Islamic Manners – Episode 04

Ali Albarghouthi


Channel: Ali Albarghouthi


File Size: 35.60MB

Episode Notes

Share Page

Transcript ©

AI generated text may display inaccurate or offensive information that doesn’t represent Muslim Central's views. Thus,no part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.

00:00:04--> 00:00:07

smilla with him that he loves salatu salam ala rasulillah

00:00:08--> 00:00:32

salam Alhamdulillah hinomoto Minister you know when it's still futile when our that we let him in Trudy and fusina was he at the marina Mija de la philomel diletta. Who may you live? Villa de la wa shadow Allah. Allahu Allah. Surely Kayla worship Mohammed Abdul Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sahbihi wa sallam. First of all, inshallah, before we start

00:00:34--> 00:00:38

connected to the hot water that we talked about the topic that we addressed in the hotel,

00:00:39--> 00:01:13

the brother alerted me to this brought about a philosophy, like always, to thank the brothers who are behind this livestream. So if you're watching this at home, or if you happen to be watching this later on on YouTube, or social media in general, know that there are some people who are recording this, you only see me that of course, there are people who are streaming this and recording that. And these are others, you know, who are young, I mean, they're, they're in their teens, some of them are here, some of them are not. So whether it's a hotel,

00:01:14--> 00:01:31

or whether it's a lecture happening here in the masjid, the reason after Allah azza wa jal that you are seeing this is because of brothers who spend the time and they make sure that this is broadcast. So they are partners in the edge in the reward that we are receiving.

00:01:32--> 00:01:44

May Allah zoji less than for that and enable them to continue to do this later on. So that whatever whatever they are doing at this moment, whether they are here or not allows it and knows who they are.

00:01:45--> 00:02:28

What are they doing right now becomes a seed in sha Allah for righteousness tree that keeps growing and keeps giving to limits Allah azza wa jal, and they find its fruit with Allah zodion on the Day of Judgment, so whether we know them or not. And in fact, whether we thank them or not, the reason why we're thanking them is that there's benefit in it. They recognize that what they're doing is valuable. So there is recognition. So but they don't need and none of us needs anybody else's recognized recognition. The best recognition is the one that Allah azza wa jal has, but maybe perhaps through our recognition, they'll be motivated. And they may be they will feel that a lot of

00:02:28--> 00:02:35

the likes what they're doing, because it is beneficial. So ask Allah xojo to help them keep doing this.

00:02:36--> 00:03:15

There was a question here were usually a that's the first question I think that I've received in the series. And the sister is asking about accepting gifts from coworkers in this season in the holiday season. She says people have different opinions. Can you please clarify? So if you are receiving gifts from non Muslims, and their holiday season and their festivals, and as long as that gift is halal, meaning they're not gifting you something that is herranz? Not alcohol, right? So if they're gifting you something that in itself is halal. In their holiday season, you're allowed to accept it.

00:03:16--> 00:03:59

You're not allowed to gift them something. So what the prohibited bot is, you cannot give them something. So that is haram. Why is that haram because you'll be honoring their occasions, their holidays, their beliefs, by whatever they you give them. So you're not allowed to give them something. Now you can give them something later, when eight comes on Ramadan comes on when there is an Islamic occasion that you want to first commemorate second point their attention to and also reciprocate that gift. You can give them something during our age and our festivals. But if they do give you something, it's hidden, meaning what they are giving you the item is valid, and they give

00:03:59--> 00:04:08

it to you during their holiday seasons. It is as premise or as a default, you're allowed to accept it, right?

00:04:09--> 00:04:36

What do you choose to do with it later on, you can accept it and then you can give it to them. Other people, you can accept it and you can use it to yourself, that is up to you. But at least that is one way of softening their hearts. That is when you accept somebody gifts. And later on and we're going to be talking about gifts and shallot soon. And when you give somebody gifts that opens hearts, and when the hearts are open, it's easier than or easier for the truth to enter those hearts.

00:04:37--> 00:04:44

So to continue now in shall after this question and the recognition and the thanks we've given to those of helping broadcast this

00:04:45--> 00:04:59

in point number two in the book mean edible Islam so we're continuing with Islamic manners. And he moves on after talking about the parents. That's the last thing we talked about last week. He says that if you come out to receive somebody

00:05:00--> 00:05:38

A teacher, a parent, or a friend, he says for lack of a Nevada ultrafico office in a quantity Varma melodic meaning, notice your appearance. So you're going out to receive someone. So somebody is coming, let's say, for instance, you're receiving them in the airport, or somebody is coming and you're receiving them at home, whoever you're receiving, whether you're someone who is above you, meaning that he's higher, more respected, older than you, or somebody that is beneath you, meaning that he is what he or she is what they're younger than you, they're not in the same status, not at the same level as yours, not the same age. So he says, No, it is always what you're we're awaring

00:05:38--> 00:06:18

and make it beautiful, make it presentable, because that is part of the reception itself. So the reception is not only and simply I'm going out to receive someone, or I'm smiling when I'm receiving them, or I'm choosing also the best words to receive them with, but also how do you look? And how does your house look? Because that's part of what personally is still the best reception. So how you look how your hair looks, how your clothes, look, how your shoes look, everything right? The complete ensemble? How do you look? Right? We're not saying here that you need to go overboard with it and exaggerate with it, no, but that should be clean and presentable. And

