Soften Your Heart with Ramadan

Mufti Menk

Channel: Mufti Menk

Episode Notes

share this pageShare Page

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:00--> 00:00:03

Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.

00:00:05--> 00:00:12

smilla rahmanir rahim al hamdu Lillah wa Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah Allah, Allah, he was happy.

00:00:13--> 00:00:50

Once again, my brothers, my sisters, we always praise Allah subhanho wa Taala we seek His protection from we seek His protection against all evil and we ask him, every goodness, not just for us, but for humanity at large. And we send blessings and salutations upon Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and all those who are sent from the very beginning to remove us from darkness and to take us to the lights, I mean, and we ask Allah to bless their companions and to bless every one of us and to grant us all the best of this world in the next army. My brothers and sisters every year, the month of Ramadan comes.

00:00:51--> 00:01:34

And this month, it brings about a different joy. We become happy people Mashallah during the month of Ramadan, especially when we're about to see the moon. And then once the moon is sited and the excitement of the first few nights of taraweeh sort of dwindles, we find the masjid is slightly empty and people start beginning to feel like gosh, I've still got 27 days to go right. And then when you're in this part of the world Subhan Allah it becomes so prolonged especially during these years, but Allah compensated but a few years down the line you guys will be having the shortest fasts ever right? We might have to come here for Ramadan at that time. For now you can come over by

00:01:34--> 00:01:58

us it's fine No problem. It's actually permissible to travel to a place where the fastest shorter nothing wrong to do that. You can actually travel to a place where the fastest shorter in order to spend Ramadan with your children or those who might not be so well or those who just cannot keep such a long, fast. It's not prohibitive. May Allah subhanho wa Taala make it easy. I know you're looking at me like are you going to give us the money to go on holiday.

00:01:59--> 00:02:44

But my brothers and sisters Ramadan is a blessed month it's a blessed month, when we see the moon that goodness and when you know the lights are turned on in the masjid and the people are fulfilling their salah and even in the homes. The environment is such that Allah has the blessedness you feel it, you can actually feel it. It's different. The food you consume during the evening in Ramadan has a taste to it that is different from that which was eatin even if it were the same dish before or after Ramadan. It's a blessing. But my brothers and sisters remember that that initial hype the initial high that we're sorry, I'm not talking of cannabis, not at all, but the initial high that

00:02:44--> 00:03:15

you feel Subhana Allah, we need to maintain that you need to keep going. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam has taught us about how the best of deeds are those that are done regularly even if they're little small deeds but done regularly so when we start Ramadan Yes, we're excited the first day we would the Imam we heard the whole of Surah Baqarah Mashallah. tabarrok Allah The next day we're not there. Why it was a bit long yesterday. Subhan Allah.

00:03:16--> 00:03:18

By the way, what's the score guys? Anyone knows?

00:03:20--> 00:03:24

One new La La quwata illa Villa de la de

00:03:25--> 00:03:33

one new Suhana la people are following football. No, it's okay. It is one note by the way. Now Allah subhanho wa Taala his

00:03:35--> 00:03:46

people are asking us Why did you time it's such that you're going to Cardiff tomorrow. I said just as well. We didn't go to Cardiff today, you know, but my brothers and sisters that will only be understood by the football fans, right.

00:03:48--> 00:04:33

So that high, we have a high you know, we support the football team and we get so excited. I see people who Mashallah they look so religious, they weep, they cry tears when their team is losing. I promise you they make you are like they haven't even made for their own mothers in law. They make do it like they have never made for their family members just for a team for a bowl to be kicked this way. And that way, the point I want to raise is look at how passionate we become, we will follow the team and keep going and the players and everything else. But I promise you the season of Ramadan is far more important. We need to follow it with equally important with meaning with greater zeal.

00:04:34--> 00:05:00

We need to make sure that we actually have this within us to say look, this is the month, I am definitely going to make an effort because my brothers and sisters without an effort it's not going to come. You know don't think that Allah will push you along all the way. You know, you got to push yourself because Allah gave you the energy, make the effort. I promise you without the effort. It's not going to happen. If we didn't make an effort This event was not going to take place. And if you didn't make an effort, this event

00:05:00--> 00:05:19

was not going to take place, you made an effort, we made an effort, we all tried to get this thing coming, get, you know, get it together, that's why it is here. And that's why we're all here. Imagine if somebody didn't think of it. And if somebody if you guys didn't think of coming and contributing towards the success of this beautiful event with such a lovely,

00:05:20--> 00:05:32

you know, place that venue that we've had Alhamdulillah I was just telling one of the brothers, this venue is superb, perhaps we should do more here Subhanallah would each one of you bring along 10 of your friends with you?

