Tom Facchine – Riyadh al-Saliheen and Women’s Q&A #39

Tom Facchine
AI: Summary © The concept of "angry" is rooted in the south and not rooted in justice. It can be characterized as a feeling of pride, pride in one's appearance, pride in a job, pride in a relationship, or a desire to achieve something. The speakers discuss the importance of not giving too many false assumptions during conversations, the negative impact of men on women, and the use of "medicals to create pathways of habit and create negative emotions. They stress the importance of showing one's true oneself and avoiding accountability to avoid harm.
AI: Transcript ©
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and handling I have underlined a meaningless address

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on a shuffle MBA almost saline was handed over here for the solder is good to see. Hola Hola. I didn't know you may have found that and I'd be alarmed and that was even that and then out of Milan I mean

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to everybody welcome to Thursday night women's class

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we're still we're doing an onslaught of rain gardens of the righteous and we are still in the chapter of patience but we're nearing the end and we're dealing with a lot of Hadith about anger

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so without further ado why we go

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okay we finish the Hadith

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okay, I believe we left off with a hadith

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what on over a little the love and hope that he said the strat the prophesy centum said the strong man is not the one who is good at wrestling with a strong man is one who controls himself in the fit of rage. Now we're specifically talking about parenting, right? Topic and children.

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And the moderation that Allah expects of all of us

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in everything, especially anger, and that there's a difference between being angry for ourselves versus angry for the sake of Allah, and how anger for the sake of ourselves is required.

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When it comes to jihad, when it comes to establishing justice on Earth, sympathizing or empathizing with the oppressed, etc, etc. But when it's about our own, the anger can easily be an ego trip, right? It can easily be about us and about our hurt pride and about, et cetera, et cetera. And

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that is blameworthy and how the province has said I'm stressed.

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Controlling that latter type of anger, even if the first one has its own use. And this is a textbook example of that particular head of that particular

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type of guidance and instruction, where the process is not talking about every single type of anger. He's talking about being angry for your stuff, right selfish reasons for the ego, right strength, true strength is in controlling that type of anger because that is the type of anger that the devil seeks to incite and seeks to inflame and seeks to aggrandizing and develop in us as opposed to righteous anger, which is supposed to be directed towards establishing justice honor. So we had talked about that, and then the next Hadith 46.

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So the man, even Salam said that I was sitting with the problem. So Allahu alayhi salam, when two men began to quarrel and curse each other, and the face of one of those two men turned red, and the veins in his neck were swollen from rage. The messenger of allah sallallahu alayhi salam saw this, and said, I know of a word that if he were to utter it, if he's going to say it, then his rage will die down. And that is our OB Lahemaa shaytani R rajim. I seek refuge with Allah from the devil the accursed. So the companion said to him, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa salam tells you to say out the villa.

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And that's where the Hadith ends, we don't get the rest of the story, but we assume that it works.

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So some of the points that take from this hadith, one of the first is that this type of anger, again, as we just said, the type of anger that is not rooted in justice.

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But it's rooted in the south in the neffs, and the ego,

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our reputation, our sense of pride, our sense of what we deserve. This is the type of anger that needs to be controlled and this is the type of anger that the devil wants to develop and aggravates.

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Right? So, the reason why it's powerful. The reason why it's a powerful technique

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to say are older bIllahi min ash shaytaan regime is because that is the source of this type of

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Anger? Why is that the source of this type of anger?

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Because usually when we're angry, it's not. So an AR, this is not the noble type of anger that we're talking about. It's not so much

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about what the other person did or said,

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as it is, what it means to us. Right? And what it means to us is suggested to us by the devil, have you ever gotten into an argument with your spouse, and they say something that's, you know, could be interpreted a couple different ways.

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And the particular interpretation that you choose

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to hear their statement through is something that hurts you.

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So for example, I'll give an example from my own life, that way, we make it real. Okay, maybe I'm tired

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during the day, and I'm trying to

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just kind of lay down and relax. And the wife is also having a challenging day. And she asks me to change a diaper. Or she asked me to do the dishes.

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And then because I'm tired, and because all these etc, reasons and excuses.

