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Edris Khamissa

Channel: Edris Khamissa

Series:

Episode Notes

Thursday 03.07.2014

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato 19 minutes after 11 you're listening to Al mashreq on radio Islam international My name is Joe he said and inshallah has is for the rest of the hour we'll be joined by our guest on line brother Idris camisa and inshallah focusing on social issues but relating to the month of Ramadan and different aspects concerning the month of Ramadan. Insha. Allah has his, he has

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Ramadan has been running smooth so far, but I would

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definitely with the people of Gaza, who are under bombardment currently and who, because of the kidnap and murder of those three Israeli teenagers which is just alleged, accused that it was carried out by Hamas. The entire salsa is the from badminton, we make a must

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protect the people of Gaza and I must have fun with Allah control the hands of the oppressors in silence. And Allah subhanho wa Taala and protect every Muslim around the world. Do we have a guest on the line whether it is coming Saturday morning tomorrow? avacado

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It seems that we still getting him on the line inshallah we'll await his arrival in just a few minutes. But as we continue our program in our discussion Muslims around the world, we find Mashallah that the month of Ramadan really draws out the best within the community or from the community. And we see that Muslims all over the world have common traits. We have a trait of Salah we have a fleet of tarawih we have our practice of espar which is so important to us also for which is so important to us and the different aspects of our fasting of our Deen and we all want to become better in our Deen all appreciate pure and beautiful recitation of the puranic in all appreciate

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the deen of Allah subhanaw taala and we only have great love for this Deen of Allah subhanho wa Taala and it is this love for Allah has been that is the driving factor in our lives. And it is a sign of a man certainly as handler that we have love for the deen of Allah subhanaw taala love for the love for taraweeh love for fasting. It is a sign of our Eman indeed. And we make love with almost no data. Nurture in all this he man that every Muslim has within their hearts and handles Allah make it flourish into a beautiful tree and the solid base of faith in Allah subhanaw taala brother Idris Rahmani Kumamoto, la vaca to

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give you trying, it's funny signage Aziz, we will get to him in just a few minutes. But nevertheless, he has this a man that Allah subhanaw taala has planted within us

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is indeed a beautiful man. It is an E man which has roots deep within our heart. And it comes from Allah subhanaw taala. When Allah tala decides to guide the person, that Allah is Allah, Allah guides that person in mysterious and in different ways. And Allah subhanho wa Taala and really takes out ends in different things just for that person's guidance. We find the different examples of the harbor Agila and home and how they found the guidance how they found the Hidayat. There was a heavy who found these Hidayat in, in an idol that was thrown into the pit with the idol could not help itself in the guidance could not assist itself. And then you find the habit of Dylan found the

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guidance in different creation of Allah subhanho wa Taala and this is the signs that Allah subhanaw taala escaped or feel that there will be unforeseen kamasan that in the horizons within yourselves all have signs for you to recognize the loss of panatela Will you not look carefully to draw out the lessons of the greatness of a must handle data from all of these things? And 23 minutes after 11 we're taking a short break when we come back inshallah.

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Stay tuned.

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Welcome back to Allah Masha conveyed Islam International. And when we speak about Ramadan around the world, we spoke about the desire and joy that every one of us have during the month of Ramadan, the desire to become better, and the joy that we experience at the time of his power, the joy of soul as well. And the beauty of fasting that we all enjoy and we all experience a thought comes to mind and immediately as

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I think about Ramadan, the thought comes to mind of the Syrian refugees, people who have been displaced from their homes in Syria, living as refugees either on the borders of the EU within Turkey, some enjoy Jordan, some in Lebanon and a

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great number of Syrians who have been displaced from their homes and the type of Ramadan that they may be experiencing that one day they were perhaps living in suburbs and localities and in homes that we that we are experiencing and then they are forced to leave everything and

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during other times it is to a certain degree different it is to a certain degree more understandable but when it comes to Ramadan, and then you suddenly have this desire to be back home every person there used to be at home during Ramadan because you have your certain ways of doing things. You have your your home that you want to make up for in your own home and you'd be comfortable when you have in your home. You have a spa also that you have your system delicacies that you enjoy, and Serbians definitely

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very, in a very have a rich tradition when it comes to the type of foods that they have. And you just have to Google Ramadan in Syria, and you would think of huge files of book club as you think of

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fruit shops with all the different colors of fruits.

