Women In Islam Exemplifying The Sahabiyat

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Daood Butt

Channel: Daood Butt

Topics: Women

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

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My brothers and sisters,

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he is these are all questions that I have.

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And I'm sure.

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And so what I've decided to do to chop off is

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to make this lecture a little bit shorter. And to address the questions.

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Let us know sometimes the questions are more important than the topic talking

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about something else. Right. So, we'll talk about the topic.

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And then we will address the questions that the sisters have. So let's not wait until q&a session begins to start writing down the questions because then they all come into the end of the q&a. Right. So if you have any questions, you can add them to the brothers and sisters that are

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organizing the event. And they can ask

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questions.

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So the topic women in Islam exemplifies this, I have yet

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one of the first things that comes to mind with this topic. And as a representative, it's not going to be so much about the female companions around the problems.

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Specifically, because two things that they did, the things that any of them

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are female are behavioral traits, or certain

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manners, and a way of life that each one of us needs to

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whether it comes from a male companion, or a female companion, or

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any of the scholars of the past, but we want to focus on specifically limited Charlotte.

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Roads today.

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One of the things that comes to mind when we talk about Islam and women is we try to imagine how it was at the time was approximate.

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What was it the eastern Kenyans? Especially the female companions? What was it that they were going through? What did they feel? How did they express themselves around the province?

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Are they free to ask questions? Were they allowed to go to the restroom or not? Were they stopped from doing certain things were they meant to stay? Where they

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completely banned from entering the restroom where there's no baby section, I must admit, I've seen this traveled to many countries around the world, a lot of massage that don't cater for Muslim sisters to come to the west. They just don't go ladies section, no area to go to no dedicated bathroom. Nothing is a place for the religious at all. This is not right. should not do that. So what is it that the female companions

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experienced while he was alive?

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Let's look at Khadija.

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The wife of

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everybody knows. Everybody knows, you know a certain amount of things with regards to a DJ. But one of the things that we learned from Khadija came from Africa.

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Very it's a fairly heavy

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boat, bring it to Java.

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So I'm just going to give up Manhattanites, the provinces,

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used to refer to Khadija only with the highest praise, used to speak about her as though she was the best, most beloved person to him. And we know that this is true.

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of most beloved.

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He said this way,

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and this is something that is true, but that was true. At that time, that point of time, he was about

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To her prior to that,

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he had a certain level of love and a certain level of respect and honor for some of the above.

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So the reference of it.

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He said, I have not yet found a better wife than her. She had faith in me with everyone, including my family, including my family members, and my tribe did not. She accepted that I was truly a prophet and messenger of Allah, she converted to spent all her wealth and really goods to help me spread his faith. And this too, was at a time when the entire world seemed to have turned against me and persecuted me. And it is through her that also kind of what Thailand less with children.

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Khadija from the apartment, and his wife, it shows that parents that

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goes to show us

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a few dishes,

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did things send things, and these things were all recorded? We call them the subnet, right? So whether we need recommend, we do things with the right hand, it's clean, use our left hand for things that are dirty, you know, we're honest, we're just all of these things that we learned, the sooner

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we get it wrong. rarely get these things from

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we get it from the companions that are around.

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Well, who is he around the most?

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His family members and his family members?

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or family members? Right? Obviously, you have companions. Right? I was one of the companions that was constantly with his, his close best friend was to kind of what we look at the examples of the handyman that we have the most intricate detail a

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lot of them come from the wives.

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It shows us the status that women is

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that true today we do certain acts, we live our life a certain way, through narrations that were told from women,

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for profits,

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for their children for profits.

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And this was because they were with you know, when you're inside of your house, certain things take place. And we don't know if we're on the outside.

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For example, I see certain brothers on a regular basis or interact with them on a regular basis. But there's certain things that I didn't know about them that take place inside of their houses. Similarly, when

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he was inside his house, and he dealt with certain things in specific ways. And the only way that we can learn about them is if the wives

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or the children

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relate these things to us. So the first example that we take here is the fact that much of the sooner comes from

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the family members with female family members of the profits.

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Secondly, the fact that one wife can marriage such true and authentic and, and serious idea of the problems

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shows us that women are not being undermined, women are not to be treated as a lesser sort of category in society.

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As we see, in many places today.

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Also, Khadija was mentioned in

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the intro.

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She's a person who believed in the profits.

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From day one, the very, very first person that he came to express his emotions. And what happened to him

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was

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he came to her and he said some of

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the profits

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felt comforted by her. She held him. She asked him What's wrong? What can I help you with? And which when he spoke to her, even though people were on set, he was a magician. He was a lunatic. He was crazy. He was a poet. He didn't he wasn't. He didn't know what he was talking about. He was creating all this stuff. He just

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stood by his side the entire way from the very first time that he came back and said something odd she was there to hold him. She was there to comfort him and when she

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When she asked him what exactly took place and what's going on, he explained it to her and she believed it. She took him to his to her uncle, and asked him to interpret this. What is it? Does it make sense? Is it true or reading two books? Because you're a religious person? And he said, Yes, it's true. And she believed

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that it goes to show us today, some of the things he

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tells us to do. We don't believe in it, or we do. But we have an issue with some of the issues that are raised our issues that sisters have problems with. Today's topic is about discussing misconceptions, or issues related to women. For example, why do I have to work a job? Why is it that men can marry four wives, I can only have one husband, that's not the topic of today. But these are things that a lot of people today have issues with.

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So we are not fully accepting the sudo, or not fully accepting the deal that

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gave us like,

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if the profits are wrong, it was to do something she did.

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And he helped her and she helped him at a time where not a single person in his family wanted to help him. No, they were like, Whoa, this is strange. She was like, oh, like the same is true. And one by one family members started to come into this app, one by one, they started to accept this.

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And so the example of that comes from a woman,

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how to be steadfast, how to be for how to support your spouse, how to support, you know, someone who's talking the truth. And a lot of the time you see this from sisters, even today? How many brothers are here? And how many sisters are there?

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Probably four times sisters than the amount of rows, right, based on the rows that are filled up. Pamela is to show us who is really holding this team together.

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Every single gathering that we go through every single lecture that we attend every seminar, every conference, we see that there's four times more women than men attending. What does that tell us? Who's holding this team together? Really?

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Is it the men? Are we being tough, strong guys that we are supposed to be? Or is it the women we're setting and supporting the men and pushing them and saying, No, you need to do this, this is good, this is great. Today, you're not dressed properly. Do this do that. Take the children that don't talk to children this way. They're always constantly supporting their spouse. And this is something that we learned is that women are generally seen in the back office or sitting in the back today. They're generally seen behind the scenes, right? Each one of the husbands has a wife, whoever's

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here, each one of us has a wife. And we know how much our wife supports us. You know, you go out, you're successful at your job, you're successful in society, you come home, and you're someone who stands strong, and you will honor straight up.

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credit to the one who supports

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because we know very well, most of us that are married, we know very well that it is not without the support and help push the drive that comes from either our mother, or our wife, or even our daughters, that we don't be

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the person that we are today. This is just a reality. You look at the profits. And it

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was like his backbone. She supported him throughout the time that she was alive after she passed away. Right. Let's look at another way.

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What did she do for the province?

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We just mentioned she narrated the most Hadith that any female companion of the practice of law.

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And in fact, if you look at the Hadith, you know, a lot of the time you ask questions about marriage, you ask questions about intimate

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relations between the husband and wife. We ask questions about how certain things are supposed to be done within the household. A lot. In fact, most of those ideas come from

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and that goes to show us a few things. Let's look at the example of

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Ibrahim Hassan going to the white love. His name is

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Ronnie.

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He comes to the house of his son.

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And this was the time when he

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got married and the wife of this Marian

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Did not know what it

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was. She didn't know that this was the father of her husband. So he came to, you came to visit.

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And when he was visiting him, he knocked on the door, and the wife opened the door, and he

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died. Night. And she says,

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he's gone out, you'll be back shortly. So

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divine asks the wife of this guy, this is his daughter, and she doesn't know that this is her father. Right? He asks, How? How is the How's everything? How's your batteries at home? Is everything okay? And she says, definitely, that is okay. But then she starts to complain, she starts to complain to him about certain things that takes place within their household. So in my email, he says, He says, okay, you know, at the end of this conversation, he says, When your wife, husband comes home, he comes home. And I said to him, and tell him to change the threshold of his house,

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to change the doorstep of this house, right.

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So she says, he

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comes home, and he senses that his father was there, has a feeling that his father was present. So they asks for someone here.

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And he conveys this to you. And he says, in order to tell you to change the the doorstep of your household.

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So he says, okay,

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straight up, and divorce.

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Time passes,

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gets married again. Right? Sam comes down to walk up to visit, he comes over to the house, different wife this time, from the same, but different life. Every night, someone else.

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He comes to the house,

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the wife of this bank opens up she says that it is not here. So he says, okay, Is everything all right with Him, house matters, affairs of your household, everything's fine. She says, everything seems good, everything is fine. Everything's great.

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Depending problem problems, not a single person has, you know, Rosie,

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and for those of you that are thinking, you're gonna find the right woman who lives with you and never argue with you, and two days into your marriage.

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But this is just to show us an example. He comes home afterwards. Sorry, before he comes home, Ibrahim is asking about matters of your household. She says, you know, praise me for a while everything's fine. You know,

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life is good, basically.

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So he says, okay, when he comes home and famous,

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and tell him to keep the doors that are the threshold of his household.