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At the very least, let's say I don't jump at the opportunity. Right? I'm not at that level of taco yet, where I recognize my opportunity for reward with the law and I rise the occasion and smiling, you know, my face beaming say, of course, my dear, beloved wife, I will do this and more for you, etcetera, etcetera. No, I probably saw probably huff and puff. I might even say, okay, you know, maybe like, I'll do it later, five minutes, et cetera, et cetera. Okay. And then that sort of behavior

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can easily be interpreted as, okay, he doesn't respond to me, he doesn't heed my kind of like, take care of my needs. Proactively. Right?

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He, I've seen him respond with more urgency and immediacy to other things that aren't what would make my life easier. Therefore, he values my happiness less than he values those other things, right? All these sorts of interpretations, right? These sorts of things, as opposed to and this is how we can distinguish the say, they say the satanic suggestions

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from reality. Because every satanic suggestion could have a valid excuse on the other side, right? Instead of, you know, he's tired, he had a hard day at cetera, et cetera. And I should have picked an example that was the opposite. That was incriminating myself, let me let me press rewind there, and let's go to an example. That's more incriminating of myself. Right?

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I asked my wife for whatever, to make a cup of coffee for me. And she's got the baby in her arm, and she's doing this and the one kid is tugging on or whatever. And, and she's like, you know, could you please, could you please just do it yourself today? Right. And maybe she's not the most kind when she says that, because she's getting screamed at by the kids.

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Right? And then if I were to be, here we go, this is better. Because it's, you know, if I were to be, Oh, you don't put yourself forward and the service of your husband. And you know, this is not how I can even give you their little religious veneer and say, This is not how the self were. And this is not how the companions were, they were trying to strive in the service of their husbands, right? Things like that.

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This means that you don't care for me, this means that you don't, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Those are Satanic suggestions. Yes. Often, if not always satanic suggestions. Whereas the reality is that if I had made excuses, I would have said, Okay, obviously, she's having a hard day. Obviously, the kids are making her nuts. And she's got her hands full right now. And my coffee is not like very high on her priority list. And it's not because she doesn't love me or care for me. It's just because everybody else is kind of like fraying her nerves. Right? So this is exactly the type of role that the devil plays when it comes to our arguments, especially with with anybody but

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especially with our spouses and relatives. Right? Those choices of interpretation, right? If I'm going to take it because I'm not just understanding like, what she said at face value, it's not like I asked her for a cup of coffee and she just said no, no, okay, and I go, I'm making myself or I go out

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Number one, that would be taking it at face value, it's all of the meanings. And that I attach, and that I interpret from that act, oh, this is a symbol that this person values this other thing more than me, this is a symbol that they don't care enough for me, or I see how they, there's an asymmetry here, this person is acting more favorably to this other thing than to me, etcetera, etcetera, right? This is the ego. This is the ego. And the devil is very, very, very ready

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to exploit this, exploit this and to use it against us and to fan those flames like so the devil will suggest to us like That's right. Did you notice how, when we had guests over last time, she hopped up and made coffee right away. Right? So look at that she's trying to she cares more about impressing other people in the guests than she cares about you. Right? Or the kids are always getting you know, their thing before you. And if Did you remember when you visited this other family the other week? Oh, look at how the father, the head of the household was honored. And he got everything first, et cetera, et cetera, right? All those sorts of

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all those sorts of suggestions are from none other than the devil. And that's what hurts, not the actual thing that our spouse said, That's what hurts that what it could mean, what it could symbolize what it could signify. And that's what gets us hurt. That's what gets us sad. That's what gets us angry and upset. And that is what the devil wants. Yes, he wants us to seize upon that worst interpretation. And let it hurt us let it burn, and then react.

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this is why it's so effective, the prophetic guidance of a horse and I'm to say, I would argue the bIllahi min ash shaytaan regime, like I seek refuge in Allah from, from the curse of devil, right, because the devil is the one that's kind of egging us on, to adopt these specific interpretations and let it let us make mountains out of molehills.

