Death: A Positive Outlook

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AbdelRahman Murphy

Channel: AbdelRahman Murphy

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.

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hamdulillah Illa De Anza. Allah Allah up the hill kita Willa major Allah who

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will hamdulillah

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from the de la Hilary lemelin 1am nuleds while I'm yaku Khufu and Ahad from Alhamdulillah no matter who you know who are still through whenever we learn human surely unforeseen a woman say Dr. Medina man yeah the level fella Malala woman

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Hala pasado en la la la la wash the who la sharika shadow Anna Mohammed Abu Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam en la raza la all Allahu taala Thank you Debbie Hill Kareem bagudu Billahi min ash shaytani r Rajim kulu knifes in the episode

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about

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wherever having non Muslims over to discuss a topic for interfaith or someone converts to Islam. Or if young people start to attend halaqaat or lectures or Sunday school people will be wanting to learn more about either their religion, Islam, or they want to be other people want to learn about our religion, Islam, one of the topics that is kind of difficult to discuss a topic that people really don't like hearing about

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his death.

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And it's natural, right part of this life is that we enjoy it part of this life is that we love being alive. No one wakes up and says I want to die today. Right? Part of our existence is that we want to keep going. We want to keep doing what we got to do right and procreate and have families and keep our families going.

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So the topic of death is a very sensitive topic. And it's very sensitive in a manner about teaching it as well and talking about it as well. I do a weekly halaqa called the good life in Knoxville where I'm from. And one of the topics for one of the weeks we talked about vanity, we talked about modesty. We talked about treating your parents Well, we talked about sand we talked about a lot of topics about this giftedness, purifying the heart and the soul. But wasn't one week we decided to talk about death. And when I announced the topic in front of everyone, they all kind of sunk in their chairs. Because I'm talking to a bunch of teenagers and telling them one day, this life that

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you enjoy that you've only been here for a few years, relatively speaking, is going to end.

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And after I introduced the topic, I saw all their faces. And I saw that when you mentioned the title or the topic of death or the fact that we all will die.

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I asked myself, I said, this is something that

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is not supposed to make you feel terrible. This is something that's not supposed to deflate you and paralyze you spiritually when someone says you're going to die. We're not supposed to feel apathetic, that I have no control on my life is going to be wasted. And I'm going to Hellfire regardless when someone reminds you about death.

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And I asked myself the question I said, why is this the case that whenever we bring up the topic that we are going to pass away?

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Whenever we bring up this topic, Why are people so upset? And the answer that came to mind when I talked to all of my young people in my halaqa and I asked them why are you Why are you so like averse to discussing this topic? They said because it's always used to scare us. Whenever we do something incorrect. Right? The imam of the masjid or our parents or uncle's or undies May Allah bless all of them and protect all of them our beloved elders, I mean,

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they said whenever we make a mistake, the finger always comes in Wags at us and says you're gonna die.

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Right? If not by me and someone else, right? You're gonna pass away. And so they develop this adverse reaction to hearing about death. And the reason why is because the narrations in the Koran the verses in the Quran and the narrations of the Prophet so send them have been taken out of context misused. It's true. Allah subhanaw taala talks about death. It definitely true. It's true. The Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam speaks about death. It's for sure true. But look at the framework. Look at the paradigm look at the parameters in which he set it up and see then the mental effect that it has. I know that this is a little bit of an introduction, but it's important

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to get this going. The Prophet Muhammad SAW son them and the idea that I quoted by the way in beginning coluna, Sunday for the mouth to Molina format, Elena.

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Last Martha says that every soul will taste death. But then what does he say after it? He says for my Elaine so Jonathan, and then you're going to return to us. And some people might say oh, we're going to return we're gonna but we should think positively Allah subhanaw taala says, the way that my servant thinks of me is the way that I am.

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So if a servant thinks and reads that ayah and says we're gonna return to Allah, yet, we're gonna go

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Agenda shuttling see a lot smarter than be with Allah. And that's the way that Allah spawn tada will be the Prophet Mohammed so send them would tell the companions remember often the destroyer of pleasures always remember the destroyer of pleasures, meaning what? That something that ends pleasures. One time the companions were sitting in the masjid. And then we're having a little bit of a good time. And the prophet SAW Selim showed up. And he told them, he said, If you knew what I knew about the afterlife, you would laugh less and you would cry a little bit more. And this narration is stuffy. And people a lot. They talk about this narration a lot, and they try to scare people. But

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you know, what's interesting is that there's another, the wire. There's another narration in this chain, same story. But people don't quote it.

