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SelfEsteem

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Abdul Rahman Chao

Channel: Abdul Rahman Chao

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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So don't want to come up with

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a long like

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a long one?

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Squat

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Hi me

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hi me I'm fed

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along one

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hello

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in Alhamdulillah

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middle when I started you know when I stopped fiddle? What are the bIllahi min Shuri unforseen our min sejati are Marlena Mejia de la who Philomel de la Holman, uterine Fela Hajela wash Edwin La ilaha illallah hula hula Cherie color wash. Hello anna Muhammad Abdul Hora su yeah you Halina Amira Takala ha ha koutou katoa Walter moto Nila Juan to Muslim Yohanan SUTA Kurata Kamala the Halacha coming up soon we're headed to hell up I mean, huzzah. Jaha well that's I mean who Mary Jalan cathedral Morning Sir, what duckula Khalifa Luna be here well arhaan In Allah haka, and Ali kumara Theva Yeah, you Halina Amman otaku hola hola poodle colon city then you select la kumana Hola como

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Villa calm de Nova calm

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when I moved to LA Hora Sula, who forgot Faza frozen Alima another ad for in nautical Hadith Nicola Mala or Heyerdahl had you had you? Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa Salam

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wa CharBroil Ohmori more data to work with data in big data.

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All praise is due to Allah subhanahu wa taala. We praise Him we seek his assistance and we seek his forgiveness and we seek refuge in Allah subhanahu wa taala from the evil that is within ourselves, and from the evil that results from our actions. Whomsoever Allah subhanaw taala guides none show, misguide. And whomsoever Allah subhanaw taala allows to be led astray, none should guide them back to the straight path. I bear witness that there is no God worthy of worship except Allah subhanahu wata Allah. And I bear witness that Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa early he was Salam is his final messenger and Prophet Allah tells us in the Quran, oh you believe be God conscious violist

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found data deserves to be feared and do not die.

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except as Muslims Oh mankind if your Lord and be God conscious was created you from one soul and from it it's made and from many men and many women and fearless panna hula to Allah by the rights that you ask of one another and by the ties of kinship, rarely was found to Allah has ever watched for over you, Oh you who believe be God conscious feel as found out and speak the truth Your end your deeds righteous and he will forgive your sins and whoever Allah subhanahu wa whoever obeys Allah and His Messenger has indeed achieved a great victory. Barely the best wishes the speech of Allah and the best guidance is the guidance of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and the worst

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affairs is that of the religious innovation for for all of that is misguidance and misguidance leads to hell.

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After the pagan Meccans were thoroughly defeated in

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the Battle, the first battle of Islam better, they were eager to get revenge, they were eager to settle the score. And then within just a year or so,

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instead of meeting outside of Medina,

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the pagan Meccans marched on to Medina itself a full frontal assault on to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam.

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And when the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and camped his soldiers, he had battle he had the mountain of a hood behind him behind him.

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And he noticed that there was a group of cavalry soldiers led behind even Waleed who wasn't Muslim at that time, off to the west.

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And right there was also a small hill to the west. So he ordered that 50 Archers be stationed on that mountain on that little hill.

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And he said to them with,

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with clear instructions, do not come down from this mountain, because if you do,

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something bad's going to happen. In fact, even if you see us being killed and the birds are coming and eating from us, do not come down this mountain under no circumstances. So he placed his platoon of 50 Archers onto this mountain, so as to prevent Khalid bin Walid from outflanking the Muslims.

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As the battle progressed, the Muslims were on the cusp of victory.

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And right when it was thought that it was done and dusted

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the people the overwhelming majority of the archers on the mountain became overly eager to join the other Muslims to gather the war spoils.

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So some of them started descending from the mountain, and a few of them would say,

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the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam ordered us not to come down this route, he gave us clear instructions.

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And the reasoning given was, the battle is over. We don't need to be on this mountain anymore. So the majority of them descended from this mountain. And they started gathering the worst spoils. And at that moment, Khalid bin Walid, he noticed this golden opportunity. And so he charged from around this unguarded side of the Muslim army exposed flank. He brought his cavalry around, and he thoroughly routed the Muslims. So much so that so many of the great Sahaba were killed in this battle. So much so that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam himself had broken one of his lateral incisors. The Prophet sallallahu sallam was hit in the face dashed in the face of Allahu

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Allahu Salah people were coming up and trying to shoot arrows at the bottom sirloin.

