Learn To Live Life In A Healthy and Holistic Way

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Yasmin Mogahed

Channel: Yasmin Mogahed

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Now when talking about this, this, this idea of finding peace within the hardship, his entire entire section about this, but I just want to talk about just a few points today about

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how we can change our view how we can change our lens, in terms of how we see the world around us how we see our experiences, and then that changes our response. So I just want to basically leave you with a few points. Okay, the first myth that we need to change. And I think one of the most important things that we have to remember about this life generally, is that there is no such thing as just hard times, there is no such thing as all bad. When you are going through a hardship, it is never all bad. And this is one of the aspects one of the the, the part of the nature of dunya is that it is never all bad. And it is never all good. Okay, so the first thing we have to understand

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about this life, and I can just tell you this from personal experience, you know, anyone who's read Reclaim Your heart probably knows that, you know, chapter one, from the very beginning of the book, I talked about how I was always sort of very idealistic, perfectionist, I expected everything to be perfect. And so long as I went through my life, and I did this for a long time, way too long, that that so long as I went through my life expecting everything to be perfect, expecting every, every person around me to be perfect. I was constantly disappointed, I was constantly let down I was constantly upset. Right? And, and the reason why that happened is because I had this very, very

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unrealistic expectation that things were supposed to be perfect. This the things were so had to be a certain way. And when they weren't, I was I was devastated. It was very difficult for me to deal with disappointment. And I think that the biggest mistake that I made was in my expectation. So I thought that, you know, but but it has to be this way. And it was almost as though I had this subtle sort of belief underlying all of it, that that I was already in Jenna, you know, like, almost as though I was interacting with Julia in the way that Jenna is. And having that type of interaction or expectation of this life will break your heart, it will destroy you internally, you will never find

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peace, because you're expecting something that is in perfect by its very nature to be perfect. Jenna is perfect. Dunya is not now part of that understanding that this life is not perfect. It actually works both ways. So the same way that this life is not perfectly good. It is also not perfectly bad, either. And this is another concept I really, you know, I really discussed deeply in the class transformed, I also touched upon it in Reclaim Your heart is that once I changed that mentality once I changed that understanding, and I recognize that this life is not perfect, good. And it is not perfectly bad either. So what that means is that while you are going through your hardest time, I

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just got a message recently, one sister told me she's just gone through a devastating divorce, you know, she feels broken. And she's asking, How do I get through it? You know, do you have any advice. And this is this is so many people can relate to this, when you go through a very, very difficult time. Maybe you're in it right now. But while you're in that time,

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to be able to recognize that it is not all black, that it is not all dark that it is not all bad, even in your hardest time. And that takes a different lens and a different understanding. Because

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it's very easy for us. And I think this is part of like the way the brain is almost wired is that we tend to focus on the negative things in our lives, we tend to focus on what our brain considers

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a danger or some sort of threat, right? So whenever we have a fear, for example, our tendency is to focus on the fear and to exaggerate the fear through that focus. So this is another principle that you should always remember and that is that whatever you focus on will grow

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So in this case, if we focus on the fear or we focus on the,

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what is upsetting us, or what we've lost, or what we what's hurting us, maybe if we focus on what's hurt us in the bat in the past, or what we've lost in the past, that that particular pain actually starts to become exaggerated in our own mind and in our hearts. So focus is essential expectation is essential. As soon as you realize that this life isn't perfect, you start to become more realistic in your expectations and then you start to be able to respond to things in a better, more sort of holistic and healthy way.