00:06:20--> 00:07:02

here, if what he's talking about is this is true when you are receiving other people. And we're going to add to it of course this is even more important, when you are meeting Allah xojo in the Salah. And also when you are attending the houses of Allah xojo or you are being invited as a guest, right? So all of these are more important or equally important. So of course, we said when you're meeting or receiving other human beings, you have to pay attention to how you look. Right? That you clean, okay, you've cleaned yourself you've showered, you put on you know, if you're a male, if you're male, you put on some perfume, fix your hair, fix their clothes, so that when you meet

00:07:02--> 00:07:09

somebody else, they are pleased with what they see. So say the same thing is with Salah.

00:07:10--> 00:07:15

The same thing with Salah In fact, it's more important than Salah because in Salah Who are you meeting

00:07:16--> 00:08:02

Allah as origin, so Allah azza wa jal is above everybody else, so he deserves more of that. And in fact, there is reward for a todos ginetta calm as Allah says in the Colima state. And when you enter every Masjid or when you worship Allah, if every message it means the worship of Allah azza wa jal whenever you are worshiping Allah, adopt or take usina your beautification, and this is for what, because you are talking to Allah xojo. And so this when you do this, when you adorn yourself and you beautify yourself, except it's signals that you consider this meeting important, right? Are you sick, it means that this meeting is important, just exactly like there's a job interview. So how do

00:08:02--> 00:08:46

you dress up, you're always looking at the expectations. I want to get this job I want to impress so the way that you dress reflects how important this job is for you, and how important that opportunity is. So if this is an opportunity, where you're meeting a lot as origin, so you want to dress up the best that you can, especially on the best of the Salawat where the prophets illallah wa sallam used to dress up Juma and eight. But not only that, the five daily prayers, the five daily prayers, so so that even if you're at home, deserves also to be beautiful. And so that when you come to the masjid for men more than a woman deserves also to be beautiful for sisters. Just for you to

00:08:46--> 00:09:28

be clean. You cannot put perfumes on you can put makeup on and all of that for but for the brothers in addition to being clean, you put on some perfume you put on nice clothes and you come to the masjid This is how you honor that worship and you're meeting with Allah azza wa jal, so with Salah in the masjid. And then when you are receiving people and when you're being invited, then he says, you know, continuing the reception part it says and if you can be in Kanika is the How was she in Manila? dia, if you can have a gift, sort of like somebody who's coming from overseas, you haven't seen him for a while Are you seeing somebody that you haven't seen in a while is is if it is

00:09:28--> 00:09:59

possible for you to bring a gift to them. That is something that is good, because indeed, that adds to the beauty of that meeting. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to her Do they have boo, he sets a lot to send them in the Hadith, the authentic hadith, give gifts to each other. And so you will love each other. So as a panela, I mean, this is a formula from the Prophet sallallahu wasallam that works. You want to increase love between you and your brother between you

00:10:00--> 00:10:40

You and your sister, you notice that it could be stronger or there is some friction between you, how do you overcome it? One of the ways is for you to give gifts to each other, or you want to you want to say I, I like this brother, but I want to even like him even more. Or I want him to like me even more, I want the bond between us to be even stronger. Or there's somebody older than you, and you want to show that respect and love to them, or somebody who's younger, and you want to show that love and respect to them. You give them gifts, because that opens the hearts. And it doesn't have to be something you know, fancy and something that is expensive, could be something that is very

00:10:40--> 00:11:18

simple, but meaningful. If it is something meaningful, I mean, simple and meaningful to be able to continue to give that. And so that was one way one formula to increasing love between people and he said that we're already forming. Harley said if it was known from the practice of the setup, and the home can we use to hype una mahoma de at an egomaniac damona de that it was what part of their habit that if they were visiting someone or coming upon someone, they would carry a gift to give to them while Odin Minogue even if it's a sea walk, something as simple as a sea walk but something that you give to them.

00:11:19--> 00:11:28

It just softens the heart and creates greater love between people and something any kind of a sweetener that is forgotten these days.

00:11:30--> 00:12:12

He says he then has a debit card, the phone name nose goes on. And he says if you receive a gift guest so receive somebody let's say from the airport, he talked about how you receive them first. But now if you receive them and you take him to your home in Venezuela because the phone fadeth double the fit, acknowledge and know how to receive them. How to honor your guest. Whatever I need to hear that and to value your time he will shout Avi he says I don't mean by that that you exaggerate in what you feed and what you give as drink for sooner. today. It Dalio famously had a basis. The sooner is to be moderate in this, the sooner is to be moderate, without wastefulness. But

00:12:12--> 00:12:50

he says what I mean by it. And I've seen imaginista who were mappila, one Babita. What do it for hold kpfa basic meaning when he comes in, you honor Him, you honor him by the food that you give the drink that you give, where he sits, where he sleeps, if he's spending the night, you tell him where is the Qibla, you give him the basic amenities that he needs. So he had again, a nice fresh towels to give him those fresh towels. He's gonna need some privacy, you give him that privacy, meaning that you think you put yourself in his place and say to yourself, what is it that he is going to need? And furthermore, ask him, is there something that I forgot something that you need? Can I help