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We also see the wisdom of the Prophet saw a sudden because and this is something that I hadn't noticed until right now, he doesn't tell the man directly.

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But he passes it along through the grapevine. Right, the companions are the ones who deliver the the message. And that has to be from wisdom, there has to be some sort of dynamic that's not explicitly stated here, where it would have been more effective, or better in somehow to let the Companions handle it. And let word get maybe it was about saving face. Who knows. Maybe it was a little bit more easy for the offending parties to hear it from the Companions than it was to hear directly from the prophesy side of himself. Who knows. But those things are always present lurking underneath the surface.

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The next Hadith 47

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Oh, this is a good one. Here we go.

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How's it going for the women's class? Let's do it.

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Well, I have them and it's really all the one who said the prophesy centum said, the one who suppresses his anger, and has the power to give effect to it mean like he's not just angry for and he's harmless. Like this is somebody who has the ability to harm, right.

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And that can mean lots of things that could mean that they are in a leadership position. Or they have the ability, maybe it's physical strength, maybe it's weaponry, who knows. It could be any sort of thing. They have the ability to punish people, physically or otherwise. Somebody who gets angry and they have the power to act on that anger, they will be called out by a law the exalted to the front of all the creatures on the Day of Resurrection. And that person will be given that their free choice of hood or the iron, right the versions of paradise to his liking. And this is in widowed and Timothy, okay, here we go.

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What on earth are the shoulder line? What are the damsels of paradise the virgins, right?

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And why is it? Why is it part of our tradition? Like are these literal? What's the point and then being virgins? Why is it something that a law stresses, right? We all like, I'd like to hear your thoughts about this because this is something that orientalists and Westerners in general seize upon because it makes them very uncomfortable. Right? It's like, Oh, my God, like this is the we knew it was true. Like the Muslim men are just rabid savages that are just, you know,

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violent and

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and they're only motivated by their base lusts right

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so it's a pretty big question let's say why are their Hodor lying?

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Why are there these wide eyed damsels in paradise? Isn't that unfair to women what a women get? Where's the wide eyed studs

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in paradise for for women

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I will not proceed until someone gives me their thoughts

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okay, I a law shows modesty

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for women

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because of the nature of men's jealousy

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so it was the implication that

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I think what you're saying is that to talk about female sexual desire is something that is violating the respect for women and modesty that Allah is found to Allah has of them or, and or, let's say, violating

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the jealousy of men. I didn't even think about it from that angle, but that's certainly true.

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I believe women do have almost same reward, but also women have other desires and men. Good. Okay. Very important point though. We're going to expand on that in a second. Women have other desires than men. Okay, good. Women have the same reward.

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Good. That's a very good default rule when we're talking about Islamic law. So then why are men specifically targeted here in the Hadith?

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Why doesn't Allah why didn't the prophesies Salam have a hadith about women controlling their anger, and thus being rewarded with something that's particular to women? Ah, number one, men are more prone to anger. That's true. And number two, number two is women suffer in other ways? Yeah. Yes. Oh, okay. So number two women suffer in other ways. Let's talk about also what are the consequences of, of anger in each case, then the prophesy centum say he qualified. This isn't just the person who suppresses their anger. There's a person who has the authority and ability to harm other people.

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And they are the one that controls their anger. Right? So it's not just like the prophesy centum is not talking about your run of the mill, I spilled the milk in the kitchen sort of anger, right? We're talking about somebody who, you know, can determine who lives and dies, right? Somebody who sends people to war, somebody who, you know, holds a gun, you know, something like that. Somebody who has the power and authority to injure harm people.