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So it comes back to the senses that his father was there. And so he asks, again, says, you know, did someone come? Yeah, there was a man that came. And he said, to convey this analogy, and to tell you to keep the doorstep or the threshold of your house. So he says, Okay, that was my father said to keep you the previous one. So that was my father. And he's telling me to divorce. What is the difference between the two?

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There is a difference between the two of these big

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sisters.

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What is the difference? The difference is, the first wife started to reveal things about their intimate relations are certain matters that happen within the household that is private, it stays within them. Unless there's something serious unless you're being beaten up, for example, or you're being abused, verbally abused, or something really severe, really serious, that goes against the dean, then there's a problem, then you need to come and voice it up. She was just complaining, complaining about normal things that happened in everyone's marriage. And those things usually are supposed to remain within your household, between husband and wife. This was something that actually

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was good. She was good at keeping the things that happened in our household to themselves. But yet we still have so many ideas that came out that teach us how to be within our families. This is because

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he didn't have you know, a rosy marriage. 100% It was a beautiful marriage. Yes. It was a top notch love story between

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Send them an episode.

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But they still had problems. There was a time when

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I received food from another one of the wives in the province.

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And out of jealousy, she hit the dish down on the ground out of the house in the hand of the province.

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Because she was like, offended, this is my house, how can one of the other wife send food over to my house?

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So she knows

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what to

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do?

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Did he get physically abusive,

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verbally abusive,

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he didn't even say anything. He got down on the ground. And he started to pick up the food, put it back onto the dish. And then he stood up, and he gave it to her. And he said, You prepare something for our house or our household and send it over to that house.

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That was the problem. So

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that's how you deal with these things we go through.

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We know the stories, we know how he dealt with them in times where you know, it wasn't so nice at home, but still

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showed us how we're supposed to behave. And you know, we just talked about patients this morning. And I'm pretty sure Not a single one of us here would have been that patient to pick up the phone, we probably would have kicked into our life.

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clean up the mess.

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Right, what's wrong with you? It's like using bad words and stuff like that. This is something that was not done.

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as well.

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Apart from being a good wife, and someone very close to profits, and

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she was the daughter of the best friend of the province.

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Which one of you? Okay, how many of us are American

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brothers and sisters?

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My brother's cats.

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Good number even though this is a youth program, it's

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about the youth in Singapore get very young.

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Or you can be 45 minutes.

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So

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those that are married here, who is best friends with their mother in law.

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Factory should say which one of the brothers is the best?

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I've only had one person ever stand up and asked this question, stood up and said yes. This isn't a crowd of almost 3000 people.

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Me and my father in law, we're best friends.

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How many of the sisters are best friends with their mother?

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sisters hear that sound? It's because daughter in law get along.

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The issue is really put the dishes within the glasses last year with that then they got washed at this time. Wash the dishes after we cook the food before we eat. Go wash the dishes after we cook and after we eat. And also the issue there tension between

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Are you best friends with your dog?

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I would say that my mother likes being the best as well.

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And it works. That's good. That's very good.

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And gradually utility to be the best practice to follow as well.

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That goes to show us know that the profits of alumni in the summer you know it's something unique to be married to your friends. Think of it to be married to your friend's daughter, your best friend's daughter.

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Right? Isn't that something unique? How do you deal with that situation? any single thing you do, your daughter goes and tells your best friend

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and your restaurant.

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This is your best friend. And the thing is every intricate detail. You know we all act differently inside our houses. Everyone behaves one way outside behaves differently inside. Most people can agree to that. But now your best friend is going to know everything about your life. I want you to imagine that imagine

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Mustaine comes to you and says he wants you to marry this

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person comes to you and says he wants you.

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The first thing running through your head is

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to clean up, take everything else.

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out, get rid of everything, every single thing that I do, he's gonna know he's gonna talk to the community about it, everyone's gonna know. Yeah, in the household of the province.

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It wasn't like

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they knew what to keep inside of the house, and then you want to let go. And there were certain things that go even more intimate. When it comes to relations between husband and wife. We even have those things as a description for us in Islam. But in our own life, we're supposed to keep those things to ourselves.

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Why did we do that? Why is it that we know about certain things like even intimate relations between the reference and the settlement is right. In our own life, we're supposed to keep it a secret.

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It's very simple. If the wives of the prophets have

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never told us how to live, how to be, what we can do, what we can do, how to interact with each other, and how we don't have to do.

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So the only things that were revealed to us are the things that were important and needed, and this will through the wisdom of us.

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And all of that came through.

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Let's move to another one.

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In fact, there's more that goes on.

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No, there was a time where she was being accused of having relations with another one of the competitors in the province.

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You were traveling in a caravan, she lost one of her pieces of jewelry, and the profits of

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the caravan went ahead. And actually, she got out she ran back to try and find it. And by the time she found it, she couldn't really find me.

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But there's always a trailer, always someone who moves behind the caravan. In case

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let's say there's an enemy following the companions as they travel. So this person will be far in the back and you like a day's journey or half a day's journey behind and he would trail the caravan.

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And so as he was coming, he found it showed up.

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And she remained modest. He got off his his, his camel, he put on sort of a low iron on top and came back to dinner. With the caravan arrived. She wasn't there.

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A little bit later, they arrived. Now people started to talk. This happens in our communities, right? We're starting to talk,

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gossip.

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And there's

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so much so that they

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didn't want to see or didn't even want to speak to it.

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Yet to show the status of this woman of last

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few verses

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to the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam telling him of her innocence.

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female companion having verses of unrevealed because of her to clear her, you know, false accusations to clear that up and to show that she's innocent. And this goes to show us how many of us live our life. So purely and so much in accordance to the Sunnah of a Muslim

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than a muscle can reveal versus words.

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Because a lot of us we fall short, we don't thin

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the province

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in every single way.

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This is something that the companions tried to do. It would not learn 10%

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before they implemented it and then move on to another 10. So they would learn 10 verses that were implemented in their life. And once they're living by those verses, they will move on to learning more verses.

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Like Okay,

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great. Yes.

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But

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nine months.

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What do you do? full time students are

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great, are they?

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What's the purpose behind?

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Why do you want to memorize them for nine months or one year? to memorize them? Yes, that's

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Good.

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But are we implementing the program in our life? Are we living by the program?

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Do we not ponder over? Do we think about what the program is telling us? This was the wife of the companions first revealed.

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And so it was handled, it shows us the importance of listening to the understanding, and forming the verses that are mentioned, that we can only do. So if we read the language that we understand. We pick up the translation, and we start to read some of the translation, or we sit with a chef.

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And he starts to explain to us going from verse two, verse two verse one.

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But we don't do that. And this is something

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a month one is right in front of us.

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No one is right in front of us, we ask your question,

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how many of you have read the entire

00:31:12--> 00:31:14

cover to cover in Arabic, raise your hand?

00:31:16--> 00:31:19

Just read it once, just once, if you'd like

00:31:22--> 00:31:27

to see how many people have read just once in their life?

00:31:30--> 00:31:31

Just once.

00:31:33--> 00:31:35

Okay, if you read it more than once,

00:31:37--> 00:31:38

at least once.

00:31:40--> 00:31:41

Now,

00:31:50--> 00:31:55

everyone should raise their hand, because then it would be good to ask the next question.

00:31:56--> 00:31:59

Next question is how many people have read

00:32:01--> 00:32:05

at least once in the language that they understand meaning the translation.

00:32:07--> 00:32:12

So how many people have recited or read the translation, please raise your hand.

00:32:16--> 00:32:21

What usually happens is that the majority of the people raise their hand and say,

00:32:22--> 00:32:23

Arabic,

00:32:24--> 00:32:27

but when you say, how many of you have your hands up here?

00:32:29--> 00:32:32

Once or read the translation once everyone puts their hand up.

00:32:34--> 00:32:46

And the fact is that we don't ponder over the length of time, which is literally at our doorstep, just two weeks away. And this is something that we need to do just about two weeks ago,

00:32:47--> 00:32:50

that we need to start reading

00:32:52--> 00:33:29

and understanding about it as well. So one of the things that each and every one of us to do during this month, is to pick up the translation of everything single day, read at least one page, just one page, just one, but do it throughout the entire month of Ramadan. And then continue to do that for the rest of the year. And finish the entire translation in one year. And every single day, I want you to pick out one thing that you read in that translation, and just let it let it settle into your mind. Because that will be fulfilling with the companions

00:33:31--> 00:33:49

that they used to ponder over. They still wonder what is this talking about? Why was this revealed? When did you know what was the context of revelation? when this came down? What happened? What took place? Why was this being told to us what should we do after this is taught to us? And that was how the prophets

00:33:50--> 00:33:51

taught the companions

00:33:54--> 00:33:56

who was the name of the mother it was the province.

00:34:00--> 00:34:01

They wonder

00:34:07--> 00:34:09

the mother in law of the province

00:34:10--> 00:34:12

from Africa

00:34:17--> 00:34:19

My name is Cena, also known as

00:34:21--> 00:34:35

Okay, she was one of the people who stood out during the time of the province of Obama. It was one of the female candidates who stood out. Most people don't even think of how many of us here to talk about life.

00:34:38--> 00:34:39

This is what we're talking about the life.

00:34:43--> 00:34:46

Right? We don't we don't have a backup right.

00:34:50--> 00:34:51

One knows about him

00:34:54--> 00:35:00

enough to eat and stuff like that. He was the first one he got after the death of approximately

00:35:01--> 00:35:08

Life. Nobody knows anything about his wife. There's a lot known about his wife. Nobody ever talks about her.