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People don't quote it. I don't know why. Where the prophet SAW send them went. And he left that gathering, and Angel, Jabra, Eli ceram came to him, I talked to Ceylon. And he told him, he said, You had a school of law, or Mohammed or messenger of Allah, go back, go back in and give them good news. Because the way in which you left them less than depressed,

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you walked in and you told them something. And it really sat in their heart, it deflated their spirits. So go back and give them some bush raw, some good news about how Jenna is going to be amazing and awesome. And so when we look and we see even the Prophet Muhammad still send them by the way, the prophets have said and had good times when he says you should laugh, little and cry more. This is coming from a man who used to enjoy himself as well. I suppose to them. He was very funny. One time an older woman walked up to him and said, Yes, Lola, am I you know, are older women like me? Are we going to be in gender? And he said, Nope, definitely not.

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And she was like, Are you serious? He said, Yeah, and she got a little emotionally upset. And he said, because when you enter gender, you will be young.

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So you play a little joke. One time he was sitting with rhodiola Han, and they were all sitting in a in a gathering the companions and they were just hanging out there was just so callkit say they were thug in it. They were just kicking it. And they were eating some dates. And someone grabbed the attention of the Prophet Muhammad SAW Selim, so they would eat a date. They would take out the pit and they would put it on the ground. And one of the others hobby he grabbed. He said Yes, a little I have a question. So they started that they began to discuss and so Ahmad in the hot tub thought it would be funny. Remember, this is the arm or the one when I say almost a thought everyone imagines a

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sword. They don't imagine a person for some reason, right?

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Omar thought it would be funny to take his date pits his seeds and pile them on to the profits. I'll send them seeds to make it appear as if the profits I'll send them ate a lot of dates. Right? So he did that when the prophet SAW said I'm By the way, interesting point about this story. You want to know how good the prophet SAW sent him was that conversation. He didn't notice that Omar was doing this because he was so focused in talking to a companion. He was so focused in talking to him he didn't even notice what was going on. That's how focus when he talks to people he looks it still cinema so to say no, Mohammed. So Omar puts all the all the seeds on top.

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And then he looks back, the prophet Sultan looks back. And Omar kind of loudly in the group tried to play a joke says you had a civil law. You must have been really hungry. You had a lot of dates. And Mohammed salsa lamb being like the ultimate man, I so sedan so yeah, Omar, you must have been even more hungry. Could you eat your seeds?

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This was a man who although he would remind the companions laugh little cry more. But he would also indulge, he would also give them the human side be real with them. And so you find that the prophet SAW Selim leaves the balance model. He wasn't walking around shaking a stick and a finger at everyone death death, you're gonna die. Remember this? But how did he do it?

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Did he paralyze? And did he deflate? No, there's two lessons from today's call.

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In which whenever we think about death,

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whenever we talk about death, these are the two lessons that we need to remember inshallah, this whole book is taught is called or titled or the thesis of it is how remembering death can better your life.

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And the first way that we should all view death. The first is motivating,

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is motivating. And let me give you an example. It might be a little sore for a lot of you, but you'll understand what I'm talking about.

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In a basketball game, there's four quarters, each quarter is 12 minutes.

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If a game is coming down to the end of its time, and the score is tied, each player wants to win the game. Some want to win it more than others, some nowhere to be found in the fourth quarter, right?

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One of those players who historically has always wanted to have the ball in his hands. If the game is tied 100 to 100. And there's 10 seconds left. He's the one saying give me the ball. I want to win the game for us. One of the players

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After Michael Jordan, from Chicago is Kobe Bryant and if you watch Kobe Bryant play, you see that whenever the game is close, he's not going to run and hide in the corner and let Dwayne Wade take over. He's not going to go and say, coach, Coach, take me out, I'm not ready for this. What does he say? He says, I am motivated, the time is running out. But in my heart, I want to win this game, I know that I only have one shot. But I want to be the one to take it and I want to win this game. This brothers and even though I'm not a Lakers fan, this is the spirit of a Muslim in regards to death. When a Muslim lives their life, and they see that the years are going by that they felt like

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they were 20 3040. And now they're getting older and they realize it's inevitable that will happen. It will take every single one of us

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they're not their spirit of a Muslim is not to become upset or frustrated or deflated or paralyzed spiritually. The spirit of a Muslim is to say, this is my shot. This is my this is the end of the game. I got to make sure that I win this. Take a lesson first time and last time Kobe Bryant will ever be used as a reference in the whole book. take a lesson from his game style. When life is ending and death is a reality. Don't be the one to sit on the sidelines. Don't let it pass you by and then wonder what's going to happen if Am I going to win the game and go to agenda or am I going to lose take life into your own hands.

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And if we remember death, often as the prophet SAW Selim commanded us to do, there are three things there are three things that it will do for us.

