Nadim Bashir – Destruction through Distraction Due to Social Media
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss the negative impact of social media on people's lives, including distractions, loss, and negative emotions. They emphasize the importance of protecting privacy and disrespecting privacy on social media, as well as the need to limit one's time and use social media to stay connected. They also stress the need to be aware of one's own behavior and consider their own needs when sharing them online.
AI: Summary ©
Before I start
two important things, number one is that this is not a lecture only for the children. This is actually for the adults and the children. Because we have a lot of adults are also addicted to social media. So this is for everyone in the community number one. And number two is that I have chosen today not to use a table. And this is sort of like a teaching technique because I teach in a school. And one thing that I generally do to keep the attention of my students is that I always walk around in the class. I always walk around, and then I always write something on the on the board to keep their attention. So that's why I'm going to I'm going to just be walking around little. So if I
walk around anywhere, your eyes are gonna be following me in Sharla right? Yes or no? Okay.
Bismillah R Rahman Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi edge mine was sitting with a similar cathedral Cathedral on my bed. So hi, Nicola and Mona Ilana I Lempira in the cantilever Hakeem rubbishy Saudi Arabia, Cindy Emily, one of the melissani of Hakone.
The way I want to start the way I want to structure my, my lecture today is in such a way, that if you want to take notes and you want to remember my lecture, it will be very easy for you today. The subject of social media is something that when a lecture like this has given many of us find it challenging to recall that lecture. What did the Imam say? What did it was started say? What did the Hadith say? So that's why today, I want you to remember that there are three important things I'm going to be talking about today. Three, how many? I need your I need your cooperation and all this. How many? Three? First one, we're going to talk about the word aid A I D. I'm going to use this word
aid as an acronym today as what an acronym. The second thing I'm going to be talking about is harms.
And the last thing I'll be talking about is solutions or action items. So what's number one, aid number two harms and number three solutions. Let's start with let's start with the letter the first letter in aid A, this is in reference to the word Asar. How do you spell arson, ASR right, this is actually in reference to Sudha Well, ASA. Now the reason I bring before you Sudha will answer is because today in this day and age, social media has become a distraction for all of us.
And that is also the letter D in the word aid distraction.
What has happened is that in every single era of time, in every single generation of time, there are some things that distracts the human being.
For example, in Surah, Al monasticon, Allah says, Yeah, you have Lavina Amanullah totally he come I'm welcome, wala owner to come on Vickery Allah. Do not let your wealth do not let your children take you away from Allah subhanho wa Taala do not let them deviate you from Allah subhanho wa taala. Ya Allah mentioned wealth and children is because at that time that was a distraction.
Give you a second example.
The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is giving hotbar
he's giving hotbar and let us remember that the hot dog the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was no more than probably five, seven minutes at the maximum.
But there is someone who came and there was selling some things in Medina.
A caravan has just come in, who's going to go and buy the merchandise. There are some people who were there who stayed in the hotbar but there are some people who left what Allah say in the Quran, were either ot Jaya Ratan Allah one in for boo la ha, whatever Cuca called EMA they left you standing. What did they go for it? They went for the tea Jarrah. They went for materialism. Allah subhanaw taala he addressed that at that time, while the prophet is giving and he's delivering his sermon
that people are distracted by what business?
Allah subhanho wa Taala in Surah will answer he says well Ussery in an insider Luffy Hassan, Allah swears upon time. Let's take let's take this pause here for a moment and think about this.
Allah swears only upon those things which are extremely important. Allah does not swear upon something that is not important.
When Allah swears upon time, what does that tell us? is totally important or not yes or no? Yes it is. And then he says in in Santa Fe hoarser, the very the human being is in a state of Hazara, he's in a state of loss, What is Allah saying, and every single generation and every single error of time, there is going to be something, there is going to be something that will lead you to destruction
that will lead you to Kasara that will lead you to loss. Today in our times, there are many things that can lead us to destruction Hazara, but there is no doubt in the fact that today one of those things that plays a heavy role in our lives, is the is social media. So this is what Allah subhanho wa Taala is talking about. If Allah is talking about those distractions, and he's saying, Stay away from the distractions, if social media is a distraction in our life, what is Allah telling us? Stay away from those things that are distracting you a
The next word is Ay.