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Right? Yeah. Or can make their lives absolutely miserable, right through, let's say, I don't know, like, they control the purse strings, right? They're the head of the household. They are the person who who brings in the money, right? And if they were petty, they could punish everybody else. In accordance to their anger, no allowance for you know money for you know, food for you. Here. You think that you're you're tough stuff here, you can have this crust of bread, right for for dinner tonight and go to bed without without Right. Right, these sorts of

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types of punishments. So the Hadith specifically, is about somebody who has the authority to inflict harm,

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because of their anger. So, somebody who has that authority and yet paired with that authority shows restraint, then they are going to be rewarded in this very particular way and honored in this very particular way. And this is something that is inhabited by men. Right? The head of the household in the sense that the the absolute

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responsibility to

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secure livelihood, right? Food, shelter, clothing, that's the man's responsibility, full stop. If the woman wants to contribute, she is allowed, but that doesn't dangle anything over the head of the man at the end of the day, the man has to provide these things. Right if he doesn't, the Imam can separate

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You can dissolve the marriage if he doesn't take care of these basic necessities. Right. And so there's this person that there's this sort of asymmetry of power, I'll try to get back to that in a second.

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Which isn't necessarily bad.

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But there's a further level of responsibility

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for the person who has that power. And thus, there's a further level of reward for somebody who restrains themselves and restraints, restraints or anger within that context of having that authority and power. Right? This is very, very, very, very important when it comes to how does Islam understand the power? Very, very different

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from how contemporary liberal society understands power, contemporary liberal society, views power as evil,

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almost unequivocally evil, we have the saying in English power corrupts, right? That is not an Islamic orientation towards life and power. Right? The prophets of Allah, Allah, if Saddam had power, he was not simply an insurgent movements, yes, there was a time period of insurgency. There was a time period of being oppressed, but then

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he became the power, he became the head of state, he became the king or the president, whatever you want to say. And after he died, the next four or five companions, they were also righteous wielders of power.

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So we don't have this, this absolute like, oh, asymmetry of power, somebody is more powerful than somebody else. That absolutely means that there's oppression going on. No, no, no, no, no. But that person has a higher degree of responsibility. Yes, exactly. Within our religion, and that person is going to be dealt with more harshly in the afterlife, because of the power that they had. Somebody can wield it for good. We believe that power can be wielded for good, we believe in the possibility of good power. Right. And so this hadith is about good power. Somebody has power. And they are Clements they are forbearing. They are merciful, they control their anger, that person has an

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enormous reward.

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Why is that reward gendered? Because that role is also gendered? Right? This is the responsibility of men to take up these particular positions of authority and power. And it's also their responsibility to tame themselves obtain their anger, especially, we're talking about the anger that's on their own behalf. Right, so.

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So just the fact that there is asymmetrical power in a household in a society is not necessarily a bad thing. When it comes to our tradition.

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However, the side that has the power, whether it's a single man within his household, or the governor or the military, or whatever it is, absolutely. Has to use that power for good.

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Yes, very good. And that does not mean that women are being degraded, when that is the reward. And this gets back to your first point. Right? About male and female desire. Right? Right. Male and female desire is different, is different. Right? And without being absolutist, because one can always point out to what about this? And what about that, and there are exceptions here and there. Right. But um, let's just say that men have typically much, much higher * drives than women. And they are much, much more motivated sexually than women, they are typically sexually aggressors or pursuers. Right? And this is something that's, that's universal. It's something that's hormonal. In

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fact, they found, okay, if you really want to go off the deep end, okay, you can look into some of the first hand accounts of

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if you can stand to do so of women who undergo hormone therapy to try to transition to

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to become a man. Right? So basically, you have this person who had a certain hormonal makeup, and then they're messing with that and they are introducing levels of testosterone that are very, very foreign to them, their firsthand accounts of what it's like to have that much testosterone pumping through their body is very, very interesting. They basically, like were shocked and astonished by how much they more they wanted to pursue, right sexual activity and attraction and romance and etc, etc, etc. And I'll spare the gory details, but you get the point. Right. So these things are different. And somebody can say, somebody can say, well, you know, not everybody and you know, this

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a joke.