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The first and foremost

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is that it will make our relationship with our Creator, our Lord Allah subhanho wa Taala it will make it better. Why? Because when someone is remembering death, not in a depressing way, but in a motivating way, when someone remembers that at one time, all of this will go the Laker season gone. Right? All of this will end who lumen Ali have fat I lost my father says everything will be gone destroyed. When someone remembers this. They remember what but Allah says everything will be destroyed, except for himself, except for his face, except for Allah. So when someone lives life, knowing that everything is going to be gone, I'm going to work for the permanent, I'm going to work

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for Allah subhanaw taala. And so we know that my life is not guaranteed, I might walk out of this mess today and get in the car, may Allah protect us all. And something might happen to me. And I might pass away. Did I give this club but for the right reasons? Did I come to Irvine for the right reasons? Was I sincere for Allah subhanaw taala. That's, that's the whole point. That's the whole purpose. And so each and every one of us when we think about death, we think about Am I doing it for Allah? am I working for a lot? Am I taking care of my family in the right way for Allah? Am I going to school and getting good grades for Allah? Am I treating my wife and my parents? And my kids? Am I

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treating them well for a lot? Because at the end, Allah is all that matters.

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At the end of it all, it doesn't matter whether or not you drive a Mercedes or BMW or an Audi, it doesn't matter. Really. It doesn't matter. Well, I drive a Honda Civic, trust me, it does not matter.

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What matters is did you do for Allah? Did you drive that Audi to the message for Allah? Did you take that Mercedes and pack it up with things and donate it to charity for Allah?

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Or was it all just for other people's sake. So the first way that remembering death will better your life now is by remembering Allah. The second

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is that it will force you. If someone really truly believes that at any moment, they could die, it will force you to become a better person with other people. You won't feel comfortable and I won't feel comfortable treating people badly. Because I know that somehow this might be the last time that I have in or interact with you.

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There's a you know, there's a lot of brothers Apollo, there was like four or five of my students from Chicago. There was two young people 17 years old each. They were driving a very fast sports car that belonged to one of their fathers. And they were going extremely fast. And they were going to hang out with their Muslim friends. They weren't doing anything bad. Besides speeding, which is bad.

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They were going and they actually bumped into the car in front of them got sideswiped and rolled and flipped the car. It was a rear engine car. So on impact, it exploded and they died on impact.

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May Allah give them

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and give their parents patience. Because it's been years now. But I heard that the mother still can't even walk into her son's room.

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is the one thing that hit me was that after they passed away, we did some counseling with the kids. We said you know, as older brothers if you want to come talk to us, we're here for you. A lot of the kids said the last experience they ever had with one or one or both of the brothers was they got into like a dumb argument, man. Something that was dumb. Like, man, you didn't pass me the bone up on the court.

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When we're eating at the restaurant, we ordered chicken shawarma, you took mine first. And they got into some argument that doesn't matter. And that was the last dialogue conversation that they had with them.

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And I'm not saying that these brothers are these people were negligent of death. But what I'm saying is that what remembering death will do is that it'll make you at the end of it all. At the end of it all, the conversation, the argument, it'll make you say, you know what, this doesn't matter. let's just, let's just make up. Let's just fix things. Remember, shakra, your harmala, a very famous scholar, extremely famous, was arguing with one of his students was arguing was debating, and the debate got so heated, that his student got up in the middle of the class, like hundreds of people. And he said, You know, I'm done with this. I'm sick of it. And he walked away, he began to walk with

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speed. And remember, shafr, he could have done what he could have sat there and be like, go, I have hundreds of other students. Good luck, right? He could have done that. He's a member of Jeffrey. But he wasn't arrogant. He didn't have kibber. In his heart, he didn't have pride in his heart. He was humble, he got up himself. He chased after his students. And he grabbed him by the hand and said, Don't forget that we're brothers. His argument we had our blood, our lat Illallah. Muhammad, also love between us is thicker than that.

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So if we live life, remembering death, will never ever feel comfortable having a bad relationship or a bad conversation with someone.

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And the last way in which death will make our life better remembering death will make our life better is that it will make us people who do Zen. And Zen is kind of like an abstract Arabic word that people use sometimes, but I'm going to translate it for you here. ascend means trying your best 110% giving everything you've got that sn SMEs, doing everything you can to reach the goal of successful along with Allah. And if someone remembers that, they're not going to feel satisfied with second place, they're not going to feel satisfied with mediocrity. We're not satisfied as Muslims with mediocrity, we want the best. And some people translate that to doctor, right. But what we say

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is that anything you're doing whatever you do, be the best at it. If you're a student in school, be the best if you're a parent, you have kids, be the best parents. Don't feel satisfied with not being the best parent with your kids. If you're a child, be the best child. Don't feel satisfied with your parents saying Yeah, he was good. There was some things that he lacked on. Try your best and yes, we will hit bump bumps in the road, we will hit obstacles, but always bounce back, bounce back from them, shall we ask the last round solid to make us amongst those who remember death and not in a way that paralyzes us not in a way that deflates us, but in a way that makes us realize and motivates us

