Rights of Parents in Islam
Channel: Reda Bedeir
File Size: 50.78MB
Salam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh
No, this is not Mosley this Hello. We need Salaam here. Salaam in the sense of peace and Salaam of returning my greetings Allah as salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.
I shall show me the love there but
Oh, it's working in Kampala. Okay. Can you help everybody who is like scared of me to come close to show me the love?
Yeah, come close inshallah.
Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam ala rasulillah some of Allahu alayhi wa sallam. Let's try this again. Salalah one more time.
Allahu wa salam, ala alihi wa sahbihi wa Manuela
we're still continuing the sales of the oil. So but
I think this is too long.
And then I was asked today to
I was asked today to repeat
topic that I talked about in the football
so I was asked by so many people so we if you don't mind inshallah, we're going to share this together, at least after we finished inshallah going to open the floor for q&a. Because on the member, I have to be serious and there is no room for you to talk to me. But now you can you know, you can talk back you can attack me You can say you're Mashallah giving the parents so many rights and we have no rights so we can talk to each other inshallah.
if you look into the Quran, you will find that Allah subhanho wa Taala
the importance of regard, gratitude,
and being beautiful, and being grateful to our parents.
And ally mentioned this 13 times in the Koran,
but the central theme of very loyally they can be found in social Esra so number 17. I am 23 through 25.
What Allah subhanho wa Taala says, I'm going to recite the ad and we're going to go and break them down and benefit from them inshallah, and this lecture is meant to be talking about validation, so young generation, don't be offended or don't think that I'm attacking you. I'm just talking about the rights of the parents.
inshallah, and another round
we're gonna be talking about the rights of the children.
Okay. So in this ayah Allah subhanho wa Taala says, by the hour the Billahi min ash shaytani r rajim.
Mama, Mama, Mama,
Jana Dooley Mina
Okay, so Allah subhana wa tada starts
in Surah, number 17 and number 23
by saying we're called our buka Allah tabuteau inlay
Kadar buka. It means Allah subhana wa Taala
decreed. But let me just go a little with the ayah
means you rob has decreed. Rob means master.
I know some people always translated as Lord.
But I don't translate it as Lord because it has a human connotation. There is a House of Lords in the UK
and they are human beings. So can I use a word that that's being used for humans?
But even though the word master can be used in slavery, but yet there is a big difference between Allah subhanaw taala being the master and a human being a human being being a master.
So your master has decreed Allah tabuteau La Jolla is that you should not again enslave yourself many people will translate this you should not worship
but I'm going to explain the difference between worship and enslave
Allah tabuteau illa yeah should not enslave yourself to anyone other than Allah subhanaw taala
otherwise this is sure. So basically the ayah or this part of that is talking about the heat, which is the essence of his Deen the purpose for which you're created. Allah summarize this in one if the purpose of our creation in South is there yet. So number 51. And number 56, Allah subhanaw taala says wanna holla
I have not created the jinn and mankind except for one thing to enslave themselves to me.
So we need to understand first before we move into talking about invalidating this concept, why do we use
the word master and why do I use the word enslave?
Because in Surat Al Fatiha
Allah subhanho wa Taala introduced himself to us by saying at the very beginning, Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil aalameen. He didn't say
what Allah said like that way.
Because as if Allah subhanaw taala wants to tell us before we came into existence, Allah was being Mahmoud Hamed was there for Allah subhanho wa Taala.
Before we came to existence, Allah doesn't need it.
We need it.
So, after we all leave this dunya because Allah made a decree also in Surah 55.
And number 27, Allah subhanaw taala says,
every living being on earth will come to an end.
And there will be no existence for any creation. But Allah subhanaw taala will always be there. So before we came along, was dead, and after we go on was there. So Allah doesn't need our hand. It doesn't add anything to his kingdom, even once we die, he doesn't need it. So he said, I'll hand is there before you came, and Hamden will be there, even after you go this way? I didn't say mother in law, because if you don't, it doesn't make a difference with a law, you will benefit to me to Alhamdulillah
hamdulillah why not Alhamdulillah Rama, one of the
one of the hamdulillah Shafi
because we need to be thankful to Allah and we need to praise him over time. For what, for what? Because he's given us everything.
He's given us everything.
So it needs from you and me to go to different blessings of Allah and thank him for them. So for example, for the blessing of a Sahaba for health, we say Alhamdulillah Shafi
they have some knowledge CSRS Alhamdulillah Allah
The one who gives me knowledge. They have some hikmah some wisdom Alhamdulillah Hakeem.
Right? And you go on and on, do you have some power, some energy Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah deal. And you name it, you're going to use the mind to my names of Allah to go to
the one minute easy for us. He summed it all in Alhamdulillah. So reciting, it means lillahi, Ali Al Hakim Rosa Shafi.
And you name it.
And then the first moment Allah wanted to introduce himself to us, what did he say? He said, Alhamdulillah. Hey, listen, from the beginning, I'm telling you.
