What Can We Learn From Our Children?
Channel: Waleed Basyouni
File Size: 17.11MB
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about 32 times a line the Quran mentioned offsprings. The word really mean children offsprings. And that's to signifies the importance of this subject. But often, when we talk about the subject, we always focus on how we protect them, how we take care of them, how we should provide for them, teach them. That's the obvious things and I understand that because of current order us to do all of this. And it's a natural thing, as the prophet SAW some of them said, Oh, each and every one of you is a shepherd, and you will be our and responsible for his or her flocks. So the father is a shepherd, the mother and so forth.
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So that's obvious. But I'm not here to speak to you today about this obvious concept.
which is I think it's important, but my talk to you today is about another perspective when it comes to children, since it's a such such important topic, often mentioned in the Quran in more than 19 chapters. There is another perspective I wanted to look at, which is what can we learn from our children? And instead of us just always playing the role of teaching them? What can we learn from them by observing them observing, they're observing their natural state, the skills that Allah have provided them with the moment they came out of their mother's womb.
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It's very interesting how persistence our children are persevering is something very noticeable in children, that they are goal oriented. Whenever they have a goal, they will do every possible thing to achieve their goals. No matter how big the obstacle is. I wish us as an adult, we learn from this. And to know the importance first of having goals in life to that we don't give up our goals in life very easily. So many of us have giving up their dreams in life, just because of one or two, three challenges have switched their directions in life, just because they couldn't get it in the first time.
I hope that us as an adult, as individuals, families, and even organizations and society, that we have clear goals and live we know what we want to achieve. We want one what we want to be what the change that we want to see and how are we going to do them having a plan. Unfortunately, it does something not common at all, even though it's obvious that we don't have goals and clear goals in life. Many Muslim organization I visited and when I asked them Imam of the masjid or the organization around the center, or leaders in the community, what is your goal for your community? What do you want your community to be in five years from now? What's the goal that you play in this
society? What exactly what you want? Most of the time, they just want to pass by most of the time they just want to live the day that the living most of the time they just want to survive, and they don't have any really goal that they thrive for, or they are interested to achieve.
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It's so interesting, that one time I was visiting one of that Muslim organization and he saw this beautiful building. And I said, What is this building going to be? Then they said we don't know yet. We haven't figured that out yet. I said you already have the building you build something is not something that you purchase. You build it, you designed it and you don't have even clear goals than what you want.
I want to say unfortunately, so many of us today.
In the midst of this turmoil, world, in the midst of this time of confusion, and pressure,
we not anymore driven by our dreams and goals. As individuals,
we are driven by our problems and challenges. And there is a big huge difference between the two. Between every day you walk up in the morning, and every month, you look at the upcoming month or upcoming year, and you're driven by your dreams and goals that you want to achieve in life, versus what is controlling your mind as the problems and the challenges that you have in your life.
I'm sure you guys in this part of the world very familiar with the work of Martin Luther King.
And he had a very famous speech. And he said in that speech, I have a dream. Have you heard of that? When he said I have a dream? I always asked myself, and that speech was I have a problem.
What will be the outcome? How will be the different? It's exactly how we are many times when I visit so many communities as I'm visiting your community today, or once a year, even in the airport before I left the airport of Copenhagen. I was hearing about all these problems and challenges that people face.
It's so rare when you visit people and you talk they talk to you about their dreams. And they talk to you about their goals and they talk to you about what they want to achieve and what the opportunities that's out there.
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one of the thing about children, they have very pure heart, willing to forgive so quickly,
willing to let it go. You upset them, you make it up with them, and they will forgive you and you move on. And they will not bring the old stuff. They don't hold grudges. I wish us as an adult will learn from them. We'll learn how to forgive. We'll learn how to let it go. Some people you're so good to them all your life, and maybe you did something wrong to them once in your life and that's about it. He will cancel you he will curse you you will never talk to you. And every time he sees you or she sees you, he will or she will always remember what you did. Always remember the false. Always remember the mistakes, not willing to forgive and not willing to let go
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One of the thing about children and this is one my favorite quality of children, basically smiling and laughing.
Children, an average child will laugh about 200 times a day. While an average adult, an average adult will smile and laugh between seven to 14 times a day. Laugh 14 seven to 14 times a day. I can guarantee you this percentage among Muslim community is way less out and about Danish in general. But, you know,
I don't know about the country here and the culture here. But I can tell you that in Muslim community in general, this percentage unfortunately goes way low, comparing to the average person in the public and whatever reasons that is not an acceptable because smiling is part of our Deen part of our sin. And I can testify for that as a speaker who traveled the world and into so many massages so many places and it's very rare when you meet something some people that you are people that you don't know they will smile at you in the master. They always checking you out. Looking at you like what's this guy here for?
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You know, smiling doesn't only make people around you feel good, it makes you feel good. All studies, new studies in psychology science, they'll suggest that our physiology impact our psychology. If smile, look up, straight back, you make your back straight. And always be able to put yourself in a happy mood, you will be happy.
Have this serious look in your face and get an angry look in your face. You can be you're gonna feel bad, you're gonna feel angry. That's how as simple as that.
You know, if you read a lot about I come from Houston, Texas.
And our city in the United States or Houston is we have the first Hospital in the world who start treating people with laughter Believe it or not.
We're basically a whole section treating people who have a long term illness by nothing but bringing in clowns and making them happy and bringing comedians and make people happy and there is a study you can read it there's no time in the hope to speak about it. But it will be interesting some something to look out. Doctors talk about the research you're talking about something in our bodies called natural killer cells became more active and larger numbers. Whenever you smile often a common thing between people who live long life that's basically they have what they have basically a good sense of humor.