00:12:50--> 00:13:34

with this? Can I help it so that he feels welcome, as if he is in his own home? Because the guests, especially his traveler, is a stranger. And that stranger, whoever is a stranger? Just from the words itself feels a strange fee. It's difficult, cannot adjust easily. So the more that you spend time and effort trying to help them adjust and acclimate, the better host you are. So you want to make him feel at home. And why does he say, Rahim? Allah, let it be heard that unto Holly, I don't mean by that you exaggerate. There is you know, that tendencies that some people have some people don't have it. It's cultural. But some people have it that whenever they want to have a guest guest

00:13:34--> 00:14:20

the way they go to an extreme and trying to honor that guest to the extent that they start hurting their own selves and their own budgets and their own families because they want to honor or they don't want to be criticized, or you received them, but you didn't give enough. So they overspend on food, overspend on drinks, overspend on buying new stuff, just so that they would show off just that so they would honor that guest. But of course, if that is what you do, and you end up hurting yourself, what happens is that slowly but surely, you're going to start hating having guests in your home and heating the guests themselves. So rather than that being an occasion that you enjoy, that

00:14:20--> 00:14:37

you would have more guests that you could honor and keep their company and end and earn rewards through hosting them. You start hating and regretting having them because every time somebody comes, you are hurt financially,

00:14:38--> 00:15:00

you overspend and it hurts your budget. So he says that's not the sooner the sooner allotted. To be moderate. Not to do less and not to do more, but rather do what is within your means. With a little bit extra care and honor, but what's within your means. This is the food that we eat or a little bit

00:15:00--> 00:15:41

Better. This is what we drink or a little bit better, just for you to honor the guests not to do so much that for next days you have to fast because I overspent or we say we're never receiving guests anymore. It was such a hassle. I don't want to do this anymore. So that's not the end. That's an exaggeration that brings the opposite result. So he says, That's not the sunedison is, this is what we're eating. Come in. This is what we're hearing. This is our food. And that's how you receive a guest. But of course with verbal honor, and with physical honor, if this is how you receive a guest, you'll be able to keep receiving them, or more over and over and over. So it says seek moderation

00:15:41--> 00:16:16

because moderation is the best. And the Prophet he did not mention, there's a Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam the article lowfield life. He says a prophet Silas hilum had forbidden that one would overburden themselves for the sake of a guest. Let's say for instance, you know, in the olden times, you have one animal, and you get a guest comes to you, and you think that they expect me to go and slaughter the only animal you have and feed them and you remain poor. It says no, this is technology, this is harmful. You're not supposed to this, you're saving money right? For the rest of the month, you take all of that and spend it on one guest one day that will harm you and harm your

00:16:16--> 00:16:21

family you're not supposed to do this, but within mean within reasons and within your means.

00:16:23--> 00:16:25

He says and if you offer a

00:16:26--> 00:17:09

like a towel for him to clean himself from ODU or whatever right make sure that whatever you offer to him is clean and better be towels for the guests not something that you have used an overuse that it looks old when he uses it disgusted by it something that is reserved for the guests something that if you want to go to somebody's home you would not mind using yourself but not nothing that that will be repulsive. And he says also it's not a bad idea he's saying until he hit the belly of the year I mean, if you have perfume, you give him some of that perfume so that he would feel better when he puts it on. While we are earlier the gentleman who feared the Italian Mafia meaning that he

00:17:09--> 00:17:51

would have a mirror so that he can fix himself and appearance or herself and appearance before she goes in before before she goes out. And you let him know if he wants to purify himself clean himself This is the bathroom This is what you can use this is what you cannot use. And he says well hablando de La MaMa v Murphy Malaysian on tala he I know biofuels Hurry, before he goes into your bathroom. Put aside things that you don't want him to see. You don't want her to see. Same things that if he were to see it if she were to see it would embarrass you all would embarrassing. So again, take a look and say, is this appropriate? Can he go here? Or can he not? Would he be embarrassed? Would I

00:17:51--> 00:17:58

be embarrassed? So all of all of these things away so that his presence there is comfortable? And you're not

00:17:59--> 00:18:01

you know, discomforted by it

00:18:02--> 00:18:11

and he says if he's staying there at your home overnight or is taking a nap make sure that it's quiet make sure that it's not noisy.

00:18:12--> 00:18:17

Anything that is yellow should hire I mean anything that is uncomfortable for him to see.