I'm the master, and you're the slave. Let's be clear from the beginning. Your job here is that you need me, you can do nothing without me.
So the first
quality of Allah the first name of Allah to be introduced to us, Islam. So from the very beginning, you draw the line, you're a slave, and I'm the master. And
I'm the master or the slave.
And not only you come to LA,
and muslimeen. Hello, horrible moment in. What will Allah mean?
He didn't show up with him. Because if you go to the lame English translation, what does it say? The Lord of the world's?
Words means our island.
But I mean, means
ethnicities, civilizations, cultures, languages. It's everyone.
It's more genetic than allow Ireland. Because people say like, oh, the world is this world. And the second one, no.
And then, after he said, I'm the master. Some of you might be scared, because it will come to our mind right away the slavery and how bad it was, because it was between humans. So Allah subhanaw taala said, Hold on.
I'm not like the Masters in the dunya. The human beings like you, who used to beat you. Work you day and night. And be oppressive to you, and they own you. And you work and everything goes to them. No, he said, Listen, I am
I'm not like any master. I'm the exceedingly merciful
on the unlimited the merciful. I'm the immediately merciful when you need me. I'm there for you. When everyone shuts their doors, my door is open. 24 seven comeback. I'll accept you.
As a blood vessel, the Allahumma said, or ramen ramen? dunya Rahim. Allah. So Rahim is specific, because it's permanent? And is it going to be for the people in general, will make us all and shall I say, I mean,
ramen is for everyone in this dunya.
But then some people might take advantage of that drama. And they will say, so I can do whatever I want. Because I'll always forgive me. So it's like, you weren't just like, Listen, don't take advantage of My Mercy. Because I am malakian with D. everything you're doing this life. I'm keeping an account of it. There's a record of it. There are two angels here. They're writing down everything. So don't take advantage of My Mercy. Because you will be brought to account and I am in charge of that day. It's called yo a dean. What is it called?
Was Yama de you know, if you ask an Arab what's a dean is gonna tell you religion. That's the literal translation, right? No, yo, Medina here means the Day of Judgment. But you know, what do I call it? I call it the payday. Can you repeat that?
The payday. You're caught in this life, and you're gonna get paid that day? How do you feel on the pay day? Man, I look at my fat chick and I like it. That's what you need to, you know, expect them the Day of Judgment. Would you have a fat check of good deeds? Or would you have the other one?
So this is the day when you're going to be you're going to get paid according to what you have done in this life. Is that clear? Yes, sir. Yes. Okay. Then I have been doing all this introduction to come to the coming
because this is all about praising Allah introduced
A lot of us, then he said this middle. This is the contract.
If you know who Allah is, and you know that they'll have this do to him, because he's Rahmani Raheem, and there's a pay that you get ready for that day. Are you ready to sign the contract CSRS? Er,
yo Ma, I'm ready to sign the contract. I am here signing on the slave and you're the master. He cannot get you alone. We enslave ourselves to where you can stay in. And you alone we seek for help. The last matter say what type of help he lifted open. Why? Because all of us have different needs. Am I right? All right. Hello. Slam wake up. Eat lots of vodka tonight.
Okay, so Allah subhanaw taala is telling us that, be careful.
You will need me all the time.
And the help that you seek is different. Some of you are in a financial situation. So you need money. So I left it open. Some of you are sick, you need health. So that's the habit you need. Some of you need love. Some of you need mercy. Some of you need compassion. So it's different needs. Right? And Allah gives you the need that you want. It comes at the right time at the right place. Right? Maybe one of your friends might give you the wrong help. Imagine you're driving and Mashallah, you're one of those young people drivers who drive at 180 Mashallah, this is the minimum that they go into drive. And they end up on a cliff. Right? And they look like they're out of the
car and like they're hanging and they about to fall from a mountain. And they say hell.
And then a brother goes by I say, Can I get you a milkshake?
Would you like French Vanilla?
Would you like double, double or triple triple? Is that the is this the type of health he needs? Man, he needs you to save them. Right? Somebody in the classroom in the exam, and they're writing and Subhanallah they you know, they're writing the exam. And they couldn't find a pen. You said brother, can you help me? Yeah, I have good candy for you here. Here's the candy. Like I don't eat candy when I hit the pen.
You see the right time? The help in the right time. So I said why? Yeah, can Stein he left it open. But now let me go back to the economic Why do I prefer to use the verb enslave not worship?
Because worship is something temporary? worship is something temporary. What does that mean?
how many times do we pray every day?
Okay, well yelling at me, man. I can hear you. He said five. Right. Okay, and how many meals Do you eat every day?
So I see you have different fatwas here. Depending on the culture somebody said for some of us it's 14
is honest. Because we eat three main like three main meals. But Mashallah nine snacks in between. Every time you visit the kitchen, you stop at the fridge, do something and come back like no
I didn't do anything in the kitchen. I can tell because you're putting weight Mashallah just coming from shaitan
I don't mean you don't cry. Okay.