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Trusting is a very interesting quality in children.
And I wish us as an adult, we learn that as well. That we tend I found out that the people who trust others much happier, better leaders, but those who always who never trust anyone, never trust their kids. Never trust their family. Never trust the government. Never trust their leaders. Never trust any person. And always doubt everybody and everything.
You tell them hey give the youth opportunity to make to be true leaders. I'm not sure if I can trust them.
Hey makes us give the sister opportunity to lead. Give women an opportunity to do this. I'm not sure if I can trust them. Hey, why don't you basically work with us I can trust what about people from other cultures to adopt? I don't trust them.
There is a new law maybe it's in your best friends I can trust it.
And everything is like that. And conspiracy theory comes with that and all this kind of lifestyle that it became the end of the day and disaster you put yourself and you lock yourself in a cell and a dark roll.
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Adjusting, as I said, is one of the amazing abilities for kids. I wish as an adult, we learn how to do that. We still have people trapped in the 90s and 70s and 60s, and you know, we are in 2017.
We're in 21st century, British people can adjust and realize the fact that you know what, I live in Europe, I live in Denmark, I'm not living anymore.
In one of these countries that I maybe my me or my parents came from.
I can adjust that my kids, my daughter, she's a married woman, my son is a married man, he's not any more a kid.
I cannot just let my kids now as a college students, I can treat him the same way I treat him when you're in middle school.
I can adjust that my kids now is basically a man or a woman. And I need to treat them in a way different than that used to be. I can adjust to that.
Have a person in my community? He said, Jeff, I lost my job. I said what used to is a chemist. I said would you used to sit here I used to work in the same company for the last 19 years or so.
Is that okay? What do you do is that one formula I mastered that and they move on. They don't need this formula anymore. Obviously. You should have figured that out a long time ago.
That you need to learn something new to be able to adjust to the new changes happening to the world.
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kids never stop learning, discovering the world around them. Oh, this is a hot surface, I learned now that this is something I shouldn't touch. And they basically discover things as they grow. And they never stop learning.
I don't we stop that quite a bit.
The ability to learn the ability to discover yourself the skills that you have. A lot of people find out that they can do so many things. They never knew that they can do it before.
Don't ever give up on yourself.
You know, go learn, read a book, learn something new learn skills, new skills.
I started a class in my community, for example, and helping people to know more about, you know, computers and you know, one on one kind of I was very pleased to see that the number of people who just are among people in their 60s in their 50s were quite large number of people want to learn more to basically develop their skill
in another course
About simple things that you can do simple skills that you can learn. We have a Toastmaster program if you're familiar with that means, which is basically something enable you to have a good public speaking skills. You know most of the people are just an hour program where people who are in their 50s
they learning of new skills,
and so forth. You can learn so many things, courses you can take in university online, even free many universities or free courses today. The point is, don't stop learning. Don't stop discovering yourself and the world around you.
My boy, think that he's the fastest boy in the world.
His girl thinks she's the most beautiful girl in the world. Kids have sense of confidence. I wish us as an adult, we have that confidence in ourselves.
We walk while our head is up. I'm not ashamed of my religion. I'm not ashamed of my last name. I'm not ashamed of my skin color.
not ashamed of who I am or which culture I came from. The only thing can shame me is my actions. Not the action of other people.
I never felt shame when 911 took place in America. I stood up beside everybody there against that aggression. I'm never going to shame when a lieutenant I crazy ignorant person do something bad I wasn't ashamed when Trump was elected. I didn't like them and I standing and saying voice my voice I can assess policies
I'm not ashamed of who I am. I'm proud of who I am
I'm ashamed only find mistakes and sins and ignorance. The thing that I do you should have that sense of confidence in yourself confidence in the sooner that you carry on your practice confidence in the end that you have
to put your head down to bend your back. No that's not what's gonna solve the problem.
Nobody can ever ride your back I'm telling you bend your back
as long as you have that sense of confidence and pride know everybody will respect you
kids also know and with this
very active almost running Mashallah I don't make him so lazy.
tend to be very, very lazy. And that's even sad. Maybe you guys better than us in America. We're a little bit over there depend heavily on cars. Maybe you guys have public transportation and walking and biking and stuff like that. But in many times, you see, people became highly motivated to do nothing
became so lazy.
And that's not a good thing for your health. In Kenya studies bill Amina castle. I will ask you, Michelle
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kadem to Rasul Allah, I saw Sydney Metallica, Al Qaeda, 10 years I was the process I'm serving. He never asked me to do something for himself. By autosol, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, NASA, I made my gift promise to the Prophet, I would never ask someone to do something for me, I'll do it myself.
Because we notice so many diseases, and happening and health wise, it became an issue for so many community members. And one of the reasons that they don't die, they don't go to the gym on a regular basis. They don't make a walk in a regular base. They don't do a physical activity. It's like this guy who told the doctor when the doctor told him, Hey, your diabetes is your sugar level is high in your blood. He said, Oh, doctors, don't worry, you know, diabetes runs in the family. He said, Son, what I'm worried there's nobody in the family runs. That's why you're diabetic. It's not about runs in the family. So what you need to do, you need to learn from that to be a little bit more active in
your life. There's so many things we can learn from our children. So I hope this hope will inspire us to kind of learn from them. Learn and observe the world around us. There are so many things we can learn from my brothers and sisters, please treasure these talents. These qualities in your children, make them grow strong. We want to leave a generation better than ours. We want to bring in better generation than our generation.
Make sure that we innovate
Invest in these qualities. But the most important thing that your son and your daughter when they grow up, they are people who have skills have values in life principles in life.
I ask Allah Subhana Allah to help and to protect all of our families and our children. So in the last panel with data and you're in and
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