Taleem al Quran 2012 – P15 143B Tafsir Bani Israil 23

Lesson number 143 Surah Surah number 23 to 39

Wakaba Rob Booker and your Lord has decreed what has he decreed? What has he decided? A letter will do that you do not worship? Who INLA a year who except him? Allah subhanaw taala has decided this for you. And he has decreed this upon you look at the word COBOL. What does Kadar mean to make a final judgment to make a final decree concerning something? So for example, if a judge decides that a particular person is guilty, and because of that reason they have to serve a particular number of hours and community service. When that's done, that's decided, does the person have any choice? No, in some cases, okay. You may appeal, but then in some cases, no appeal. Right? So although meaning

he has decided this himself, and he has not left this matter to you, he has made this judgment and He has commanded this to you, that you must not worship anyone but him. Why? Because if you do worship other than Allah, then what will your result be failure in this life and also in the next? And the fact is that there is no one worthy of worship, but Allah alone, because who alone created us? Allah, who alone gave us everything that we have Allah who is our Holic? Who is our Malik? Who is our Razzak provider, Allah alone. So what kadaga buka, a letter boo Illa, Yahoo. And the point that I made at the beginning of the ayah, that he has decided this, He has not left this matter up

to us. Because if he left this matter up to us that okay, you decide what you want to worship, who you want to worship, then what would happen?

What would happen to people, as we see, those who don't listen to Allah subhanaw taala, then what are the worshiping creation, just like themselves, or in fact creation that is weaker than them? And then what does this lead man to his own loss, his own failure, He is disappointed in this life and also in the next life. We're Bill Wiley, Dany and with the parents, meaning he has also decreed this upon you. He hasn't given you a choice with regards to this matter, that with both parents while today, and this includes mother as well as Father, what should you do? Santa? utmost good. He has decreed He has commanded that you must be good to both of your parents. Why? Because your parents

deserve your son. Your parents deserve good treatment. And even if you think that they do not deserve good treatment, then still treat them well. Why? Because Allah has told you to do Ersan to them. Simple, that's it. We don't need any other reason, any other explanation to convince us to be good towards our parents. This is enough of a reason that Allah azza wa jal has decided this for us, he has decreed this upon us that we must be good towards our parents. Now, remember, that someone who has done your son to you, someone who has been good to you, what do they deserve from you? Good in return? Right? If someone has treated us well, if someone has been generous with us, what do they

deserve, that we ignore them? That we become rude to them? What do they deserve, that we also are good to them in return? Think about any person in your life, any person whom you have dealt with whom you have lived with whom you have, you know, worked with in any capacity whom you have known. Out of all the people whom you know, whose favors are the most upon you, whose favors are the most upon you, your parents, how that they have brought you up, they have changed your diapers and wipes your nose countless times, right? Then they have spent so much money on you. They have prepared food for you and serve you. They have dealt with your crying and your tantrums and your begging and your

bad behavior. Right. And on top of that, they still continue to love you and show you their support. Yes, there may be points where you don't understand them and they don't understand you. But at least they have a room in their house where they say yeah, my dear, this is yours. You stay in my house. They don't just kick you out of their house just because you disagree with them. So parents their son upon us is

The greatest and this is the reason why in the Quran you will find many times the hook of Allah is mentioned with the Huck of the parents. Worship Allah alone and to parents do good. Because out of all people that we know that we deal with whose son upon us is the greatest. Our parents, obviously the prophets have a lot of enemies the Messenger of Allah. All right, that's a different situation. But I'm talking about relatives, people whom we meet people whom we deal with, than the parents or son is the greatest. So what Bill Wiley Dany siRNA, the question is, how is it that we do Ersan towards our parents, by obeying them, by listening to them, by serving them by helping them by doing

things that will make them happy, pleasing them? This is all different forms of Ersan. Once we learned that, a man came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and he asked a prophet, what do you command me to do? What do you command me to do? What should I do? The Prophet said, a lot isn't replied, be good towards your mother. The man asked the same question. What do you command me to do? What else should I do? The prophets of Allah Islam said, be good towards your mother. The man asked again and the Prophet sallallahu sallam said, be good towards your mother, the man asked again, and the Prophet sallallahu sallam said, be good towards your father. So both do good towards your