So, somebody promised me water. Okay.
When I say worship, it takes a specific time we said How many times do you pray every day? Five times right? Okay, how much time does each server take
five to 10 minutes or Mashallah, so he's talking about the expressway and the normal way
and then we can talk about the whole show away, right? They express a lie is like four seconds long.
The issue is over what is Darshan shallow? Okay, this is the express a lot, right?
So let's say 10 minutes, right? 10 minutes, five times. How much time is that? 15 minutes is even one hour. How many hours is that like give you every day. 24 hours.
But the rest of the time. Are you in a better?
You said I'm saying, because the word better to you and me. The first thing that pops in your mind is rituals.
Hello, America right? rituals, Salas Yamanaka had, right. So I just gave you an example of salaat 15 minutes every day, not even one hour. What about
24? Seven, it's one month in the year. So again, it's temporary. Am I right? Right?
Okay, how much? How many times? Do you have gelato? Mashallah, three, four times a year or?
No, you don't limit it once in a once in a year. I do it once in a row.
Okay, so at least it's like once. It's once a year, right?
question is How long does it take?
Right? Maximum two weeks, three weeks. In fact, if you do Hajj the expressway, you can go today and finish with the second day of the street. So like ninth 10th 11th 12th four days?
Yeah, this is the Express package, like the Express salon. Right. Now the question is, what about the rest of the year?
You see what I'm saying? So let me ask you a question. When you eat, do you need Allah?
How many of us when we have cold or flu? Do you enjoy the food?
How does it taste? Even the things that are sweet? They taste sour, right? So Paula, Isn't this amazing?
Now question is, when you sleep, do you need a law?
How many people have sleepless nights?
Because they're worried about something? They have an exam? Or they have somebody who's missing or whatever reason right?
Mm hmm. When you're sick Do you need Allah?
So we are in a constant state of need of Allah. So we are slaves to him every single second of our life.
Is that clear?
So Ava doesn't mean rituals. That's why when you say Ayaka but don't say worship.
Is that clear? Why because a Tamia Rahim Allah give a very, very nice definition of the word that
he said it's an all inclusive term of everything you say? Or do whether it is internal, the NEA or external. to please Allah.
And amazing thing, the topic of tonight is being
and beautiful, and
respectful to my parents. Is it a better?
Hello, it's the second most beloved a better after the rate.
Law, what's a logbook?
This guy that we just shared.
After talking about monotheism, you know, slavery to Allah. What did he say? What is
your Allah? Is this something important? Yeah. Do you know that the process alum said, Rob fildo. Valid?
Yeah, of law. Allah will be pleased with you. If your parents are pleased with you, and Allah will be displeased with you. If your parents are displeased with you.
When a man came to the Prophet
my mic is working but you're not functioning. Instead again. When a man came to the Prophet
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and he said prophet of Allah. My father takes from my money.
La ilaha illa Allah, you're complaining that your father takes from your money who made you a man
who raised you to have a job to have money?
What did the apostle him say?
Kiss Bobby. He said, unto a man who can be you and your money belong to your father, not only your money he will do.
How dare you say this? This is total denial and ingratitude.
Man came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi Salaam to subscribe his name to join the battle.
And then the prophet SAW Selim said, Are your parents alive?
He said, Yes. He said, Go and take care of them. This is your jihad.
So you can even go for Jad, without the permission of your parents, if they need you, this is your jihad.
And the Muslim was answering another one who came to me said prophet of Allah, I want to subscribe my name, I want to come and join the battle. He said is your further life. He said, No. He said, Is your mother life? He said, Yes. He said, In the film, half in agenda Takata may go and take care of your mother, because gender is under the feet of your mother.
How do we treat our parents today?
How do we deal with them?
Can you imagine Jenna is under the feet of your mother. So your parents are up to Jenna? How many of us use them? And how many of us abused them?
Do you know? If your father sleeps? And he's mad at you? What will happen to you?
Do you know?
And you will see in that that I'm going to share with you because some of you will say Oh, he was never there for me. And we are in this modern culture. We just follow reciprocal you know mentality. You do good for me. I do good for you. You don't good for me, I'm gonna send you to the nursing home. That's what he deserved. You're old now.
So Allah subhanaw taala after talking about the best thing, and the purpose of your life is to be a slave to Allah will cover buka Allah tabuteau Allah. Yeah. And you stay away from shirk, from us trading partners. A lot of you said when you were early, they asked
what does that mean?
He said when it comes to your windy day in
they deserve nothing short of your best conduct. nothing short of your best when it comes to the way you treat them.
a while again, it's dual, we call it muthana.
Okay, it means your parents, which is basically your father and your mother.
And when the Quran talks about the father and the mother he uses forwards,
To masculine and to feminine in the singular. While it that's father up at some other function.
And he uses Wiley there, that's the female. And then oh, which is mother.
Now what's the difference between the four. So while it stems from while
and comes from it once
and the present tense is jelly, jelly, it means to give birth to.
a derivative of that is the word wallet which means newborn.