00:18:19--> 00:18:25

Put it aside right so anything that is private specially related to the ladies you keep it aside so that

00:18:28--> 00:18:30

now um so that it's not uncomfortable

00:18:32--> 00:18:41

and he says that you know there's a hadith or not a hadith but here a statement from Alia Rahim Allah can a set of UI that is our author john lewis is the seller

00:18:42--> 00:19:28

the older is that that first Muslims so he's describing the Sunnah of the Sahaba and the Tabby he he says when they used to visit each other, they would beautify themselves they would adorn themselves meaning and you dress up and look nice when they visit each other you know what what's what did I will Alia why did why do I say this somebody came and visited Abdullah Alia and he was wearing wool safe okay. So and so, you know is that this cheapest clothes that you can have. So, earlier haimo like he said, in a mahadasha, theorbo Rabanne, he says, These are the clothes of monks. And these are not our clothes, the clothes of Muslims. The Prophet sallallahu wasallam was not his habit, if

00:19:28--> 00:19:34

you remember the Heidi, the prophets Allah already sent them was not his habit to wear wool intentionally

00:19:35--> 00:19:59

was not okay, was not to seek it, even though he could afford something better just to seek that and was not the son of the Sahaba is not the son of the Tiger in so when he saw somebody and that was a tendency that developed or seem to be developing early for people to think that if they want to be pious, they have to wear souf wool, like the most and the cheapest and miserable of clothes.

00:20:00--> 00:20:14

So he said in the Mojave Thea bro ban these are the clothes of monks. Can a cellar fool he says the early Muslims when they would visit each other meaning he's telling him you they wouldn't dress like what you're dressing, but they would

00:20:15--> 00:20:27

dress up. So that is he is pointing to a habit that is a tsunami of early Muslims. So a person pays attention insha Allah to that, especially when they're visiting each other.

00:20:30--> 00:21:12

And he says here, why he then has to defend Allah. So the Aquino party and he says if you are a guest yourself, you are a guest for Khun Latif Avila Aviva Zama do it at a meeting don't spend too much time being a guest visiting someone. What are the loofa archaeometry who oh geez must have taught them and walk through the fit calendar. He says. So when you're visiting someone, pay attention that that person may have other things to do, he may be busy. So don't spend too much time. Unless you know what that he or she would love for you to stay. Or you have reached a level of friendship where it's easy for you too easy for him to say you know what, I'm busy. Okay, you've

00:21:12--> 00:21:49

reached that level where he can tell you without any reservation without making you angry, angry or risking making you angry, you know what I'm busy completer if that's the case, you can stay because you know, then that you're not embarrassing him. But if you're visiting someone and you suspect that he may be embarrassed by how long you stay, don't stay too long. But be quick visit. And once you visit, you leave right so that you don't burden that person because you don't know what other responsibilities they have or what other responses or other needs, other family members has. His wife is waiting because her husband is waiting, the children are waiting. Other things need to be

00:21:49--> 00:21:52

done. You're not the only person who

00:21:54--> 00:21:56

you're free but they are not free.

00:21:58--> 00:22:41

And he says we're in double duty coffee Beatty if you are present in his home or for the sisters in her home, love to click bussola coffee for Hassan Wanaka we talked about this he says Don't let your eyes loose. Expect inspecting everything around the lights, the rug the sofa, what he's wearing what she's saying to her kids what her saying kids are saying to her and rest registering in your head all the mistakes that they are doing all the bad things that they have done, how expensive the things that they have is or how cheap what they own is and then you remember all of that and when you leave you start sharing that with your husband with your wife with your friends that's not

00:22:41--> 00:23:11

America so we said the manner is to keep the secrets of the home they interested you as you came in that you're going to be a guest who was honorable inside and honorable outside not what do you find something a mistake on the inside you're going to broadcast it on the outside otherwise we said the host would never allow you in would never right so you're only we're allowed into anybody's house because they have a level of trust. So you gotta maintain that trust so law don't go inspecting the house looking for mistakes.

00:23:13--> 00:23:31

Well how sorry the autodoc Municipal for the ACA illegal office so if there's he invites you to the guest home or the guest room and he you need to leave it somewhere else on your path somewhere else to the bathroom or whatever it says lower your gaze. Lower your gaze and don't look left and right don't inspect this and that.

00:23:32--> 00:24:12

focaccia kunafa Himalayas una Antara hola como de and vs Isla de because if you keep looking left and right, you may Galactica glance or get a glance of something that you're not supposed to see something that he would hate for you to see, or something you would hate to see. So you don't want to see these things. And he says Also, don't be too inquisitive with your questions. Don't ask too many questions. Where did you buy this from? Unless again, unless you know you have such a good relationship that he doesn't mind? She doesn't mind. But some of us ask way too many questions. Where did you buy this from? How much did it cost? And the reason maybe I just want to know how rich

00:24:12--> 00:24:43

you are? Or how much will you have willing to spend on such a thing? Where did you travel? How much did it cost you? If you feel that okay, you're asking unnecessary questions that are bringing you no real results. And the host may resent that may not be comfortable with it. Don't ask these questions. So limited to what so how do I know where to stop? Ask yourself Do I need to know these things? And do I know him or her well enough that they are comfortable with that?

00:24:44--> 00:24:49

And can they ask me for instance, if they are uncomfortable and say well this is private will they be

00:24:50--> 00:25:00

and Would it be okay for them to say this or will they be embarrassed? But all the things that I'm asking so limit unless you know that they don't mind it limits your

00:25:00--> 00:25:02

Question. And as the prophets of Allah Allah wa sallam said,

00:25:03--> 00:25:09

in his nice loving moderator kumala any of your Islam of the world practice

00:25:10--> 00:25:28

of Islam and having a strong Islam is for you to leave what is not a concern of yours. So if something is not beneficial does not concern you. Don't ask about it. Don't look at it. Don't inspect it, don't go after it. You keep your heart clean and your mind clean. And you can focus on what Allah zildjian loves.