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And think about about the store hands you think about table crust on the floor with with all different types of meals prepared. And, you know, brothers who have been to Syria during the month of Ramadan prior to this protests and prior to these to this great war that has taken place in Syria, I will tell you about how the father used to be especially those brothers who went for, for the IP calf in animosity the boxer and they had to stop over in Syria for the night too. And explain to you how beautiful the spider hood is in Syria and how it used to be. And now using images of, of children in his refugee camp at what is a refugee camp, it is a tented village, or perhaps just a

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containerized Fallujah, perhaps in the corner of a little tent on the second floor with a little stove, maybe a pair of fins over a little cast of for the few pots and steel plates, and the pretty printing whatever they can preparing, they can prepay.

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And they make they make whatever they can make in the little bit, a little bit of an abode. And you have the image of a of a of a tent and the family is still sitting around in the tent because they cannot afford to eat. They eating a little bit of vegetables, cucumbers, peas, beans, rice, tomatoes, potatoes, just the basics that they can afford. And this is what they put up prepared and this was a family that would would enjoy meat and share lamb and

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and the lavish meal as at other times, and then you have another family sitting inside of the tent talking

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with each other just enjoying the atmosphere of the month of Ramadan. Also taraweeh Salah taking place in a makeshift Masjid, in the Zachary camp in a tent. And this is these are all the types of images that are coming out of Syria. These are type of images, and they're coming out of the Syrian refugees members panatela make it easy for them. And we'll see if we have that to be given or if you would like to give additional charities was the practice of martial arts in the month of Ramadan. Then consider these people and consider Muslims around the world all over the world we Muslims are going through difficulties and Muslims are being tested with the man and one of the hadith of

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Rasulullah sallallahu Islam really rings true with NaVi Salama Harrison said Carol yakugaku. From that it is very possible that poverty could lead to disbelieve in Allah subhanho wa Taala and just for that sake in for the sake of preservation of Eman of these individuals may Allah subhanaw taala protect them we should inshallah and as you see whatever we have, so that

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so that they are not thrown away and attracted by other missionaries and other religions who want to provide for them on condition that they take whatever material whatever invitation from them as well. It's 28 minutes before 11 inshallah Aziz will be joined on the line

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in just a few seconds Stay tuned

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minutes before 12 Welcome back to our master convenience time International. My guest for the second half of the program provides is camisa Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.

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Salaam.

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My beloved Maulana

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separation anxiety

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is very How are you keeping this morning?

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How are you keeping this money and along the line so well in our life

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we have the chance of breathing in the month of Ramadan an opportunity to redeem ourselves and opportunities to daily no recompense and do the right thing and we pray inshallah, that this is the best Ramadan we have had we have had inshallah. altrusa ramadan

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ramadan,

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as easy as it is right now that you've come into the program. You sound like a person he started time

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Keep it like that,

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which is by the month of Ramadan is already almost a week through and Alhamdulillah Allah Allah has mercy is with us. And Allah Allah has greatness is with us, the truth is that we are enjoying this month of Ramadan. And also together with that there are many Muslims around the world who, who are going through great challenges, even though it's the month of Ramadan Absolutely, I think, sometimes is a point that we forget.

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In fact, yesterday when I was speaking, you know, to my family, as it were. And I said to them, and as I say, my wife is smiling, you know, I'm gonna make a smiley face already. So it's nice that you see the husband when we are blessed, right? And we're in big trouble. Right? And you may have seen to them Alhamdulillah that, you know, we have an opportunity every day, you know, even when we are opening our first I said to them the food we eat at home on a normal day with like something will not see your whole life on the day of eat. And I said that we are some people who ms thought, you know, strike three is that they will not they didn't know what the star into comes from, you know,

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in the sense that they live in such a dire dire straits. inshallah, I really pray that our family, you know, I really cohesive the corner in the connect with each other. And they really exploit this month of Ramadan, to make amends and to create harmony in the home.