00:35:09--> 00:35:24

This competitive female companion, Cena, no one has ever learned. She was one of the companions who stood out in society. today. We don't we don't even recognize her. We don't even think about her we talked about

00:35:26--> 00:35:31

all the time, but we don't even ponder over who could have been that other person in their life.

00:35:32--> 00:35:42

And so Pamela, I want you to think, when you're saying that, you know, women are the backbone, the wife is the backbone of others, the backbone to society and to her husband or to her child.

00:35:45--> 00:35:50

She was the backbone of the alumni, as well as support to the

00:35:53--> 00:36:23

beautiful position you can be in, that you're not only helping and assisting your son in law, who's the Prophet, you're helping and assisting your husband, who is the first and the best friend of the province? And, you know, first was revealed about him, they're traveling during the intro. And yet you stood there and held him from behind the scenes, and nobody even talks about, are we doing justice, why we are doing justice to the history of the people that we live our life today, because of

00:36:24--> 00:36:31

their sweat and blood and everything that they add your wealth or time to family was dedicated to me.

00:36:32--> 00:36:38

They did it for the sake of us so that we can have this them today. We don't look at that.

00:36:39--> 00:36:41

She was one of the companions who

00:36:43--> 00:36:45

went with the prophets and the

00:36:47--> 00:36:51

companions. And they went to Medina during the intro stay behind

00:36:55--> 00:37:03

her. And she stayed there with her family as well. Her husband left, she stood firm, knowing that

00:37:05--> 00:37:29

to help when the Prophet needs and your husband needs, you know, that's, that's scary. Put yourself in their shoes, that they were being persecuted taken in or being thrown stones or that they were being harmed and tortured and punished. Yet she stood there was a family, and they stayed behind because that was what was conducted for them to do.

00:37:30--> 00:37:40

And so we don't look at it from that. When the Prophet sallallahu Sallam had issues between after several people find out what was his mother in law. You know, today.

00:37:44--> 00:37:49

She's always trying to do things. Don't go visit him. Right? That's

00:37:50--> 00:37:51

That's how society is.

00:37:54--> 00:37:57

set up this this woman this female companion.

00:37:59--> 00:38:11

We have today you don't get enough. Justice. We don't do honor. We don't deliver the way we're supposed to be islamically to make these people don't have to show who they are.

00:38:12--> 00:38:14

Let's look at some of the other components of

00:38:16--> 00:38:19

Somalia. Somalia, right?

00:38:25--> 00:38:26

Yes.

00:38:32--> 00:38:32

She knows it.

00:38:42--> 00:38:42

Wait,

00:38:46--> 00:38:47

who knows?

00:38:48--> 00:38:51

What does she need to be known for?

00:38:55--> 00:39:01

She was the first runner and the first person to be murdered the first person who died in

00:39:03--> 00:39:05

the very first person

00:39:07--> 00:39:17

who went out and fought in the Battle. This was a woman who stood firmly, literally she was tied up, they were being tortured. They were being you know, treated really badly by

00:39:22--> 00:39:38

a man in their heart so much so that they would not waver to the extent that one day Leah and her husband Yes, and their child and now they were being tortured, and have told her you know what? You probably only

00:39:39--> 00:39:48

because you love him, your secret lover to him, you know, he started to say some really nasty things to her. And she felt this is wrong. This is the

00:39:49--> 00:39:59

seventh you should have respect for him. So she spit in his face. And that really irritated so much so that he pulled out his dagger and shoved it right

00:40:00--> 00:40:00

to her.

00:40:02--> 00:40:24

That was how irritated he became, because she spit in his face. What was she doing? She was standing there being tortured day after day after day. And still she didn't get it. I'm just saying you don't believe in it, just say just say, just say that you don't believe in this stuff. Just say it with your mouth, we want to hear it.

00:40:26--> 00:40:35

They would not utter a single word. Why? Because of you and me, because Islam is the religion that they believe in.

00:40:40--> 00:40:41

Religion

00:40:42--> 00:40:42

in

00:40:44--> 00:40:50

Hannah's view, that he wants us to follow the religion according to this, according to

00:40:51--> 00:40:56

Islam, that is the religion that we are meant to follow. That is the religion of

00:40:58--> 00:41:06

religion of all the prophets, meaning that we submit the stone you submit, we're Muslims, when

00:41:08--> 00:41:09

most of us have not.

00:41:11--> 00:41:23

None of us have been arrested or anything. You've seen police running after someone that is a freeze. Right? The point there, are there your weapon

00:41:24--> 00:41:34

that someone has done something wrong? That's a proper, right, so someone stole broke into a shop and the police freeze? What does the person do? put their hands up?

00:41:35--> 00:41:45

What does that mean? What does that symbolize? submission symbolizes, okay, I submit, I'm stopping I'm not doing any, what do we do we start our prayer, we submit to us.

00:41:52--> 00:41:55

We are the ones who submit, submit to

00:41:56--> 00:42:00

Allah wants us to do. And we learned that from those female companions of the Prophet

00:42:02--> 00:42:10

who stood behind the scenes that not many people knew about was to have a life that wasn't for them, the dean would not be in front of us today.

00:42:13--> 00:42:42

So we ask Allah to make it easy for us to understand the lives of those dependent, the female companions of the Prophet, some of it was that most people tend to forget, and he out of, you know, lectures and so on. And so now the question is, what do we do in society today? To get them to come into our houses? What do we do? And this is for the sisters. What do you do to get them to come into your house?

00:42:47--> 00:42:52

Raise your hand and keep your hand up. Sisters only raise your hand if your father

00:42:55--> 00:42:56

still alive.

00:42:58--> 00:43:01

They hadn't Keep your hand up, raise your hand, if you have a brother.

00:43:03--> 00:43:07

Raise your hand if you have an uncle. Raise your hand if you have a husband?

00:43:09--> 00:43:14

No, no. Just say if you have any of these categories, keep your hand up.

00:43:19--> 00:43:22

Okay, help anybody not raise their hand.

00:43:25--> 00:43:26

You didn't raise your hand raise.

00:43:28--> 00:43:34

All of you raise your hands because all of you either have a father or all of you either have.

00:43:36--> 00:43:41

Or have a brother, either having or having an uncle. Meaning How do you learn?

00:43:43--> 00:44:04

Yes, you've come to these lectures comes at conferences, you come to seminars, and so on and so forth. How do you learn? you encourage these guys that are sitting in front of you, right, that are so few a number of maybe your husband, your uncle, your father, your brother, here, they live in your house. And so you came today to learn something because they don't. They don't bring them to your house. So you need to come to the house have a lot to learn.

00:44:06--> 00:44:16

So one of the things that you do is you turn to your husband, you turn to your father, you turn to your brother, turn to your son, and you say what did you do when you went to the mustard on Friday?

00:44:18--> 00:44:21

Listen to listen to what was the topic.

00:44:24--> 00:44:34

But it's only 6pm and football was like five hours ago. I know what I forgot. Okay. Don't you have a phone? Yes. Do you have a Samsung Galaxy s3? Yes.

00:44:35--> 00:44:40

Yes. All these gadgets? Yes. But you have a piece of paper and a pen? No.

00:44:42--> 00:44:52

So use the technology. Tell your children tell your husband tell your brother tell your father, really the Juma football home with you. Please bring the drama.

00:44:53--> 00:44:59

Because one of the things that we see is that the brothers and the men they go for dramatic on Fridays they go to the masjid. They benefit

00:45:00--> 00:45:06

From the fact that not many videos are sitting there, checking their Facebook accounts, because I know I see what I was doing.

00:45:08--> 00:45:19

member you can see down below what everyone's doing on their phones. So they're not paying attention to the football. One of the reasons is because you know, sometimes it is boring. But that doesn't mean that you're not supposed to

00:45:20--> 00:45:37

have to listen, one of the things that I encourage each and every one of you to do is to come into your heart to come into your house, and you need to bring it home with you. And the only way to bring it home with you is if you take a note of what the drummer football is about, and something that touched your heart.

00:45:38--> 00:45:41

And you tell it to your family. And then your family supports.

00:45:43--> 00:46:00

It tell you in three days, you forgot that the man was talking about dealing justly when you go and do business with others. And three days later, one day you say no, I'm gonna go do this. I know there's a little bit of interest involved by trying to be a big deal, I'll just pay it off. And your wife tells me,

00:46:01--> 00:46:14

you shouldn't do that. And you remember what the gentlemen football is about? And she starts to support. And this is something that we want to see in society. This is something that I encouraged. Let me ask this question, how many of the sisters here are happy?

00:46:16--> 00:46:18

How many sisters have memorized the entire 400

00:46:23--> 00:46:27

Not a single one of the sisters has raised their hands, any brothers here in

00:46:30--> 00:46:32

Singapore or

00:46:33--> 00:46:38

not seeing some more senior more, seeing less, read more.

00:46:42--> 00:46:44

Not a single half of a bride in this room.

00:46:48--> 00:46:56

This goes to show us brothers and sisters. If Slayer was murdered or murdered for the sake of a snap,

00:46:57--> 00:46:58

he just stood by

00:47:00--> 00:47:01

his

00:47:02--> 00:47:09

wife didn't do what she did. If all of these people did do what they did for me and you What are we doing for our children?