mother, and also do good towards who? Your father, both of them. We learned that our beloved armor he said that a man came to the Prophet sallallahu sallam, and he promised him that he will do hijra, the man said, the prophets of Allah said, I'm gonna do hijra,

and he had left his parents, okay? Meaning he came to the Prophet sallallahu set of children that he was going to do hijra, and this man had left his parents at home in tears, his parents were upset. The Prophet sallallahu sallam said to him, go back to them, and make them laugh as you made them weep. Go back to them and make them laugh as you made them cry. Your son towards your parents is what? To be good to them, and also to do things to say things that will make them happy, which means that making our parents upset and making our parents cry. Is that exam?

What is it? It's contrary to your son, it contradicts your son. And this is the reason why we learn that Ibn irmo blue earn who he said that Buka will validate mineral ruku P will cover if making your parents cry, making your parents so upset, so helpless and so weak and so disturbed that they begin to cry. This is a part of disobedience, and one of the major wrong actions. It's one of the major wrong actions making your parents cry, because Allah subhanaw taala tells us to do your son towards our parents. We're Bill Whalley Dany Sana.

Now, when parents are healthy, they have money, they have their independence, and they're on the giving end. It's kind of easy to do Ersan in the sense that they tell you to do something, you do it, how often are they going to ask you hardly, right? They're going to tell you to do something which is good for you. So you'll do it anyway.

But when parents become old, when parents become old, they become irritable. You don't understand them, and they don't understand you. They become weak they begin to expect from you. Then what Allah subhanaw taala says, ima if you're below Vana, they reach your indica near you, meaning in your life, while you are living with them while you are living close to them. In your presence. They reach what I'll keep an eye on the old age, if they become old in your presence in your life, who had the woman one of them, meaning either your mother or your father, Oklahoma or both of them mother and father, because sometimes it happens that a person he loses his mother or their father

when the mother was young or the father was young, but sometimes what happens that both of them reach old age and the children are with them. So if your parents reach old age when they are with you either one of them or both of them, then what's the instruction that Allah gives us in addition to your son, fella than do not the call you say Lahoma to them or fend off? Then do not even say off to them. Wallet and her humor

and do not scold them. Do not yell at them let and her humor, then what should you say to them? When you're angry when you're annoyed when you're frustrated? We'll call Lahoma and say to them, oh, learn a word that is Kadima, that is normal, that is respectful. Three things are mentioned over here.

That when parents reach old age, then what is it that a person should be careful about his language? What is it that he cannot say? Or don't even say off to them, neither your mother nor your father? Because sometimes it happens that you have a very good relationship with one parent. Let's say your mother and your father you don't get along with at all. So all the Your son is directed towards the mother and the father. What happens every time he walks in argument or it's the other way around? But what do we learn over here? Mother and father both deserve good treatment? You cannot say off to your mother, you cannot say off to your father.

Now, what is this off?

Off? In many languages? such as Arabic, even Urdu? I'm not sure about Somali or any other language, but in certain languages the word off what is it used for? To show? Contempt frustration? Like you're upset, like, oh, god sake Oh,

off literally, it is basically used for everything that is dirty and worthy of being disliked. Dirty and worthy of being disliked. So for example, dirt, which is under the nails. Have you ever seen kids hands, you know, when they come back from the park and their nails are like black literally. All right. And likewise, it's also used for a nail clipping. Okay, like, for example, somebody just chews off their nail and spits it on your desk. Okay, or on the carpet of the masjid. And you're sitting there and you see nail clippings, something very small, but disgusting, dirty, worthy of being disliked. Likewise, earwax. Like, for example, if you see a dirty Q tip,

somebody didn't toss it in the garbage, they just tossed it towards the garbage can. And then you find it on the floor.