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realization, etc, etc. But there are even discrepancies internationally. Right? We have things in the United States in North America,

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such as the widespread dispersal of endocrine disruptors and other sorts of pharmaceuticals in our water that actually makes men have a lot less testosterone than other places in the world. Right? They did some sort of sampling of, of, of testosterone levels in men in North America versus men in Egypt, I think. And they found that men and other places where there weren't nearly as many pharmaceuticals and endocrine disrupters in the water, had much more higher levels of testosterone, right? So there's a chemical thing to this right later that critical untha, right, Allah subhanaw, taala, creative male, and he created female, He created them as two complementary parts, neither of

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them whole by themselves. And each of them has different motivations and different desires, right? When it comes to men, men tend to be way more motivated by this sort of romantic intrigue and attraction and etc, etc, etc. And that's not to say that women don't have that side of attraction to them. Of course they do. But it's not nearly pronounced as pronounced typically as it is for men. And women have other things that are stronger forces of attraction to them. Right? Has it's a stereotype, right? We have stereotypes like this within our culture within Media and sitcoms and comedy, right? A woman can not be intimate with her, she can't like if she's having an argument with

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her husband. Right. And she feels slighted in some sort of way, or undervalued or not listened to, then she literally cannot bring herself to have intimacy with her husband.

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Right, that's a fairly well established, observable facts and stereotype. However, the man on the other hand, it doesn't matter how bad of an argument they've had almost almost, it doesn't matter how big of an argument they've had, I guarantee you that the man if it comes down to being intimate is ready and willing to forgive and forget, in order to have intimacy. All right, this shows you something very, very telling about gender and sexuality, across gender difference that, you know, there's something much more maybe complicated or spread out when it comes to attraction.

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In women, then when it comes to attraction, or motivation in men, a lot is best. Right? These are all generalizations.

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Okay, we went far afield. Let's see, what else.

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Okay, we talked about that we talked about that.

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Yes, we talked about the consequences of male anger versus female anger, that the consequences of male anger might end up wreaking havoc on society and nations that might cause war, right? All these sorts of things that men tend to be in control of, or responsible for, as opposed to women. Oh, and the last part that was left untouched was the deconstructing what it means to

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to be rewarded with a virgin? Right? This is something that because Hold on, I mean, right is literally translated as like wide eyed damsels. But in the Quran, we do have like,

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a cattle, right, we made them into virgins, right. So we do have this thing that they are virgins, now, a Western person

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coming from a Western background, raise this sort of thing, and they're very, very disturbed, right, they think that this is just some sort of fetish, or some sort of, you know,

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whatever you want to say, like some sort of,

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it has to do with the experience of intimacy, and et cetera, et cetera. But there's something much more much more deep and profound going on here when I last spoke with the other promises virgins to the believing men in paradise. And that is, and honestly, like, perhaps nobody can appreciate it, except somebody that comes from a background outside of Islam, where you see that most non Muslims they have multiple intimate partners before they get married. Right. And so for a person who has had multiple intimate partners before they get married, there's always this kind of background uneasiness, right.

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People are always worried or anxious about being compared to people previously, right? Am I as good as them either in very kind of crude terms, like when it comes to intimacy and performance, or when it comes to other sorts of things like personality, like helping out etc. And the worst kind of scenario

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Because when when somebody gets into a fight, there will be couples that bring these things up, though IOI, I should have never left so and so like things were better with them and et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, right, so much more than a kind of a physical fetish. This is something that has to do with the tranquillity of the soul. Right? Keep in mind that paradise is free from worry. Free from anxiety, free from fear, right?

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What does the law say? So it's a law here he says,

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Last marijuana fee Halawa will attack thema Isla de la Solana Solana right, that there is nothing displeasing in paradise. Right. And it's a much more important than anything going on physically, to be concerned and worried about measuring up or stacking up to a previous relationship, or a previous partner or spouse, etc, etc, is one of the most unnerving things that a person can go through. And one of the most undermining things and one of the biggest sources of anxiety and kind of erosion of self confidence. Right. So one last final thought of promises. And this is even more important, perhaps for men who are, we really, really liked to be respected and liked to be kind of reassured

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that we're doing a good job, and it's very, very painful

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and hurtful for a man to think that he's not kind of like

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to feel unappreciated, or to be kind of cut down or compared to somebody else, and it's kind of a negative way. Right? So

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for this sort of situation,

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you know, it really represents psychological tranquillity. Right, that if, if somebody has never been with anybody else before, they've never been intimate or with in a relationship with anybody else before then this is a level of psychological tranquility that is unmatched. Right and so allows people to honor when he is promising virgins in paradise right, it has to do with this kind of erasure of the fear of being compared a ratio of the fear of being you know, belittled or being inadequate. Right and a loss bounds Allah knows best.