00:05:33--> 00:06:14

Sharla Yeah, and we can have a much more impressive event. inshallah, by the will of Allah, Who knows? Well, if you're really keen, you can always write up to light upon light inshallah, and tell them that we will make sure that it happens, inshallah. So, if you don't make an effort, you're not going to be able to achieve when the first day of Ramadan comes already, you should have an intention that this month, I'm going to dedicate, I'm going to dedicate when Ramadan comes, it is a month where you will feel fatigued, you will feel tired, your sleep is going to be upside down, especially in this part of the world, your chores are going to be difficult to fulfill.

00:06:15--> 00:06:42

The night is not going to be so easy. as short as it is, you've got to eat, you've got to make Margaret arratia tarawih, perhaps the 100 becomes a little bit easier, you might want to shorten it slightly, you're going to have to have fudger, and your sleeping times. And you will also hear about the debates regarding the timings of when you're allowed to put a date in your mouth or not. Right? All those debates are in their places, you might be thinking, well, please tell us what's the ruling, you want to know it?

00:06:43--> 00:06:58

No, you don't, I might come up with a third opinion. And I'm gonna cause problems here. I'm not from this part of the world. So I leave it to the local scholars, they've probably studied it more than I have. But I want to tell you they can be they can be more than one correct opinion. Did you hear what I said?

00:06:59--> 00:07:39

I'm a person who firmly believes that if you actually in a matter of HD had in a matter of, you know, where opinions are valid, you can actually have more than one valid opinion. May Allah subhanho wa Taala bless every one of us and accept our fasting. So it's not good enough to say your guyses fasting is not accepted because you know, you you ate for an hour more than we ate. If it is a valid opinion based on evidence and hamdulillah are based on what scholars who are repeatable, are saying then Alhamdulillah May Allah subhanahu wa taala grant us acceptance. I know it's a big debate, big debate. The difference is what one hour, two hours between in the timing, approximately.

00:07:39--> 00:07:40

Can someone tell me

00:07:41--> 00:08:08

about an hour and hours difference? Yeah. So we ask Allah to make it easy for every one of us. Whether you're following the later time, the earlier time, it doesn't mean that you're a bad person. Remember that. So you need to have it within you in advance. You need to know I'm going to be tired. It's not going to be easy, but I'm going to keep going because we want the pleasure of Allah. Allah has promised you Jenna and Jenna is not free. And Jenna is not such an easy

00:08:09--> 00:08:43

achievement when the Hadith says Allah, Allah tala Hvalur, indeed the commodity of Allah is expensive. It's dear, which means it costs you have to pay for it. If it was something so easy, he wouldn't have said that. That's why when there are deeds that you do, and Allah says in return, you get gender, that deed is not going to be easy, it's going to be difficult, it's going to be really difficult. You need to make an effort. I gave an example A few days ago of how when the Heidi says to serve your parents, you will gain Jenna.

00:08:45--> 00:09:17

You need to know that's not going to be easy. It's going to be one of the most difficult things I'm ever going to be able to do, especially as you get older and you've got your own family with your own kids. And then you still have to juggle between your wife and your parents and so on and your family members etc. That is why Allah says you will get Jenna You see, because it's tough. It's very difficult. It's not easy. Same applies to the month of Ramadan to stand with a man and it's up to fast with Iman and the sub. The Hadith says you will be totally forgiven. One narration says you will be given Jenna

00:09:18--> 00:09:57

what's a man and what's a sub Eman is the conviction in your heart the belief that I'm doing this for the sake of Allah for the pleasure of Allah to earn the happiness of Allah subhanho wa Taala the sub means I'm doing this expecting a reward from Allah. Allah promises me a reward and I'm doing this for this reward. Some people say I don't want to do it for the reward. I don't want to do it for this and for that I just want to do it for myself. Well as a Muslim, you need to rectify that intention. You do it for the pleasure of Allah. Allah instructed you That is why you are going to do it. Yes, and you will be happy to do it. So you are actually doing it for the sake of Allah and you

00:09:57--> 00:09:59

will achieve goodness from it. But you need

00:10:00--> 00:10:43

make your mind up from now this Ramadan, I'm going to read for an and I'm going to make sure Come what may, I'm going to cover the entire Quran in this month. Many of us unfortunately, perhaps the majority of us, we don't complete the entire Quran in Ramadan. Right? I want to teach you something this year that will make life so easy for you from now you can download an app, perhaps on foreign central, you can download that app or on central choose one of your favorite recitals. And guess what if the recite is reading a little bit slow, what you do is let the recital read a little bit. And you repeat after the recital. And you repeat after the recital. If you have the opportunity to

00:10:43--> 00:10:53

open the Koran in front of you, you can hear the recitation and read after the recital and you just finish a quarter Jews after every Salah

00:10:55--> 00:11:03

a quarter Jews juice What's that? Not more than 10 minutes after every Salah or sit in the evening and do it for 30 minutes, you've got the whole juice done.