00:25:30--> 00:25:47

That point number 23. Now he moves on from the guests to talking about the sick. He says unhappy African Muslim, either mareeba and todo. He says have the rights that belong to your brother or your sister, is that when they are sick, you visit them.

00:25:48--> 00:25:52

You had to marry and hear the prophets a lot he said them says

00:25:53--> 00:26:40

in a Muslim either either. Muslim Lamia Sophia horfield genetti hotair j clelia rasulillah. He will not refer to Jenna kala, Jenna, he says the person when he visits another Muslim, he will continue to harvest from the Jenna as long as he's there until he gets back. So they ask him what it what is horrified, horrified to engender, he says the harvest of the agenda. So it means that like literally, when the person who goes and visits another sick person, the length of time they stay there until they come back as as if they went to Jenna and they're collecting formats fruit fruits throughout that time until they come back. No so that there is rewarding that obviously, but they

00:26:40--> 00:26:59

will see that that they've collected when they enter agenda and meet Allah zildjian how rich they have become when they meet Allah as the origin. So the more that they visit, the more that they will have this as if Subhana love visiting the sick person is visiting gender itself and coming back.

00:27:00--> 00:27:39

So we said that this is from Hakuna Muslim when the Prophet sallallahu wasallam said the rise of the Muslim upon a Muslim is five one of them he named he added two Marines visiting the sick person. So I'm going to ask you, why is it that Allah azzawajal made it right and had given such great reward for it. That is there is also an another Hadith that says that if approved, you visit a sick person in the evening. A lot as though gel will ask 70,000 angels to make do out for you till the morning till fetchit. And he visited him during the day allow as 70,000 angels to make do out for you until Margaret.

00:27:41--> 00:27:45

So if you visit at night, the whole night, if you visited in the morning the whole morning.

00:27:46--> 00:27:49

So why did Allah azza wa jal make it

00:27:52--> 00:27:59

so important? And so rewardable visiting the sick,

00:28:00--> 00:28:03

why isn't who benefits when you visit the sick person?

00:28:07--> 00:28:25

Both both. So the person visiting benefits and the sick person benefits and the family benefits. So everybody benefits. And maybe because as a healthy person, this is not the first thing that you think about to go and visit the sick. Why?

00:28:27--> 00:28:46

Because I don't want to be sick or I have something else to do. But because Allah zildjian knows how important it is for everybody. And we'll explain why it's important for everybody. But because Allah knows how important it is for everybody and to emphasize the rights of the sick, who need you. He says you're going to get so much when you visit them, just like praying janaza

00:28:48--> 00:29:16

for a lot of us who could say I have something else to do. Why should I stand in Salah even if it's a couple of minutes we said Why should I stand in Salah, pray janazah for somebody else, I'm making draft for somebody else. What benefit does it bring to me or go to the cemetery? Why should I go I have something better to do. So Allah azza wa jal attaches great reward for that, because you need it but you don't like realize that you need it. And the dead needs it. The dead needs your

00:29:17--> 00:29:46

right needs your intercession needs if you're going to the janaza weather What does he need? he's aware of you. So you keep him company until Allah as though just sends those little angels and they asked him see keep him company so he needs you during this difficult time. He needs you for your and for your company. So that's what a lot of that says. You will have to figure out if you pray and you go to the cemetery to clear out each clear route is likelihood.

00:29:47--> 00:29:48


00:29:49--> 00:29:51

so, for the sick,

00:29:52--> 00:29:58

who benefits first, the second person and we'll talk about a little bit about the manners the sick person

00:30:00--> 00:30:45

Why does the sick person say benefit, because in that state, you're weak by visiting a person at home or in the hospital, you're weak. So you don't know person's Eman could be challenged at that moment. And they could feel alone. They need that reminder. They need that company, they need somebody to come and tell them. This is from Allah zoji to come and make up for them to come and make them feel better. So when you're sick, and remember the last time that you were sick, just having somebody beside you made it better. So if you're alone, or nobody comes and visits, it's difficult, sometimes Subhanallah because of that sickness, you think that that's it? The doors of

00:30:45--> 00:31:30

mercy have closed, there are no such there's no solution at all. It's just gonna keep getting worse and worse and worse, until somebody comes and said a very beautiful statement to you, and just changes your whole thinking and disposition. And you have hope again, after you thought I've lost hope. So for the sick, is desperately needed. The family may need you as well. Okay, the family may need some assistance, but there's no one to ask. Then you come and they're able to ask you, or they need some encouragement or direction. Right? They have no, they have no resources, but you come and you offer those resources, so the family may need you. Now why if you are visiting that sick person,

00:31:30--> 00:31:36

why do you need it? If you are the visitor not the sick? But you're the visitor? Why do you need it?

00:31:38--> 00:31:42

Why do you think we talked about the reward from Allah azza wa jal? So that's true.