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towards Allah subhanaw taala and we asked the last prophet Allah to make this clip a reminder for all of us, including the feed. We asked a lot to allow us to practice what has been said in butthurt Akali Kali hada was suffered a la jolla welcome What do you say the Muslim non Muslim acts for stuff through in who who will have a full regime

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hamdulillah from the Rila horrible aalameen or salat wa salam O Allah Ashraf al anbiya wa muslimeen Cena Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi woman Xavier from the ascending Isla Yomi Deen about

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I think it's important to highlight that in this hood. But the way that Islam preaches of the last rounds, Allah says is in nutjob knuckle moments on Walsall thought that he made us a nation that is balanced, that is moderate that is in the middle path. And so I think it's very important to discuss that when we remember death as human beings as people who know that we're going to die the inevitable. We remember in between two extremes we don't become depressed. And we're not like happy go lucky, like cultish about death. But we're in the middle. We realize that it's real, it's going to happen. But we work hard for it. One practical tip besides the three that I've given in the

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previous hope, but one practical tip that I'd like to end this football on.

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And I think that it's very important.

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And it doesn't really matter what age you are.

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Is that if you have parents,

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even if they've passed away.

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This is the moment where we realized that we have to treat our parents the best we can.

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And as someone who moved away from his parents, two years ago, young people I can tell you, I had nothing more in my heart. When I was living with my parents in Chicago. I had nothing more than I wanted to move out and get my own place. I could not wait.

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Right and at some point I think my parents also couldn't wait right?

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The first night that I got to my place in Dallas, I lived in Dallas for a year. The first night that I was there as a big man have my own place have my own car, right could go anywhere could do anything. No curfew, right. Watch TV ESPN is on like I just leave it on for no reason.

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I was on the living room carpet of my foot on my floor in my living room. I was crying like a baby.

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Seeing that I missed my mom.

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And this is coming from a six foot three

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260 pound Kevin Love look alike, right?

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I missed my mommy. I call her on the phone and I'm crying and she's crying Of course, right?

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She's crying too, because I missed her.

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You know what I still miss my parents, I miss my dad and my mom is my family, I miss my brother, my sisters, I miss them. And it's part of life, sometimes you have to move away. Sometimes you have to do what you got to do.

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But it's important to always treat your parents the best because you never know when you're gonna have to move away. And even more serious, you never know when they're gonna have to leave you or you might leave them forever.

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And if any of us have lost our parents,

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you know more than I know what I'm saying to you.

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And so today is the day

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that we decide, no matter what level we're at.

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To treat our parents better. No matter where your parents are, call them, text them. If you see them in person, give them a hug. Call your parents tell them that you love them.

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Tell them that you love them. If your parents have passed in our with a less common Tada, make dua and give something on their behalf. That's a way that you tell them that you love them, even though they're not here anymore. with us. Also on the other side of your parents, like I said, My two students there were like four or five and brothers were from Chicago, you know that Chicago had a really bad rash of young people dying for a while. Parents lost their kids.

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Parents, we got to make sure that the last thing we always say to our kids, no matter what the conversation is, is I love you.

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Always we have to make sure that the last thing we say,

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express love so much. Because you don't want to end up in a situation where you wish that you could have or you wish that you still could. But you can't we asked the last part of how to make us better to our parents, and better to our kids. And even if you're not here with us, we asked a lot to let us honor their legacy for their sake and for ours. We asked the last parents Allah to liberate and give protection and victory to our brothers and sisters in Syria, in Egypt, in Pakistan, and Afghanistan. And so then in Somalia, all over the world where people are suffering in America where people are suffering we asked Allah, Allah to give them relief, to give everyone a relief.

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Spiritually, financially, physically, mentally, we ask Allah subhanaw taala to uplift humanity from the darkness that it might be in right now into the light that he grabs us all into. We ask the last prophet Allah to make us true lovers of him and of the Prophet Mohammed Salah Sutherland. And we asked the last part Tata to grant us the success of being on the Sunnah of the prophet SAW send them in many ways that it can be put on and we asked the last part Allah to make us those who have amen in our hearts and in our families and in our communities. And we ask Allah to bless us And forgive us according to the high level stuff that a lot of you would have them in the law of America to who

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you subdue in other Navy. Yeah, you will live in Amarillo Sadhguru he was selling with Athena Lama, Surya Muhammad Ali Muhammad came so later on I brought him on and he brought him in NACA for me, the Medina allama baddeck. Allah Mohammed Mohammed came about after Allah Ebrahim, rather early brought him in Mecca from even Majeed in the LA one with the word Sn. What you gave them What about when? When is it when manconi will buggy er the compiler come to that karoun aqui masala