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And after all this was done, the Muslims ended up losing in this battle,

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because of the direct disobedience, that they had gone against what the Protestant Salem had ordered them, and because they had rushed to judgment, and because they didn't remember, or they didn't realize what would happen if they came down this mountain, it resulted in a humiliating loss for the Muslims.

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Many of them their collective self esteem was shattered.

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Allah subhanahu wa taala sent down a verse to boost their self esteem, to give them hope to reassure them to remind them of who they were. Allah says, While tahina wallet doesn't know what to mull alone in control mode, meaning do not weaken, do not falter. Do not disgrace yourself

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elves

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do not weaken.

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While and do not be sad, do not despair, what unto Me alone, and you are indeed superior. If you are truly believers

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on this planet of what Allah sent down this verse, to teach the believers,

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that your identity, your view of yourself, shall never be eclipsed by one thing only.

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That one mistake that you make doesn't define you for the rest of your life. And while they had indeed, made this fatal mistake of not listening to the professor Salam, and they now reap the consequences,

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Yet Allah subhanaw taala is trying to remind them, you are indeed superior if you are believers, brothers and sisters, we are living in a time where we see a wide spectrum

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of views regarding how you view yourself self esteem, self value.

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And you will see on some extent, to some extent, on one side, you will see people taking surface measures

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to the point that it almost is unnaturally boosting your ego, in the name of you are the best and you are amazing, and you are always loved and cetera. And this is good for some people. But sometimes a little bit too much of that makes a person a little bit deluded about themselves. And then on the other hand, you have the other extreme or do too

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certain failed parenting techniques, where we use shaming and humiliation all the time as a technique to keep people in line. Right.

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Something you know growing up sometimes you know, people will say these kinds of things, you're worthless and you are this and that in How dare you and completely annihilate your self esteem.

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And brothers and sisters, if we want to understand the meaning of self esteem, talk to you a nurse or payment nurse and the value of yourself. You have to look back to the Quran and it is filled with examples of how Allah subhanho wa Taala has honored you as humans and as believers.

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First and foremost, Allah subhanho wa Taala

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had the angels Prostrate to Adam. In fact before that, Allah subhanho wa Taala created Adam with his two ends.

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I was found to Allah did not create any other creation directly like the way he created humans. Allah subhanahu wa taala breathed the soul into Adam. Allah subhanho wa Taala told the angels to prostrate to Adam, Allah subhanho wa Taala created you in the best proportion.

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Look at Harlequin Al Insana fee is Anita queen, Allah has created you in the best form in the best proportion.

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I was trying to Holika Allah has made this earth and its animals subservient to you.

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You want to clear this forest, you have the ability to clear this forest.

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And if you look at science and how humans interact with animals, zoologist will tell you that animals have an innate fear of humans.

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And this fear is rooted in the fact that we stand upright

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and that

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when they do things to us bad things happen to them right when a lion attacks, some you know livestock, something bad happens animals no almost penalty Allah put this fear in the animals

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to show respect to humans.

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Allah Subhana Allah Allah has given you the ability to completely change the landscape of the earth to manipulate materials, all for what for your benefit was

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Jeremy unmin Allah subhanaw taala has made subservient to you what is in the heavens and in the earth? All of it.

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Cada Iike Sahana lagoon La La comtesse Quran, Allah has made animals subservient to you

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so that you will be grateful. Allah subhanaw taala has given you free will. But more importantly, as we sit here

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the greatest honor Allah has given you is the fact that Allah has given you the deen of Islam

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Out of the billions of people out there, Allah gave you the guidance of Islam. How much more honored Can you want after the guidance of Islam?