Ay stands for impact for what impact what a stand for.
Also So now well awesome,
I suppose for impact what impact is social media having on you? See, you know, when I remember when I was a small child, my parents were always told me that TV is haram. TV is haram. Most majority of us when we go overseas to our countries, our respective countries, we always hear the same thing that they say a TV is haram TV is haram TV is haram. But it depends on how you use television. See, someone can sit in front of television and use it as an educational resource. And they can use it as a beneficial tool, right. But there are some people who are going to use television and the wrong way. It depends on how you use television, which determines the outcome. Likewise is social media.
Social media for some people, it is a source of Dawa, they use social media. And he put on a hadith on social media. They will share a an anecdote on social media, they will share like a great advice that they've heard from a scholar on social media for that person, social media is absolutely fine. See, social media is like a double edged sword. It's like a double edged sword. Either you can use it in the right way or in the wrong way. So Allah subhanho wa taala, when he you know, giving us the life that he has, and how we are impacted by things around us. It's very important that we use social media in the right way. How's it impacting my life, if I'm sitting there on social media, and
I'm just reading news after news, you know, status updates, looking at other people clicking the word like 100 times in one session, that means that social media is not for you, you are simply wasting time on social media. But if you're using social media to get the message across to someone else, like for example, in, for example, last year, may Allah subhanaw taala have mercy upon our brothers and sisters and Philistine.
Last year, when when Israelis began to launch airstrikes against our brothers and sisters. One of the reasons that they did pull back, one of the reasons that the boycotts went into effect, and who helped these boycotts go into effect, who got the news? Who spread the news around the entire world that we need you because you know that these are the companies that need to be boycotted, you know this, do this, do that, do this do that. How do we get that news? It was through social media, right? Yes or no? You saw an every single thing. You know, it was informing us. So once again, what impact is it having on our life? I'm not here to ask you that question. You are the person that you
need to ask yourself that question. How much is social media having an impact on you? Are you becoming a better person through social media? Or are you becoming a worser? Person through social media? Are you wasting time through social media? You can sit for one hour on social media. You can sit for one hour on Twitter, and you can Tweet, tweet and tweet and retweet retweet. You can share, share and share. You know and you know, especially on Facebook, majority of the people on our Facebook who are our friends. Believe it or not, we don't even know them. We don't even know them. There's I remember I was on here.
Epic Alhamdulillah he was out here at Epic. I went to a masjid one time.
And right in front of me, a small kid like I think they were like 12 years old. Just 12 years old.
He gets up rafters a lot. First thing he does, he takes out his phone.
What does he do? Check his Twitter.
First thing, a slime article from the LA Rahmatullah. Let's see what's your Twitter saying? Okay, so Twitter. You know, when he does, he told us funny, he gets up and he's jumping.
So I'm looking, I'm like, What is this person jumping for? What do you just when something that he does get something? He told his friend, I have 10,000 followers. I have what I have 10,000 followers. Social media has taken over us and taken over us. People have 950 friends on Facebook, over 1000 friends on Facebook, and you don't even know the person's name who's praying next to you and so that every single day
you don't even know the people? How do you know if they're trustworthy or not? How do you know if they are actually true or not people? That's something that we need to ask ourselves, how much of an impact is it having upon us? So one was a one was I one was now as D distraction. Researcher brothers sisters, remember that shaytaan has taken an oath to Allah subhanho wa Taala when he was dismissed, what do you say to Allah subhanho wa Taala love it you're now home. Now, if you are a student of the Arabic language, you know, that this noon at the end of this verb love it yen with a shudder it means most certainly is used for emphasis in the Arabic language like Elena, Hakka, Hakka
I will most certainly do it
in the here in Shavon is saying to Allah La it and now whom I will distract this person, I will come to this person from where min Beatty ad him from the front woman holding him from behind wine, amen him from his right, once a melee him from his left means that I will distract this person as much as I can. Because that is what shaytaan does. shaytaan he distracts us. You don't like going to children, like when you want to get you know, when you want to distract a child. You know, you put some toys out that child goes and he keeps on playing with those toys, right? It's like a psychological effect. He keeps on playing with those toys and gets distracted. In the meantime, what