And you're like, Why do I have to pick it up? So anyway, all of this is used for tough and is used for such dirty little disgusting things. You see all of these meanings? What do they tell us? Something very small. But something disgusting. So off is a small word. It's a very small word. It's a very small expression. Of what of disgust of anger, or frustration, of being upset. A small expression, but Allah subhanaw taala says Don't even say that. Don't even say Oh,

then can we say words that are bigger than this?

Can we hit in our frustration? Can we say words that are bigger than this off? How many letters is it? I live on fire? Okay, fires the shutdown. For the sake of argument, you can say it's three letters. But it still sounds right. Oh, oh.

What about words that are bigger than oh, what kind of words do we say to our parents when we are upset?

And when we are frustrated?

You don't say anything? Mashallah. Such good girls, you are?

Seriously, because the thing is that unless and until we identify these problematic words in our speech, we cannot leave them. We will continue to say them. So what are the words that we say to our parents when we are upset with them?

Don't talk to me.

Let me do what I want to It's my life.

I don't care. Oh.

And then we snap a lot as well. Yeah. So no, what's your problem?

Why? Don't ask me. Don't tell me.

I'm an adult. We snap. And sometimes it's not just the words. It's the style. It's the manner in which we respond to our parents in which we speak to them. My dear sisters, majority of you are very young and you have young mothers,

young mothers.

Think about parents who become old. You know why old age is mentioned over here. This is because when people become old, they can become very annoying.

They can.

Why? Because when a person becomes old, he becomes weak in his body.

suburb is very, very little

And then many people, they do not remain strong as they were before emotionally, spiritually also many times it happens that people their Eman goes down, mentally they become weak. So as a result they say things they will complain, they will you no object at what you do and what you wear what you say. And these things will be very, very annoying. So, think about it if we cannot have solid with our young parents, then what about parents that are old? Can we have supper with them?

Allah says, lad, the CO Lahoma offene, don't say off to them, while I turn her humor, and do not scold them than her humor. Now, what does not mean to scold someone?

Does this remind you of a word now, and half what are the rivers and in a river, what happens? The water is flowing, it's constantly going, going, going going. So now is basically to yell at someone and to scold them so bad, that they run away from you. That they run away from you that you say something so nasty to them, that they get hurt, and they go away. They just shut the door and they go away. They leave you alone and go mind their own business.

Allah says Latin her humor, don't say things to them, that will repel them that will cause them to go away from you. That will cause them to become afraid of you Latin her humor now is used for to scold someone severely and harshly Latin Houma, then what should you say?

If you can't say, oh, you cannot even yell at them. Then what should you say? Allah tells us what to say. We'll call Lahoma colon Karema. Say to them a word speech. That is Kareem, what is Kareem? Kareem. Elegant, respectful, dignified, decent, civilized, gracious, sacred words. Words that are good, kind, generous, respectful, how both in content as well as in style, in content and in style. What do I mean by that? That when you select words, when you are putting those sentences in your head, when you're saying something to that make sure that you use good and respectful words. And secondly, your manners should also be respectful.

Like for example, if your parents ask you to do something, one is to say, Okay, I'll do it. And the other is

okay, and rolling your eyes and sign and you know, showing that you're upset. This is something that does not befit a Morrison child will call Lahoma. Colon Kadima, say to them good kind words. Sorry, didn't say. He said about colon Karema, a respectful word that speak to them. Like a guilty servant speaks to his harsh master,

a guilty servant, someone who's done something wrong, and they're a servant. How will they speak to their boss?

Who's very harsh? How will they speak to them arrogantly rudely,

as if yelling at them? No, very, very respectfully, with a low voice in a humble way.

Using the words very, very carefully,

which I had said that when parents reach old age, do not feel irritation from them.

Meaning do not get agitated and annoyed by them by their presence. Like for example, sometimes it happens that a person, they go to the living room or the Finder, father sitting over there, like, oh, I want some time on my own, and my father is still in the living room. So it's just going to be so annoying. If I sit here he's going to ask me about things that he doesn't even know he doesn't even understand. And he's going to be asking me about my studies about my exams about my work. So I'd rather just go in my room and sit by myself feeling annoyed, feeling irritated.