Some Arabs always say well, it means boy.
No one is genderless.
When I say that means boy which is a son, when I say Edna, which means daughter.
Is that clear?
So Allah subhanaw taala says while it singular, masculine, while either singular or feminine, it means the one who was the reason for your birth.
While and why did
until you are born, then there is a new job for both of them. Then the word
an omen starts functioning. Nobody could be a father without a born child.
So once the child comes, you become a father.
Once the child is born, you become a mother.
Is that clear? But the law uses in this ayah he said what Bill while he
does not say what Bill Abby will only he could have said that. So what's the deep meaning behind using alcohol? As if Allah saying
the fact that this man is
Your physical, biological father, he was the reason for your birth. And the fact that this woman was the reason for your birth and she is your physical, biological mother, they deserve.
They deserve the best of your conduct when you treat them.
Even before I come to this dunya and they start taking care of me, yes.
And why am I saying this because suppose Allah in another ayah, Allah subhanaw taala says, what was insane I be wildly the hammer at home.
Allah subhanaw taala said we are commanded man to take care of, again, while
the two are the reason for his birth, the father and the mother.
But then when he referred to the mother, he did not say how not to worry that
he didn't use the word the word which is the biological mother, he used the word Omo, which is part of the job that comes after that. Why? Because your mother contributed
to not only your birth, because once she starts caring you, that's the beginning. And then she delivers you. And then she starts taking care of you. And she starts like cleaning you clothing you, you know, feeding you.
This is what Allah Allah didn't say, Hamlet, who wanted to visit Hamlet, whoo, hoo hoo. So by the same token, if we think about this, the fact that Allah subhana wa Taala said, Bill Wiley daily acts as if he's saying, if your mother contributed.
And this is what Allah used,
but your father has not contributed
is just violent, because you need to be born first. Then he will work hard to take you to school and provide for all of your needs. This is when the word up starts functioning.
As if a Lessing if the only relationship between you and your parents is the fact that they are physical, biological father and mother, they deserve so what about after that when you come to this dunya and they take care of you from A to Z until you become a man and you start yelling at them. And you start talking back
and you start disrespecting them.
What will be the end?
Then Allah subhanho wa Taala. After that, he said in a blue one in the calchamber.
Time goes by,
and you grow up, and you become a young man. And your parents become old people when they reach old age, and he said in, in my blowin in Dhaka, it means now they are your house, after you were in their house. Now they are in your house. You're hosting them.
And a lot of the old age, why did the last panel talk about old age? Because at that age, we have high expectations.
You know, your parents when you're young, they don't have high expectations from you.
You know, when you were like a baby, and used to spill water everywhere, used to cause a mess everywhere, even the way you eat the way you play.
They will say just he's a kid. What can we do? They didn't go, right. But you grow a little bit older. What do they say? Hey, stop creating that mess. Clean your place. You grow much older stuff, you know, you go and buy the water yourself. Don't spill those of you go and buy the water. Right?
By the same token Subhanallah when your parents become old, what happens?
Allah Subhana Allah said, woman No, I'm Mira hoonah kiss fulfill.
Whoever we let live till old age, we we reverse them in creation, meaning Subhan Allah, Allah said before this ayah who allowed the hell Hawkman buff. Allah created you and you were weak. When you were a baby, you are completely dependent on your parents right? from A to Z. They clean you they clothed you they feed you everything.
And this is how you were created. So Magellan bada bing bada boom often cool. And then after that you reach youth young age, you become powerful
to Magellan bided by the Delica.
Magellan by the port
so after that vigor after the power, when you are a young man,
you start declining, and you become weak again. Not only that, and he said and white air,
So you start weak, and you end up weak and in between you become powerful, right. So when people come to old age, what happens to them, they become weak again. And in fact, in psychology, they said, their expectations also a very high, you know why, because they have given you everything, and now they're expecting something back,
they feel that they are entitled to some respect and to some authority over you. And rightly so, they deserve that. Right. They have done everything for you, they have sacrificed everything for you.
So they deserve some respect.
So what happens at that point, Allah said, At that age, at the old age, they start getting mad at you for trivial reasons. They become emotionally fragile.
They get mad at very trivial things. If you say something that might mean 99%, something positive, they will take it the only one negative way, the same way you used to act when you're a child, you don't mean anything good. You want to put me down, they think the same way.
If you say something to your kid, can't you control your hands while you spill the tea, because he spilled the tea in the morning, he feels like you're talking about him in Berkeley, is going to start crying.
And some people do so to their parents, they start yelling at them. What's wrong with you becoming a child again, you can even feed yourself. You can hold the cup of tea.
You know what we're gonna send you to the nursing home, we can put up with this. And Subhanallah if you remember, back in the days, when you were a baby, they were cleaning you
to understand what does that mean? clothing you feeding you taking care of you from A to Z.
But you didn't say that.
