if it's a fact. No, if we don't believe in our children and who's going

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I believe in them.

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Give them positive role models, teach them about the sahaba. read to them stories. And that's what we're going to do a little workshop on in a moment, read stories to them, because stories are their way of learning about the world. Think of all the stories that Allah has filled the Quran with

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the Sierra.

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Number six, train them and discipline them in Islamic guidelines. So things like lowering your gaze, we've got to teach our children this from a young age, lower your gaze, you don't have to look at everything. You don't have to speak about everything that you're thinking about. Right? What are the two R's for entering and exiting the home or entering and exiting the toilet? All of these things will help our children to be people who are protected,

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knocking on the door before they enter their parents room, being careful about exposing the outra

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at the age of seven, separating them in in their beds, or giving them different blankets, at least in the beds, all of these things. Being careful in the toilet, you know not to allow impurities to get on them on their clothes, all of these things my sisters never think of them as trivial. They're all ways in which we are disciplining our children and teaching them to protect themselves from Shavon. Number seven, bring the Quran to life for them.

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You can't bring the brand to life for them. If you yourself, don't feel passionate about the Quran. If you yourself, don't read the Quran

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and we're going to do the workshop is based on that as well. Number eight, Salah, teach them so at the age of seven, and then stop stop being more strict with them at the age of 10. Because salah is their connection with Allah, it is the thing that's going to keep them on the straight path.

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Number nine, the Islamic environment, their friends, okay, the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam said, A man will follow the religion of his close friends. So let each of you look at who he takes as close friends and sometimes as much as you can really help them to make the positive friendships by inviting the right sorts of people to your house, helping them to ignite friendships.

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Number 10. Listening to them,

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and letting them talk to you openly. Okay, our children should never feel that there's a subject that they can't talk to us about. And this new generation, they're much more open than the last generation, right? Like, when my daughter was born, my sons were like,

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how do you know that she's a girl?

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Right? That was and I was like, Oh, my God, I'm not ready for this. I'm not ready for these questions. And then my son will come home sometimes, hey, what does this word mean? And I'm like,

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not in front of your holiday, especially not in front of the holiday. Because he already thinks, you know, she's a homeschooler, she already thinks is bad enough that I put them into school. And now they come home with these words. But at the same time, we shouldn't overreact. These are just words to them. We need to find a good way to explain those words. If they're not going to be able to come to us who are they going to go to? Right? They're gonna go to the internet, right, which is the worst thing, or they're gonna go to some friend who's willing to talk about those things. They shouldn't be able to come to us, maybe we can teach them the other day and say, Look, just come to

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me privately. And then we can talk about it. But never allow anything to be a taboo and never overreact to anything they say. Sometimes, right, you need to take a breather, but come back, and help them to see it in the right way. So my sisters, now we're going to give a sheet out to everybody. And it's just gonna take a few minutes, you're gonna need a pen.

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And what I want you to do,

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Sean Charlaine, let you see the worksheets first.

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There's a lot of sisters, so

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I think everyone's going to have to quickly pass them around.

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But I'll just tell you what you're going to do with these worksheets. On this worksheet, you'll notice

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it's called the character building Quran and Sera, Quran similar story list. What I want you to do sisters, I have identified here,

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I've identified a number of characteristics that we really want our children to have, or lessons that we really want to our children to learn in life.

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And what I want you to do is, let's just use the first page, the front page, okay, because of time.

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And you can do the back page for homework.

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I want you to take just a few minutes with the person next to you

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and either discuss all right

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out in those boxes, a story or a snippet of a story or a part of the story from either the Quran or from the Sierra, from, from the Sunnah from this Hobbit, for example, from the stories of the sahaba. Just quickly jot down for me

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which story you think would convey that characteristic to your child?

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Just think the first story that comes into your head

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that would help your child appreciate that particular lesson.

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Okay, what I'm gonna do is

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because I know that you're all very clever, mashallah,

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what I'm gonna do is I'm just going to ask you.

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So which story would you tell your child for example, to teach them that disobedience to Allah and his messenger leads to defeat?

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Put your hand up, please? Yes, sister.