Do not feel irritation from them. Why? Why? Because once you were little, and they looked after you, if I'm I'm a reporter from a political dilemma and one of the prophets on a lot of them said he is doomed he is doomed. He is doomed. Who the person whose parents one or both of them reach old age while he is alive and he does not enter paradise.

Being able to spend time with your

Parents whether your parents are young or old, in their old age is a great gift. It's a great opportunity, an opportunity for what entering Janna because when you're being good towards your parents, you know who you're pleasing. First and foremost, Allah subhanaw taala, your parents are your gate to Jannah, your door to Jannah. It's up to you, whether you use that door, or you leave it closed. It's up to you.

Because when you make your parents happy, who is it that you're making happy, in fact, Allah subhanaw taala.

Who is it that you're benefiting yourself?

Many times, it happens that we consider certain things to be wrong. And we're very particular about them and certain things to be good. And we're very particular about them. outside our house, or when we're interacting with other people, we're very careful about how we talk how we dress, how we disagree with people, but when it comes to dealing with our own parents, sometimes we forget that this is also something for which we are going to be rewarded for or punished for.

You know, once there was a man who joined the coverage, remember the whole adage I mentioned to you about them? And the Hawaiian image, they basically said that if a person commits a sin, then he has left Islam. All right. So this man, he was with the whole adage, and he repented. And he came to him and remodeled Lulo. And when he said that, even when I was a How did you I committed certain actions, which I consider to be very, very wrong. Are they actually wrong? Or is it just me? Because remember the coladas were very extremists. All right. So it was normal to ask him that, what did you do? What are those sins? He said, Oh, this and this, and this. And this. It removes said, these are

not sins. Let me tell you what sins are. And he listed them. And one of the actions that he mentioned was causing one's parents to cry through disobedience, meaning you disobey them so much that your parents cry.

Many times it happens that we think doing good, as you know, doing Dawa, and giving a lecture and holding a halacha and volunteering at an Islamic event. And you know, doing these big, big things. And since what are the big, big sins, but we don't realize that Allah subhanaw taala has given us the opportunity to do the best good deeds were in our very home with our own parents, and sometimes shaytaan. He makes us blind to the sins that we commit in our own home with sins against our parents through their ill treatment. Bad behavior with them rudeness towards them, these are sins.

These are sins. If normal, ask that man. Do you wish to separate yourself from the fire?

Do you wish to separate yourself from hellfire? That man said yes. He said, Do you wish to enter paradise? He said yes. By Allah. Yes, of course. I don't want to go to hellfire. I want to go to Jana. Even more said, Are your parents still alive? That man he said yes. My mother is it almost by Allah, if you speak gently to her, if you speak gently to her, and if you feed her, when you buy food for her, bring it to her, feed her, then you will enter Jannah

if you avoid major sins, serving your parents, treating them well, speaking to them nicely, is one of the paths to paradise.

But unfortunately, we neglect it. We don't give much importance to it. And sadly, we spend our time you know, in our conversations, talking bad about our parents, making fun of them with our friends, and sometimes saying extremely wrong things about them, making dua against them, cursing them, humiliating them in public. I mean, think about all these your mama jokes, what are they?

What are they

insulting someone's mother and insulting your own mother, aren't they?

But sadly, parents, their status is not acknowledged in our society anymore.

In fact, so many books, so many cartoons, what will you find that parents are portrayed as dumb? They don't know anything.

Right. So children from a very young age, they grew up with this understanding that yeah, my parents are crazy. My parents are strange.

But parents have a very high status in our religion. They deserve respect. We learned that

It is said that Allah curses anyone who sacrifices an animal to something other than Allah. Allah curses anyone who steals a landmark meaning something that serves as a landmark for people so that they can make their way they can find their way. And Allah curses anyone who curses his own parents,

the one who curses his own parents, what is he getting?