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And the beauty of Ramadan has to enter into our homes. It is something that we create ourselves well while Ramadan comes with its Baraka. But Allah subhanho wa Taala has kept the choice upon us to attract that Baraka and to draw that Baraka into our home. And this happens when we bring alive the month of Ramadan was good.

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Absolutely, I mean, it's like this, you know, you know, generally speaking, you know, our mothers, you know, our sisters get up before us, then they, you know, some of them read the

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others get involved in the kitchen, and biting will not get a vote and why can we not, for example, you know, say to yourself, you know, I've never had a salad before

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the man is making a promise to us, you know that he will respond to our needs. And the third point, people must understand that the month of Ramadan is a time of personal sacrifice, the time when you have deprivation, the time you feel hungry, that's the nature of it, and therefore the reward is so great. And I think you know, we forget sometimes the doctor tightness is more compelling than tightness itself. And you say to yourself, no, no, I would get you know, get up early did my dad and

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my MA say, I would

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inshallah, read the Quran, you know, then I'll go to the master did my estrogen fella, I say a few minutes there, if not longer come home, then we continue to read the Quran, you know, and do this Can you find that in our bodies begins to adapt, and to the some of the change challenges of Ramadan, which are so critical in terms of developing ourselves spiritually, and it's an opportunity because you know, whether we like it or not, we often hear about this young man, Pastor, he got cancer and so on and so forth. And we must always they make law, you know, all the time, that Allah gives us good health and that you know, and once we got the good health, you got to make sure we do

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everything we can to come closer to Allah, because Allah Allah, Allah, Allah reminded us to do you think of the kind of personality he thinks of himself.

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And it is by some of the issues in Ramadan, some of the things that you are facing.

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So many so many issues. The two thoughts just strike me and before I forget, before we talk about the issues monana what I would like to do, you know, after Ramadan, I've got one of the most powerful books I've ever received on parenting, written by people that I know is Sham

00:19:50--> 00:19:59

Abdullah Ahmed Abu Salim Morales, it was born in 94 pages and underlie the given opportunity to write it

00:20:00--> 00:20:47

A What do you call a something on the back page and what I wrote there that time. I just received the book the other day. And it took him a 13 years to write this book if I said yes, for the most insightful and comprehensive books on parenting, the word check on issues in a home environment and experience you will have children and helping to transform families across the globe. And it's when we have a broad headings of the topics. And what I would like to do with this may take as a book few weeks to do, but a good idea is to the third chapter is concerned, the broad chapter is setting the foundation and the good parenting. What is it and how do we begin? second chapter, the family unit,

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why is it important? What are its function? The third chapter, good prevention, setting the right goals. The fourth chapter, the most important goal raising children who love God, the fifth chapter addressing common challenges and pitfalls. The sixth chapter, common misconception tip for the mystery avoid chapter seven, easy to go wrong. Chapter in part two is character building cannot wait. Then the chapter nine The road to a healthy child hygiene, nutrition, physical exercise, and sleep. Chapter 10 is about breastfeeding chapter 11. The child's brain use it or lose it chapter 12 range boys and girls are the different that chapter 13 sex and sex education what can we tell our

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children part three, character building and personality? chapter 15 nurturing courage, Chapter 16 teaching love chapter 17 teaching honesty, and trustworthiness, the next chapter, deepening responsibility teaching and goes on and chapter 10. Skipping now, Chapter 20 fostering creativity next chapter self esteem and goes on the last one, the destructive impact of television video and computer games monana it's very, very comprehensive, very beautifully done under the law and the what inshallah

00:22:15--> 00:22:17

I take your advice, yes, it is.

00:22:19--> 00:22:37

Very, very interesting and sound mind it could be a good inspiration for us as well, good material that we can inshallah share with our listeners and perhaps benefit ourselves as well. It's Shalini Shalini, that project, let me ask the question, what are the challenges?