00:47:11--> 00:47:24

What are we doing for our grandchildren? What are we doing for our great grandchildren? How many of us is going to make a half half of our family members, or how many of us wants to do that?

00:47:25--> 00:47:28

How many of us want to have a child who's a half of

00:47:31--> 00:47:33

all of us, we all want to

00:47:38--> 00:47:42

die is it that we feel or once you're 30 years old, or 40 years old, we capitalize

00:47:44--> 00:48:02

on a 78 year old man in Montreal who was memorizing seven to eight years old. He's going really slow, but he's doing it and he's dedicated. And he feels I won't move forward until I make sure that I remember everything that I've already come across. So he's doing

00:48:03--> 00:48:06

I know people who are 50 6070 years old.

00:48:07--> 00:48:15

Today, we're too busy for the brand. How many of us have a smartphone, whether it's a Samsung, or iPhone,

00:48:16--> 00:48:19

or an iPad, or MacBook?

00:48:22--> 00:48:27

How many of us have application on our phones. That is

00:48:29--> 00:48:30

how many of us have a phone or

00:48:32--> 00:48:34

tablet any kind of tablet.

00:48:37--> 00:48:40

Many of us open applications this week,

00:48:42--> 00:48:42

maybe

00:48:45--> 00:48:45

this week.

00:48:53--> 00:49:38

And that just goes to show us brothers and sisters that we need to be doing more for our team. And we need to encourage one another. And in the sense that you know we have this push or this urge this drive coming from us. It's not going to work one way it's not a one sided thing. Everything is two sided. Want to have support in your life. You have to show support at home, you complain that your wife is not helping you not supporting you. What are you doing to help her learn stuff? You complain that your husband is not bringing? The home? What are you doing to help him bring them home? Did you ask him to do that? Do you ask him every single Friday? What was the job about? If you did then you

00:49:38--> 00:49:43

have no place to complain? You can't even say he doesn't teach us did you ask me that?

00:49:45--> 00:49:59

So this is where we need to work both ways. in marriage. Everything is two sided right? Everything is two sided, including when you're learning the deed. A lot of the time we only say that everything has two sides of marriage. The couple is complaining about something

00:50:00--> 00:50:18

So they come to someone for counseling to say, Okay, let's listen to your side of the story. to your side of the story, the same thing applies is, it's a two sided Street, you need to ask each other, and encourage each other, and question each other in order for the snap to enter your house. So we're going to end there

00:50:22--> 00:50:43

for a little bit more time, so we have our q&a, we have a lot of questions out here. And I felt like one of the things that the brothers were mentioning to me about this before and the issues that women have here, one of the things that was brought up was the fact that women like to wear the job, can't wear it at work.

00:50:44--> 00:51:01

So some places that they work, they never have a job, what do you do, the first thing that you do is, you start to look for a new job, right, you start to look for a new job to start to look for a different profession, to start to look for a different field to work in, or a different company.

00:51:02--> 00:51:17

Secondly, if you don't need to work sister and your husband makes enough money, then that's sufficient for that should be sufficient. But I know in Singapore, expensive, it's not gonna be that everything's expensive, you guys have too many digital needs.

00:51:19--> 00:51:27

Too many digital requirements, right. And that's something that's, you either can't escape it, or you're fighting with your boss, or you can't

00:51:30--> 00:51:33

afford a business to make millions of dollars, right.

00:51:35--> 00:51:50

So that we can make a lot of money and live lavishly. And the nice thing is, if you just have a business that makes enough money for you to survive, you can buy groceries, you can go on vacation once a year, and you can do all of those things, you don't need

00:51:51--> 00:51:54

to just be a few 1000. Right? So we have

00:51:56--> 00:52:19

to make it easy for us in that sense, to try and learn how to live authentically and implementing the meaning. And if you have to take a job off to work somewhere, and you have an option to work somewhere else, there's another alternative, meaning it's not a nationwide rule that you can work a job, and you have Options, Options, and you should go through those options.

00:52:29--> 00:52:30

Get ready.

00:52:33--> 00:52:38

I think some of the sisters or one sister had a question that you wanted to ask, right.

00:52:41--> 00:52:44

So if anyone wants to ask a question on the microphone.

00:53:07--> 00:53:08

In this era, some of

00:53:16--> 00:53:18

the speakers are facing you guys.

00:53:22--> 00:53:23

Not really my progress.

00:53:24--> 00:53:25

So fine.

00:53:26--> 00:53:32

But sometimes even when we read it's just because I did not tend to make fun of

00:53:33--> 00:53:38

my company or money is much much development traveling on your channel covering.

00:53:48--> 00:53:48

environment.

00:53:50--> 00:53:51

Sorry, I don't really understand.

00:54:12--> 00:54:14

And my question was to friends

00:54:16--> 00:54:19

by giving insensitive comments on this slide.

00:54:31--> 00:54:32

In front of

00:54:34--> 00:54:38

you sometimes even my Muslim friends, join because

00:54:41--> 00:54:42

your Muslim friends will make fun of you.

00:54:47--> 00:54:52

So how could I see? mission? How should I react to this

00:55:07--> 00:55:18

Okay, so you go to school, and people make fun of you, because they call you the terrorist, and even engage and stuff like that. What should you do?

00:55:20--> 00:55:20

Right?

00:55:21--> 00:55:22

Right?

00:55:23--> 00:55:25

It's very simple question. Well,

00:55:30--> 00:55:31

first of all,

00:55:33--> 00:55:34

why do you work a job?

00:55:41--> 00:55:48

For the sake of Allah to please the loss of habitat? So when you see is awesome.

00:55:49--> 00:55:52

This ties in a little bit with your question they were asking you for

00:55:53--> 00:55:53

you please.

00:55:55--> 00:56:04

You will naturally these some people, and some people will be displeased with you. For example, I just finished getting to talk.

00:56:05--> 00:56:09

Some of you will be happy with what I said, some of you were not happy with what I said.

00:56:10--> 00:56:11

But you're doing it to

00:56:13--> 00:56:21

yourself doing things to please other people. They're making fun of you. So you want to take your job off to please them.

00:56:22--> 00:56:27

But I'm just saying some women do that, right. So they take your job off to please others so that they don't make fun of them. And

00:56:28--> 00:56:32

you will never please everyone. And all above.

00:56:34--> 00:56:49

So your main goal in life, just to please go off. And along the way, you will have some people that are pleased with you. And some people that are don't. And that doesn't matter. Because your goal is to please don't care, even if the people aren't pleased, it doesn't matter to you.

00:56:50--> 00:57:03

But if you do things to these people, a lot will not be normal, some people as well. So the main thing is to have a loss of pleasure. Now, what do you do with that situation?

00:57:04--> 00:57:33

You're trying to explain it to them, if you can write the importance of pointing out why you're better at the job, you know, what exactly it does for you. It might make you feel more modest and stuff like that. It might protect you from harm that's outside on the streets, and so on and so forth. There are so many benefits of brands that are not associated to me. And there's other benefits, you can mention those things. Because sometimes people make fun of us.

00:57:35--> 00:57:49

Especially if they call you names like terrorists and stuff like that. These people don't want to hear anything about religion. They just want to know why you do it. What's the purpose, what's the reason for doing. So you leave that aside with a

00:57:50--> 00:57:59

few examples. But don't get yourself lost. Don't get yourself lost in trying to teach them no at the back of your head and in your heart that you're doing this to please

00:58:01--> 00:58:14

not to please anybody else. When you do that, you will feel happy, you will feel pleasure and you will not need to make the people accept you for who you are, because you will accept who you are because of the boss.

00:58:15--> 00:58:25

You will accept the fact that I wear this. And they will say that people say things about me, let them say things about No, I use this example sometimes.

00:58:26--> 00:58:32

for 900 students in the school, three of them are Muslim. I was one

00:58:33--> 00:58:38

of 900 students, only three Muslim, I used to

00:58:39--> 00:58:39

work

00:58:41--> 00:58:44

for both. And I used to go into pocket that time.

00:58:45--> 00:59:09

So I had a turban on my head, right. That's how I went to high school in Canada. And there were only two other Muslims in my school. They have some kind of luck. When you do it to please a lot, you'll see that people will respect you so much more. You'll notice that you know, the more you try and do it for the pleasure also kind of the easier it becomes the less of a struggle.

00:59:10--> 00:59:13

And so you know, he likes it. For example, I just have to go over.

00:59:14--> 00:59:16

I never needed to be

00:59:18--> 00:59:19

permission slip.

00:59:21--> 00:59:27

I never needed that. It was 12 o'clock, I would go straight to the office just waiting for the window. And

00:59:29--> 00:59:50

every Friday, this is his routine. We know him we trust him. We respect the fact that he's going to pray. And in fact we came to a point on my second to last year every single Friday from there up until I graduated two years. Every single time I left the security guards at the front door as well as the lady inside the office she would always say make sure you pray for us to

00:59:53--> 00:59:59

make sure that the reference and the lady inside the counseling department the guidance later

01:00:00--> 01:00:32

She used to come to me sometimes, and say, This is the guidance counselor at the school, who was a student go to ask for guidance. She would come to me and say, you know, please pray for my daughter, she's University she's getting this anonymous lady was telling me to pray for her mother and daughter, who goes to university and drinks alcohol and sleeps and dies every single week is different. And she's coming to ask me to mentor hassle guidance from a bar concert.

01:00:35--> 01:00:42

And so this is what happens more you put your trust in us, you'll see that the doors will open for you, things will become easier

01:00:43--> 01:00:45

to deal with those people in a much easier fashion.

