Channel: Faith IQ
Topics: Islam QA
Who's the boss in the home? The husband or the wife? And does it have to be one or the other?
You know, I can tell you something. In my personal life, for example, there's certain things that I'm really good at that I'm definitely the leader in, in my home. There's other things that my wife is good at. And she's definitely the leader in that I defer to her almost completely in those particular issues. My wife, she happens to be a lawyer, and you know, she's a graduate of accounting school. So who do you think does the taxes in the house me or her, that's her field, that's her thing. And it becomes really important to kind of see life in that way. It's a balance of yin and yang and strength and purposes. And that was how the prophets I sent him structured it Why do you
think when he came off the mountain of nor in the cave of Hira, he ran to God, God, Allahu Allah, he didn't run to Abu Bakr or anyone else, or to his uncle or his friends, he ran to his wife. And he said to her, this is what happened to me, what do you think it is, and it's the same thing. So I tell him that he did when he came to Selma on the day of her baby, and she said, you know, let me shave your head and the Sahaba will follow you. And we'll also take their atheroma, you know, he was a person who would defer to that which was right and would would would take counsel with with his spouse in many, many matters. So it's not about who's the leader or who has more power or a balance
of power in the home, it's really about defining what's right for our house, there's no particular defined roles that should be excluded from anyone in terms of their expertise or their place. So not just because you wear the pants in the home. And I know some sisters wear jeans nowadays as well, but not just because, you know, in that figurative sense that you're the one who has to make those old decisions. It's your final say in everything. No, there's a level of equity that has been sought as a balance by a loss of had I want to add, that will enrich your home life. Now, there are certain times where there will be a shock color and one person has to make that decision. And when that
decision is made, it is something that everyone has to come together and accept that decision and move along with it. Even though it might not turn out the way that we thought it would. And the area where Allah subhanho wa Taala. He says when originally Allah hin adonijah, and men, they have been given a place of responsibility above their spouse. It's not responsibility as in monitoring and commanding them to do this or not to do this. But it's responsibility that you now are the one where within you and within your household, that even when something hasn't gone the way that you wanted that with you. There's that effort and deliverance and service that you seek to make it right. It
means you just have to double your effort to do what's best for your home. May Allah subhanaw taala fill our home with harmony and love and balance and equity and allow us to share our relationships completely with one another in a way that's pleasing to Him as is the son of the messenger Muhammad Sallallahu