00:11:04--> 00:11:39

Sit in the evening, sit in the morning while you're waiting for it or whatever. But you need to promise yourself from now that's one way of doing things. And that's for those perhaps who might not be professional in recitation of the Quran, and you will perfect or improve your arm. But if you don't have a plan, you're not going to get anywhere. You don't have a goal, what's going to happen. That football match. You don't even know where the goalposts are. And I think some players are like that the way they operate. Open goalpost and the guy flicks it right over and you wonder gosh Did you see man you know, may Allah grant us is

00:11:40--> 00:11:54

this is what's happening to us in Ramadan open goalpost you're not scoring any goals because we don't have a plan we don't even know what we're supposed to be achieving here. So if you have an aim and an objective and you have a goal you will achieve

00:11:56--> 00:12:05

one thing that you have to promise this Ramadan and I made you promise this earlier, I'm repeating the same thing. Do you remember what promise you made earlier today? What was it?

00:12:07--> 00:12:08

We are going to concentrate on our

00:12:10--> 00:12:10

forgotten

00:12:11--> 00:12:12

on our

00:12:14--> 00:12:23

character Subhan Allah, we're going to see the others you've just eaten Mashallah monster hamdallah Milo hawza whatever it was, we forgotten everything else Mashallah Tabarak Allah.

00:12:25--> 00:13:09

We will concentrate on our character many of us in Ramadan, we failed dismally when it comes to character, in your home, with your spouse, with your parents, with your brothers and sisters, with your children with whoever else they may be out of the home those who work with you those you interact with Muslim or non Muslim, whoever they may be, you must improve your character Ramadan is a month of shaming. And Ramadan is a month of working hard on your bad habits. And getting rid of them. If you have bad words that you add in your speech. eradicate them forever, not just for the month of Ramadan, you don't need to use those words, you're a believer, you're upright, the respect

00:13:09--> 00:13:50

that you will enjoy from people is very closely related to the type of language and the expressions on the face that you have. And you use with the people. If you have a good expression, and you use brilliant language, they will respect you come what may. But if you have a bad expression, you're looking gloomy, you're looking like you don't even want to talk to the people. You're looking angry all the time. Trust me, they won't even want to come near you. And if you were to talk to them harshly, they will run away from you. That's why we always say if you want to know if Allah, if Allah has mercy is upon you. Take a look at your character.

00:13:51--> 00:14:11

I'm talking of Muslims and Muslims, we fail to realize sometimes the importance of greatness of character. How do you make people feel when you walk by? Do you acknowledge them? Do you smile? Do you maybe greet them? Do you at least give a good feeling? You know, to the people around you? Subhanallah sometimes we don't.

00:14:12--> 00:14:48

And more importantly, the non Muslims. Because today look what's happening over the globe. People have such a bad misconception that is being unfortunately driven by various sectors across the globe. That Muslims are the worst people on earth yet Subhana Allah every day, aren't we supposed to be struggling to be the best of people? The most charitable, the most compassionate people, the ones with the best language, the best expressions, the ones who reach out not just to humanity, but even to animals. We don't even reach out to animals Subhan Allah.

00:14:51--> 00:14:54

And this is a month of compassion. It's at our doorstep.

00:14:55--> 00:14:59

are we planning to improve our character? It starts today.

00:15:00--> 00:15:07

Cut out your bad words learn to say I'm sorry. Learn to say I love you. I adore you to the right people, by the way.

00:15:08--> 00:15:08

Yes.

00:15:09--> 00:15:48

Learn to say and you earn gentleness through this you make your spouse whom you are supposed to be making feel the best feeling you give them that feeling. Don't you deserve a reward? I mean, that's the mother of your children or the Father. The dedication, the effort, the sacrifice, what they've done what they do on a daily basis, they might make mistakes. We all make mistakes. That's not the end of the world. We will rectify, obviously, depends what mistake they can't punch you up and then you say, didn't you hear they say that? They say it's okay. It's fine. You can give me another chance and you blew anything I heard it, you know, Mallanna mela not let that happen. There is a

00:15:48--> 00:15:54

limit beyond which obviously, you you can walk out. There is a limit, you don't just, you know,

00:15:55--> 00:16:36

sponge in everything. No, there is a limit if someone is abusing you, and that abuse hits a level where it is unacceptable. And you you cannot do anything about it and you would like to perhaps terminate you may follow that path. May Allah subhanho wa Taala protect us, our children, our boys or girls, and all those who are married and even those who are not married, may Allah grant you the spouses who will be the coolness of your eyes. But going back to the issue of character and conduct when we say charity begins at home, it really does. Because in Islam, the beginning of a charity is with your expression. People don't understand that the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him says a

00:16:36--> 00:16:39

charity is to smile at the face of the others.