00:31:55--> 00:32:37

Right? That's what you said. Right? Yeah. zachman law here. So there's a heady theory that he mentioned, where the Prophet sallallahu Sallam he says rudall model da was World War Two, the Kuru, Camila theorises, visit the sick and visit the cemetery it reminds you of the hereafter. So that really is the is is the essence, let's say, of why it is important for me as a person in addition to other things where I'm making and contributing. The benefit that it brings me is that it reminds me of the hereafter it's strips down this life to its reality if you visit the cemetery, you know that this is where I'm going to end it reminds you

00:32:38--> 00:32:44

but sometimes if you keep visiting the cemetery that may not affect you as much become sort of you know, customary

00:32:46--> 00:33:13

is the same images. But if you go and talk to a sick person who you know before was healthy, and you find him to be weak and you discover his weakness and physically weak and this and that happening to them, sometimes out of nowhere, you realize that this could happen to you as well. And again, you realize the reality of this life that it does not last and your health is something borrowed. Health is something only borrowed

00:33:18--> 00:33:54

Okay, okay. Sooner or later, that health is going to leave. So when you see that sick person you remember the hereafter yours remember your own hereafter your own death, your own weakness, and maybe that prompts you to come back to Allah azza wa jal thank you for the help that you have. But also come back to Allah azza wa jal because you say, I want to do something before this happens to me. If you did not go to Hajj to say, I'm going to go to Hajj before that happens not on but I'm going to go to Amara, if you haven't picked up the horn and violet says okay, this person is not able to carry the Quran or read it with me at least do it before I'm denied that opportunity.

00:33:54--> 00:33:56

Subhana Allah there are people who would say,

00:33:57--> 00:34:39

more than one person, he say, Make dua for me, because sujood is the thing that I love the most, I've heard it for more than more than one person, I can make salute. Now, I can go to the ground, this hurts and that hurts. And he sees a panel that I can mix it with anytime I want. Anytime, there may they're asking you to make sure that they go to sujood. And you know that you can make sujood at this second, but we're not doing it. And we're not appreciating it. When you hear that from someone. It reminds you that you really have a great NEMA, that your joints can still bend is an AMA from Allah as origin. But somebody loss reminds you of the nightmare that you have. That's why you need

00:34:39--> 00:34:59

to visit the sick and that's why a lot attach such great reward to it that yes, go go and do it. Because they get a lot more than these rewards that allowed mentioned you're going to get your heart back. So this is part of the add up as well. The add up is not only how you behave when you visit the sick but in fact visiting the sick

00:35:00--> 00:35:01

learning from it.

00:35:02--> 00:35:03

So he says here,

00:35:06--> 00:35:12

he says, Remember that when you visiting the sick person that there are manners to this visit visitation.

00:35:14--> 00:35:17

He says don't spend too much time with him.

00:35:18--> 00:35:20

And again, just like the guest,

00:35:21--> 00:35:27

unless you know that he wants you to stay with them, okay for a long time, if that's the case stay,

00:35:28--> 00:36:12

because your stay helps. But if the if he is a sick person, right, then the assumption is, he doesn't want you to sit for long. Okay, the exception is stay longer. But other than that you visit, you ask you stay for a little bit, and then you leave unless he says no stay, I would like you to stay. Okay, the more we talk, the more we Converse, I feel better than stay if you can, and as long as you can, but otherwise, don't spend too much time. And he says value added to Maria de kegel set will hardly be he says, visiting the sake how long you stay is this like how long the Hadoop stays between the two helpers in Joomla. You know how short it is? It says finish the hook by use it just

00:36:12--> 00:36:28

for you know the time for you just to say stuff roll a few times. And then you stand up again. It says that's how it is very short. You just passed by you sit a little bit, you make sure that he's fine. And then you leave. If he asks you to stay then you stay.

00:36:30--> 00:37:14

And he says he there's a two verses of poetry. So suppose he had a T yo moon by Naomi walk out Colleen and chemistry, lovely belying he says, the best of the best of visitation that you can do is a day between two days meaning not every day, okay, like skip a day, not every day so that you burden them well. kalila and sit a little bit like the blink of an eye. So be light. Be considerate and be light led to breman knowledge and famous Musa Allah tinea Creek, I mean, the cactus Allahu Bihar may be horrifying. It says don't burden a sick person by asking a lot of questions. It's enough to you to ask him with two words. How are you doing? Right kafer and de facto law meaning

00:37:14--> 00:37:23

that how are you doing shafaq Allah? So few questions, right without too many questions without too many investigative

00:37:25--> 00:37:31

conversations what is happening with you? Why this why this why that he may not be comfortable with all of that.

00:37:32--> 00:37:35

He says he quotes ignore Abdul Rahim Allah.

00:37:36--> 00:37:52

He says if you visit, whether a sick person or a healthy person sit wherever they asked you to sit, because they know their house well, and he says visiting the sick is a pseudonym, aka a second firmed sooner, we'll have a better idea for

00:37:54--> 00:38:15

sure it's short and it should be shortest, the best a bad yeah, that visitation is the shortest one. And do not spend too much time with a sick person, unless he is a friend and he would like you to stay. And he says when you enter right when you enter and visit him, take care of your clothes as well. Right so that your appearance pleases Him.

