Arafah and the Muslim Family #08

Love, love,

love, love, love. Love

Rahman r Rahim al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil aalameen or salat wa salam ala rasulillah who are early or sahbihi Marine we begin In the name of Allah subhanho wa Taala seeking His blessings, we praise Him and we praise our beloved Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and request from Allah blessings and salutations upon him to my brothers and sisters in Islam salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. May Allah Peace, blessings and safety be upon you all. And I welcome you all to episode number eight of our short series together dedicated to the hedge and the family, common foundations, I pray that your first 10 days of the hedger are going phenomenally well Subhan Allah, we are almost at the end,

and actions are judged by their endings. So this means that we need to really bring ourselves together in an even greater capacity and do everything in our capacity to worship Allah subhanho wa Taala. To the best of our abilities, let's not forget the importance of the ninth of the ledger on the day of arafah. And how unique that day is with Allah subhanho wa Taala. And how many blessings Allah has showered not only the head judge, but even the neighborhood judge those who are not performing the pilgrimage, in terms of rewards in terms of forgiveness, in terms of freedom from the Hellfire, in terms of the opportunity to make dua to Allah subhanho wa Taala and have the two eyes

accepted and speaking about the day of alpha. This is the topic for today, I want to discuss with you all the reality of alpha and draw a parallel regarding this reality to

the Muslim family, the Muslim family as per the teachings and Tao of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam. And that's what we have been doing in our series together. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, I'll head you out of Subhan Allah, that there's nothing about the Hajj, except out of everything about it is out of and scholars have deduce from this, that you can

you can catch up with regards to the hedge. Except with regards to

if you miss out if

there's no hedge. Right? So Pamela, that's how important out of is. And in her in the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam, releasing to us this lesson, he's taught us how out of is the core of the fifth pillar of Islam, the hedge. And if we think about this, in this way, the idea of the core of something and we zoom into what the family should be, and the core what the core of a family is, as taught to us by Allah subhanho wa Taala Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wa sallam to make us understand really, that which we shouldn't allow to be sacrificed in any capacity. And if it is, then we lose the coin, we end up putting ourselves in a very difficult situation where we might just

lose everything, right? You miss our offer, you lose the edge, you lose the core of what is a marriage, you might just lose everything. And when we look at the core for marriage, Allah tells us in the Quran, when he tells us how a marriage is a sign from his science, he says what you're either being a commodity that between the husband and wife, Allah has put Masada and Rama, love and mercy, right. Love is the human emotion towards each other. And mercy. Some of the scholars have to say mercy here refers to the children of the of the marriage, and they are a mercy for the parents when those children are raised. Well Why? Because Allah says one levina M and whatever to Maria to be a

man and how can I be sorry at home? Oh, my Alison. I mean, I met him insha Allah subhanho wa Taala tells us that from the blessings of having a child or having children is that those children can be a means of gaining a greater place in the in paradise. Why? Because in paradise if the children at a higher level of Paradise because of the servitude and righteousness and piety, and the parents at a lower level in the in Paradise, Allah will raise the parents to the state to the level of the children, so that together they can be a family in general as they were a family seeking the pleasure of Allah in the life of the swopped Subhana Allah, this is the core love and mercy. And

some scholars have said that sometimes or we can benefit from this that sometimes the love meter fluctuates, and it experiences a recession, right, the rate of love crashes. So when that happens, you don't forget that Allah has placed mercy between you and your spouse, that you might not love her so much. She might not love you so much for a matter or a particular series of matters. But don't forget, that between you two is messy as well from Allah, but you have to make manifest that mercy. You have to show it you have to come across in a way that shows that the mercy is there proving that the mercy is right. And knowing that Allah has placed it between you because Allah said

in the Quran that he has placed between the married couple love and mercy. Now brothers and sisters in Islam

When you go to alpha, you have to stand meaning when we say stand women position yourself on alpha, right? You make yourself manifest that you are there. You can't be there digitally, right? In this day and age, you can't send a mobile phone there and ask someone to call you and Okay, I'm gonna edify you will have to physically be there in the moment. When people think when they say the okuhara, you have to stand for the period. No, you can sit you can lay down, Wyckoff means positioning yourself being present on the plains of arafa, you have to bring yourself to the moment. Let's take that parallel into the marriage. When we talk about marriage, brothers and sisters in

Islam, you have to manifest the love that you have for the other, you have to manifest the mercy that exists between yourself and the other, to the other, the other person must feel your mercy, right. It's not about just talking about the mercy being there. Or talking about the love being then we see this sometimes when there's turbulence between husband and wife, and, you know, the arbitration or the the counseling session takes place. And when you listen to the wife speak, the husband finds it very strange in terms of what she's saying, and vice versa. And they both say, but we are I do love her. And she says, I do love him. what's lacking or lacking is, you've kept it

hidden. You haven't positioned that love and mercy in the marriage, you haven't shown it, it's one thing to have it, it's another thing to say it. And when they say to each other, it's like the first time the husband hears the wife and the wife hears the husband. But above and beyond saying it you have to make you have to make it manifest, it has to resonate in our actions towards each other and different couples. experience love and mercy in different ways. Sometimes, it's in in the way a wife cooks for her husband, sometimes it's in the way the husband overlooks the faults of the wife or in the way the husband praises

the efforts of his wife or in some time, sometimes how the husband just feels sensitive to her situation in the sense that he sees her working hard and he says to I just him saying it, him saying that's panela malice panatela reward you for that you do the house is clean the children are you know, reasonable Milla. Bless you honestly, Allah has really made you a means for me just that Subhan Allah, is you manifesting that love and mercy. But if you keep it hidden, you know it in your heart, you feel it in your mind, but you don't ever say it. How is she supposed to know? Same thing with regards to my dear sister to you, with regards to your husband, you have all these emotions

towards your husband. But if he hasn't been nurtured in a way to be compatible with you in terms of being on your wavelength to understand that you cooking for him is you manifesting love, are you doing this for him is you manifesting love, then discussion has to at least happen within the couple where he understands where you coming from when you do what you do, doesn't have to be direct, it could be indirect, you could give an example of how your mother used to manifest love and make him think it's a hammer when she's doing it for me. She's showing me that she loves me for example, the point is brothers and sisters in Islam. arafa is about manifestation and the pilgrim placing himself

or herself there and then worshiping Allah to the best of his or her ability. The same thing with the marriage, a husband and wife need to position themselves in the marriage, they need to bring themselves to the table, they need to position themselves there. And then worshiping Allah subhanho wa Taala as a wife, as a husband, as a parent, to the best of his to to you know the

to your ability is dependent on your position in the family. And you will see Subhanallah how stronger the family unit will be and how amazing children you will raise and how Subhanallah

you know fluid, the relationship will be at the top of the marriage between the husband and the wife. So take take this into consideration especially now that we

we are for some people approaching the ninth of the ledger for some people we are experiencing the length of the ledger worship Allah through pondering over what I've said, and thinking about how you can be a better husband and a better wife in your marriage. Remember spanaway to Allah bless us with the best marriages. I mean, I love you And for the sake of Allah until next time, Salaam Alaikum alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

Allah, Allah Akbar Allah