00:16:41--> 00:16:45

A charity is to smile that's the word of the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him a charity.

00:16:47--> 00:17:24

Moments ago there was a charity raising funds, right? We should have all just said guys, I'll give you 20 smiles. I'll give you 15 smiles you can give me 500 smiles. Mashallah tabarrok Allah, sometimes Your smile is more desperately needed than your money. Do you know that? I know many beggars who say you know, it's just because I'm desperate. But if I wasn't, I would have thrown this money back at the guy's face the way he threw the money at me. You don't ever throw money money is it can be converted into an act of worship with the correct intention and used in the proper way. You place it with respect in the hands of the people you are giving it to you don't ever throw money

00:17:24--> 00:17:37

never respectfully give it a lot of respect. It's a nice amount of Allah. It's a boon. It's a favor. It's a gift. Allah gave you a gift these gifts you don't just throw them. May Allah bless us.

00:17:38--> 00:18:05

This month is a month of giving. It starts with your expression. That's why I said I want to myself personally concentrate on my character this month, I'm going to go out of my way to make sure that everyone around me feels important. They feel loved. They feel great. They feel grant no matter what May Allah make it easy for me and for all of us. I'm inviting you to join me in this challenge. Are you ready?

00:18:07--> 00:18:26

are beautiful lovely Mashallah. Some of the young boys out here are the most enthusiastic about it. But yes, it will make a difference not just with you, with your families with your neighbors with those around you with your cities within your country you will change the perception of who a Muslim actually is Subhan Allah

00:18:27--> 00:18:48

The problem with us when we think Ramadan you know, people were saying you guys are gonna talk the whole day about Ramadan. Yeah, we can talk the whole month about Ramadan. It's okay because we've got things to say that people sometimes have taken for granted. When we say Ramadan What do you think of fasting and tarawih? What else if bar maybe what else? sleeping a lot of people think of sleeping is Ramadan right.

00:18:50--> 00:19:03

And sometimes we were looking for excuses not to fast. Any small excuse Oh, I'm lucky I've got this excuse. I'm not fasting Mashallah. Okay. So hon Allah, Allah subhanho wa Taala make it easy some of the men

00:19:07--> 00:19:09

that may not say what I was about to say.

00:19:12--> 00:19:14

May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us ease.

00:19:17--> 00:19:19

You know, my brothers, my sisters.

00:19:20--> 00:19:57

Without dedication and without hard work, you won't achieve you won't achieve. So let's have the plan and let's fulfill it when the second night of Ramadan comes in. Remember this day, remember what we're promising today? What are we promising? We are saying that when the second night of Ramadan comes in, we won't be lazy. We're going to get up and say, Ah, I'm not going to falter. I'm not dwindling. I'm not going down. I know. We leave the tarawih in the masjid we deliver sometimes talks in the masjid we try not to prolong this year the series will not be more than 12 minutes inshallah.

00:19:58--> 00:19:59

Some people come and say no, please leave

00:20:00--> 00:20:15

No, wait, hang on, hang on. We have to cater for those who really find it difficult to listen to a good talk. So unfortunately, we're going shorter and shorter and shorter. There will come a time when we'll have to get up, speak for three minutes and walk away. Because you'll be losing out on your game, I think

00:20:17--> 00:20:18

I'll make it easy.

00:20:19--> 00:20:36

So, remember, you're going to have to get up again and make sure it happens when we get up for taraweeh. And for the lecture, we notice first day is packed second day, slightly less third day, okay, fourth day is as though everyone is gone former.

00:20:38--> 00:20:38

Mashallah.

00:20:40--> 00:20:42

A week later, they come back with a haircut.

00:20:43--> 00:20:45

And you wonder Marshall, how's your camera?

00:20:46--> 00:21:11

Oh, I thought you went for a haircut. But you were missing from the mustard. We can't even say you are missing from the basket. Because nowadays, it makes it sounds like Oh, so you were taking register here. You know, that's not what we were doing. But I'm just saying guys, you know, come on, let's This is the house of Allah. I promise you when we are connected to the houses of Allah to the masjid. It is a sign of closeness to Allah.