What is he getting? The Curse of Allah, Abdullah bin almost said a man's reviling his father is one of the major wrong actions in the sight of Allah,

cursing your parents, cursing them in the sense that saying bad words, do them either in front of them or behind them, saying curse words against the parents. And this is something that's quite common. Unfortunately, this is also one of the major sins according to the Companions, or the live in irmo has had the pleasure of Allah lies in the pleasure of the parents, and the anger of Allah lies in the anger of the parents.

So is it a serious matter? Keeping your parents happy? But do you ever feel that no matter what you do your parents don't get happy? Be honest with me, please tell me.

I remember recently I was in this gathering, and somebody was asking what how they should deal with their children. And you know, when their children Rebel, and they don't listen. And there was this young girl sitting over there. And she said that, what if it's the other way around? That no matter what you do, your parents are not pleased with you? Or they're always saying no, no, no. It's like they're constantly against you.

Do we find ourselves in these situations? Sometimes? Yeah, it happens.

It happens, that there's so much disagreement, there's so much miss understanding. Or there's so much you can say miscommunication, or such a big distance, such a big gap between parents and children, that you're trying to say something. And your parents understand it completely differently. You're trying to tell them about how good your day was, and they start raising their eyebrows on why did you say this? And why did you do this? You think you're dressed very appropriately. And as you're walking out, your mother is scanning you top to bottom.

You have books in your bag, and your mother has doubt that what do you have in your bag?

You're using your phone and you're calling somebody and your Father is asking you constantly? Who is it? Who is it? Who is it tell me.

It's like they don't trust you or they don't like you or they don't care about you. You want to sleep and they're telling you wake up. You want to go somewhere to stay home.

You like your group of friends. And they say I don't like that friend of yours. You don't want to study something and they tell you study this. You don't want to go to somebody's house and they drag you.

You don't want to wear something and they force you. Does it happen? Or am I talking about aliens?

Does this happen?

Almost every day, right?

So then what's the solution? What should we do?

Yes.

Because Allah subhanaw taala has told us to do SN.

You know why? Because it sounds when you are good towards someone, generally, generally, overall, then you know what happens? Their heart it softens for you, you enter their good books, you know that when you are good towards someone, then what happens, they become happy. And when they'll be happy, they'll agree with you. They will want to reward you.

So what happens is that when we you know, feel this rift, or this tension between ourselves and our parents, we pull away, we pull away. And what we do is, as soon as we come home, you know, leave your bag and then just go inside. In fact, don't even leave your bag outside. Just take it in your room. Don't eat dinner with them. I'm not hungry, and then go at nighttime, when everybody's sleeping. Right? Ignore them, ignore them, keep away from them, keep away from the we pull away when we don't get along with our parents. But that is not the solution. It is going to worsen the problems, it's going to make the situation much more worse. What should you do? If you do Ersan it's

not possible that your parents will not be good to you in return. I guarantee you. I guarantee you. If you do good, your parents are not crazy. They're not they will actually be good to you in return.

So just to sort of help make this idea more like concrete, you can think of it as an emotional bank account. So when you're doing good to your parents, you're making direct deposits into their bank account. So next time you make them upset if you've have good

deposits if you have like a good amount, they will be able to draw from there and they won't be as mad as you if you hadn't deposited there. Yes.

You know, just yesterday, something happened, okay. And me and my husband, both of us were very upset with my son. Okay. And in the evening, we're supposed to take him out somewhere. And we said, No, we're not going to take him out. We have to teach him. But then at the same time, we're like, no, he's been good overall. I mean, it's normal for five year olds to behave like this. It's okay. Yes, he behaved like this. But we don't think he's really a bad kid. It's normal for children this age to behave like this. So you know what happened? Even though he made us upset? We took him happy. Why? Because overall, he's been good. So you see, parents are like this. Yes, there will be times

when you disappoint them, when you make them angry. When you look at things differently, and they look at things differently. You are on completely different worlds, literally. But then what happens? Because you've been good, overall, you've been doing r-san, then what will happen? They will come to terms with you in sha Allah.

