Life with Children #09 Don’t let this go to waste

Okay, so Mr. Lincoln want to know what occurred? I don't know what happened to that previous video, all of a sudden my phone just stopped it. So let's try this again. Okay, so this is part nine, the ninth installment of our journey through life with children, we are at the 19th verse of sudut. Look, man, and this is where Allah subhanho wa Taala brings up another interesting subject that needs to be talked about as well. And this is the final piece of advice that lokman alayhis salaam is giving to his son. And he tells him looks into fee machinic what will be the mainland sold tick in Qatar, a sweaty low salt will help me. So now let's back up for a minute and really summarize and

look at everything that's happened so far with the advice of a father to his son. Remember that this advice began with sugar with gratitude. And gratitude is the key to all success. It is the peak of wisdom. And when you're grateful in life, there is something that immediately follows with gratitude. And that's why in the middle of this advice, Look, man earlier he said I'm told his son last minute either mount or Saba, be patient for everything that happens to you. So that's poor ends way of really saying that, look, when you have gratitude, what immediately follows is patience. And what we said is that

when you're grateful for the things that you have, whether that be material, materialistic things, whether that be your family, when you're grateful that you have parents, maybe they their parents that don't speak the way you do, they're not as educated as you are, but you're still grateful you have them, you love them, and you respect them. All of these things eventually lead to you being more patient in life. So when you do see other parents doing certain things that your own parents don't do, it doesn't bother you one bit, you still say Alhamdulillah, I got my mom and dad, they're healthy, they're with me, they support me, they love me, they take care of me they do all of these

things. And so that's what this is all about. Shakur and Sabra are both sisters to one another, you can't have one without the other. And so people always ask the question, Well, how do I develop subtotal? How do I develop patience. And the answer to that is you need to be grateful, grateful that you're alive, grateful that you're able to think that you're able to talk that you can see grateful for just the things that we take for granted each and every day. Then the next stage afterwards is the father is now going to warn his son about kibble like what this massive subject of pride, and in this particular section of the horror, and we saw that pride has several different

levels. And one of the most delusional types of pride is what the core end calls and this was yesterday's verse in the law, your book Columbo tied in for who? Allah does not love them more than in falsehood. mortality,

actually comes from the word hydrogen and hydrogen refers to a beautiful horse that likes to run around and show off its you know, it's run its physique, its beauty, you know, and and that's what height one is. And what Allah is saying is that, look, man, either he Sam is basically telling his son Stop pretending or don't ever pretend to be something you're not. So don't develop this delusional perception about yourself. And what are the examples again, for those of you who are still with me, when the video cut off, the previous video cut off, I'm just going to go through those points again, just for those of us who are joining us, for the first time.

I had this example of a student and sometimes occasionally I see students like this, you know, when they come into class, especially some of the teenagers, you know, sometimes they would be sitting at the back, and they would be like, you know, I'll show you what they do. They'll be sitting like this, and they'll kind of have their back. And I don't know what it is that they're doing. I don't know if they have some sort of chronic pain or what's going on, right? But the guy tries to like some of these students try to act like they're gangsters in a class in a Masjid. Right, and we're going for Salah, the guy is just dragging his feet and staring down everyone. It's like, what are

you doing? We're just clinical pray, you're in a mess to just be yourself, act normal. That's what Allah subhanaw taala is saying is that don't especially as a believer, don't conduct yourself, don't act and behave like someone you're not. And all of this is developed, you can develop the discipline of just being yourself by being grateful by being patient. And so this is all about self control now, and then Allah subhanaw taala takes that conversation one step further. Listen to what he says next will be messy. Fix your posture. So when you walk now, don't walk with a swag. Don't walk with your chest puffed up a lot. So we'll just say be humble. Now, you know what's amazing to me about

verses like this, that the poor and even telling

How to walk. It doesn't just tell us what to say it doesn't just educate us on what we need to do. But Subhana Allah, Allah subhanho wa Taala also.

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Okay. I hope that everybody can see me while he was out for too long. Okay, I just noticed a comment from Maya Howdy. I hope that you can you guys can see me, it seems like everything is working just fine. So if you all can see me, whoever can see me Just give me a thumbs up or send just some kind of indication that you're with me here.

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Okay. So you know what, guys? What I'll do is Oh, okay, so you're good. You can you guys can see me. Okay. Sorry about that, guys. I mean, technical issues, I guess is, is bound to happen when we do this kind of presentation. Okay, I'm going to continue in Sharla, then, Watson fee Mashiach will build a million soltec. So now we'll let tells us how to walk, fix our posture, behave, act accordingly. But at the same time, Also, make sure that you lower your voice and you control what you see what you say, and the tone of your voice. So that's really important control the tone of your voice. Now, here's the thing.