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Welcome Samira, you entered into a very very

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loaded fraught topics are talking about

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the whole line

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and what it signifies

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why they come.

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Anyone have any questions about that? Let's pause for questions before we go on any objections

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feminist readings that would rather

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erase the existence of the Hodor line

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this is an important point.

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A pistol logically

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right the difference between a slam every other religious tradition or textual tradition is that

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in a slam

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we decide or we have decided and Allah Spano Tala has shown us what is evidence and we follow the evidence to wherever it leads.

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Whereas previous communities that have gone before us such as Christianity and Judaism, etc, etc. There was always a point within their

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when within their religious history, that they decided on the conclusions and then they worked backwards to manipulate the evidence in order to prove those conclusions that they had already arrived to.

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There you go and since there is not the OG Masha Allah cut, men can have their Hadees I will take peace, reading a good book under a tree yesterday Mashallah. Everybody has their thing, right? Everybody has what is peace to them. And the general principles that are lost found to Allah is going to give the inhabitants of paradise what is most relaxing and what is most pleasing to them.

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It's actually a

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story from somebody, another Imam that I know where he worked in the inner city. Right? And you work in the inner city, you deal with all sorts of people, you know. And so he was, he heard someone in the mess she'd say, Man, I can't wait. When I get to Jana. I'm going to smoke crack.

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And the Imam was very taken aback and shocked and surprised and debated whether to say anything or not, and then decided against it because, okay, this person believes that, I mean, hey, there's hummus, right? There's alcohol that has been purified so that it doesn't have the negative effects of what it has in this life. So I guess it's not beyond rational possibility that Allah's fall to Allah could provide something in a purified way to the inhabitants agenda. Who are we to limit the bounty and mercy of Allah? subhanaw taala.

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Anyway, let's see where we were at. got five more minutes. Okay. Can we do one more?

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Okay, yeah, that's one short.

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Yes, number 48. Very short, the famous writer of Elohim said that a man came to the Prophet salallahu Alaihe salam for advice and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to him, let's talk about Do not get angry. Okay, the man not kind of taking this advice very seriously. It's like, Okay, what else what else? But the prophesy Saddam was not going to let him go that easily. He kept on repeating that talk about like, Do not get angry.

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00:36:46 --> 00:36:56

obviously, we're not given the entire full context of what's going on here. Because there had to be something that prophesy said I'm new about this person. And this is the

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mean that Hansel fatawa, right? The prophesy said, I'm dealt with people

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based off of their individual situations, and he knew their individual situations when it came to one man asking was he allowed to kiss his wife during fasting? He said, Yes, you can. And then somebody else came and asked the same question. He said, No, you can't, right. Because the first guy was an old man, he was past his prime. And the second guy was a young guy, and was you know, full of energy, et cetera, et cetera. So the prophesy said, I'm new people situation, and he knew something about this individual, that he really, really needed to hear that he had to struggle with his anger.

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And this teaches us something very, very important about the flexibility or the plasticity of our behaviors. Right? Many, many people in order to kind of escape accountability, they lean on these sorts of platitudes that we have in society. Right? That's just who I am. Oh, when I get angry, I curse. Right? And maybe you guys don't aren't aware of this. I'm not sure how much it happens in the Muslim community. But in the non Muslim community, this is very, very common. Right? That's just who I am. Yeah, I get I get a I'm short tempered. Right. I have a short fuse, oh, I have that Italian blood or that, you know, hot blood, etc, etc. And of course, that's not to say that these things are

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true. In as much as they represent your starting point. Right. Some people

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do have shorter tempers than others. Some people are more patient than others. But these things are weaponized and utilized as excuses for poor behavior, and used to escape accountability. Right? Islam is against making a sin or a sinful behavior and identity.