does the mother do? She goes and she's cooking. What does the father do? He goes in, he's doing his own work. The child is engaged, right? This is what Shavon is doing to us. He's distracting us. He's putting that social media out there for us. And he knows that it may be our weakness is our weakness. But Shavon is putting us there that you know what, you stay engaged with that? Well, I'll go and I'll see someone else. And I'll come back and check up on you after one hour. Okay, when you after one hour and you're tired of social media, that I will distract you with something else. This is what shaytaan does. His lifelong mission is to distract the human being to put the person in the
state of Kasara. So the most so when we when we talked about social media, three things to keep in mind. Three things to keep in mind. Number one is the pseudo will awesome. Are we headed towards her side or not? Look at my schedule, everyday schedule. How much am I you know, how much do I depend on this? That's the question that we need to ask ourselves. I stands for impact. Is it having an impact on you or not? And D is are you being distracted over and over again. So this is the word eight. What's the next thing I will say I will talk about the harms. See when it when you talk about social media, once again, you can use it in the right way. But you can use it the wrong way. Majority of
the people are using it the wrong way. There are going to be some spiritual harms. You're going to have psychological harms and you're going to have social harms. Let's talk about spiritual harms first.
You know, even though even though television is something television is something that is not may not be considered social media. But even when it comes to television, research Brothers Sisters, we have to closely see what our kids are watching on TV. You know, when I was growing up here in the United States, you know what I used to watch? I used to watch Tom and Jerry. Okay. I used to watch Pink Panther. Okay, I used to watch some of these cartoons I used to come on. Like I remember I used to like when I grew up. I was like a big transformers fan. Because we used to watch those transformers. Okay, Optimus Prime and Autobots and Decepticons. Well, I remember all that. Now at
the same time, keeping in mind is that if you compare the cartoons of the old age, like 1520 years back, those same cartoons, the same characters
I made those cartoons today. There's a lot of adult content in them.
There is there are some messages, hidden messages within these TV programs, that we're not fully aware of these Disney cartoons that our kids are watching. Believe it or not, they're not healthy for our children. They're not healthy for children. They're teaching immodesty. I know, you know, a cartoon that was that was that was very much famous Tarzan. How many of you remember Tarzan?
Always half naked.
Right? Always half naked. He's walking around with a shirt all the time. I asked you when kids are watching this when kids are watching this? What message are they getting from this? What am I getting to expose our bodies? What is the modesty in Islam teach us to keep yourself covered as much as you can. Right? Islam teaches us higher. Media is teaching us immodesty when we when we see all these other cartoons, like Dumbo Dumbo was a story about an elephant. But there was a cart. There was a time there was one movie about Dumbo. Where he can you believe it? But this is something that they show in the children's cartoons that he drinks. He gets drunk. He hallucinates. One message is
going to our children. When they're learning when they see about Snow White,
Snow White living with seven men.
Think about it. It's a psychological effect on our children. It's really a psychological effect on our children, the cartoons, the Disney cartoons that our kids are watching, think about this, even even like just a general movie. I'm gonna be very honest with you. Okay, there was a movie that, you know, that came out a few years ago, it was called Ice Age. How many remember just ice age just okay. Okay, now you know why? Okay?
About a huge mammoth. Okay. Part one is about protecting a baby.
And then why? Why is it that in part two, he has a girlfriend? What does children's cartoons have to do with girlfriend? Not only that, but in part two. Part two, he has a girlfriend and they have a child? What does it have to do with children's cartoons? I don't know. But it is it is these kinds of things that put these ideas in our kid's mind. And that's why I keep on saying that these things, they have a effect. They have a psychological effect on our kids. And that's why I always say know your kids media, know what your kids are watching. I know people I know people that they make it a point. They if their kids want to watch a movie, the first day will see the movie, they will get the
reviews of that movie, and make sure there's nothing wrong in that. Then after they will let their kids watch it. Don't let them know let the kids watch it. But please, when it comes to social media, when it comes to television, not just let your kids watch whatever there is out there. Because it's a dangerous world out there. You have no idea. It's a dangerous world out there. There are some so many other things I want to mention right now. There is some there like some you know, these hidden messages, even in Sesame Street. Even all these cartoons that we see. There's always like this hidden message in there. Okay, there's always a hidden message. So we have to be very, very alert
about this. Something else that we have done on social media. And this is not everyone. These are just few people. But it's something that should be aware of. You know, we've heard the word Mahajan. Alright. What is Maha German mean? Or Mahajan? What is Mahajan mean? Immigrant? What is the word Mujahid Amin
was the one who was the word Mujahid Amin Hmm. Which I hit it. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he asked his Sahaba you know who am I? Here it is?