01:01:17--> 01:01:22

Upon facing a trial associated with one's negative thoughts,

01:01:25--> 01:01:34

that affects one's humanity. How does one train his thoughts? So he can be nice?

01:01:41--> 01:01:54

Okay, so when a person faces a trial that affects their event, how do you train yourself? How you train your thoughts? To be a peace of mind? Peace of heart, right? Very simple.

01:01:55--> 01:02:08

It's easier said than done. But it's very simple. You try and put your trust in Allah Subhana. Allah through the things that we said in the first lecture. Okay, those four things that we say you're trying to put your trust in the muscle,

01:02:09--> 01:02:26

by having patience, and training yourself throughout those four things that you mentioned in the first lecture. So through those steps, right, you'll be able to recognize I'm facing a trial now, okay, you'll be able to get past it. Why? Because I went through a trial before I got past it.

01:02:28--> 01:02:36

How do I get past it? Because the size of a wire over me was bountiful, he blesses us with so many things. So why should I

01:02:37--> 01:02:42

write so you go through those steps and have patience to get yourself through it?

01:02:45--> 01:02:49

How should one face the trial of people's bad speech for treatment?

01:02:51--> 01:02:58

of refrain to insults, slander, backbiting, etc? How should one come to terms with such treatment?

01:03:04--> 01:03:19

Okay, that's interesting. So now the second part of this question is, can the one that's being oppressed, this case, used as a weapon against against the one who's oppressing the oppressor? So can they

01:03:20--> 01:03:21

be oppressed?

01:03:22--> 01:03:23

against the oppressor?

01:03:25--> 01:03:28

You can use, you know,

01:03:30--> 01:03:40

try and leave this to your last resort. In fact, you should try not to do this. And this is something that it was done. Yes. But the problem is

01:03:42--> 01:03:47

that someone who's oppressed is accepted. And I'll give you an example.

01:03:51--> 01:04:05

So this is an example of someone who actually was being oppressed and mental health what is punish this person who's who's doing something bad to their family, right, making life really difficult for their family. And, you know, his father was was still

01:04:07--> 01:04:11

healthy and stuff like that. And so when someone was oppressing their family certainly draft

01:04:12--> 01:04:19

up this punish this person for what they're doing this is wrong, and some kind of on the next one in that phone call saying that, you know, that person passed away.

01:04:21--> 01:04:22

And so he was like,

01:04:24--> 01:04:25

that's really bad. I need to

01:04:27--> 01:04:35

stay away from them. And one of the things that we do, right, we hear this into my football, we hear people making

01:04:37--> 01:04:53

against those that are pressing around. It's very severe and very stern, very strict, very harsh. punish these people over do this to those people to that to those people. Yes, your question. If george bush walks through that door right now, what would you do?

01:05:01--> 01:05:03

He wants to know, security and nothing

01:05:04--> 01:05:06

is starting to walk towards me.

01:05:15--> 01:05:17

And that's good, why? Maybe

01:05:19--> 01:05:28

he's coming through the doors that he wants to sit down and listen, for. He's thinking of executives. And so he comes in, he wants to listen, and he wants to benefit.

01:05:29--> 01:05:33

But yet, you just want to jump on it. Even though he might say, you know what I accepted.

01:05:37--> 01:05:38

This is probably the people that

01:05:43--> 01:05:47

that's not how we're supposed to behave. That is not how we're supposed to behave.

01:05:48--> 01:05:52

If you see someone who's oppressing others, make your actual

01:05:53--> 01:05:58

guide, this person guide will guide this person guide that person

01:05:59--> 01:06:37

is that person that has so much power that they can oppress others in other countries, that's a good person to have on your side of meeting, this person comes to them, they're very powerful person, this person in the right training directors, knowing how to use their power and strength, they can be very beneficial to changing the world to be a better place. They can use the power and strength that they have to be able, they can use the power strength and have to rebuild the societies that they damaged. There's so many different things that we can do. We don't make those kinds of drives. Has anyone ever made a roll off these guys? George Washington, some

01:06:39--> 01:06:41

of these guys? No, sir.

01:06:43--> 01:06:54

We shouldn't do that we should do, we should ask for lots of goodness for people. Because the Prophet said he didn't want to destroy our people. In essence.

01:06:56--> 01:07:07

That was the thing. That's what people think about us. That's what people think about us things, that we just want all the bad people to go away and just destroy. That's not true.

01:07:08--> 01:07:14

There were people that were allowed to live within the Islamic State. There were people who were Muslims,

01:07:16--> 01:07:19

non Muslims in a proper manner. And the prophets

01:07:21--> 01:07:29

asked a lot further, he died. And the angels came and asked the proxy, want us to destroy all the people of

01:07:30--> 01:07:30

that area?

01:07:32--> 01:07:34

Want us to destroy them? Because they were oppressing the profits of the

01:07:38--> 01:07:40

angels get to it?

01:07:48--> 01:07:49

No, no.

01:07:51--> 01:08:18

Because he had hope. He said, I hope that there will be good and righteous people who come out of their property, good righteous people who come from those, those oppressors. So he made to have for them. And some people supported the Prophet some years later, when they moved off to Medina. So many of those people who were oppressing him in black and white, were the ones who supported

01:08:20--> 01:08:20

and so

01:08:22--> 01:08:31

suppose, goodness for others, how do we face the trial of people's bad speech treatment, you deal with it in a wise way.

01:08:32--> 01:08:33

constantly making

01:08:35--> 01:08:51

constantly remembering the last time when people annoyed me, the first thing you do is your blood starts to rush, right? You start to get annoyed, your bloods rushing, you just want to say something back and you don't know how to control yourself, like you can get physically abusive and start to fight them. You know, but

01:08:53--> 01:08:58

if you will, only to remember and constantly that we do not want to fight

01:08:59--> 01:09:08

back or blood pressure will be so calm. So patient, to kind of I see that in some brothers. Firstly, a lot of offers.

01:09:10--> 01:09:10

I don't get

01:09:12--> 01:09:14

in my life, but I'm not a Congress.

01:09:16--> 01:09:27

Again, I get irritated. No one's going to be this way. Right? I know some people will go through such hardship, if they're so patient, because they're close to a loss.

01:09:28--> 01:09:41

They see the importance of constant. And when they're faced with people, you know, talking to them swearing at them. You know, I've had people come to my wife in Canada and say, you know, when you take this thing off your face,

01:09:42--> 01:09:55

people come to me and say, take the leash off of your dog, my wife because she's so basic that I forced her to wear it. Right. So they told me to take the leash off my dog was referring to my wife and these are things that are sent to you

01:09:58--> 01:09:59

to be patient with you.

01:10:00--> 01:10:09

Because when you're patient, you show an example to most people, they come to you and they start to get angry with you. And they say something bad about you. And you just say, you have a good day.

01:10:11--> 01:10:24

God bless. You walk away, or you smile, and you continue on the way. That irritates them. You irritates them. This is what my younger brother, my younger brother,

01:10:28--> 01:10:58

he taught me something which is so true. Because anytime someone comes to you, and says something to you about Islam or anything, that was not really practicing, it's not trust me, it'll never even go. Right. But he's, he's the type of guy that he loves people. He respects people, you can be in any religion, he respects you, right? Because when people come to you, and they say something bad to you, by the way, you're dressed and stuff like that, just smile, and walk away.

01:11:06--> 01:11:07

Walk away.

01:11:13--> 01:11:14

Seriously, gonna try it.

01:11:16--> 01:11:18

I tried it, it works

01:11:20--> 01:11:23

really well, because you're laughing and your blood is

01:11:25--> 01:11:29

irritated. And the other person is just so agitated, like,

01:11:30--> 01:11:38

being so calm when I'm getting in their face, talking to them about their vision, denouncing them, and telling them you know what, this is bad, don't do it.

01:11:39--> 01:11:42

I get this, they get this impression from you that you're like

01:11:44--> 01:11:53

this person, and someone confronts them about their religion. So the curious, did become curious about this. Like, how is it that

01:11:56--> 01:11:57

you can

01:12:02--> 01:12:15

get curious people are curious. Human beings were curious, we tried to try to get down to people in different ways. You know, don't don't just have people out loud, like your brother saying just because as soon as you

01:12:17--> 01:12:36

smile at people, it's a sadaqa. And for the listeners into southern pines, but it makes me feel good for the novices. It makes them feel good as well. Those that are nice as being nice and gentle. Right? walk by and you say good morning, how are you? Good evening, good night. But those that are making you smile at them in the sense that it is

01:12:37--> 01:13:00

you're giving power to them, you're smiling at them, even when they hate you. You smile at them, they become curious, they start to read about this very simple example is September 11. Right when the Twin Towers were hacked, what happened in North America in the US specifically, and every single bookstore chapters Amazon, every single bookstore had zero copies of

01:13:01--> 01:13:03

zero also

01:13:04--> 01:13:09

also helped. You can not get an English translation. For two weeks.

01:13:11--> 01:13:13

Every single person wanted to know what is this number about?