You know, I don't blame these girls. The atmosphere overall is like that. In the schools in the friends with peer pressures. I have a phrase daughter, she's very close to her mother. And when she calls her her mother calls herself and all the girls makes fun. Oh, you're not over your mama's baby still your mama's baby. So she feels shy Mommy, don't call them here. And I myself, my daughter was when she was 14, or 15. I went for to buy a cell phone for her. So this lady, she was Egyptian she was Asian background. So I was telling her that gave me that package only the basic way you don't have the internet. So she's your mango, your daughter is going to talk to your daughter. And she was

talking whispering to my daughter's that you couldn't get Wi Fi over free in the house. I said, What's this nonsense? I am buying for myself and sell for my daughter. And even more stupid is just that you are at your adult you are not going to listen to your parents. So they mentally prepare them under 18. You leave the house. I love you girls.

We love you too.

Overall, this is like I mentioned to you in books, in TV programs and movies. This is how it is. Parents are who? People from a different planet who don't know you and you don't know them who talk strange and that's all about them.

A father recently told me about his daughter. He said, It's like we have a paying guest in the house. A painter guess yeah, she just comes locks herself in the room. It's time for meal she comes out. She doesn't communicate with anybody. I mean, what do we do with that? And it's a person who knows the Dean very well who studied over here and she's done everything. But you know, when it comes to action, we all fail? What is it?

That's not a rhetorical question. What is

one of the basic definitions of your sign is that when somebody's bad to you do good to them, isn't it? So when parents yell at you, and they hurt you are the objective how you dress or the friends that you have? Then, where did your son go? What is your son over there? They said something to hurt you. But you do good in return.

So like, I personally experienced like entering my parents good books. For a long time. I felt like they didn't trust me. And it was like a lot of like I was rebelling, why why why especially against my mom. But then I decided, you know, like in Islam were told to be good to our parents. I just decided one day consciously that fine, I'll listen to them. And like I just earned their trust. And then after that you enjoy the benefits forever. Because they see that you're mature and they trust you and they trust your decisions. If you want to go out somewhere, they'll ask you a few questions. But at the end, they know you're wise, and they know you're sincere to yourself first and then to

them. So you earned it. Two types of people are such who want the best for you

so much or that they want you to become better than them. They'll never tell you something that is bad for you. They will always always wish well for you. They're sincere to you and you know who they are parents and teachers,

parents and teachers. They are the most sincere sincere people to us. So don't consider your parents to be your enemy. I mean, for God's sake, they're spending money on you.

Which enemy tell me which enemy in the world would spend money on you. take you shopping and buy you clothes. Oh

Salam Alaikum, I remember from an earlier lesson, we were commanded to keep ties with our close relatives. And you mentioned that it's an order because Allah knows that it's hard for us. So I thought similarly here, Allah knows that it's hard to be humble, especially when they're criticizing you or, you know, judging you. He knows that it's hard that and that's why the reward for it is so great because it's hard for us. Exactly. It's very hard.

I just had a quick question. So when it refers to parents is first, like referring directly to your parents or like, maybe your grandparents or like in laws, in particular, obviously, in the IRA, Wiley Dane is mentioned and Wiley, they do well, okay, which means to parents, meaning mother and father. But by extension, of course, it includes grandparents and it also includes in laws, I mean, respecting them and treating them well and saying good words to them. This is all part of their health. And, you know, a lot of the times we have a negative attitude, because we don't know, you know, what they deserve and all that kind of know what they've done for us. They're just parents

like we expect them to do that. And the other day, I was listening to an Amana Nihon from the story night, and he said something really outstanding and I could never think of that myself. And he said that Allah has not given you anything, he does not care. He has not favored you at all. Allah has in fact favored your parents. Through them, he has favored you. So he has given it to your parents, and through your parents. He made them the means to provide you food every day, to provide you education, to provide you money to live in this life, to provide your good health and all that. So in fact, he has not favored you. He's favored your parent he has not favored you directly. Right but

he has favored you through your parents recitation Well

neither

that can keep.

Karima