And he said no. And he asked Do you know who is the most despised person to Allah subhanho wa Taala they said no.
The Prophet Allah is son replied It is the man. It is the man who has committed a sin.
Allah subhanho wa Taala conceals his sin overnight. But the next morning he goes and he announces it before the people that I have committed this sin. This person is called what a Mujahid someone who is extremely despised in the eyes of Allah subhanho wa Taala Now today on social media, what do people do?
They want to tell the world I have an announcement. Last night I did this and all these people would have like thumbs up like like like like like pre prepared comments. Oh, you're so cool, man. You're so cool. Man. You are a man.
Really? You might be a man before the other men, but you have no respect before Allah subhanho wa Taala
If you are displeased, you are despised before Allah subhanho wa taala. And if Allah despises me, it doesn't matter how many likes and thumbs up I get on Facebook, or how many people retweet my tweet.
It doesn't matter because it matters what Allah subhanaw taala thinks about me
keep these things in mind what you do stays to you people on social media, you know what they do? They go in they spread their families problems on social media, my brother this, my parents this my this my that. People will say, you know, and people are not people are not naive. When you go on social media, you say, You know what, you know, brothers should be like this. And parents should be like this. Who are you talking about? You're talking about someone in your family, you might be upset with someone in your family, you need to go and take care of it within your family. Social media is not to announce to the entire world, your problems. Social media is for another purpose. If
you have a problem in the house, you keep it in the house, you don't need to announce your problems to the entire world.
Some some of the problems that we have are some of the problems that come from social media.
being ungrateful.
You open up Facebook, you have a lot of friends. And remember, the more the friends, the more the more you read about their status updates. Let's say you have 1000 friends.
And it's summer vacation. They're all gone with their families. I'm here at this hotel, I've just checked into this hotel. No one cares to begin with, okay, no one cares. You just checked into Hotel. Or no one cares. You're eating a white plate of rice and no one cares, okay?
But I just went here, I went there. I went here I went there. Now a person is sitting there and from social media. And they're thinking to themselves, either whether it's, you know, there's Instagram, whether it's any other social media, there's pictures people sending on Instagram, too. I was here I was there selfies. You know, I'm not gonna get into selfies right now. But people who are addicted to selfies, they have a psychological problem, scientifically speaking. There are people who just like
selfies everywhere. Even eating food.
Look what I'm eating? Why? Why do you have to tell the entire world? It's a neuroma from from Allah subhanaw taala. For you enjoy it. You are with your family? Why are you so? Why are you so obsessed with telling the entire world what you're doing? Why are you obsessed with that?
One picture find that said every single moment of your life? Where is the privacy in your life? Where is the self respect of your life? So first of all, is that when we look at all this, a person becomes ungrateful. They're having fun, they have this, they're here. They're there. They're here, they're there. And where am I? I'm sitting in my living room. I have not gone anywhere throughout the entire summer. What happens? A person becomes ungrateful to Allah subhanho wa taala.