01:13:15--> 01:13:17

We looked at it as something that's probably

01:13:18--> 01:13:29

1000s of people became Muslim after September 11 1000s. More coming to the masjid sitting down school spirit contact in the masjid. We want to bring the children to come and learn about

01:13:31--> 01:13:42

what really, and this is something good. So when people do something harsh to you, make you feel bad for your religion. Say something nice smile to them, you don't know the wisdom that

01:13:43--> 01:13:49

puts in that smile of yours. You may change the face of the earth just with your smile, just

01:13:51--> 01:13:51

ask

01:13:55--> 01:13:57

whatever are the best times to make your app

01:14:00--> 01:14:02

I know part of the answer but

01:14:05--> 01:14:08

the best times to be wrong are many good times to make

01:14:10--> 01:14:13

one of the best ones to make when you're in bucha

01:14:15--> 01:14:17

you're standing in front of the camera.

01:14:18--> 01:14:19

So

01:14:21--> 01:14:22

you have to go there first.

01:14:24--> 01:14:33

If you go for Hajj onbroad you're standing in front of the camera will be in the Blackstone at the door of the camera. Maybe Perhaps

01:14:34--> 01:14:38

that is a good time to be. Also anytime you're there.

01:14:40--> 01:14:59

Like here in Singapore, when is a good time to make your Friday, all day on Friday, all day all night. Why? Because if I ask you what do you know, that tells us about the time that we should pay for our trading. Some people will say in the morning after other people will say at noon.

01:15:00--> 01:15:07

Others will say just after the first football between the second football, you know that the amount of sense that

01:15:08--> 01:15:10

other people will say between

01:15:11--> 01:15:36

others will say just before but some people will say in the middle of the night. Why do you say all these things because there's so many libertarians. So one of the things that I tell people to do this, every single minute on Friday take advantage of the right incentives created on Friday. On a Friday, he died on the Friday, the day of judgment will be on the Friday, Friday is a special day, it is a day where I was

01:15:37--> 01:15:44

blessed us, it is the aid of our week. And it is a day filled with blessing and forgiveness. So we should seek

01:15:45--> 01:15:54

forgiveness and his help throughout Friday. So one of the things that we should do is all day long on Friday, as we're walking or working, we're singing

01:15:56--> 01:15:57

are asking

01:15:58--> 01:16:10

me constantly, we don't need to stand and raise your hands. Raise your hands to be proud. We can be proud of different times when you're walking in your shoes coming out here on your computer, you can make drive to

01:16:12--> 01:16:24

work, there's so many times that you can meet up sometimes we're sitting down waiting for a lecture to start, we're sitting down waiting for somebody to start and we don't do anything just sitting there staring, staring at the wall staring

01:16:25--> 01:16:26

Why don't you

01:16:29--> 01:16:55

ask Allah for forgiveness, ask him for you know mercy asking for blessings. Those are things that we should do other good times to be violent on Fridays generally, also before sellout. So before you start praying, go to the cluster differently. For instance, one time to sit down before granting for hospital must transmit data between the mother and the beginning of Sona

01:16:57--> 01:16:58

institute

01:16:59--> 01:17:00

that is

01:17:02--> 01:17:03

closest to a loss of

01:17:04--> 01:17:10

incision. Right. So sit down, sorry, stay down Institute with your grant, I think

01:17:15--> 01:17:24

there are many times before projects before budget offering. Very good time to make, right. So there's many things that we can use. To me.

01:17:26--> 01:17:40

That shows us how merciful and less empathetic is. Give me an example. Those people right there worship the stars or the sun or the moon or whatever. Imagine someone who worships the moon, right?

01:17:41--> 01:17:50

It's now 330 in the afternoon, they want to make the drive to their father who's the moon, they have to wait another few hours before they can make

01:17:58--> 01:18:07

the beauty wisdom in the last panel. anytime of the day or night. Wherever you are, you can call upon a boss.

01:18:08--> 01:18:11

That is just the beauty of the stuff that's

01:18:13--> 01:18:17

giving us the ability to constantly be in touch with it. We don't have to wait right?

01:18:20--> 01:18:21

He's asked me something

01:18:23--> 01:18:30

at any time, just you don't even need to raise your hands. If you're in public and you feel shy. Just make

01:18:31--> 01:18:34

sure that you're sitting in the bustle of our team, whatever it is.

01:18:43--> 01:18:47

How does a person maintain patience even after so long waiting,

01:18:48--> 01:18:50

and nothing changes for the better.

01:18:51--> 01:18:58

Maybe that thing that you're asking for is not good for you, you just don't know. So accept what I

01:18:59--> 01:19:41

gave you and move on. Accept the situation that you're in and move on. Right? Don't wait for something to happen or wait for change. Don't wait for something, put your trust in a muscle and move on. Get yourself out of that, that difficult time applications and trust that things will get better for you and make them get better by doing so. You know, I know some people for example, their their mother passed away. They'll sit there for years and years every time they they're depressed. You know, they go to work and drive home from work. They're depressed. It's just constantly being depressed from nothing. You're gonna die.

01:19:43--> 01:19:46

We're all gonna die. So your mother died. Your mother passed away.

01:19:47--> 01:19:48

She's no longer

01:19:49--> 01:19:59

going to be with your children. Why yours? Why are you oppressing their children by being depressed, unhappy, treat them nicely. Go out with your family.

01:20:01--> 01:20:06

Get your mind off of the trials or the difficult things that you're going through. And then gradually,

01:20:07--> 01:20:23

knowing that either is good to accept your drive, and we can change now, or you will give you your warning, figure out what to expect something to happen. You don't know what's best one knows what is best for you. Maybe you're asking for the wrong thing.

01:20:24--> 01:20:28

gratis, best, whatever is out there for us.

01:20:35--> 01:21:05

How do we control our impulse to confide in people, we have problems and turns to a loss of power immediately. This is something that sometimes is a problem. You know, when kids go through difficult times, they go through issues in life, they turn to others. They go, okay, you, you're a good listener, let me talk to you. If you're going to counseling in someone's marriage, you can talk to them about this issue. Right? before you ask other people. One of the biggest problems is that we don't turn to a muscle.

01:21:07--> 01:21:18

How many people here wake up for 200? Don't even raise your hands. We don't want to know. But ask yourself, how many people wake up for 200? Right? If you don't wake up

01:21:20--> 01:21:27

and ask yourself, are you really trying to get to a ball? Are you really trying to protect yourself with

01:21:30--> 01:21:30

a time

01:21:32--> 01:21:33

that you're closest to a

01:21:34--> 01:21:39

loss of habitat, it comes down to the heavens of the earth, you are so close to

01:21:40--> 01:21:55

your closest to your pillow and ask yourself, how do you want to receive things from the data if you're not trying to get closer to. So we need to try and learn how to get closer to a hustle.

01:21:57--> 01:22:03

Rather than thinking something's gonna happen for us. And you know, we're just making perhaps luxury times

01:22:05--> 01:22:11

making drive luxury times whatever time is suitable for me, meaning I never made one until you know, I come to the lecture at

01:22:15--> 01:22:22

times where you have to make an effort to make you want to get a PhD degree at some universities that have worked for

01:22:23--> 01:22:24

patients in your life.

01:22:26--> 01:22:27

You got to work by using the muscles.

01:22:30--> 01:22:33

But you need to try, just try somewhere and

01:22:40--> 01:22:49

maintain a healthy relationship with a bustling town with data and thoughts, games and women with the worldly entertainments

01:22:57--> 01:22:58

you start,

01:23:01--> 01:23:12

you start by fulfilling the commands of the muscle on start by doing whatever is compulsory upon you to do that first,

01:23:13--> 01:23:16

a lot of us will try to do so many extra things.

01:23:18--> 01:23:23

We are trying to do so many extra things, you want to read the book on one color, we want to do so many things during the

01:23:25--> 01:23:55

time that he wants us to be constant in our garden. Rather than doing so many things during the month of a month, and nothing for 11 months of the year. What the companions of the Prophet SAW did was once a month of Ramadan, they would perfect the actions that they were doing. It was a time for them to perfect the actions that they did throughout the year. Meaning that they were constantly doing those things.

01:23:56--> 01:24:01

On cane, it was a time to make sure that this was perfect. Right? I got my

01:24:04--> 01:24:26

car fast and regularly. Yes, I'm doing these things on a regular basis. Now what they can do is they've been trying to do a few extra things. By perfecting an action, you need to obviously add to it, right. So you want to pray out regularly. Once a pray five times a day, in order to perfect praying five times a day need to make sure that

01:24:30--> 01:24:38

you want to make sure that you pray five times a day. protect those five times by paying extra sooner. Right so

01:24:40--> 01:24:43

for example, make sure that invader to sue them before

01:24:44--> 01:24:46

the sun goes down the

01:24:47--> 01:24:56

list goes on you're made sure that you maintain them. One day your learning will get easier and you might not crave so for example, one day after

01:24:57--> 01:24:58

a rush and I skipped it

01:25:00--> 01:25:12

Okay, that's, that's fine. That's the point is that you're not skipping the compulsory prayer you're skipping the sooner. Right. So now you become the person who's reading five times a day. And you're particularly

01:25:14--> 01:25:22

feel that sometimes you miss your son, or you're starting to become amazing with your son. So creating more traffic. So after modeling,

01:25:23--> 01:25:23

and then

01:25:26--> 01:25:30

why? Because some days you feel lazy and you're not afraid enough, but you're still.

01:25:32--> 01:25:49

So protect your prayers. And that's what the article and journal a bond, right, in order to build on an action to perfect it you have to build. So in order to perfect your slide, you need to build this in order to perfect good. So now we need to build with winter. Sorry.

01:25:50--> 01:25:51

And the same thing goes for.