00:38:17--> 00:39:03

And He says when you're there when you visit him select what you say carefully, because that sick person is watching whatever you're saying. Okay? his mentality, his he's very emotional. So he's watching every word that you're saying. So you try to comfort so he's saying on the one hand, he says well I embedded in the esta hubiera and meridian meridian Bara moussaka sin it says make sure that you don't investigate too much about his illness. And he says if he tells you don't if you don't know offer your own solutions and contradict the doctor. So he's you know, following a specific medication and that medication is what he's supposed to follow. Don't go and interject and

00:39:03--> 00:39:15

say no, it doesn't work or the doctors are stupid they don't understand this and that unless you know what you're saying. don't discourage him from continuing to take his medication don't offer your own thoughts about this because that could be harmful.

00:39:17--> 00:39:23

And also important that when you visit that you offer and I think of I don't know if I've skipped it

00:39:28--> 00:39:29


00:39:30--> 00:40:00

Must have been here somewhere. So when you enter or when you meet him make dua for him. So he say for instance, lebuh SATA, hold on inshallah. It says, labas. There is no harm upon you. The whole purification for you in sha Allah remind him of why this is happening. And there is wisdom behind it. And every you know, every night has an end. And if he asked Allah as origin, Allah will grant him she forbidden the law if it is written if it is best for him, and there is no

00:40:00--> 00:40:44

No disease except that Allah had written a cure for it, whether we know it or not, and to keep asking Allah as it will for that cure, and to use the Quran as a cure, and to be patient, all of these comforting thoughts, and all of these comforting words, okay, to just make him feel better, and to give him a fuel to be able to continue and to for him to reconnect with Allah as origin and know that he had been selected, not cursed because of what is happening to him. Now that Allah is angry with him, but rather increases hope, elevate is hoping Allah Zoda that Allah when he wants to test, he tests the people that he loves. And when a lot as a test a person he wants to see patients

00:40:44--> 00:41:13

from him. And if you are simply patient, alone will take away your sins every single day and every single hour. And on top of that, if you're happy and pleased with whatever Allah as of Jun had sent you, Allah will elevate your rank. So this, in fact, could be a blessing for you. So remember, why Allah is sending you these things. And you can ask him also at that moment, just to also to elevate his spirit is at this moment, you actually could be very close to Allah zoji.

00:41:15--> 00:41:44

So you make do out for us, you make do out for us. Because then he will feel that Allah as the gene has selected him for something that is good. And if he continues to be patient, Allah is digital only right for him what is good despite the physical pain, and if you have stories of people at the time of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam who did suffer, but we're blessed because of it, include those stories, because this will only work to motivate him and enliven his spirit.

00:41:57--> 00:42:09

Now he moves on in he says, make sure all of this important number 26. That may be probably the last one. And he says if you have to tell about a bad news, if you want to convey bad news to someone,

00:42:12--> 00:42:17

someone who's close to you or to a friend, try to soften it, try to soften it

00:42:18--> 00:42:46

in a way that when they receive that bad news is not going to terrorize them is not going to harm them is not going to incur damage. But use the best time to tell them the best way to tell them the best space to tell them and introduce it in a pleasant or the most pleasant way possible. So he says For instance, if somebody died, this is maybe common in some cultures, somebody will come and say, Do you know who died today?

00:42:47--> 00:42:49

He says it's not a quiz.

00:42:50--> 00:43:31

Do you know who died today because when you decide sates that to someone, they'll think the worst. in their mind, they'll inspect the worst. Do you know what happened to so and so today? If it is someone that was dear to them, they'll expect the worst is don't do that. But rather introduce it by saying so and so this happened to them. And so and so this and that happened to them so that they don't panic thinking about the worst in their head. Because typically, we gravitate towards the reverse that we assume the worst when that is happening. And he says, if something bad happens, the way that you say it also matters, the way that you say it also matters. Don't let a bit of be so

00:43:31--> 00:43:31


00:43:32--> 00:44:12

so terrifying, that it's gonna damage that person when he hears it. And there is that selection of that best way and the best place. There's that famous hadith of what's happened during the time where the prophets of lollywood send them when their family lost a young son, and the husband did not know about it. And the wife is the one who knew about it, and she buried her son. But when the husband came back, and he asked Where is my son, she didn't tell him that he died. Right. She didn't tell him that he died. She's telling that he's quiet. He's very quiet because he was sick before. He says he was very quiet right now she meant dead.

00:44:13--> 00:44:22

But she didn't tell him until what he came and he rested and he ate and they did and that and that. And then when he did everything right and was very comfortable. Then she told him.

00:44:23--> 00:44:47

So for panela I mean to expect and to witness a woman doing this, which which you would assume she would be the one who is collapsing. Because of that news. She said that she will have the patience and the bravery. In fact to be able to do this tells you a lot about her. But here is an example of someone who had received one of the worst news that you could receive and he was patient enough

00:44:48--> 00:44:59

in taking it in but also patient enough and wise enough in delivering this measure to someone so something bad happens. Make sure that that person is in the best of state best of places and select your worst case.