So when your parents become mad at you, what do you do? They deserve the best Alice Madison. Santa means. If you are patient, they deserved the best patience from you. If you are courteous, like look at you outside, you're smiling, and you're nice with people. So if you are courteous, they deserve the you know the best courtesy from you.
So they deserve nothing but the best from you.
So when they yell at you, when they are mad at you, how do you react?
You should be reacting
in a nice way. And you should accept the fact that
why do you do this? And are you doing them a favor? No, you're not doing them a favor.
You do this? Because Allah subhanaw taala commanded you by saying we're bill while Santa that's number one.
shiodome This has some sort of Abaddon.
You're a Muslim, right? Hello. What's the meaning of a Muslim? Someone who submits to
Allah. And if Allah said to me, why the daily aksana they deserve the best of you. This is the time when you exercise the utmost and best patience.
the emotional, the mental, even the physical harm that they might be doing, you can never
be outweighed by the favor and all the things that they have done for you when you were young. So you have to remember this.
When a man was an homage and he came to the prophets of Allah and Islam is a prophet of Allah. I have been cutting my mother all during the Hajj. Do you think I have paid her back?
And the professor Lam said not even one single second
of the agony and pain of labor when she was delivering you.
Can you imagine?
will lie if we spend the rest of our life doing good to our parents will never pay them off.
We can never do that.
look at us today. And let me just talk to the younger generation. How do we act or parents when they are mad at us? How do we react to them? I'll give you a scenario.
what I'm showing you now how much she has done. And that's what you need to think about when you start feeling hot blooded and like you know, how dare she talks to me like this. She doesn't know that I'm a man now. Look at the hair grown here and there. I wanted to be corrected.
I can figure out the whole world.
I don't need guidance anymore. Nobody should yell at me.
But they feel that they they they deserve some respect. They deserve some authority over you. Because your mom after carrying you for nine month, she doesn't even you know taste food nicely. She throws up most of the nine month
everything that's used to enjoy before pregnancy she doesn't enjoy now.
She goes through a lot if there is any deficiency in her body. Allah subhanaw taala made you feel karate McKean. You are in a logic inside you get everything.
You get everything 100% calcium, iron
and you're taking this from her body. She starts losing her teeth. She starts losing her hair
and she's very happy by carrying you
and she's she cannot wait to see you come into this life.
And she goes through all of this she almost dies
but she's in love with you.
And the moment she delivers you what happens after that all you have maternity leave now among go inshallah and take a month to go for Amara are going to Allah, you know to the Maldives, you know have some some fun? No. She cannot take leave.
You know, what's this?
Everybody's gonna be distracted. Now thinking about the candy. They're gonna forget about me.
You know what? I'm more handsome than this. Okay, just skipping.
Over talking about or talking about total? bahara I think
sort of lost.
The parents, the mother mesh allows the mother or he's still awake.
So we're talking about the mother. We said once the mother delivers you. Does she take leave sick leave? maternity leave.
Right away. She's still bleeding. She's like, you know, what is that? You know, dinosaur? I mean, monkey, what would you call an angel? Bring me my baby.
Right? I don't like when people go and say, you know, you know, you know when the when the babies are born.
To me, they look like dinosaurs.
But when you go there, you have to be courteous and saying, What a cute dinosaur a baby shower.
Like just a piece of
Right? This is our beginning. So anyway. So once the baby comes, what happens? What happens?
the mothers of Hannah law said, Bring me the baby.
And she starts feeding the baby right away. You know that the beginning of breastfeeding. It feels like bleeding.
itchy, he enjoys that.
And you never see this until you become an adult.
And you take your wife to the ER and see the pain she's going through. And they're going to say who is the first degree relative? We're gonna say?
I'm the scapegoat.
I'm the sacrifice. I'm the husband. So they take you inside once she's delivering and you'll come out with no hair and your clothes have torn because of the pain that she's going through what she's delivering. She's almost dying.
She's bleeding to death. yet. Once you come to this delicious bring my baby to me.
has put in the hearts of the parents for either him or her and own a boon. And then if you do near him, or
if you were to show mercy in this life, you're either a father or a mother. These are the embodiments of mercy in this life of Allah subhanaw taala.
Young people say, yes, young people say yes.
Listen to this carefully, we're lucky. We're lucky, we're lucky.
There is no one on earth that loves to see you better than themselves. Except your parents will lie on saying well, why no one on Earth would love to see you better than themselves.
Other than your parents, there is no one
in it to understand this.
And you need to appreciate this. So despite the fact that your mother goes through all of this, yet, she's in love with you, and she doesn't take leave. And how long does she do this taking care of a baby? once a week,
and the weekend
is 24. Seven, on a daily basis will lay there's a nice video, I wanted to go home and watch. Like it's a very nice one like job vacancy where they interview people. And they were telling them, you know, the requirement of the job. They said, there is no pay.
After they give them everything else. They said, How many hours Shall we work? They said 20 473 165?
Like what? No vacation? He said no.
Is there any break or rest? No.