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fundamental point, Islam is against making sin or sinful behavior and identity. And this is obviously exactly what the homosexual homosexual community has done. Right? Well, that's just who I am. Right? We don't care. Islam, we don't care. That's who you think you are, you can change who you are. You're not, you're not. You didn't just come out unchangeable, right? If you take the majority of non Muslim men, they would love to have an affair with somebody, they would love to cheat on their wives or their spouses or their or their girlfriends or etc. Right? Is that just who they are? Right? Every single and this is what makes our modern era so fundamentally different from the errors

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that came before going across religious traditions is that in the pre modern world, every religious tradition taught that you are not the same thing as your desires. You go into Buddhist texts you go into

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Hindu texts, you go into Christian texts, you go into Jewish texts, you go into Muslim texts, you are not your desires, your desires are separate from you. And your work. Your habitus, your, as Aristotle said, In this world, is to struggle and work against your desires in order to create pathways of habit, that are virtuous. That's how you develop virtue by struggling against your, your urges and your impulses, right? It's only very, very, very recently, where people have attempted to avoid this project. And lazily kind of avoid all accountability by saying, whatever and this is from content, enlightenment, and, and after him, whatever desire I have, whatever thing that appears

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within myself, is who I am, fundamentally, and if I don't express that thing, and act on it, it is a fundamental oppression of myself. A bottling up you can basically you're at fault, like, I'm, I might be liable to commit suicide, and it'll be all your fault, right? Because you're the one who's repressed me and tried to repress my my internal urges, right? That's what we're told today. A very, very dangerous way of looking at things.

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That's right. Oh, of course, we become worse than animals. ismat we become worse than animals because the animals don't do anything but obey Allah. Right? Whereas us, we are literally making up

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platitudes, and philosophies and ideas and ideologies in order to justify our worst inclinations. And with the devil. And we've noticed how the devil works. There is no horizon.

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The goalposts keep moving desire, there's no end to human desire. Don't think that, you know, now people are men are marrying men and women are marrying women. And that's just the end of it. Never. There's always another frontier, there's always going to be something else. Because the devil that's how he works slowly, slowly, slowly by pushing, pushing, pushing desire and human desire knows no bounds. The Prophet SAW, he said, um, he said this himself, he said that if men were given a value of gold, he would want a second one. Right? There is absolutely no satisfaction, satisfaction.

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We think, and this is the Kantian kind of post enlightenment kind of mentality, that if we act on our urges and desires, we fulfill them and satisfy ourselves. No, no, no, that's not how desire works. Desire must be trained desire must be disciplined. And that's the only way to satisfy it. Right? Through the focusing and funneling of it into one legitimate, productive, and not the kind of undisciplined just, you know, splattering it all over the place, here and there and everywhere now. So this is one of the philosophically more fundamentally dangerous things that we have right now. And this hadith is a subtle, but tangential and powerful reminder against that, and Islam. It's not

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an excuse. Whatever you feel inside of you, it's not an excuse. That's not who you are. You are more than that. And you are also partly unrealized potential. Right. And so we don't just take how we are now as finished products. And as you know,

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right? We're complete selves, whole selves, and therefore it's sacred. And this is why I keep coming back to this point, and forgive me for repeating myself, but the idle, the idol of our time as the self. It's not the sticks and stones. It's not Jesus Christ. It's not, you know,

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Krishna or anything else. In the first world, whatever you want to call it, the developed world, the colonial world, whatever you want to call it. The, the idol is the self.

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We have turned the self into an idol. Everything that self feels is sacred. You can't question it. Right? I'm attracted to this. Who are you to question it? Are you a bigot? Are you trying to oppress me? Are you telling me that I don't deserve to experience the same satisfaction as somebody else? Just because my desires are different.

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The self was not sacred.

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That's what our tradition teaches is that the self has meant to be disciplined not to be put up as a golden calf and worshipped and imagine that everything that it comes up with is apt is like revelation that you can't touch it.

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And that's where we'll end for tonight.

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Does anybody have any questions? comments, concerns? Reflections.

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If that's all done, I hope all of you are having a wonderful eighth. May Allah accept your worship. And we will see you next time in sha Allah to Allah Salaam Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

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