00:21:12--> 00:21:36

If I were connected to your house, and I could walk in there anytime and feel at home, sit comfortably and do what I'd like in the lounge and you know, help myself to the fridge and the whatever else and the food and so on. Doesn't that depict a closeness? in relationship? I can come in and walk out. I promise you if you want a good relationship with Allah, walk into his houses more often.

00:21:38--> 00:21:51

Just go more often. You see the house of Allah stop the Salah, go in Salaam Alaikum brothers How are you guys everything okay, sisters Subhan Allah, you know, in the sense that within your own space, you can also do the same Subhanallah

00:21:54--> 00:22:09

and you know what? You will find a hue difference in your life. Very big difference because the Hadith speaks about Roger localu mala Campbell masajid a person whose heart is connected to the masjid

00:22:10--> 00:22:48

that person will be our last guest on the day of the AMA. Special guests who came to my house so many times today I'm going to honor you that's what it is. It's 37 people who will be granted a special shade on the day of the AMA one of them is a person who whose heart was always at the muskets they wanted to go they wanted to do you know the calmness in the masjid is only felt by those who know it when they go before everyone else. And as you enter and it's still quite empty, you can feel that serenity Subhanallah feel it and you come out feeling so good about things Mashallah just make sure you smile at people. And if someone comes in Uncle Uncle, are you the guy

00:22:48--> 00:23:16

from the hardware, you know, I need to buy a wheelbarrows in China, we talk outside people do this, they discourage you from coming to the mosque by asking you for discounts because that's probably the only time they got to stand next to you and they are building a big building, you know, and they know we're going to save a lot of money. But it's wrong to go into the masjid with the intention of meeting someone for business. And this is why when people say a you know, I need to see okay, I'll see you in the masjid. I say no, no, no, the machine I'm gonna see Allah.

00:23:18--> 00:23:28

We can meet you in the carpark afterwards outside there. Sharla I see what's happening. So panelists, another very interesting factor. My brothers and sisters, this Ramadan, we quitting smoking. Done.

00:23:30--> 00:23:35

Done. Some of you have already quit it. And some of the youngsters saying yes don't even smoke.

00:23:37--> 00:23:53

This Ramadan we cutting smoking, it's going it's being thrown out. The world has thrown it out. We have to throw it out. We have to cut out smoking this Ramadan. You know what one of the worst things ever is for a person to break a fast with a cigarette.

00:23:54--> 00:24:03

And it's happening. I don't know what's going on here. But I'm glad to hear that cigarettes are so expensive that people can't even afford them at times.

00:24:04--> 00:24:39

It's bad for the health is something bad? Isn't it something you should quit for the month of Ramadan? If your heart is not going to be softened by that? What will it be softened by if Rama van didn't stop you from bad then what is going to stop you from bad? If Allah gave you a month to reflect on your bad habits and you haven't done what is going to make you reflect on your bad habit? Are you waiting for something worse to happen to you then perhaps a little car accident? You want to lose a limb you want to be perhaps told that you're terminally ill May Allah grant Shiva to those who are sick and he'll say I mean,

00:24:40--> 00:24:47

do you want to be told about the death of a loved one? What do you want to be told before you're going to change? What do you want write it down? It will come to you.

00:24:49--> 00:24:52

But you know what a winner is a person who doesn't wait for all of that.

00:24:53--> 00:24:59

What are you waiting? What did the law give you? Come on, you've committed enough since cut it, chop it. It's over. Come on. We know what it's all about. Let's now

00:25:00--> 00:25:16

be better people well behaved, we're gonna go to Allah subhanho wa Taala. And we're going to, we're going to live with dignity. And we're going to live in Sharla in a way that we reach out to others. I don't want to think just because I'm living, you know, reading five Salah a day, so I need to look at the others and say guys, I am going to Jenna you know, you guys are not.

00:25:17--> 00:25:22

That's the attitude today, I'm going to gender you guys are not going that's how people think.

00:25:23--> 00:25:47

That thought itself is problematic. It shows that your heart is diseased. Because to feel superior to someone is a problem. You don't know upon what condition you're going to die. And you actually are judged based on how the match ended. You could be losing five new but the match you could win it six five. Do you agree?

00:25:48--> 00:26:21

And when you have five new you already telling people you guys are out you're not going through you you guys are totally this and that that's what happened. There was a comeback six, five, quiet. Same thing happens in our team. We look at others and condemn them and tell the guys you guys there's no hope you guys it's over. You've been so bad. It's out and we walk like we're the big kings here. You don't know tables can turn at any time they have 10 and they keep tending. That's why Be humble, be humble. Look at people with respect. Talk to them. Even if they're struggling with a few things help them through.