Is there like any sleep or something? It depends. Like, you know, if the customer needs you, you can be up 24 seven.
They said, Okay, how much is the pay for that new job? Zero?
was like, are you crazy, who's gonna apply for that job. And then at the end, he said, Your mom has been doing this all her life. And everybody cried. Everyone who was interviewed cried, because we never think about that, that your father was out there in the cold. do two full time job, sometimes three full time jobs, to make sure that you have food on the table, to make sure that your tuition is paid
to make sure that you're closed and you're not feeling cold in the nice, sunny weather of Canada.
We all take this for granted.
how do we treat our mothers? I'm just giving you just a scene of what she does.
A little bit of a picture of some some sort of, you know, like, maybe a few days of your life when you were a baby, let alone she has been doing this all for all her life once she raised you to become a 14 year old boy. And Mashallah, once you see some hair in your face. You start yelling at her.
She says to you,
honey, listen you honey, why are you home late? I told you.
I told you I'm going to go out with my friends didn't tie. What do you always name me? And you slam the door?
And you go to your home? And she's standing there lucky enough? Why is he treating me like this? We'll come to Canada.
Is that what Islam teaches you? Is that what you learn from the culture outside?
And then she's standing there she can figure out why. Why are you talking about? Why are you yelling?
Her question is what she's worried about you. Why are you coming home late?
And then you go into your room and the anger turns into a smile. While you're texting your friend. Man.
I hate my life. What's going on? My mom man.
She keeps yelling at me all the time.
She doesn't understand me.
It's like Oh, don't tell me bro. My dad is the same here.
He sounds like to come to become from another planet, man. They don't speak the same language who speak Oh, don't talk to me about language man. You must come and listen to my parents. They have a funny accent.
You're making fun of your parents
who brought you here to learn, you know English without an accent. If it were not for them after the bounty of Allah, you wouldn't be here. And now we are making fun of their accent.
Is this how you pay them back?
And then you're chilling and relaxing with your friends smiling and sending Mashallah smiley face and happy face and baby face. And your mom kicks in again. What do you do? homework?
you're texting, you're doing homework, you're making fun of her. And you're that you're complaining.
Instead of being grateful to your parents, you're yelling at them when you're complaining. This is why one tip that I should whisper into the ears of the parents, especially with the younger ones. If you want to buy them a toy or a gift, buy it and then surprise them at home say, I got you this. We can be grateful. You know, the mistake that we do. We take them to the shop. How many toys are there? 150,000. They're getting all of this.
Right? They don't know what to choose.
And then they choose one and they throw it back. She's another one throw back. She's another one. And then by then I say you have to choose one because we're leaving now. They're gonna pick one. And they when you're standing at the cashier, they're crying, why? You're gonna mind the only one. You're gonna leave another 149,000 toys over there.
It's it's a consumer
That's how they make your kids greedy.
Right. And every other toy will be nice, except the one that they vote. And they're the one who chosen. Yeah, you bought me the cheap one.
You chose it.
And you're gonna be complaining. We're almost gratitude. But now we are turned into an
in gratitude and denial. And we teach our kids to be that.
Back in the days, we're lucky I remember. You know, our toys. We used to make them ourselves, sometimes out of stone out of wood.
And we're very happy. Today your kids are playing with the most sophisticated technology at the fingertips.
And now you have bs five.
Yeah, I'm one step ahead, man. I know you guys are like old generation ps4, right? Yeah.
Just buy them something new once they watch it on board.
You will hear this 77 times from a teenager at home on board. So Paula, you bought the last edition? You just watch it the new soccer whatever. Yeah. What is the next one coming up?
On board? You know why on board because you're not connected to Allah. Allah Dena
be the Quran.
You want to have that peace. You don't want to have that boredom in your life. connect yourself to a wall.
You'll never be bored.
So we are trained to be ungrateful.
I'm talking about the kid. Let me step up to teenagers and college and university students. Hello, smile. I'm calling you now.
So the top teachers like, you know, my dad is very cheap man is only paying 70 or 80% of my tuition. What did you think I'm going to do?
So he doesn't see the 80% but he's looking at the 20% he doesn't see what he's giving. But he sees what's missing. And that's exactly what Allah says
in Surah number 100 schools that I Viet in
is different from Jehovah.
Jihad means ungrateful. But canoed is even worse. Because you're ungrateful for things that you were given. But can you give us the millet of crude? You know, when your son opens the fridge,
and he starts counting 12345 kinds of cheese. Okay.
the one that I like is not here.
Okay, 12356 pops, where's the Pepsi?
The only one missing
12345 types of juice, but the one he likes is missing.
So you don't see all these blessings. He wants your brothers and sisters in Syria and Somalia. And in Africa. They're dying because they don't have clean water. are you grateful for what you have?
Will law here we have to appreciate what we have. Before we had to appreciate what we had.
Because we take everything for granted. And we only appreciate it when we lose it. We take our health for granted.