01:25:53--> 01:26:06

Start by revising what you already memorized. Right? Once you've got that out, now start to learn more, but make sure you still maintain. So you have to keep building on things in order to perfect. And this is the this

01:26:09--> 01:26:10

is to do.

01:26:15--> 01:26:20

What are other ways to increase faith and patience?

01:26:26--> 01:26:30

Okay, faith wants to increase. What do you do?

01:26:32--> 01:26:34

A lot of the time when people say

01:26:35--> 01:26:41

I want to increase my email, I feel as though my email is going down. So I'm gonna go for it.

01:26:43--> 01:26:59

Right? People say that, right? Has anyone Has anyone done that they feel as though their amount is going down to like, Okay, I need to go for Hajj, I need to do something drastic in my life, that's going to change the way that is just uplifted.

01:27:01--> 01:27:11

That's, that's good. That's not really useful. Right? It's good. But it's not really useful. One of the things that you can do to increase your, you know,

01:27:13--> 01:27:21

a lot of people will think of something very Islamic. But you need to think outside of the box. You see someone crossing the street.

01:27:23--> 01:27:33

They're healthy, they're fine. But they're holding groceries, a lot of them. So you put the rest of them. And you can take it from their hands and say, let me help you. Let me help

01:27:36--> 01:27:36

you

01:27:39--> 01:27:46

appreciate, or you go to a marketing blog, you guys don't have to pay for parking here, right?

01:27:47--> 01:27:50

payment is automatic, every parking lot.

01:27:53--> 01:28:08

Just automatically. Okay, let's use another example. You go to a store, right, and someone is buying a bottle of water, and you see them there behind the mic. So you're calm, you're buying something you're paying. And you see that they have, you know, two or three things in their hand, that only cost me a few

01:28:10--> 01:28:10

dollars

01:28:13--> 01:28:14

$1 $2 $3 $5.

01:28:15--> 01:28:41

So but the thing is, what you do to increase your demand is you look for ways of doing good things. Look for ways of easing a muscle by helping others when no one else is paying attention to that. So you're paying for your stuff. You see someone else in mind. You say, Okay, I've got to tell the cashier, cashier pay for their stuff to you don't even know that person is

01:28:42--> 01:28:43

just like, Nah, that's okay.

01:28:47--> 01:28:56

And then that's it, you just walk away. Or you see someone who's usually I use the car from the parking lot and someone who's parking their car, you're going to tell the guide on how to pay for this parking as well.

01:28:57--> 01:28:59

Look for ways

01:29:01--> 01:29:07

that are outside of the norm outside of just okay, I want to raise my human so I need to pray more.

01:29:08--> 01:29:16

But I'm not really praying. So how do I raise my email so that I start praying, right? I want to raise money. So fast, more money to

01:29:17--> 01:29:27

ask for that's a problem that people have is weak. I don't pray, tell me to pray in order to raise money. Because I don't do that in the first place. I want to raise money.

01:29:29--> 01:29:43

So think of things that are not directly related in the sense that it's not legislation. Right. So like I said, aid for other people to do things to help others. go and visit someone who's sick. Again to

01:29:46--> 01:29:56

go to the hospital, go to like the cancer Ward and go visit a child whose main they're completely bald, no eyebrows, go and visit that job.

01:29:57--> 01:29:58

Guaranteed.

01:29:59--> 01:29:59

guarantee

01:30:00--> 01:30:00

Do you

01:30:02--> 01:30:05

go and visit people regularly? Go to a different port

01:30:08--> 01:30:14

than the six people in the hospital, your email will skyrocket. And this is something that we should do

01:30:15--> 01:30:20

rather than encourage us to visit sick people, because it's something that keeps us in

01:30:22--> 01:30:39

the graveyard. What was this a graveyard? series one. And basically men go and see where you can follow janazah directly follow into the cemetery and go and put dirt on top of that person's bottom. Go and know that that's where you're

01:30:40--> 01:30:49

really fast. And if you do that regularly, you're a strong, so we ask Allah to make that easy for us.

01:31:01--> 01:31:03

Now, I still have all these questions before.

01:31:05--> 01:31:06

Now.

01:31:26--> 01:31:37

Okay, the child is constantly fighting and fighting with his parents is trying times for the mother. Yes, I didn't tell her to be patient. What is the

01:31:41--> 01:31:43

advice? I mean, there's so many out there.

01:31:47--> 01:31:48

But again,

01:31:49--> 01:31:53

a lot of the time we feel as though we need to recite a specific.

01:31:55--> 01:31:58

Why? Why do you need a specific

01:31:59--> 01:32:27

time to say what you want? And to turn to a one say, is it easy for my wife who's going through this difficult time with raising children I know it's hard, I work a lot, it's not easy. Please make it easy for me to do that. You don't need to have a specific drive asked a lot from your heart. That's where it means something not just memorizing, you know, I write it down for you and then you go after it like

01:32:31--> 01:32:33

that's not sincere.

01:32:34--> 01:32:51

He sincerely wants you to ask your heart. So turn to a lot I can give you the drive to recite, I can give you should just turn to a lot asking in the language that you feel comfortable in. There's no specific requirement that I need to speak to a boss

01:32:53--> 01:32:54

I need to communicate

01:32:55--> 01:33:08

in a simulated replication is the one you're comfortable with. As you feel you are able to communicate with each other and speak from your heart.

01:33:14--> 01:33:24

If we see someone doing something wrong, and we feel like we will be able to advise them wisely. Should we just be silent about it? And just make

01:33:37--> 01:33:39

some long articles see something

01:33:41--> 01:34:24

something that's not good something bad, bad habit for example, someone smoking, right often advise them. So you try to advise them as best as you possibly can. But you will be in this part of the problem some a lot of a sudden says change that state that person or that that incident whatever is taking place, change it by using your hand meaning the law whatever legislations are there, right? This is also the government or the rulers, the leaders they take part in, if you can, let's say your parents and yes you take initiative, right child doesn't want to go out to visit playing video games all the time. With a video game. Right to get away. No need to need to prioritize.

01:34:27--> 01:34:33

So you can't do that. If you can't change the situation, someone smoking a pack, we're gonna go buy another pack.

01:34:34--> 01:34:37

Then advise them, tell them saving

01:34:39--> 01:34:45

cigarettes is really bad. It's hurting your health. And I'm talking to the smoke outside justice.

01:34:48--> 01:34:52

And if you still can't do that, not capable of doing it.

01:34:55--> 01:34:59

Use your hearts in the sense. don't like doing ask them

01:35:00--> 01:35:02

paddle pilots help this person big rock

01:35:04--> 01:35:43

is amongst one of the lowest levels of emf when it comes to changing or getting rid of both. Glucose is bad. So you know, try to do it if you have the power and capability to change that situation physically, like for example, if you're a parent, which is probably one of the only ways that you can physically change it, or it's your brother or sister, or even if it's yourself, you know, you have an issue that you keep buying magazines that you should not be looking at. Take all the vaccines that you have that are you bought, throw them away, throw away, get rid of them, right, and then don't find out and stuff like that. So take physical action in Canada, but don't start doing

01:35:43--> 01:35:44

anything serious.

01:35:56--> 01:35:57

regards to the question regarding

01:35:59--> 01:36:05

to where there are some jobs that require them to be inside that job.

01:36:11--> 01:36:12

That job sector

01:36:13--> 01:36:40

for example, we need Muslim doctors, engineers and nurses to serve the community in the Muslim community. In Singapore nurses are not allowed to wear hijab, if Muslim nurses were to find other jobs alternatives such as working as a nurse in other countries and Singapore behind vile things. Nurses, pence. Okay. Any nurses in Singapore? Is it permissible to have private health practice?

01:36:41--> 01:36:43

Can you be a private doctor to

01:36:44--> 01:36:59

private clinic? private clinics have their own nurses, right? There's no laws that say that the nurse in a private clinic can work the job. She just can't reconcile a government hospital right? So she can still work in

01:37:01--> 01:37:13

the US The alternative is that you find a doctor say Hey, buddy, we got 30 nurses here. You're the doctor let's open a clinic and do this the Muslim way. Right let's open a Muslim.

01:37:16--> 01:37:16

This

01:37:18--> 01:37:25

is a crime think outside of the box. Right? The last thing you want is to have no female doctors and nurses.

01:37:38--> 01:37:42

Nowadays their youth using music to spread the deen whatever limitations?

01:37:44--> 01:37:46

What is accepted

01:37:47--> 01:37:48

rulings?

01:37:50--> 01:38:02

Using using to spread the deen is something that is still not permissible. Right? If there's musical instruments in it. I don't know what the scholars here in Singapore say, Malaysia when they

01:38:08--> 01:38:12

write the music is something that is not permissible. So I follow that.

01:38:14--> 01:38:17

I don't enforce it in Singapore, Malaysia.

01:38:19--> 01:38:40

Right scholars in the major Afro Malaysia follow the scholars of religion. Now, when it comes to this, my opinion, my opinion is that no music is not permissible. Therefore using it as a means of Dawa itself is not permissible as well, in order to make an ad use off. Right? You don't turn off? All

01:38:43--> 01:38:51

right, a very simple example is, you know, you want to pray once a piece of muscle memory to have more. So instead of praying to to

01:38:52--> 01:38:53

pray for,

01:38:54--> 01:38:57

right, it's tempting to fault to compulsory

01:38:59--> 01:39:06

pay for or you pay 666 100% for the first

01:39:08--> 01:39:08

one and the second

01:39:10--> 01:39:12

one left late in the first second.