00:26:22--> 00:26:24

I'm speaking about smoking, I've witnessed.

00:26:26--> 00:26:28

People come out of the masjid

00:26:29--> 00:26:30

in Ramadan.

00:26:31--> 00:26:34

And the first thing they do is light a cigarette straight.

00:26:35--> 00:26:54

My brother I know you probably have the excuse of saying but you know, I just needed that hang on, it's a month. Cut it out inshallah, ask Allah to help replace it with something healthy. I spoke about exercising and burning a bit of you know, calories or whatever you want through the day.

00:26:55--> 00:27:01

Or even in Ramadan, perhaps even in the evenings, depending on your timing through the day is not bad

00:27:02--> 00:27:02

as well.

00:27:04--> 00:27:15

And I tell you, if you replace cigarettes with something healthy, you won't miss the cigarettes. It's just in your mind. People say but it's effective. It's in the mind.

00:27:16--> 00:27:23

You can help yourself. I know people will hear this later and comments saying now you don't know because you're not a smoker. I know.

00:27:24--> 00:27:26

Because I definitely am not a smoker.

00:27:28--> 00:27:33

So much so that one brother comes to me and says okay, I'll give it up. But tell me, Well, I have it in general.

00:27:35--> 00:27:49

What a question. I'll give up smoking. But will I have it in general? And I says, You know what? Yeah, possibly, if you have a fire delighted, you know, to get that fire, you're gonna have to go somewhere else, you know?

00:27:51--> 00:27:53

Allah subhanho wa Taala. Forgive us.

00:27:55--> 00:28:12

This is the thing my brothers and sisters, were worried about what we're going to get in general without worrying about going to Jenna is a third time I've said it in just as many days. We worried about what we're going to get in general without worrying about getting to Jenna, how ironic. How ironic. So

00:28:13--> 00:28:27

Ramadan is a month of softening your problems that you have your difficulties you have your disputes you have in your family, mostly are connected to a few topics. A few topics. Number one, money

00:28:28--> 00:28:32

connected to wealth, brothers killing each other because of money.

00:28:33--> 00:28:59

wealth, don't worry, I promise you, if you can resolve your matter for the sake of Allah and be the bigger one. Then we have disputes at home. Once you get married and you've got your own spouse and kids, suddenly you have politics with your siblings and your parents and everyone else, cut it. Feed the bigger person. Yes, protect yourself. You know, sometimes it's better to be at a respectful distance than to be disrespectfully together.

00:29:00--> 00:29:20

Did you hear what I said, to be disrespectfully together in one home or in each other's faces is worse than to be at a respectful distance or at a distance? Respectfully, I prefer that I prefer to be at a distance and respectful rather than be in each other's faces. When you're not even getting along.

00:29:22--> 00:29:28

We want to greet each other. We want to be able to resolve matters if solving a problem

00:29:30--> 00:29:36

is simply by saying I'm sorry, when you're not really wrong.

00:29:37--> 00:29:46

Sometimes be the bigger person and say those three words to resolve a 20 year dispute and walk away with a smile

00:29:48--> 00:30:00

in your heart, you know, it's okay, I did it for the sake of Allah fine. And then don't go around saying, you know, I had a big heart. I just said I'm sorry, but I know I was right. These guys were still wrong because now that that wasn't genuine. It's gonna

00:30:00--> 00:30:03

Go back to square one and you're gonna start the problem all over again.

00:30:04--> 00:30:42

our egos let us down my brothers and sisters our egos let us down. I don't want I never I that's it I can't forgive I'm not going to forgive. Imagine when Abu Bakr Siddiq or the law man whose daughter Sharia law, the wife of the professor salon was accused of having an affair all the Billa and you know what? Allah clarified her name. And at the same time Abu Bakr Siddiq was so angry with one of the one of his relatives who was spreading a rumor and that relative was a poor person whom they used to spend on Imagine you're giving a guy a salary every week or every month and that's the same guy who's speaking bad about you and spreading rumors about your family.

00:30:43--> 00:31:00

So Baba Casa de Cali Allahu justifiably human nature. He said, Well, ah, he I'm never going to spend on this person again. And Allah says, on telly, oh, no, Leeming, comosa. A to

00:31:02--> 00:31:24

those whom we have given virtue to those whom we have blessed with the blessings of so many things such as wealth and whatever else. They will not make a promise not to spend on their relatives, they won't make they are those who we have blessed will not stop giving others they will not promise not to give

00:31:26--> 00:31:30

their relatives and those who have done the hegira

00:31:32--> 00:31:44

but instead, forgiven embrace Allah to him Muna me, Fear Allah hula comb, would you not like that Allah forgives you.