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And so therefore, brothers and sisters,

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it behooves us to know that in times of difficulty like we are seeing in our atmosphere whether it is because of the Coronavirus or the political instability or the stock market, we have to have more belief and confidence in Allah subhanho wa taala. Taking the necessary precautions, taking the necessary measures and having firm belief in Allah subhanahu wa. Allah tells us in the Quran that all forms of glory and dignity and honor and respect where does it come from? It comes from Allah subhanho wa taala. Man, can you read Eliza vallila healers to Jamia whoever desires dignity and honor than to God does all dignity and honor belong to

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when he left he says that while you're assuming he will mean And to Allah belongs all honor and honor belongs to his messenger and honor belongs to

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the believers.

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During the Fifth Level automotive photography allow Talon automotive in the hot tub was marching towards Damascus to its shot

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and with him was a famous Muslim general by the name of Abu Zubaydah mudra. And as they were marching in the wilderness, they came across a very small lake is pretty shallow.

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Not really enough for the horse for you to ride through it. But you need to get off so I'm a little hardtop, took his shoes off, descended, dismounted, took his shoes off, and rolled his pants up and he got into the water and he led his own camel through

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and so Aveda, he said, Yeah, immediate meaning you're coming down yourself and doing all this and I need someone can do it for you. You don't need to get into this mess yourself.

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I'm on top of the Allahu Taala and he said a Boveda will to you if if someone else had said this would have been the downfall of the Muslims.

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And then he said these golden words in Hakuna Avila comienza as and Allahu Islam. The Maha not localiza betrayed him as an Allahu Allah and Allah. Allah subhanho wa Taala has has honored us with Islam unless we used to be lowly without the game and now Allah has honored you with to do

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so whenever we seek glory and dignity and respect in other than Islam, we will be debased and we will be humiliated.

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Hamed allows salam ala Rasulillah Allah

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in the Journal of social issues,

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there was a professor by the name of Jennifer Crocker, and she did a very excellent university admission. And she did a very extensive research

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on the motivating factors of self esteem, specifically with students. And so she tracked them over the year of three years, freshman in college. And so she started looking and interviewing them before they went in and throughout the three years.

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And she discovered that, in her initial findings, she wanted to get the preliminary survey of the opinions. And she asked them, the students, about 600 of them, what do you think drives your self worth and self esteem? And what makes you feel good about yourself? And the overwhelming 80% of them said their academics. Their academics is what gives them self esteem.

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And in fact, 60 to 70%

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of the respondents who were women,

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right, said that their looks and appearances was very important to them of how they feel their own self worth,

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not saying right or wrong, and as she followed them throughout the few years, she realized that those who overwhelmingly put

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their academic rigor and success and getting good grades as the yardstick of their own self worth

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Despite the fact that they were actually academically inclined and very, very smart, it did not increase them in their grades at all.

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In fact, it gave them stress.

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It gave them mental anguish and anxiety.

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So we didn't actually improve statistically you didn't improve their performance.

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But when she looked at students who based their self esteem on internal factors

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Yeah, Annie, their beliefs, their virtues, their moral standards, she found that they received higher grades. They derive their self worth from meaningful values that they hold true in their hearts.

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And that is why betanin Sisters, we have to be careful regarding where we derive our self esteem. And where do we get the sources of honor and dignity.

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And psychologists have told us that it's both innate, something that is inside of you, as well as external. And we're not saying external factors don't play a role. But what we are telling you as believers, as people who have been honored by Allah subhanahu wata, Isla, that don't take external factors too seriously.

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It affects you, but what affects you more is what is inside your heart and how you view yourself.

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The prophets Allah Salam tells us, mechanical after him more JAL, Allah Who Zina who people the word Yama, Allahu Shimla, whoever, who is, whoever's there, at their main focus is the ossetra, Allah subhanahu. Wa to Allah will make him feel content. And whoever Allah subhanho and whoever it is, their focus is on the dunya alone, because that's where they think that's where the success is. All they focus is on this worldly affair, the materialistic world. jaal Allahu fucka, beignet, Allah will put poverty between their eyes. In other words, that's all they see. Why does that person drive a BMW and why I don't drive it. Why is that person in it with a bigger house, and I don't have it,

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if I don't buy this bigger house than I have less than I lose faith in the community? What are people going to say all of these things, hinder your view of your self worth?