We take our parents for granted will lie. Look at those who lost their parents. They'll be in tears now they remember them. Because these were your keys to genuine dilemmas when asked to them and is your father life. He said no, he passed away it is your mother life is a BS. You should at least you still have a gate to Jenna. Don't waste it.
Don't waste it.
So I have to be grateful to them.
And you know what we do? That's exactly what I say. Like, you know my dad, you know? You know he he bought me a cheap car.
Said handler you have a car. Some other people don't have bikes.
Thank you. I have bus 11.
You know, bus 11 your legs. They're mobile. Some people even no move.
So you see, we are always looking for what we don't have. Thank Allah Do you have a dad who bought you that car.
But you see the culture we live under now. We're not grateful.
This is not
a lesson in May of Logan and
Oklahoma. If both of your parents reach old age, and they are now living with you in your own house. Both of them or either of them, fella Taku lahoma
don't say to them. And I was looking for the smallest word in the Arabic language.
And when it came to oath, it's not even a word.
You know what's oath?
It's the expression of frustration. It's not even a word.
You know, when your mom says it's your turn to take the garbage?
Did you make your bed?
Do I have to? It's your bed.
It's not my bed. It's yours.
Did you wash the dish that you just eat him? Is it my job?
what I'm saying. Can you just look at the way they're talking to you? Can you do me a favor? Just go to the grocery store and buy me some salt because, you know, I found out that we ran out of salt.
Why don't you ask my sister Why always me? You start healing.
She's even asking you as if she's asking you a favor. Who are you?
The own you you belong to them. They made you
and now you're frustrated by them by them asking you for something.
So let's hit filata Coloma off when I come home
you know sometimes when when parents become old, and maybe you know they cannot control you know things in their hands. And they eat or they drink soup or something they spill.
Cipolla there was a man
who made a plate of wood and a spoon of wood to his dad to make sure that he doesn't spell. And when his son saw this, you know in Arabic we say can I add to that?
As you do, you will be done by you'll be treated the same way when you grow older. So to sign keep saving and saving and saving until one day he got his dad was the younger man not the Grandpa, he gave him a gift, he said that I have a gift for you
and is that he was very happy when he opened the gift he was crying
you know it was it
was a wooden plate and a wooden spoon he said this is for you, when you become old, because they thought that you did the same to your dad
This is very very embarrassing.
So while I can have humor means do not, you know, scold them do not
was the other one reprimand them.
Do not blame them for something when they are old. They cannot control it.
They used to clean you not your mess. They used to clean you.
You should even clean them if they need to.
But some of us will say You know what? Even my dad was not there for me. So I'm gonna treat him the way he treated me. But the lesson to eventually they will.
If he was not a good father for you. He was the reason for your birth. He deserves a lesson to avoid me.
And whatever they missed, this is between them Allah Allah will hold them accountable for this.
So like I said, what I can have Hama, Baku lahoma. Colin mahabhava. So whatever comes of your mouth should be the best words. That's SM cola. Moreover, the best words, no foul language, no reprimanding no frustration. The best patience, the best curtsy,
the best help, the best obedience, the best smile, you name it.
And then, in conclusion, the last part that I said, walk with lahoma gentle handling.
And it should lower
you know the two ways
of have humbleness.
And what's the motivation? out of mercy to them? What's the analogy here? Allah's talking to you as if you're a bird, and when the bird you know, lowers their wings to protect the nest,
you know, in humbleness out of mercy to the young ones. So Allah as if a Lessing when your parents become old, they need protection, they need help. So you have to lower your ego.
You have to humble yourself and be in the service, not just talk back to them, or treat them in a bad way
out of mercy. And while they show that anger because they deserve some authority over you, and they think they deserve also some respect. And rightly so as I mentioned before,
they might be yelling at you and mad at you. What should you do in the action? Make it too hard for them?
Or Allah, show them your mercy. Come out of Bayani sahira.
The same way they showed me mercy when they raised me when I was young, and will lie, you will never realize what I'm saying until you become a dad and the sisters until you become a mom.
And I told you the story of one of my students who used to come in the halaqa. And he's now you know, he's a dentist in Edmonton. He called me at two o'clock in the morning and he was crying. And I said, Brother, what's going on? What's up?
He said Dr. Blair, I listened to you explaining this. I had
an article cam.
That was about nine years ago.
And he said now, the equal in my ears, because I'm living them. I said what do you mean?
He said, it's two o'clock now. And I'm telling my four month old baby because her mom has been up all night until she passed out. She couldn't take it anymore. So she woke me up, at least to take care of the baby until she can get some rest. And I have you know, clients come into the morning. He's a dentist. I need sleep, but I can sleep. So now I understand and realize that the elusive rocklahoma
Come out of Bayani Savio, Yala showed him mercy as they raised me when I was young. Now I know what my parents went through when I was the age of my baby now, and they used to be up all the night to make sure that my temperature will go down.
Only parents can relate to what I'm saying. Now, when they spend those sleepless nights when their kids were sick.