00:31:46--> 00:31:50

If you want to learn to forgive you, forgive, embrace.

00:31:52--> 00:31:54

He forgave he embraced.

00:31:56--> 00:32:00

And he was the best to tread this earth after the prophets of Allah subhanho wa Taala.

00:32:02--> 00:32:09

He forgave and he embraced. As difficult as it was, you prepared? I know, each one of us.

00:32:10--> 00:32:44

Each one of us, we have our little struggles. Sometimes these struggles are connected to people whom we just don't want to see. Yes, it's there. But you know, the burden on your shoulders, you can just remove it and release it say, Listen, you know what, it's okay. Even if the person is toxic, and you would like to stay away from them, stay away from them in a beautiful way. What does that mean? No comments. I don't want to say anything good. I don't want to say anything bad. I'm just gonna keep quiet and do my thing. That's also fine. It's the it's the least of the lot, meaning it's the bottom of the list. Someone is toxic, they haven't changed. They keep harming you, they keep attacking you.

00:32:44--> 00:33:04

They keep, you know, letting you down in so many different ways. You are justified to stay away, but don't hold it in your heart. And don't say to people all the time this person is like that I keep quiet. Someone says something, say, Look, I've got no comment. I don't want to say anything. I don't want to mess my mouth. And I'm just going to leave that that's the least you could do.

00:33:06--> 00:33:12

So what I said today, we will forgive as far as possible. Don't let your ego come in the way

00:33:13--> 00:33:20

especially family and others when it gets toxic. And when you know that you know what? I'm not going to be able

00:33:22--> 00:33:30

to live with this person and interact with them. Today I'm teaching you to forgive them but you don't have to interact with them. difference

00:33:32--> 00:33:39

when I was young, and up to not long ago and still we hear people say forgiven forget, I believe that doesn't exist.

00:33:41--> 00:33:47

The forgive part, I can do the forget part. It will take time. You agree?

00:33:49--> 00:33:57

The forget part takes time. It's not in my hands to forget. I will remember. In fact, I should remember so I'm not bitten from the same place twice.

00:33:58--> 00:34:39

should remember but I forgiven when you forgive Do you have to embrace and interact? The answer is it is recommended to do so. But it's not necessary. If the person is toxic. I forgiven but I don't want to interact. Am I justified? Yes, you are. It's okay. Don't worry. Have you seen the difference? Now between the two? There are people I'm sure in your lives. You must be nodding your heads. You've got a little picture cartoon popping up at the top there with a face that's the woman you know, that's the guy right? toxic, which means I don't want but I forgiven I've let it go. I'm not holding it against them. Oh and you make dua for them without them knowing Oh Allah grant them

00:34:39--> 00:34:53

or Allah bless them or Allah. Give them more goodness. Why? Why? That's tough, right? Because when you pray for the goodness of someone else, the angels are asking Allah to give you the same if not more.

00:34:55--> 00:34:59

And to get the dirt out of the angel. You're gonna have to just pray for someone else.

00:35:00--> 00:35:05

You follow what I'm saying? And the layout of the angel is more righteous than yours.

00:35:07--> 00:35:16

It requires a big heart on a blessing give them I remember one guy was told that you know what if you're going to make dua for this enemy of yours

00:35:19--> 00:35:52

when you make the offer yourself, we're going to give you an enemy double. Did you hear that? When you make do out for yourself, we're going to give you an enemy double. So he says, okay, I'd like a mountain of gold. So he got a mountain his enemy got two mountains. He's upset. You've got your mountain You asked for it. So what if we give the other guy or don't give the other guy is irrelevant? He asked for beautiful castle. And the enemy got two of those castles. Whoa, whoa. Then he says, Okay, do me a favor, scare me half to death.

00:35:53--> 00:35:54

Okay,

00:35:55--> 00:36:38

what did he want Subhana. Allah He wanted these that buddy to get scared all the way to death with Allah subhanho wa Taala. Forgive us, Allah forgive us. But this is the nature of men, we cannot see someone flourish when what we have is enough for us, it's more than enough for us. I want to raise one thing that Ramadan should bring about, we are supposed to be reaching out to the poor, the wealthier we get, the more miserly we tend to become. And there are exceptions to that. There are definitely exceptions. But when you have a business, for example, and it's a huge business, you lose sleep over a tech shop that is opened across the road selling something similar to you, you lose