Then what does the person do? Okay, so you know what, they're getting all the attention, right? If all these people are putting something on social media, they're getting the attention. So what do I need to do to get attention again? Let me put something on Facebook. Then you put something else really outrageous on Facebook, or on Twitter. Okay. And then you know what happens, especially for people who crave attention? See, you know, children in itself, they crave attention. Why do children do like these one things at home, because they're looking for attention from the parents, when they know that my parents are not giving me attention, you know what happens, they'll go do something
else, they will do something wrong. Because that is the only way I'll get the attention of my parents. When adults are no different to they will go and they'll put something on social media, something on Facebook. And you know what happens? Five minutes go by, they're gonna again, go back. How many likes how many shares? One hour later? How many likes, how many shares how many views? I put a video on Facebook? How many people have viewed that you know what you're doing? You are absolutely in need of attention. If you are in need of attention, whose attention should you be trying to seek? Whose attention are you trying? Should you be trying to seek out who's who? Allah
subhanaw taala that is whose attention you should be seeking to different Amahl there are so many things that there's a hadith resource Allah was at when the prophets were Allah subhanho wa Taala says that when a person he does did not want to fail, then I began to love him. when I love someone, that person has my attention, right? Do I just love anyone if there's a person who I don't even know do I love them? No. I will love only someone if you have gotten my attention.
When, when we remember Allah subhanho wa Taala in a gathering, Allah remembers us in a noble gathering the gathering of angels. Do we have the attention of Allah? subhanho wa Taala Yes, we do. Should we care about the attention of Allah? subhanaw taala? Absolutely. Should we care about other people's attention? Absolutely not. We shouldn't be carried about who's giving me attention, who's not giving me attention, even if I had the attention of Allah subhanaw taala I am absolutely pleased. That's all I need in life. I want Allah subhanaw taala to care for me.
Lastly, I'm going to share with you about social media something that's very, very important. See, people are going to go on social media and they're going to share which is wrong first, they're going to share their details about their life. This is why me means so far this is what I like these are the songs I like these are the sports I like you know, when you said about first a Facebook account, they ask you all these questions, right? Where did you study they put your whole life out there on social media, but you know what happens after that. And then they will say put your pictures so you go into your photo gallery and you put all your pictures in there. The pictures are
supposed to be on online and the pictures that are not supposed to be online.
Sisters same thing, sent pictures without their hijab, on on unmeet on social media. Now what happens is this I want to share with you a hadith Ross was in fact to Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam
first one is a Hadith I'm aware of your wealth that I'm this is in Sahih Muslim, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says,
If someone looks into your house,
without your permission, if someone is violating your privacy
and you strike him
and because of us striking him, he loses his eyesight he becomes blind.
The problem says, You are not at fault.
You are not to be blamed. You are not at fault. Because you did not do anything wrong. First Hadith second Hadith in Bukhari and Muslim Hadith narrated by Solomon Asad of Allah Tala and a man came to the house of the prophets of Salaam.
There was a hole in the wall, or we hold on the door.
That man he was looking inside of the house of the Prophet salAllahu alayhi wasallam.
The Prophet SAW Salem at that time sitting in his home, he had like the end of an arrow, the end of arrow is, as you know, is a sharp object. And he'll just like, you know, just scratching his head, just scratch scratching his head.
The person he came inside later on was on the phone, he came inside
the province as someone told him, If I had known, you were peeping through that hole, and you were looking through that hole. And I had this in my hand and I knew you were there.
Even though the problem is so compassionate.
The prophesy son was so loving.
He cared about his Alma.
He loved everyone in his Alma, yet the prophet has some says I would have stabbed you in the eye.
I would have stabbed you in the eye.
When we go into other people's profile,
that is violating people's privacy.
Do you like for people to come into your house, your house and see what's going on? Or do you enjoy your privacy? Tommy, you enjoy your privacy, right? Yes or no.
When you put yourself out there on social media and you put wrong pictures, and you put things that you would like for it to be private information.
First of all, as you have done wrong, but the next thing is for us, for other people. You should not be going into anyone else's profile.
You should not be going into anyone else's profile. I know this sister is on Facebook. Let me go and check out her profile. Let me go and check out her pictures. She did wrong by putting her picture without her he does on social media. But you are no different. You are no different. You going and watching and seeing and being so you know you're so you want to see something so bad. You are violating someone's privacy.
You are violating someone's privacy that person has done wrong. Now let's just say a person puts their posts there on a on a status update. Okay, let's say someone has put up their picture on a status update, and you're scrolling through your Facebook account. And that picture comes. What do you do? Just ignore it and go forward. Ignore it.