It's like when the kid is standing in front of an adult, whether the adult be their parents or anybody else, and they're shouting at them, or they're upset, or they're grounding them. And the kid gives a look like this. Alyssa Valentine says, Don't do that. Fix your posture, or you look fat up when your parents are talking to you. You're just like, Okay, oh my god, you know, just finish up, mom. Okay, yes, I hear you a lie. So Joel says, Don't do that. And that's the advice of look man to his son. It's like, the end of the day. If you'd like missed out on all the advice I gave, you just behave like a good like a good person, act and be yourself. Be humble, be kind, respect your elders,

all of these things. But then parents, the parents also this advice is for us as well. to not give the impression that some kind of lump, you are superior to your children, so you can control them. And you can say what you want to do what you want and embarrass them in the grocery store at the mall. Don't do any of that. This a a speaks to us just as much as anyone else. So it's really important for us to understand that. Despite that this is going to a parent from a parent to their child. It's also relevant to all of us as parents as well. We need these kinds of reminders. And then Allah subhanho wa Taala concludes and he says in the end capital of SWOT analysis will help me

the worst type of sound is that of a mule, of a donkey. Now, keep in mind that generally speaking across the globe, donkeys are sort of have become like a symbol of stupidity. Like, even when we want to say somebody, look, you're acting crazy, you're acting dumb, you're acting like a donkey. Like cultures use that term to symbolize stupidity. And that's not what this verse is actually referring to. It's not talking to about how dumb donkeys are. what it's talking to you about is that actually, that sound of when a donkey neighs or makes their sound makes their call? It's going to be as though all this advice that the Father gives to his son, and he still didn't get it. It's as if

he's saying to it's like, as if a donkey is calling out to you, and you didn't hear anything. So it's like, you've now become the donkey, the listener, you've become the donkey. We're trying to talk to you and you're just sitting there and you're just going about your life, you know, you're just grazing away you're making these weird sounds, you're just saying blah, blah, blah. So our version of this when we respond like that of a mule is when the kid and parents pay attention to this is when the kids say things like Yeah, whatever. No, okay, or they they make they make sounds like oh, okay, fine. Yes, yes, I'll get it done to Allah subhana wa Tada, you're behaving like a

donkey. Don't do that. And that's like the worst thing that you can do an actor behave like that in front of a crowd of time and remember donkeys are also talked about it other suitors as well.

Allah subhanho wa Taala tells us on the Day of Judgment,

that the donkeys they will carry their load, yeah, middle Estrada care, that they will have this load this burden of knowledge that they will be dragging on the Day of Judgment. What that is symbolizing, what that's telling us is that all this knowledge came to them and they did nothing with it. They just put it on their back and they continued moving forward. So so chemetall humanity. Yeah, Mila Estrada, they become like donkeys and they carry

This knowledge and it didn't do anything for them. So it's really important for both parents and the kids, when you're having these kinds of conversations, and you're trying to teach each other some of the values, whether they be Islamic or just in society and some of the good things, that you want your children to be good people, you want them to be strong, you want them to be humble, you want them to be educated focus, all of these wonderful qualities, it's important that you figure out what works for you in a way that you don't come off that you're better than anybody else. Remember, parents, we are going to be accountable the same way our children are going to be accountable, we're

going to be asked the same questions that they're going to be asked. So it's important that when we try to encourage one another that we put ourselves at the same level as well. And for the kids.

Yeah, despite that your parents may not have gotten the education you have, they may not have been given the opportunities that you're currently enjoying. Just remember, Allah subhanho wa Taala says, well, field level management has only mean or lower the wings of mercy towards your parents, that's poor ends way of saying, doesn't matter what you have, put yourself at their level or poor, go below that as well. Don't try to ever for a moment think that you are smarter or more superior to your parents. If they can barely speak English, guess what, try to learn the language that they're speaking and speak with them. Don't just be like, Mom, I can't believe you can't even speak English,

we've been living this country for like 20 years, you don't get to do that. If they've never gone to high school, because they've been busy working so that they could support you, they could give you the things that you want, then you never ever get to say to them, that's a panel law. You know, I went to school, and now I'm in Tibet independent and look what you're doing with your life, you buy them now everything that they want, you take care of your parents now. And that's what these verses and these pieces of advice have no family has some is really saying that at the end of the day, at the end of the day, when you're grateful, you're able to be patient. And when your patient, Allah

subhanaw taala protects you from kibbeh your patient with yourself, your patient with what you're learning, and you're humble, you have this, you developed a sense of humility that people respect and people recognize and people appreciate. And then in turn, you also continue to appreciate others as well. You respect them, and you love them. And you never judge. You don't look down at anyone, you never judge anybody. And at the end of the day, even if you have no knowledge, people can just look at you I know, that's a humble person, their normal, you know, they they fix their posture, they fix the way that they walk, they don't try to show off or pretended to be somebody they're not.