00:22:38--> 00:23:36

You know, I I like to observe the people and also learn, observe myself, you know, we need to be self aware. One of the things that can be a pain in my marriage is that you know, that the husband and wife, often they have diverse experiences and often they're very, very different. Now, you may have, you may be married to a woman or a sister, or who has strong value, his generosity and and she is very philanthropic and she likes to invite people, poor people, whatever changes, you know, you know, people need of help to the home, we have a husband, who is socially disengaged. And this can be the kind of problem in a situation. Now, what must happen is in the manner because he is socially

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disengage, McCarty imposes value on his right, and stifle her generosity. This often happens in the No, I find this a very common kind of thread. So I think what's important is that when people get married, we are something that we feel strongly about. We may have a strong content value, for example, Nana, you might have grown up with lots of good friends in your house to become a part of your life. I mean, you're played with them, your time with them,

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and your contact each other. Now, I mean, when you marry a woman

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has not been exposed socially, to my feet, you know, what? Their monana you know, I don't want to be in touch with your friends, or your friends. You know, I don't like it when they come home. And now those kinds of things, you know, I think unfair, because the the imposition? Yes, of course, your field must not become an obsession with the impact on your relationship with your wife, but you spent so much time with them the gelatin time for your family, that's another matter altogether. And I think you know, all marriages will be far more successful.

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In the first three years, we get to know your partner, get to know what are the values that underpin their behavior, what are the attitudes, what is it that makes them happy, and we make sure the lowest not

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Welcome to linear, you will not impinge on the pattern of being here. And back to me modernizing failing to contain a significant Alhamdulillah. You know,

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Allah bless my beloved wife, you know, Alhamdulillah, you know, I am when they say I'm a gregarious animal, I'm a social animal. And I know lots of people are not bluffing. And

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you know, when I see a stranger, you know, I want to invite him home, you know, and when you have reluctance on the part of your

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very, very problematic

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use of that knowledge.

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It is a win win.

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Husband and wife don't have this mutual agreement of what the way forward is going to be how they having to, for example, with with finances, how are we going to deal with it with different aspects in the marriage, how are they going to deal with it,

00:26:03--> 00:26:54

when we may not on a common plate, it obviously puts strain on the relationship. And between them, it's either they come to some sort of an agreement and arrangement or they need to go for counseling to be able to come on to the same page, this lack of communication obviously, is what what leads to that, and lack of understanding of each other, as human beings, it has been quite a while what they found is that husband and wife sometimes don't understand each other as human beings like what their personal ways may be. And they know they know different nuances, different specific ways of doing things, and they would take it in the wrong way. And this would call them the two problems.

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Because sometimes,

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you have to disagree.

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If you disagree on one matter,

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sometimes so consumed by the good not see other, the goodness of the other people who go through one doesn't

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know

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why we should continue like this statement I made. Now, really, I think that shows a

00:27:29--> 00:27:38

smacks of immaturity, that is important for us to understand that we are different, you are unique.

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In the way we respond to the way we broke up. And I think we need to understand long as we are united, in our foremost goal, the phone was going

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from the fire, if you are helping each other to change, Jenna, and I knew as a collective

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can grow on investing in the lives of other people are hamdulillah Al Hamdulillah, Al Hamdulillah. Allah, I think, you know what, this is the whole point about the dynamics of relationships, that we need to understand that we are not only unique, that we have a purpose, that, you know, if your spouse cannot be there and be supportive of you, in whatever you do, you know, then he can be quite problematic. And therefore you find, therefore I always subscribe to doing marital counseling, I subscribe to it. Because I think it's really important that, you know, in that way people can discuss the different personalities. And each one would know, for example, you know, a, sometimes

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the wife might say to the husband, you know, what are all the rights to be really, you know, what, I grew up in a home, where we do not really invite people along, you know, and so therefore, I'm saying to you,

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I don't want to do that. Right, there's one few

00:29:06--> 00:29:10

things that I need to share. Can I share that? Yes.

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The one is also was he agreed that no, people are different, we must also respect the differences, right? That's really important that you must respect the differences, right? And once you respect the consistency,

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and the point of view need to be there and see what you can do, right? There's point one right now. And the other important thing is this.