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Battle an excellent example. Right? You teach them the Battle of the story of the Battle of okay, which story for example, and there are other stories as well, of course, we're just going to take one for each. Which story could you tell your child to teach them that if Allah is on your side, no one can overcome you.

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00:36:22--> 00:36:22


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the Prophet Yusuf Alayhi. Salam, the story of Yusuf Allah is on your side, eventually, no one can overcome you. Any other example?

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Musa alayhis salam, yep. So growing up in the house of Pharaoh.

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Also, there's the story of the boy and the king, right. The boy and the king, you know, the story,

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as hobbled look at dude, the boy and the king.

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Okay, and what about Don't be dazzled by this life? How could we teach them about not being dazzled by the life of this world?

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Anyone? Yes.

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Certain sorry.

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As hobbled calf,

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that's a good example. Mashallah. Not to be dazzled by this life? And how about the story of our own? Have you heard of the story of Chiron that when he came out everyone was dazzled by him? And then Allah subhanaw taala caused him to be you know, swallowed by the Earth. Okay, what about Allah can give to whomever he wills without measure?

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00:37:45--> 00:37:51

Maria Maria Salam, right. So Allah is to give her you know, the fruits of the summer in the winter and the fruits of the winter in the summer.

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And also you can think about Ibrahim Ali salam how he had a son in old age, or Zakaria had a son in old age luck can give to whomever he wills

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Okay, what about what looks like a defeat could be a success

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Yes, it's the

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the Treaty of Davia Excellent. So the incident of Davia you know, everyone thought oh, this is just compromised this is just Muslims. We're just gonna look bad. We're just compromising and being nice. But Allah said enough Atlanta like a first hand Marina, this is a great success for you. And that led to the conquest of Makkah right and led to many people becoming Muslim during that time of peace. Okay, what about don't twist Allah's commands?

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When Israel which Yeah, so that was horrible subject, right? Terrible stuff, the people of the Sabbath.

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Okay, what about Allah can make your enemies your best allies

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the story of the conversion of Omar bin al Hapa, right, a person who was torturing the Muslims to such an extent that nobody could have imagined that you'd become a Muslim.

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Okay, and I'll just do one more.

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I'll do one more just to this is just like as a taster for you you know to see how you can actually bring so many lessons so many characteristics you want your child to have three stories. Okay, what about

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what about never lose hope in Allah

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never lose hope in Allah.

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00:39:54--> 00:39:55

the prophet Nora.

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Yeah, I guess

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00:40:00--> 00:40:00


00:40:01--> 00:40:08

Eunice. Yeah, so he obviously he just kept making La ilaha illa Anta subchronic and Nico to Mina volume in

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any other example.

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Yeah, the last person who will enter Jana. That's a lovely story for children, for them to see how Allah laughs right, in that story.

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How about the Prophet Yaqoob as well, Prophet ya por la Salam, he went through so much that he never, ever lost hope, right? He knew that one day, maybe I'm looking bring all of my sons back to me.

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So my sisters, you've seen from this little exercise, right? How as moms, we can be really creative. We don't have to do things. You know, teaching our children isn't just about giving them a list of rules and saying, Do this, do that not don't do this and don't do that. It's not like that. We should be creative. Allah has given us a wealth of stories that we can use to convey a message. And those stories could convey the message better than you know. 1000 exaltations 1000 talks 1000 Anything you know, so please, sisters, I want you to take these sheets. I want you to think of the lessons that you want to teach your children as well as you know your children best. And I want you

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to add them to the sheet. And I want you to literally think of excellent stories that you could tell even if they're snippets of stories, and every bedtime in sha Allah. I want you to try and convey one of those stories to your children, even if it's a short story, but tell those stories with an aim. This is the lesson I want to convey to my child. So inshallah sisters, I hope that that was a little useful, useful little session for you. May Allah protect our children. My sisters never lose hope in your children. As one of our teachers said, you should always imagine that your child is wearing a t shirt that says still under construction. You know?

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Sometimes we treat them as though this is a you know, I'm doomed my child is doing this is the end know, our children are still under construction, there's still hope. And if there's one person who should always have hope in their child is their mother. So inshallah I hope that helped to chat Allah Subhana Allah whom I will be handing to Allah, Allah inlanta bureaucrat