Go forward, you will need to go there and see oh, you know what? First thing is halal. Okay. You know what they say? Like, you know the same in our countries ballenas or Moffitt. Right. The first the first time you see something is haram, it's forgiven. But you know, what do you do? Like, first thing? First thing? First thing? That is that is not right. So these are, these are few things. Keep in mind, you don't want to put yourself out there and all not only that, but you don't want to violate anyone else's privacy. So these are some of the harms. So we've covered aid, we've covered harms. Last thing I want to share with you, what are some of the words some of the action items
right now? Right now, I want you all to take out your phones, just let's just do an action item right now. I want all of you take out your phones right now. Let's go Come on. All of you take out your phones.
You guys, young guys, or you take out your phones. So I know you guys have you may have right.
On everyone's got your phones.
I want you to do one thing for two days. Just turn off your notifications.
Turn off all your notifications, your email notification, your Facebook notification, your Twitter, your your Instagram, your Pinterest, anything that you have, just turn it off. It doesn't mean that it's deleted. It means that it's just off right now. See, let me tell you one thing. First thing is that we have to we have to, we have to basically turn off our notifications. You know what happens? There's a notification on Facebook. I gotta see what's in there. I guess he was in there. So you open Facebook. Then you turn off Facebook. And then you see there's a notification for Twitter. I guess he wasn't Twitter now. There's a notification for emails and go to check what's in my emails.
We sit on our phone and we spend countless hours not realizing that the day is going by. Our life is going by and we're giving so much time to this. We're given so much time to this. Once again. It is in some ways is how it comes down to how you use it. First thing I want you to do is just turn off your notifications for two days. And ask yourself has there been a difference in your life? Have you given less time to your phone or not? You be the best judge so that's the very first action item is turn off your notifications. Number two
unfriend,
unfriend, unfollow and unsubscribe.
What I just say,
unfriend, unfollow, and unsubscribe.
Unfriend is worth what?
Facebook and follows with what?
Twitter and unsubscribe
YouTube
when you keep on subscribing to YouTube, also, you get every single every single video that comes on, you get a notification.
If you aren't subscribed to a series on YouTube, a TV series every single time there's a video out there about a TV series, you're gonna watch it. If you are hooked on and you are addicted to one TV show, you are going to be restless until you watch every single episode of every single season. And if you have reached the limit of all the seasons, and the series is not over is going to eat you inside. When is the next episode? When is the next episode. When is the next episode. Do not let social media take over your life do not allow you to take over your life today. If there are people on your Facebook that you don't know. And you have never benefited from them, unfriend them. If you
don't know them, then why are they your friends? If there are people on your Twitter account that you follow and you have benefited from them fine higher, but if there is no benefit, then unfollow them today. If the US subscribe to some certain accounts on YouTube, and it's not benefiting you that you need to unsubscribe today. Second action item second action item is unfriend, unfollow and unsubscribe. Third one,
start hanging out with real friends instead of virtual friends
started hanging out with friends, real friends, instead of virtual friends. You know, when we spend when we when we go and we visit each other. I've seen this happening.
People are just on their phone all day long.
We all have this problem some way somehow. At times, I may have the same problem too. But a lot of times it's the budget emails by the way, okay, if you see a lot of times with my phone, I'm checking my emails. Okay.
But on the other hand, you see people sitting down. And it's just you know, instead of people coming together, people don't want to leave their home anymore. Why? I'm fine at home, I will sit on my couch, two hours, watch YouTube, go through Facebook, go through Twitter, Instagram, and do just sit there. Long time ago, people went out they explored the world around them, they explored the world around them.
Today, everyone wants to sit at home in their in their own corner of the house with their own phone, their phone connected to a charger and it is after hours after hours. Stay away from that last thing, an action item.
During family time, there is no gadgets allowed.
There are no gadgets allowed, you know few things I'm going to tell all the parents over here.