Your parents will deny themselves food to make sure that you go to bed with a full belly.
and ally use the verb Bob Bayani. This also another hidden meaning here, Rob Bayani comes from Caribbean. And the stem of the word is Rob.
Rob means, as we mentioned earlier, the one who brought you to life and the one who provides for all of your needs. And he's the one who sustains you. And he's the one who takes care of you. And he's the one who, you know, let you live day by day. He gives you that breath he gave you the parents, that's done.
So when you let him method, Allah, your parents are given the same concept of therapy, meaning they take care of you, they show love to you, they provide for all of your needs. So as if you're saying Yeah, Allah, I cannot show them mercy. The same way they showed mercy when they were raising me and you're the only one who can give back to them and can pay them back Yeah, Allah show them that mercy because I cannot do it myself.
And then the end the loss of Rob buku and Mr. Murphy in for sukham. Your rob your master knows what's in your mind what's in your heart now? intercooler Oh, sorry, he if you're righteous, and solid, he means if you're doing things rightly meaning if you are showing respect, and regard to your parents,
that's fine for in our beginner fora, if you're not, it's not too late. Many of us here amongst the young people are not treating their parents the way it should be. So you should right now, before you leave, or once you go home, give your dad and mom a hug. And say Please forgive me. I'm sorry. And I promise Allah loves you. I promise a lot. I will not do this back again to you.
Because now I understand that Al Asad, you know, intercooler sobre hain, if you are righteous, and if you want to go back to a lot of us, who can live our being, Indeed Allah is for those who are our being our being means those who admit their sense, we have wronged our parents, we mistreated them, but from now on will not talk back will show mercy to them will show the respect to them, will show obedience to them will not be mad at them.
We'll give them the due respect. So we asked a lot to forgive that. And then a lesson alone will give you His forgiveness.
So in conclusion, I asked, the parents sitting amongst the audience who are themselves sons, and their parents are still alive.
And if they are not here, you give them a call, when the time is right, and ask them to forgive you. Ask them to make the half free.
And for those young people, with their parents here, make sure that you give them a hug. And you give them the positive attitude from now on. And you make Toba for what you have done before.
And the practical steps that I'm going to give you to take those messages home. Don't ever think like that, you know, funny guy who came to me one time he said check. I followed what you said hamdulillah I did my parents a favor. yesterday. I said What is it? Mr. Smart, he said, I made my bed and
I said what? You made your bed. I thought you said you made your father's men are your mother's bed.
It's a must. It's thinking like you should do your you should make your bed. Do you think it's it's incumbent or it's the obligation of your mom to make your bed? It's you should make your bed.
So what should I do? I should do something that will make them happy. Buy them a flower. Buy them a gift, something that they like, you know do their belt you
You have to go and make their bed.
do the laundry without being asked.
Do the dishes without being asked? Take the garbage without being asked to do chores for your parents. Without being asked volunteers like No Mom, what can I do?
Well lay that's my inform your mom is going to open the gates for agenda for you. When, from your father, even if your father is tough with you, even if your father at some point of your life was not there for you, when from him will take you to Jim,
road on la tierra de noir in the pleasure of Allah is in the pleasure of the parents. If your parents are pleased with you, Allah is pleased with you. If your parents are not pleased with you will law whatever you get in this dunya you might have a good life you might have this, but later on, you will see the difficulties that you will go through. But if you take good care of your parents, even though they did not take good care of you will lie in the dunya you will be happy and in the ashram you will be happier. A whole homie has stopped for la de la comme la Maddalena, one Sabrina la falta when I went to LA Santa, Marina, Alicia feta when I made it and a lot of him to
Walla Hassan Haleakala wa salam ala Santa Barbara hermetica kamagra mean, Allahu Akbar fusina. taqwa was an
antibody you have a Mala. Aloha, my name is Ella Pato button. Remote was she had an Angeleno was in
Salafi and ethically maka Allahu
Allah moranbah home, watchable kestra home.
Allah Amina Amina, dunya
Illa in the law, also long Mullah Mohammed Allah early on Sofia Salam I know, you know, I took more than the time of Salah want to take more time of view, but I will just leave you with one message, you know, make one of your good character every day is to give Salah
every day, every day.
What you know, a good word is silica, a smile is soda.
Okay. And $1,000 you put in the under measure hit before you leave is a small sort of pattern. You know, it could be $20 it could be $5 as I said earlier or long, never looked down upon something I don't want to be like so demanding. But what I'm telling you, your message it it's your message, it needs your help. Because of how low we come and pray we come and benefit. We walk away. This message has so many bills, right? This message has so many financial responsibilities, it's your budget, and if you want to see your budget flourishing, support your budget inshallah you don't need somebody to remind you every time and I hate to ask people for that, but inshallah while you're leaving
$10 $20 $50 $1 or lucky, you know, it could be the decisive factor in the record of your deeds on the day of judgment in Sharla Baraka lafiya como de la Farah, and I want the young ones inshallah to line up here inshallah.