People Always Hurt My Feelings
Channel: Muhammad ibn Adam al-Kawthari
File Size: 9.13MB
Episode Transcript ©
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you haven't hamdulillah Alameen wa salatu salam ala Sayyidina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi Germaine could live in Abu
Dhabi along originally found I would find every Muslim tena was in Ramadan y'all but I didn't know about
it especially brothers and sisters, salam Wa alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatu
today's reminder is actually very important.
There is a Hadith in the Sunnah of the monetary money where the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said
and Muslim either kinda U haul it on NASA or yes we're
hiring men and Muslim lady there you call it on us when I used to be
a believer who intermingles with people and exercises patients sub upon the harms and difficulties that he experiences or she experiences is better
than another Muslim
who does not intermingle people and hence does not have to exercises summer patients on any harms and difficulties that he receives.
This hadith is actually very important what this hadith is trying to tell us brothers and sisters, the messenger Salallahu Alaihe Salam is explained to us that
as human beings, all of us,
we live with one another.
A human being is a social animal. So we have to live with one another.
And we intermingle with people, we have relationships, we have spousal relationships, husband wife, relationship, parents, children relationship. siblings have relationships, employer employee relationships and generally with human beings we have relationships on a daily basis, we intermingle we mix and we have to intermingle with people. So the messengers of Allah Azza wa sallam is saying that when we intermingle with people, a believer who intermingles with people who mixes socializes
and exercises, patience, on the harms and difficulty that he or she receives, which means that
because of intermingling with people, as a consequence of socializing with people, it is a must, and it's given, without a doubt, your feelings will be hurt, because we, we interact and we socialize, part of socializing with other human beings, our feelings will be hurt. And the reason for this is that because we are all different, Allah has created humans differently. mentally, emotionally, psychologically, we are different in our temperament in our nature. And because we are all different, even physically the way we look, no two who two human beings look the same, right? Nobody, even fingerprints we have every single human being has a different fingerprint of the earth.
So we think differently, we have our own opinions. So if that's the case, that if we are living together, we have relationships, it's inconceivable that we will not have differences of opinion and our feelings will not be, it's just not possible. If you think that you want to marry for example, we'll have a family with you, and no one will ever hurt your feelings, then you're living in some other world, you know what I mean? This one, this is what this hadith is saying, the messengers of Allah instead of me saying that by socializing as a result of socializing, our feelings will be hurt. So the believer who socializes and as a result, and as a consequence, his or her feelings will
be hurt because somebody might say something which you don't like somebody might have a different opinion somebody might do something slightly different from you. You can't make them do things like the way you want because they are different. So if that happens, unless you just sort of avoid using them says that believer who may socializes and hence has to do southern southern patients on the feelings are hurt is better than another believer
who doesn't socialize like someone says, You know what, I'm just going to live on top of a mountain in a cave. So that's why Hamdulillah you know, my feelings are not heard and know that I've hurt anyone's feelings. You can do that if you want to. But the one who takes the challenge says no, I will live in the midst of human beings and I
No exercise sub is far better than the one who thinks I don't want to socialize. I don't want to intermingle and I want to go on top of a mountain and cave. It's like a blind one man says, You know what, I never commit sins of the eyes because, you know, I don't commit sins of the eyes. I mean, what's there if you don't have eyes to commit sins, you know. So it's like that if a person says I don't want to intermingle, and hence he doesn't have to exercise, patience and sub,
the other person is far better. And this is what the messenger sort of already was Salam is saying in this hadith. So this hadith tells us that look, our feelings will be hurt. What do we need to do? We need to exercise Saba the solution is summer patient seriously, summer is such an important you know, weapon and an amazing characteristic amazing quality and attribute that anyone can possess. This is why the Quran says in your first lobby Runa as your home be ready hisab the rewards for those who exercise somewhere and patience there is no end to that there is no recognition there is no like end to it.
Amazingly, what am I did not even mentioned there's no end to the rewards that will be received and gained by those who exercise several patients.
So this is what we need to do. Our feelings will be hurt. But look, we only have two choices. Right? Well, the third choice is like you know, going on top of a mountain and cave so I'm not even talking about that. But when we socialize we have to
choices two options. We live in a family we are married or not married or we have siblings or people around us human beings our feelings are hurt okay? And that's given it they will be hurt. There's no human beings can say no human being who can say my feelings have never been has no reason that offended me or nobody's ever sending me or you know, no, I have never experienced any hardship or difficulty. So, this is given. Now we have two options two choices. One is that if someone
hurts us, someone harms us hurts our feelings. We say yes you know what? I want to take revenge we retaliate we wanted to prolong the debate we argue we cause a fix and tribulation argumentation conflict the family is at war mother in law daughter in law suits the law father in law brother in law this law that law whatever I don't know, but everyone phone calls someone is just continues Karazhan episode after episode after episode is like just continuous. Like a soap opera and fights families that are warm. You just continue with this. Okay, that's one choice.
If you do that, and you take that option life become a misery there'll be no peace no tranquility you won't be happy. You're just fighting, fighting, arguing, debating and just always in fitna and conflict
the second option which is the messenger of allah sallallahu Sallam is guiding us and telling us and informing of off in this hadith is that you think to yourself that you don't want so what if someone said something about me? Who cares? Someone say something bad about me someone hurts my feelings doesn't make me bad. This life is so short it's only 5060 years of life that does eternal inshallah bliss for the sake of Allah. Let me just exercise Summerland patience and let it go, who cares? You know, you shall not didn't make me a bad person, I have more important things than I should do. And you leave lay let it go. Subhanallah The matter has ended no arguments, no computer, no debates, and
you receive rewards via radio. Hey, sir.
So this is what we need to do. Sharla you know, exercise summer, and patients when people hurt hurt your feelings. I don't mean, what I'm not saying here is that even if the harm is to an extreme level, like if there's physical abuse, someone's punching you hitting you, oppressing you. And you say, I just want to
punch me more. I'm just gonna die. No, that's not what I'm saying. Okay, there's there are levels and steps. Of course, if you guessed extreme, then of course, you know we have a right to repel the oppression. But what I'm talking about is that you know, everyday life people say things here and there of feelings get hurt, that you shall love for the sake of Allah exercise somewhere in patients so you will see the benefits of this in your life. Just like Allah Hi, may Allah grant us to act upon this article Alfie Kohn will only have so send them out as either Hamid
Sunni Muslim or eco