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Brothers and sisters, a couple of things before we conclude regarding some pointers that I want to share with you, that will enable us to have a good view of our own self.

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Number one, be sincere to yourself. Don't focus so much on what people will say, don't focus so much on what people think of you. Think about what Allah thinks of you think about what you're doing is right or wrong. And now you hear in the media, you have young people coming up, and they'll say like, you know, I love my haters. I love my haters, and I love to prove them wrong. And that's on the other extreme, if you really think about it, what drives your success is not your haters, for the love of God. It's not the haters that drives you.

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Because when you focus on your haters, you're now not focusing on what you actually need. But you're trying to become stubborn to prove them wrong. And that's not being true to yourself, for that have shown us was shown and do not fear the opinion of your Don't be so afraid of what other people think if you aren't doing something that is right, doesn't matter what people think. And that's why we have to be very careful about what kind of standards our society puts on us regarding our value, you go to corporate America, and you find that the value of people is specifically on the bottom line and numbers and performance. And they don't take into consideration the intangibles of an employee

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of if this employee brings a certain soft skill to the table, that even though they might not be as technical in this role, but they bring a certain skill set that boosts the job performance that enhances cooperation among the teams. For a lot of these people. They don't think about these things. They just how much money did they bring in sales and performance and metrics? And that's how they view it. And in many ways we are accustomed to that. We judge our worth based on external factors, what school you went to, what was your GPA, what car you drive, what house you have, what vacations you take, and we think that that's what makes us special. And that is not what makes us

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special.

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Additionally, brothers and sisters having telecoil in Allah subhanahu wa taala in times like we see now where there is concern and even panic with the Coronavirus that we have

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Do you see certain people just completely utterly without even thinking, just making unilateral decisions and going to the store and buying things that they don't need? Like for example, toilet paper? Last time I checked Coronavirus does not cause diarrhea.

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Okay. And you go to the store and there, sanitizers all 30 of them into their cart. They think that this I mean that you buy a few but they take all 30 of them put them into the cart if you said Can I please get one instead? Nope.

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They've lost any any hinderance or semblance excuse me of self respect, have to look good in the last countdown take the night necessary. measures when Musa alayhi salatu salam was ordered to go back to the throne.

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He was afraid that found was going to humiliate him.

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But yet Allah subhanahu wata, Allah says, Santa should do.

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We will strengthen you with your brother. And he said, Allah I'm afraid that my speech is stuttery and I cannot argue and debate and Allah is trying to hold to Allah fixed it for him, gave him strength.

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Finally, but other than sisters

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part of having good confidence and self respect and dignity is knowing how much you have good going for you. Being grateful for what you have. The angels make dua for you. Those lessons on the ASHA woman Hala, you sit behind the behind.

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You said behind the behind him, the angels around the throne of Allah subhanaw taala they are glorifying Allah subhana hotel when stuck through

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Amazon and they are doing a step forward for you. April he made two for you. And then he set up new alayhi salatu salam may do it for you. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam may do it for you.

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You have the prophets and the angels making dua for you. And best yet on this kind of hola to Allah accepts all of your DUA and the Allah might have said when you make it two or three things happen, either Allah answers it or removes a harm from you, or he gives you something better on the Day of Judgment.

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So remember, you have a lot of things going for you instead of being sad about your situation.

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In Allah Hamanaka who saloon Alain de vida your holiday in Amman or sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Otis Lima Allahumma Salli ala Muhammad Ali Mohammed coma Selita lab Rahim Allah al Ibrahim in Canada Majeed alberic Allah Muhammad wa ala Muhammad Kamal Baraka Ibrahim Al Ali Ibrahim indica Homido Majeed but other than attina for dunya Hassan who fill Afra to Hazara Athena data now, Robin Allah to say hello Donna by data data now have learned amyloid and Kurama in Intel hub, and at this time of our need, we ask Allah subhanho wa Taala to protect all of you and your families from anything that you are worried about whether it is bacterial or viral, whatever it is Nilus Panatela protect

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you and your families. And do not forget to rely on Allah's towel and take the necessary means welcome and salam