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That if you are, you know,

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upset about something, you know, and before you learn, whatever is in your heart and mind and you might be wrong, right? Okay. So you know, the important thing is just, you know, for the moment despite and speak later, and sometimes when you do that, you'll come to a place of

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calmness and invest, inshallah, what can happen, that

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you realize that you know what, I'm not so angry now and makes a difference, a huge difference, right. And the other thing is many psychologists say,

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you know, it's important that

00:30:18--> 00:30:42

you can make sure you've got to be self aware that you are not saying on negative things, they say, we know, statistically, for every five positive things you have said, share one area of concern, it must be the other way about, you know, because it always appear to be a force of finding. So that's a very, very important

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thing, right? The other thing that I think is already

00:30:49--> 00:31:12

very important is that if someone were mugged, right, once mentioned my story about inner kids that write on a sandbox, and the example of punitive boys who wrote I hate you, I hate you write in the sandbox. And after a while, the same two kids

00:31:13--> 00:31:19

visuality we start playing together. And the question is, how to do that.

00:31:22--> 00:31:49

Right? And, you know, and, and, and what do they do with the same important lesson for us, they choose happiness and monana over righteousness, you know, to be happy, more important than being right. And that's a really critical point, sometimes, in our conflicts, or whatever we deal with, we want to be right about unhappy, right. The other few points, I mean, the main issue on the ship with you,

00:31:51--> 00:31:56

even the adiz in which you are upset, and you upset them or not,

00:31:58--> 00:32:20

at least, you know, try to appear to be happy, appear to be happy, because you're past that unhappiness. And we, we know what to do with it. And the last two points on mentioned is this, that you always want, you know, our partner to change, you will be the first one to change. And the last point on returning is

00:32:21--> 00:32:55

to make sure that our issues are not taking issues, but they are substantive issues. And I know what I know, I deal with this all the time on a daily basis. And people for me in the month of Ramadan, to talk about issues and I know in some homes, you know, the mega war going on the homepage, vector field, you know, I can imagine a husband and wife not talking to each other in the month of Ramadan. And growing up, of course, the US

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is left unconnected by a violent relationship, or is unhappy on their bike, it affects the way they look at the world, it affects the way they look at each other in

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very interesting points. It is by and definitely lessons that we can draw from when the husband and not only the husband and wife, but in all disputes the point that you raised about being happy over righteousness. And I know one of the points one of the soul, the principles of the Jamaat work is that

00:33:39--> 00:33:52

you know, you can break and also you can go break a rule, but you must not break your brother's heart. And that is one of the basic principles of the Jamaat work that

00:33:53--> 00:34:06

keep the peacekeeping happiness in the Jamaat and the Jamaat, that goes out as a united Jamaat and is happy together as a return as the United chamartin is happy together, that is a successful

00:34:09--> 00:34:10

example.

00:34:13--> 00:34:36

Work effect is far better to in the frame than to win the argument you know, and it's about you know, monana sometimes if you know if you know, this is your wife, you know, this what agitator Okay, fine, I'm not gonna speak about this. Um, you know, I mentioned my calendar mentioned, I didn't need to get into an argument and this the whole point, the mistake many people make when they

00:34:40--> 00:34:55

tell me, I am an idiot goes on and on that way you know, and then when we say things that we regret for the rest of the life how often people have come and said, You know what, no, I I did treat the last house very, very angry.

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Yes, we

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Do things in the spur of the moment and then

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amendment obviously regret what you have done and what we have said afterwards. But that is what Ramadan is all about controlling the anger and being able to suppress that burning desire to to do something take action in the state of action in the state of anger.

00:35:22--> 00:35:25

Absolutely, and so inshallah

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Alana This is an opportunity

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you know, for people, opportunity for everyone inshallah, for them to really

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make amends to do the right thing. And not only that, to say to each other, you know, what mistakes in the past Why don't you, for example, do something differently and I think you know, the last thing you want to do for the last one

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is hidden for your time, and inshallah Matthews will speak to you next week. inshallah you take care Milan Allah bless you look after and protect you a

00:36:14--> 00:36:25

colleague, Mr. Mara from A to Z please camisa. speaking to us from Durban and shukran to my studio police said she can see you for listening to our message already some international this morning.

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For salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.