First of all, is you should not be giving your children more than one hour of social media or YouTube anything combined a day no more than one hour. For that one hour. For B besides that one hour, the rest of the time. All the tablets, okay, all the tablets, all the phones are going to be put in one place. No one has access to tablets. Today in our homes. Every person has a phone. There are three four tablets in our homes, to two laptops in our homes. And then even on top of that, we have two three desktops. Stay away from that stay away from all that. When you have time in the family when you are sitting down as a family the other day, the other day, someone sent me a
picture. They have gone to visit their grandmother, okay, gone to visit the grandmother. Grandmother is sitting in the middle. It's an L shaped sofa, grandmother sitting right in the middle. On one side, you have the Father which is her son next to the Father, or the husband is his wife. So that showed these two he was sitting on one side of grandmother. And on the other side there are five children. Here when I saw that picture, father is talking father is talking to his to his mom, mom is on the phone.
All five kids are leaning back against the couch and they're on their phone too.
When it comes to family time, it is only family time talk to each other, please talk ta LK, talk to each other, communicate with one another. Talk about something random, if you had any talk about make us something to talk about. But talk to each other communicate with each other.
Another picture, I saw a great idea. People went to a restaurant, people went to a restaurant. When they went to a restaurant, six people went to the restaurant, they all put their phones in the middle of the table, the very first person to pick up their phone to check up their notifications is going to pay the entire bill.
The very first person is going to pick up that phone is going to pay the entire bill. And guess what they made, they made an agreement we're going to eat like we've never eaten before. So that means as you order so much food, and we're going to wait for the first person to pick up their phone. The first person who picks up their phone, they're going to pay the entire bill. Now you will see who's gonna pick up their phone, no one's gonna pick up their phone, then you're gonna sit down and you're going to talk to each other. When you go and you spend time with your family, talk to each other, communicate. You know, people come to me so many times, I have a communication problem my children,
I cannot communicate with my husband, I cannot communicate with my wife. Why are these problems occurring is because you never communicated. When times were fair when times are great. Now you only communicate when times are bad. When there's a conflict behind between you. When there's a fight between you only then you communicate. You're supposed to be communicate on a day to day basis. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam every single day Every Saturday. He will go to each of his wives, and he would sit down with him for a while and talk to them. How's everything today? What's going on today? Do you need anything you would talk to each one of them? The wives that otherwise
the problem is they will make a note who what did the person do at their house? What did you do at their house? They were eager to know they wanted the person to come and sit with them in the province or something he will go to each wives house and he will sit with them and talk to them. How many times would he sit down with his own children talk to them on a day to day basis. When it comes to dinner time. When it comes to nighttime. See the kids go to sleep early during the school days. The kids go to sleep.
They go to sleep early during the school days before they go to sleep. You have dinner during all the dinner table. There is no phones allowed. No phones allowed. No phones. I absolutely no matter who's calling you. Okay? Even if Baroque
Obama's calling you you don't answer it. Okay? You put the phone on the site, how many times your phone text message or text message? I don't care. We're sitting on the table and your attention should not be there. When you're seeing that a night, talk to each other what happened in school today? Tell your kids what you did at work today. What's wrong with that? Tell your kids. What did you what you did at work today? You went to the masjid share with your kids what you heard at the budget today. The Imam said this The Hatim said this that was done said this, there was a guest speaker he says something very amazing. I want to share this with all of you communicate with each
other. So for things that we have to do, what's the very first thing that we have do action item?
Come on?
Turn off watch notifications number two.
Unfriend, unfollow, and on Subscribe. Number three.
There was the fourth one.
be hanging out with real friends then compared to virtual friends. And the last one is during family time would look.
Okay, okay. Even it's the third one, okay. At least someone's checking Facebook. Okay, so we keep these things in mind look, is a challenge for all of us. It's out there. We're gonna, it's around us. We can't escape it. But the most important thing that we can do is that in these kinds of times, we can limit ourselves. We can limit ourselves, we can put a restriction on ourselves, we can put we can be hard and tough on ourselves. And you know what, you know, people ask me, I spent two hours on Facebook every single day. What am I supposed to do? How do I limit that? You know, I told that person is very simple is absolutely simple.
For every first keep one hour, okay, if you're gonna minimize from two hours
if you're gonna if you have a problem that you're spending two hours every day on Facebook or on social media, first, you gotta take baby steps. Okay, you gotta take baby steps. I'm not gonna say you know, what, two hours from two hours go to 15 minutes. I'm not gonna say that to you. I'm gonna say from