SINFUL DIVORCE! TALAQ! TALAQ! TALAQ!

share this pageShare Page
Mufti Menk

Channel: Mufti Menk

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:00--> 00:00:40

Salam aleikum. Did you know that it is very sinful to issue a divorce by saying talaq, talaq, talaq thrice, it is very sinful, it's the wrong way of doing things. It's not what the prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him has taught us, I want to explain to you how beautiful Islam is. If you're married, and you're having problems, and you really cannot solve the problems, Islam tells you to try and involve the elders from both sides to see if a solution can be found. And Allah says in the Quran, a URI de la

00:00:41--> 00:00:43

fibrillar.

00:00:45--> 00:01:28

If both parties would like to solve the problem, then Allah will grant them that Allah will grant them acceptance to be able to find a solution. So if it's not a blame game, and if you're not trying to prove who was right and wrong, and both of the parties are genuinely looking to solve the matter, Allah says, we'll help you both. But in the rare case where Subhanallah the parties cannot get along, they really want to separate pathways. It is part of the mercy of Allah that we can divorce. Imagine if divorce was not prescribed in Islam, that's it, you were doomed with a person you didn't want to be with. I mean, part of the mercy of Allah is to allow you and I to go through divorce if

00:01:28--> 00:02:16

needed unnecessary, because we just can't get along. So Allah says, You know what? You issue one out of three, bollocks. That's it. You never ever give more than one. It's just one. And what do I do? Allah says, well, when you've issued the one, we allow you a separation period of three menstrual cycles, you separate. And during that time, that one revocable bollock or divorce would actually be held in a way that Allah is giving you a chance to reconcile within the three menstrual cycles if, for example, you feel no, we need to get back we need to try and so on, you're allowed to get back within that time, no strings attached, no, nothing you can you can solve the matter and come back.

00:02:17--> 00:03:03

And then at some point later in the future, if you still didn't get along, and you want to go back to your own ways, and separate, Allah says, will allow you to do it a second time. So I got back. And after a few months or years, I decided now we still cannot get along. So Allah says no problem, you can give the second Palak to. So the second one comes only after you've tried only after you've gotten back after the first one, and reconciled, and then you didn't get along. And then the second one comes in play. Look at how merciful Allah is Allah says, we'll give you another three menstrual cycles to consider. If you get back Alhamdulillah, it's a good thing. But the third time this

00:03:03--> 00:03:47

happens, then you need to marry someone else. What's the reason? Allah says if it's the third time, then we now don't want you to keep doing the same thing. And getting back and going back and getting back and reconciling and splitting and reconciling and splitting. You only allowed to do that twice the third time, you must go your own ways. And you must get married to someone else, when the wife marries someone else. And she realizes, perhaps this guy is such a brilliant guy Alhamdulillah she's happy in the new marriage. So be it, we're happy to. But if she's not, and she gets a divorce from that guy without the interference of the first husband. In that case, Allah says now because we know

00:03:47--> 00:03:54

you've seen a scenario worse than what you were in in the first place, we will give you the chance to go back

00:03:55--> 00:04:35

to the first husband, and you can start afresh so you get a new nikka done a new appreciation of a marriage, and you're all set to go. And now you will appreciate you know this husband originally the first one, he had 10 things wrong with him. But the second one had 20 things wrong with him or 10 things but they were worse. I'd rather go back to the first guy. So it makes sense. So you don't just use up all your life. You never just issue three catalogs all at once you don't do that it's sinful. There is a way of doing things in Islam, you must be respectful, and don't just issue it in anger. Don't just issue it at any time. It's a major thing. Think about it. So panela now, say for

00:04:35--> 00:04:59

example, one block was given we did not reconcile we went our own ways. What do I do? Well, I'm allowed to as a woman, a woman is allowed to marry anyone she wants after that, even though there was just one block or the fact that the the waiting period or the three menstrual cycles are over or if it was an irrevocable talav. Once that waiting period of three menstrual cycles is over. She can marry anyone she wants, including

00:05:00--> 00:05:40

The original first husband because there was no second or third ballot, so you never ever need a second or a third. If you have one. And it was irrevocable, or there it the waiting period finished, it's over. It's over, you don't ever need a second or a third. That's it, it's done. Because you can marry whoever you want, if you wish. And you're no longer the wife of that first person. But you can go back to him if you want, because there was only one HELOC. So do you see why we should never be issuing two or three, we should never just be giving three all at once. The second one is a gift. It's only when you've reconciled and you cannot make the marriage work for the second time, then you

00:05:40--> 00:06:23

give the second one. And if you came back after the second one, whether it was you know, after the waiting period, you had your new reconciliation or nikka done, or it was within that waiting period, you just got back together because it was re vocable. Either way, the second time you try and make it work. If it didn't work a second time. Like I said, that's when you issue the third one. So I hope I've educated you guys. Regarding this. It's a very beautiful way of divorce. To be honest, it's the best teachings on earth regarding divorce, it gives you three different chances. Don't blow those chances all at once. So remember, it is wrong to issue three blocks at once. You never need to

00:06:23--> 00:07:12

do that. In fact, it is sinful. You only ever give one block one divorce or three. And I just want to make mention before I end my beloved sisters, if you're in a marriage where your husband is not fulfilling your rights, he is oppressing you or he has abused you. And you really want to get out of that marriage. And you know, don't think that he is the only guy who can issue the divorce. No, you can actually apply for a nullification to an Islamic court or to a panel of scholars, the Mufti etc, they will study the matter, they will see if you know it is to be awarded, if really, there's something wrong, they will try to look into the matter. And they will award you what is known as a

00:07:12--> 00:07:52

nullification or a first of that particular marriage. So you're no longer the wife. Whether the man wanted it or not, is irrelevant, because if he didn't fulfill your rights, he didn't give you a Mahara. He doesn't. He's not intimate, or he really abuses you or something serious has gone wrong, when you are allowed to get that so you can apply for a nullification. That's not called Hola. It's called a nullification or a fossa. And what is a hula? hula is when you don't really have a reason to get away. But you don't want to be in the marriage, right? As a woman, and you just want to get out of it. He hasn't really done anything badly wrong to you. You want to get out of it. And you you

00:07:52--> 00:08:34

can actually give back your mother, the mother meaning the amount he paid as a gift initially for you, when you got married, you can give that back if he agrees to take it back in return in return for issuing a talaq. So that is a whole lot. For a whole lot. You still need your husband's approval, but for a nullification you don't need his approval. I hope I've educated you on that too. Perhaps if you would like me to talk about that in detail I have in the past, then you can leave a comment below and inshallah we will take a look at this. It's very, very interesting. And I think we needed to know about this. In the meantime, I pray that Allah protect all of us those who are not

00:08:34--> 00:08:55

married, may Allah grant you spouses who will be the coolness of your eyes, those who are married May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant you happiness. Those who do have turbulence in their marriages. May the almighty make it easy for you to resolve your matters. May Allah bless us all with children who will be the coolness of our eyes Jazakallah salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato wa sallahu, wa salam ala nabina Muhammad