00:45:00--> 00:45:22

Carefully. And it's not a bad idea for you to consult other people, how can I tell them this or to ask Allah, Allah guide me to the best way that I can spread this to them, tell them that so it does not hurt them. So again, be very careful, be very be very tactful in how you tell people, the bad news if there is bad news, the best place and the best words.

00:45:23--> 00:45:55

And he says he maybe will do port number 27 and stop there. And he says if somebody loses someone dear to them, a family member or somebody that you love, remember to console them as soon as possible Desi, to talk to them and to console them as soon as possible, and show them that you care. Because again, just like a sick person needs you. The person who has a lot sounds lost someone also needs you needs to see you close to them needs to hear from you needs that reminder.

00:45:57--> 00:46:39

And sometimes the assistance that you give is something that you don't notice, but that person knows it. You know, I forgot the exact sentence itself. But even though I bested him a lot, and I'm really alone, and when I forgot that he loses father or lead to lose a son or someone and some people were coming and consoling him, consoling him, consoling him, and then an IRA became, and he gave him a statement. I forgot what that statement was. And he said, Nobody affected me today like he did. Nobody helped me today like he did. And he wasn't someone who's close to him. But he just mentioned something meaningful. So sometimes sometimes it doesn't. It's not about how many people may you may

00:46:39--> 00:47:15

say, a lot of people came to console him. He knows a lot of people, but it's not about how many people it's about what you say. It's about what Allah enables you at that particular moment, to say something meaningful, that to that person, changes their perspective, allows them to escape their sadness, allows them to see the wisdom in what is happening to them, you are the one who's going to say it in addition to the fact that you yourself are going to benefit from that remembrance, say they lost somebody. And yeah, it could be the case that I could lose somebody as well.

00:47:16--> 00:47:46

Right? And he says, if you can go with them to the cemetery, also Allah xojo puts a lot of reward in it. Because as he says, a person could advise you and advise you as long as they are alive, but the best advice that they can give to you is when they die, as he says what kind of he hierarchically ivatan frantoio, moto minca haze, as you used to remind me when you are alive, but now when you're dead, your reminders are stronger than when you are life. Now when I see you motionless, you can move

00:47:47--> 00:47:50

your state is far more

00:47:52--> 00:48:24

it's a lot wiser, and far more meaningful than your words. So this is this is sometimes what we see. The heart becomes solid and dead times. When you don't see the sick around you don't you don't see the dead around you but when you see them again it jolts you back into remembering the reality of this life. So this is why the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that what we've mentioned how could Muslim and non Muslim is or the rights of the Muslim upon Muslim are five reduce salami. It says you

00:48:26--> 00:49:03

reply with this Anam Ada to Maria, the visiting the SEC. It's about Arjuna is following the funerals. The shmita will Altis saying your hammock Allah to the person who says that hamdulillah after the sneeze, what you Jabba to Tao and answering their invitations, specifically, the invitation for a wedding. So it says this is a hop right upon the Muslim towards other Muslims. And the Hadith that we've mentioned, we make this the last thing in sha Allah, Odin Mandala, whatever it is, he says, visit the sick and follow the funerals. It reminds you of the hereafter. So if you find yourself unaware, distant,

00:49:04--> 00:49:17

not close to Allah azzawajal, your heart is not responding to you. One of the things to bring your heart back to you is to do these things. So whenever there's a janazah, there are a lot of geneticists that you witness.

00:49:18--> 00:49:59

Don't simply just pray janazah, take one of those times, and follow the janazah and just see, see the dead being lowered into the grave. See the family around them, console them. And again, feel that this one day, this is going to be a spot exactly like this, that they're going to do for me and they're going to lower me there and look at it and imagine yourself there. Because when you imagine yourself there, which is really your reality, when you imagine yourself there, maybe that will move your heart to act differently and feel differently. And the same thing with the sick. The same thing exactly for the sick. If you don't want any sick people around you and you feel that

00:50:00--> 00:50:38

Allah had to give it you feel that though you have a lot of nightmares, but Allah did not give you a lot of nightmares. It's not really a bad idea for you to go and park in a hospital and go inside and just go into the waiting room and see the sick people and say, this person suffering from this and this person suffering from that just for you to see, in fact that no, not everybody is healthy, not everybody is in the mall, not everybody is buying this and that there are a lot of people who are suffering and you are very fortunate not to be suffering at this particular moment. So it ready to bring you back to recognizing the virtue, the aroma of Allah as the origin and his blessings upon

00:50:38--> 00:51:14

you. And that the reality of all of us, the end of all of us is this, this is what you see, not the health but death. So we'll finish and here in sha Allah and we will continue to be a vanilla as well this next week, or if we don't do this particular thing next week, because we're going to be I'm going to be here in Charlotte on the 27th. But if we don't we'll do this particular thing next week. We'll do another topic inshallah, and return to it the week after but Java will be here inshallah next week. Now I'm here also on the 25th as well. So 25th after Asia and the 27th after ACL surgery.

00:51:15--> 00:51:18

Do you have any questions for us?

00:51:23--> 00:51:26

Well, SOF, w o L.