Dealing with Difficulty #18 Haters & Jealousy

Dealing with the difficulty of haters and jealousy

is not easy.

Nowadays, we're living in an age of social

media and technology, where haters make their hate

apparent.

At times,

hiding behind

anonymity,

and sometimes causing problems for us by saying

things and doing things that are derogatory,

belittling, sometimes that cause damage to us.

So remember one thing, I want to speak

on both sides of the coin. If you're

a person

who has hatred in your heart or you're

jealous of people, you need to remember it

ruins your chances of entry into paradise

in a proper way. And it also ruins

your good deeds if you have any. The

hadith says,

That jealousy eats away the good deeds in

the same way that

fire would eat a dry log.

So we need to remember if we want

to save ourselves,

be jealous of others.

Don't be jealous of others. Allah has provided

Allah gave them whatever you're jealous

of. Be it their position, be it their

knowledge, be it their wealth or their looks

or whatever else it may be their intellect.

Allah has given them all of this. It's

not them and it's not someone else. It's

your Lord. The one who made you is

the one who decides who is going to

get what. So if Allah has given them,

you are jealous of something that the Lord

has chosen.

In a nutshell, you're becoming a person who

has a problem with Allah.

That's why Allah says, it will eat away

your good deeds. So on this side of

coin, if you're a person who is jealous

or who has hatred,

then remember to deal with it to remedy

your heart.

Because

it's difficulty dealing with haters. But it's even

more difficult when you are a hater and

you don't even realize the damage of it.

So learn to spread peace, to spread goodness.

If you disagree with someone, do so in

a beautiful manner because you're a human. You've

been blessed with a brain and a capacity.

A capacity to be able to teach

and to be able to discuss and even

present positive arguments.

If you think that a certain issue requires

for you to raise your voice, you may

do so, but do so in a dignified

manner always.

It shouldn't be condescending and it shouldn't be

filled with hate.

When you spew that hate, especially against your

brothers and sisters,

It really it shows who you are and

what your own level is. More than what

it shows about the other person.

Now, we speak of the other side of

the coin.

If you are a victim of haters,

you need to ask yourself,

where are they attacking me or how is

it affecting

me? Many times they would be attacking on

social media in today's day and age.

Sometimes around the workplace, sometimes

at home, sometimes in the neighborhood, sometimes at

school or college,

sometimes maybe on public transport or in the

public, they show you their hate.

You need to realize, firstly, we protect ourselves.

Read your

your verses of protection

everyday.

The last 2 Suras of the Quran have

in them

powerful words. An example is in Surat Al

Falak,

Oh Allah protect me from the evil of

the hater or the the jealous person when

he is jealous. And jealousy and hatred are

quite connected

because a person who's jealous of you wouldn't

really like you. And similarly, a person who

hates you could end up becoming jealous

of what you have. So although they are

not exactly the same thing, they are somehow

intertwined and interconnected.

My brothers and sisters, reading these surahs and

some of the supplications

that the prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him,

has taught us on a daily basis will

protect you from the evil effects of the

hater.

We may not be able to stop the

hater or stop the jealous person. That's why

the Quran says

from

the evil

of the jealous person when he is jealous.

So

we need to read that and be convinced

that they cannot harm you. They will never

be able to affect you negatively. Don't let

it bother you, make you scared.

Don't let it make you suffer anxiety.

You need to learn to understand we're on

earth. On earth, there are all sorts of

people. There are good people, there are bad

people. Perhaps the majority may be good people,

but unfortunately,

even good people can have

a straight or 2 or a quality or

2 that is not good. So it's normal

to have a good person, and 1 or

2 things about them may not be that

good. But predominantly

they're lovely people. Masha'Allah. I have weaknesses and

so do you. It doesn't make me a

bad person. I need to work on these

weaknesses and keep trying. But I should try

not to affect others because I fear the

day I'm going to go back to Allah

Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.

Haters will not be able to harm you.

In fact,

Allah will cause your success as a direct

result of their hatred if you bear patience.

In Surat Yusuf, the brothers became jealous of

their own brother. They began to hate him.

They planned his downfall.

As a result of that jealousy, that hatred,

they planned his downfall. They did something to

him. But Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala had a

plan such that the same thing they did

was going to result in him long term

being elevated

way above them. This is why if someone

speaks about you online,

look at who they are. Sometimes they are

not worth responding to. Many people use a

path of becoming famous by attacking those

online who might have a little bit of

popularity.

As you grow up the ladder of your

wealth, your fame,

you've got nothing. In fact, there is a

couplet in the Arabic language that says, the

worst person is the one who spends a

day without anyone being jealous of him or

her, because he's got nothing.

So the minute you have something, expect it.

The haters are there. And subhanAllah, it's not

easy to distinguish

at times between a hater and the one

who sincerely wants to advise you and correct

you. But there are a few red flags

you look for.

If someone has swiped at you in public,

remember that's a red flag, perhaps they're haters

and they don't mean well. If someone meant

well, like if we mean well for someone,

we would then

go to them in a dignified manner in

privacy and let them know how we feel.

If it is a matter that we feel

is important for people to know, we would

give them a chance. We would actually try

hard with them and we may want to

highlight to the people to protect general people

from the harm of the particular thing that

may be done.

However,

if it is something between them and Allah,

then don't go out exposing them and belittling

them because that's not a good thing. If

someone has done it to you, remember

Allah is your Lord. They're not your Lord.

You need to connect with Allah

a lot of prayer. Look, the prophet

was told

And indeed we know that

your chest is being tightened by what they're

saying, which means it's affecting you. You know,

the tightening of the chest could mean so

many things.

It's definitely

a sadness. In another verse, Allah says,

indeed, we know whatever they're saying is making

you sad.

But Allah says,

declare the praise of your Lord.

Or you could say,

powerful supplication, declaring the praise of Allah and

declaring the glory of Allah and declaring that

he is the one who has all the

might and the power.

Nobody can harm you besides Allah. There are

so many other supplications that you need to

learn regarding

this type of

hate and the type of

jealousy that people may have, how to protect

yourself from it. So Allah Almighty says whatever

they've said, don't worry.

Declare the praise of your Lord and be

from among the prostrators.

Pray, pray

more. Be in prostration.

Prolong your prostration

and you will find comfort in it

and worship Allah right to the end until

the day of your death.

Connect with Allah. It should be such a

solid connection

that no matter what people say or do,

it will have the smallest

impact upon you, if any at all.

grant us ease.

grant us ease.