They're just normal people. And so for the young young people that are looking at this, but also the parents to understand that these verses and these pieces of advice work both ways, despite in context, it's going from a parent to the sun, this entire book is for all of us. And so with that being said, tomorrow, inshallah Tada, we're going to look at a different section of the Quran, I'm going to introduce that for you for you as well, inshallah, we're going to go to pseudo puzzles, so little puzzles. For those of you who read this sorta and know the surah, you'll notice something very quickly in the beginning verses of the sword, like after the first four or five verses, you'll

notice that there, it looks like this sorta is almost like a sister Sora to sort of use it, because it's got similar verses that are almost the exact same wording of sort of use of what a man should down West, our attina now hookman we're in there. So we find that in sort of puzzles, and then in soon, it'll use if it's a very similar verse, just one word is missing. So the point is, is that it looks like they're giving almost the same message, but they're different. But what's the what's the theme? what's, what are these two sodas really about? sort of use it is a relationship now. So it's not necessarily advice. It's more of like, building that relationship between a son and a father. So

you have use of it Simon jacobellis, but then sort of costs us it's more about that relationship between a mother and her child, her son, you have musalla his son, and his mother. And all that happened and all that she was feeling that she had to give up her child and what led to all of that, and the promises of Allah subhanho wa Taala gave her that if she followed through with this command, he would not let her down and how she developed that trust, but the there's a deep

underlying issue here that we want to talk about that would help us extract some of the parenting techniques and benefits for all of us. So the fact is that you have one sorta father and son, then you have another suitor mother and her child, mother and son. And we put these things together. The fact that they're similar, shows that both Mom and Dad, you have to be on the same page when you're parenting your children. The fact that Allah put similar verses in sim about similar scenarios, but from one parent and the other parent would still some of the verses overlapped, and they became so similar indicates to us that parents, we have to be able to synchronize our techniques, the way that

we discipline, the way that we teach all of those things. You can't have one parent that says, yes, you can have ice cream for dinner. And mom is in the kitchen, cooking up a storm cooking the healthiest foods, preparing it for the child, and you went and ruined the appetite. No, you got to be just as concerned for the health of your child as mom is. And you can just if the kid does something wrong, okay? And you decide, okay, you send them to the room. But then one parent goes up there and orders pizza and be like, okay, let's have that. Let's make this the best grounding experience ever can't do that. And so even when it comes to teaching, you'll be teaching poor and

you'll be teaching something else. And then one parent just came up with their own version of Islam and just started teaching that as well. It's not going to work. So immediately, just the overlap in terms of similarities in the verses between these two sources is absolutely remarkable, great wisdom extracted from that. There's so much more to talk about. So I'm going to reserve that thing, Chatelet tomorrow. And so tomorrow, stay tuned and be ready for those of you who have been supporting me through the through the series. I don't know what else to say except to offer you the best gift that I can possibly offer you where I am. And that's not a thank you. It's something more

than that. And I want to just offer all of you that watch this and you share it I see it all the time. I want to just pray that Allah subhanho wa Taala reward, honor and bless you in the best way possible that's pleasing to Him. I want to ask that Allah subhanho wa Taala help you with whatever struggles that you go through in your life at any level, may Allah subhana wa tada ease the struggles for you. And may Allah so God bless you all agenda to the Philadelphia area, all of you and myself. I hope that one day we will all be sitting together in Paradise, I think about this a lot, that we're all be sitting in genda together in sha Allah, and what have you might come up to me

and say, you know, hey, I was one of those viewers that watched you when you used to do that series. And I can say to you, that's a panela it was for people like you that I did it. And I just want to be able to meet all of you and say thank you to all of you and then metallized so it'll keep us together in the best way in the best way possible in this world and in the effort or in short long Tara such as ecolo height and for for your support and for watching this and for sharing it and mail lines. So don't allow that everything that I say that as you share it and as you take from it that you also get compensation of the reward in short, a low target low man. I mean, I see a lot of you

commenting so I'm just going to scroll back everybody sending their Salaam Alaikum Salaam Rahmatullah.

That should be wrong with this completely off of the education mother. Very good. Uh huh. Well, yeah, cool. Okay. I don't see any questions or anything. So if you have any questions, just send it in the comment Otherwise, I will speak to you all tomorrow inshallah. Take care. Everybody said I'm Riley Camarena Tula. He wabarakatuh