01:39:15--> 01:39:15

Even when I'm going to

01:39:17--> 01:39:18

put my hands on the back of

01:39:20--> 01:39:21

my back because it's harder to

01:39:25--> 01:39:31

try and do things to get closer to the bottom by using deals that are not pleasing to all right.

01:39:40--> 01:39:45

This is a good question. Sorry, sisters. I think this was written by sister so we're going to assume that

01:39:46--> 01:39:50

we see our other sisters are taking up a job.

01:39:52--> 01:39:52

However,

01:39:54--> 01:39:59

how they behave in public is not so modest how to advise this

01:40:00--> 01:40:00

Basically,

01:40:04--> 01:40:18

the way that you behave in public is not honest. This is a problem that we see with people. I will say this easily. And I discussed this with my wife many times, right? My wife, I said, Where's the cop? We talked about this all the time. Some people were in the pub.

01:40:20--> 01:40:38

Right? They were it, but their behavior is still not right. Right? Which means that people don't understand why they're wearing what they wear. You don't understand why you're waking up, because you still don't show with reverence, you have a much greater conversation. Bunch of rows.

01:40:40--> 01:40:43

That make sense, right? So your behavior

01:40:44--> 01:41:06

will only change when you understand why it is that you're doing this. Why do you work in a job? What is the purpose of the job? What What does it do to you as a Muslim system, you need to wear a job that understand why you're wearing does anyone can wear it, the people who wear it get frustrated, too humid outside and don't forget a

01:41:07--> 01:41:17

reason why. Because they don't understand why they married in the first place. Which comes back to the parents. Parents don't teach their children, why they do what they do.

01:41:19--> 01:41:20

teach children why we

01:41:22--> 01:41:24

don't teach children why we even

01:41:25--> 01:41:28

they don't teach children why they have to work things out. They just say, Well,

01:41:30--> 01:41:30

God,

01:41:31--> 01:41:32

what is asleep, wake up.

01:41:36--> 01:41:42

One of the one of the things that we have to do when it comes to children is learn from as we were all children,

01:41:43--> 01:41:51

like to be a child, one of the things that children do all the time constantly. And it's a three letter word. Wow.

01:41:52--> 01:41:53

Why?

01:41:54--> 01:41:59

Why? Why? especially to the three to five, five year old children.

01:42:08--> 01:42:10

I mean, why? Why

01:42:12--> 01:42:13

are Why are

01:42:19--> 01:42:27

these mistakes that we do as parents, we forget that. And even ourselves, we don't know why we do half the things we do

01:42:29--> 01:42:30

have to walk around the campus?

01:42:33--> 01:42:35

You have to go into it several times.

01:42:38--> 01:42:42

Why? Why are you doing this? Because we have to do it.

01:42:44--> 01:42:49

You believe in these things? You're gonna find out why you're doing otherwise you're not believing

01:42:54--> 01:42:54

in

01:42:56--> 01:43:05

our own selves. Why do we do this and explain to others why we do it? Because that's the only way I can understand and the only way to get closer to

01:43:07--> 01:43:08

our

01:43:14--> 01:43:15

office.

01:43:19--> 01:43:20

Today I

01:43:22--> 01:43:23

discovered the power of using the

01:43:26--> 01:43:27

technological

01:43:31--> 01:43:31

right.

01:43:47--> 01:43:48

People are laughing

01:43:58--> 01:44:12

What else can I do for my family? My mother, my brothers and sisters who have strayed from the DNA due to the age gap, clash of interests and ego on their part. It's hard for me to help sighs suffocating.

01:44:14--> 01:44:15

Yes, my

01:44:17--> 01:44:21

mother passed away five years ago and since then things have gone wrong.

01:44:24--> 01:44:25

First of all,

01:44:26--> 01:44:28

bless your father granted success

01:44:29--> 01:44:32

this year after by children

01:44:35--> 01:44:43

and so on and so forth. Your father's raised in the garden of paradise where he smells deceptive gentlemen.

01:44:46--> 01:44:59

With regards to the age of gas and the fact that family the strength in this is something that everybody faces. Everyone has this challenge. Everyone's going through it including myself.

01:45:00--> 01:45:08

We've all been through it. A lot of times people look at you know, speakers are coming talk and give lectures, Mashallah they come from good families, pious families, and

01:45:09--> 01:45:18

it's not the case, right? Everyone is struggling with this. So what you do is you ask for loss of wisdom, in your words of

01:45:19--> 01:45:28

wisdom, in my words of wisdom in my actions, is make it easy for people to understand the meaning of distracting somebody will see.

01:45:31--> 01:45:32

Only the

01:45:35--> 01:45:38

big things easy for music, people understand that understanding.

01:45:39--> 01:45:53

To unlock all of these change in our hearts, please make them better guess for others may drive for yourself to become a better person and someone was more understood. Because these are the people that you love, and you want them to be successful in this life.

01:45:55--> 01:46:01

Loss of palatable wisdom to you so that you can be helpful towards others.

01:46:03--> 01:46:07

Also make lots and lots and lots of

01:46:08--> 01:46:43

turn to a loss of confidence. In your actions, be a good example that you want others to be able to see that on you, while at the same time know that you can't change everything. You can't change everybody. In fact, the challenge that we all have is with our family members, that you will never be able to get all of your family members to be on one page just doesn't happen. Those are the tests that we go through in life. And a lot of tests us with the things that are dear to us, which is our family. So we asked Allah to enlighten

01:46:44--> 01:46:50

us our difficulties and to make things easier for us with regards to our how many

01:47:01--> 01:47:16

I do not want to be a doctor. But how do we get explaining? encourage my mother to pray five times a day by making prayer something that is constant in your house and not going into a room and frame

01:47:19--> 01:47:20

five times a day.

01:47:22--> 01:47:45

Get those other people that are there. For example, you might have brothers or sisters, get them together. Get your brother father to call the event in the house. Right? Sometimes people blame us and family members are not praying. Parents complain My children are great. We're doing great. Okay, great home. Where in your house? Do you pray? My dear children ever seen you

01:47:47--> 01:47:48

know why?

01:47:49--> 01:47:58

You're downstairs? What are they doing? Playing video games? Why are you playing in your room when your children are downstairs playing video games? I keep calling them to come and

01:47:59--> 01:48:00

go in the living

01:48:01--> 01:48:01

room.

01:48:29--> 01:48:32

If you like if you're annoyed, guess what? I'm getting afraid right here today.

01:48:36--> 01:48:37

Right here.

01:48:55--> 01:49:02

Off they will continue to do it. Continue to do it. You show them the example. And eventually

01:49:05--> 01:49:06

by explaining it to them.

01:49:08--> 01:49:09

They don't know why your brain

01:49:11--> 01:49:17

like you just said a few minutes ago. Why do we pray? Why do we do the things that we do? They will understand this. They will want

01:49:18--> 01:49:29

that for this evening. You guys need to turn the air conditioning down. Everyone's freezing. And it turned off a few months ago when I was here.

01:49:40--> 01:49:42

I have a sister went back at

01:49:43--> 01:49:46

Dublin parents in less than last year.

01:49:47--> 01:49:55

It's been a year now my mother has been reluctant to accept my brothers and sisters who plan on marriage this year.

01:49:58--> 01:49:59

As the youngest

01:50:00--> 01:50:00

families

01:50:02--> 01:50:05

with different approaches to data by parents who are not qualifying.

01:50:09--> 01:50:26

I think I've mentioned quite a few things and addressed his points already. And mentioned quite a few things that you can do that addresses points. When it comes to a family, and you know, some of your brothers or sisters might not be obedient, there's nothing you can do. That's, that's,

01:50:28--> 01:50:45

that's just a habit, it may be a test for you. So know that you need to safeguard yourself, because this might be a test that shape folks that you're trying to discourage you from what you're doing. So don't ever feel as though you're better than your family members, because you're the one

01:50:46--> 01:51:20

that is working really hard on you. So you need to always be proud about these many steadfast upon what I'm doing. Because real test comes when you're actually tested. A lot of us we say you pray five times a day, right? Right five times a day, we should all say that we pray five times a day. But the question comes down to when you're on a 12 when you're on a 16 hour flight from Singapore, to London, wherever it is, for 16 hours, you have to grab the plane.

01:51:22--> 01:51:29

That's the test that you claim that you can fake. But you never know that day that you might miss your prayers must be the last thing.

01:51:31--> 01:51:35

Right? never feel as though you're saying that. I'm the only one in my family.

01:51:36--> 01:51:46

You never know. Maybe the day that you stop praying is your last day that could be the first day that that person in your family begins to pray for the rest of their life. You never know us in

01:51:48--> 01:51:51

ways that we don't understand nor to be comprehensive.

01:52:09--> 01:52:10

This is

01:52:33--> 01:52:34

keeping these

01:52:35--> 01:52:40

seizures, repetitive. Some of them are very repetitive on trials and patients which

01:52:42--> 01:52:50

will stop natural law keep them with me have tried and tested tonight in tonight's lecture as well, which is incentive baguettes, your questions?

01:53:00--> 01:53:01

Thank you

01:53:06--> 01:53:07

for sharing.

01:53:31--> 01:53:38

We've not come to the end of the second. The organizers of this seminar like to express our heartfelt gratitude to all of you today.

01:53:40--> 01:53:40

Not forgetting us.

01:53:47--> 01:53:48

For us, our families and our

01:53:50--> 01:53:51

people taking time off