00:36:38--> 00:37:20

sleep, but you're a multi million dollar company, multi million dollar store, and you're worried about a small Tech Shop that is across the road, and you're losing sleep over it, the millions you've made, you're never ever going to use them in your life. And your generations will probably be killing each other because they want your money not even theirs. And you know what? You're worried about a guy who's trying to earn something halaal so what Where does your Eamonn gone in this month of giving, learn to give and be happy when someone else has started up something similar to what you have started because sustenance comes from Allah. I learned this in some of the Middle Eastern

00:37:20--> 00:37:52

countries when I was in Medina and we walked into the stalls and so on. When you go to buy a bias the whole lot of shops or a buyer shops, it makes it easy, they're not upset I have one you're not allowed to have anyone else here I'm the only person here they say no it's fine. I recall a story of a person I used to go and sit with the times and he found something that one of the customers want it and then he says my sister do me a favor the shop down there has had no customers today can you please go and buy the same thing from that person?

00:37:53--> 00:38:05

And then he phones the brother he says hey man, you know what? I'm just sending a customer they're just Baraka you know, so that you can open your day I see no customers have come to you today. Would you do that? Nah, bro. spy for me.

00:38:08--> 00:38:32

Is your Eman gone I rather have one less commodity sold and have be filled with blessing and get to do our that is made for me by the angels and to go out and try and grab someone else's you know opportunity May Allah protect us that's the greed that man has Ramadan is here to clean your greed you're supposed to be cleaning the greed

00:38:34--> 00:38:35

You follow what I'm saying?

00:38:37--> 00:38:37

clear it up.

00:38:41--> 00:38:43

So this Ramadan inshallah we want to soften the heart

00:38:44--> 00:39:10

character conduct dedication shala we're going to read the Quran we're going to be as enthusiastic through the month and when Ramadan ends we are going to continue inshallah with a few little things that we've gained in Ramadan so that if every Ramadan you move five centimeters by the time 10 Rama Deen are completed you've moved half a meter half a meter. And when 20 Ramadan is over, you've done the entire meter what Li hungwen mean? May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant agenda to

00:39:11--> 00:39:19

Allah bless you all. Thank you so much for your attendance this evening. We ask Allah subhanho wa Taala to grant us success and to open our doors.

00:39:21--> 00:39:25

The brothers are telling me that I still have three more minutes so and hamdulillah I can continue.

00:39:26--> 00:39:59

My brothers and sisters. It is very important to seek the forgiveness of Allah. It's the month of forgiveness. Do you know that the minor sins you commit are automatically forgiven without even you knowing as you do good deeds, and as you fulfill your fara, you've done your Salah, you committed one or two minuses you done another Salah. And between the two Salas there's a great possibility that Allah just wiped out those sins, because now you did a good deed in Al Hashanah to Habana say

00:40:01--> 00:40:44

Indeed good deeds, wipe out bad deeds. When you do good deeds, you wipe out the bad deeds. So one of the ways of increasing your closeness with Allah subhanho wa Taala, or the closeness to Allah subhanho wa Taala is by increasing your good deeds. Someone told me I've got a bad habit, what should I do? And I said, my brother, this bad habit to eradicate it, you need willpower, you need to ask Allah and you need to increase your good deeds. So by increasing good, you won't have much time for the bad anymore. Increase the good. It's like a seesaw. If I'm increasing on one side, the other side is naturally going to become light. And if I've increased the one the other one becomes light

00:40:44--> 00:41:05

and so on. So remember to seek the forgiveness of Allah and to increase your good deeds so that it can remain because many of us seek the forgiveness of Allah we fall back into the sin. seek the forgiveness of Allah regret remorse fell back into the sin, but don't allow that to happen. If it does, don't lose hope in the mercy of Allah.

00:41:06--> 00:41:20

But don't plan it be strong. learn to say no. Learn to just say no for the sake of Allah subhanho wa Taala and you find the goodness you find the purity help people along and see what happens to you, my brothers and sisters.

00:41:21--> 00:41:24

Remember that Allah subhanho wa Taala sent this Koran

00:41:26--> 00:41:30

and the Quran is going to bear witness for you or against you.

00:41:31--> 00:41:35

This Koran will come on the day of judgment and talk about you.

00:41:36--> 00:42:10

Al Quran with a jet to laka our Lake the spawn is either for you or against you. Let the Quran be bearing witness for you by learning it, reading it, understanding it, putting into practice conveying it to others and understanding the context of revelation for Indeed, the verses of the Quran have a context without understanding the context. Sometimes you could misunderstand things may Allah subhanahu wa taala protect every one of us are kulu kolyada wa sallahu wa salam o Bala Kala Nabina Muhammad wa salam aleikum wa barakato